Caray, Caray!

Because it's Oscars weekend, and everybody's talking about who's wearing what, I'm adding my own fashion commentary to this recap. I'll warn you, though, that it's not a topic I get excited about like those Hollywood people.

Fern and Omar

Fern (okay outfit, not as good as yesterday's), Omar (okay outfit), Aldo (okay outfit), Guillermo (henceforth Gil 'cuz I'm lazy; nice outfit), and some other people (assorted outfits) are having their meeting about gastronomical tourism. Fern keeps interrupting to blather at length about nothing. It is as if he's trying to control the meeting, except he's not providing any direction. Gil then cuts him off politely so that Aldo can long-windedly share his own esoteric thoughts on the Flavor of Life.

To stave off boredom, Omar flirts with the redhead next to him. "I'm talking, Omar" Aldo scolds him and says more about "Sabor de Vida." Fern starts mocking "sabor de vida, flavor of life."

This is giving me flashbacks to kindergarten, which is strange because I didn't go to kindergarten.

Gil pointedly ignores Fern and mentions that there's also the "Flavor of Life" book, the movie, the sitcom, the Broadway show, plus the toothpaste, Underoos, breakfast cereal, coffee mug, etc. (Okay, he only mentions the book, but you know it's just a matter of time before there's a Franklin Mint commemorative chess set too.) Fern then makes fun of the book about quesadillas, sopes, garnachas, and panichos.

Aldo good-naturedly says he's glad they're having fun with the food names, but we can see his jovial facade beginning to crack. He talks about the book, Fern continues to mock, and finally Aldo rolls his eyes and complains.

Hoping to break this strange tension that he doesn't understand, Gil changes the subject to something less volatile: Aldo's brilliant friend Lety Padilla, who gave their project a new dimension. Fern recovers from his shock and he and Aldo argue about Lety. Fern says he's here as Lety's representative, so Aldo shouldn't be talking about her. Aldo says Fern wasn't there when Aldo and Lety came up with these ideas. Omar clumsily tries to smooth things over, but only succeeds in annoying the redhead. Aldo says there's going to be a big expo... and then he leans across the table to tell Fern that was Lety's idea, too.

Fern tries to wrap up the meeting by telling the restaurant people that Omar will negotiate with each of them. Gil reminds Fern that the amount has already been decided. Fern says Aldo already told him about that. "A little bird told me," he says snidely.

After the meeting, Omar and Fern go outside to talk. Omar criticizes Fern's behavior, trying to ruin the meeting with juvenile antics. Back in the meeting room, Aldo complains to Gil about Fern's behavior as well. :-) Gil says all he cares about is that the project goes well. Gil wants to meet with Lety to talk things over.

Outside, Fern says he wants to get Aldo to pull out of the project. They'll do it all themselves. All the info they need is in Aldo's book. Omar is aghast at this dumb idea.

Lety and the cuartel

Lety (conservatively cut skirted suit in a shade of coral that was popular around 1990) asks the cuartel (all wearing nicer things than usual, IMO) where they heard all this stuff they've been gossiping about. They claim they got it from someone in Editing, but Lety doesn't believe them. Finally she gives up and tells them to forget about it and go back to work. "But you're not the friends I used to have," she says, disappointed. She gives them a sad lecture and concludes, "do me a favor - don't blab about this, because you don't know what you're talking about." She leaves the stunned cuartel in the boardroom and closes the door behind her.

The ladies confer, ashamed of themselves and more confused than ever. They yell for Lety, who has simply been standing on the other side of the door. She rejoins them, glad they've decided to trust her. They send Sara to reluctantly fetch the evidence and they explain that they found it among Omar's things that they were told to move. "You read The Letter?" Lety asks, stunned. She dismisses it as Omar's bad joke, but asks where they got the idea that the wedding was cancelled because of her. Lola explains that they had noticed a lot of strange things, and The Letter and the balance sheet helped them put it all together.

Lety is upset to realize that they saw the balance sheet too. Lola observes that Conceptos owed US$45 million to Filmo-Imagen - Lety's old boyfriend's company - and asks if there's a connection between that, and Lety being president of Conceptos now. They also want to know if Lety was cheating on Tomas with Fern. Lety denies this.

