Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Refugio Para el Amor #7-8 Tue 5/29/12 Hell is No Place for Little Doves

• Our little dove (palomita) Luciana is dressed like a little devil in a red dress and red wig, when in walks our galan Rodrigo, enjoying a 21st century stag party with his bffs, their girlfriends, and his fiancé, Gala. The girls got to choose the fancy restaurant for dinner, so the boys got to choose Club Inferno for the after-party. Does our galan recognize our little dove? It’s not clear, but he’s clearly attracted to her, and is the only one of his party who treats Luciana with respect and kindness. He says out loud, to his fiancé, that the waitress is a very good looking girl. (We question our galan’s will to live, as his very possessive fiancé shoots daggers at him and the little devil girl waitress after this remark.)
• The bartender thinks Luciana is cute and nice and wonders why Violeta would bring her to work in a place like El Inferno. Ivan, the manager also thinks she’s just right for his favorite client, Mr. Lastra, who looks like a comic book version of the Devil. Lastra orders Ivan to bring Luciana/Joana to him for a little up close and personal time on his lap. The fact that she’s fresh off the bus from het het is even more of a turn on for him.
• Rodrigo tries to talk to Luciana/Joana alone by pretending he needs some cigarettes, but gets cock blocked by his fiancé Gala.
 • After refusing his advances at his private booth, Luciana is cornered by Lastra in front of the bathrooms. She yells for help, hits him with her sparkly spike heels, and scratches the side of his face. He’s got her pinned to the wall when Rod comes to the rescue, fists flying. Lastra has bodyguards who start attacking Rod, but soon Rod’s two bffs join the fray. Luciana locks herself safely in the ladies’ room as the fight spreads onto the main floor and turns into a full brawl. The cops are called, and Rod and his peeps get the heck out of Dodge. Gala is none too happy that Rod started a fight for that little devil girl. She bitches at him all the way to her house. He says he couldn’t let any woman be disrespected like that.
• The cops arrive and Lastra raises a stink and tries to get Luciana arrested. First he accuses her of attacking him and scratching him. She gets up in his face and puts him in his place. When he insults her, she slaps him hard, right in front of the cops. You go girl! She refuses to be intimidated and the cops seem to be siding with her. Then Lastra claims that his wallet is missing and accuses Luciana. He wants her to strip, right in front of them all! Luciana of course refuses. Violeta takes her to the ladies’ room to cool down while the men search for the wallet. The nice bartender quickly finds the wallet, but Lastra still wants to get Luciana thrown in jail for assault.
• Having heard enough of this bs, Licenciado Linares, a loyal customer of Violeta/Coral, steps up and flexes his lawyer muscles. He calls Lastra on his bs, and says he will defend Luciana/Joana if need be. He gives Luciana his card, and Lastra blusters off. Lic Linares later offers Violeta and Luciana a ride home. He tells them he defended Luciana because she could have been his daughter. (Viewerville’s tn radar goes off, because these things are usually significant later.)
• Doña Estela/Estelita stays up late praying for the safe return of the girls. She’s not really worried about Violeta, who can take care of herself in rough places like El Enferno, but she’s really worried about innocent Luciana. The next day Luciana confides in Estela that she hated it and refuses to work there again. Violeta is more concerned about Luciana paying for her keep, and making sure Ivan doesn’t fire her because of Luciana’s antics. She forces Luciana to accompany her to the club the next day to apologize to Ivan.
• At the club, Luciana does NOT apologize to Ivan. He’s pissed; so is she. Rodrigo arrives to ask how the little devil waitress is. Ivan hustles Rod out before he sees Luciana, but Luciana knows exactly who he is and is flattered that Rod cared enough to check up on her. Downstairs, Ivan spews lies about “Joana” and tells Rod that she’s basically a thieving whore. And if Rod likes her, he’ll find out her fee and get her for him. Rod is disappointed and disgusted. He refuses the offer and quickly leaves. The nice bartended hears it all. Once he returns to the girls in his office, Ivan pulls the same trick on Luciana and tells her Rod wanted to know her fee. She has the same reaction as Rod.
• Brigida whines to Matilde about all the extra work in the house. She convinces Rosaelena to get an extra maid for the house, but is then annoyed when Rosaelena puts Matilde in charge of finding someone. In our small tn world, Matilde’s sister happens to be Landlady Estela, and she knows just the girl for the job. On her first morning on the job, Luciana gets a hearty welcome from sweet Hannah, who pulls Luciana into the living room via the front door. Rosaelena is livid. How dare a servant enter through the front door! Brigida convinces her that they can scare the bejeezus out of the new girl, pay her a low salary, make her life miserable, and fire her whenever she wants. Rosaelena likes this plan.
• Basically the whole episode, Rosaelena is a bitch to her husband, her servants, her daughter, her future daughter-in-law, and the mother of her future nuera. She’s a bitter control freak who wants to control her grown and teenage children’s lives. For example, she gets in a snit that Rod, a man in his 20s-30s is out late with his friends and fiancé. Max, her husband, tells her many times to shut it. Then he goes off and meets his sexy mistress in a bubble bath. He calls her “Licenciado” on the phone to throw off suspicion. I’m not hating on him. I’d stray with that harpy at home too.
 • Gala plays coy with horny Rod and basically tells him, if you like it, then put a ring on it. They decide to have the big engagement party that weekend. Gala is NOT willing to jump through hoops to get her first marriage annulled in order to make Rosaelena happy with a Church wedding. She’s also not interested in Rod’s money and wants to marry with separation of assets/goods. She’s got her own money and her own career. The only thing she wants is HER man. Her mama Julie wants a lot more than that, and is salivating thinking of all the Torreslanda $$. She thinks the 2 years + that Gala and Rod have been dating is more than enough.
• In a series of near misses, the brothers Torreslanda do not see that cute Norteña girl Luciana is the new maid hired to help in the house and with Patricio. Patricio refuses to let anyone but immediate family come into his room and see his pitiful self. Luci only sees his side profile from outside his room. He does not see her at all. Later, Rod rushes home to quickly pack a suitcase for a last minute Miami business trip to buy shares in a golf club. Matilde sends Luci off to find Rod’s red sweater. He is in too much of a hurry to wait, and is about to get in his car when Luci rushes out the door, sweater in hand, and sees him. “It’s him!” We end on that cliffhanger and cara impactada de Luci.

Meanwhile in the outskirts of Chihuahua (aka Het Het):
• Don Aquiles’s lackey, Procopio, may have trouble counting (they really need a calculator for adding up their ill-gotten gains), but Don Aquiles can add 1+1 and get 2. He’s figured out that the only person Luciana knows outside of their Podunk town is Violeta in Mexico City. He lounges around in his purple and black satin robe, fondles his gold, almost starts crying about the loss of his palomita, and tries to figure out how to get Violeta’s address. He tries to trick little Ariche into telling him, but the kid is too clever to fall for it.
• We find out that Magda has never told anyone, not even her bff Paz, who Violeta’s father is. In fact, she never even told HIM he has a child. Viewerville files this away in our memory banks. Magda is sure Violeta will never return to her land and her people. In Mexico City, Violeta confirms this and proudly tells Luci that she’s a city girl now, not a Norteña.
• Procopio continues to eavesdrop on Lorenzo and Paz to try to find out Luci’s location.
• Paz’s hand needs an operation and the family has no money (since she makes money with her hands making pottery). Lorenzo leaves a message with Estela for Luci, spilling the beans about their mama’s hand. Luci frets even more about finding a job.

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El Talismán #85 Tue 5/29/12 Roe v Tumor


The very first scene leaves us puzzled as to why someone in hiding (Lu) would choose to wear too tight jeans and 4” platforms. Here I am having a rare Tuesday off today, with the house to myself and am enjoying sweats, flip flops and no bra. Lu is flipping out about Camila being preggers.  Antonio tells her not to worry, of course the only hijos Camila will be having are mis hijos.

We speed along the Fresno Freeway to General Hospital where Antonio has brought Camila to find out why she isn't “feeling well”.  In walks Dr. Huckleberry Hound (or is it Droopy Dog he looks like?). He says they'll run some tests.

Over at El Tal Mariana is talking to Pedro about her feelings for him.  She knows she should love him as a brother, but sees him as a man. I guess that depends on your definition of  “man”. He tells her to give it time and as her thoughts become clearer, so will her feelings.  “Miraremos a ver que pasa” We'll see what happens. He says she will be fine.  He'll always be at her side, just like he promised her father.

Santiago comes downstairs and is still hungry!  Pedro exits, and Mariana tells Santiago that before they eat she wants to run to El Alcatraz to talk to Camila. Santiago gets a horrified look and tells her it is very peligroso over there.  She says she has to find out if Camila still loves Pedro.  Santiago says if you insist, I care so much for Pedro and Camila, that I'll go with you and help you.  Mariana calls him an angel.

Back at the hospital Camila and Antonio are in the … wait for it... waiting room! They wait and wait while Bowling Green's Marching Band offers us background tunes.

Dr. Huckleberry Hound come back and regretfully has bad news.  He tells Camila she has a cancerous tumor.  Antonio stifles a giggle (are we allowed to say “Prick” on this blog?).  Dr. HH says to not worry, there are treatments.  Camila is shaken.  Dr. HH  suggests Antonio leave and let him speak with Camila alone.  PLEASE tell her the truth!!!!!!  Commercial.

Back from commercial, and no honesty going on here.  If Camila doesn't trust him, she is free to get a second opinion.  “No, no, no, no es necessario.  No dudo en decirmelo.”  Ditz. “Okay! Let's operate!”
In the waiting room Antonio is talking with Dr. Doh-Mo about Pig's poisoning. Dr. Doh-Mo says he's lowered the dosage making the Pig slow, dumb and clumsy and he will eventually lose mobility.  Antonio relishes the thought.

At Dr. Manuel's he and Maria are having breakfast together (ooh la la, they diiiiid it).  They cozy up at the table and talk fondly of anoche until the doorbell rings.  It's Elvira and without her headband a lock of hair is actually falling out of her ponytail.  She tells Manuel “me urge hablar con Maria”.  The urgent thing she had to see her sis about was to call her a “cualquiera” and say she's not going to live in the house of a tramp.  Maria says “fine, move out already”.  Elvira storms out saying “you'll pay me for this”.  She goes home and gripes to Armando about Maria being happy, and Armando tells her about Camila's tumor.

Luuny has snuck out in her Cher disguise and is hiding behind a pillar watching Pedro and Margarito work their drills.  Pedro catches a glimpse and tells Margarito it seems like he just saw Lu.  Margarito says that's impossible.  Ella esta muerta.  POR FIN Pedro speculates that maybe Lu wasn't in the shed when it burned. Margarito says the police found human remains.  So, that answers that.  Antonio did dig up somebody and plant their bones. Sick.

