Caray, Caray!

We revisit Monica waiting in the hospital lobby as CL has a battery of tests following his two episodes of debilitating pain the day before. Paula makes a snide remark to Moni with a super fake smile, and Moni retorts with a perfectly matched smile and tone. Paula supposes her hubby has Moni well-informed (estar al tanto de todo-to be on the ball, but I’m loosely interpreting that CL has caught Moni up on his situation with Paula)—Moni only knows that they have their distance and Paula’s moved back to her Mami’s house. She ASSURES Paula that she can believe Moni isn’t there with an agenda to irritate Paula, and she doesn’t see any harm in her coming to the hospital with CL. Between barbs, she pages through magazines and occasionally makes eye contact, because she’s Clearly Bored With This Conversation. Poor guy, these things terrify him. Paula is annoyed to acknowledge she didn’t know that. They’re still just getting to know each other. Moni cheerily (or cheekily, depending on one’s perspective) tells Paula she’s giving her the 411 and Paula looks P.O.’d.

We revisit Delirio regaling Pastor with the merits of the sof-WHERE (in English) that he wants to install on all the company computers. Delirio wants to make a presentation to show how it works. Delirio rubs his hands in anticipation and doesn’t even register that Pastor rubs his hands in a mirror image while they talk [Ed. Note: But Roberto D’Amico/Alirio is having trouble not laughing]. Pastor comments dryly on his efficiency and Delirio says he wants to show that not Everyone In This Office Invents Obstacles and Throws up Hindrances. He shakes a finger gently at Pastor and smiles cattily. Pastor is better at smiling cattily anyway. He’ll tell Don CL’s secretary that Delirio wants an appointment. Pastor keeps working his hands…..he supposes that Delirio wants the boss there? Of course, he’s the owner, right? [Roberto D’Amico is struggling not to bust out laughing]. But of course, it interests Delirio most that Pastor is present, since he always has the Final Word. Pastor, miming Delirio’s handwaving gesture, wildly waves and tells Delirio he’s glad Delirio is finally with the program. He picks up the phone.

Paula thinks it’s strange that CL asked Moni to go with him and not Paula herself. Moni tells Paula she simply offered, he didn’t ask. That pain he had yesterday came again last night, Moni wasn’t there but someone had told her [Ed. Note: we all know who That was, folks]. So, she decided to call Dr. Vaquiero to ask for an immediate appointment. The doc recommended a general examination. Paula wonders if she should thank Moni for that. Moni tells her “look, Paula, CL minimizes every discomfort. But he’s not well.” She’s got to take better care of him. [Oooh, that’s pretty presumptuous of an ex.] Paula wonders why she continues worrying about him so much? Moni points out he’s her partner in business. Paula finally sits down next to her. “Only for that?” Moni closes the magazine, irritated. “You know perfectly well that’s not it. I was at his side for many years. You don’t erase that between night and morning.” Paula didn’t expect that response. Then, Paula nails her: is Moni still in love with him? [Ed. Note: Would that make life easier for you, Paula?] Moni thinks a second. “I don’t believe so.” Paula tries to nail her again; “you believe not, or could it be that the possibility exists?” Moni retorts that this story was totally unforeseen for her, she’s still in the stage of trying to assimilate all that has happened, and what’s important is not what Moni still feels for CL, but it’s most important that little by little she’s accepting that she’s no longer part of his life nor he of hers. Paula scoffs [Ed. Note: so gracious. Sheesh.] She imagines; it must be very difficult to work in the same office. Moni denies that; it’s actually been like therapy. Seeing him every day and knowing he’s “a stranger” is a good way to know it’s over. Paula eyes her in disbelief. CL is wheeled up with his minimal patient gown on; he’s impactado to see his wife with his ex. She’s righteously indignant, arms crossed and not willing to face him fully, looking down her nose at the pobrecito [Okay, he’s not really, but give the patient a break for a few minutes, witch]. He wonders what she’s doing there. Paula just gives him an indignant stare.

A little fiesta is being held in the once spider-infested building, which is now cheery and clean. The party guests are Herbierto, Erlinda, Anga, Susana, Juan and Molondrón. The girls are serving and the boys are eating. The world is spinning properly in Achichipico. There’s a pile of food on the table [on plates, of course]. Juan is oohing over the meal, and Molondrón changes the subject—who would have said they’d transform this into a tremendous office like this? They deserve congratulations! Juan jumps to his feet to offer applause. They all jump and applaud themselves…except Herbierto, who predictably keeps stuffing his face. Or his beer gut. Susana grabs Juan for a hug and kiss, and Erlinda is predictably irritated. Juan wants to know why Herbierto didn’t applaud with them and the Tweedle retorts—with his mouth totally full-- for Juan to leave him to eat in peace. Juan presents the idea to them that Anga’s going to host an inauguration party tonight. Apparently, this is news to Anga, who could choke as a result here. He stares at Juan, who continues to describe how they’ll all go home and clean up, and reassemble at 9:00 [Ed. Note: that’s my bedtime. They’re just beginning to party? ¡Ay!]. He gives Molondrón some directions for decorating and tells Anga to get to the bank and cover the bills for the big blowout. Anga looks impactado yet again, the guy who’s not supposed to experience any strong emotions or it could kill him. [Ed. Note: we hope the addendum he wanted to put onto his will is done]. Juan babbles on—he wants someone to pass him the toasted pig skin.