Irma is shocked and scandalized by this entire conversation and wants it to end. :-) Sara asks about the red bag. Lety confirms that it's the bag mentioned in The Letter. Martha remembers how, shortly after the Red Bag Caper, Lety cried and cried and cried. "They used you," Lola guesses.

Lety finally agrees to tell them everything, but tells them they have to keep it to themselves. She says that on the day of the Big Meeting, she decided that she couldn't lie to the Mendi-roels any more. She showed them the real balance sheet, but she didn't intend to reveal the romance to anyone. That was Marcia's doing.

Irma remembers Marcia demanding to see the contents of Lety's trash bags. Lety confirms that the bag was full of the gifts and cards from Fernando, as well as The Letter. Martha mentions that Fern had the bag yesterday. Lety says yes, but he went and threw it in the trash.

The cuartel is very relieved to know the whole story. That seems to be the end of it, until Irma protests, "but you knew Don Fernando was engaged!" PM says he was practically a married man. They ask Lety if she thinks he loved her. She thinks not, but says she's pretty sure he didn't love Marcia either. The cuartel blows off some steam complaining about what a dirtbag Fernando is.

Saimon dances in with a BIG basket of flowers. (Over at the restaurant association, Aldo takes a call from someone confirming that the flowers have been delivered. He remembers his conversation with Carolina about not overwhelming Lety with gifts, but he wants to make up for losing the pearl... not that Lety ever knew about that pearl in the first place...) They all want to know who it's from, but they can't find a card. Saimon doesn't know who sent it either. He says he has a test at his computer class that night and dances out.

PM wonders if the flowers are from Fern. Lety tells them all it's time to go back to work, and asks them not to repeat a word of what she said. The cuartel leaves the boardroom and immediately heads towards the restroom. Observing from a discreet distance, Lety tells nosy Alicia: "The bathroom. I knew it!" They have already started gossiping again when Lety bursts in and cries, "I caught you!"

They seem to pretty much ignore her and continue clucking about everything. She begs them to please forget about it and stop talking about it - at least within Conceptos.

Juana says she's still worried about Tomas. Does he know about the stuff with Fernando? Lety reveals that Tomas was never her boyfriend. They are impactadas. She says they all knew she was in love with someone, and she didn't want them to think it was Fernando, so she told them it was Tomas.

Juana reminds them of when she told Lety's fortune with seashells (this was before I started watching) that she was going to meet a man and both their lives would change. Lety says sure, her life has changed 180 degrees, but his is still the same. Sara points out that Fern's life has changed too - he lost the presidency. Lety says he'll get it back, marry Marcia, and then it'll all keep going. (I'm thinking the prediction could just as easily have referred to Aldo!)

She asks them again to keep her secret, and if they must talk about it, please do it away from here. She urges them to get back to work, but Juana has one last question: is she still in love with Fern? Lety asks YET AGAIN to drop the subject. PM is curious about how Lety recovered from all of this after the Big Meeting. Martha asks where she went, who she met, etc. Lety promises to tell them eventually, but not now, must work. They want to do another seashell reading - maybe on their lunch hour. Lety says no, she's still afraid, but she did meet a psychic, and she shows them the blue medallion he gave her. She says he told her "many interesting things." (True, but I'm not sure if he ever told her anything useful.)

Strange interlude

Walking through the park in a disco leisure suit that actually looks pretty good on him, Psychic Guy tells the camera, "I sense that I'm going to run into Leticia."

Lobby loiterers

While the cuartel is meeting with Lety, Alicia (all red satin, and tighter than ever) sits at PM's desk. The phone rings and she answers "Yeah? Nope, haven't seen her, call back later" and hangs up. She answers more politely next time, but again tells the person to call back later.

Sara passes through and they trade token insults; for the sake of variety, Alicia calls Sara both a giraffe and a deformed ostrich.

For some reason, she thinks the next call is from Aldo and answers, "Aldo, mi amor!" But it's Tomas (Inspector Gadget costume), who is excited to be addressed thusly. "Oh, what do you want?" Tomas tries to lure her into his office with the promise of "something very interesting," but Alicia doesn't take the bait.