Mariana and Encyclopedia Brown are hiding in the bushes and see Camila coming home from the doctor's.  They overhear her telling Tracy she has a cancerous tumor.  The run back and tell Padre and Pedro.

Tracy's reaction to the tumor news is that maybe Camila is pg and should go see another doctor.  No, Camila says she has confianza en este medico.  The same doctor who just pocketed a cheque from Antonio. As we break to commercial, Camila is wistful about what if she had been pregnant with el hijo de Pedro.

Pig is at the police station.  Has anyone else noticed he's actually been looking leaner as time goes on with this show?  We may have to change his name to Turkey Bacon. So, TB is hollering at El Capitan that he wants Pedro locked up for killing his hija.  Capitan says to wait for the trial and jury to decide.  TB has one of his spells and walks out with Poult Poncho's help.  Turkey Bacon decides to take justice into his own hands.

Padre goes to visit Camila and TB gets mad at her for having visitors.  He doesn't even want a priest around saying they have long tongues.  Is that true?  If so, what a waste.  Our long-unused-tongued Padre tries to convince Camila to be upfront with Pedro.  Just then Elvira walks in, and now the loose hair is on the other side of her head.  I guess she should go back to wearing the headbands.  She gives Padre a dirty look and spouts off about the bad things Dios has done to her daughter.  Padre throws it right back with “It's not Dios who has done bad things to your daughter...it's you.”  YES!!!!!!!

Sarita is STILL on Gabe's case about getting married.  He tells her he loves her, what's the need to get married?  Just look at Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell.  Pedro comes up and requests his horse be saddled. He tells Margarito he loves Camila so much he'd rather her be with Antonio than dead, but he has to be with her now.

Nighttime:  It's dark, it's scary.  Pedro is riding his horse. Turkey Bacon comes up out of nowhere and, without hesitation, shoots Pedro.  Pedro drops and rolls.  Personally I think the “clothes on fire” drill is unnecessary for a gunshot wound.  Let's hope it keeps Pedro alive.

INCIDENTALS:
-       Doris is storming around and griping to Turkey Bacon that Antonio gave Camila HER bedroom.
-       Angel admits he likes Flor (but why?). 
-       We get the answer to “Who Wears Short Shorts?”.  It's Flor, to school.
-       When Lu came running back into the hideaway Antonio was waiting for her.  She wanted him to hurry with everything so she could be with Pedro.  He said “everything in its own time”.  She crazily replied “tic toc tic toc”.
-       Lu tells Valentin she wants to go to El Tal

AVANCES:  Antonio points a gun at Camila saying he's going to kill her.


Recap by Rosemary la Otra           Posted by Blue Lass

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El Talismán #84 Mon 5/28/12 The Wedding Night From Hell or Look Who's Hungry



Recap by: Anita

None of the names have been changed to protect the guilty.

El Rewound - Antonio is menacing Camila with a forcible consummation of their marriage...why won't she submit to him. He's her husband now. He's Hungry for Camila. They continue the argument they started on Friday. She reminds him that he obligated her. Doesn't she understand he luuuurves her and adores her? He'll never hurt her. Camila retorts, he forced her into this marriage and now wants to bed her-he's ruined her life-never, she swears. Ant hisses through his teeth-all because of ese Indio-she can't stop thinking of him, right? He follows up with , Wait For It,-You are going to be MIA.

Santiago is Hungry. The sad folks at El Tal are in the kitchen trying to make the best of a bad situation. Food will comfort them, Pedro is sad and not Hungry. The only ray of hope is that they are sure they'll find Santiago's mom (and she can cook up a storm, according to the half-pint). >>FF

El New -Over at El Alkietrash, Alberta and Florencia are walking down the hallway. Flo hears screaming coming from the honeymoon suite. It's Camila trying to fend off Antonio. She's sure something is wrong. Alberta reassures her that it's probably only a lover's spat, reminding her that Camila didn't marry the Man in the Beltbuckle for love. Flo thinks this is different, but Alberta persuades her to leave the two lovebirds alone. (The only reason I think Alberta didn't interfere is that her job is on the line. If Flo gets dispatched to an internado, her dusting, gossiping and sweeping days at El-Al will be over, to say nothing of her paycheck.)

The Wedding Night From Hell continues for Camila. She is resisting with all her might-she's never going to let him have his way. He's on top of her now and Antonio is sure that eventually she'll fall in love with him. He tries to eat her neck. Then her lips.

Miracle of Miracles, Antonio's struggles with Camila come to a merciful end. After trying to get her to kiss him (spread her legs, etc.), he gives up, as Camila turns into a dry, limp rag. What a gentleman he turns out to be. He departs in digust-thwarted, yet maybe (IMHO) a bit proud that he is not the abuser everyone thinks he is (well at least he himself thinks that-don't ask the ladies he's been with lately). Frustration is written all over his face.


Next there is a glimpse of Doris tossing and turning in El Piggo's bed while he sleeps. Dam*, she's  Hungry  for El Alcatraz, but the thought of El Piggo being her meal ticket makes her gag. How she wishes she could have a man for love. She gets up to get a breath of stale El Trashy air, that is still smelling of booze, cigars and leftovers.  


Antonio is Hungry for sex, any kind, with any body and voila, who is prowling the hallway, but his reviled ex-wife. They sort of bump into each other, not in a nice way. They exchange words first. Doris serves-is your new wife tired of you already? Antonio volleys with a big Callate for her cheeky insolence. She lobs another one-so it's true, then, she threw you out-and here the two of us are so good in bed. These words are followed by grabs, gropes, and a rush to the living room to disrobe and fall on the floor behind a counterfeit Tiffany lamp, in a passionate (?) embrace. (Viewerville is left to imagine that some humping ensues that will satisfy both of their hungers.)

Camila has escaped the worst night of her life relatively unscathed, but scared for any future encounters. She just has to find a way to avoid her mother being sent to prison, but she doesn't want another night like this one. How much more can she stand. She pleads with the Virgencita to help her. Then she recalls her night (or nights) with Pedro and how it feels to make love with the man you love.

Lucrecia is still holed up in the cabana. She is just plain Hungry. Valentin shows up with a take-out from the Only Take-Out in Fresno (What?? There were no leftovers from the reception he could have brought her?). She greets him as if nothing had happened earlier that day, but does take a moment to aplogize. She's also Hungry for company. Valentin complies and listens, probably not too attentively while Lulu brags about her encounter with Mariana and the 1-2 punches she gave her. Valentin cautions her to be careful. Lulu hopes this nightmare will all be over soon so she can go back to the land of the living. She hates being dead.

Flo and Alberta are still together back in Flo's room. Flo is mulling over the fact that her dad is not the person she thought he was. Alberta cheers her up-think of something nice-and that would be Angel. She melts.

Army and Angel are back home, out of theri wedding garb and sitting around casually in jeans and sports shirts. These boys are always Hungry , but they settle for something non-alcoholic to drink. Angel is on the phone with Maria. Apparently she's not coming home for dinner. She has a date with Manuel. Angel tells her to have fun. Then the boys start to talk about Tia's new happiness. However, the conversation comes back to what a witch Elvira is. Army can't stand her - look what she did to Camila.

Scene with Santiago in the kitchen again. He's still Hungry , working on pie. Pedro is still sad, day-dreaming the same recuerdos of love that Camila was having. >>FF.

Don Greggorio, meanwhile, is having a terrible bad night. He's Hungry for freedom from this bad dream of being locked up in jail with the Not-So-Giant Beltbuckle mocking him through the bars that it's life in prison for him. He's upset that Doris is gone from his bed. He gets worked up about Mariana. He's Hungry to get rid of her. All this anxiety is just killing him.

Doris and said Buckle finish up their floor exercises. Doris is in a gleeful mood-just look at what your wife missed out on. Fijate, you always end up with me. She gets another Callate for her musings. Doris comes right back with, it's odd that you weren't able to make Camila, Wait For It, MIA on your wedding night. Ant's excuse was that Camila really wasn't feeling well; she fainted at the ceremony. Yes, Doris heard about that, but strange, don't you think; it shouldn't have kept her from making love with her husband on her wedding night. So, ha-ha, your wife doesn't love you. He starts to give her a catchetada to the right cheek but Doris stops him-you do and everyone will know that you weren't with your wife last night. In a post-coital fury, Antonio stalks out. Guess WHO is watching from around the corner? It's Panchito.

Doris exits to return to El Piggo's bedroom and runs into Panchito, still watching. He's Hungry to be the Next 007 or Agent 86. He actually puts 1+1 together to note they both emerged from the same room, rather disheveled. Caught in this semi-compromising position, Doris tries to weasel out, but Panchito is too astute and calls her on it. Don G is not going to like this when he finds out about it, he crows. He knows she was with Antonio. Doris mulls it over-quickly, mind you, Ok, how much money does he want to keep quiet?

Mariana, now staying at El-Tal in her old bedroom, is also having a terrible bad night. First she relives (and we have to, too), the boffetadas from the Ghost of Fresno Past telling her to stay away from Pedro. Then she begins to dream of her desire to be married to Pedro. That's enough to wake her up with a start. The last thing she wants is to betray Pedro and Camila. She's Hungry for the truth about her real past. Pedro hears her and walks into the bedroom, but she tries to send him away. He's freaked by her emotional state and is sure she's having another crisis. Pedro tells Padre he thinks Mariana is worse and Padre thinks that maybe having her commiteed is the answer.

Now it's Tracy who gets a close-up of Panchito and Doris negotiating in the hallway, but doesn't hear the details. She's bringing a tray of some kind of merienda for Camila and enters, while Camila is thinking it might be The Ant coming back for another crumb from her picnic table. She's not Hungry. She shares with Tracy that she avoided "stuff happening" but how long can she possibly hold out. There, there, comforts Tracy, she'll help her find that vial of poison in the morning, ok?

Another scene back at Tia's apartment. This time it's Elvira and the boys sitting at the dinner table. The boys are Hungry all the time (as if the reception food wasn't enough). Elvira wants to know why they are so quiet. Army says, what does she think they should talk about:

1) Camila spending her wedding night with someone she detests, or

2) How happy Elvira is that Camila scarificed herself so she wouldn't go to jail.

Maria and Manuel are having a romantic dinner together at a very nice restaurant (probably not in Fresno). They are only Hungry for each other. Their soiree is interrupted by a cell phone call from an anxious Pedro. Manuel needs to come right quick, Mariana is worse (IMHO, she seemed perfectly fine, she wanted to be left alone and wouldn't tell Pedro what was troubling her.) Mariana is appealing to the Virgencita (The Sainted Lady is certainly busy tonight) to help her. The more Mariana tries to convince herself she doesn't want to have impure thoughts about Pedro, the less she seems able to resist them--she wants to be with him.

