Mentir Para Vivir #55 Tue 12/24/13 Two Hookers Own the Casa Bonita Brothel and Occupancy is Still at an All Time Low? What's Up With That?

Down by the seashore, Piero asks Fabiola if she will consider marrying him.  He’s on the rebound and wants a sweet young thang in his life and since she’s gotta a biscuit in the oven who needs a daddy….he thinks that they might be able to help each other out.  For her birthday, he gives her a small box from Tiffany’s, hinting that there’s more where that came from.  I’ll be your J. Howard Marshall or Howard K Stern (whichever you prefer) and you can be my Anna Nicole Smith.  He tells her that he loves her and hopes that she might eventually come to love him too.  Piero leaves her at the beach with a lot to think about it. 

Later, Piero finds Ricky, on his bed, agonizing over the gun that killed his father and Berto.  Ricky tells him that Jose Luis gave the gun to Oriana.  Ricky goes on to say how Homero and Leonardo may have foiled a potential kidnapping-murder plot by Jose Luis.  Ricky tells Piero to return to the office cuz somebody’s got to run the company.  (Please someone fill in this conversation)

Out on the patio, Oriana gazes into the sea.  Fabiola trails behind Rhodalina, who has come to see her mother.  Bored, Tito dreams of the day when his body is completely healed, and he will be able to lift his leg against the cool iron of a yellow fire hydrant.  Maybe he’ll chase a tom cat or a squirrel.  Oriana asks Fabiola to keep an eye on Rhodalina for her while she speaks with Paloma. 

In Paloma’s bedroom, Oriana says that she doesn’t want any more lies.  They will go back tomorrow.  (Please someone fill in the rest of this conversation).

After Piero’s departure, Ricky carefully removes the gun from the red gift box and stoically reflects on all that has happened.  Oriana enters the room and goes straight into Ricky’s arms for some cuddles.  He happily obliges while she tells him that she is tired of lying.  Ricky tells her to be strong.  She doesn’t know what Jose Luis wants.  He can’t be trusted; he’ll back out of the deal.  Ricky says that they will play along with him. 

Out on the patio, Homero and Leonardo have returned to the beach house.  Homero wants to know why Francisco Castro was so forth coming about Ines’ drug addiction.  After the maid serves refreshments, Paloma comes out and invites them to sit down.  Nearby, an armed hillbilly, who is wearing a plaid shirt and sporting a duck-billed hat embroidered with a random chewing tobacco brand, keeps watch on the perimeter.  Homero wants to know why they are hiding.  If they are hiding from burglars, the hayseed guards are cool, but if they are hiding from drug dealers or worse, they are going to need more fire power.   Paloma shares that Fabiola is baking a biscuit for Sebastian and they are afraid that he will come and drag Fabiola off by her hair.  Homero says he knows cuz Leonardo told him.  Leonardo tells Paloma about his violent encounter with Sebastian.  She learns that Mathilde knows about the pregnancy.  The two men leave.  Outside of the compound, Homero says that he doesn’t believe her.  Leonardo wants to know why he didn’t ask more probing questions and why he didn’t tell Paloma about their conversation with Francisco Castro.  Homero says that she will know about it soon enough. 

A little while later, Fedelia, Paloma, Oriana and Ricardo are sitting at the dining room table.  Fedelia thinks that Homero was rude for not coming to say goodbye to family.  Fedelia has enjoyed visitors in the house.  Paloma tells Fedelia that she is welcome in her home anytime.  Fedelia is sure that Matilde doesn’t feel the same way.  Ricky thinks it’s weird that Homero didn’t mention meeting Jose Luis.  He tells Fedelia that they are returning home tomorrow. 

Raquel talks on the phone with Lucina while Jose Luis drives them back to the city.  Lucina demands to know how she knew how to find Oriana.  Lucina demands to know who she's with and where she is?  Raquel hangs up on her.  Jose Luis tells her not to mention that she was with him and that they visited Oriana and Ricky.  A new car with a big red bow awaits Raquel in the driveway of the Casa Bonita Hotel.  He tells her not to tell anyone that he bought the car.  Jose Luis drives off as she gushes over it.