Tomas asks himself how he can get Alicia to check out the new Tomas. He wants to do it in private. He hides the many photos of Alicia, muttering to himself, "look out, Aldo!"

In the lobby, Alicia tries (in her own incompetent way) to console Luigi (weird black getup festooned with leftover Christmas tree garland) about his problems with Ruli. Tomas spies while Alicia tells Luigi, who is powdering his face, that he'll be an old maid while she'll have been married twice. (Over my dead body, Tomas thinks to himself.) She encourages Luigi to cry, while Tomas plans his grand entrance.

Later, Marcia (MUCH better outfit today) teases Alicia about arriving early to work. Is it a miracle? Alicia says no, it's a heroic deed, being with all the people of her own class. Amused, Marcia asks if she's referring to people from school. Alicia says no, she means workers, salesmen, etc. that ride the bus. She whines about the usual - getting up early and not having breakfast. She fell asleep on the bus and if some idiot hadn't nudged her awake, she would have missed her stop. And then maybe she would have woken up in Veracruz or Oaxaca or who knows where. She can't take it any more.

Marcia urges Alicia to take it up with Lety, and tell her she got there early. Alicia said Lety already knows, she's already seen her today - while she was showing off her new car to the cuartel.

Marcia is intrigued to hear about this new car, but asks where the cuartel is. Alicia tells them they're in their meeting room - the bathroom. Just like always. Marcia is disgusted.

Meanwhile, in the mens' restroom, Saimon (okay suit) finds Tomas putting drops in his eyes. Saimon asks if he can help, but Tomas hurriedly excuses himself and stumbles around the bathroom, unable to find his way out. Saimon tells him not to cry. Tomas denies crying and says he has something in his eye. Saimon doesn't believe him, and asks if he's having trouble with his girlfriend Lety. He tries to get Tomas to cry on his shoulder. Tomas finally makes it to the door, and Saimon mutters about cheating girlfriends who make men cry.

Tomas passes Alicia's desk again. Alicia is cooing at her "engagement photo" again, and Marcia says she wants to check in with Ricky Armstrong (hey, maybe he'd like to date Marcia? why not?), but Alicia wants to talk about last night. So does Marcia - because Alicia called her at midnight, and then she couldn't sleep because Fern went out "for a walk" and didn't come back. Alicia says she doesn't want to hear Marcia's sob stories - she's not in the mood because she's feeling very content. Marcia mockingly says oh, right - you're getting married to Aldo. Alicia is annoyed that Marcia doesn't believe her. Marcia says fine, go ahead and tell me, what did he say to you?

Alicia: He told me that the present was very important, because we were together, and later he told me that we are soulmates and we will be together forever, into infinity, for eternity.

Marcia: And how was the marriage proposal?

A: Aldo is very lofty, very gifted - he doesn't say things directly like you or I; no, he's like, like, like a poet. He says what he wants, but with pretty words - and very complicated, I confess.

M: Could it be that you misunderstood him?

A: What? How can you think that? No, I understood him perfectly and clearly! He wants to spend his life completely with me.

M: It seems fishy to me that a guy like Aldo would get engaged to someone he just met that day.

Alicia says it was a simple case of love at first sight. As if to prove her point, she shows Marcia the photo, and it is only at this exact moment that I realize something: when she looks at this photo, she's not looking at Aldo, whose frightened eyes say it all. No, she's looking at herself - all happy and clueless - and reliving that magical moment in her own secret parallel universe where she's irresistible and everyone likes her.

Fern and Omar

Fern and Omar get back to the office. Fern has his phone in his hand and isn't able to compete for the big chair. He asks Luigi if he has Aldo's book - "Flavor of Cuachiflasis [not in my dictionary!!] or Flavor of Life or something about sopes and garnachas." No, and he hasn't read it either. Fern is annoyed about this "ridiculous" book. Omar says how do you know if it's ridiculous if you haven't read it? Fern says, "It's about sopes and garnachas and quesadillas, that's why! And it was written by the ridiculous Aldo Domenza-EEN, don't ask dumb questions, Omar!"