Time has passed, but Panchito and Doris are still arguing over money or tattletales. It's not a matter of money, he claims, it's a matter of wanting Don G to be happy, understand? Doris reasons with him. If he tells, it could cause Don G to have a heart attack and die. Doris puts this thought in his head, if he loves him so much, he wouldn't want him to die, right? Hmm, Panchito's thought process is stuck on Pause. He'll have to think about it. He leaves the scene.

Doris starts to re-enter the Master's Bedroom when Tracy comes upon her. Doris explains that the Don was having a bad night and she was going to fetch him some medicine. (Uh-huh, thinks Tracy to herself.) Once she's gone, Doris hastily does a 180 and heads for her old bedroom, now the New Missus' Bedroom. She gets all up in Camila's face about her robbing her of not only her husband, but her bedroom, too.

Doris wants Camila OUT of El-Alca, tout de suite. When Camila tells her she can't, she wants to know Why The Hell did you marry him, anyway. She answers her own question. If he obligated her, there must be blackmail involved. Well, she says, in any case the two of them cannot live under the same roof. In the one piece of good advice heard today, Doris tells her to leave; leave before she turns into one of them--a Negrete. She speaks from experience; que disfrutas de mi cama (enjoy my bed-but don't think that included her ex-husband).

We cut away to el Major (Doctor) Dummo, talking to Doc-Not II, that he's been contracted to do another well-paying dirty job--perform an abortion ASAP, before the mother-to-be realizes she's pregnant. It's very early in the pregnanacy--about three weeks. Well, ok, Doc-Not II decides, rubbing his hands together, in that case, he can do it., but why does the husband want to get rid of it. The obvious answer, it's not his.

Padre and Pedro talk. Pedro is convinced Camila *must* have had a reason for doing what she's done. >>FF (only because it repeats what we already know). Pedro can't stand the idea of Antonio and Camila together. Padre suggests changing the subject. He suggests talking about Camila as a victim. Victim? Pedro wonders why.

Manuel and Maria show up at El Tal. Manuel is now positive Mariana is exhibiting symptions of Multiple Personality Disorder. He goes up to see her. Mariana, in full control of her capacities is going over events. She doesn't *want* to remember her past. Her fear is coming from inside, fears everywhere, including the fear that Manuel will leave her. He assures her that will never happen. Manuel tries again, she must learn what provoked the loss of her child. Mariana points out that she's lived three different lives (watch out, Mariana, this is only fuel for Manuel's fire)-- 1) as Mariana,; 2) as a homeless beggar on the streets of LA; 3) as Magaly after being rescued by Manuel and his wife. How on earth can she confront her past? Manuel says more therapy. Mariana says he makes it sound so easy.

Meanwhile downstairs, Pedro and Maria talk. She thinks Pedro must be incomodo with her presence in the house (she, a close Elvira-Camila relative). It won't do any good--or bad; as far as he's concerned, *everything* reminds him of Camila. She tells him that she hopes someday, he'll find out all the reasons why this happened to him. Pedro wonders out loud what she meant by this. Pedro suspects that Padre knows, but won't tell. Maria heads upstairs and the two men go to the kitchen to have some tea.

Mariana, in full control of her faculties, has a sensible conversation with Maria about her finding Manuel again and how happy she is for them they reconnected. Maria wonders if Mariana shouldn't go back to Manuel's apartment, in case she goes through another crisis. Mariana thinks it's better to stay put and try to control her dreams.

Tracy is back to talk to Camila. She wants to help. Camila doesn't think anyone can help her. This night has been worse than hell. Antonio left the room in a snit and she's afraid he'll come back and really mean the business end below the Beltbuckle. Tracy then mentions that she looks a little pale. Well, of course she would, after all the upset she's been through, even her stomach has been turning somersaults. This is someone who is NOT Hungry, for sure.

Bro finally remembers Sis and goes for a visit. He realizes that if he's going to win Camila over, he's going to have to give her time. Sissy wants to know why doesn't he take her away from here, go on a real honeymoon, take a cruise. Uh-uh, no can do, because Don G will take advantage of the situation in his absence to try something against them. Lulu thinks that while Bro is trying to woo her, Camila will escape to rendezvous with Pedro. Antonio swears it's never going to happen. First he'd kill her before letting her be with ese Indio. Lucrazzy is ok with him killing her right pronto. No, Antonio is going to make sure she is vigilada (watched) so she can't set foot outside the house. Like a prisoner? How is he going to accomplish that, asks Lucrecia. Easy-peasy; he's going to make her think she's really sick so she'll have to stay in bed. And that is why, she insists on knowing? Camila is preggers. Lulu freaks *out*. That Bruja (witch) managed to conseguir (get) what Lulu couldn't lograr (achieve). Pedro can't find out. From the look on her face, no one should be surprised if she takes matters into her own hands.

Avances: Don G and Pedro, out riding on horseback, in the middle of the night. A shot rings out--we see Don G with a shotgun (or rifle, whatever) and Pedro is hit (probably a flesh wound to the shoulder). Will this be enough to embolden Camila to disobey Antonio and rush to Pedro's side? Tracy, girl, get hoppin' this is your opportunity to help--everything depends on you finding out about the shooting and letting Camila know (well, this last scene didn't happen in the avances, but it Should). Tune in tomorrow for another exciting hour presented by Cool-Ade Beanie-Time.

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Monday, May 28, 2012

Abismo de pasión #55 5/28/12: Shotgun wedding-Ur doing it rong

El Refrito
  • Elisa and Dam visit Steffie's grave (Note to Dam: first thing you need to do is buy a proper headstone for Steffie.)
  • Alf visits Sr. Cat Food and he throws her out.
Lo Nuevo
Pre-wedding jitters
  • IrritatING wants to know where her necklace is. Gabino comes baring better gifts (Down, Cyn): pearl earrings. Yes, they are real, ING makes sure of that. Gross, ING licks the earring back before she puts in in her ear. Gab thinks that once ING has her share of the Arango fortune they can buy whatever they want. ING reminds Gab that Gael won’t even see her. (Dear maquillaje/peinado please get ING a new “Luke.” Pink lipstick circa 1964 and the payot do nothing for her.) They need to come up with a way to make Gael worried about her and want to see her. 
  • Assgu discusses the current Elisa problem with Carmina. She reminds him Elisa and Dam are siblings. It would be grody to the max if they got married. The Orange One thinks Elisa needs to know, but Assgu doesn’t think so. Besides, Elisa would just ask for proof...which he burned. 
  • Gab pays a visit to Padre Lupe and asks for Gael’s whereabouts. He claims he’s looking on behalf of an ill Ingrid. He tells Padre that he and Ingrid are not really so close anymore since Ingrid didn’t want to be seen with the likes of him. According to Gab, she didn’t want Gael to be ashamed of her for hanging out with scum. Gab plays like he doesn’t know who Gael’s dad is. Padre Lupe informs Gab that Gael has left the building.
  • ING goes to visit Kenia at la casa rosa. They snipe at each other about who’s the bigger crook (ratero(a): petty thief.) Mom wants to know if Kenia told Gael about having a sister. She did. ING wants Kenia’s help in getting the Arango fortune and offers half of the money Fina paid her. Kenia accepts and demands the pearls too. At first ING balks, but eventually gives in after Kenia tells her that when Gael finds out he’s an Arango she will convince Gael NOT to share the fortune with ING. ING gives up the pearls as an advance payment (adelanto) and tells her they belonged to a dead woman. Oh this is going to get interesting. Look up, Kenia! There’s an anvil with your name on it! ING will give up the cash later. First she needs Kenia to tell Gael she is very ill and to help convince Gael to accept her. 
  • Sweet scene with Horacio and Lola. He asks her to be his novia. She’ll think about it. Chaste kiss and a pan over to the Brown Recluse from hell. Scary beech is scary. Inside, Lola admits to Elisa that Horacio is a suitor (pretendiente.) Girl talk. OOOPS! Lola is still has Horacio’s jacket on. She will run to catch up with him so she can see that the brown recluse managed to get from Casa Castigo to the center of town in no time. Broomstick, crutches…same difference. Carmina threatens to tell Lola that Horacio is a murderer if he doesn’t get the plane tickets from Gab. Horacio refuses, but Carmina says he’ll do it if he doesn’t want her to tell everything to Lola. At which point Lola walks up and says “What does she know about you Horacio?” I am also instituting a personal “she who shall not be named” rule for my recaps (like I had to do with Maripaz in LFDD.) Cheat-ho will henceforth be: HOMABFH-hobbling, orange mean-a$$ beech from hell.
  • After the commercial, HOMABFH makes like her "big info" is that Horacio is friends with Gabino...which is apparently enough for Lola. She throws his jacket back at him and leaves. HOMAB (FH optional) tells Horacio to rethink doing the little favor for her.
  • Assgu comes to Elisa and tells her that she and Dam can't be together. Elisa asks him to please stop blaming them for what happened. Assgu tells her he doesn't want her with Dam and they don't know what he's capable of.
  • Dam arrives home to a Faking Fina. She claims her blood pressure is acting up thanks to his news about Elisa. Doesn't give a Dam tells her to take her meds and rest. He's done with her using her health as blackmail. Fina flashes back to a conversation with young Dam in which he tells her he wishes he was an orphan like Gael.
  • Enrique moves in with Doc Dad.
  • HOMAB arrives home and Lola is a little suspicious that she knows so much about Horacio's and Gab's social lives. HOMAB claims that she got into Lola's bidnez because if Lola is going to be friends with low-lifes, HOMAB has to protect her hogar from them. 
  • Gab returns home to Ingrid to report Gael's nowhereabouts. Ingrid mentions her visit to Kenia. Gab knows immediately that Kenia milked her mom for cash. ING flips and Gab says he will look for Gael. He can't be hard to find. Gael really only has agricultural skills.
  • Lupe and Kenia exchange notes and discover neither of them knows where Gael is.
  • Don Lucio visits Doc Toofar at the Only Inn. Lucio wants a rush on the blood tests. Doc will go to Merida personally. Lucio tells him the secret wedding is at 12 so get those results STAT.
  • Tonia visits Gab and tells him to stay away from Vicente. Methinks Gab suspects Vicente is his. "He's not your son. He has my temperament."
  • Be-gone-ya visits Alf to be up front about Quique's visit to the DF. She also tells Fina about seeing Dam and Elisa at the Only Inn. They were visiting Doc who wrote orders for some medical tests. Blabby hag. Alf immediately calls Gab and tells him to investigate what tests were ordered and why. I love how Gab is all "I'm Mister Man" until Alf starts barking.
  • HOMAB goes to see Paolo at the office (ridculous place to look for him, hon) and runs into Gab...who flaps his gums about the medical tests. He just wants to warn her since, you know, she FAKED the last tests.
  • Don Lucio visits Padre Lupe. Padre is worried about Gael. Lucio tells Padre about the civil wedding since Padre didn't marry them. Lucio says Padre didn't support them. Padre says he supports them, but they are being hasty and he doesn't like them being secretive. Wow, Lucio recognizes they are adults and tells Padre he should be supporting Dam. Padre asks about that thing Lucio needed to confirm. Lucio has faith he will get the info he needs before the wedding. He tells Padre he should go to show family support. The secret wedding is at 12.
Wedding Day
  • Elisa is ecstatic, Lola not so much. Lola is sad because Elisa's marriage means Lola's reason for living is no more. Elisa won't need her to care for her any more. Tears and tenderness. Elisa says Lola will come with her after she marries, but Lola doesn't want to be an estorbo (nuisance.)
  • Sabrina visits Quique FF>>
  • Gab reports his findings to Fina: it was a pre-nuptial work up. When Fina asks if Dam is at the Pro Ce Sa Do Ra Tonia lets her know that Dam and Braulio left very early, but she doesn't think they went to the Pro Ce. Braulio was too dressed up and perfumed for that.
  • Assgu receives a phone call on his ancient telephone.
Registro Civil
  • The wedding party is gathering. Dam says Lucio is making him nervous. Elisa finally arrives and her boobies are modestly covered. For a minute Dam thought she has changed her mind. She suddenly realizes she's forgotten her amulet. Lola and Paloma tell her to chill. It's not that important. Lucio is more than willing to stall go back and get it. The judge gets things started. Damian's full name: Damian Arango Mondragon  (recognize the name, LFDD fans?) Oh brother, Lucio doesn't have his ID and won't be able to sign. Padre Lupe to the rescue!!! He's arrived and with ID!
  • Doc Toofar is suddenly at the Registro as well. He's got the test results and oddly HOMAB is also there waiting...just like a spider. She grabs the envelope from the distracted Doc and shoves it in her shirt with her boobs. He demands the envelope back and it's about this time that Assgu shows up...with a shotgun.
  • Dam and Elisa are both there of their own free will....and Assgu interrupts with his shotgun. Everyone tries to calm him down. Elisa will leave with him right now! Padre tells him to calm down and even strikes a Christ-like pose. Padre almost succeeds, but Assgu is determined. Struggle, BANG!!! Dam grabs his crotch...no, no... sorry, it's a femoral artery shot. Everyone stands around. No one calls the ambulance. Credits.
Avances
  • Tragedy!
  • Every minute counts!
  • Seconds are crucial!

