Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Sueño de Amor (SdA) #15. Tuesday March 29, 2016. Yes You Caught My Ex With Her Tongue Down My Throat But She Doesn't Mean A Thing To Me! I Luuurve You!

At a glance

-- Luca's ex is back in town. She puts the kibosh on the PatoLuca pairing on the day of her arrival. Now, this is what I call a self-respecting villana.
-- Erasmo is fired then rehired by Mario. 
-- Kracy and Principal Crazy-Eyes form the League of Extraordinary Crazies.
-- Kracy warns Esperanza to stay away from her Reecherd. Ernesto tries to pump Pato for info about Esperanza and Ricardo. Ernesto wants to ally with Kracy in order to keep the star-crossed lovers apart.
-- Still no valid explanation for Ricardo's 20-year-long disappearing act. Just something about a passer named El Coyote and six people lost in the desert.

A closer look

We begin tonight’s foray into Sueñolandia with Ricardo’s appointment as the new PE teacher of the Musturd School for The Emotionally Stunted, or Colegio Vasconcelos as Osorio prefers to call it.

Mario Kuri, the mascot for kitty-whipped husbands everywhere, fires recently-promoted Erasmo.


The Three Stooges inaugurate their sandwich stand for tortas de chilaquiles or chilortas outside the two schools. Childhood obesity isn’t gonna foster itself. They give away the first chilortas for free, then sell the others at half price. They incur a significant loss and fear that the grand opening will soon be followed by a grand closing.

Luca’s ex-girlfriend, a certain Anastasia who I can only describe as a hybrid of Olive Oyl and Nicki Minaj, surprises him at his office. Apparently she returned to Sueñolandia at Viviana’s behest.

Pedro experiences another sharp pain in the groin during class.

Kristel is angry at her dad for firing Erasmo. She rushes to the building site to console her sexy construction worker and check out his cowboy bath routine. That boy loves to wash his torso in public, God love him. Cleanliness is next to godliness.

Rodrigo is now friends with classmate Homero and his older brother Virgilio (the bullied boy in Episode 1 that Esperanza rescued with a fun game of hoops). With friends like these, a brooding demeanor and a Gringo/Russian accent, the Alegría first-born is sure to be a hit with the bullies.

Ricardo checks the school cameras to find out who left the black orchid on his desk but the archive was erased, most likely by La Sombra.

Anastasia is at the mansion talking with Viviana. She wants to know what’s the deal with Pato. Viviana says that Pato is a nobody, a boring kid, someone of little consequence (un cero a la izquierda); Anastasia is so much better in comparison. Apparently, Anastasia was made to leave Luca, most likely after being paid by Viviana who is now paying her to win him back.

Luca joins Pato at the chilorta stand. Anastasia calls him repeatedly. He tells Pato that he needs to go back to the office to attend some work problems.

Kristel has taken her sniveling Why-Did-You-Fire-Erasmo show on the road. It’s now performing right outside her mother’s office. Principal Crazy-Eyes won’t allow her daughter to mix up (juntarse) with that class of people. Erasmo is a nobody (un don nadie) and the insipid blond (güero desabrido) is the son of Esperanza, her worst enemy.

At the constructora, Murillo, from business (lack of) intelligence shows his boss photos of Kracy. Ernesto is intrigued: he wants to know why Ricardo is courting Esperanza when he already has a wife.

Back at the Magenta School of Arrested Development, otherwise known as Instituto Palacios, Kracy and Principal Crazy-Eyes are forging an alliance to kick Esperanza out of the school. Kracy tells Silvana that Ricardo and Esperanza are old novios who are looking to rekindle their romance. She proposes a pact: If the two crazies join forces, they could prove (probar) that there is something going on between the teaching lovebirds. Esperanza fired = Crazies happy. Win-win.

