Caray, Caray!

Let us begin this episode with those two crazy kids Dider & Joselyn. Dider the "Latin Dance Machine", with the oddly Teutonic name, is seriously puttin the ole squeeze on Joselyn down at the House of Fashion. Either pony up mucho dinero or he'll show the "Dancing with the Whores"...ooppsss typo "Dancing with the Stars", camera zooms in for the close up Horizontal Mambo, video to Gabe. Grrrwwwwwllllllll.....There is some sexually charged pushing & shoving & grrrrwwwlllling at this point.
Okay she promises she'll come up with money. I can't believe Dider the Dance Machine Dude fell for that, did he not hear the grrrrrwwwwwlllllll?

Our two Star-Crossed lovers Paulina and Juan Cristobel:
Well it must be take an annoying kid to work day, cause Pauli has brought "Tiny Tim" down to the shop (strangely enough she isn't toiling away...wearing gloves with the fingers cut out...ooops sorry that is the other "Tiny Tim", oh well God Bless Us Everyone); anyway she introduces him to JC.

JC gets the thought bubble, "Hmm my lil hermano, well you can't choose your family". Lui is all excited to meet JC & calls him "Primo" (spanish for first cousin...it's used like "Cuz" is here). I believe, Lui is all excited in anticipation of that tried and true Mexican tradition of yelling "Primo" across crowded cantinas, only to have six hundred people turn around as everyone is drinking with their Primos. (My husband's name actually is Primo, so I know of what I speak).

Pauli & Lui get ready to go get some muy rico comida...I'm thinking pudding cups cause I can't imagine that kid eating solid food or maybe some nine-lives, cause he is kinda mewwwwing again, squealing that he is sooooo excited to have a "Primo". Anyway he invites JC to go along and Pauli & JC exchange one of those "Kids, what can you do" looks, thus relieving the tension.

Well what exactly are our friends in the barrio up too? It's an incredibly wholesome Naco Futbol (that's Soccer to you) rally, with everyone cheering the local team on ... which of course Leo happens to be the leader of. I recognize some of the women who are trying out as cheerleaders, they were a few years ahead of me at school ... trust me that is saying something ... that they even remember what a pom-pom is much less how to twirl one.

JC decides to join Pauli & Lui for dinner back at the Big House ... Gabe greats them at the door and is very cordial to JC ... but Gabe is basically one of those always clueless, yet faultlessly polite individuals ... Gawd no wonder Demian hates him.

Tiberio after losing out on French Kissing his own mother ... is at a loss for something to do ... so he chides Rogelio over the two hot babes Rogelio was out with the nite before. Rogelio is like "So What", Tiberio is all like, "Your Dad would be mad"....yeah this seemed kinda lame to me too. Tiberio wants to play Billards against Rogelio, but I'm not certain what the stakes are. ... I know it is not for Diana ... so maybe it is for Gabe.

Tiberio now calls slutty lil beast Karen, who squeals and twists with delite at the thought of dinner with Tiberio. He says, "don't be late & wear your plaid skirt knee hi's." Okay I just made the skirt & knee hi's part up, but I'm sure he would have approved.

Karen comes in and sees the warm family moment of JC mixing it up with the Gabe side of the family. The idea of dinner with Tiberio no longer seems so appealing. She calls Tiberio, who is at what I assume is supposed to be a swanky Italian eatery (there is a rather tacky paint by number Leaning Tower of Pisa painting on the wall). She tells him dinner is off, JC is at the Big House. I almost felt sorry for Ti, stood up.

Over at the other Big House....the dark evil Big House.... Demian comes home. He is informed JC will not be joining them for dinner. Demian takes advantage of this to try & get busy with Regina. "Hey let's put the past behind us, lets start over." "Too little Too late" is her reply. I feel bad for Demian, Regina has been sitting around for twenty-five years hopin for the guy with two good legs. Geez, yeah I got over the cute guy that sat behind me in Freshman English like 30 years ago. Gabe is like 2 wives & a schoolteacher plus three kids, beyond Regina. She needs to realize "Gabe just wasn't that into her".

This alienation of affection causes Demian to vow that he will make Gabe suffer.
Oh yes, he has some work for the Barrio Boy "Coyote"

Meanwhile back at the Good Big House:
Everyone is breaking bread together and getting along quite well. Here comes Joselyn, (I just noticed they have a rather large "St. Michael" statue on the table in the living room; this makes me wonder if Demian has a big "Beezelbub" statue in his living room). Joselyn sneaks in to Gabes office, looking for something, she finds a gun. Whoa Mama that is a big one ... (my husband said like a .380, thank god, she carries a big purse, she puts into her purse right next to her tube of "Big Glossy Lip-Plumper". Grwwwwwwllllll.

