Caray, Caray!

Hi everyone. I think sometimes I take liberties with translations, especially slang. If you have other ideas or know other or better ways of phrasing these things please let me know. After all, we are here to learn, right?

Here is my name and nickname key:

Monita = Moni = Valentina = Val
Mauricio = Mau
Constanza = Consti
Gabriela = Gabi
Ximena = Xime


Maid Teresa fills Monita in on Mau's sad background. His wife died in an accident and in typical TN fashion his poor wife was pregnant. This effectively put an end to his accelerating career as a race car driver. Monita's says judging by the way he drives he's still racing. Maid asks Monita why she's so interested in the patrón. Moni protesteth too much and huffs off to Aldo's room.

Moni walks in on Aldo who is in his undies trying to repair a lamp. Heh, he covers his manhood with a big pillow but he's no Ed Yanez sez Moni. She tries to fix the lamp, plugs it in, it sparks, she throws it on the bed and the bed catches fire.

Constanza and Mauricio argue because she spilled the beans to Ximena about him adopting. When they arrive home they are greeted by fire engines in front along with his extended family plus Monita; they seem to be in a daze but physically fine. They report that luckily Ricardo and Aldo put out the fire which only burned Aldo's pillow and mattress.

Of course Mau tells them them it's OK and Moni should calm down. Aldo kisses Moni and thanks her, not sure why. Thank you for burning my bed? For comparing me to Ed Yanez? Moni says she's headed home and she thanks Mau for understanding which pisses off Constanza. Ricardo the chauffeur gets to drive her home. Will it be her real home or the fake place?

At their favorite restaurant Geronimo gossips with Ximena about Mau's probs with Consti. Ximena might be naturally spacy but tonight she's also slightly tipsy.

Slimy guy Bonillo calls Geronimo from a pay phone a few steps away. (What, he doesn't have a cell phone?) Bonillo asks how will Mario be able to give him money if he keeps hanging out in expensive places? Geronimo looks around and sees Bonillo smirking like a ferret (if ferrets could smirk) just outside the room.

Consti wants Mau to fire Monita but he refuses. Why should he just because she nearly burned down his house, it was an accident. Consti tries bitchiness and when that doesn't work she tries another tack, she's just worried about him and doesn't know how to treat the sweet kiddies, sniff sniff. She's gonna go home cuz the burny smell makes her nauseous. (Uh oh...NAUSEOUS???)

Over at the jail Snow brown tries to get sweet sonny Betito out of jail but the desk cop says no way lady he can't leave until tomorrow, sorry but justice is blind. Snow says justice is also slow. Some guy bumps her with pizza boxes. Gee, I wonder who the pizza is for? Betito, king of the jail, has charmed everyone and holds court with the police, the guards and the inmates who are all hanging out in his cell. Desk cop tells Beto his mom was there and maybe he should go home. His fans convince him to stay just one more hour.

Ricardo the chauffeur drops Moni off at her fake house and says he has instructions to walk her inside. They bicker good naturedly and Ric finally gives her a kiss on the cheek and sez she's special. Who should walk by but Nieves with cara impactada.

As Ximena and Geronimo leave the expensive restaurant she spies Bonillo driving off and goes nuts cuz he's the handsome dude she was telling her bro about, that festival of extreme manly hotness (which is how I translate un festival de galanura). Geronimo tells her he's the guy that got the boot and he's probably going after Ximena only to bug him. He tells her if she thinks it was love at first sight she must have fallen from the cradle too many times because her neurons aren't firing. (Siblings can be so cruel.)

Monita gets back to the barrio and gives Estrella the brief on her big night. Nieve arrives and pouts a bit as she tells Monita that Beto is still in jail. Nieve cheers herself up a bit by insulting Estrella.

Aha...Bonillo is waiting for Ximena when she gets home. She suggests they remove their masks, yes there was a brutal chemistry between them when they met, but if he wants more she needs him to look her in the eyes and know he's being sincere with her. Is he with her to bug her bro? He responds by laying a big fat kiss on her. She pulls away and he pants, "If you trust me call me," and hands her his card. She nibbles at it and swoons.

