Caray, Caray!

　

Good Evening Ladies and Gentleman, the Patio was in an uproar this evening about some of the characters and their actions this evening. The writers for this TN are hiding out right now in order not to be pelted with rotten tomatoes, and bad second bananas. The writers have released the following statement:

Dear Patio of Lowered Expectations:

What did you expect? This is not a full fledged comedy, we have to include the tragedy sometime. We are striving to get some of the bad stuff out of the way so that we can write some more comedy. We know that all of you detest the procelin throne, and the threatening *leo*, but we have to move this story forward so we can get to the good stuff. Please be patient and trust in us and we will soon get back to the comedy and light heartedness you love, trust us!

Sincerely, and we do mean sincerely,

The Writers

Now let's see what happened to our characters this evening.

We start tonight with Polita and Jean Marie and the chisme about Kendho showing up at Ms. Vikki's Birthday Party. Dances is pithed tells Polita and Jean Marie to git and they do, so Polita can go eat cake. He calls Kendho who crows that Ms Vikki was sick, dissed the partay, and that this will drive Quad F into her arms, doncha know. Dances warns her not to be so sure bout that. Kendho assures Dances she has Nikki right where she wants her, that Nikki owes her a big favor she is gonna collect on soon. Kendho tells him no worries, go be with the washed out Betty, for shame we scream on the Patio. Kendho hangs up on Dances and then throws the phone, and says Ouch in Ingles. Sergio Sendel she ain't. Jus' sayin'.

Next we have Ms Vikki and Tomi and Tomi offers her support to Ms Vikki. Ms Vikki tells Tomi is going to her sanctum sanctorium and goes. She looks at a picture of Nikki and is very verklept about what is goin' on with her. She gets that marvelous book of poetry by Amado Nervo and reads a passage. Angel comes in and quotes the rest. Ms Vikki is surprised that the Angel knows this poetry. But of course he does, his Mama used to read it and it is a good massager for the soul, doncha know. Angel wants to know why Ms Vikki is so very sad. Ms Vikki is very surprised the Angel can discern her mood, he's only known her such a short time. Angel tells her he can tell, cause the eyes are the windows to the soul Ms Vikki's eyes are so sad. Ms Vikki tells the Angel about Nikki's bulimia. Ms Vikki is very scared and doesn't know how to help her. The Angel suggests love and support for Nikki, from her Mama. That wouldn't be enough Ms Vikki opines. She has heard of bulimia of course, but never imagined this would happen in her family. The Angel tells her he don't know much about that, but she has his full support. We'll get back to them.

Now we have Betty with Pau2, who Betty seems to have spent the night with. Betty agonizes about Guillo, she hasn't heard anything from him and is scared witless. Betty is thinking that *leo* can take Guillo away from her. Pau2 surprisingly tells Betty that no, that can't happen. The law is on Betty's side. Betty thinks that *leo* knows she's dating Dances and now there will be a heapin' amount of trouble. Pau2 doesn't think that the horrid one can do anything, Betty works to provide for all of Guillo's needs. Betty is gonna go see a lawyer, and Pau2 agrees this is the best thing yet. The lawyer will reassure Betty and hey, maybe the horrid one will return Guillo. Betty doesn't know if she wants to go to work, but Pau2 tells her, at the moment, it is the best thing she can do. Betty thinks Pau2 is right, she'll go to work, show the judge she can support her son and thanks her Mama Pau2 for being there to support her.

Ruh, Roh, looky here, what have we got. Oh, noes we have Felipe in a card game with El Turco, ya know the guy who Tomi had to bring the ransom, er, money to, so Felipe wouldn't swim with the fishes, ya know the previous gambling debt??? Well, appartantly Felipe is at it again. Betting his life, er, Betty's divorce money, to try to get more, so that he can pay for that and a new place for her and Guillo. Anyhoo, so Felipe has lost, he wants another game to recoup the money, or a loan from El Turco, where or where has Felipe's brain gone, long time passing. Well, El Turco is givin' him the stinkeye. Sucks to be Felipe.

Now we have Cris and Lili and Cris is needin' some advice. She needs the advice for what to wear, or in this case what not to wear for her first day of work with the 'ho, ya know Kendho. Cris just wants to wear the right thing, be elegant, cause Kendho is famous, doncha know. Cris is a tad nervous and Cris just wants to make a good first impression so that Kendho won't regret givin' Cris this job. Lili tells her the dresses, there are two, are both fab, just pick one. Lili wants to know if Cris and Kendho are goin' to M.I. tomorrow, cause she wants Cris to ask Betty about Guzmi, as in married, or not married? Cris still thinks that Guzmi is single, but hey what if in fact, he is married to Polita???? Lili laughs it off by telling Cris that Polita is upset too, about Guzmi being maybe married, so it just can't be her. Lili is just for sure, that Guzmi is the one for her. Cris says it was this way with the Angel when she met him, too. Smiles and hugs.

