Caray, Caray!

Imagine the 10 most eventful minutes of your life.
Now sift together a few other peoples' most eventful ten minutes, plus 20 minutes of your favorite Super Bowl-quality commercials.
I bet that would make for a riveting hour of television.
Alas, this was not that hour.

Just the ladies

The cuartel and Lety are still talking in Lety's office (we don't often get a good look at this part of Presidencia). Lety hints that she has someone in mind for PM's old job and will tell them more later. Sara asks where Alicia will be sitting. Lety looks uncomfortable.

Meanwhile, Marcia gives Alicia the bad news about the new seating arrangements. She'll be sitting next to Martha. Alicia whines and says "you should have let them fire me." Alicia gets hysterical and complains about having to sit among the rabble - bitter Lola, the constipated giraffe, next to Martha's hiding place. She sobs heartily, with dry, invisible tears and blubbers that it's degrading.

Marcia explains that Alicia will be her secretary. This doesn't cheer Alicia up at all. It's like a demotion, going from "secretary of the president" to "secretary of the production executive." Marcia reminds her that she probably wouldn't last very long as Lety's secretary before getting fired anyway. But, she says, if Alicia really finds this so insulting, she can please hand in her resignation. Alicia backpedals a bit and asks if her title could be changed to assistant. She could get a raise and be allowed to boss the rabble. Marcia impatiently nixes this suggestion and tells Alicia she's her secretary, and that's the end of it.

Alicia inquires as to the cuartel's fate. She is outraged that they weren't fired (and in some cases given better jobs). Marcia mentions that they'll be losing a day's pay. Alicia thinks that's the least they deserve. Then Marcia says Alicia's pay is getting docked too. Alicia asks why is Marcia doing this to her, and doesn't Marcia know what this will mean? Marcia says yes, you'll have to catch the early bus so you aren't late again.

Yazmin has been watching all of this in the background while sucking on what looks like a red Blow-Pop or Tootsie-Pop. (When I was a kid, I was told by a friend to check my Tootsie-Pop wrappers for an Indian with a bow and arrow aiming at a star. I was supposed to pierce the star with my lollipop stick and if I could do that without breaking any area outside the star, I'd get a wish. I managed to do this once or twice, but apparently, the love of Shaun Cassidy was too much to wish for.) Yazmin looks like she lost a fight with the clearance rack: orange hot pants and top, with matching handbag; blue denim vest; and cheap-looking gold belt. After Marcia leaves, Yazmin asks Alicia if she can see Lety yet. Alicia slowly turns to Yazmin with a venomous look, perhaps realizing that Yazmin might be the only person she can still safely pick on. Alicia says she doesn't know, and tells Yazmin to go away.

Back in Lety's office, Irma thanks Lety for her fairness and protection. Lety says that's what friends do. They cheer that they're united. Lety asks Lola to stay behind for a talk. The whole cuartel (except Irma) sits down. Irma says no, just Lola. They grumble, but get up to go back to work.

Lola pre-emptively whines. "It never ends. What now?" (Wow, why so negative? She just narrowly avoided getting fired!) Lety says there's a problem with Luigi - a problem Lola knows well. Yazmin! Lola thinks she's worse than a problem - she's a plague, a curse. Lety explains that Luigi is being contrary, like always. He said he'd quit if she didn't hire Yazmin. Lety figures he is just doing this to try her patience and start a fight, but she wanted to talk it over with Lola first. Lola says she understands. Lety says if Lola really can't stand to have Yazmin around, she'll try to find another way to work things out with Luigi, but... Lola interrupts and says it's fine. She can't wait to see the look on that homewrecker's face when Sanchez (Lola's lawyer) wins Lola a big alimony settlement from El Cheque.

Lety says she's glad that Lola feels that way. She'll hire Yazmin, but she assures Lola it won't be exactly what Luigi had in mind. He's going to flip out. Lola and Lety laugh.

Comedy teams of the 20th century

Aldo tells Fern, Omar, and Luigi that his pal Guillermo has lots of contacts in the food business who are interested in advertising their products as part of the gourmet tourism campaign. Fernando is skeptical and pessimistic. Aldo says they're just planting a seed (Fern makes a face), and it'll take time for it to flower. Luigi agrees. Fern ridicules Luigi and says something about watering the seeds and little birds making their nests.

I know we already decided that Fern, Omar, and Tomas are the Three Stooges. However, Fern, Omar, and Luigi can be the Three Stooges too, if Luigi is Shemp. If you add Aldo, that's four people. So then they're the Marx Brothers. And next time we see Omar, Fern, Tomas, Luigi, Aldo, and Lopez all in one place, we'll have Monty Python.)

