Caray, Caray!

*Rod Stewart

Shout out to "Jean" tonight Querida Enemiga recapper your title inspired me

Okay so it isn’t the bard…

Thank you Rod Stewart for that squeeky 70’s lyric….Geez how many lil Lina’s out there bought into that lameass song, I mean besides me?


Okay we last we left our little group of friends,
Mili was mournfully looking at the stellar penthouse Hugo bought her for when they marry..
Rocky was lying dashed against the plush grass of the Belmonte grounds…
Lina was being seduced by a devil…
Karla was trying to seduce a devil…
Luci was living large and doing me amors with Nestor in a restaurant getting all jiggy with it…
In walks Al & Flor, eeek…

Now then I’ll start with the Al/Nestor/Luci/Flor, Okay Al sees them getting all tonsil hockey in the restaurant, which is kinda squeeky as eeeewww that is your Mom and that isn’t your Dad. Only it really is his Dad, only he doesn’t know it, which is okay cause even if it was your Dad, there is something disquieting about seeing people above prom age making out in public. Yeah, we and all the rest of the patrons of that eating establishment get it, but come on you got a 36-hour window for those unexpected interruptions. Get a room like any descent cheating couple. Al does the “Mami?”. Egads Luci has the busted look on her face, Flor has the “Gee I didn’t have a clue” look on her face, Nestor greets Al with that creepy way of his. Luci borrows Al for a moment.

Meanwhile, Karla now is dancing like a belly dancer for Damien. Damien no longer seems amused, well amused maybe but he can barely keep his eyes open. I’m not sure if he has the “Cura” of Karla that is or if he has driven down that road so many times, the rolling hills no longer hold any attraction. He says he can’t he and he tells Satan to leave as he must serve God. Karla says serve me….

I must say someone came to the door---no not in the TeleNovela---in real life, so I don’t know if Damien blessed her in that special way or not. I don’t think so.

Now then Mami & Al talk, she says she is leaving Const, which is a-okay with Al as he sees how happy her little face is and how after all these years she deserves happiness. Yeah maybe if she hadn’t totally screwed you over.

Mili doesn’t want to leave the Mansion, they are like her family, her friends. Gee can’t they just get married and continue to have separate rooms and lives. Hugo says will be their chance to be happy, she will be away from the suffering of loving her not brother and the snotty comments of Flor. This is their big chance. Mili so is not on board with this.

Now for the real tragedy of the evening, our little dateless Lina is in the seduction den of Whatever the Hell his name is, that friend of Matt the Ratt. Little Lina looks very pretty and so happy to actually have a male paying attention. Now then if this was a cartoon AssHat Boy would be the cigarette smoking wolf in a zoot-suit. Lina spills her drink and starts to clean it up. Wolfboy says she must be addicted to cleaning. They start making out and the ever active left paw is caressing her thigh. She tries to slow things down, but the far more experienced RatBastard is all charm and promises, she is so beautiful, she is the only woman for him, yes the cursed TeleNovela words come next. We are Novios.

Now in the kitchen, Rocky, Val, Horacito, & Socorrito stand around. Rocky can’t talk cause he has a neck brace and a wrap around his jaw and his arm is in a sling. Val dismisses the others and lays down the law to Rocky. She could not stand it if he died. Mumble Mumble (Rocky can’t talk..oh the comedy never ends), he is a very important part of her life, but it has to stop, he has to leave her in peace. She was willing to loose everything for him, her family, her house, her wealth and he broke her heart into a million pieces he must stop and leave her alone. Mumble, Mumble, just shut-up and listen. Val continues, you took money from my father and broke my heart, never again never. Mumble, Mumble, “You were the love of my life, but you were my biggest mistake” Oh Snap, Val leaves and we see the swollen face of Rocky all dismal and conflicted.

Now over at Seduction Central.
OH NO, Lina is in bed with RatBastard…
She is going on and on and on about how wonderful it was. The sensations made her feel like she had ants crawling all over her.

P.S.A. Hey kids if you just did the deed with someone and you feel like you have ants crawling all over your skin, Google “Body Lice”, “Scabies” or “Crabs” and follow instructions.---

That said, we go back, now AssHat looks like he has ants crawling all over him. Lina continues to talk..Now we can go to the movies, dinner have great fun. AssHat says it is late and he has a busy day tomorrow. Lina thinks he is joking and wants to snuggle. He just wants to see her Ass going out the door.
He tells her he will call a cab for her. Oh No, there is suddenly a cloud starting to cover Lina’s happy state of true love, rainbows and friendly unicorns. She says something about the next night and he say’s lets see. Will you call. Sure, sure. He hands her money, for the cab and something a little extra. Oh Okay Lina gets it. Dude you are a RatBastard.

