Caray, Caray!

Ric goes to the prison infirmary to visit a still living Marilu.  She's still feeling suicidal, on account of him wanting to divorce her.  The nurse adds something…a sedative, I hope…to Marilu's IV bag.  Ric reminds her she did commit a crime, y'know…killing Fabi's baby and nearly killing Fabi.  Marilu's sorry and all, but she still doesn't want Ric to "abandon" her.  He says he won't just as she drifts off again.

A tech swabs Alina's cheek and tells Inés they'll have the results in a week.  Alina checks in with Raquel in the lobby and brags about how it didn't hurt her one bit when Raquel complains.  Lucina fends off Alina's questions about why--if this is just something to check that Alina and Raquel are healthy--Lucina and Inés aren't getting tested too, by inviting everyone for a burger and fries…yum!  Lucina and Alina lead the way out of the lobby as Raquel now complains to Inés, of all people, about how bossy and nosy Lucina is and, ugh, how annoying.

Jackie has decided to stay in Hermosillo and maybe take over Mariano's clinic.  Rosa has two other kids to take care of, though, so she has to go back.  Tears all around as mom and daughter say goodbye.

Homero goes over to Paloma's to share his theory that Jose Luis gave Inés The CD.  Paloma doubts it, thinking that Inés would have told her…well, sure, she's lied to her before…but it's not likely she would have agreed to keep the CD…would she?  Homero tells her that the head of The Organization knows that Inés has The CD and he needs it to bring them down.  Leonardo interrupts the conversation by wheeling Fabiola in.  She's doing better, and feeling a little better emotionally.  Homero starts singing the praises of Leo and Fabi's relationship. He can only take so much lovey-dovey-ness, though, so he takes his leave.

Jackie goes over to JL's to ask him for the original of The CD.  She tells him she wants to bring the organization down.  JL says "no," on account of there being other wackos like Samuel lurking out there.  JL asks her if Mariano would want  her to go on this revenge rampage.  He tells her to let the dead rest in peace.  "Do all the charity work you want, but don't get into the vengeance gig."  He says goodbye to her because he's leaving, though he's cryptic about where he's going.

Inés tells Paloma that she and Alina are going on vacation with JL this weekend.  Paloma has gotten tired of arguing with her.  She changes the subject to Homero's visit and theories about The CD.  Inés doesn't hide her reaction very well and Paloma doesn't quite believe that Inés doesn't have The CD.  She points out that if Inés has it, she's putting herself and Alina at risk of death or kidnapping.  Inés caves, but whines that she doesn't want to hand it over because it's JL's life insurance policy.  "So you'd rather they kill you or Alina?"  Paloma says if Homero guessed that Inés had it, so can someone else.  "But, but, but…he's my baby daddy!"  Inés is in full-on denial mode about JL being a criminal or a killer.  Paloma tries to put her foot down and says this needs to end.  She wants Inés to hand over the CD to Homero ASAP.

Fabi gets the update on Matilde from Cesar.  She feels bad that her mom's locked up.  Cesar is hopeful that one of the other employees who hasn't testified yet will have noticed her incompetence and cluelessness and will tell the cops about it.  Fabi, ever sweet, says even if their mom was horrid, she still loves her.  Cesar agrees.  But he also says she had it coming.  She didn't want to listen to Ruben when he tried to warn her.  She insisted on always thinking she was better and smarter than everybody else.  He's sure she'll get out soon enough.

Paloma asks Alina about the hospital visit and then takes her to see Fabiola.  Alina talks about borrowing Fabi's cell because her mom "never" lets Alina borrow hers.  So, see, she does say "no" sometimes.

Ricardo, predictably, doesn't want Inés and Alina going on vacation with JL.  She pretty much blames it on Alina, because she doesn't want to disappoint her.  Ric accuses her of being manipulated by a criminal, of being naïve.  He thinks JL will spend the whole vacation crying and trying to convince Inés to go back to him and that she'll cave.  When he finds out she doesn't even know where they're going, he really flips his lid, asking if it hasn't occurred to her that JL could kidnap them.  He finally tells her that if she goes, then it is OVER between them because he's tired of JL interfering all the time.  He stalks off as Inés looks after him, confused, and says "kidnap us?"  As if having her followed and kept a prisoner in his house in no way implies that he would ever even think of such a thing.  Maybe this isn't Inés anymore.  We never did get a twin switch on this show.  Maybe Oriana was replaced by her clueless doormat of a sister…Boriana?  Snoriana?  Ignoriana?