Guillermo calls. He's met with the restauranteurs, and they've agreed to invest $2 million (that's dollars, not pesos) in the project. Meanwhile, the Three Stooges (Shemp edition) talk. Well, Fern talks. He tells them that this Andreu (Guillermo) guy isn't going to solve anything. What they need for this project is money, and lots of it. Not just lunch money. Omar agrees with Fern. Fern tells them not to be fooled by Aldo's smile. He's just trying to throw them off balance.

Luigi looks like he wants to tell Fern off, but Aldo wraps up the call and the Three Stooges (Shemp edition) move forward to hear the outcome. Aldo reminds them about the seeds. (And the nesting birds, Fern flippantly reminds him.) Aldo says the seeds have flowered sooner than expected. $2 million worth of flowers for this project. Luigi wants to know where the money is coming from. Aldo says it's from the restauranteurs' association, of course!

Fern says he doesn't trust this Andreú ("accent on the U," he asides to Omar). Where is he getting this $2 million?

Aldo asks, do you distrust him because you don't know him? Or because he's my friend?

Fern defensively gives some explanation that I don't totally get (and suspect is nonsense) about how knowing someone is the same as being their friend, or somesuch. Like Omar, for example. Aldo says it's good for each of us to get to know every person we can meet in our lives. Since they're face-to-face, why not do that now? Fern says why bother, it's only temporary. Aldo says that doesn't matter. He thinks they should talk a bit about who they are and share their Deep Thoughts. Fern says he's already said what he thinks. Aldo says (directing this comment at Luigi and Omar, who are listening with interest) that it'd be better if they could speak private.

Fern asks why he wants to do it in private. Aldo says it's so they can speak calmly, get to know each other, and so Aldo can get Fern's support, since he has so very much experience...

Fern smiles, flattered. Luigi and Omar look a little worried by this seemingly successful appeal to Fern's vanity.

"...as an ex," Aldo finishes. The smile quickly disappears from Fern's face. "As ex-president of Conceptos," Aldo adds. (Luigi and Omar exchange puzzled looks.) Fern lets out a sigh of relief and agrees to the chat. He tells Omar and Luigi ("muchachos y muchachas") to leave them alone. Luigi says he can't leave Aldo alone with Fern - he doesn't know what a savage he is. Aldo says that's exactly why he needs to get to know him. Luigi tells him to scream for help if he ever feels that he's in danger. He and Omar leave Fern and Aldo alone in the office. Aldo stares Fern down with a confident smile as Fern fidgets uncomfortably.

Fern tells Aldo his life's story, or at least the part that would appear on a resume, about his schooling in communications, publicity, marketing, and cinematography in Barcelona, after which he came to this company and began his professional life. Aldo flatters him and says it's very impressive, but he isn't satisfied. Those aren't the Deep Thoughts he was looking for. Fern says caray, go ahead and ask him something - whatever he wants. Aldo wants to know why Fern distrusts him and his friend Guillermo. "Do you think we're liars? That we're traitors? That we use people for our personal convenience?" Fern's mouth hangs open, then he glibly denies this. He paces nervously and sits behind Aldo's desk (he's not used to sitting on the other side of a desk yet). He says he just thinks it's suspicious that they were able to come up with $2 million practically overnight. Caray, that's a lot of money!

Aldo says there's a great saying that when people are hungry, they think about bread. In other words, maybe Fern is suspicious because he's thinking about fraud himself. Fern chokes self-consciously and mutters "Carvajal." He says no, but he's not so naive as to be easily fooled or surprised.

Aldo then calmly changes the subject. He asks what is the most important thing to him? "What kind of question is that?," Fern asks. "One that hasn't been answered," Aldo responds. Fern says he has an answer, but wants to hear Aldo's answer first, since there are so many questions on his side. "Love," Aldo replies simply. "For me too," Fern says. "Love is the most important thing." "Really?" Aldo asks. He's still smiling, but he looks skeptical.

"Do you doubt me?" Fern asks. "Yes," Aldo replies. "Well, you're wrong," Fern says sincerely. It wasn't before, but it is now. Love is first, it's the most important thing, but the problem is, his love is not being returned.

Aldo says he believes Fern now and he knows he's in front of a decent human being. "Thanks, but, we still don't know each other so well yet," Fern says. Aldo says it's a great start and suggests they get back to work.

Back in the exec lobby

The cuartel and Yazmin wait for Lety to finish talking with Lola. PM worries that it's taking a long time. Martha says she's lost her appetite, because she's sure that desk next to hers is going to be the airhead's. Sara wonders who will become the new receptionist. Juana hopes it will be someone new.