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Refugio Para el Amor #5-6 Mon 5/28/12 Lorenzo is sad that nobody has died yet.


Our heroine is getting the hell out of Dodge via the train. Coincidentally, of course, our guero Rodrigo is going on the same train. They are attracted to each other. She gets on (second class), so does he (first class). (He has fancy food, she has an apple.)

The train stops. Rodrigo gets off and rushes back to find Luciana in coach. He mouths, "Come have coffee with me and talk?" She isn't getting off, though. He gets deluxe transport to his home, but she commences a long, long journey by trolley and bus etc. to what is going to be approximately the same place he's going, right?  She carries her handy picture of the Virgin Mary under her arm.

Luciana's mother looks at a picture of her husband, his tractor, and their daughter Luci. "They've both left us," she moans to her son Lorenzo, who says Luciana will be back.

So the deal with Violeta is, she's told her mother Magda (who lives in the pueblo and is best buds with Luciana's mother) that she's a night nurse. Really, though, she works at an antro, which could be a bar, a dive, a hole, let us call it a Den of Iniquity and its name is "Hell."

Rodrigo's dad doesn't seem to like him. He blames him for the accident which has left Pat crippled. Yes, Ezra, ALREADY the hospital!! Max the father is angry at everyone. The mother Rosalena(?) is mad at her husband - he taught their sons to love danger. The priest tells her Rodrigo needs love and tolerance and patience.

Patricio is crabby and doesn't want his dinner. He feels like a piece of furniture. Downstairs, the arrival of Connie (the mom's sister) and her son Aldo, cousin to Rod and Pat. Aldo wants to see Pat. The mom says Pat is "nervous." She feels very sorry for - her own self. "Why does God do this to ME?" she hyperventilates.

A newspaper is delivered to Rod and Pat's dad Max, the cover story is on the brothers' accident. Max is furious. He yells at Gala, their publicist. Turns out it was Gala's (update: mom) Julieta that leaked the story.

The cranky mother informs us that because Gala is divorced, if she's to marry into the family she must procure an annulment so there can be a proper church wedding.

I'm going to introduce you to a Yiddish term, "het," which means far away, and "het het" means really out in the boonies. So I deem Luciana's hometown to be "het het." Het het, the market gossip is that Luciana has gone far away. (Note that from her village's point of view, the big city is "het het.") Nobody knows where. Procopio (the villain's stooge) reports this.

The villain orders the stooge to go spy on Lorenzo (Luciana's brother) and his dumb buddy. They're easy to spot, they are always hanging out in front of the funeral parlor hopefully waiting for somebody to die. Lorenzo's friend is amazed Luciana has gone off to the capital (shh don't tell anybody). Everything is big there! That friend is a dim bulb. He's going to spill the beans.

Rodrigo tells his grumpy brother Pat: "I've gotten engaged to Gala, but I'm not very happy about it because of you." "Marry, have your family, go forward while I'll just lie here. Enjoy life since you can. I don't blame you, it could have been you instead of me."

Gala is mad at her friend Julieta (who played an annoying upper-class diva in HQDNS) for leaking the story. Juli wants Gala to marry as fast as possible. I don't know why she cares because the subtitles quit while the explanation rolled.

We are reminded that Luciana's dying father said to her: "Seek your destiny, seek Rosa Torres." "Who is Rosa Torres?" Luciana muses.

The aunt can't cheer Pat up by talking baseball. Brigida the housekeeper is scary. Pat throws Brigida out when she asks what he wants for dinner. He doesn't like Brigida. He says of the young sprightly Jana, "She's a free soul, she shouldn't take care of me." Is he not her "real" brother?

Luciana: still traveling! A taco guy gives her direx and a free taco. It's a full moon in Mexico again! Luciana gets to Violeta's house but nobody answers. She sits on the stoop to wait.

Big dinner at the big house, Gala and Julieta invited themselves in order to make the Gala/Rod engagement public and seal the deal. The mother is definitely not happy to be hearing the big news this way.

Luciana is sleeping on the stoop when a drunk woman in sparkly high heels and a sparkly red dress arrives. It's Violeta. She does NOT look like a night nurse. Though I believe she ministers to men in the night. She opens the door, Luciana is appalled to see the mess. Violeta, very happy to see Luciana, says the night nurse job was invented to get her mother off her back. Actually she works in a den of iniquity.

Luciana tells Vi the sad story of everything getting stolen by the evil boss (who at that moment is wearing a fabulous satin robe with a purple hem, drinking on his bed, vowing to steal Luciana back). Next morning Luciana has cleaned everything up like Cinderella and has coffee and donuts for her hungover friend. Then she goes out to find work.

Rodrigo tells his brother Pat about seeing the cute Norteno girl again. Pat says he'd have liked to have seen her again too.

The angry dad scolds Rodrigo some more for Pat's accident which left him a guinapo (a rag, a wreck). The angry mom doesn't want to have fun with her friend, she wants to stay home and sulk.

Het het: the stooge runs to tell his villainous boss: "I saw Lorenzo and his dumb friend talking about Luciana's arrival." The boss deduces that Efren the grocer knows where the little dove is.

Paz (Luci's mom) tells Magda (Violeta's mom): "When my Luciana was born we were working in a rich woman's house and she gave me these fine clothes that her children had outgrown." The friend asks follow-up questions but Paz immediately falls off her stool and breaks her hand.

In the airplane hanger Max tells Rod's friend, with no air of happiness, that he's spent 36 years married to the same woman. Rod's friend thinks fidelity is too hard.

Luciana attends a pep rally for wannabe perfume salespeople. When it turns out each applicant must pay 1000 pesos as an "investment" she speaks up angrily and leaves - I approved of the PSA (that this sort of gig is a crock). Then she almost finds work with a nice guy in a little food place but the guy's mother throws her out, I didn't catch why.

Fourth night in a row it's a full moon. Violeta to Luciana: "Borrow my clothes and work for my boss!" Luci doesn't want to. Violeta's next idea is that Luci go back home, marry the evil old dude, and wait for him to die. "Take advantage of the situation!"

Intimate dinner, Rod and Gala. He wants at least four children; she wants it to be "just be you and me" and nags about a date for the wedding.

Luciana looks for work some more.

Pat is not eating. Max is contracting changes to the house to make it accessible for a wheelchair.

Luci discovers she won't get work as a maid without references. Also, she is too pretty to get work where there are men living!

A priest Honesto cames to see Pat. First the mom complains about Jana, "she's poorly brought up and rowdy." Then Pat complains: "Where was God when I had my accident?" "At your side - that's why you're here with your family that loves you." sez the priest.

Het het: Lorenzo is annoyed nobody has died, that's a problem when you're in the funeral business. The friend wants them to go on a trip to the capital. The stooge is spying.

Violeta pushes hard and Luciana finally agrees to go see Vi's boss. There's work cleaning the bathroom? or attending the ladies in the bathroom? Anyway, when the boss sees Luci (he looks her over fore and aft) he gives her work attending tables instead. She gets a wig and a lot of makeup and a tiny little red satin outfit. And what do you know, here come Rod and his buddies and fiance for a night at "Inferno." Luci and Rod stare at each other. I can't believe he recognizes her.

Tomorrow we have no recapper unless somebody steps up. Ezra will blog on Wednesday.

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Sunday, May 27, 2012

El Talismán #83 Fri 5/25/12 The Prince of Darkness and The Sacrificial Lamb, and Who You Callin' Crazy?

 

I imagine that to you every incident is as clear as if it was yesterday, like a ghost that never goes away. M. Hercule Poirot

Today on El Talisman:

The Prince of Darkness is asking Cameela, the scarifical lamb, if she is feeling better. She says she is.

Doris has gone to see Brigitte and tells her, well if Pigorio can make a fake will, I will do a fake marriage.

Pedro and Mariana have gone to the hospital to see Manuel. Manuel and Maria are still together in his office, and Manuel wants to know what happened to her face. He is all kinds of verklempt. She says, beleive it or not, I think Lucrazy smacked the crap out of me. (Note to Manuel: She is speaking the truth, listen with an open mind, stop looking at her as if she has lost her mind). Manuel asks her if she remembers anything about the attacker, like maybe hair, a face, anything? (Note to Manuel: Dude you weren't listening to her. The undead Lucrazy bashed your daughter jus' sayin'). Maria is not liking him badgering Mariana, so she takes Mariana away to treat her for the blood on her face, and the swelling. Pedro and Manuel are alone, and Pedro says he is glad, he wants to talk to him, without Mariana being in the room. Manuel wants to know what Mariana told Pedro about what happened. Pedro tells Manuel that from the description Mariana gave to Pedro, it fits Lucrazy, but, wait for it, she's dead. See quote above.