Paula has come over to CL’s wheelchair to address him head-on. She scolds him because he hadn’t told her he wasn’t feeling well. Doesn’t he think he should have? He didn’t want her to worry, CL tells Paula. Moni hovers in the background, taking this tender scene in. Paula scolds that of course she’s worried. She could have come with him. He seems a little bemused; it’s an examination that’s not too important. She points out she thought there were in a period of rebuilding their trust. CL tells her he’s not really sure what period they are in, what he should share with her and what he shouldn’t. Paula looks over her shoulder at Moni, who gives a little smirk. Paula turns back and asks because of that, is that why he wanted to share it with his ex? He points out that Moni offered, and got him the appointment. Paula scoffs sarcastically; what a good person Moni is. What an excellent ex wife he has, right? He tries to explain and Paula cuts him off; Moni told her. Enough already. CL tries to take her hand and finally traps it; it isn’t that he wanted to irritate her [Ed. Note: who would? She’s a world-class witch when she’s irritated.] She continues sarcastically; who wouldn’t feel delighted that CL could share this experience with his ex? CL kisses her hand, and if she wants, he’ll tell Moni this instant thanks for her company, and she can go home and Paula will stay. Paula ungraciously tells him to not even think about making her look like a foolish child. [Ed. Note: Why not? You’ve already done the heavy lifting on that, Paula]. He tells her that nothing has happened and what’s more, he’s glad she’s here. He pulls her down for a kiss. She smiles at him lovingly [Whew, that turnaround made my head spin] and CL tells her she’s jealous. She denies it. Moni continues to hover in the background, looking a little alarmed over the turn of events. CL shakes his finger fondly, yep, it’s true. The nurse comes to take him off for more tests. He wants another minute or two; the nurse tells him she’ll be right back for him. He tells Paula the most difficult tests are yet to come; the blood tests [Coward! But, it takes one to know one]. All those tests that these folks want him to take in a single day, they’re going to dissect him (disecar). Paula responds with more caring. She jokes and kneels at his level, still holding his hand. Moni looks uncomfortable as she fidgets behind them. There’s a dicho here “si se te quita lo payaso” and I can’t figure it out. Help, Maricruz or someone? CL looks at Paula lovingly (sincere? Puede ser.) He wants to know for sure she’s not mad with him. She says she’s not, finally smiling broadly. Moni looks dissssgusted. He wants to know if she’s going to stay, and she teases; she’ not sure. He shakes his finger and tells her he’s leaving if she doesn’t agree right now. She promises to stay and he demands a little kiss on his cheek, which she obligingly gives. CL wants another. And another. She laughs and the nurse comes to take him away. He tells her to wait over his shoulder as he’s wheeled out. Paula and Moni eye each other…..

The doc and a fully dressed CL meet in the office to look at preliminary results. The doc wonders if CL has been stressed and not eating well. CL acknowledges that might be the case. Is that why he had the pain? It’s a possibility. CL protests; he told the doc he’s a healthy man. Whatever, the doc says (however), I want you to see a urologist. CL is impactado. Huh? The doc delivers a Univision PSA. Has CL ever had a prostate exam? CL throws back his head and scoffs with laughter. Whatever for? The doc continues with the PSA. After 40, guys gotta have the exams, at the very least once a year. CL tells the doc it’s not bothering him. The doc says that’s no guarantee everything is okay. One of the blood tests showed something troublesome. He’s got CL’s attention now. What? Well, not to alarm CL, it could be something or it could be nothing. That’s why he wants CL to see the urologist. [Ed. Note: right about now my hubby would be saying “ewww.] He wants CL to see the urologist Right Now. Nope, CL tells him, not doing it. The doc insists; the urologist is on the next floor. Nope, not doing it. He’s already lost an entire day. Tomorrow. The doc seizes the day and the telephone; he calls and sets up the appointment much to CL’s irritation. CL is Not a Happy Camper.

Moni is returning to the waiting room with snacks and offers Paula a cookie (galleta). Paula declines but stops reading her magazine. It surprises her that the examination is taking a full day. Moni is sure it’s head to foot, because their family practitioner is a perfectionist. [Hm, how is Paula going to feel about CL going to his and Moni’s family doc still? There’s a subtle barb.] CL strolls in. What do the girls think? He’s in perfect shape! It’s as if he was still 20! He puts his arm around Paula. Well, Moni wants to know, why the pains? He explains it’s stress and bad eating habits. Did I tell you, or what? Moni asks. Yep, I accept that it’s my fault, he acknowledges, then looks back at Paula. He asks her if they can go now. Moni wants to know if she brought her car. She did; they tap dance around him going with Paula or Moni, who supposes they don’t need her now, and Paula offers to just go on home-- but he thanks Moni for all her help because he’s obviously going home with Paula. Moni is disappointed but loses somewhat gracefully – for now—it was a great pleasure. Moni does get in a last sarcastic dig about what a great pleasure it was to see Paula, who tells her “same to ya.” (Igualmente). Moni gives CL a little hug and peck on the cheek. He looks at her like a dope. Then he turns to Paula, knowing that her eyes are glued on Moni with a glare. He’s in the catbird seat, as my Southern Boy hubby says—Paula is jealous. Paula tells him really, he could go with Moni. He begs her to take him. They go off with him following her; hands on her shoulders and biting his lip in anticipation…