Joselyn then back tracks, slams the door, "Hola, Familia, Mami is home."
Joselyn is like WTF, when she sees JC, but oh well she has bigger fish to fry. Candelaria comes in to the dining room and suggests that Lui go with MA to the big neighborhood fiesta. Joselyn says no that those kind of things are not for Lui (I don't know if she meant cause he is crippled or a class thing or if she realizes ... everyone hates him and a mob of peasants will storm the castle and kill him).

Anyway at this point ... Dider calls (he is lounging around his tropical apartment, while sporting a wife-beater tee ... oh Dider, I feel I barely knew ye). In a sub coded message Joselyn tells him she will indeed give him the money. She abruptly leaves the table, Gabe has that look of confusion on his face, but I don't know if it is over Joselyn or if he just wonders one cube or two for the coffee. NowGabe is smilin at MA cause it is two thumbs up with Lui hittin the fiesta.

****I forgot at some point Lui mewwws out that he'd really like to meet his Tio Demian; I was like yes!!!!!! Go to the Dark Side...I am your Father....Luke....wait make that Lui****

Anyway no one really answers his query...it was just a pregnant pause & people looking up at the ceiling ... Awkward.

The Naco Futbol game happens and it is kinda sad, many players look to be old enough to have played in the orginal Greek Olympics. On the side line the local "Hells Angels" appear and kind of ride their bikes all around the field....I am way confused at this point cause it looks like there is gonna be a serious rumble....1969 "The Stones Concert"...

No need to worry, they just line up on the side and watch.
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
Yes, our Dr. Leo scores a goal.....Yayyyyyyyyy

Oh no, there has been a altercation between Leo and a player from the opposing side... He's down, his right leg is injured, his knee is twisted. Pushing and shoving between the teams breaks out ... the drug crazed bikers take to the field (they did take to the field, but I just added the drug-crazed part for effect) ... Leo, with a stiff upper lip calms everyone down.

The game continues and Leo, with a giant wrap around his leg, cheers his teammates on to victory. Everyone is nice to each other, but the bikers come up and taunt the losing team... I have no idea why. One of the bikers blows a kiss at one of the over-the-hill cheerleaders. Oh good another plot-point, cause this Telenovela seems to be lacking in them.

Oh I forgot, I got throw this in, Joselyn did ask Miriam for help, but of course Miriam told her she was on her own. Otilia also came and visited Miriam, sorry I'm not sure what was said, I got a phone call, but whatever it was, there was some snarking going on. I saw Ingrid come in to Miriam's office and I was glad to see Miriam hadn't beaten her to death, but she did continue to berate her.

Now it is the next day and we are seeing the Big Fiesta, which is for St. Francis of Assisi "Patron Saint of Animals and the Environment". Good Times, Good Times ... in a particularly "Dickens Moment", Leo is carrying Lui on his back, with MA right at this side. Hey that wrenched knee got better really fast cause that kid is no lite weight.

It is now night at the Fiesta and Lui is playing rock/scissors/paper with a kid named David, he and David, with MA permission go off to get balloon animals from a mime...

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, never trust a mime

David gets this really rockin bunny rabbit and Lui wants a dragon, David runs back to show MA his bunny and the mime grabs Lui hand. Next we are lookin thru milling people and OH NO, I warned them about the mime ... Lui is gone. Panic ensues, Leo quickly organizes a Naco Search Party.

Meanwhile, Gabe is having a drink with Nic, they discuss what else ... MA, Gabe asks Nic if he is interested in MA, Si she is muy good lookin and nice too. Gabe then proceeds to lay it on pretty thick with you are my only friend and I am living without love....I too think MA is hot.

The Mime and the kid arrive at some crappy dwelling with bad furniture and two rooms, the Mime shoves the kid into the back bedroom and tells Lui to shut-up. Well we all know how well that works. Mewwwwwwww. The Mime locks him in there. I hope for the Mime's sake that is a sound proof room. The Mime wipes off his make-up OMG it's Coyote.

Back to the Fiesta, oh No the kid can't be found....by this point the two local priests are involved............
(You don't know how hard it is for me....I so wanta to go there, but due to the sensitive nature of some jokes...I won't).

MA is now really scared, no kidding you lost the kid ... not good for a resume.
They decide to call the authorities & Gabe.

Coyote calls Demian with a "The package is in the Locker" message and Demian laughes his really EVIL, yet crazy HAWT laugh. Lui is sobbing "Help me" "Help me" "Papacito"

JC shows up at the Big House with the lame excuse he wants to dicuss work. Well of course this leads to the big personal discussion and Paulina says she thinks JC, wants Slutty Karen.

Joselyn arrives at Dider, tropical wonderland, this guy is such a tool. He has made them tropical drinks with little umbrellas in them and he turns on his CD player and now he is just "Dancin in Dark", you can tell he thinks he is all that. Joselyn pulls out her .380 and Dider's lil feets stop tappin. You can see his thought bubble, "Crap I'll never get to the Latin Grammys".

Will Dider commit suicide by Joseyln?
Will Gabe ever be able to get a clue?
Will Leo notice Coyote buying large quanties of "Fancy Feast"?

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