Caray, Caray!

Eric tells Bruno that last night Paula had her first driving lesson. Bruno threatens Eric with jail unless he obeys his commands. Eric agrees and wants to know what he has to do. Bruno tells him to find a stuntman on the internet. Eric asks him if something bad will happen to Paula. Bruno reminds him that his a—is his from his brain to his bones. Bruno tells him to be ready at the house at 2:00 p.m. He also said something about going to the airport and that he’ll let Eric know where they are going.

Mary Jo tells Paula about all her problems. Meanwhile Ezekiel arrives and gives them each a cell phone which makes Paula very happy.

At the office, Alex arrives in his Buster Brown outfit, you know, the two-tone grey number with the nipped in at the waist vest, which of course emphasizes his bulging biceps and other beautiful physical attributes. He asks Marie if there are any calls. The most important is about a meeting at 1:00 p.m. with Bruno’s lawyer (Archundo). Alex tells her to call his mother. Fernono arrives and tells Alex that there is no news about Mario Aguirre. Alex tells a shocked Ferno that Mario sent Mary Jo a bouquet of flowers. And, Mary Jo keeps denying that she knows him. He avoids answering whether he believes her or not.

Alex tells Ferno about the 1:00 p.m. meeting and that he has asked Victoria to attend. Ferno doesn’t think that’s such a good idea, but Alex needs her. Ferno says it will put Victoria in a very uncomfortable position. Alex tells him that she’s already in it. The boys talk about the fix their in and the nerve of Bruno having impersonated Alex. Dimwit Fernono says how do you know it’s him. Because, says Alex, he knows me like a book and can fake my signature.

Ferno then tells Alex that he cannot accept the job as vice-president at Lombardo. Ferno has already spoken to Victoria about it and now, in his most constipated way, tells Alex the same thing and that he has nothing more to say.

Alex calls MJ on her cell. It is all love and “mi cielo”. Paula interrupts to put her two centavos in about how grateful she is about receiving the phone. Alex boyishly giggles that there is nothing to thank him for. He tells her about the meeting with the lawyers. She says you must be worried and that she hopes it all goes well. Alex then gives us a “please hug me” look. Cut over to Chucho and Pedro.

After short discussion, Chucho takes on the task of getting Mechita out of jail. Merry mariachi music plays in the background so we know something silly is about to happen. Paula shows Pedro her cell. Pedro wants to know why Mary Jo seems so sad, like are you having problems with Alex. Paula interrupts with her hi-pitched chatter and demands that Mary Jo give them the low down. Mary Jo swears them to complete secrecy and then lets them know that it looks like Bruno and Raquel are Alex’s half-siblings. Pedro is shocked when Mary Jo tells them that they all have the same father and that both Victoria and Antonio were married to other people when Victoria became pregnant with the twins from Hell. Well, says Paula, how dare they talk about us.

Both Pedro and Mary Jo jump all over Paula when she gets her motor mouth running about how could this happen. But, Mary Jo is not finished yet. There is more. Bruno is going to sue Alex to get half the Lombardo fortune.

Bruno thanks a man (papparazo) for a newspaper and some articles that have been published. The man asks for more and Bruno will let him know.

Raquel gives the new driver hell and lays down the law to him about how things have to be done. Nobody around her is allowed to talk. She notices there is no car. She notices a taxi parked in the garage and the driver tells her it will just be for a little while. She checks it out for dust or something. Raquel tells him that he’ll only have to work for her husband when he is drunk and can’t drive. She shouts out orders for him to get going.

Chucho is sitting with Julia who is wearing an orange shirt and is soaking her feet in a pan of water. He tells her about Mechita who is in jail and that she has to help get her out. He tells her the story about getting robbed. She doesn’t believe him at first. Well, he says, have you seen Mechita around here? Finally she gives in and goes with him.

Ulises and Roberto are out for a run on the beach. They talk about the Mary Jo situation and that Bruno is still interested in her and that maybe she had another accomplice, and they say that Bruno is very clever. At this point they are both wearing shirts, but, your editor hopes they will take them off and go for a swim. They toast to Mary Jo and Robo tells Uli that Mary Jo is married and that any man who sends flowers to her is crazy. Yeah! Off come the shirts and they go into the water.

