Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Guapos 02-12-08 "So Many Detours on the Road to Rome"

First a big shout out to Cathy for her excellent and detailed recap of last night, I missed all but the last five minutes. I missed last Friday night as well, futilely trying to score a permanent job move where I work.

So enough about me let’s get ready to see why people who are not futilely working for an unachievable goal, people who live in mansions & don’t worry about health care or the price of gas. Well looks like they aren’t any happier than I am.

So Red has moved into the family hacienda? Everyone who I ever knew that let his or her son’s girlfriend move in to the family estate was usually going by the term Grandma or PaPa, by the next year. Maybe cause it was a double wide and not a mansion.

Luci grills Andrea, worried that Const has lured Red into his lair. Red says, no it is just to get closer to Al & win his heart back. Meanwhile, Val has come bouncing into Al’s room to tell him that Red has moved in and isn’t it great? Al thinks not and in a bad humor sends Val on her way.

Next day….

Gloves, the awesome secret keeper family butler, is in Hugo’s room.
See I don’t get why he treats Hugo like he is an invalid, Gloves is in on the secret that as far as we can tell everything south of Hugo’s belt seems to be working just fine. Really Gloves has something on each and everyone of these AssHat’s. I hope someday he gets to use the info. I think Gloves fills Hugo in on the fact that Red has slithered into the house. This does not bode well for the happiness of Al & Mili.
Hugo wanting to be alone mulls over this news.

Al, Luci, Damien and the ever-evil Const are having a meeting. Luci is going on a trip, (this is polite talk for going to Italy to hook-up with Eugenio). In her absence she is giving Al her twenty percent, meaning Al now has as much company sway as Const. Const recent winner of the much coveted, “Father of the Year” award; reminds of why he is such a stellar father by calling Al an idiot and trying to badger Luci into reneging on her decision. Sorry Const, she isn’t reneging.

Back at the Hacienda, Mili visits Granny. Granny is suffering from her shattered dreams, Granny believes Rosario & said grandchild are dead. We, the viewing public of course know better. Mili tries to cheer Grams up to no avail. All is not lost. Young Mili offers to let Grams adopt her. She can pretend that Mili is her missing sight unseen, but much beloved grandchild. This perks Granny right up. What a generous thought. Seriously think about it, twenty million people in Mexico City and Granny’s real granddaughter is offering be Granny’s pretend granddaughter.
----Grams, if you’d like to disinherit Const, well I’d be perfectly happy to step up as daughter, I mean just sayin---

We get to see Mili drinking some water, I guess in reference to her drinking the evening before.

Val is sunbathing and Morgan and Horacio are watching. She is listening to her Secret Love CD. Horacio tries to get Morgan to say he is the singer. Finally, Horacio goes up and lets it slip that Morgan is the Secret Lover. Val is all giggly. Soon Bobby approaches and asks if she likes the CD. Val tells him, yes indeed and that Morgan is the singer. Bobby says that isn’t true, but Val just blows him off with a classic rich girl scoff.

Andrea visits Hugo, she spots the painting, the one that didn’t have a face. Well now Mili’s face is on it. Red makes some nasty comments and Hugo stops her. They will help each other so Al & Mili break up and the can both claim their respective prizes.
---Okay I must insert here that Hugo is no longer amusing me, there is something kind of “Norman Bates” about this guy---

Damien, the weasel, is talking to Const. He realizes his value has just gone up. Al has 40% and Const has 40%. Hmmmm, Damien asks Const for some money. Yes, loyalty has price. The conversation rotates to Al in absencia, Damien says your Hijo, which Const snarks out a bastard comment. Damien reminds him of son by marriage. Now I may have missed the fine points, but apparently, Luci was granted a marriage into a classy family, and her father saved Const Pa’s company. Kinda like the British in Iraq, you slap a country together and fifty years later, you find out everybody despises each other and they are going for blood.

We now get a “Classic Television Moment”, a shot of female legs walking across a room and dropping a towel or robe on the floor, the movement of sheets and we see Red closing her eyes, resting her head on sweet Al’s pillow. A knock at the door. She doesn’t answer. Mili opens the door and seeing Red lying there demands to know, “What are you doing here?”
Red answers, “That she was invited to spend the night”. A long hawt night of passion.
---It is a well known ploy of TeleNovelas and real life, that when people regale their romantic encounters, they are lying, the only people who talk about it are the ones who aren’t getting any---
Mili holds her own in this war of words. Red says that Red and Al are an item. Mili counters with no, she and Al are Novios. Red says, “Nope you are a diversion.” Mili answer, “Speak for yourself, you are the one on your back, you are the diversion, Al respects me”. She then shakes like three weeks worth of dust out of her handy feather duster and leaves. Red doesn’t seem too thrilled that Al’s not nailing the help.