Esperanza is showing Ricardo the land where she’ll build her dream school. They talk about Kracy shaking (zarandear) Selena. Despite this incident, Ricardo can’t supervise Kracy every time she is around the kids because sometimes he must head out urgently to... the supermarket (he was going to spill the beans about his super secret agent work). Esperanza is onto him, she feels he is lying: “Tell me the truth. Why are you in Mexico?”. He says, rather unconvincingly, that he returned to the old country because he lost everything in LA and because he wants a chance to be with her. “What if it never happens?”, is Esperanza’s follow-up question, instead of the more logical “Where the heck were you for 20 years?”. “It would’ve been worth trying anyway”, replies Ricky Suave with breathy voice, googly eyes, sexy smile, the whole works. He promises that he won’t make the same mistake again, he won’t leave her again. If only he’d give her a valid reason for his disappearance, so I can swoon over this handsome man without fighting the urge to put his handsome head through a wall. Selena and Rodrigo, who have been running around during the entire conversation between their dad and the woman who won’t be his girlfriend, are now interested in hearing about Esperanza’s fee-less school. Ricardo is impressed by her generosity; she hasn’t changed a bit. More googly eyes. More sexy smiles. Seriously, dude, where the heck were you for 20 years?

At the constructora, Anastasia is in Luca’s office. She tells him that she came back from Italy because she misses him. She gets too close and he seems hypnotized. I see where this is going and I’m rubbing my hands in glee.

Justamente, Pato is just a few feet away, in Ernesto’s office. He’s very sweet and fatherly. He wants her to call him Papá. She doesn’t want to. She is a little ticked off (sacada de onda) to be honest. At first, Ernesto seemed so eager to get to know her, then he disappears then he tells Arleth to call her... What's going on? Ernesto gives his angry duckling a certificate that would allow her to fly to Boston whenever she wants so she can see her novio as often as she wants. She appreciates the gesture but declines the gift. Then Ernesto proceeds to  asking questions about Esperanza and Ricardo. Pato gets mad and goes to complain to Luca about their father. She enters the office of her boyfriend/stepbrother and sees him kissing Olive Minaj! Major flip-out! Luca and his caterpillar eyebrows try to explain the situation as best as they can. Pato is sure that her boyfriend/stepbrother still feels something for his ex. Anastasia’s return is stirring his feelings (le movió el tapete). And stirring other things too, I’m sure. Anastasia's return (in that dress, no less!) is reminding Luca that all he’s done for the past week or so is hold hands and exchange bland smooches with a highschooler, who also happens to be his stepsister.

Pedro’s Doc tells him that his pains are due to the increase (incremento) of glucose. Pedro is afraid that this might affect his (inexistent) sex life and hurt his chances with his (inexistent) girlfriend but the doctor reassures him that as long as he sticks to the diet, exercise and medicines prescribed he should be fine.

Mario goes to see Erasmo at his house and rehires him, this time for another job with the constructora of the De la Colina family. (I'm confused. Wasn't Erasmo's previous job precisely with the De la Colinas?)

Outside Esperanza’s residential community, Ricardo asks her to forgive him for abandoning her. Ricardo explains that he nearly died in the desert when he attempted to cross the border. They are interrupted by Esperanza’s neighbor, Amira, then by Selena who needs to go to the loo urgently. Esperanza takes her into her house to use the bathroom. Meanwhile, Kracy returns to an empty apartment so she goes looking for her family at Esperanza’s place. She arrives just as Ricardo and the kids are coming out of Esperanza’s house. Kracy goes crazy and accuses Esperanza of trying to steal her family.

Pato and Luca take their private argument from the constructora’s office corridors to an even more public place, a packed café. Pato demands to know the whole truth. Luca tells her that Anastasia was important to him, they dated for three years and even planned on getting married. Then, one day, he started encountering proof that Anastasia was cheating on him. He never knew who with but they broke up anyway. The end. Pato doesn’t believe that Luca closed his cycle with his ex. She storms out. Tee hee. Broken up again! Thank you, TN Gods! May La Virgen de la Paz keep these two knuckleheads apart until Últimas Semanas! ¡Por favor, Virgencita, háganos este milagro! Please, Virgencita, grant us this miracle!