Escalona explains to the cops that he needed the money to take care of his sick wife.  Antonio offered him the job, knowing he needed the money.  He admits he knew about the shady business.  He complains about Matilde's bad temper, but admits that Matilde didn't know a damn thing.  And he means that in a general sense, saying she couldn't even recite the 2 times table, much less what she was signing.  "We just made stuff up and she let us handle everything."  He agrees with the cop that she was a victim and is innocent.

Inés reports back to Paloma that Ric left in a huff.  "Well, what do you expect?  No man likes the idea of his fiancée going on vacation with her ex."  "Well, what do you want me to do!  I already told Jose Luis we'd go!"  Well, I'm not exactly a high society dame, but I believe according to Emily Post, you can cancel plans made with a lying, murdering, manipulative, narcissistic jackass that you only made under pressure from your spoiled, manipulative, diabolical offspring, as long as you do so in a handwritten note, on personalized stationary, with a big bottle of tequila or scotch.  And possibly flowers.  "But, but, but…he's sick!"  Paloma says that he should go to a doctor, then.  "You're just feeling guilty, so you're giving in to Alina and she's becoming a spoiled little smartass!"  Inés says Lucina mentioned the same thing.  Paloma asks her when she's going to hand over The CD to Homero.

Ric goes to complain to Homero about Inés going on vacation with JL.  Homero says JL was smart enough to keep his nose clean.  It looks like Antonio was in charge of everything.  Ric is furious that Homero can't help him salvage his train wreck of a love life by having JL locked up without proof.  Ric stomps off and Homero chokes back laughter.  He explains to Leo that Inés is smart, and if JL is leaving the country, he's going to want The CD to go with them, and Inés is going to suspect that he plans to kidnap them, and so she'll leave The CD behind.  Um, yeah.  That's hilarious.

Sebastian turns down Piero's offer of money from the Alleged Bank of Dad.  Sebastian remembers the day he asked Piero and Ricardo about Antonio being his dad and he remembers that Piero didn't say anything.  Piero reassures him that he and Ric took the DNA test and he is, in fact Sebastian's dad.  "I bet Ric is happy to finally be rid of me."  Piero says it's not like that.  "He never knew if he should treat you like a son or a brother, and so he made a lot of mistakes, but he does love you, I'm sure of that."  Piero says Ricardo has known that Piero is Sebastian's father for a long time.  He assures Seb that Ricardo wants to have a good relationship with him.

Jackie sits out on the patio with Lucina and Raquel and tells them that she couldn't get The CD from JL and that he's leaving the country but didn't say where he was going.  Raquel starts to steam.  Lucina tells Jackie to let it go, that Mariano wouldn't have wanted her to get revenge.  "Sometimes there are things you just can't do."  Raquel excuses herself.  Probably to go confront JL.

Who is busy taking psychotropic medication with alcohol.  He answers a call from Raquel, sobbing over him leaving the country without her and without "their" baby.  Well, he still thinks it's not his, but he says if it really is, they'd be leaving together.  He also says he's not planning on leaving, like, right now.  He angrily agrees to meet her tomorrow, maybe, since he has a meeting scheduled for today.  He hangs up the phone and realizes Jackie must have told her.

Inés explains to Paloma about the DNA test and using Raquel's baby as a distraction.  Paloma doesn't think it will be that easy, since she thinks he's still in luuuuurve with her.  Inés gets a call from JL and tells him they'll leave Saturday and come back on Monday.  He whines at what a short trip that is and tells her he's taking them to a [creepy, isolated] cabin in the mountains near some city called "El Real."  Neither one of them has ever heard of it, but JL has heard that it's a pretty little place.  Riiiiight.  He asks her to bring The CD so she doesn't have to be responsible for it.  After they get off the phone, Inés asks Paloma if she's ever heard of a place called "El Real."  Paloma hasn't and she doesn't want Inés to go in any case.

JL says to himself "Santo Domingo…finally!"