Lopez comes by and asks about the big boxes on the floor. Martha says they're Omar's things, he wants to have them stored someplace but they can't (for some reason) keep them in the warehouse. Martha asks Lopez where he thinks they should go. He doesn't want to make a decision but tells Martha he doesn't want to see them there any more.

Yazmin greets Lopez. "At your service, baby," he answers. Yazmin asks for Lety. Lopez promises that Lety will see her immediately. Just then, Lola comes out of Lety's office and sends Yazmin in for Lety. Lola gently pushes Lopez aside. Yazmin greets her courteously and Lola tells her that Lety needs to talk to her. Yazmin excuses herself to Lopez and caresses his cheek. (Ew!) After she leaves, Lola laughingly tells the cuartel they don't know what's in store for that homewrecker.

Lopez tells Martha to call Saimon and have him pack up Fern's things, and to call the IT guy and have him move Fern's old computer and set up Lety's new computer. (I guess they have to talk about something.)

Tomas comes in clutching his stomach. He starts to explain himself to Lopez, but Lopez walks away while he's in the middle of a sentence. Tomas tells Lola he's feeling awful. Lola asks if she should call a doctor. He says no, call a restaurant. He needs a transfusion of tacos, quesadillas, etc. and a liter of juice. He tells Lola he's going to need that every day. He staggers back to his office. "It never ends, it never ends," Lola frets. Martha says he eats more than her, and wonders how he can still be so skinny.

In Lety's office, Yazmin congratulates Lety on her new job. Lety tells Yazmin she's hired, and she'll be paid what she's owed. Yazmin says she deserves it, and Luigi needs her. Lety says she won't be working for Luigi - she'll be working in reception. Yazmin is impactada. She blames Lola. Lety says nobody tells her what to do, she's the president and she makes the decisions. She says that just now, she was telling that to Lola. (Actually, what she said to Lola was "if you can't stand to have Yazmin around, I'll try to find another way to work things out with Luigi." Hmmm.)

Yazmin whines that it isn't fair. She's a model and dancer, but instead of helping her reach the stage, they cut her down. Lety says Yazmin doesn't have to take the job - surely there are many others who would want it. Yazmin wipes away the tears, smiles, and says okay, she'll take the job. Lety says she's glad and says "please don't cry at me." She asks if Yazmin is only taking the job to annoy Lola. Yazmin says no, she's never done anything to Lola. Lety warns her not to cause problems. Yazmin claims to be quite the pacifist, and says it's just that Lola won't forgive her because her Flaquito prefers her. Yazmin adds that it's very unfair.

"What's unfair is that you call him 'flaquito' (skinny)," Lety says. Yazmin says that Lety can't imagine all that she's suffered in her life. Lety decides to end this dumb conversation and advises Yazmin to leave Lola alone.

Saimon comes in speaking Greek, or perhaps pseudo-Greek, along with the IT guy. Saimon is glad to see Yazmin. The two of them flirt, and Saimon tells her that he's single. Yazmin says they're going to be seeing more of each other because she'll be working in reception. "Really?" Saimon says in English. Lety yells at Yazmin and glares at her.

Outside, the cuartel are processing the news that Lola has just given them. PM is upset that Yazmin is taking her old job. Yazmin comes out, and PM warns her to stay away from Saimon. Yazmin says Saimon told her he's single.

Now just the boys again

The Marx Brothers reunite. Aldo says they should go to the restauranteurs' association so they can meet Guillermo Andreú. Fern thinks they should meet at Conceptos instead. Omar reminds Fern that this project is Guillermo's idea and he's putting up the money. Fern scolds Omar. Doesn't he understand anything? Of course they'll be meeting with GA at the restauranteurs' association, Fern says.

Lopez interrupts to tell Fern that Lety wants him to get his stuff out of her office. Fern says he already knows that he has to move his stuff out and he's in a meeting. Lopez excuses himself and leaves.

Omar wants them to meet with Guillermo. Aldo says he will arrange it, but there's something else they need to consider. Fern disagrees. Aldo asks what Fern's disagreeing with. Omar tells Fern that Aldo hasn't said anything yet. Fern tells Omar he knows that, and would Omar please not interrupt. Aldo asks what's the point. (Apparently, it's a rhetorical question.) He says their objective is to promote gastronomical tourism for Mexico, so they need to explore the different ways to promote it overseas. Fern suggests going to the bank of international business. (I'm not sure exactly what that is, but I get the impression that it's like if you were talking about getting some footwear and then some genius said "I know - let's go to the shoe store!")