Fern's theory is that if they have Aldo's book, they won't need the actual flesh-and-blood Aldo. Omar wisely decides not to challenge Fern's fragile grip on logic, and instead taunts him with a stuffed giraffe from the Big Bag o' Lies. (This was the giraffe that I once called a "girama" because I couldn't tell from a distance whether it was a giraffe or a llama.) Fern snatches it away from Omar and tells him not to touch it. Omar worries that someone will catch them with this stuff, but Fern advises him that no one needs to know about it and they can keep it all hidden. (Fern is waving the giraffe around - not a great way to hide things.) Fern reminds him that Omar's the one who bought all these things and please hide them nicely.

Omar agrees to do so, but strangles the giraffe and makes a noise. "Don't squeeze it," Fern says sternly. "Why not?" Omar says defensively as he puts it back in the bag. "It brings back good memories."

I'm not sure if I want to know about those.

The New Tomas

Tomas goes back to his office and complains about how "these things" make his eyes water. There is a pile of used facial tissues all over his desk. He blows his nose and says firmly, "It's now or never. Here I come, Alicia Ferreira!"

At waist-height, we see the sunglasses hit the desk, followed by the hat. Then we see Tomas's denim-clad legs approach the door.

Alicia is still smooching the Aldo photo alone at her desk (I wonder whose face she's kissing - Aldo's or hers?) and murmuring sweet nothings to it.

Suddenly, we're looking through the Tomas-Cam. Alicia's arms sag in disbelief and she drops the photo on her desk. Her jaw falls the short distance to her, uh, jaw-cushions as she slowly rises from her desk. Behind her, Aldo gets off the elevator, but she is too fascinated by the vision in front of her to notice.

The camera switches back to Tomas's feet in black loafers... then up to his legs in jeans... then we see a forest green blazer (velvet? tweed? corduroy? I can't tell). His hands seem to be resting over a belt that we can't see because it's covered by the white-striped hem of a grey turtleneck sweater. Panning up some more, there's - ugh - some necklace with a charm... and then...

The Golden Circle of Tomorrow. Damn!

Fortunately, it's a double-feature tonight, so tomorrow is today and now we see the face.

I'll confess now that I saw this on YouTube a few months ago. I heard Tomas was getting a makeover, and I just had to see. I'm sorry I did. I've been having nightmares about it ever since. Remember that sleep study I had to do? This is why. This is what's been keeping me awake.

Not really. Because on YouTube his face was only a couple of centimeters tall. But now on my little 15" TV, his face is the size of a Frisbee. A big BLOND blow-dried Frisbee, blinking fast enough to make up the difference for Marcia's staring over the last, what's it been now, 10 months? Holy mackerel, this show has been on for 10 months. It doesn't seem that long to me, but maybe that's because I've only been watching 7 months.

Anyway, he's blinking a mile a minute, trying to keep his new blue contact lenses from popping out of his eyes. And he's grinning in a very weird way, showing off a luminescent Ultra-Brite smile.

Aldo is trying to tell Alicia that he wants to talk to her about "what happened last night," but Alicia can't hear him. She is laughing too loudly to hear anything. (Perhaps the "natural blonde" isn't aware of the irony.)

Crushed, Tomas's smile droops. He stops blinking and begins to cry. Aldo is not amused by Alicia's peals of laughter. "Tomas, what have you done?" he asks. "Isn't it obvious?" Alicia crows. "That dummy wants to look like you." She tells Tomas he'd have to go back to birth for that. In fact, even that wouldn't be enough. "There are some things that just can't be fixed," she says.

Tomas puts the trenchcoat over his head. Aldo tells Alicia that laughter lifts the soul, but not when it's caused by someone else's pain. "Please, Alicia," he says. She stops, although I'm not sure she understands why.

Aldo leads Tomas to the restroom (Tomas can't see, with the trenchcoat over his head and his contacts killing him). He has to hurry, because Alicia looks like she's going to start laughing again.

Safely in the restroom, Aldo tells Tomas (who is scolding himself for his stupidity) to get "those things" out of his eyes, but Tomas thinks he's already lost them because he can't see. Aldo says they look okay. Fumbling, Tomas puts his glasses on. He tells Aldo that he's the ugliest of the ugly on the planet. He never dreamed he could be with a woman like Alicia, but then, he never thought he'd be a VP of finance worthy of a monkey-cage either. Aldo says he is worthy of more than a monkey-cage.

