Caray, Caray!

Did anyone else think the cut from Damian's strangling to Mili's news was a little too abrupt last night? I mean, I don't feel like we got the full impact of Damian being garroted from behind before switching over. I didn't feel like I could really enjoy Damian's life being in danger properly. Thankfully, we get the rest of that scene. Julio, the guy who lent Damian money, is giving him 24 hours to repay the money or he dies. Show of hands--who believes Julio's serious? Fun times, eh. Julio and the Mystery Woman let Damian off by the side of the road somewhere.

Padre Manuel and Mili have a convoluted conversation about who Mili has or hasn't done what with. Mili tells him nothing's happened with anyone, but she wants him to marry her to someone. PM assumes that she's gone all the way and is expecting. Mili clarifies again that no, no one scored a goal before the game and that she's getting married because she's in luuuuuuurve. This chills PM out, but she never did tell him who she's marrying. That would have likely sent him into shock.

Damian worries about where he'll get the money. Constancio won't help him after the fake-kid drama, he'd rather see Damian dead. He decides he'll disappear for a while and buy himself time. He goes into the living room and sees Luciana, on her way to rehab. Luciana refuses to give him any more money. Constancio and Valeria come in and Luciana announces she's going to rehab--she needs time to think and relax and she doesn't want to hang out with the other rich hags at the spa. Constancio tells her he's going to miss her, but she's not buying that. Neither is Alejandro, who grabs the bag in one hand and Mami in the other to get her out of the house. Constancio finally notices Damian and that Damian's looking a little pale. Exit all.

Enter an older woman looking for Regina. She refuses to tell Braulio who she is or what she's there for. Braulio goes off in a snit.

Constancio comes into Andrea's bedroom to announce that tonight's their night. Andrea's like "cool, cause I want you." Constancio pathetically growls that he wants her more. Etc. Etc. Andrea tries to get a better job out of him, but he says they'll talk about it tonight. The growling and meowing was a little traumatizing for me.

Braulio escorts Regina's visitor into her room. He tries to stick around and spy, but gets dismissed. Regina's visitor says she thinks Braulio is upset at not being given her name. Mystery Woman II is somehow looking after a man who hasn't talked for 10 years and yesterday screamed "no, no, no." Regina thinks she knows the man and says she loves his son. She's been paying for this guy's care for years, apparently. Oh, this would be Alejandro's dad, then. Regina wonders if seeing "the woman he loved" would help, but MWII doesn't know.

Damian invites Karla to come hide out with him at the house in Cuernavaca. Karla is won over by the idea of playing rich for a while. Damian doesn't want her telling anyone where they're going, or that they're going.

Regina and Braulio talk about Luciana going to rehab. Then they spar about sparring with words and about how Regina won't tell Braulio what's going on. He goes off in a snit, which amuses Regina to no end.

Constancio pathetically sprays himself with cologne and possibly gets some in his eyes. Andrea's finally come to visit--she was waiting for Alejandro to leave so he wouldn't catch them. She claims she's still Alejandro's girlfriend. Amid gross smooching, Constancio tells her she's the new head of HR. Andrea goes off to put on something sexy. Constancio tells her to hurry…the Viagra may not last that long.

Karla gets into Damian's car and the two of them head out to Cuernavaca…with a tail, of course, because Damian's too stupid to have thought of that.

Mili brings coffee up to Andrea's room, saying not to worry, there's no poison in it. Andrea asks for a word and Mili tells her to hurry up, she and Lina are watching "The Silver Mask vs. The Vampire Women" and Andrea looks like one of the vampire women. Heh. Andrea says she's lost and she concedes her defeat to Mili. As Mili's leaving the room, Andrea says she hopes Mili can be happy knowing she's leaving a baby without a father. Bee-yotch! Mili doubts it at first. Andrea plays noble, saying she's going away to disappear from their lives and try to be happy with her baby. Oh, and don't tell Alejandro she's having a baby, 'k? And now she's got to rest because there are some problems with the hellspawn and the doctor told her to rest and take lots of sulfur supplements. Once Mili leaves, Andrea wipes the fake tears away and tells the absent Constancio that they've got to get with the baby-making.

Alejandro and Bobby are playing tennis. Alejandro tells Bobby that he's with Mili now and he's going to announce to the family tomorrow that they're getting married. Alejandro advises Bobby to get with the program if he wants to end up with Valeria. Alejandro says Bobby's moving too slow, he needs to step things up with the detalles. Bobby's going to start with flowers tomorrow. The guys joke about "lucky at the game, unlucky in love."

Ewww, grossness. Andrea comes into Constancio's room in her lingerie. She climbs into bed with him as they engage in some really lame wordplay.

Downstairs, Luciana is arriving. Braulio, doing his best Jim Carey in The Mask imitation, enters in his jammies, robe, and avocado face mask. Luciana didn't like rehab so much--no other rich people to hang out with, so she left. Braulio tells her that Constancio's in bed already. He asks if she'd like some food, which she would. He walks off with his dignity and his face mask intact, but starts wiping it off as soon as he gets far enough away.