Consuelo is muy impactada to see Paula come back to the apartment with CL. She Very Effectively feigns pleased excitement to see the Seño home! She was leaving, but she’ll hang out and warm the dinner if Paula is staying. And by the by, listen assiduously to any casual conversation they might have….which they do and she does. CL seizes on this and convinces Paula to stay.

Moni, on the other hand is less than pleased with how it all came down. She’s yelling about that stupid woman. She stayed the whole blessed day waiting to see what the examinations showed. Paula arrived just in time to scold Moni, why hadn’t Paula been informed, and because Moni was the one there, it turns out the offended party is Paula! Moni is totally incensed with this turn of events. Laura wonders why she’s got her knickers in a knot; it’s logical that the wife might want to know what’s up. Moni yells that this left her UPSET. So, so, so bad! Laura points out that nothing’s going to change if she keeps doing what she did today. Moni shakes her finger at her cousin; this remains to be seen. Moni tells her to remember she has a vengeance to collect. Laura points out that every day it gives her more pain. But it’s her life. It looks like in the end no one is going to take that obsession away from Moni. Moni asserts that today she lost a battle but she’s still going to win the war. She resents the existence of this imbecile.

Paula has stayed with CL for dinner, but is trying to convince Ana over the phone that it’ll be okay and she should calm down. CL comes behind her and wonders if Ana wasn’t amused that Paula’s going to have dinner with him. Paula points out they’ve been doing so well and they wouldn’t want to lose that. He agrees, she’s right, and he’s brought her a little tequila to whet her appetite. They clink glasses and drink to their health.

A phone jars us and we see that Marely is getting a call. Surprise, it’s Fernando. He asks how she is and she tells him fine; but he says it doesn’t seem like it. She fills him in a little. Nidia thinks they’re all trying to drive her crazy. She wonders why he hasn’t left yet. He’s not been able to leave on the bus tonight for his trip, and is staying in a hotel near the bus station, so he thought he’d call to tell her good night. Marely smiles shyly and thanks him. He tells her to rest and not worry too much for Nidia; he know that Nidia adores Marely. Marely hopes so and thanks him again. She tells him that she loves it that he calls her. He tells her he needed to hear her, and bids her goodbye “”until my return.” Marely smiles happily and hopefully for the first time in centuries as she hang up.

Our Juan is dressed to the nines (or more) with snakeskin boots, we see as the camera starts at the bottom and pans upward. Molondrón is admiring Juan’s garb, wondering where Juan came by it. He’s not too shabby himself with the crisp whites and the white ten-gallon hat. Juan tells him to listen to the cough….and explains how he “came by” the clothes. If anyone caught all he’s saying about guarding Delfi’s part in it, please feel free to fill us in! Juanito rushes in; he wants to know how Papi thinks he looks. [Cute as a button, if you ask us.] Juan compliments Juanito effusively and says they better get moving because they want to be the first ones there. Molondrón wants to know if it isn’t that Juan wants to impress Susana. Molondrón is mournful about Erlinda, though. Juan gives him a pep talk about what Molondrón should be doing to comfort her. Juanito is listening closely; he has a lady to impress, too. Juan tells Molondrón to use his little rhymes and songs to enchant the lady. Molondrón points out this lady is very enamored of Juan; Juan doesn’t want to hear of it. He wants Molondrón to take advantage of her being a new, rowdy little thing of today (instead of a nun?). Write a little ditty, and declare it – play it for all it’s worth, play to win! But, Molondrón doubts, isn’t it a little fast? Nope, Juan assures him. Go for it. Don’t leave for tomorrow what you can do today. Juanito listens raptly to his Papi’s palavering. Juan tells Molondrón how to behave—what makes the gals sit up and take notice is a guy who’s bold, arrogant…has substance! Juan thought bubbles that the lecture he was giving Molondrón was being heard and carefully noted by his own son, he continues that Juan himself was to find out he was wrong about love and women, and giving him a blind person’s cane (misleading him, my loose interpretation of “dar palos de ciego,” giving canes to blind folks or giving him a cane for a blind person). Juan dances as he talks to himself. He continues that this is the first day of the rest of his life, and he’s going to take advantage of the opportunity with Susana and go directly to her heart. Molondrón and Juanito talk amongst themselves while Juan is lost in thought bubbling.

Consuelo offers a coffee, which Paula refuses, and checks her watch. Oh, it’s late! Time to go! CL begs her not to leave, instead to spend the night with him. Paula is mildly commercial impactada. [Well, what DID you expect? You know your hubby well enough by now].