Kracy is still yelling at Reecherd and Esperanza. Esperanza asks to talk to her alone. She explains that Selena needed the bathroom, that’s all. Kracy warns her to stay away from her kids. Esperanza is happy to do it but, as Kracy well knows being now a spy at Instituto Palacios, they all go to the same school and Esperanza can’t avoid the Alegrías completely. Kracy laughs in her face: “Ha! The spy is someone else but you don’t even have a clue! They’re onto you at Instituto Palacios! They will discover your fling (amorío) and kick you out! Stay away from Reecherd and my family or you’ll regret it for the rest of your life!” Spoken like a true nutcase. Esperanza is saved by the Three Stooges. Kracy leaves.

At the Star Trek control room, Ricardo submits the black orchid and Pamela’s latest drawing to forensic evidence. He informs Triana Fonseca that he summoned Pamela’s parents to a meeting. The father is notoriously elusive but, hopefully, Pamela’s mother will show up and Ricardo can get more information from her.

Esperanza gives marketing suggestions to the Stooges for their chilortas stand: A mascot costume (botarga), branded items like aprons (mandiles), leaflets (volantes) to be distrubed... “Be creative!” is the watchword here, according to Esperanza. Hear that, Osorio?

At night, Esperanza and Pato eat ice-cream in bed and talk about their respective beaus and sentimental problems. At the antro, Erasmo tells Kristel about the new job her dad got him. She sees Pato’s friend, Aranza, in the DJ booth getting too handsy with Pedro and she gets jealous. How much for the elotes, Kris?

The next day, Ricardo joins Esperanza’s spinning class.

At Instituto Palacios, Félix and his musical mustache greet Esperanza and inform her that Ricardo is being watched closely because of his inability to instill discipline in his classroom. One more strike and Maestro Alegría will sashay his squeezable derrière out of the Magenta School of Arrested Development.

At the constructora, Murillo hands his boss the information he requested about Kracy. Ernesto wants him to set up a meeting with her ASAP.

Ricardo’s class is a zoo. Literally. The little beasts tackle him to the ground and Pamela starts throwing feathers on him. All that’s missing is tar and a rail track and they can parade his incompetent behind around school. Esperanza witnesses the madness and attempts to distract Félix before he busts Ricardo. Musical Mustache thinks she is flirting with him. Selena comes out of the classroom and presses the fire alarm.

A quote from the capítulo


"En el desierto, cuando cruzamos la frontera, El Coyote nos abandonó. Éramos un grupo pequeño, éramos seis, y nos perdimos. Y cuando estábamos en medio del desierto..." *
* Ricardo is finally doing his 'splaining. Here is what happened just over 20 years ago, when he decided to cross into the US: "In the desert, when we crossed the border, El Coyote abandoned us. We were a small group, we were 6 people and we got lost. And when we were in the middle of the desert..." And this is when Esperanza's neighbor interrupted, followed by Selena. Drat!
 
Your viewing vocabulario

(these definitions are context-specific, unless otherwise indicated)

un cero a la izquierda = Lit. “ a zero to the left”, meaning: someone of little consequence or importance. A nobody.


juntarse = to hang out with, to mix up with.
un don nadie = a nobody.
güero desabrido = an insipid blond.

probar = to prove.

zarandear = to shake, to push around.

sacado(a) de onda = Lit. “taken out of the wave”, i.e. bummed out.
mover el tapete a alguien = stir someone’s feelings, provoke someone’s interest in the amorous sense.


incremento = an increase.
amorío = fling, crush.


botarga = costume of a clown or mascot.
mandil = apron.
volante = leaflet.


Thank you for the pleasure of your company. Please join us again for the next capítulo. We’ll be saving you a seat!

Labels:


Comments:
Hey Patio Pals! Hope you enjoyed your Easter week-end. I had recapped the wrong episode due to Friday's preemption, so here's a wee bonus recap. Enjoy!

Many thanks to Adriana for covering last night's episode and much appreciation to my fellow recappers and our faithful commenters for making this Patio such a fun place to hang out!

Good night :)
 

Kiko "no canta mal las rancheras" throwing the ball from his wheelchair. He is as good as Ricardo.