Now we cut to Guzmi and a sleeping Nikki and Guzmi thinks it is so great that now Ms Vikki, her Mama is on to her little secret of being addicted to the procelin throne and that it took courage to come clean. She'll overcome this.

We are back with Ms Vikki and the Angel and they are looking up bulimia on the internet. Now Ms Vikki sees that bulimia can sometimes be fatal. She really didn't expect that. What to do, what to do?? She doesn't want Nikki to die. Angel is very supportive and tells Ms Vikki, Nonsense woman, get her to a doctor, get her treatment and things will work out in other words. Ms Vikki doesn't know if she is strong enough, after all Quad F told her this was all her fault, doncha know. Well, Angel has had it up to here with Quad F already and begs to differ, no way, no how is that f'ing putz right. Angel tells her to buck up, be strong for her Nikki, cause if this happened to Lil Orchid, he would for sure do everything he could to save her. And Ms Vikki, darn tootin' is the same. So Ms Vikki agrees and as they gaze into each others eyes, they say they are very similar in feelings, er in how they view their girls. Oh, crap, here we go with more heartache, cause here comes Quad F all decked out in what looks to me like some crappy paislyish robe, and struts right on down those stairs for a guilt layin' trip so to speak, and asks if he is interrupting, ya think??? Ms Vikki informs Quad F that her and the Angel were lookin' up info on bulimia. Well, shouldn't she be doing this with her eva lovin' hubby, NOT!!!!! Like he really gives a crap. Anyhoo, the Angel excuses himself from this fracas and tells Ms Vikki she knows where he'll be and he goes. So now Quad F says the stupidest thing I've ever heard, wait for it, even though Ms Vikki and Quad F no longer do the nastay, er have martial relations doesn't mean he isn't Nikki's Snappy Papi, ok, I am interrupting here, he could care less bout Nikki, since when, when, has he ever been a proper Papa???? He needs that cast iron skillet, better yet, let's toss him down the Staircase of Doom, jus' sayin. Ok, mini rant over. So Ms Vikki tells him like it is. So act like Nikki's Papa she tells him. He seems to be thinking this is all Ms Vikki's fault, he made light of the fact that Nikki really isn't sick, etc and he now accuses Ms Vikki of calling the Angel to console, er, talk to. She lets ole Quad F have it, she wants him to think what he wants, all she cares about is Nikki and her health problem and he can go straight to hell, er he ruined her night, thank you very much and she goes.

Meanwhile, in the bodyguard quarters, the Angel is havin' a little rant of his own. Quad F is very selfish, how can he just diss, er not help Ms Vikki or his daughter Nikki, what a toss down the Staircase of Doom wouldnt' cure, er Quad F is a nasty, nasty man.

Guzmi is keeping watch over Nikki and gets up to caress her cheek as she is sleeping, such love and sweetness is eminating from his eyes as he gazes down on her. Ms Vikki comes to releive Guzmi. He needs to get his rest she says and she is taking over the midnight watch, so to speak. Ms Vikki will be sleeping with her bebe and can't beleive just a bit ago, Nikki told her Mama that she felt fat and ugly. Guzmi says but, but she's beautiful, before he can catch himself and apologizes. Ms Vikki says no need for apologies and that Guzmi is right. Nikki is very beautiful. So Ms Vikki tells Guzmi to rest, but now another mini anvil aimed at our hapless Felipe, Guzmi returns the money he borrowed from Ms Vikki that Tomi took to El Turco so Felipe wouldn't sleep with the fishes, got that? Captas???? Anyhoo, Ms Vikki is surprised and asks him if maybe he still doesn't need it, nah not some much, been paid in full, doncha know. Poor Guzmi he can't win for losing, jus' sayin'. So Guzmi tells Ms Vikki that if she needs him, he is on call. He goes and Ms Vikki snuggles up to her precious girl. Now it is morning and Nikki is the first one awake and is surprised to see her Mama sleepin with her and wakes her Mama by sayin' Super Mami (in Ingles) Hello!!! Nikki wants to know why she spent the night with her. Ms Vikki just wanted to be with Nikki to comfort and help her, and Nikki thinks that maybe, just maybe Snappy Pappy and her Super Mami had a fight, when Tomi comes in with breakfast. Tomi has brought breakfast to the Queen and Princess of the house. Awwww. Is this enough asks Tomi, more than enough and with that Tomi goes. So now Ms Vikki is telling Nikki they are going to see one Dr. Iriarte, who it seems is Nikki's regular doctor, to get a consult for a specialist. Nikki agrees to what eva her Mama wants. Nikki starts gorging on the food in front of her Mama. Ms Vikki looks very verklempt as Nikki wolfs down the food.

