Caray, Caray!

Remedios and Jacinta, the Bickersisters, appear to be in a cave, fighting yet again over the "affections" of Federico (whom we know to be as cold as a scorpion and disdainful of both). AN EYE FOR AN EYE A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH quoth Jacinta the serial killer as she rejoices that Federico likes her better.

In Canada, Juanita and Valeria ask: "Have we been deceiving Veronica? No, we've just been omitting to tell her the entire truth." Veronica's other personalities have been flirting with every macho in sight and therefore she is under suspicion... Both Andres and Daniel are coming for graduation, also making sales meetings across Canada for the Maldonado wine operation.

Veronica has three mirrors on her dresser: on the right she wears a bad blond wig, on the left she has a short haircut, in the middle she sees her actual self, wincing with the kind of headache you get when you have multiple personalities fighting with each other over which boy to snag.

In Mexico City, Gustavo and his father-in-law Nicolas have dinner together and Gustavo asks, "Was Maite's mother really as sexy as they say? And is it true you and she got it on?" "Hey, we macho guys can't help it if women come after us. But all my passion turned to rancor when she rejected me." "And there are all those rumors about her in the village." "Yes, pueblo chico, infierno grande. (little town, big hell)" Heh-heh. They agree that many of Maite's problems stem from her mother's reputation. Then Nicolas raises and lowers his eyebrows like Groucho Marx as he tells his local squeeze he'll be back soon to see her again.

Maite has tiresome flashbacks.

There are creepy candles being lit in that dark cave, it must be our serial killer, my favorite character, yes, it's Jacinta, giving thanks to God that he gives her such clear signs about what she should do. Now she prays: "Let the bastard son of Pedro come to me, have him become my son and fill the vacuum left by Adolfo's death. Though I'm sorry to say it, Federico is way better than Adolfo my actual son was. Federico is an authentic Valladolid."

Meanwhile, Remedios is also praying - that her son, that same evil Federico, will prefer her to Jacinta, "after I've done everything for him." She wonders if it was worth trying to "seek justice" for him, i.e. to live with Jacinta in order to secure his inheritance.

While Valeria and Juanita watch a video of happier times on the computer, Veronica "accidentally" knocks over Valeria's precious crystal flower. A flurry of accusations and apologies follow. Veronica, eyes wide: "When did I do it? Just now? Oh, how could it have gotten so late? I forget so much! I don't remember at all! Time passes so fast." Juanita is unforgiving and disbelieving. Valeria says it's ok that her most precious artifact (given by Andres) has been broken.

Unibrow gets his two minutes of airtime. His son asks about "the woman you used to love" and, as Nutria lurks in the shadows hearing every word, Unibrow says "That love is buried. I've been happy with Nutria, she's been a good mother. Of course, I haven't forgotten, some loves you don't forget."

Federico and his mother recap an event I never saw. It sounds like Manola attacked Remedios, then the humble indigenous worker Teodoro came to Remedios' aid, and now she's trying to protect Teodoro from legal action. Federico snarls: "That INDIAN can't work here any more! You prefer Teodoro to me! And Jacinta likes me better than you do!" What substantive, mature conversations these people have.

Unibrow and Nutria are at the doctor's office. The doctor tells Nutria: "No, it's not that you're pregnant, something is wrong, we need to do more tests." Nutria has symptoms - headaches - they're not getting better - uh-oh - she's going to have to die so Maite can end up with Unibrow, what an undeserved fate.

Andres and Daniel prepare for their trip to Canada - the Maldonado wine business is going well and all are pleased. My son Zed commented that Unibrow's brows look like gigantic caterpillars. Unibrow is so incredibly unattractive. Have you noticed how they try to hide his belly behind things?

While the boys go downstairs for brotherly hijinx and reminiscing about their love for Juanita and Valeria - Daniel says of Juanita, me clave grueso, which I think means "It's hit me pretty heavy," - Unibrow and Nutria have a fight. She doesn't want any more medical tests, and says: "You don't love me! You never did! I gave you everything! I lost a child! You love her better! Don't touch me!" Then her headache gets worse, she kind of collapses, he puts her on the sofa and says, "Are you sure you're all right?" a stupid question, of course she isn't, moron. The boys come back up so she can say goodbye and we wonder if they will ever see her again. (Creepy music indicates: no.)

Juanita's pet nun says Juanita should go up to the graduation in Canada, not just to please her granddaughter Valeria, but because the nuns up there, to whom Jacinta has contributed grandly, want to say thanks. The nun suggests that Federico, who speaks English, will do admirably as an escort. Jacinta agrees to make this spur-of-the-moment trip and tell nobody!

Meanwhile, Maite and Victor are celebrating the final paying off of their mortgage, and Victor takes Maite to Air Mexico (nice long product placement) to give her a present - they're both going to the graduation! He's selling his motorcycle to pay for the trip! She's happy. The sign for Air Mexico gets lots of airtime.

Juanita and Valeria are in a play about a nun and an ignorant indigenous woman who is being taught to read. It's incredibly patronizing. Juanita, who is Nahuatl (yeah, and I'm Inuit), is wearing a big red headband and buckskins with fringes. Give. Me. A. Break. Meanwhile, Veronica tells a visitor at the theater: "No, I don't like acting. I don't want to pretend to be a different person." Is this heavy-handed irony?

Daniel and Andres arrive at the school. At the nun's headquarters they (coincidentally) find Veronica, who tells them Valeria and Juanita are still down rehearsing the play. Instead of just going over to the theater, which would eliminate a lot of troubles I am predicting, they leave - telling Veronica to tell V & J they'll be back later. She gets their cellphone number too. At their hotel, they find they may have to make an emergency trip to another province. See, it's starting already!

Jacinta gets to her hotel and Federico goes out.

Veronica has another three-way conversation with herself, decides to be a player among the guapos ("I am good at roulette") and steals Valeria's credit card.

Labels: barrera