A silver Rolls pulls up to Lombardo properties and Vickie gets out. Marie is on the phone when Mau comes in and just happens to overhear Marie talking on the phone about Mario Aguirre. Mau takes a breath and tells Marie that she’s there to see Alex. Marie tells Mau that Alex is very busy at the moment but, if she’d like to wait, she’s welcome to do so. Anyway, has anybody ever had an ex-novia just drop in at your office for a chat? So, Mau says it would be better if she just called him. She leaves.

Meanwhile, Vickie, Hernan, Ferno and Alex discuss the Bruno situation and that this is his way of getting vengeance. Alex calls him a coward and Hernan tells him that they have to talk things over and come to an agreement before a complaint is filed and the matter becomes public. Vickie for once says that Alex is free to express his opinion. Ferno, who wants to protect Vickie’s image at any cost, says they need to come to an agreement. Hernan agrees with him. Of course, one of the pillars of telenovelaland comes up, a DNA test.

Marie buzzes Alex to tell him the lawyers have arrived. Ferno goes to Vickie and tells her not to get upset. She says I’m fine. Hernan tells Ferno that he doesn’t have to worry, because he’ll be there at her side. You know what I think? I think Ferno and Victoria will be condemned to Purgatory and that Ferno and Victoria will be connected to each other by a blood pressure machine which Ferno will have to monitor for at least two eternities.

There is a short conversation between Alex and Ferno that I couldn’t quite get because I couldn’t hear it. Fill in, please. Ferno tells Alex that this all doesn’t concern him because he’s not a member of the family, but that he’ll be in his office if he’s needed.

Raquel’s “taxi” pulls up to Uli’s apartment. She yells “stop” to the driver. Mau just happened to be in the neighborhood so she thought she’d drop in. That girl sure gets around in one day. Raquel plays coy, while the driver leans across the front seat in an attempt to overhear their conversation. Mau assures Raq that she’s only interested in one man, Alex. The driver shouts out much to Raq’s disgust who gets in the car and tells him to just go.

The lawyers begin the pissing contests. Alex’s lawyer says that Sr. Antonio with all his faculties intact chose to leave the majority of his wealth to Alex. Bruno’s lawyer says that his client claims that Antonio was not lucid. Vickie interrupts and says no way, my husband was completely normal. Now they want to hear from Hernan who knew Antonio for many years. Hernan says that Antonio was his friend and was in complete control of his mental faculties until the moment he died. He merely broke a leg, but his blood pressure and mental capacity were perfect. Vickie relates that Bruno did not apply himself at school and did not complete his studies, and didn’t get along with anyone. That was one reason why her husband left Alex everything.

One of the lawyers asks her if Antonio didn’t name Alex because he was Antonio’s legitimate son, child of his first wife. Hernan says that had nothing to do with it. Antonio loved Bruno and Raquel, too. Further, Bruno alleges that Sra. Victoria had an extramarital affair with Sr. Lombardo and that union produced Bruno and Raquel. The shyster in white says that everything that is said in that room will remain confidential, but even if Bruno has little chance of winning, he holds a powerful weapon – that Alex doesn’t want his stepmother “prejudiced”, or that is to say, have her name dragged through the mud. So, if they can’t come to some agreement, everything will be made public. Everyone in Merida will know that things aren’t as they appear.

Alex steps up and calls them all a bunch of “sinverguenzas” (shameless SOB’s) and that that they are exploiting his mother for that “infeliz” (rotten, miserable person). Bruno just wants power and money and he can have it. No, says Victoria, your father was a just and fair man and he made a decision based on Bruno’s behavior that Bruno was not worthy to occupy the position he now demands. She takes her leave. Alex tells Hernan to go with her.

Hernan invites her into his office for a rest, but she says she wants to go home. Out of no where Ferno appears and Vickie asks him to take her home. So, what happened to the silver Rolls?

Back in the conference room, Alex gives the seated legal-beagle array, the “she is more than my mother speech.” She was always loving to me but she had a jealous and vengeful son. Alex tells them that he is disposed to make a settlement (arreglo). Alex’s lawyer tells Alex and the other lawyers that it will take a few days to draw up an agreement. Bruno’s lawyers agree that they, too, want to avoid a scandal.