Devil with a blue dress on, came to my mind while watching Ana Esthesia being panned from toe to head in the usual way...

So now Pedro's last good testicle is busted too? Is this the end of the Carmona lineage?

The old prayer "our father" give us our daily bread, will now be replaced by
Our Virgin of the peace, give us our daily Erasmo birdbath and deliver us from evil thoughts...

Homero and Virgilio? Are their parents roman poets fans?

I was complaining that Pato looked older than Luca, but this Ana Esthesia is more like in his mother age range...

Education is already free in Mexico. Esperanza is not inventing black thread...

Spot the virgin (is by the horses on the wall)

Thats what happens when you don't knock before entering a room, Pato!

Another "A" name, Amira the mute.

Now let me refuse to buy Ricardo's excuses anymore...

First.
If it is not because he isafter La sombra, Ricardo had never ever been back to Mexico and in consecuence, back to Esperanza. Right? And Ernesto no canta mal las rancheras, because he was not interested in Esperanza uNTIL he saw Ricardo coming back to her. Besides, Ricardo, after the hawk and the ring and all that, doesn't fit the type to cross the border swimming Rio Grande or hiring a "coyote" and risk his life in the desert. A otro perro con ese hueso (I don't believe him at all).

I dont know if Pedro has type 1 or 2 diabetes, but whatever he is taking, is not working, or giving himm worse side effects than the condition itself.
 

Oh, and thanks for the funny remarks!

I forgot to mention that I saw a guy with a rifle inside the FBI HQ pointing it at the agents...
 

Great recap, thanks, Nandiicta. Nicely put: Olive Minaj, kitty-whipped. Yup, "all that's missing is tar . . ." Too funny.

So, Ricardo was lost in the desert for twenty years? Was he wandering? I never understand why characters cannot excuse themselves from the "interrupters" and just finish talking about whatever the topic is. How long is this excuse for his 20 year absence going to take to explain? Getting tedious . . .

Pato got the double whammy with Ernesto wanting to use her to find out about Esperanza and Ricardo and then seeing Luca allowing himself to be "woman handled" and kissed by Anastasia. If it is really over, then why even allow Anastasia to touch him let alone kiss him? Duh! He did not put up any kind of fight. Run, Pato, run.

Weak willed Mario is at least trying to help by getting Erasmo another job.

Can't wait for the Tracy/Silvana alliance to really get revved!

Maybe Esperanza can teach Spanish/Sex Ed/Science/Spinning in Spanish and sign at the same time!!!

Good for Selena pulling the fire alarm and saving her incompetent father from further humiliation by Félix. At least she was thinking.
 

awesome sister Nandicta

"a hybrid of Olive Oyl and Nicki Minaj"

Now Ricky has made me even more mad. By lying about the reason for his return, he's tricking Esperanza into being his soft landing spot and step mommy to his small children. Seeing her was perfect.

Luca is a wimpy punk and like him less than Tricky Ricky
 

Nandicta.......Olive Minaj, I love THE best re-name I have every seen. Your recaps are exquisite, such original funny retellings of the story lines. Keep up the good work. Muchas gracias.

 

I have a problem with each and everyone in this novela, but let me start with Tricky Ricky and then we'll go to Falsie Hopey, Crazy Tracy and the rest, like in Gilligan's island.

Ok. I say Ricardo is not the type of person that cross the border, much less swimming.
If you say Erasmo, maybe. But not Ricardo when he had a job or was studying (don't remember and refuse to go back) to be a teacher.

He said he almost died, and between dying and the Marine training and the FBI (I don't know how long that would take), he got married. I understand that he was very busy crossing, surviving, getting married and training to even think of Esperanza, but then it was thanks to La sombra that he had to go back to Mexico.

Oh! I am back in Mexico, I kinda remember that I loved someone 20 years ago, let's see if she still remembers me. She does! Thanks virgen de la paz!

And then Ernie got hoerny, No! Now after 17 years I want her too! I licked her first!