So now we have Betty all ready for her workday. Pau2 has leant Betty a dress and has made her up for her workday. I must say that Pau2 has taken a light hand with Ms Betty's makeup. So Betty tells Pau2 she is gonna go by the horrid one's house (sorry y'all I can't dignify this putz with the name, just sayin' we all know who he is) and see if Guillo is ok. Pau2 wants to go with but Betty is firm and says she'll call her Mama afterwards and tell her everything is honkey dorey. So now Betty goes and gets a text message as she waits for the elevator. It is from Dances and it says: Hope you had a great night, he did cause he dreamt about her and he can't wait to see her. Santino. Awwww. We on the Patio are yelling at Betty to turn around and call in sick or answer that text already!!!! We will get back to Betty.

So now we have Guzmi and Ms Vikki on the Landing of Doom, and she tells Guzmi that she is taking Nikki to her regular doctor, Nikki has agreed to this, Nikki ate her breakfast, but Ms Vikki is concerned that Nikki will go talk to the procelin throne. Anyballs picks this moment to stop at the Landing of Doom and both greet him, he is on the way to the office. He wants to know if she is feeling better, ya know the "blood pressure" problem. Oh, she's fine, Nikki is awake, in the shower, and as a matter of fact, Ms Vikki is taking the day off to "recuperate" and Anyballs thinks that's fine. Anyballs tells her to have a great day and he goes. Ms Vikki tells Guzmi gotta go check on Nikki before she hurls, er talks to the procelin throne. She goes.

Meantime, Nikki has the shower running, but she ain't in it. She is lookin' at the food again, taking bites of it, hating herself and she cries alot. The pull of the procelin throne is too much for our hapless little Nikki and she is talkin' to it so to speak, when Ms Vikki comes in and sees it. Que Horror! Ms Vikki so doesn't want her to be doin' this, but Nikki says she can't help it, it is so much bigger than her, she's helpless to stop it. Lots of hugs and crying of buckets of tears. I am sad to say this recapper is cryin' right along with them. I need a good stiff drink, jus' sayin'.

I had to belay the stiff drink for this scene though. I just want to stick a fork in the horrid one. So Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho, it's off to work Betty goes when she is grabbed by the horrid one. Que Horror. He informs her, while he has a tight grip on her shoulders and hair and he is yanking that hair, that he has been following, er stalking her, he knows who she's with and where she's been and she is so gonna pay for that. Betty wants to know where her son is. We on the Patio are screaming, Betty scream, kick him in the nuts, take your nails and poke his eyes and run, all to no avail. She is petrified and really can't move or make a move for that matter. He says he is in control, er charge of his son, he is so takin' care of him, not like his Mama who runs around like run around Sue not taking care of their son. Now poor Betty has taken to beggin' for her son back. She loves Guillo so much she wants him back. Well the horrid one tells her sorry babe, no can do. Neva gonna happen. She duped him by takin their son on the sly and he ain't forgiving her for making him, er, treating him like he is stupid, doncha know, and besides he's her abuser, controller, boss of her, er, her husband. She begs him to let her go already, she has to go to work. She don't need to go to damn work, cause he is the provider, doncha know. He gave her everything and besides he is her huband forever and ever and ever.... Betty wants to be let go of and to take a walk and talk calmly. Why didn't anyone pass by and rescue this woman, poor thing, she is being slobbered on and held in a neck hold and noone passes by. For shame I tell you. We in the Patio are in an uproar. We will get back to Betty and he who shall remain nameless.

Now we are back to that bathroom of Nikki's which is awash in tears and hugs and consoling. Nikki can't stop the eating and procelin throne hugging and Ms Vikki promises to do all in her power to help her precious little girl whateva it takes. Nikki doesn't think she has the strength to carry on, but her Mama Vikki begs to differ. She will be there for Nikki no matter what. She swears. She will be her rock, Nikki ain't gonna be an island with no support, cause her Mama will always, repeat always be there in good times and bad whateva it takes. Captas, Nikki. Nothing is gonna stop them now. So Nikki is very gratefull and cries in ther Mama's arms. Mama cries too and Guzmi just happens to see this scene and remains silent and watches this heart rending scene.