At Aresti Breton, we're treated to a presentation about next season's jeans from [Redacted Company that didn't pay for product placement in the American airing of the show].  Paulina can't help herself from exclaiming about how much she loves her [Redacted] jeans!

Inés tells an especially bratty and argumentative Alina that they're not going on vacation with JL after all, but Alina, in a way that's scarily reminiscent of her father, badgers Inés about it.  "Please, mom.  What's the big deal?"

Inés calls Lucina to tell her she's going on vacation with JL.  Lucina asks where they're going and she hasn't heard of "El Real" either, nor has Manolo.  "I guess it's a goodbye trip, right?  He told Jackie that he's leaving the country."  Lucina complains to Manolo that her stupid friend is going away on vacation with a criminal instead of cozying up with a Richie Ric.  Manolo asks about The CD, but Lucina says "How would I know?!"

Ric and Inés meet at Paloma's to make up yet again.  I mean, I won't know that for sure until he starts talking, but that's been par for the course, right?  He gives her a new cell phone, in case JL takes hers, and tells her that it has GPS and she should keep it on at all times.  He's never heard of "El Real" either and since the Internet doesn't exist on this show, none of them can look it up and see that, while there are any number of  eateries calling themselves, "El Real Mexican Grill," there is no easily located city named "El Real" in Mexico.  And, let me guess, Ms. Overly-Concerned-with-Politeness-Instead-of-Self-Preservation probably thinks it would be rude to ask him for the name and phone number of the mythical cabin in the mountains near the lost city of El Real where they'll be staying.  Inés begs Ric to understand that her spoiled brat of a kid has been through so much, and now that she's already set a bad precedent, she can't help giving in to her every whim.  Ric praises her for being such a badass babe (well, the REAL Oriana was, anyway) and apologizes for what he said yesterday, swearing that heeeeeeeeeeee will always love herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.  Inés tells Ric that maybe this is a goodbye trip, since JL told Jackie he's leaving the country.

Ric goes to report to Homero that Inés is going with JL to a town called "El Real."  Since Homero is the only character on this show who understands how to use all that new-fangled technology, he's looked it up and says there's no "El Real" on the map.  Ric announces that JL is leaving the country after.  Homero already knew that too.  He also knows that JL hasn't made any airline reservations, but that in this area there are lots of places to land a plane.  Ric thinks JL is planning to kidnap them, so Manolo and Homero tell him to tell Inés not to take The CD, that JL won't take them anywhere without it and Homero's convinced that Inés has it.  "Or maybe she wants to run off with him."  Ric is outraged at the suggestion.  He tells Homero about the new phone with GPS and Homero pats him on the head and gives him a gold star.  Manolo says he'll have people keep an eye on the locations around town where a plane can land.  As Ric jogs up the stairs, Homero tells him to tell Inés that it would be better to give him The CD.

Paloma tells Inés, again, not to go.  "I don't want to go either, grandma, but the writers have completely ruined my character and I'm incapable of saying 'no' to my daughter, even to save her life."  Paloma says she could never say "no" to Palomita, either, and look how that turned out.  Inés says she'll be more strict with her.  "Then start now!"  Before Inés can answer, Ric shows up and Alina goes running to him to happily tell him about going on vacation with her daddy.  "We're going to have a great time!"   Ric pretends to be happy about it and says he'll play with her in a sec…he just needs to say "hello" to her mom and her grandma.  "Oh, sure!  Everybody comes to say 'hi' to my mom and my grandma and they leave without playing with me!"  As Ric greets Paloma and Inés, Alina snots, "You're not coming back [to play with me], I already know it!" and goes off in a huff…like her prospective stepdad.  Wow, she's really inheriting all the best characteristics of the two dueling bucks, isn't she?  Paloma, Inés, and Ric sit down to chat.  Ric asks about The CD and Inés admits she has it, but she won't give it up because it's the only thing keeping her baby daddy from getting his lying, thieving, life-ruining, murdering self killed.  Ric and Paloma both have a "So?  What's it to you?" attitude about it.  Ric begs Inés to give him The CD, saying that JL has probably chartered a private plane to take them out of the country, but if Inés doesn't have The CD then he won't do it.

Inés gives The CD to Paloma and begs her not to give it to Homero until she comes back.  Once he has it, he'll set everything in motion and Inés wants to be home safe with Paloma when that happens.  Even though Paloma thinks Homero will protect Inés, she agrees.