Speaking of crazy people, Lucrazy is tearing up the cabana, throwing furniture, trying to tear the blinds off the windows she keeps yelling ayuda mi, listen to me, to the air around her. Valentin, having been banished to find herbs, is walking around in a foul mood, just happens to hear this voice. He is very curious and takes a small tree log and starts to the cabana. (Note to Valentin: Dude run, do not go there, stay away, you'll be sorry). See quote above. So Valentin is still hearing the voice, goes to the door, and breaks it open with the small tree log. He is not believing what he is seeing and stares with big bug eyes at Lucrazy standing there looking just as dumb struck. (Note to Valentin: Told ya dude, now just back away slowly and keep that tree log with you or you'll be sorry).

Back at the wedding from hell, the sacrificial lamb, Cameela, has signed the papers and now she is, wait for it, Senora Prince of Darkness, or in other words The Princess of All That is Lost. The Negrete cousin comes and congratulates her, and of course the Virus is at Cameela's elbow making sure that Cameela observes the proper etiquette. (Note to the Sacrificial Lamb, listen chica, faint again, it's your only way out). Also the Pig has gotten Cameela alone and tells her she should have been the lover of the Prince of Darkness, not his wife.

Meanwhile, back at the cabana, poor Valentin looks like he will have an infarto. He is freaking out, thinking he is seeing a ghost. He keeps saying you aren't real, I am not seeing dead people, keep repeating that dude, maybe she will disappear, jus' sayin'. Lucrazy tells him she isn't dead. He drops the small log in his anxiety, and is kinda, sorta in shock. She tells him NOT to tell anyone she is alive. Well, Valentin wants to go tell the Pig right away she is alive, he turns his back to her (Note to Valentin: Didn't I warn you dude? You should have backed out slowly with that small log, jus' sayin') ,and she hits him over the head and knocks him out cold.

Flor is still not happy about the marriage,and Angel talks to her. He knows about her parents being divorced of course, and tells Flor his parents are divorced too and they have that in common. They are so liking each other. Army comes and talks with them, and laments he hasn't been able to talk to Fabi yet. Flor lets him know she doesn't have her cell phone. They will have to try the internet. He tells Flor he got a job and intends on seeing Fabi soon. Flor finally forgives Army for the stunt her pulled on her and is happy that Fabi and he are novios. The Prince of Darkness comes up and wants a hug and congrats from her, but she doesn't do it. He asks her if she wants to be with her sister in banishment? She is sooo down with that.

Manuel and Pedro still talking about what happened to Mariana. Mariana is confused. She must be, why would she being seeing a dead person? Pedro tells him it sure sounded like Lucrazy, but she's dead. Pedro says this would be what Lucrazy would do if she were alive, but she's dead. (Listen dudes: Mariana is sane, and y'all are crazy, jus' sayin'. And Manuel shame on you! She's your daughter, check it out, Valentin can vouch for Mariana jus' sayin'). He tells Manuel it wasn't Cameela that attacked Mariana, and he can't think of another woman that would do this to Mariana, so why would another woman attack Mariana? In the stupiest diagnosis ever, Manuel wonders if Mariana has, wait for it, Mutiple Personality Disorder!!! (Note to Manuel: That's it!!! You are dead to me. Are you listening to yourself? Check out her story first, before you think she is crazy, jus' sayin'. Talk to Valentin.) Manuel tells Pedro that due to her amnesia and her lapses in memory this could have happened. Pedro, at least, doesn't seem to buy this. Pedro says she had a happy childhood, her father took very good care of her, and so did Pedro. Manuel says he will contact a collegue of his that specializes in this disorder. Manuel also tells Pedro he feels that Mariana is still in love with him. Pedro says, well I've told you and told you, you listening Manuel, I only feel brotherly toward Mariana. Then Manuel says I wonder which woman loves you, Magaly, who may have fallen in love with you in the here and now, or Mariana from mistaken memories of the past? Pedro tells him, no matter what, he isn't in love with either of them, just in a brotherly way. Manuel tells Pedro, maybe Mariana can stay with you at El Tal for awhile, maybe something will jog her memory. Pedro says he will think about it.

Meanwhile, the undead Lucrazy, has trussed Valentin up like the Thanksgiving turkey. She keeps saying, wake up now, wake up. Valentin finally comes to. She gets in his face, still holding the log mind you, and says I can't beleive, you beleive in ghosts. She says yeah I'm dead, but not crazy. (Note to Lucrazy: Haven't you pummeled enough people today? Isn't your blood lust satisified for the day? You SHOULD be dead, jus' sayin'). She is still holding that log. She asks him why did you come here? Say What??? You were yelling like the hounds of hell were at your feet, just saying. You want to gossip about me, Right, RIGHT??? He is moaning and crying on the floor and she hits him in the legs with that log.

Maria treats Mariana for her injuries. Mariana asks her if she knows Pedro? Maria says only through Cameela, and not well. Maria tells Mariana that Pedro and Cameela were so happy until now. She doesn't go into details. Mariana says she just wants her memory back. And Maria tells her to trust Manuel. (Note to Mariana: Listen girl, find a better doctor, or better yet, go see El Capitan, I think he will actually look into your beating, jus' sayin').

Tracy, Geno, and Cameela are in a room at Alcatrash talking about this farce of a marriage. Oh, I have to say (Note to Tracy: Have you been to see Miss Clairol, or maybe Messrs Revlon, Garnier, Freida or perhaps Madame L'Oreal? Your hair is much lighter and actually adds a glow to your face, along with that lipstick.) They want to know exactly why the Sacrificial Lamb has married the Prince of Darkness? She spills all the frijoles. They ask her if she has some kind of plan. Of course the sacrificial lamb don't got no plan. They tell Cameela, you know he is brutal and muy peligroso, ya think. Tracy says you can yell for help. (Note to Julia: chica you got a lock that can be busted open by Tracy? Jus' sayin'). (Note to Cameela: Did you remember the superglue? I hope you did. You are gonna need it.). Cameela with the deer in the headlights look, thanks them for being such good friends. Tracy leaves, but Geno stays and here comes the Prince of Darkness. He wants Cameela out there with the guests, so Geno, giving the Prince of Darkness the death ray, leaves with Cameela, the sacrificial lamb, and the Prince of Darkness. Of course, Cameela runs into the Virus of a mama, and she wants to know why Cameela isn't resting. (Note to Virus: You keep pushing it, LET IT GO!). Cameela has that deer in the headlights look again. Army comes to Cameela and asks if she is ok? Cameela says she is naseous and Army says it is probably stress from all she has been through. He tells her she is not alone and he will do anything to help her. She thinks about Pedro and wishes she could have told him everything. Geno and Tomas are now sitting with Cameela and tell her if she needs anything, like say, HELP, they are right there, next door, at El Tal. Cameela says she is afraid to be alone with the Prince of Darkness and what comes after that. Geno has a great idea! You're sick right, RIGHT! Use that. (Oh, sure, sure, you know how the Prince of Darkness is).



Doris is still at M. Brigette's in her old room, and in comes, wait for it, the arranger of fake wills and marriages, Lucas. She tells him she wants him to arrange a fake marriage for her to Pigorio, and he says yeah sure, but what do I get out of it? She proceeds to apply her en flagrante skills on him.

Now we have the Prince of Darkness talking to fake Doc, whose name is, wait for it, Jaime. He asks Doc Jaime if Cameela could be, you know, PREGGERS? Of course, Doc Jaime doesn't know for sure but it could be a possiblity. He now has the deer in the headlights look. Doc Jaime says she will have to take a test, to know for sure. Of course this wasn't in the Prince of Darkness' planes, he curses Pedro again and calls him an indio, and again CAMEELA ES MIO. He tells fake doc Jaime not to breathe a word to anyone.

The Diablo Pig is seeing the Virus alone, so he goes over to talk to her. He says she has so much ambition, to be selling her daughter out, and she will NOT see a penny of his fortune. The Virus, we all know how she is full of sweetness and light, NOT, tells the Pig all she cares about it the happiness of her daughter. (Note to Virus: I get the distinct impression that the Pig cares more about your daughter than YOU do.).

In their en flagrante afterglow, Lucas and Doris are eating a snack and talking about the fake wedding. He tells her whenever she wants to hold this "fake wedding" he's her man and just to let him know. She tells him she will be the Duena of Alcatrash.

Pig and his fake doc, Jaime, are talking and the Pig wants to know what the heck is wrong with Cameela? You are MIO DOCTORCITO, is that clear? Jaime says it is. Pig walks off and here comes the Virus. She wants to know why Jaime is passing himself off as a doc now. Isn't he really a major domo? He gives her some poppycock story. She isn't buying it. She wants the truth, he says you can't handle the truth, not really, but you get the gist. She isn't believing a word of it. He says he is here to take care of the Pig and his heart (ya know the one where it is TEN sizes too small). He excuses himself and leaves.

Fake doc Jaime is outside and freaking out. He calls Rennie, and lets him know, wait for it, the Virus KNOWS who he is, cause he ran into her at Cameela's wedding to the Prince of Darkness, and what shall he do, what shall he say? Jaime says he is afraid the Virus will out him to the Pig. Rennie tells him to be calm and just go with the flow. It is business after all. He asks Rennie for help. Rennie gets off the phone with Jaime and Rita has heard everything is is pithed off. He says now that Virus knows they will have to do business with her. Well Rita is so not down with that. She blames him for marrying the Virus, and all for, wait for it, EL CHEQUE ES MIO. Rennie says you know why I married her, for moola of course. She leaves the room and Rennie curses the Virus.

Tonio has cornered the fake Doc Jaime again. He looks like he wants to hurl. He wants him to contact another doctor, about the Cameela problem. He calls a friend of his named Raymundo, Raymundo will take care of it. (Oh, please, let Raymundo have an ounce of scruples). Jaime tells the Prince of Darkness that Raymundo was a doctor, but due to his drug problem, lost his license. Well there goes my hope of scruples. The Prince of Darkness leaves, and fake Doc Jaime examines the Pig and tells him, hey you are doing great, BP is fine, you are swell. Doris has been in the alcove in his room, back from her en flagrante with Lucas, and is watching them. Pig thanks the fake doc, and turns his attention to Doris. He tells her he wants her, yewwww, if you only knew where she has been, jus' sayin' They smoochy, (Note to Doris: Did you at least take a bath, and you got your Listerine? Jus' sayin').