Nieve is trying to telecommute with aliens via a circular radome on her head. Oh sorry, it's a large roller which, based on her prior hairstyle, serves no purpose whatsoever. She gives Monita a hard time because she saw her with Ricardo. Monita assures her the guy is only a coworker and it was only a little peck goodbye. Nieve starts to scold and at that moment Beto arrives, surprise!! However he wants to know why Nieve thinks Moni will hurt him. They make up a story that Monita wants to stop fighting. Beto cheerfully tells them no way and he wants his Mona to show up at the gym tomorrow to rendezvous with Don Cesár.

Next morning Constanza waits for Monita to get off the bus. She confronts her about the previous night and says the kids could have died due to Moni's ineptitude. If she has any shame she'll resign at once.

Monita runs into the building in tears. She tells Paula she is a disaster as a secretary and she's going to resign and be managed by Don Cesár the big manager of all the boxeadoras and be a champion in Las Vegas. Paula doesn't want to see Monita with a face full of bruises or taken to Vegas by the freeloader Beto. The phone interrupts them; Moni will deliver two cappuchinos to Mauricio and then resign.

Mau tells Salvador that he will have to have lunch with the gringos alone, Mau is a father now. The smarmy gringo arrives and totally leches over Monita. Isn't it funny how gringos are portrayed in these shows? How I wish it were patently false. Gringo suggests that Mau invite the muchacha to dine with them. Monita slaps the gringo hand away and asks what's up with this churlish blonde guy?

Geronimo and Ximena discuss the orphans while they breakfast on the ubiquitous orange juice. He's concerned because if the orphans are legally adopted then they could usurp Geronimo and Ximena's inheritance in the event something were to "happen" to Mauricio. Ximena seems uncomfortable with this conversation.

Her cell rings and as she rummages through her rummage sale of a purse Geronimo whines some more about the lost inheritance. The call is from her good friend Consti who is in a funk from sorting through the horrible mess at Mau's house. While asking Ximena to go shopping with her Consti grabs the distasteful photo of the orphan's mom and throws it in the wastebasket. (I dare anyone to try to suggest this isn't deliberate maliciousness. I dare ya!) Geronimo tells Ximena he wants to know absolultely everything about those snot-nosed brats, what time to they go to bed, what time do they get up, what are they allergic to, but above all else where do they work? Ximena is incredulous, "Where do they work?" She looks at Geronimo like he's the one who fell out of the cradle too many times.

Monita has been at work less than thirty minutes and already Mau is giving her the first time-out of the day. He tells Gabriela to keep an eye on Moni while he goes back to the disgusting gringo.

Mau introduces Salvador as his right hand man. Billy the gringo wants to talk biz but first can they bring him the girl to sit on his lap? (I say do it and let's see what happens.) Salvador mutters that the Yankee is quite the horndog. Mau scowls.

Meanwhile Gabriela tells Moni it's not all the gringo's fault, Moni is partially to blame because of the slutty way she dresses. (Gabi, you are SO last century!) Gabi nastily instructs Moni to NOT make a scene, no she cannot interrupt Mau from his important meeting, and please behave while Gabi works on her schedule.

Consti continues to pretend-clean and tells Teresa to wash all the kid's clothes and throw away this little bag of trash (which we know holds the one and only pic of their dear, departed mama). She keeps waving her hands around like they are covered in filth and then she wipes her hands on her bosom. Weird.

Aldo goes into his room, sees that things have been moved about, and notices that mama's pic is missing.

Meanwhile Ximena is in the living room bonding with the orphan girls and asking them to call her Auntie Xime. Consti grumpily tells her to stop the cute talk otherwise the kids will never respect her. Tia Xime doesn't care, she wants to teach the girls how to shop. Aldo bursts in and demands to know where in the hell is the picture of his mother? Consti tries to brush by him but he demands "Did you touch the picture of my mother, yes or no?"