CL hasn’t given up while we heard about Desperate Housewives and Guapos. [Uh, that’s two separate programs, though.] He’s stroking her arm and giving her all the reasons why it would be a Good Idea for her to Stay. Tomorrow she can go back to her Mami’s house. He kisses her fingers. Puh-leeeeze!???? It’s been a long time…..She begs him to lay off. He tells her this has been such a special night that he doesn’t want it to end. Ever. Consuelo is taking notes. CL tells Paula he suddenly feels like he did in those best moments of their relationship. [Ed. Question: Which two moments were those, anyway?] Does she remember? When they were a happy pair? [Ed. Note: okay, maybe it wasn’t even two moments.] She tries to get him to drop it. [Anyone in the audience want to make book on who’s winning?] Consuelo shakes her head nervously, silently willing Paula not to stay.

Casimiro is back doing what he does best; telling lies and playing pool. [Ed. Note: “Telling Lies” is a Southern Dicho—my hubby and his brother talk about doing that when they just sit down to talk and tell jokes to each other.] Herbierto finds him and complains that he’s still there. Then he tells Casimiro to get duded up because they’re going to the party (guateque—party or binge. In the case of Tweedledum and Tweedledee, it’s one and the same). T2 doesn’t Think So. He’s not up for a party, and much less one that celebrates Juan’s new enterprise. T1 tells him not to be a dunce. They’re not giving up their vengeance, quite the opposite; they’re going to put the final period on Juan. Casimiro wants to know what his bosom buddy has in mind. What else? Bring Juan down in front of Susana. What? She’s back?? Yep. Just today, and we can’t let Juan have the advantage. Tonight will be historic, Casimiro, listen up. T2 looks at him in disbelief. Herbierto gets up and gets the attention of everyone. He tells them to listen up, too—tonight ends the reign of Juan Dominguez in Achichipico! Now everyone is going to know who Herbierto Chávez is! He looks around, daring anyone to disagree.

Speaking of los Chávez, Erlinda cleans up quite well. She’s checking the mirror as she smoothes more make-up on. Aldemar strolls in exclaiming over his “lively girl.” (Pizpireta, not to be confused with a pirata.) She thanks him with a lovely smile, but wants to know if he doesn’t think her décolletage is a bit too low (escotado, low cut)? He denies that [Ed. Note: And he hasn’t even seen Ivonne or Paula at their best], because one has to know the right time to display the family jewels and to whom. [Joyas, jewels, and seems a little risqué for a Papi to say to a daughter, if you ask me!] She wants to know what if this guy she loves doesn’t want to see it? Aldemar just can’t wrap his brain around that—irresistible Juan can’t help but take notice. Erlinda is a little dubious—let’s hope so. He assures her that’s nonsense, he’s going to be paying attention right away. Erlinda looks encouraged, but still a little doubtful. Papi tells her that even Herbierto’s getting cleaned up pretty well. Erlinda’s curious and Aldemar drops that Tweedle Dumb has eyes on Susana. Tonight he’s going to let the dogs loose and Aldemar brags that he knows she’s a smart cookie, so she won’t pass up the opportunity to get married to the son of Aldemar Chávez. [Ed. Note: Huy, talk about needing a reality check!] Erlinda really is doubtful about this, perhaps the gal is looking on some other side? Aldemar acknowledges that T1 is lazy (holgazán), pretty rough around the edges (brutote), but he’s definitely not ugly. [Ed. Note: no, on second thought, there’s no Ed. Note that’s sufficient to express my shock and awe at Aldemar’s assessment of his hijo.] In the background we see Erlinda’s complete collection of nearly identical dolls with nearly identical but differently colored dresses, all of which look pretty Castiliana and though they aren’t what we in education call “age-appropriate,” they are definitely Erlinda-appropriate. Erlinda looks about as good as we’ve seen her, which ain’t sayin’ much, but she still has the 10-year old hairstyle. The blouse is definitely tight so if Juan’s gonna notice, it’s now or never. Aldemar babbles on. He admits that now that the kids look close to settling down (sentar la cabeza), he’s thinking about taking up with someone and looking for love in all the right places. Someone to warm his feet in the night (una mujer que me caliente las patas en la noche), for the years that remain. Erl kisses him; he deserves it and that would make her happy. He chuckles that some lucky gal deserves him, too. She asks if he’s got his eye on anyone? Aldemar’s spent years circling the town like a buzzard over the ravines, and he has someone in his sights—does she know whom? Doña Delfina! And this very night he’s going to give it his best shot (le echo bala – I fire a shot). Erl tells him that’s good….but we have our doubts…..