Mariana has packed her bags, cause evidently Pedro has agreed for her to come stay at El Tal for awhile. Manuel tells her Pedro is expecting her and everything is fine. She has a question for him. You believe me don't you? Some did try to whack me. I'm not crazy, am I? I know a woman tried to whack me. Manuel doesn't say anything. (Note to Manuel: You are dead to me until you get your head out of , well you know). Pedro greets Mariana when she gets to El Tal, he tells her Mi Casa es su Casa. He has installed her in her old room. He tells her little by little she will start to remember. He bids her goodnight and he'll see her in the morning.

The Prince of Darkness finally gets to the cabana and sees the fiasco that Lucrazy has created, with Valentin still trussed up like the Thanksgiving Turkey and he is moaning. She has stopped harassing Valentin, on the Prince of Darkness' arrival, and begs him to forgive her. She was so afraid Valentin would tell on her, nanny nanny, boo boo. She was by herself, doncha know, time on her hands etc. He releases Valentin from the tressing, and swears him to silence. Valentin swears. The Prince of Darkness tells Lucrazy, I can see if you did this to Panchito (Oh, please not Panchito, who deserves a wayyyy better familia than you) but not Valentin. She tells the Prince of Darkness that she saw Mariania with Pedro es mio, and just went crazy, please forgive her. (Note to Lucrazy: Enough is enough already, the Prince of Darkness needs to drag your crazy ass to the nearest manicomio, jus' sayin'). She says you are married to Cameela now, what about poor little me? He tells her not to worry she will get what she wants. He is SO with her. Oh, yeah , right, sure, sure.

Now everyone has left the infernal reception and the Prince of Darkness, escorts the sacrificial lamb to their new abode. (Note to Julia: Hey chica did you notice the keypad on the wall of that room? Wonder if it has a panic button and if the Sacrificial Lamb will use it? Jus' sayin'). He has a big whiskey in his hand. She mistakenly thinks this is her room. He corrects her and says this is OUR ROOM. We will be sleeping in the same bed and getting en flagrante as soon as possible! You are my espousa and this is the wedding night after all. Cameela, the sacrificial lamb, looks like she wants to hurl. She tells him, sueltme. She says I am your wife, clearly, but I am so not down with sleeping with your butt, not really, but you know she is thinking it, much less wanting to get en flagrante with you. By this time he has got her by the neck, and she is yelling she doesn't love him, never will. He tells her that he loves her, adores her, all his love is hers, yuck. He starts grabbing her face and kissing her neck, and face. She is screaming. (Note to Cameela, you ever take self defense classes? A good kick in the avacadoes will work. Also see that keypad over there? Maneouver his butt over there and push that button, jus' sayin').

We had various thought bubbles, Cameela thinking of Pedro, Pedro thinking of Cameela, Mariana thinking of the beat down she got from Lucrazy.

Domatilla, Margarito, and Santiago are having dinner together and Santiago is loving the food here. Domatilla tells him she got the recipe from Tracy, and Santiago likes it cause it reminds him of his Mama's cooking. They are trying to legally get her to the States, so she can see Santiago. He is very happy. Pedro comes in and tells them Mariana is the house guest for awhile.

Lunes on El Talisman:

I didn't see the advances. My tape cut off.

Labels:


Refugio Para el Amor #3-4 Fri 5/25/12 Grief, Kidnapping and Eviction



The Old:

Don Aquiles tells the family the house and lands are now his. He says Galindo promised Luciana's hand in marriage. She tells him to get out and never come back.

The New:

At the hospital, the doctor informs Rosalena and Maximo that Patricio may now be a quadropalegic and has lost sensation in his limbs and arms. The family is devestated. Rodgrigo is feeling the worst and continues to blame himself.

The chisme ladies are just yapping about Luciana and Don Aquiles, and one of them comes up to Luciana and says, come on marry the guy. Your young he has lots of dinero, and hey you could help your family out. Well Magda tells the chisme lady to get lost and tells Luciana don't ever listen to those chisme ladies. Your father never would have said that to Don Aquiles and Don Aquiles is a big fat liar. Don Aquiles had gone back to his office, shows the papers to his henchman, Copio, and tells him he IS marrying Luciana like it or not.

Rosalena has called Nana Matilda from the hospital and tells her Patricio's condition. Nana is truly upset. Bridiga is there and Nana relays the news to her, and all Bridiga can say is oh, hey, more work for me. I swear she is Mrs. Danvers.

Maximo is not pleased with what the doctors have told him. He wants better doctors for his son and he tells Gala and Rosalena this. He feels he may have a better chance of recuperating. They all go in to see Patricio one by one and tell him they want him to get better.

Back at the puebla, Lorenzo thanks the funeral director for everything he did to give his Papa a proper send off. He asks the funeral director for a job. He actually gives him a job, but now Lorenzo will have to give up school. A little later, the owner of the funeral home is dressed in vacation clothes and tells Lorenzo to take good care of the business cause he is going to Acapulco on vacation.

Paz, Magda, and Luciana are going through all their bills. Luciana vows they will pay every cent they owe, specially to Don Aquiles, no matter how long it takes. Speak of the devil here he comes and Luciana tells him she will pay back every cent her Papa owed to him little by little. He tells her well this bill is not small. You also have to pay me for the lands, and house. You'll never have enough to pay me back. So if you can't pay the amount in full by tomorrow you will face eviction.

Back at the hospital, the Doctor informs the family that Patricio has opened his eyes and regained conciousness. Maximo goes in to talk to him and tells him he had an accident on the mountain. He goes back to the waiting room and the doctor tells the family that Patricio had no complications during surgery and will be able to start therapy tomorrow. Rosalena wants to know who is going to tell Patricio about his condition. The doctor also tells the family that Patricio may get some sensation back, but how long, and how much sensation he doesn't know yet. Since Patricio has woken up, Rodrigo will go in to tell him what happened. He tells him he had an accident on the mountain and what happened. He remembers falling but not much else. Rodrigo cries and begs Patricio to forgive him. Patricio cries too. The family wants to know how Patricio took the news. Rodrigo tells them that Patricio is as well as can be expected and to go home.

Back in puebla, Magda and Paz are talking about Don Aquiles. How horrible and miserable he is. Paz is hating it cause she owes him so much money. Magda says her daughter, Violetta, works in Mexico City, and she sends money to Magda that she saves. She gives this money to Paz. Paz doesn't want to take it, but Magda insists. Paz thanks her and cries.

Julietta, Gala's mama, and her friend are having drinks. They are talking about Maximo and possible fraud and prison time. I think they are talking about Maximo and his business may be in trouble.

Max, Rodrigo, Gala and bodyguard leave the hospital and the press is out in full force wanting to know the details of what happened to Patricio. They get in the car quickly and don't answer any questions. When they get home, Roddy takes a shower and cries.

In the puebla, Luciana is packing up some of cermanic pots to sell at market. She is selling some, when Don Aquile's henchman, Copio comes and under sells her. She is livid and grabs his megaphone. He keeps saying orders are orders. One of the men in the market comes and grabs the megaphone so they stop fighting, but when he sees who the megaphone belongs to he gives it back to Copio. Ariche to the rescue, takes the megaphone and he and his friends play hide the megaphone. They end up breaking it. Luciana goes back to Dona Alberta's, she runs the local store, to see if she can sell some pots in her store, but Copio has already warned her not to, orders of Don Aquiles, she tells her she can't, Luciana has figured out who did this. Copio goes back to Don Aquiles and tells him what happened. Don Aquiles laughs and likes her spunk. Lucy brings her pots home and is very discouraged. Ariche says maybe you'll run into that guy from the jeep. Luciana smiles as she thinks about Rodrigo.

The next day, Luciana has decided to go to San Pablo de los Angeles with Ariche to sell some of her pots there. They get off the bus there and run into Marcella a woman on the bus. They ask where the market is, I think, but Marcella I think tells them they are too late. They ask for directions and Marcella goes with them.

At the hosptial, Rodrigo is going with Patricio who is being transferred back to Mexico City. There is the press again, and one of them takes a pic of Patricio on the stretcher. Rodrigo grabs the camera and smashes it and asks if the guy has no shame? The guy says he is only doing his job.

Luciana, Marcella and Airche are in a park waiting. Ariche is hungry and needs something to drink. Luciana goes across the street to buy some drinks and as she comes out of the little store, a big black SUV comes and she is shoved into it, screaming. Ariche runs after the SUV along with Marcella. They contact the police. Ariche says it was Don Aquiles that did it. He tells the police so. The police ask Marcella if she is related to Ariche. She says no, so he has to go with the police. Marcella waves good-bye. Luciana's box of pots is still there.

Meanwhile in the SUV, Don Aquiles has gagged Luciana, and bound her hands behind her back. He finally takes the gag off, and tells her he is marrying her and she better get used to it. His henchman Copio is driving laughing like a hyena, and Don Aquiles is in the back seat with Luciana petting her hair, as if she is a dog. (Note to Luciana: This guy is truly unhinged, run Chica run as fast as you can, as soon as he unties you, jus' sayin'). She says what he has done is illegal and she is telling the cops. He says go ahead, but YOU'LL be the one in jail.

Paz has told Lorenzo that Luciana went to San Pablo to sell some pots to pay bills.

The rest of the family leaves the hospital with the press chasing them too. They don't answer any questions.

Don Aquiles takes Luciana to his house. She keeps telling him to suelteme. He tells her she'll soon be Senora Aquiles. He takes her upstairs to a bedroom where a wedding dress with veil is waiting for her. She tells him she'll die before she becomes Senora Aquiles. She is freaked out. He leaves her there and locks the door. Copio has come in the room and tells her to marry Aquiles. He unties her hands and tells her to put on the wedding gown. She asks him if she were his sister, would he do this to her? He leaves the room and locks the door. She throws something at the wedding dress.

Ariche has gone to Luciana's house and tells her family what happened. The police along with the Commandante of the puebla go to Don Aquiles house to see if Luciana is there.

Don Aquiles is already dressed for the wedding and has a judge there already. He sends Copio up to get Luciana, who has not only not changed, but is giving the Don the death ray. Judge starts the ceremony and Don Aquiles is trying to rush him through. When the judge asks Luciana if she accepts, she says no. Don Aquiles signs the paperwork, but Luciana doesn't. Someone knocks on the door and Luciana screams for help. It's Luciana's family and the police and Commandante. The judge says this was no ceremony and leaves. Luciana tells Paz and Magda that Don A tried to force her to marry him. Commandante arrests Don Aquiles. When they go outside with Don A in handcuffs all the people are cheering, everyone in town hates him. He is in jail and the Commandate treats him like a king. He has brought him a nice dinner and a bucket with ice and beer. He releases him.