At their cabana, Roberto reads the newspaper “Merida Hoy” and notes to Raquel that Alex is in the public eye again. Raquel says, “right” and Roberto asks her if it isn’t important to her. She says, of course, they are always worried about bad press. Roberto just doesn’t understand how all this can be happening and how Bruno is threatening to contest Antonio’s will. Roberto asks her if she’s spoken to Bruno. She says, no. How about Alex? Nope. Do it, says Roberto. Raquel then parks her butt on Roberto’s lap and asks him if he thinks there is something between Maura and Ulises. Roberto becomes a little pissed over that and explains to her that Ulises can do as he pleases, he’s a man who lives off the world and he knows him well. He dumps Raq and she grabs the paper.

At Mau’s mansion, Mau tells Uli, who is wearing orange trousers and is standing in front of a pink sofa, that he did good because Alex is looking for Mario Aguire in every hotel. Uli tells her that Roberto thinks that Bruno hired Mario. Uli tells Mau that this is going to be hard to keep up. She says that’s why I’ve paid you. They now realize that they are in over their heads. I think they came to an agreement that they are going to have to come up with somebody else somehow.

Bruno, Eric and a friend (the stuntman?) are having a drink at a bar. They discuss the place where something is to happen and Bruno hands the man an envelope for which the man is thankful. Eric looks uncomfortable and may be having second thoughts. Bruno asks him what’s up, you’re not sorry now, are you. Eric says OK.

Alex arrives at the Lombardo mansion and asks Felipa, who always looks pleasant because that expression has been surgically planted on her face, where is mother? She’s in her room resting. Maria Jose? He asks hopefully. She’s with her sister eating with Pedro. Bruno? She hasn’t seen him. She wants to know if he’s eaten. He says, yes, in the office. Felipa lectures him about that and warns him that if he keeps that up he’ll get skinny and sick. Alex sighs and heads up the stairs.

In the city, Eric and Paula have a little before school chat. He wants to know why she looks like she’s having a problem and wants to know if she and her sister had a fight. No, she says. He doesn’t like to see her like this. Tell me, he says. She says she can’t say anything and has to go to class. OK, says Eric who has clearly fallen for Paula. He’ll be there waiting for her.

At casa Lombardo, Alex tells Maria Jose about his miserable day and about the threats against Victoria. Alex tells her that he wants to solve the problem immediately, but Victoria doesn’t want it to happen. There is something about this Alex doesn’t understand. Victoria feels betrayed. All this has been going on for over thirty years, etc. He doesn’t want to hurt Victoria. How many times are we going to have to hear that? They talk about the “Lombardo” name – like maybe Bruno would have to give it up because then everyone would know something is up. Alex reminds her that Bruno is out for vengeance and he just can’t understand why Bruno throws it all back on his own mother.

Mary Jo flashes back to a conversation she had with Bruno in which he said that in addition to one half of the Lombardo wealth, he also wants her to divorce Alex. Alex asks her if she’s OK. She says, yes, takes her hand and says let’s go to the bedroom. Always the spoilsport, Mary Jo picks up papers that relate to her father’s apartment. Alex gives her the same speech – do you think this money is important to me? She’s grateful, but it’s important to her. Alex tells her that they are husband and wife, etc., and he’ll look at the papers later. He wants to eat now.

At the police station, Chucho and Julia complete the paperwork to get Mechita out of jail. Well, Julia signs and they go ahead. I don’t think Chucho is able to write his name. Mechita is so grateful to them and that she will pay back “hasta el ultimo peso.”

Eric and Paula are driving in the dark. He tries to get information out of her. All she says is that Bruno is trying to hurt Alex, and that hurts her. Then she has a very bright idea – let me drive. Eric stops and let’s her take the wheel. Somebody is waiting in the shadows. A smiling Paula drives on when she hits someone whose face she can see on the windshield. She screams and loses total control. Eric gets out and pulls the man she supposedly hit over to the side of the road. None other than Chucho happens to be at the exact spot where the accident occurred and is witness to the whole dirty deed. Paula keeps screaming, “Is he dead, is he dead?” Eric takes off. Paula is hysterical.