Tomas notices that this is the second time Aldo has rescued him. Aldo admits that he doesn't like Ariel's attitude, and Alicia lacks the sensitivity to understand a person like Tomas - loyal, shy, intelligent. Tomas says those are the things that people value in someone, and that's what he's always told Lety, but he's never told it to himself. It's easy to say it, but not to do it.

Inspecting Tomas's dye job, Aldo says something like there are things that CAN change, and then there are things that SHOULD change. They laugh (Tomas kinda snorts). Tomas asks what he should do about his hair. Aldo recommends shampoo and soap. Tomas asks what kind Aldo uses. Aldo replies, "15." (Dunno what this is.) Aldo offers to get Tomas some shampoo (Luigi keeps some around). As he approaches the door, Tomas hurriedly covers his head. Aldo offers to put up a sign on the door telling people to keep out!

Tomas goes to the mirror and squeamishly prepares to take his contacts out.

Very soon afterwards, Aldo is toweling Tomas's hair dry. Tomas is afraid to look as Aldo slowly pulls the towel back. The color is still, y'know, not very Tomas, but at least none of his hair has fallen out. Tomas is depressed and Aldo says it'll take a while for his regular color to grow back.

Tomas acknowledges that Aldo has been really nice to him several times. "Friends?" he says, offering his hand. Aldo takes it and kisses it. (Just kidding. He shakes it. But just think how much funnier it would have been if Luigi had walked in on Aldo washing Tomas's hair and kissing his hand. No?)

Tomas combs his hair into his usual Woody Woodpecker crest. Aldo is telling him that his favorite thing to prepare is shellfish, or any other kind of seafood. (Oysters and snails... oysters and snails...) Tomas says they make a great team - Aldo likes to cook, and Tomas likes to eat.

Tomas sits on the bench with Aldo and asks what Aldo thinks of Lety. Aldo says this is the greatest thing they have in common, because Lety is important to both of them. Tomas wants to know how important. "More than you can imagine, Tomas." Tomas says they both know how great she is - marvelous, poised, intelligent, kind, shy, loyal... Aldo interrupts, she is lovely. Tomas says, "seriously, she's a good friend..." Aldo says "Tomas, Leticia is very beautiful."

Tomas says "Yeah? OK, if that's how she looks to you, then I agree." He asks if Aldo thinks someone could really be in love with her. Aldo suddenly wants to postpone the rest of this conversation until later. Tomas gets up for his trenchcoat, and I notice that he's wearing the sweater but not the jacket, and suddenly I realize that he looks so much better with a jacket. He nervously prepares to come out of the bathroom and be seen with his new look. He thanks Aldo again for his help.

Aldo leaves, and Tomas tells himself, "what a guy. He'd be ideal for Lety." He realizes that this would be killing two birds with one stone - it'd make Lety forget about Fern, and then he could have Alicia all to himself!

In the Upside-Down Monster Ladyparts Seashell Grotto & Zen Garden

Lety is STILL talking to the cuartel. (Do they EVER give it a rest??) She tells them to call their bosses for a meeting. Lola says she needs to go to the judge. Lety asks how the divorce is going. Lola says El Cheque's going after the house and she doesn't think she's going to get any of the money. Lety tries to calm her down and says it'll all turn out fine. (I'm sure that's a great comfort to Lola considering that Lety has no legal expertise at all.) She tells Lola of course she can go see the judge, no problem (unlike Lopez who probably would have tried to fire Lola just for asking).

The cuartel files out and Lety notices that something is amiss with the painting on her wall. She wonders if it's ghosts. (No, Lety - the painting inverted ITSELF because it was ANGRY! It demands a daily tribute! It wants LITTLE STUFFED ANIMALS!!!)

In the boardroom

Carolina, wearing a MUCH better outfit, finds Lety looking at the huge basket of flowers. She admires them and asks who they're from. Lety says she's sure they came from Aldo. (The door cracks open; Fern begins to peep.) Caro finds the card - a task that eluded the entire cuartel. It reads, "I lost a pearl that I had for you, but in exchange, I ordered these flowers." Lety doesn't understand; Caro encourages her to ask "him." (Fern is incensed.) Lety says she's not going to ask "him" about the pearl, but she loves the flowers.