Abbot & Costello (Fern and Omar) talk in the hallway outside Aldo's office. "I don't like him," Fern complains. "As much as I want to like him, I can't. He rubs me the wrong way." Omar asks if that's why Fern was saying such goofy, contrary things in front of Aldo and being naughty. Fern says he was being impressive and eloquent. Omar misunderstands and asks, "who did he tell?" (Elocuente sounds like el lo cuente.)

Omar says it sounded like he was jealous. He wants to know what Fern and Aldo talked about when they were alone. Fern says the project, of course. Fern admits Aldo is smart and says they need to be careful around him. Omar says "so you mean he's a good rival for you." Ha! They leave, and Yazmin appears in the hallway outside Aldo's office, looking for Luigi.

In Lety's office

Lety is looking at a photo of Marcia and drawing a cartoonish picture of a very angry-looking woman. Saimon annoys Lety as he packs Fern's things. The IT guy is disassembling Fern's wicked cool Mac and asking Saimon about the breakup with PM. Saimon very wordily confirms that they've split up and tells the IT guy not to be so sad. Lety gets Saimon's attention and he and the IT guy explain why they are there. "Thanks, you can have it, it's all yours," Lety says.

Lety has added the label "Marcia" over her cartoon. (Great, that's just what we need, more ugliness on paper for people to find and get angry about.) Saimon packs the golden lion award from Cannes into the box. She gives him the photo to pack away as well. He complains about the room seeming too vacant and her walls being too plain. He's distracted and packs her purse (with the diary in it).

The IT guy asks Saimon for more details about the breakup with PM, but Saimon doesn't want to talk about it. He changes the subject and says the movie Titanic made him cry. The IT guy says it was very sad. Lety says she cried too. (She takes her purse back.) Saimon says he felt the same way when he found out that Fern and Marcia had split up. (Lety rolls her eyes slightly.) The IT guy says he was happy when they got back together.

This reminds Lety of something. She gives Saimon the bag of Fern's gifts, etc. She tells Saimon it's pure trash and Fern can do whatever he wants with it. Saimon keeps calling her "Licenciada" and she tells him she's still "Lety." He doesn't want to call her that, he's just a lowly messenger and he's grateful that she's let him keep his job.

Zoological oddities

Luigi and Aldo talk. I finally get a good look at Aldo's shirt - yes, it looks like it's been tie-dyed... poorly. Aldo talks about Fern's character. He seems like a decent guy. He may be treacherous at times, but he has something special. "Something special? Special how? Like me?" Luigi asks. Aldo ignores the question and continues with his Deep Thoughts. Even though Fern's wrong, he repents; he's a noble man, and very likeable. (I'm not sure how much of this I got right.)

Luigi says Aldo is like his grandmother; he sees everyone's good side, even the devil's. Aldo says Fern isn't the devil - he's human, with a bright side and a dark or hidden side. Luigi says whatever, he just hopes Fern leaves them alone to work in peace.

Just then, Yazmin bursts in, like a one-woman Lenny and Squiggy. She apologizes to Aldo, but Luigi yells "knock-knock" at her impatiently and doesn't introduce her. She tells Luigi they wouldn't hire her as his model. Luigi wants to know who "they" is. He guesses it's "the platypus," but is met with a reproachful look from Aldo. "Oh, all right," Luigi says. Outraged, he leaves to yell at Lety. Yazmin wiggles her fingers goodbye at Aldo.

Aldo tells himself it's a zoo. He goes to the lobby to look for Lety. Alicia is morosely packing up her things at her desk. Aldo asks her if she's feeling well. She says she's okay, but Sara explains the situation. Alibubi pretends to be friendly to the cuartel and denies that she's upset.

Abbot and Costello go to their office. Omar says that of everyone they've dealt with today, Lety was the one who impressed him the most. He thinks she's making a strong start.

The two of them are standing in front of the door. Omar looks at the desk and the nice comfy chair behind it. Fern awkwardly repeats what Omar just said, and they both try to hide goofy grins. (My guess: either Omar accidentally said Fern's line, or said it too early, or else they're both laughing in anticipation of what they're about to do.) They both dash toward the desk; Omar runs around it but Fern hurls himself over it! (I'm pretty sure that's not a Miró on the wall after all.) Fern seems to hurt himself, but he wins the big chair. He tells Omar he knows it's his office, but he's pulling rank, ex-rank, and thinks he should get to sit there. "And break your snout too, huh?" Omar says.