Over at Sermona Geronimo gives Salvador and Gabi a hard time for not telling him about Mau adopting the kids. They give him the brush-off and he mutters that they are in a conspiracy against him.

Monita exits the ladies room and is accosted by Billy the horny goat. He asks for a little kiss and she punches him out. I guess you could say she cured his hot c**k with a coldcock, hee hee. Mau runs up "What did you do?" and Moni resigns on the spot.

Mau is incredulous and says the gringo is worth millions to them. Moni says she punched his client, burned his house, he would be better of without her.

Consti and Aldo have a yelling match and are finally interrupted by Teresa who has found the picture that landed in the trash "by mistake". Tia Xime wants to apply the shopping cure to their wounded feelings but Aldo refuses. Consti cries her crocodile tears and rushes out, she only wanted to get to know them! The orphan sisters scold Aldo for making her cry.

Moni sprints away in her high heels and escapes on the bus while Mau frantically looks around.

Back in Sermona Mau, Gabi and Sal discuss their problem lying supine at their feet. Sal spots Geronimo listening to them and warns them that the walls have ears. Mau instructs Gabi to hunt down Moni so he can talk to her.

Billy slowly gets to his feet and Mau is interrupted by a call from the weeping Consti. He must come home immediately because Aldo insulted her and she felt he was on the verge of hitting her! She is afraid to leave the room for fear of running into him. What a lying beeeyatch. Mau leaves without signing the contract.

Moni shows up to the gym in her dress and heels but Don Cesar doesn't seem to mind. He wants to support her career and earn them millions in Vegas.

Consti waits with Ximena in Mau's room. When she sees him arrive she pinches her eyes to make it look like she was crying and tells Xime to keep quiet and contradict nothing. She cries on Mau's shoulder that Aldo was terrible, he insulted her and ruined the perfect day she had planned. However behind Consti's back Ximena wags her finger and shakes her head so Mau will know Consti is lying. Hooray Ximena! Consti keeps wailing while Mau tells her to lower her voice.

His phone rings and it's Salvador, nobody knows anything about Monita. Mau tells Gabi he doesn't care how but she must find Monita!

Don Cesar inspects Moni's sore hand and says it's her ligaments. He aks Monita does she want to return to the ring or not? Beto answers of course she does! Cesar says he can teach her to hit with her left, once they get to LV nothing can stop them. Beto is thrilled and thinks Monita is happy too. She rubs her hand and half-heartedly agrees.

Back at the Biz bossy Gabi asks Paula about her Pal Monita. Paula insists she doesn't know Monita outside of work and denies having her telephone number. What we have here is the classic case of catching flies with honey, which Gabi is not doing.

Aldo defends himself to Mau and explains that sometimes he gets mad and sees red; losing the only pic of his mom set him off. Is Mau going to punish him? Mau asks is Aldo going to ask Consti to forgive him? Aldo is cornered on this one and knows it. Little Daniela runs in and asks if Monita is coming to visit them today, please say yes. Mau looks like he's about to cough up a hairball.

Beto wants to celebrate but Moni isn't in the mood. He's super excited that her career is about to take off and thinks she should be kissing his feet instead of making a yucky face. She tells him her yucky face is because his feet smell! Ah well, he dances away down the sidewalk even though his girlfriend is in a bad mood.

Alone, Monita cries a little. Estrella finds her and Moni tells her she's sad because she's a born loser.


Mañana: Mauricia searches the barrio for Monita. Later he tells a lovely and smiling Monita she has no idea how much he looked for her. Uh oh it looks like this little scene is interrupted by a surprised Beto.


Brutal = killer, awesome
Cara de guácala = yucky face
Un complot en mi contra = a conspiracy against me
Un festival de galanura = a festival of heartthrobs, of extreme male hotness
El gabacho está como deseosón = The yankee is quite the horndog.
Guero desabrido - distateful, vulgar, unpleasant or churlish blonde guy.
Hay pájaros en el alambre = the walls have ears (Lit. there are birds on the wire)
Mocoso = snot-nosed brat

Labels: gancho