Socorro is in the kitchen, asking Lina where Karla is--Lina doesn't know. Mili comes in and Socorro asks her as well--she doesn't know either. Braulio comes in and tells Socorro to fix something to eat for Luciana.

Karla and Damian are still on the road. Karla wants to know if there are servants at the house in Cuernavaca, because she needs to abuse them before she can feel better about herself. They're still being tailed…on some small road in the middle of nowhere…oh, no, that's not suspicious at all.

Luciana walks in on Constancio and Andrea. She puts her suitcase in the closet, walks back to the door, says "sorry," turns out the lights, and leaves. I was really expecting fireworks, but this is so much better. Constancio and Andrea are both sitting up in bed with their mouths hanging open wondering qué the hell just happened.

Socorro fixes Braulio a tea for his stomach. It's diuretic and he'll pee 8-10 times a night. Gee, Socorro, you really know how to sell it. Braulio talks about how he started working there 20 years ago, as a chauffer. Then his little sister came to live there because both their parents were dead. He had to be Rosario's father and mother…did this come complete with wardrobe changes? He was destroyed when she left. Socorro asks if he never thought about getting married and having his own family. If it weren't Socorro, that would have sounded like a come-on. He says he was in love once, but then he excuses himself and leaves.

Braulio catches Luciana drinking in the living room. She tells him she's going to lose her husband to Andrea. She can't compete with Andrea's body, her youth, her skankiness. Braulio tells her she's got experience and class, plus she's real purdy. Luciana says she can't compete and Braulio says if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. Ewww, is he suggesting a threesome? Andrea comes downstairs in her robe asking to talk to Luciana. As Mr. 5ft exclaimed, "She's got quite a pair of cojones!" Luciana says rehab was horrible and she's tired and wants to go to bed now. Andrea is dumbfounded. She asks if Luciana said anything to Braulio and he avoids the question.

Mili lies in bed looking at the picture of her mother and crying.

Constancio sits up in bed and asks Luciana if she wants to talk. Luciana says they'll talk tomorrow, she just didn't feel like staying in rehab. She asks him to close the lid on her jar of face cream. After he does, she asks if he's sleepy. Then she jumps him. Yeah, he's just as surprised.

Damian and Karla finally arrive. Karla is needlessly rude to the maid who comes out to get their bags, "Here, be careful with this, don't be clumsy." Then when they get inside and the other maid asks if they'd like something to eat she says, "Of course, something sumptuous, and make it fast, we're starving." Damian tells the maids no one can know they're there. He tells Karla that goes for her too. Karla plops down on the couch with her feet up and calls herself the boss lady.

The next morning, Braulio is summoned by Regina. She wants a taxi. Braulio's still crabby that she won't tell him anything. He mentions that his hair doesn't move because he wears a hairnet at night. Regina thinks he's kidding, but then she's never seen the horror.

Mili's sad-faced and won't tell Lina why. Mili says she's going to the convent today since Regina didn't need her. Mili and Lina have to break the news to Socorro that Karla didn't sleep in her bed last night.

Karla and Damian mack by the pool in Cuernavaca. It's a nice pool. Got a waterfall and everything. Karla is disappointed that Damian dismissed the servants for the day, so now she's got to get him a refill on his drink. Once she gets inside the house, she's attacked by three guys with guns, one of whom is Julio.

Constancio and Andrea are in the office, eating lunch and trying to figure out what is up with Luciana. Andrea's afraid she'll tell Alejandro since she's still trying to get him back. Constancio doesn't think she'll tell since she'd never hurt her baby like that. Andrea's really freaked out about Luciana's behavior. She asks what happened after. Constancio says that Luciana "practically forced" him to have sex.

Regina walks into the Neuropsychiatric Institute. She's startled in the hallway by the woman from yesterday. The woman tells Regina that "he" talked, but more this time. He keeps repeating the name "Constancio." Regina asks to see him. The woman doesn't think it's time yet, but Regina insists on the grounds that she's been paying for his care all these years. She calls the woman "Sra. Directora."

Lina and Mili go to the convent and Lina and Gloria now drag the info out of Mili. She says Alejandro's having a baby. The girls are ecstatic. Lina says the Guapito's going to have a Guapitito (so, Little Pretty Boy's going to have a little Little Pretty Boy.) Mili breaks it to them that she's not the mommy, it's Andrea. Now they're shocked. Lina asks if it's not a trick of Andrea's. Mili says she was going to fight for their luuuuuurve, but she can't fight against a baby. Argh!

Julio shuts off Damian's boom box (yeah, right, like he listens to rap), points a gun in his face, and tells him to get up. It's a nice day to die. He seems pretty serious--I don't know how Damian's going to get out of this one.

The French Patient is in a white padded cell, wearing a white nightgown. Sra. Directora calls him "Francois." He recognizes Regina. He starts yelling "death to Constancio," and has to be sedated.

Tomorrow: All I know is Rorgan intercepts the flowers for Valeria and gives them to Socorro. My DVR shut off after that.

Labels: guapos