Luci has a conversation with Al about her trip. Al understands completely why she wants to fly to Europe and nail Eugenio. Actually it is one of those, you have suffered from being married to my BSC father for all these years and you deserve some happiness. Go with God. Oh yeah and I am going to make nice with Bobby. Luci thinks indeed he should.

Later hanging around the garden, Luci runs into Grammy. Grammy is like, did you think I have done nothing but sit in my room for the past eighteen years. Luci is chagrined like “Well yeah”. Grammy has older generation advice for Luci. She asks if Luci is going to Italy to “hook-up”. Luci says she deserves some happiness, Gawd knows Const sucks it out of every situation, he is the Hoover of Happiness sucking.
Grammy is well aware of her son’s personality quirks and faults Luci not in the least, but get a divorce first, then get some lovin. I just don’t think Luci can wait.

In the servant quarters Karla is lying on the bed crying. It is over and she just wants to die. How sad is that? Anyway, someone fill me in, cause I don’t know what Damien did other than his normal odious behavior. Her mother is trying to make her feel better and Mili comes in climbing on her own bed crying. Karla’s ma now lament and poor Lina the other servant who isn’t crying is forced to question if perhaps the Convent has any openings.

Bobby tells Val that he is good friends with the guy at the Radio Station. This is like the fifth time I have heard this conversation and I miss a lot of episodes, anyway, the Secret Lover will be singing at five so she should see if Morgan is there at that time. We get a snotty “Whatever” combo eyeroll from Val.

Damien and Const are still discussing at the office. Red comes in and tells them, I don’t know his name is there to see them, it is the wheeler dealer guy, from earlier in the show. I think they already lost money to this guy. He comes in and tells them first about some guy that went to jail. White collar crime I suppose. Then he has some fantastic proposition for Dumb and Dumber. Only thing is, that Const must present a perfect family image in order to capture this fine contract worth millions.
---What contract can this be? In an effort to cut cost is “Family First” shipping it pamphlet contract south of the border?---
Well, that doesn’t bode well for the “Luci trip, the servant romance, the ex-Amante now nailing the son.
How will Const handle these problems?

Mili goes to visit Hugo of the Sturdy Legs. She laments her heartbreak over Al. Hugo says Al was just playing her, unlike Hugo. Mili felt so important and pretty on their date last night. Hugo says he loves Mili even in her lil gangsta clothes. He is telling her how he loves her for her and would never try to change her. He is in a creepy way getting closer and closer, he looks like he is going to swoop in for a kiss, but Mili pulls back and leaves. Hugo is thwarted again. Mili always take a bath never a shower. This guy is creepy.

Mili visits Granny. Granny is reading a book of poetry. She says she wants to introduce Mili to the author. Mili thinks she is referring to a TeleNovela star and Granny says no, it is a poet. Mili questions if he is coming to visit. No Granny says he has been dead these many years.
---Then we are forced to endure an embarrassing, “Ellie Mae Clampett” conversation. How could she meet the guy if he is dead, Mili then says she does not want to be introduced to a ghost---Yes folks it was that painful, what kind of education did she receive at that school? I mean I know the Holy Orders have suffered fewer recruits in the past few years, but is it like the Armed Services? I mean have the standards fallen that low?

Grammy starts lamenting some scripted despair, which is actually poetry. Mili leaves and Gloves comes in clapping. He mentions explaining that passage to Rosario. This sends Grams into another road not taken, decline. She tells Gloves that wonderful Mili has offered to play Grandkid, to her, bringing a smile to Grannies lips. Gloves is also pleased.

At some point Bobby and Al, make up. Al tells Bobby that his Ma is off on a trip, Bobby says probably to see my Dad. Both decide that their family units suck and maybe they will end up brothers. Bobby is moving to a Hotel and Al offers to help with the rent. I guess Bobby doesn’t have a job. If his Dad was worth anything he would have gone National, like Dr. Phil, then Bobby could have cranked out teen help books after a couple of semesters at junior college. Life is so unfair.

Val spies Morgan rubbing on the car, (with a cloth, not with himself). She teases him about the CD & he does some lame ass scoobie doobie doo nonsense and says that indeed he is an excellent singer. Val tells him to she wants to go somewhere. Once they are in the car, she tells him to turn on her favorite radio station. There it is, the singing lover. How can you be there when you are here. Awwww the Naco hilarity insues.

Damien and Const arrive at home and want some coffee in the study. Const makes a big pretense of asking Al what he see when he looks at Const. Al just blows him off.

Mili brings the coffee to the study, pausing first to eavesdrop, like good servants everywhere, she hears Const say (and I may have this wrong), that Ma is dead.
Mili is horrified. She brings the coffee in and hangs around til Damien realizing his drink isn’t coming leaves.