Chucho goes over to the “dead” man who, of course, is not dead. We know that because the man gets up and runs away. Chucho thinks some kind of miracle has happened and starts praying.

When Eric and Paula arrive at casa Lombardo, Paula is still distraught, and Eric tries to tell her that nothing happened. “How can you say that,” she asks? Eric tells her that he’ll take care of everything. He checks the car out. As Paula enters, Zeke comes out of the shadows and greets her with a “Buenos noches, senorita, has something happened to you?” For some reason he is holding a lit candle below his face even though there are dim lights on in the room. Maybe this is just to intensify the suspense. He tells her that Mary Jo is in Alex’s room. She heads up the magic staircase.

A shirtless Bruno is on the phone with Eric who tells him that everything went well and that Paula is out of it. He’s OK says Eric. The body disappeared, says Eric. Eric tells him that something is going on between Paula and Mary Jo. Bruno is happy with the report.

Chucho blesses himself and knocks on Pedro’s door. He asks Pedro for a beer and tells him something happened, but he needs a beer for courage. The beer does wonders for Chucho. He tells Pedro about the accident and about dead man on the highway who suddenly got up and ran away and that it scared him to death. Their little joke: Pedro: “ What did the man say to you?” Chucho: “Nothing. Dead men can’t talk.” Pedro says nothing happened. Chucho thinks the man flew away. Isn’t this just like a conversation between Einstein and Edison?

At home, Mechita, who was in jail, talks to a man who is in bed and appears to be disabled. His name is Gabriel and she tells him not to worry. Julia told him what happened and he was very worried. She tells him she’s in trouble and probably won’t have work. He wants to go somewhere, but she tells him he has to wait. She wants to get enough money together for him to see a doctor to look at his legs. He’s crying because he can’t work.

Zeke and Raq’s driver discuss the day. Paula arrived scared and crying. Zeke corrects the driver’s diction. Anyway the driver tells Zeke that Raq had him drive to a house and that he is not to tell anyone the address. Zeke says that he knows everything that goes on in this house. They didn’t go anyplace special, just here and there.

In the morning, Paula goes to see Eric in her pajamas. He tells her not to worry, nobody knows anything. She’s still very worried. But, there’s nothing in the newspaper. He says it was an accident and that the man was a drunk. Sh-t happens he tells her.

Alex wakes up with Mary Jo in his arms. He rolls her over and snuggles her before getting up. Cut to Vic’s room.

Felipa tells Vic she should stay in bed, but Vic feels well enough to get up and get dressed. Felipa tells Vic that Alex wants to speak to her.

Alex tells Mary Jo he has to go to the office and that they’ll eat together later. He hands her an envelope with money for her personal needs and that of her sister and father. He doesn’t want his wife to go out without “a quinto”. She says, no, no, but he insists and kisses her goodbye.

Alex runs into Felipa in the hallway. He asks about his mother and Felipa tells him she’s waiting in her room. Obsessive/compulsive Felipa straightens out a picture on the wall.

Mary Jo is vomiting into the toilet. We know what that means. But, does it dawn on her? Looks like it’s a yes. She says she has to hide this. Later she goes to Pedro’s cabana where she finds a weeping Paula who tells her that Pedro probably left with Chucho. What’s the matter, asks Mary Jo? “I killed a man” cries Paula. “Are you crazy?” asks Mary Jo. “I killed him, I killed him last night. It was an automobile accident.” “How could this happen?” asks Mary Jo. She was with Eric. Paula gets up, runs out of the cabana followed by Mary Jo. Mary Jo wants to know why Paula was with him – he can’t be trusted. Paula yells back, you’re always criticizing me for something. Anyway, what the H—l is she wearing? It looks like it should be at the top of the Clothes that Hurt List.

Bruno of course appears in the background and tells Mary Jo to let her go. But she’s desperate says Mary Jo. He knows Paula hit a man. In Fernando Escandon* fashion, Bruno slithers around Mary Jo like an insane snake. I know she hit a man and killed him and now you (plural) cannot be saved, he whispers in Mary Jo’s ear.

Avances: More of the same.

*The Devil Incarnate in Fuego en la Sangre.

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