Ric and Inés convo in the kitchen.  Please, people, not in the kitchen, I beg you!  Same arguments about JL being dangerous and Inés being in denial about it.  "Please don't worry.  We'll be fine."  "I love you, you're everything to me."  Blah, blah, blah.  No granite countertops were besmirched during the making of this scene…thankfully!

JL has his bag packed and he tells Martin that he doesn't know how long he'll be gone, but gives Martin and the rest of the staff time off.  He says he'll call when he gets back.  Raquel shows up just as JL is checking his stack of cash.  He tells Raquel it's a work trip.  "Everything's more important than me," she whines.  JL says he doesn't have time for her right now, but he does hand over the stack of cash to prove that he does think about her.  Raquel demands that he promise that he won't go off and leave her and he says he'll come back.  "Well, good.  I might have a surprise for you when you do…but you'll have to come back to find out what it is."  JL leaves, telling Raquel to make herself at home.  Which is funny knowing that he told the staff they can take off.

Alina says goodbye to Paloma, who wishes them a fun trip.  Alina says she will, since her good dad is back again.  Paloma tells Inés to call as soon as she knows where she is and to pay attention to the landmarks.  Nadia announces the arrival of JL and Alina grabs Tito and runs out.  Inés gets Paloma's blessing before she leaves.  Out in the courtyard, JL breaks it to Alina that Tito can't come with them, because they're taking a plane and Tito will get sick.  Alina says she'd rather have Tito with her than go on a plane.  JL pulls rank and tells Nadia to take the dog.  He can't get Alina to let go of the leash and ends up picking her up and putting her in the car.  He and Alina yell at each other as he buckles her into her seat.  "You can't take the dog everywhere!  You don't take him to school, do you?!"  "Well, when you go on vacation, you take your dog!"  "Enough!"  He slams the door and Inés, still outside the car, replies, "You're damn right that's enough!  This is OVER!"  She throws the car door open as Alina unbuckles her seatbelt and before JL can make it back around the car from the driver's side they both run into the house, bolting the door to the gate behind them.  All of Viewerville cheers as Inés immediately takes out her cell phone and calls Homero, telling him that he needs to get some cops out there ASAP to pick up JL and The CD. 

No?

OK, fine.

JL slams the car door and Inés, from the front seat, turns around and says to Alina in that overly-sweet tone she's acquired lately, "It's only three days, hon."  JL gets into the car and, presumably, they drive off.  I am so sorry to have to tell you that this is how it actually went down.  I wish I could have spared you the horror, disgust, disbelief, heartbreak.  Or maybe you've become numb.  Or you paid extra for the beanie upgrade.  Or instead of being disappointed in our new-and-not-so-improved Inés this is only heightening your anticipation of JL's ultimate comeuppance.  I don't know.  Mr. 5ft offers a small consolation…"At least the kid won't get the dog killed."  Yes.  Whatever else happens, let's try to preserve Tito.

Nadia tells Ric and Paloma about The Tito Incident v. 2.0.  Paloma is sure he's taking them out of the country.  She tells Ric she has The CD, but Inés made her promise not to give it to Homero yet.  Ric calls Manolo and tells him that JL did rent a plane.  Manolo will alert his men.  Paloma says if the cops show up, there could be a shootout!  Ric checks the app on his phone to see where they are, and it looks like they've stopped…

At a cottage-looking place.  As they get out of the car, Inés tells Alina that this looks like a nice place.  "There are probably a lot of animals in these woods…squirrels, birds…maybe even foxes."  Inés and Alina go into the cottage.  Alina says it's scary.  JL tells them there will be a cleaning lady coming in, but Inés will have to cook.  JL takes Alina to her room.  Inés notices the padlocks on all the windows.  When JL returns, alone, Inés complains that this isn't a vacation house.  JL says it's for safety.  "We're in the woods, after all. I'm sure Alina will love exploring outdoors here.  Especially seeing the…foxes."  He goes out to the car to get the bags, but first, he asks her for her cell phone and says she can call her grandmother with his phone if she needs to.  Inés hands over her official  phone and then freaks out as she realizes he's locking her in.

Tomorrow: who knows.

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