Enraged, Fern enters the room and slams a sheaf of papers against the door. They look at him, and he pretends that he is swatting a fly. He babbles stupidly for a while, says he needs to go for Omar, lines up all the chairs carefully, swats another imaginary fly for good measure, and excuses himself.

Caro tells Lety to stop worrying about Fern and whether or not he heard her read the card. It'd be better to focus on Aldo getting them for her, right? Lety says he likes her a lot, and she likes him too. Caro wants to know what kind of liking this is - the liking of friends, of siblings... Lety gets irritable and says Caro sounds like her mother. "Excuuuse me?" Caro asks. Lety says that Mom and Caro are both seeing this from the outside. On the inside, she thinks he's a great friend, but he's never suggested anything more. (Perhaps because someone interrupts or she runs away every time he tries?) Caro says that if that's Lety's perception, then it's "valid."

Lety moves the flowers into her office so that no one will ask about them during the meeting. While she's out of the room, Caro muses aloud that poor Lety can't even conceive of the love that Aldo has for her.

More lobby loopiness

It appears that the cuartel is lollygagging in the restroom again. (Where do they go when they have to pee?) Alicia answers PM's phone and tells Guillermo - the caller - that Lety's secretary isn't around at the moment, she can't take a message, and he'll have to call back later. Like maybe a year from now.

(What does it take to get a person fired around here?)

The cuartel comes out of the restroom just in time for PM to catch the end of this conversation. She complains, Alicia says she doesn't have time to talk to all of PM's little friends. Saimon happens by and complains about PM's little friends too and leaves.

Sara demands that Alicia hand over all of Lety's messages. Alicia says, "you know where you can find those messages? In your TOMB! They'll need an oil drill to bury you." Sara tells Alicia to tell her boss that there's a meeting right now. Alicia doesn't want to do it. Sara warns that if Marcia doesn't show up, they'll have to put flowers on Alicia's tomb. They laugh and make ghost noises at Alicia. Martha says in place of flowers, they'll bring the bills from her cell phone, her jewels, and her creditors. Lola adds that it will be a well-visited tomb... for the lawyers! PM jokes that she'll have a nice headstone... until it gets repossessed!

Alicia says that when they die, they won't go to go to hell, nor heaven, nor purgatory, no, they'll just stay here, haunting people as witches. And they'll die soon! Very soon! Of envy, because Aldo asked her to marry him!

They scoff at her, and Fern, who's been on the phone in the lobby all this time, yells that the employees at Conceptos are making a scene. Alicia continues to say that they won't be invited to her wedding. They ask what flavor of sorbet she's going to have.

Martha voices doubt that a man like Aldo wants to marry Alicia. She thinks he's more Luigi's type. Alicia leaves them to their gossip. Irma says she doesn't like to gossip about her boss, but in this case she thinks it's more likely that Aldo's with Luigi. Luigi's having a tiff with Ruli... about jealousy over Aldo.

Just then, they catch sight of Tomas sneaking from the restroom to his office. He hears them laughing and tries to hide... which only makes him look sillier. He gives up and says they're probably wondering about his hair. He says he ran out of shampoo this morning, and he was half-asleep, and he accidentally used something of his mother's. Martha is skeptical. Lola tells him about the meeting and says she has to go see the judge. Tomas says that's okay, but don't stay too late - they've got lots of work to do!

And of course, he's right. Especially since no one has done a lick of work today yet. (The Three Stooges Shemp Edition making a scene at a meeting does not count as work.)

As Tomas goes back to his office, Irma points out that he has one eye blue, and the other eye "a different color." Juana asks if they weren't already like that. Martha thinks he was born that way.

Redrum... redrum... redrum...

Morose, Fern joins Omar in a red-walled area of Omar's office that I don't think I've ever noticed before. Omar asks what's wrong. Fern says he has good news and bad news. Omar wants the good news first. Fern says Aldo is going to marry Alicia. Omar asks, marry (casar) or hunt (cazar)? Har. He says, in that case, Aldo's even dumber than they thought.