Now back to that walk in the park, unfortunately. They are havin' a walk in the park just like ole times babe, is what the horrid one says to Betty. He continues to give her unwanted kisses, and Betty is horrified and tries to avoid them as best she can. There is also noone around them, no person in the park but them. How can this be??? This is the middle of the freakin' day. Anyhoo, Betty has been thinkin about that song, I Will Survive, cause she is thinkin to herself. First I was afraid, I was petrified. Kept thinkin' I could never live without you by my side, but then I spent so many nights thinkin' how you did me wrong, and I grew strong, I learned how to get along. So now Betty finds her spine and tells the horrid one how it really is. She tells him she used to love him and that she was a good wife. He begs to differ and says she was, till she packed up all her stuff and left him. She has to tell him, he is dense ya know, that she left him cause he mistreated her and hit her constantly. Well, of all the horrid things to say, but look who's talkin', he informs her she deserved everthing he dished out to her and see how things can be resolved when there is talkin going on? I want that cast iron skillet STAT!!!!! So Poor Betty asks what she has to do to get Guillo back? Well she has to get back with the horrid one of course. Betty tells the horrid one, Neva, eva eva, not gonna happen. He can't beleive his ears, they were havin' such a great time till she changed. Well, that only lasted a short time, cause then his jealousy and bitterness kicked in and it was the same ole cycle that just keeps goin' round and round. She loved him in the past, yes, but not now, not eva. He turned the love into fear and er, loathing, jus' sayin'. Well he has some sage, er threatening advice for Betty. Either she gets back with him, and he has a hold of her again, or he will kill her and then himself. Betty is beyond terrified now and is just verklempt.

Meanwhile at the offices of Meta Imagen, Gilda and Dances are wondering why Betty hasn't come into work yet. Dances has brought Betty some coffee. Gilda says Betty is so always on time, she can't think of where she could be. Gilda asks Dances about his status with Betty, ya know they seeing each other, he doesn't have to answer. Dances doesn't like to kiss and tell, Gilda knows this. Gilda just likes Betty alot and doesn't want to see her hurt, doncha know, if only they knew. Dances has no intention of hurting Betty.

So now we have the Kendho/ Quad F phone call. The Ho is commisserating about his shoddy treatment before all "his" friends that Quad F got cause of the partay interruptus. Ok, hang on a sec, weren't these Ms Vikki's friends???? Jus sayin'. Anyhoo, Kendho just wanted to hear his voice, oh yuk. Quad F says Ms Vikki is on his last nerve. Kendho just wanted to kiss and hug him. He informs Kendho that things are bad between his wifey pooh and him and now she is "using" Nikki to cause more problems. Not only is Quad F short in the mental department, if he really wanted to fool his wife, wine and dine her, act real sorry, bow and scrape, lick her shoes, ya know act like he's sorry. Anyhoo, Anyballs picks this time to walk into Quad F's office and the F'er makes like it is a bidness call. Kendho gets the drift and tells the Quad she'll be thinking about him all day long, stop up and see her, besitos and click. We'll get back to Quad F and Anyballs.

So now we have a little convo with Tomi and Ms Vikki. Tomi is so troubled to hear that Nikki is so not well. Tomi does love Nikki as if she were her own. Ms Vikki tells Tomi that Nikki needs their support. Tomi just cannot understand Quad F's reaction to Nikki's illness. Ms Vikki is more and more disappointed by Quad F everyday.

Meanwhile, back to Anyballs and Quad F in the office. Quad F is bitchin' bout Ms Vikki of course. Quad F is pithed the surprise partay didn't go over well as well as that oh, so expensive necklace he got her. Well, Anyballs explains that mistakes like Quad F's are expensive, doncha know. Anyballs reminds him that having an affair with someone in the office will take Ms Vikki a long time to get over and if Quad F really wants Ms Vikki back it will take some time and effort on Quad F's part. So now Quad F promises to do just that and now Anyballs has a question for Quad F, he still got the same amante???? Hmmmmm? So Quad F, the lyin' liar, assures Anyballs it was only the one time, and Anyballs warns him if he finds out anything to the contrary he is kickin' his sorry ass from the house and to the curb!!!! Got that????? Quad F is verklempt!