Meanwhile, the new priest conducts mass at the church while Mariano prays for guidance in the gym. The defrocked priest kneels before the cross and earnestly prays that he will be delivered from the lustful and covetous thoughts that he has about Oriana’s voluptuous bootay and extremely ample breastesses.  The church secretary interrupts and asks why he isn’t in the pulpit giving the mass.  He avoids telling her that every time he closes his eyes, he can smell Oriana’s perfume.  She knows that he put a beat down on Sebastian.  She says that she would have hit him with a frying pan.  A phone call from Ricky interrupts their conversation.  Ricky tells the Mariano that the whole gang is returning tomorrow and he needs Mariano to have his back just in case Matilde tries to start some sh*t with him.  Mariano reminds him that he is no longer a priest.  Ricky wants him there because he has a calming manner with people and Fabiola is afraid of her mother.  Anyway, Matilde knows that his brother/son/bastard or whatever got Fabiola pregnant and Matilde might demand a shotgun wedding.  Pretty Ricky doesn’t want to hit a woman, but he will fight her like a man if she goes for his face.  Mariano says that he’ll be there with the brass knuckles if anything goes down.  Together, they can take her! 

Lucina drags her business partner up the stairs and into her bedroom.  They fight over that fact that Raquel is screwing Jose Luis and accepting gifts from him.  Raquel is upset that Lucina has taken Oriana’s side.  Lucina fires off several questions.  Where did you get the car?  How did you know where Oriana was?  Raquel says that she has an equal say in the business.  Lucina reminds her that she put up money than Raquel did.  Apparently, they were both prostitutes when they met.  Lucina wants to buy Raquel out.  Raquel wants to know where she will get the money…on her back?  Anyway, Raquel tells her that nobody will want an old hooker.  Lucina smacks her.  Raquel smacks her back, but Lucina throws all of weight behind the follow-up punch and easily decks Raquel. 

In the next scene, the hotel maids apply ice to Raquel’s irate and bruised face.  Lucina wants to know if they should call a doctor.  Felipe says that Raquel will just swell and bruise.  Sitting on her bed, now remorseful, Lucina winces from the pain in her hand resulting from the vicious TKO blow to Raquel’s face.  Lucina kicks everyone out of the room and takes over the first aid on her friend.  Raquel barks at her out that she will never forgive her.  Lucina explains to Raquel why she is concerned about her relationship with Jose Luis.  She reminds Raquel that Jose Luis is a dangerous crimminal.  Raquel says that it is her life and storms out of the room.  Lucina uses Raquel's discarded ice on her fist. 

Deep in the Bat Cave, Homero’s butler informs him that Eliseo was snooping around, but he threatened him with Neron the man eating doberman.  Homero wants Leonard to visit his godfather, Alfredo Trejo Bonfil.  Leonardo wants to know why, but Homero dodges the question by asking about Fabiola.  Leonardo can’t hit on her because Piero is c-blockin’ him.  Homero can’t believe that Leonardo is going to let Piero intimidate him. 

Over at Suckero-Buffoon Textiles, Antonio introduces Sebastian Sanchez Bratt-on to Don Suckero Trejo Buffoon…I mean Don Alfredo Trejo Bonfil.  Don Suckero fears corporate espionage when he hears Sebastian’s surname, but a combination of senility, desperation and gobs of moola chase those pesky rational thoughts away.  Don Suckero warmly welcomes the potential corporate spy on board. He informs the Trifecta of Evil that the Caribbean Investment Company has deposited a butt load of money into the Arte Foclore account.  Jose Luis says that they need to withdraw it immediately.  Don Suckero says withdrawing money wasn’t part of the deal.  He asks if they shared that with his attorney’s during contract negotiations.  Antonio assures him that they did.  They need to withdraw the money in order to be competitive with Aresti Breton.  Jose Luis would like Sebastian to be the shipping supervisor.  Don Suckero points out that Sebastian is a little young for the job.  Sebastian says he’s 20 and has learned a lot “working” for his brother.  Don Suckero asks if Ricky is OK with his working for his competition.  Sebastian doesn’t know and doesn’t care.  Jose Luis says that Sebastian has a lot of contacts and will be in charge of logistics.  Jose Luis tells him to “trust us”.  Once again, Don Suckero is squashes his valid fears and welcomes Sebastian to the company. 