If the sombra thing has not happened, do you think Ricardo was going to remember Esperanza and even think of coming back to her? I doubt it. And then If Ricardo has not been already after her, Ernesto wouldn't even remember he has a daughter...

Now, Esperanza's problem is that if she is doing all right so far with her three jobs, the two teens and her dreams of becoming the saint of the poor with a free school and all that, why would she need more trouble in her life? These two men, plus whoever comes next now that she is being very popular, are nothing more than trouble. Go back to being alone. Right now is the smarter thing to do.
 

Pablo, Good point about the La Sombra investigation being the catalyst to Ricardo wanting to get back with Esperanza and then Ernesto wanting to know about his daughter.
 

Más vale sola que mal acompañada (better alone than in bad company).

Now I dont even wanna know anything he has to say. No more excuses and lies!
 

Nandicta, pure enjoyment! This was wonderful and your vocabulary was extraordinary.

"Now, this is what I call a self-respecting villana", "They incur a significant loss and fear that the grand opening will soon be followed by a grand closing" and "Kristel has taken her sniveling Why-Did-You-Fire-Erasmo show on the road" were among many favorites.

Anastasia appears to have no personality whatsoever. I guess we are supposed to believe her "hawtness" is a threat. I am not impressed.

Mario keeps trying to "right" the "wrongs" he commits due to his deranged wife's insistence. I think Mario and Kristel need to move out. Immediately.

Still enjoying Espe and her children (and the other children) more than any of the romances. Rick is going to have to ratchet it up a notch for me to be more interested!

Diana
 

Diana, I so agree that Mario and Kristel need to move out and get their own place ASAP. Why should Kristel even have to find a job to be able to afford to move out when her father can afford to help her with rent? Especially since he is responsible in a large part for her living at home becoming impossible because he won't confront his wifey.
 

Ugh, again with the bottom-to-top pan. Are we supposed to think she's hot? The actress may very well be pretty underneath all that mess, but how would you know? The styling was tacky, the hair looks like a bad wig, and her face was buried under troweled-on spackle and paint.

However, your top-to-bottom pan of the episode is nothing but delight, Nandicta. Olive Minaj is a perfect description of our new Anastacky. A-nasty-sia? I'll work on it.

Hey, maybe she's La Sombra! Same costuming skill level!

Since when is the architect in charge of hiring and firing bricklayers? Shouldn't he be busy doing, like, the architecting? What in the hell does anyone else in Ernesto's company do?

Ricardo is being a disappointment. Step it up, Tricky Ricky! Tell us why you forgot to call for two decades! Follow Pamela home or something and do some actual spying instead of analyzing kiddie pictures in the Lex Luthor Lab.
 

Oh and also, Reecherd, if you're going to crash someone's spinning class, show up on time!
 

Nandicta, this was a great read, thank you for always putting such a funny spin on things.
Luca was already annoying but at least he had true love (eye roll ) in his corner. Now we find out he has an ex? No bueno.

How many more times will Ric "almost" say wath happened to him? New drinking game?
 

An ex is one thing. An ex who's mommy's puppet and who afflicts him with patanbesoparalysis is another. Go away, Luca. Pato needs to remember she has better things to do.
 

This Ric ''almost'' saying reminds me a lot of the 1,001 nights. He will probably go on and on almost saying it and never will. For me, the longest it takes, the worse it gets, and Esperanza shouldn't be taking him back this easy, Cristián or no Cristián. BTW, Cristián needs to get off of the chicken!!


 

I'd break up with Luca too and flee to Europe if he came to bed in superhero pj's
 

Especially since the "bed" would be a hammock way up in the top of a giant tree and he'd be expecting smoochies all night for "saving" you from plummeting to your death.
 

I think Luca either has a pioneer wagon or bat-mobile bed
 

You guys make me laugh!
 

You guys are a hoot and a half! Thanks a bunch for taking the time to swing by! I'm sorry I couldn't hang out. Today was manic, then I had to scramble over the last episodes of EHDLS because I'm recapping tonight. Cheers for the laughs, Patio Pals! ¡Ustedes son lo máximo!
 

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