Next Day, Karla is chiding Lina who is laying under the covers. She says she is sick and doesn’t want to get up. Karla thinks she partied too hardy. Gloria tells her to back off. Karla leaves and Gloria tries to talk to Lina, but she tells Gloria to leave her alone.

Gloria and Mili get the truth out of Lina. Mili is angry. Okay RatBastard, you are so going to get an ass-kicking. Mili knew what was coming cause Sister Chunky warned her about going to a guys apartment. Lina finishes her little tale of humiliation by concluding he gave her extra money like she was a common…well you know.

Damien is collecting $ in a can for street kids, Sister Chunky is on the street with him. He says he has to go to the bano. He takes his can and leaves.

Bobby comes in to see Al, back at Mansion de Misery. He says Brau said Lina was sick. How is she. Hugo is also there and here comes Flor and Al. Flor is all like congrats on the new digs. Now we have to look at the pained look on Al’s face when he finds out his “Sister” is leaving the Misery to live in the new digs with Hugo. Oh it is all for the best. How come Al doesn’t pay one bit of attention to Val, oh yeah cause he isn’t hawt for her.
Al turns to leave with Bobby and Flor won’t let him leave without a kiss. Yes he has that pained look on his face. Mili now tells Hugo she has to run an errand for Lina. Hugo says give me a kiss…ha ha ha snarking on Flor.

I kind of feel sorry for Hugo, like I wish Mili would realize how much Hugo loves her (and he does look much hotter and is doing a good job at work and has been a good boy for a long time, which considering what a psycho he was is indeed saying a lot). Of course we don’t know what ever happened to that crazy Al Cast off that went to Spain with him, hmmmmmmm.

Now then Padre shows up at the house, looking for Damien. Consti calls the Casino. Yep that is where our choirboy is located.

Damien is winning big with God’s money. The two confront him. He says he was winning for the Lord. Padre says it is tainted money. Oh Please…Padre, you are a religious man, now do you really think Damien would have won, had God not been shuffling the cards? Oh ye of little faith.
Padre says Damien is out, he can’t be a priest. Geez with all the bad press you people have had….Well just saying.

Matt the Rat is having a toast with RatBastard devirginifier, they are snarking it up and giggling. Okay I get it if you are like seventeen and the big swingin something in the barrio, but good Gawd, these two somewhat effeminate hombres are like thirty. I don’t know readers if you all watched La Fea, but even Fernando and Omar(and yes I still love and admire you Omar), did not pick on the innocent. Well there was that whole ugly Lety thing, but come on…she knew the score and she willingly grabbed the brass whatever.

Mili goes to the law office looking for Matt the Ratt. Gramps is all congratulations on your wedding. He says Mili will get her money. She doesn’t want the money, she just loved Granny. Gramps lawyer says she loved you too. Mili tells Gramps to tell Matt she is looking for him.

Al has a little melt down with Bobby, he doesn’t want Mili to move. He wants to see her face everyday. Damn it is always about Al isn’t it. Poor Bobby has dated your slut sister-in-law for three years and she screwed him over, but hey lets talk about you.

Mili shows up at said sluts apartment. She was fantasizing about Bobby. She loved him so much. Now really if you loved him so much, how did that Matt thing happen. Seriously anemic cardigan wearing Matt. Granted lil Bobby Brady is a tool, but Matt is no step up. Mili comes in and says she is looking for Matt. Mili tells crying slut girl that she is just like her sister, a liar and life ruiner. Thinking she can get points with Bobby, Slut girl tells Mili that she told her sister to come clean and she really loves Bobby. Whatever Mili leaves.

Damien comes back to the Mansion with Consti who says jail or Karla. Oh the pain.
Well I am tired of all this nonsense…dragging things out..
Briefly Damien will play both sides against the middle in the War of the Roses divorce and side with whomever can do him the most good. Damien this is why I love you.

--------------Tomorrow Al finds out, due to the Will of Granny, Mili has to live in the house and Ser Chunky and Mili give RatBastard devirginizer what is coming to him--------

Pretty much I am throwing everything into the Val/Rocky romance….I am so over Al & Mili. Now we have to wait til the kid is born and months more dragging…..

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