Meanwhile back in Mexico City, Patricio has made it home. They have done up a special room for him but he doesn't want that, he wants to go back to his old room. Bridiga is not happy, because, she had to do soooo much work on that new room. Nana is just happy her nino is home and alive. She tells Bridiga that too.

Lorenzo and his friends check out the burned field. His friend tells him the fire was started by gasoline. Lorenzo is pithed. Lorenzo goes home and Paz tells him what happened to Luciana. He wants to kill Don A. Paz talks him out of it.

Luciana has a nightmare about what happened. She wakes up, upset.

In Mexico City, Rodrigo assures Patricio he will take care of him. Hanna comes in too, opens the curtains to let the sun in, and tries to feed Patricio. He doesn't want anything.

Rodrigo goes to church and cries. The Padre asks if he can help him. He tells the Padre he feels responsible and feels horrible. He asks God why him and not me. Padre tells him God has given him a second chance and he needs to be strong for his brother.

In the puebla, Luciana is packing some of her pots, when more of Don Aquiles men come and tell the family they are being evicted. The family says this is all they have, but the men start taking stuff out of the house, they say isn't Don Aquiles still in jail, they tell the family no, and they put all their stuff in the street. Don Aquiles shows up and tells them I told you so. Magda gets in his face and tells him are you happy now. This is a decent family, have you no soul? She tells him he will be alone forever like the lowdown dog he is.



Lorenzo's friend tells him about a card game in the cantina. Lorenzo thinks it's a great way to get some money. He goes and plays and loses everything.

Rodrigo and Gala are together and he tells her there are many problems with the business and it is effecting Rod's life. Rod goes to the business, I think it is aviation, and says he is seeing the director of finances, but he is thinking of Patricio.

Back at puebla a man helps the family move their things to Magda's home. Paz is very grateful. She tells Paz that Luciana should leave town to get away from Don Aquiles, and then Lorenzo comes home and tells Paz he lost all his money gambling at the cantina. He did it to help with financial problems. Paz and Luciana talk. She asks Luciana to forgive her. Paz and Magda talk and Magda tells Paz that Luciana can go to her daughter Violetta in Mexico City find work there and never come back. They tell Luciana she should leave tomorrow.

Rodrigo has decided to come back to the puebla to think about what happened to Patricio. He goes to the mountain where he talked to Patricio before the accident and prays to God. When he is done, he walks the streets of puebla and thinks about Luciana.

Luciana is all packed and ready to go. Magda gives her money and the phone number for Violetta in Mexico City. Luciana says bye to Lorenzo. Her mama blesses her and gives her the picture of the Virgin of Guadalupe. She tells them all she loves them, puts on her shawl and leaves. Paz cries and hugs Lorenzo.

Luciana is going down the street, it almost looks like a cave tunnel, and she hears her name being called. She looks around and there is noone there. Suddenly, Sabina, the medicine woman/bruja is right behind her. She tells her destiny does not forgive, she says you' ll live but have many tears. Sabina tells her goodbye and disappears as fast as she appeared. Luciana is crying.

Advances:

Rodrigo and Gala announce their engagement.

Luciana gets off a train and runs into Rodrigo.

Labels:


Saturday, May 26, 2012

Abismo de pasión #54 05/26/12: Dalisa Does La Hermita

Alternative Titles: 

CNN, Fox News and a Farmer Have a Secret
Gabby Swings his Family Jewels
Vincente Keeps his Teeth

Iglesia PDA-Sanctuary 8:00 PM Punto
Yes, I will marry you, Damien!  Dalisa rush into one another’s arms and begin a heavy petting session.  After a while, Padre Lupe uncomfortably clears his throat.   Excuse me, he says, but do you think you can molest one another outside?  God frowns upon parishioners groping each other in front of the pulpit.  It says so in the Bible.  Trapped in a heated clinch of sexual lust and wanton frenzy, at first Dalisa do not respond to him.  Damien, I swear that I will get a hose!  Lupe gets their attention by making a loud noise with his hat.  If the Padre had not interrupted, I’m certain that Damien would have deflowered Elisa on a nearby pew.  He’s freaky like that.  Anyways, Damien tells Lupe that he got all excited because Elisa had just agreed to marry him.  Well, then that’s understandable, says the padre.  Damien wants his uncle to marry them immediately.  Lupe says no.  He wants them to do things the right way and not in secret.  Damien says if he won’t do it, they’ll have a civil ceremony.  Dalisa leaves.

Iglesia Court Yard PDA-Dalisa Road Show
The novios walk outside hand and hand.  Damien verbally lists out all of the documents they will have to have in order to marry.  He punctuates each item with a kiss.  Elisa wants to know how he already knows what they will need.   Duh, I was going to marry Florencia last week.  She doesn’t look too thrilled about that response.  He gives her a couple smoochie poos.    She asks him if he regrets breaking up with Florencia.  No, he didn’t love her anymore.  He only loves Elisa.  He feels for her what he has never felt for any other woman.  (Now I want to throw my bloomers at him).  She feels the same way.  He softly says her name, but tries to contain himself from throwing her on the grass and ravishing her in front of the church.  She demands a little kiss, but little kiss isn’t part of Damien’s vocabulary.  Once he tastes her lips, he has to have more.   More inappropriate PDA on the church lawn.  They have no shame.

Casa de Don Lucio’s
Lupe Kravitz wastes no time in spreading the wonderful news.  Practically before the lovers left the church lawn (he must have ran right past them), Lupe was over at Don Lucio’s announcing that the novios were getting married immediately.  He explains how that made out between the Virgin Mary and the communion table.  Lupe notices that Lucio isn’t as enthusiastic about the nuptials as he could be.  Lucio tells him that he supports them, but he needs time to remove all doubt that he has about them.  Lupe doesn’t understand.  I did what you told me to do, he says.   I refused to marry them.  Tell me why I refused to marry them.  Don Lucio won’t tell him.   I’m a priest.  I’m sworn to keep confessions and secrets.  The only person that can help Lupe is Dr. Whipped, says Lupe.  I can’t put that kind of pressure on anyone. 

Dr. Whipped’s Hotel Room
Damien apologizes for bothering the doctor at the hotel room but, they need medical clearance.  With the door wide open, they discreetly announce that they are getting married in the tomorrow.  The doctor explains that they will need to take a blood test in order to ensure that their blood types are compatible.  If the blood types are not compatible, their children will take the really short bus to school.  He writes an order and suggests a clinic in Merida.  With the door still open, Damien asks Dr. Edmundo Whipped Kravitz Tovar to be discreet.  He tells him not to worry.  Mrs. Kravitz walks in.  She wants to know what Dalisa was doing there.  He says none of your business and asks what she wants.  She wants to talk to him about his son, Little Enrique.  He looks shocked. 

Witch Mountain
Due to her extreme happiness, today, Elisa will be unable to fulfill her obligation to cry at least once per episode.  During her hiatus, Paloma will temporarily assume the role of the sobbing victim.

Paloma is upset because Gael left.   In my opinion, Paloma isn’t putting her heart into this task.  When she’s cries, there’s no high-pitched annoying whining or histrionics.  Ramona wants to know why Paloma didn’t tell her that Gael left town.  Why would I tell you that?  She tells her Grandmother that Gael doesn’t love her.  He’s crazy for Elisa.  She’s upset that she couldn’t convince him to stay in La Ermita.  She would be happy just staring at him.  Ramona sits nearby, nodding.  Then Ramona asks her Paloma what she would do if Gael returns and hooks up with Elisa.  Would she accept that?  I think she says that she would accept it, but she would hate Elisa forever.  Commercial.
Dr. Whipped’s Hotel Room

Dr. Whipped and Mrs. Kravitz (Begonia, his wife) discuss Little Enrique and his obsession with Florencia.  Dr. Whipped says that Enrique is not a child, but a man.  She’s not picking up what he’s putting down.   Why does he have a set of twin beds in his room?  He wants to discuss his wife’s obsession with Alfonsina.  Why does she want to be like her?  She tells him that Alfonsina is a good example.  He tells her that she is not a good example.  Alfonsina is bitter because her husband cheated on her and she lost him young.  He tells his wife to stop getting all up into Alfonsina’s business and worry about her own family.  I can never talk to you, she yells.  He opens the door and tells her to leave.  He slams the door behind her.  You go Dr. Gru A Par! 
Casa de Arango

Tonight, Damien’s got kisses and smiles for everyone!  First he walks in and greets Tonia (who’s headlights are covered up today) with a kiss.  She gives him his newspaper.  His mother wants to know if he’s got any kisses for her.  He does.  Alfonsina smells a rat.  Why are you so damn happy?  No reason in particular, he says and tries to walk away.  Tell me the truth Damien.  Does this have anything to do with Elisa?  Oh yeah!  I get to see her naked on Monday!  He feels uncomfortable telling his carnal thoughts about Elisa to his mother, but he does share with her that Elisa is his girlfriend. He does not want to discuss it.   Alfonsina tells him that she will not argue with him; however, she will never accept that relationship.  She will disinherit him if he doesn’t leave Elisa alone.  He doesn’t care about her threats.  He’s been mentally planning several kama sutra positions ever since his fiancé agreed to marry him.  He gives her another kiss.  Good night, ma.
Casa de Arango-Kitchen

Braulio and Vincente are sitting at the table.  Tonia brings Braulio and Vincente a plate.  Vincente is giving Braulio the stink eye.  Braulio tells Tonia that Gabby offered Vincente a job as his assistant.  Tonia has a Code Red San Onofre power plant meltdown.  She’s yelling and screaming and pounding on the table (Italian?). You will not have anything to do with Gabby ever.  The only thing he can teach you is how to be an incredibly sexy and virile thug with great abs!  The reason that Gabby offered him that job was to screw with me, says Braulio.  Vincente stands up and tells Braulio that he’s a nobody and anyone can tell him what to do.  He doesn’t want to be like him.  Vincente storms off from the table and gets away with his teeth.  If I was Braulio, I would have been handcuffed in the back of the police car by now.    
Casa de Castanon-Agosto’s Office 

Elisa is frantically searching for her birth certificate.  Lolita enters the room and asks what she’s looking for.  Elisa jumps!  Elisa tells Lolita that she and Damien are getting married and they need the certificate for their blood tests and marriage certificate.  Elisa invites her to be a witness.  Lolita is all excited for her and helps her search.  Just as Lolita pulls it out of the folder, Carmina hobbles in on crutches.  She is really milking that sprained ankle.  I’ve seen people give birth in less time.  Anyways, back to the story.  She wants to know what they’re doing.  They tell her that they are looking for Estefania’s property papers.  Carmina does not buy it. 
Casa de Don Lucio-Violation of all Possible HIPPA Rules and Regulations

