Caray, Caray!

Ivonne gets her nasty friend Erika to fake CL's lab results so that the doctor ends up telling CL he has prostate cancer. CL is convinced there must be some mistake. (If he only knew!!) The doctor tells CL his cancer is so advanced the only option is to operate immediately, otherwise it's only a matter of time.

Erika calls Ivonne to tell her CL is getting the bad news at this very moment, ha ha. Nasty Erika reveals she swapped out somebody's old lab result in place of CL's. Folks we can all breathe a sigh of relief that some poor innocent guy is not involved in this diabolical plot. Whew!!

Erika suddenly decides she's worried about her job. Duh! Ivonne advises her to blame it on human error. Oh, that's OK then, being life-or-death incompetent is so much better than just being mean and stupid. Ivonne is happy to hear the doctor is knife-happy. She figures a few days of suffering is the very least that CL deserves.

CL wants a second opinion and the doctor encourages him to get it. Quickly. Every minute he waits puts him closer to the tomb. Then the doctor gives CL the final blow. Sometimes as a result of surgery the nerves are damaged. CL might not be able to resume a normal sex life.

In the privacy of their bedroom Nidia confronts Delirio about what Yadi said. She accuses him of exaggerating their feelings for each other. He pleads his case, did they or did they not just have a night of passion? (Ick.) Nidia waffles. Delirio says they are like Antonio and Cleopatra. She rolls her eyes.

CL finds Paula in the waiting room. Stunned, he tells her he has a grave (no pun intended, he really said it) problem and he'll tell her about it at home.

Nidia tells Delirio that last night was a revolting manipulation on his part. He's a degenerate! She throws pillows at him as he yelps out the names of the world's great lovers.

Angarita is leaving Achichipico against Juan's protests. Juan NEEDS Anga, what will he do without him? Anga assures Juan they will remain partners but he has to leave town. Juan gives him a big hug.

Delfina finds out from the hotel dude that Anga checked out and headed for the bus station. She dashes out to stop him.

Anga gives Juan a check, a big one judging by the look on Juan's face. It's his first contribution to the business. Anga says he views Juan like a son and they hug once more. Juan looks so very sad, poor guy.

Yadi, in the interest of helping along Ma's memory, tells Nidia that she (Nidia) had lovers before, during and after marriage. Nidia tries to look aghast, she says she's a decent woman. "But with a roving eye," adds Yadi. Nidia is very disappointed to hear that Juan, the chomi chomi in the photo, was NOT one of her conquests.

Fer is also getting on the bus to leave Achichipico. He advises Juan that for better or for worse he should probably give Paula a call. Juan bids farewell to his pals as the bus pulls out of town. Poor Delfina runs up but she's too late, she's missed the bus.

CL pouts on his bed until Paula forces him to reveal his diagnosis. An eavesdropping Consuelo gasps and prays when he tells Paula he has cancer. The doctor is optimistic about an operation, but CL might end up with DDDS. (Droopy Ding-Dong Syndrome as coined by Julie in her Pasion recap.)

CL gets all self-pitying, as if getting a boner (pardon my bluntness) is the single most important aspect of lovemaking. Boo hoo, he'll be an incomplete man and he doesn't want Paula's pity.

Since CL is not in the office Delirio approaches Pastor about his Very Important Sofwhere Presentation. He blathers on until Pastor finally calls Monica for permission.

Moni is still annoyed at Pastor for committing industrial espionage (she thinks), so she snippily tells him that if CL gave the project to Delirio then Pastor should go forward and quit bothering her with these stupidities! She hangs up on him but Pastor pretends she respectfully gives him authorization to do whatever.

Gutis, slobbering on his cigar, and Manzano, he of the greasy comb-over, ogle Marely while Delirio is in Pastor's office. Delirio comes out and says convincing Pastor to buy the S/W will be a piece of cake. Delirio is very insulting and calls Pastor an idiot, a wig-wearer, no different from the songs of the ugly sex. (Los cantos del sexo feo...que the hell?) Anyway, I'm sure it's a derogatory term for homosexual, as if that should make a difference in Pastor's ability to make decisions. Pastor is a putz no matter what his sexual persuasion.

Juan tells Susana that he's going to Juanito's school. She says she'd love to go. Juan says why not, Juanito loves beautiful women and he does too.

Consuelo the ratfink calls Moni to give her the bad news that CL has cancer. Moni is impactada.

Paula goes home and tells Ana she's packing her bags because she has to be at her husband's side. Ana comments that a woman going home to her man should at least have a happy face. This is Pau's cue to tell her ma that CL has cancer. One more impactada.

Manzano, flanked by Delirio and Gutis, gives his presentation to Pastor. He keeps winking, thinking he can flirt his S/W into the company. Pastor asks Manzano if he has something in his eye. Pastor asks the usual questions, how much does the product cost, is it guaranteed? Manzano suggests that if Pastor has his doubts he'd be glad to give him a private demo, wink wink.

The three S/W pirates march out of the office single file toward the elevator as Mari gawks. Once inside they congratulate themselves on their victory. Sofwhere whore reigns supreme!