Back at the beach house, Paloma and Oriana flank Fabiola as they inform her that the “everyone” is returning to Hermosa.  Oriana tells her that Matilde knows that she’s carrying the spawn of Sabastian.  Fabiola tears up.  If she has to face her mother, she doesn’t want to go. Matilde will make her marry Sabastian.  Oriana says that there comes a point when you have have to stop letting people control you.  Oriana and Paloma tell her that she will not be alone.  Her mother won’t be able to manipulate her with them around. 

Why me?  Oriana enters Ricky’s room and…oh joy, more kissing and slurping noises.  She’s happy that Ricky was there with her when Jose Luis came for her.  Ricky barely manages to focus on their discussion in between smoochies.  He tells her that he sent Joaquin an email asking him to stop Jose Luis from stalking her.  She says that Jose Luis will be pissed when he learns that she’s not moving back in with him.  He tells her how much he loves her and assures her that they will get out of this.  Once she kisses the spot behind his right ear, it’s all over…from then on, all he hears is “blah, blah blah …SEX!”..”blah blah blah...BOOBIES!”.  Their awful theme song starts and he’s only got love on his mind.  Their clothes fall off and they are kneeling on the bed subjecting the poor gold fish to their lewd and lascivious activities. 

Get Oriana to a gynecologist, immediately! SHE ROCKED HIS FREAKIN’ WORLD!  She put a hurting on him and made him feel like a new man!  How so, you ask? Well, after a night of filled with filth and debauchery, the following morning, before the rooster crowed, Ricky was up babysitting and cooking breakfast for another man’s child while Oriana slept in.  You GO GIRL!  Both Rhodalina and I wanted to know why he didn’t tell Christina to cook.  Before that morning, Richie Rich didn’t even know where the pans were located.  He’d always assumed they were kept in those wooden storage containers things on the wall in the room where the food appears magically.  AKA, the place where Celio works!  Hopefully, he sanitized those hands before touching that little girl. 

Back at the Casa Bonita, Lucina begs Raquel to forgive her for knocking the dog sh*t out of her.  She’s feels really guilty about it.  And she’s suffering too..she broke a nail and her hand hurts.  Raquel ain’t trying to hear all that.  Jose Luis is rich, handsome and he bought her a car.  She puts Lucina out of her room and says that she will never forgive her. 

At Aresti mansion, Mariano greets Ruben and Cesar in the living room.  Cesar wants to know what happened to Mariano’s collar.  Mariano tells them that he resigned for personal reasons.  Matilde comes out and tells the three fellas that Fabiola will marry Sebastian or get an abortion.  She doesn’t want to be part of another scandal.  She brings up how Oriana left Ricky for Jose Luis.

Outside, Oriana, Paloma and Rhodalina are in the driveway.  Rhodalina wants to know if they have to live with her father.  That’s a negative, says Paloma.  When they enter the courtyard, the excited staff greets them and they are thrilled that Paloma is there to rescue them from Matilde’s tyrannical rule.  The three fellas all run out and greet the women warmly.  Saccharin Mary Lu is also there to kiss Oriana’s butt.  Fabiola thanks her for her kindness.  Cesar walks Marilu out. 

Later in the living room, as promised, Oriana and Paloma protectively flank Fabiola as Matilda throws a maniacal bitch fit.  Mariano tries jumping in, but Matilde mocks him for losing his collar.  Ruben holds the priest back.  Dude, I can’t let you hit her, but she’s still my mom.  Paloma tells her to shut up.  Paloma asks Fabiola what she wants to do.  Fabiola says that she doesn’t want to marry Sebastian because he called her easy.  She assures her mother that Sebastian was her one and only lover.  Feeling empowered by all of the support his daughter is getting, Ruben bravely picks up one of his balls and places it back in his pants where it belongs.  He’s been waiting for a special occasion to use it and now the perfect opportunity for action has presented itself.  He cowardly cautiously hides behind Oriana as he tells Matilde to allow Fabiola to make her own decision.  Matilde challenges his authority.  Ricky comes in and tells Matilde that he knows Sebastian better than anyone.  He might be my son/brother/bastard or whatever but, Sebastian is a lazy, rebellious, bum.  Don’t make your daughter marry him.  Matilde says she’s got to marry somebody if she’s going to keep that baby.

Fine says, Fabiola.  I won’t marry Sebastian, but I will marry Piero. 

Matilde is stunned, but Paloma looks horrified.