Ana is surprised that Paula has called to say she’s not coming home to sleep. Does Mami have some objection, Paula wonders? Nooooo. She’s not a child any more. She is staying with her HUSBAND, after all. Aside from the fact that it’s legal, it looks like that’s what Paula wants, huh? Paula affirms it is, but she has her arms crossed so her body language makes us wonder, too. She just didn’t want Mami to worry. Ana cautions Paula and reminds her that CL doesn’t fight fair (I think that’s what it was, but if not, someone fill in). Paula protests and Ana agrees she’s right, Ana shouldn’t be messing in her life. Consuelo is still taking notes. Paula tells Mami just not to worry if she arrives muuuuch later and bids her goodbye. She smiles and hangs up, oblivious to Consuelo scuttling off like a big cockroach when the light comes on.

The party will be grand indeed; outside and inside are both decorated and the local band is lively. Town folk stream in for the festivities. Juan’s voice is heard welcoming them as we note that the Tweedles probably will be happy with the spread. Juan looks it over and straightens trays of delicacies while Erl and the Tweedles talk behind him; Erl’s gaze is trained on Juan’s…..back. Juanito greets folks with a handshake, watching hopefully for his special guest—la Maestra with the lovely smile! Here she is! And she’s got a little peck on the cheek for Juanito, whose eyes glaze over as we hear a bell ring while his angel moves on. She is resplendent in pink; surely she is the prettiest schoolmarm in the world. Delfi flirts by fanning herself, and exclaims to Anga that Juan’s not the only one cutting a fine figure (all dressed up, echando tiros), look at Anga himself! Anga is indeed; his suit is very distinguished with a white shirt and tie, and his hat sets it off nicely. She’s lovely in a striking red dress and has hair decorated to complement the dress with a red and gold bow. Anga gives her an expansive compliment about certain ladies who are just impressing/overwhelming anyone there, which makes her smile coquettishly. She responds “thank you for the compliment, future husband,’ which makes Anga choke on his refreshments (a shot of tequila among other things). She asks about setting the date, and he bolts down the last of the tequila. If she tells him when and where, he’ll be there!

Molondrón and Juanito wind their way through the crowd to Juan; Molondrón tells Juan that the guests are pretty much all here, and the party crashers (gorrones-spongers), too. Molondrón indicates that this party’s going to be a real success (the plaza will be too small). Juan points out that the idea is to make some noise. They chitchat about the details and the party, and talk about who’s paying—Anga, just go ask him, Molondrón and he’ll pay. Molo is not thrilled. Why should he be the one? He urges Juan to do it. Juan gives in, and Susana comes in calling out to Juan. She, too, is pretty in pink. Erl and Herbierto take note, neither thrilled with her greeting to Juan. Juan, however, thought bubbles to the blessed God. What he’s seen in this life convinces him he won’t need to go to heaven. She chuckles and smiles, greeting him, and Juan is as glazed as his son was with the teacher. Juan can only thought bubble and salivate with his jaw hitting the floor. Susana looks around while Erl hovers, irritated and worried, in the background (and looking pretty darn nice herself). Susana is worried that there’s a problem, but having seen none, turns back to Juan who tells her there’s no problem—it’s just that tonight she looks positively spectacular and like a beauty queen. He leans close to tell her the last part quietly. She thanks him shyly and tells him how handsome he is as well. His eyes get big. (In addition to the snakeskin boots noted before, he has black jeans, and his black ten-gallon hat has a white snakeskin-looking band on it, his vest is black leather-looking fabric or satin, with a yoke design of black and white snakeskin print. His shirt is dark pink and white paisley design and reminds one of Aloha Friday on ‘Oahu, which should really clash noisily with the vest, but Juan tends to pull off most outfits with minimal visual distress to the viewer. My hubby says that’s just because we gals are so enamored of his looks, it doesn’t matter what he has on. Or off. Hubby says he’s about the only guy who can pull off wearing a pink shirt, too. That’s a quote.) Susana’s going off to greet folks and they’ll chat later. They lean in coquettishly to each other; Molo is observing with pleasure and Erl and T1 with intense irritation. Susana is a picture of high fashion, which Juan just has to note to Molo as she walks off and we get a view of her departing derriere, clad beautifully in a long black skirt (to go with that pink v-neck sleeveless top), and with a lovely pink and multi-colored floral design that doesn’t overwhelm the eye. Speaking of top, Susana has never ONCE worn anything that could be described as over-the-top. This is refreshing, though it probably doesn’t appeal as much to our male viewers. Juan thought bubbles; who would have thought it! The opening of his office! And with all the notable folks of the town. He fondly touches Juanito’s little face as we see Anga, Delfi and Susana chat with the police chief. Juan continues that there are all the civil authorities and religious leaders….we see Aldemar with the priest. The Tweedles and Erl keep close watch over Juan in the background; T2 is the man in black tonight, looking menacing and probably feeling menacing as well. Juan thinks that only one thing could have improved this lovely event, if Kike, Fernando, the Cachones, and of course, his little dove could be there. He mourns how his heart aches just to say her name, but pastes a smile on as he rests his hands on Juanito’s shoulders.

Moni is getting the scoop from Consuelo. Consuelo hasn’t called because nothing new has happened, but tonight there’s a new development. What happened? Paula came over for dinner and they’re having a slumber party! What? She accepted? Yep. Laura comes in to hear the conversation. Well, Consuelo continues, at first she was nervous, but she’s staying. She regrets to tell Moni that they seem a bit exited (animadones, high-spirited, encouraged) about it. Moni thanks her and asks for updates. Consuelo apologizes, she just thought Moni should know the truth. She tells Moni to have a good evening. As if.