CL shows up at the office and Ivonne snarkily asks him how his exam went. "Oh fine," he lies.

Moni follows him into his office and says he looks a little down. What did the doc say? She tries to get the truth out of CL but he refuses to tell her.

Juan and Susana hang out at Juanito's school. She takes his hand and Juan thought-bubbles that they were on dangerous territory, on the precipice, on the machete's edge. At that moment Juanito showed up and uttered the gem-cutting sentence, "Hey dad, is she going to be my new mom?"

Juan composes himself during the commercial. He thought bubbles that he's putting on 11 shirts but he doesn't want to close the door on this fine lady. Susana winks and tells Juanito that she and Juan are only friends. Juan thought-bubbles that she saved him - 2 points for Susana! Juan asks would Juanito like it if Juan were in love with her? Juanito answers that she's very beautiful. Juan thinks that Susana would be good not only for him but also for Juanito. Dang! That is like the kiss of death to true love.

Tweedle Dumb comes into Juan's office with a big bag of fertilizer that he throws down next to Herlinda's desk. He pisses and moans about having to work for Juan. Tweedle gets all sweaty and red-face and rants that Juan is with his 'girlfriend' Susana. This pushes Herlinda's buttons and she says they're only partners. "Partners in many things," he blusters to his unhappy sister.

Susana advises Juanito to take something unique to his teacher, something other than an apple, something that will make him stand out. Juanito suggests a mango, because daddy says that the ladies will always throw themselves at a good mangazo. (Which is, I think, slang for a sexy guy.) He says that must be some kind of mango, of which there are many. Susana is highly amused and showers Juanito with kisses. Juan is embarrassed at being busted but proud of his son as always. (Hey! Men ARE mangoes!)

Moni calls Paula; she wants to meet and talk personally. Paula doesn't want to but Moni cries until Paula agrees to meet her in 1/2 hour.

Back in Achichipico Delfina soaks her feet after running through town in her high heels trying to stop the bus. Juanito listens to her tale of woe that she lost the love of her life. Juanito asks what about Don Aldemar?

Speaking of the king of Rome, he is outside giving directions to a 6-piece Mariachi band. They begin. They are awful, but Juanito is delighted. Hey, he says, it's Don Aldemar! Don A wails his song of love to an excited Delfina, she hasn't lost love after all! She and Juanito high-five. Delfi cries and we're not sure if it's due to his awful singing or his sweet sentiment. But wait a minute...his isn't a song of love, it's a song of insult, a bad joke. He sings that he's going to forget her. He's publicly dumping her! Delfina can't believe the shame.

Don A announces he is hereby retracting his petition of love. He calls Delfina a traitor, he's leaving and he's going to forget her. Forever. Delfi cries on Juanito's shoulder.

At the cafe Moni tells Paula she could tell by CL's face that something is wrong. She passionately begs Paula to tell her the truth. "Paula look me in the eyes and tell me he's OK," she begs. Pau says she can't...CL has prostate cancer. Moni looks impactada for the second time, the big faker.

Juanito asks Delfi if she loved both guys. She explains that a woman caught in the frontier between youth and maturity, a woman such as herself, can't always control her passions. It's a common romantic story, two men, equally handsome (que?), fighting for the love of a lady. "Like in the telenovelas!" yells Juanito, concluding that it's all very complicated.

Paula explains to Moni that CL's cancer is so advanced that an operation is the only choice. "And afterward, then what?" probes Monica, "He's going to lose the possibility of a sexual life?" Moni - 1, Paula - 0. Paula is offended and tries to leave but Moni pulls her back. Paula finally tells her she has to go because she has already moved back in with CL. Paula - 2, Moni - 1. Moni promises that she won't say anything to CL about their conversation. "Then there's nothing else to say," snips Paula as she leaves.

"Oh yes there's more," seethes Monica at nobody in particular, "I should be with him right now." She calls Paula an estupida.

Ana and Laura work together in strained silence. Ana's phone rings. Laura perks up her ears when she hears it's Juan. He tells Ana things are going well with his new business and how is Paula? Is she around? He heard she was looking for him. Ana tries to talk quietly while Laura practically breaks her neck trying to hear. Ana hems and haws until Juan guesses the truth. Did Paula return to CL? When Ana confirms it he looks disappointed, slightly pissed, and absolutely not surprised.

Heriberto surprises Susana in her hotel room. He tells her he's a man of many surprises. He pokes his gut out, posturing and flirting, blech. Susana says she has a headache and was just going out to get some medicine. She pushes him out the door and says she'll see him some other time.

Ana hopefully tells Juan that Paula spends her mornings at her house and she encourages him to try calling tomorrow. He tells Ana it was great to speak to her. "Adios," he sadly says after hanging up the phone.

Juan is at his favorite spot down by the river. He imagines he sees Paula in her bikini. She blows him a kiss. They swim together. They embrace in the water and they kiss...and any similarity to life is purely coincidental.

se azotan por un buen mangazo = they'll throw themselves at a sexy guy (I think, help anyone??)

ojo alegre = roving eye (Lit. happy eye)

Tomorrow: Laura tells Monica that Juan called Ana. Ana tells Paula that Juan called.

Labels: Juan