Val arrives at the Radio Station, she goes one way, Morgan opens a door and sees Bobby. Val walks in to the announcer booth, explains who she is. The announcer stokes her fragile ego with cries that she is famous. She wants to see the Secret Lover, Bobby ducks down and she sees Morgan. Like her father she screams ‘Me Encanta’. Morgan isn’t about to say it isn’t him.

Luci is on the phone talking with Eugenio, we only see a one sided conversation, which leads me to believe we may never see Eugenio again and the actor has gone on to more fertile TeleNovela grounds. She is planning to go when Damien comes in and she hangs up the phone. He tells her she can’t go now.

Down in the study, Mili tells Const, that she has millions of street buds and they can find Granny’s missing grandkid. She does the “Do you want your kid to hate you for abandoning him/her?”

Stay tuned for more highclass hijnks…
Looks like the good Padre is dropping in…
Meanwhile, Al overhears the story of the missing Grandkid and like all good Television families, Val and Al bring up the missing Hermano at dinner.

Labels:


Comments:
wait- i thought al overheard that he was not the son of Constancio? so i guess i'm wrong then?(man i suck at spanish)
hey keep up the good work! i simply LOVE these recaps. muchas gracias
 

The man who visits Constancio in his office offers him a shot at becoming a Deputy in Parliament, if he has an unblemished family record, etc. It is not a business deal, per se.
 

Sorry I was probably confused since as far as I know Mexico does not have a parliament.
 

I loved the image of Constancio as the Hoover of sucking up happiness. No one else can write a recap quite like you Beckster. Good luck on your job change...whatever it is, you deserve it and should get it!
 

Beckster: Thank you.

Memo to Mili: Pick a daisy, pull a petal and say - "He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, etc."

From lower Ala
 

Thanks for the recaps. : )

Lol my spanish es muy poco, : ) but i thought Mili overheard Constancio saying that he lied to his mum about Rosario and granchild's death, thus prompting Mili's speech of how Constancio needs to find his child.
; )
 

Love your recaps, Beckster!! They crack me up, as always!!

Hopefully, the truth will come out soon. And Granny will be happy! And then Al will be confused......
 

Beckster, thanks for the amusing recap, as always. Karla is crying because Damien wanted her to get an abortion. He fooled her into thinking they were getting married and going to dinner, but then he dumped her at an abortion clinic.

I think we still don't know if she was really pregnant, or if she actually had an abortion. Has anyone else figured it out?
 

She wasn't really pregnant. She overheard someone in the kitchen (can't remember who) talking about a servant who "married up" as a result of a pregnancy and immediately decided to try that out on Damien.
It didn't work but at least it revealed his true character to her. Now will Karla be smart enough to learn from this?
 

Thanks, JudyB. Damien and Karla really deserve each other!
 

bxvobxNo he isn't Connie's son as Connie told Luci he was the son of her french sin.

Connie has been offered a shot in politics, obviously so sleazy visitor and creepy Damian can make some bucks. He has to be the perfect family man which should be fun with an adulterous lush for a wife, a bastard son, a blackmailing BIL, a handful of amantes, an underwear model daughter oh and yes, the missing child of his great love. Sounds like French politics to me not necessarily Mexican LOL

Hugo has morphed into a rat-bastard before our eyes and in true novela fashion doesn't get that Mili wants nothing romantic to do with him. He is just another one of her sounding boards.

Poor Al of the golden lock is going to get blind-sided by Papa's castoff amante and the news of another and destined to be much loved hermanita.

Snotty Spice is in for the shock of her life which i can't wait to see. With luck we'll get a severe eye rolling fit of hysterics about "the Servant".

I though Mr. Gloves and Connie were unnaturally cruel to pee on Regina's dreams and loved Mili calling him on it when she said what happens when you will someone's reason for living. I also loved her ranting at Connie about having a father who abandoned her and how much she hates him. If grouchy Connie wants to have this unknown child of his great love to love him he is going to have one long hard road to hoe. Can't wait to see it.
 

Oops I forgot we have been calling Val Snobby Spice but Snotty Spice works just as well.

Someone pointed out the other day that for a convent raised girl Mili has appalling manners. After yesterday's farce about Gabriel Garcia Lorca she is also horrible uneducated none of which would ring true. Ah but than it is Novelaland and if she were polite and educated we wouldn't have much of a story.
 

I have a man friend who was raised in an orphanage by nuns in Hungary around the time of WWII. He has wonderful courtly manners and says he has the nuns to thank for them.

- Maggie
 

Beckster - just a late quick thanks for your wonderfully entertaining recap!
 

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