Moni hangs up and turns sadly to Laura, giving in to her heartbreak again. Laura wonders about that expression; what’s up? Moni doesn’t want to talk about it. She runs to her room and collapses against the wall in tears, trying to keep herself from screaming with the pain, and tears running down her cheeks.

The Odd Couple and the sleazy software pirate have to discuss business while they eat in Gutis’ apartment. The SSP has a catalog to use in the demos they’ll do for Farell; what? It’s in ENGLISH! The boys scoff at Perafán, what, he doesn’t know the dominant language? Nope, he only knows Zapoteco (El idioma zapoteco (diidzaj), hablado por 785.000 personas en Oaxaca y otros lugares…The language of the Zapotec Indians, spoken by 785,000 people in Oaxaca and other places, etc.—from Wikipedia ....This sounds like a real politically incorrect cultural slur to us, doesn’t it?). Perafán is irritated. The boys continue to scoff and pick on Perafán. [Couldn’t happen to a better person. And, it probably wouldn’t happen to a better person.] He retorts and asks them to puh-leeze put their drinks on coasters. He thumps the SSP’s beer onto a coaster to demonstrate. It’ll mark up the table. Gutis doesn’t give a rip and it’s his table. Don’t get so steamed, you’re my GUEST. Delirio is steamed, though. He points out he knows this is a little joke for them to pass the time. For him, it’s his livelihood (his job) they’re discussing. With all due pomposity, he declares that at noon tomorrow the boys are going to present about the virtues and advantages of the software. In front of the big boss and the terrible little toupeed man. The boys choke and point to themselves and each other in total alarm. Us, no way!??!! Yes, YOU, sirs. The SSP confesses he really doesn’t know a whole lot about computers. [Sheesh. He’s not even a good software pirate.] Gutis insults his buddy [feel free to translate what he actually said, anyone, “era distribudador de maranilla adulterada” I hate to think what it might mean, I am a schoolmarm, after all]. Delirio yells about his fate; what’s he gotten mixed up in! Gods of Olympus! It’s a tragedy! He throws his towel down and throws himself onto the sofa.

Susan and Juan happily watch the festivities while Molo asks Erl if she wants something to drink. She turns from her careful scrutiny of Juan and Susana to politely decline. Molo is disappointed. He asks if she wants to play and she whips around—PARDON? Molo corrects himself, does she want to dance? With who? Molo sighs in frustration while Juan and Susana share a private laugh and Erl glares at them. Well, Molo retorts gently, with ME. Erl turns back to him and declines politely—maybe a little later. Molo’s disappointment is tangible. Susana’s and Juan’s happy moment is about to burst. Here comes Tweedle 1. He greets them and asks if he could have the honor (of a dance). Susana whips back to Juan and says that she’s spoken for, right? Right? Juan jumps in, oh, yeah, we’re dancing. They rush out to the floor and cut a rug to the local band’s rendition of cachi-cachi bombon. Juanito dances over to his beloved teacher, his little hands mimicking Papi’s. Erl sends fiery darts at Susana and Juan who are still whooping it up as Aldemar decides to strike while the iron is hot. He crosses the floor to invade Anga’s space. But, he decides better of it when he sees how closely Anga has Delfi while they dance. He culls Erl out of the herd and asks qué the heck is she doing dancing with “that one” when she’s really supposed to whispering sweet nothings (engatusar-sweet-talking) to Juan? She glares at Papi since there’s nothing else for her to do at the moment.

Molo crosses the floor, and Anga cuts away from Aldemar to ask what’s wrong, and why is Aldemar meddling between Molo and Erl? [That’s nice, Anga is taking up for Molo. Maybe he’s decided Molo’s not such a bad bet since he worked so hard on cleaning that office.] Molo laments that Don Alde doesn’t want her dancing with Molo, only with Juan. “And you know what? He’s right. I’m a good for nothing. (muerto de hambre).” Anga won’t let him put himself down [there’s a new twist!] and tells him to cut it out, he’s going to make Anga mad. He gives Molo a short pep talk. Meanwhile, Aldemar has seized his advantage; he culls Delfi out of the herd for a short face to face. In a quiet place. Delfi doesn’t understand what’s so urgent as he draws her outside. Why is he so quiet right now, too? He says he’s even amazed himself. It’s been several Aprils since he exercised those functions. It’s not as easy as it used to be. Delfina, like us, is mystified. Qué the heck? What functions? He tries to explain delicately—functions of the human body (organism, double entendre implied because it sounds like Humanitarian Organization). He shrugs, and maybe she’ll get it. She wonders if he means he’s working in the United Nations on human rights kinds of stuff. He tries to clarify again for our Delfi, who isn’t even a blonde. He tells her he’s talking about united souls! Delfi begins to get it. He continues that when folks reach a certain age, stage of widowhood or widowerhood, etc., well, their bodies aren’t in the bloom of youth, but they might still have a few lively vices (spirited “bad habits” - resabios jacarandosos). He leans over to breathe on her neck, almost whispering. Delfi is getting it. “Don Aldemar, are you declaring your love to me?” She’s so perceptive, he tells her, raising her hand for a kiss. He looks at her lovingly while she ponders this. [Not to put too fine a point on it, Delfi, but don’t you already have one proposal of marriage on the table—the one you made to Anga?]