Dr. Gru a Par relays to Don Lucio the events of the evening.  You told me that they were getting married, but I didn’t expect them to come to my hotel.  They’re getting married on Monday.  I told them about the medical certificate, but Damien already knows what to do because of his engagement to Florencia.  Don Lucio and Dr. Gruapar discuss the blood test.  Lucio wants to ensure that the novios are not siblings.  Dr. Gruapar says that he has ordered blood test and a paternity test.  He’ll get the results first. 
Casa de Don Lucio

Agosto rings the doorbell.  He’s come over to talk to Lucio, but it’s not important.  Don Lucio tells him that he might as well talk, now that he’s there.  Agosto wants to know what was in Rosendo’s car on the night that he crashed with Estefania.  Lucio tells him that the car only contained Rosendo’s suitcase full of clothes and nothing more.  Estas seguro?  Yes.  Absolutely.  Lucio wants to know why Agosto is asking questions like this.  No reason.  I just wanted to come to your house in the middle of the night and ask a cryptic question about my dead wife and her lover.  See ya later. 
Assessors Office and Clinic-PDA

Dalisa happily enter the assessor’s office.  They are both young, in great shape, they look ecstatic and they can’t keep their hands off one another.  Can I get a volunteer to hold her down while I punch her?  She gives the clerk her birth certificate.  He holds her while he signs the marriage certificate and they kiss.  Later, at the clinic, they sit down to look at some forms.  He’s written “I love you” on his folder.  He switches folders.  She reads it and then they kiss.  She gets her blood drawn and they kiss.  He stretches out his sinewy rock hard arm for his blood test and they kiss.  He pretends that the pain of the needle is so great that they continue to kiss throughout his blood draw and I am getting sicker by the second.  Somebody else take over this recap because I have to throw-up from all of the love. 
Witch Mountain

Oh good!  The phlebotomist hosed off Dalisa and managed to separate the two lovebirds from each other.   Anyways, once again, Elisa is there to cheer up Paloma.  Elisa asks Paloma about Gaels departure.  Tearful Paloma, barely audible, tells her the Gael is gone.  He didn’t tell Lupe his plans either.  She wants to know if Elisa has come to know how special he is now that she’s broken up with Damien.    Elisa tells Paloma that she and Damien are getting hitched.  I hold my breath.  I’ve got the suicide prevention line on speed dial just in case Paloma wants to jump through one of the windows.  False alarm!  Paloma seems genuinely happy for her friend.  They hug.  Oh my gosh!  If you’re marrying Damien, that means Gael will be all mine!  Congratulations!  Elisa asks if Paloma will be her witness with Lolita.  Yeppers, cuz I want to make damn sure that you are officially off the market before Gael gets back.  When’s the wedding? Tomorrow.  Close up of Paloma’s shocked expression.  Commercial. 
Casa de Don Lucio

So, Elisa has agreed to marry you?  Yes, Don Lucio, says Damien.  Since Don Lucio was a friend of Rosendo, Damien wants him to be a witness.  Lucio looks constipated.  Damien wants him to support his decision to marry Elisa.  Lucio says of course, but he’s not sure.  Lucio wants to know how Alfonsina reacted.  Damien doesn’t care.  Tomorrow’s my wedding night and I am about to go buck wild!  My bad.  I forgot she’s like a daughter to you.  I’m not telling my mother until the deed is done and over with.  Lucio wants to know why they are doing everything in secret.  It’s not a secret Don Lucio.  Don Lucio tells him that tomorrow is too soon and suggests sometime next week.  If our parents find out about our plans to marry, they will ruin everything.  Damien is getting irritated from all of the stalling.  Are you for us or against us?  Be upfront about it.  Don Lucio assures Damien that he supports them; he just thinks that next week will be better.  He tells Damien that he may not show up tomorrow because of prior business.  Damien says that only death will keep him from marrying Elisa (Now I want to throw my bra at him too). 
Casa de Mickey and Mallory

Ingrid is searching for something.  She screams out Gabby’s name.  She’s not wearing the necklace.
Casa de Castanon

Carmina lets Gabby into the foyer.  He knows that she went to visit Ingrid.  He shows her the custom made necklace with no identifiable customized markings.  She’s reaching for it, but she’s not quick enough.  He tells her that it’s the necklace that she stole from her sister to keep him quiet.  He calls her a thief and an adulterer.  She demands the necklace.  The pearls are wrapped around his hand.  He tells her that if she bothers Ingrid one more time, he will give the necklace to Agosto and tell him everything.  I have never in my life been so attracted to Gabby than I am right now.  Gabby is almost shouting in the foyer.  At that exact moment, Agosto interrupts.  He wants to know how Gabby got Estefania’s pearls.  Gabby tells him that he gave the necklace to the woman at the bank.  Years ago your wife…. (he deliberately didn’t say which one) gave it to me for his silence.   Carmina corrects him (Estefania, Estefania gave it to him)!  Gabby begins again.  Years ago, um…yes your wife, Estefania gave it to me for doing some favors for her and his boss (God rest his soul).  Agosto wants to know where the rest of the jewelry is.  Gabino doesn’t know what happened to the rest of the jewelry.  Agosto wants the necklace.  Gabby says no.  It belongs to my woman.  I’ve had this for a lot of years.  I didn’t steal anything.  Agosto offers to buy it.  Back off, buddy!  My woman is keeping the necklace, besides, you can’t afford to by this necklace back.  He exits.  I was wrong.  Now I am more attracted to Gabby than I have ever been.  There cannot possibly be a better boyfriend.  Commercial.
Mexico City-Rappers Lake

Guido and Florencia are strolling along the lake in distracting Easter Egg pastel track suits.  Guido should be seriously wearing a black Kango hat with gold chains, and screaming into a microphone.  Anyways, Guido tells her daughter that he saw her with some guy last night.  He wants to know his name.  She avoids telling him that it was Enrique.
Case de Dr. Gruapar less Dr. Gruapar

Enrique hurries into the house with his luggage.  He kisses his sister who is sitting at the kitchen table.  He tells her about his time with Florencia in Mexico.   He’s still speaking when his mother enters the room.   She wants to know where he’s been.  I’ve just returned from Mexico.   She tells him to get out.  She made it very clear that if he went to Mexico, he was not welcome back in the Casa de Gruapar (menos Dr. Gruapar).  Enrique is shocked.  She points to the door. 
Casa de Castanon-Home office

Agosto is sitting at his desk looking bummed when Carmina hobbles in.  He wants to know what happened to the rest of those jewels.  She tells him not worry about the past; worry about what’s happening now.  Yesterday, Elisa was in your office looking for Estefania’s field papers.  She is so evil.  I love her. 
Restaurante PDA

Dalisa is looking at the blood test document.  She says something about Damien having a rare blood type.  He inherited it from his father.  Damien wants to know what else they need.  She lists everything that they have already accomplished.  They just need the medical certificate.  Damien tells her that Lucio won’t be his witness.  He’ll ask Braulio if Lupe won’t do it.  She says that they have one more important thing to do.  She kisses him and shyly looks around to make sure no one was looking.  Are you kidding me?  They practically had sex in front of a priest and she’s worried about the people seeing them kiss in a restaurant?  Damien wants to spend the entire day with her so time will go faster (They make me sick, but Awwwwwwhhhhh.  That is so cute.).  They gather all of their papers and leave the restaurant.  He checks her butt out as she goes ahead of him.  Commercial.
Cenote

Dalisa are sitting on a rock with their feet in the water.  She doesn’t like that they have to hide like criminals.  Everyone that they love knows that they are getting married: Lupe, Paloma, Lucio and Dolores.  He tells her that he told his mother.  You told your mother that we’re jumping the broom.  Do I look dumb?  No, I just told her that I’m crazy for you.  She’s going to disinherit me for marrying you.  Will you still love me if I’m poor?  Yes, of course.  She wishes Gael, her mother and Blanca could come.  And my father too?  She suggests that they visit the cemetery.   These two are certainly sicko exhibitionists. 
Restaurante Date Night

Horacio is sitting at a table drinking a cool beverage.  Lolita walks in.  He’s quite the half-gentleman.  He stands when he sees her, but doesn’t pull out her chair.  Meanwhile, Braulio and Tonia are seated at a nearby table.  Tonia points out that Dolores has to be pretty desperate for a husband to be hanging out with Horacio and I kind of agree with her.  Braulio wants to know why Tonia is always making little digs at Dolores.  He tells her that their leaving (so much for date night).   Horacio kisses Lolita’s hand.  She smiles.  Looks like he’ll get to carry her milk home after all. 
Casa de Castanon

My boyfriend’s back and he’s back at la casa.  Hey na Hey na, yeah my boyfriend’s back!  Gabby returns to the Casa de Castanon.  Carmina opens the door.  He wants to remind her that he can take her down in a Mexico City minute.  The jewelry is mine, the house is mine.  Leave Gingrid alone.  He kicks her crutch and lets himself out.  He is a keeper.  He got Ingrid a house and she doesn’t have to work.  He’s sexy and extremely virile.  He gets her jewelry.  He kidnaps for her and he’s very protective of her.  He accepts her faults and realizes that he has his own.  What more can I want?    Agosto hears the door close and comes into the foyer.  Who were you talking to?  Horacio, she says.  He tells her that he’s going to the cantina.  She asks him to drink alone.  She doesn’t want him sleeping over at some chick’s house again.  He asks where she’s going.  She doesn’t know.  When he opens the door, Alfonsina steps in.   She does not look happy. 
Cemetery-PDA Perverts

Visiting a cemetery in order to talk to dead people is a fun date?  This is why I prefer to date Gabby in my dreams.  Dalisa are standing over Estefania’s grave looking at the pitiful little wooden cross marker.  Elisa asks Damien to tell her about his father.  He was the best father in the world.  He just cheated on my mother all the time and was abandoning us when he died.  That’s why mother is bitter and hates the world.  And your mother?  How was she?  I have great memories of my mother, says Elisa.  Elisa bends down to touch the marker.  Damien lifts her up, hugs her and kisses her.  They make the sign of the cross and walk away. 
Casa de Castanon-Foyer

Carmina tells Alfonsina to make the conversation quick.  Agosto has to get drunk and she’s got to go boink Paolo.  I came to talk to your husband, not you.  Run along now, sweetie!  Carmina is shocked when Agosto tells her to leave, but she excuses herself.  They go into his office for the private conversation and leave the door wide open so others can hear.  He tells her that he doesn’t want to talk about Elisa marrying Paolo.  Alfonsina has come to discuss the situation between Elisa and Damien.  Didn’t he know that they are going together?  He looks confused.  I’m confused too.  Last week, she told him that Elisa was messing with Paolo.  She tells him that she will destroy him if he can’t keep his daughter away from Damien.  She even offers to buy his property so that he can take Elisa far away.  He says that he would never sell his property to her.  They argue over who has less control of their free, Latino and over the age of 21 children.  He tells her to get the hell out of his house.  Credits. 

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