Fern says again that Lety is off to a strong start. It's a good idea and he will support it. Omar starts to say something about Marcia, when Marcia pops in and says "Hello." (So now we have TWO one-woman Lenny and Squiggy acts.) Fern and Omar stand up and Fern says they're about to go to the bank of international business. (This is a brilliant strategy on Fern's part. All he has to do is keep making excuses to get away from Marcia, and eventually she'll forget they ever had a relationship, right?) Omar begins to explain that Aldo suggested -

"It was my idea," Fern interrupts. He says it was his suggestion, basically his, to become acquainted with the different ways of promoting tourism to Mexico. (Hmm... doesn't Mexico already have a tourism commission?) Saimon comes in with Fern's stuff. Marcia sees the trash bag and demands to know what that's doing there. Saimon gives a long-winded explanation that boils down to, "Lety told me to move Fern's things and she said he'd know what to do with the bag." Marcia says she knows what's in the bag, but she doesn't know why he's still keeping it like it's a treasure. (A treasure? Do you keep your treasures in a trash bag?) Omar looks uncomfortable. Fern says what treasure? If she is referring to the bag she left in his office, then she's the one who left it there.

Pointing, she complains about his rumpled appearance. I don't see anything, but he brushes something off of his jacket and explains that he was marking his territory - it's a macho thing. He tells Saimon to throw the bag in the trash. Saimon asks for a trashcan. The IT guy, who's been pretty much doing nothing, helpfully finds the very small wastebasket under the desk. Saimon tries to stuff the bag into it and then Fern puts the wastebasket under his desk. He asks if she's satisfied. She says no, she's been thinking about it and she can't accept that Lety is getting to have the last word on this project. Marcia thinks they should all have to agree.

Meanwhile, Luigi and Yazmin complain to Lety. They argue over whether or not Lety kept her word. Lety said she agreed during the meeting that they need Yazmin at the company, and now here she is, at the company. "Are you making fun of me?" Luigi asks. Lety says no, she's kept her word, she's hired Yazmin back to Conceptos. She reminds Yazmin that she sat right there in front of her and said she'd take the job in reception. Yazmin confirms this reluctantly. "Wait - you agreed to come back under those conditions?" Luigi asks her. Yazmin says yes. He scolds her for wasting his valuable time and stomps out. Lety accuses Yazmin of trying to go over her head with Luigi. She says the only thing Yazmin accomplished was to show Lety what a cheat she is. Next time she does something like that, she'll be out of a job. Yazmin promises she'll behave herself, thanks Lety, and leaves. Lety tells herself she doesn't believe it.

The IT guy begins unpacking Fern's computer (actually, he's only opening the box) and listens to Fern and Marcia argue about the project. She thinks it's too ambitious. Fern tells her about the $2 million investment. This impresses the IT guy as well as Marcia. Fern says he thinks the project isn't really what's bothering her. She expresses annoyance that Lety has so many fans. Fern reminds her that they need this opportunity to pay their debts, and they all will have to work at it. Marcia sarcastically asks who is she to question these things.

Fern says they (he and Omar) are going to eat and then they're going to the bank of international business. He asks the IT guy if it's going to take him all morning to set up his computer. He and Omar leave for lunch. Marcia takes another look at the trash bag, slaps her photo at Saimon and leaves in disgust.

The IT guy says "don't tell me they're fighting again." Saimon comforts the IT guy like a little boy.

Fern and Omar see Alicia, Aldo, and Luigi talking in the lobby. Fern complains that Aldo is always, always looking for Lety. He and Omar leave for lunch. Luigi whines about the feas and invites Aldo to lunch. Alicia thinks this is a great idea and invites herself. Aldo begs off and Luigi stomps off in a huff. Alibubi starts flirting with Aldo, touching his shoulder and asking him to console her. The cuartel praises Aldo for his patience. Alicia sweetly thanks them for being such good friends and tells them she's having a conversation with Aldo. He says he's moved by the way Alicia suffers for her work. (She doesn't realize he's making fun of her.) They praise him some more as he goes to see Lety.

Alicia tells the cuartel she could see how much Aldo wanted her. They make fun of her some more and point out that he left her to see Lety. Martha says that he has good taste. (Alicia thinks Martha's referring to her, of course, not Lety.) Alicia says she likes everything about him, and she's sure he likes everything about her too. She also says something about the bus that I don't get.

Lety is glad to see Aldo and says she's working on the project. He asks if that's the only reason she's glad to see him - to talk about work? She says no, but she's nervous about "all of this." He gives her the good news about the $2 million.

---

Next week
Tomas dances, meets Yazmin, and gets slapped by Alicia, in some order.
Also, if I heard correctly, it's going to be a two-hour episode on Monday, starting at the usual time. Check your local listings to be sure. I don't know if this means there won't be a Mundo that night.

Vocabulary words:
chusma = rabble; common folk
semilla = seed
nido=nest

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