Guzmi and Angel are having a cafecito in the kitchen and talkin' about Nikki of course. Guzmi is lamenting about how he has been tryin' so hard to help Nikki and the Angel says he is glad Ms Vikki now knows what the hey is going on. Angel informs Guzmi about what he and Ms Vikki found on the internet about bulimia. Even with treatment there are occurances of a relapse. How the constant communing with the procelin throne can ruin the enamel in the teeth, effect the internal organs, just everything. To recover a person must be very strong, but in Nikki's case she never wants to accept responsiblity. Angel doesn't know what he'd do in the same position, it would drive him flipping crazy. Speakin' of Lil Orchid she has come in and greets her Papa with one big ole hug. Now Angel knows he is gonna have a good day. Lil Orchid reminds her Papa Angel that it is Cris' first day at work for Kendho. Looks are exchanged between Guzmi and the Angel.

Now on to said Cris who is now with Kendho at her place, hoping she is dressed properly. Kendho has bestowed upon our Cris a new nickname of Cristy. Kendho assures Cristy that she is lookin' good and as a matter of fact she will help Cristy with a new "luke", ok what about this "luke" word? I'll tell you. When I recapped UFCS this word was used constantly. The reason is that when the actors said the word look, ya know as in the look of clothes, it comes out sounding like they are saying "luke" hence the word. So now Cristy wants to know what her job is gonna be? Well, first Kendho wants to congrat her on her new job, Cristy is very great at convincing her hubby the Angel that she wanted this job with Kendho. Cristy pishshaws this and says The Angel is very strong but good inside and told her if she really wanted the job to go for it. Kendho tells Cristy that for this job she needs to be very discreet. Cristy agrees and so now it is on to the job. Cristy will be in charge of Kendho's closet, the cleaning of it, also laying out clothes for Kendho, keeping her appointment book, making payments for things, keeping a diary, also organizing meetings, photo events and so much more. Cristy is lookin' a little verklempt. Anyhoo, also ordering food for the fridge. Well Cristy offers to go buy whatever she needs from the market. Kendho says why waste the time, they deliver doncha know. So now Kendho informs Cristy she can start with the closet. Cristy wants to know where she is goin' in case someone calls. Well, Kendho is going to see Vikki at the Balvanera Manse. Cristy wants to come too, to see the Angel and then thinks she overstepped, but Kendho says, nah you are my assitant so come with. They go.

So now we are in the offices of Meta Imagen and we see, with a great sigh of relief on the Patio, that Betty has made it into work. Quad F is informing Betty to transfer to the board room, he has a meeting. Betty says no probs. Dances is about to go with Quad F when he tells him to stay, kinda like a well trained dog. So Dances stays and approaches Betty at the desk. Betty is barely holding it together. He says something so isn't right with Betty, she is acting strangely and she never answered his text, she tells him she just couldn't answer him. She informs Dances what happened as far as the horrid one threatening her to get back together with him, the horrid one stole her son, and she is gonna die. Dances is very concerned for our Betty as she cries.

So now we are on to the Balvanera Manse, where Kendho and Cristy are in the hall. Cristy didn't know that Ms Vikki was ill. Kendho informs Cristy that Ms Vikki blew out her candle on her cake and then went to bed, and by the way shhhh, here comes Ms Vikki who greets them. Kendho asks how Ms Vikki is feeling and Ms Vikki says better. Ms Vikki congrats Cristy on her new job and by the way could you give her and the 'ho, er Kendho a moment we need to be alone for a discussion. She says sure no problemo and Kendho and Ms Vikki go off. So Angel comes and greets Cristy and drags her off to the kitchen so she won't have the urge, er opportunity to eavesdrop and they go.

So now we have Kendho and Ms Vikki in the library and Ms Vikki is calling Kendho, Ms Ferretti instead of Kendho and I bet Kendho has the feeling she is in soooo much trouble. Why is Ms Vikki callin' Kendho, Ms Ferretti, stead of Kendho, they are friends, si? Yes, they are but Ms Vikki is so pithed that Kendho would do something so despicable and Kendho has the deer in the headlights look, so to speak, cause I bet the first thing Kendho is thinkin' is that Ms Vikki knows about the red headed boinking epi, but nah not so much. Now Ms Vikki says she knows all and wants to hear it from Kendho's own lips, speak Kendho, SPEAK. Will Kendho be truthy, will she know exactly what Ms Vikki is gettin' at? Here is where we end this epi.

Avances Esta Lunes:

Salsero has a gun pointed directly at the horrid one's head. You go Salsero, it is time for some payback.

Angel and Kendho argue. Tune in Esta Lunes to find out what happens next.

Labels: Amores