Back inside, Anga is still giving Molo encouragement. Susana is enchanted; she’s never seen a party quite like it! [No doubt.] Juan assures her this is because of the commitment the People of Achichipico have to the project. She’s wondering why he isn’t making a little speech to them. Why should he do that, Juan wonders? She tells him is customary at an inauguration to say a few words to the guests, make a toast. Juan, every the big talker, thinks he’s not much of a public speaker. She scoffs fondly. Of course he can do this! He’s an artist with words! Could it be that he has a little stage fright? What, me? Juan launches into it with gusto. He stops the band, and makes his speech. Tweedle Dumb wants to know what this clown is going to do now? [Talk about the pot calling the kettle black!] Casimiro thinks he’s pulled it all off so far, and Susana’s on board (he’s brought her along like a hobbled horse—garrapata, a disabled horse, but hobbled means he’s taming her down with the right restraint system so I’m loosely interpreting). Herbierto protests. It’s because Juan’s the host (anfitrión) and has to have her at his side. Tweedle Dee scoffs at his reasoning. They get up to listen. Juan welcomes the dignitaries by position. He promotes the priest to cardinal, which makes the priest gasp in pleasure but he corrects Juan, though he appreciates the promotion. He welcomes them all on behalf of himself and his partners. He wants to express his gratitude that they have all come to share this historic event for their town. They all cheer and clap. Except the Tweedles. Juan thought bubbles; he’s taken up the challenge with the heavies of the community tonight. But he realizes his words aren’t sitting well with Herbierto, whose arms are crossed and facial expression grim. Juan continues to thought bubble while we see him utter profundities to the crowd, judging by their rapt expressions. [If anyone wants to translate his thought bubble, I could use the help. It only marginally made sense to me.] The crowd claps again.

Among those not clapping are Delfi and Aldemar, who are still messing around outside. [Okay, not literally messing around.] Aldemar is still declaring his intentions; he wants to heap attention on her, give her things, and in general be head over heels in love. She says how nice that is for her, because guys aren’t many of the old-fashioned gentlemen around. [Delfi, qué the heck? You’re engaged! But, we have to keep in mind she IS Nidia’s cousin. Blood will tell.] He tells her he’s from the last century [but we knew that, judging by how he is with his kids.] Conservative but with the strength of a mule. Aldemar continues with his words of love and she giggles at the idea. He reaches for her, and she has the grace to jump back, hold on a minute. This is all happening pretty fast. [Yep, especially given that you already have a fish in the pan.] He tries to coax her trust in him. She points out this was pretty disconcerting and unexpected. He tells her how lovely she is, and she postures but pushes him away. He tells her he doesn’t want just a torrid passion. [??!!! Uh-huh.] She’s worth the trouble of gambling his life on her. She looks shocked by the idea and tells him he’s not the only guy who has his hopes set on her. He’s confident he’ll win her favor, though. A Chávez always welcomes rivals. The only thing he asks is that she lets him formally present himself to her, and let him be the official candidate. Or, would he be wasting his time? She hedges…..and squirms….

The Tweedles may not be enjoying the total ambiance, but the tequila suits them. Tweedle Dumb is telling his fellow Tweedle how disgusted he is that the greatest liar in the history of Achichipico is getting by with all this. But, the big-talker falls quicker than a guy with a limp [more politically incorrect Herbiertoisms.] Casimiro points out it ain’t happenin’ yet, and Herbierto asserts that Juan’s gonna take a fall, wait and see. Casimiro looks disgusted with his blockhead bud.

Susana loved Juan’s speech. He kisses her hands as Anga, Juanito and Molo look on. Juan thinks critics feel he might have gone on a little long, huh? Juanito’s little head nods in agreement. Susana acknowledges it Might Have Been a Little Long, but his reasons were sincere. He wonders if his words might have caught her attention (calaron, which doesn’t mean exactly this but the context dictates it), and she agrees that his words profoundly caught her attention. He handles the language to perfection. Read that: Juan can hablablablabla. Juanito makes that little chin-rubbing gesture he sees his Papi making all the time. The Tweedles toss back a pair of shots and look more determined than ever.

Outside, Aldemar and Delfi continue their dialogue; she’s told him from the beginning that she’s open to a respectable deal, but she’s not giving a definite yes. [We hope not.] Aldemar utters some more sweet nothings; he’ll wait and it’ll give him a reason to live. She tells him they’d better get inside, because the town gossips will go to town with this. Off Delfi goes, mincing….gee, that looks familiar. He calls her back with another proposal. After the fiesta is done, how about they go off someplace private—her house-- and get more deeply acquainted? [Yes, he DID use the word deeply – a fondo, deep, bottom, which can also mean bed, like a river bed. DOM.] She reluctantly agrees. He reminds her above all he’s a gentleman. She smiles….

Susana plays with Juan’s hat while Juan saunters over to the food table where he finds Erl. She makes a snide comment and he tells her he’s offended. She makes another snide comment, this time about “that Susana.” Juan pours himself a shot. He says he’s not looking for Susana, he’s looking for Erl’s father. Has she seen him? Nope. He went out a while ago with Delfi. To talk or what? She explains that according to her Papi, he’s looking for a woman to warm his feet at night. He starts to complain and Erl points to the door, where Delfi is mincing in with a smug Aldemar trailing. Juan looks downright distressed.

Marely comes down the stairs, puzzled at Nidia dusting knick-knacks in the living room. Qué the heck? Nidia tells Marely she’s cleaning, what does it look like? It never occurs to that Maria to do it. Maria? Yes, I’ve been thinking of letting her go. I’ve been patient, but this is too much. Marely tries to explain that Maria’s been gone from this house for ten years or so. Nidia doesn’t believe her and tells her fine, let me do my thing and you go do yours. I’m waiting for your father to get home, so Marely tries another tack. She wants to show Nidia something (we notice a sculpture/painting of a nude hanging over the fireplace that really hasn’t gotten a lot of air time up until now; but Nidia turns around from dusting it as Marely speaks). Marely runs off.

Molo calls everyone to attention and sings about the woman of his dreams. Erl smiles fondly at him; is there hope? Juanito sighs with pleasure and his teacher claps while she smiles broadly. Juanito glazes with a stare at her. Molo sings about his lover and the priest looks scandalized and crosses himself. The crowd listens raptly as Molo sings….Juanito struts over to his teacher, who is standing Very Close to the police chief—Susana and Juan exchange a look-they’re getting a kick out of Juanito’s strut. Juanito puts his elbow out for his teacher to link her hand through it and she smiles fondly and complies. Juan thought bubbles about his boy—here he looks like Juan in his 20s. Juan’s beginning to understand why Juanito can’t wait to get to school every day. Juan waxes eloquent to himself about how that first love affects us all.

Marely has fetched the family album. She tells Nidia to take this as calmly as she can; Nidia remarks “what a mystery!” She’s seen the family album lots of times. Marely explains that Nidia thinks they’re trying to give her problems, but Nidia really needs to see this for herself. Whoops, it’s the latest one; Nidia opens with a picture of her wedding to Alirio. Nidia is in shock. This gal looks just like her! Marely sighs; it IS you. Nidia thinks it’s a costume party, but Marely retorts gently that it’s her wedding day. Nidia cannot believe it….her, married to this LICENCIADO? [It always sounds like a curse word when she says it about Delirio.] Nidia can’t believe she could have done such a thing. Where’s Samuel in all this? Marely gets teary and explains that he’s dead, a suicide. Nidia is impactidissima. If there is such a word.

CL waits in bed for Paula, shiny royal blue jammies and all. Paula, on the other hand, looks much better in his shirt than she does in any of her own clothes. It covers way more, too. He tells her to excuse him, but she’s absolutely divine. She thinks she’d look better in her jammies. CL doesn’t care; she looks best in his bedroom. She gets into bed with him, uncomfortable, and he turns to talk…about her not getting the wrong idea. He didn’t ask her to stay to…..um…..she understands. “Until tomorrow” they tell each other awkwardly. He turns back to her yet again; could he give her a little good night kiss? Sure, one. Would she let him give her another? Yeah. She laughs. He comes back and she smiles at his game—would you let me give me the final one? The last one and that’s it. Ya. She chuckles, doesn’t tell him yes, but doesn’t push away, either. He kisses her again and it’s apparently not really the last one. He goes at her neck and we are left to try and figure out what her facial expression says—discomfort? Lust? Thinking of Juan? They get on in earnest and Paula looks like she might go with the program, stroking his back with her long fingers and recently-done nails. We are reminded that any similarity to real life is purely coincidental.

Quickly we hear cachi-cachi bombon, and a voice over informs us that the Familia P. Luche is the funniest on television. Apparently, the announcer has never seen Nidia and Delirio.

Monday: Will Paula give in or will her willpower kick in? Will Moni kick something or someone? Will Juan and Susana survive the assaults of the Chávez?


Vocabulary –

Estar al tanto de todo - on the ball there (but in this case, keep someone well-informed, my loose translation)
Guateque—party or binge
Pizpireta – spirited girl, lively girl
Escotado – low cut, cut to fit
Holgazán – lazy
Brutote – stupid or rough, rough around the edges
Una mujer que me caliente las patas en la noche – a woman who warms my feet in the night
Le echo bala – give it my best shot (lit. I fire a shot, I will fire a shot)
Echando tiros – all dressed up, cutting a fine figure, doing something extremely well
Gorrones – party crashers/spongers
Engatusar – sweet-talking
resabios jacarandosos – spirited or lively bad habits, lively vices

Labels: Juan