Omar asks for the bad news. Fern can barely bring himself to say it: Lety has an admirer! Omar tells Fern to put his feet up on the couch and relax. Omar pulls up a chair, and they look like a stereotypical TV psychiatrist and patient. Omar analyzes the situation: if Aldo is marrying Alicia, it'd be quite the coincidence if he has the same habits as Fern: having a formal girlfriend as well as a lover at the same company, in the same place and with the same people... they joke about a song that has these lyrics.

Fern thinks that her admirer isn't Aldo, but someone else. He says he saw Lety in the boardroom showing off some flowers to Carolina. Omar picks up a pad and pencil to take notes. (What is it with pencils at this place? I never see people with pens around Conceptos. I only mention it because I hate pencils, myself.) He encourages Fern to get comfortable and talk some more. Fern explains about the pearl and the flowers. Omar carefully writes this down and says it sounds to him as if this is someone who would give a ridiculous gift like a painting of a seashell. Fern doesn't understand how this can be, if Aldo's marrying Alicia.

Omar offers to investigate. Fern wants to help. Omar says he's going to write him a prescription for suppositories. Fern kicks him. Omar says he'll write an Rx for tranquilizers as well. 200 mg. Fern says that Omar's the one with a mental illness.

Fern admits that he really does need Omar's help. Sara wanders in and tells them about the meeting. They thank her. She gives them a funny look and they say they're on they're way, prompting her to leave. Omar calls Fern "my dear ex-patient - uh, I mean, ex-president." They head towards the boardroom and Omar promises again to get Fern some suppositories.

Marcia's office

Alicia bursts into Marcia's office saying that Lety has ordered her to the boardroom for a meeting "like this," snapping her fingers. "Right now, like this," she repeats. Marcia looks up from her work and asks if Lety ordered her exactly like that. Alicia looks disappointed. Marcia asks her not to make things worse between her and Lety. Alicia admits that it was actually Sara who said it that way. She complains that they were talking about her tomb and her death.

Marcia goes out and asks the cuartel about this macabre little game. "Are you thinking of killing Alicia?" (Come on, who isn't?) She demands that they explain why they were describing her tomb. Sara says that Alicia's the one who started talking about tombs, and said they'd need an oil drill to bury Sara. (I forgot, in some places people are buried vertically. Okay, now it makes sense!) Marcia says if they don't stop, she'll fire both of them. "BOTH!" she repeats in Alicia's face.

Later, Saimon hands out the mail and squabbles with PM. He's still upset about PM dancing with that man.

In the main lobby

Did I ever mention that this is the drabbest main lobby I've ever seen? Nice floor, but not a window in sight. Lola gets off the elevator and Yazmin, who's giggling into a mirror and is dressed even more casually but more attractively than yesterday (because I think orange was a bad color for her), asks where she's going. Yazmin says that when she woke up this morning in the arms of her dear Flaquito... Lola says she doesn't want to know about her private life. Yazmin says she can't even tell Lola about all the things that go on in that bedroom at night, so much passion... yeah, I bet Yazmin gets "headaches" as frequently as humanly possible.

Lola interrupts, says she's in a hurry to go to the judge. Yazmin is under the impression (from Sanchez) that Lola might want a reconciliation. They argue over whether or not Lola would be crazy to want him back and whether or not she actually COULD get him back even if she wanted him. Lola says she just wants the money for her kids, and stomps out.

In Luigi's office

Irma is once again an involuntary eavesdropper, trying to hide a smile (or is it a grimace - I can't tell) as Luigi fights with Ruli over the phone. (I'm guessing she's heard lots of these fights over the years.) Luigi yells something about a filthy teddy bear and slams the phone down. Irma reminds him of the meeting and puts some valerian in his coffee. He rants and raves about how poorly Ruli is treating him. He says the only thing he's lacked on this tragic day was seeing the platypus.

In the Monster Seashell's Lair

The seashell is right-side-up again.

Caro joins Lety in her office and Lety asks Caro to find them a place to have the expo. Aldo comes in and she thanks him for the flowers. Caro suddenly remembers she left some papers in her car and excuses herself. :-) Lety asks Aldo about the pearl he mentioned in the card. He starts to explain, but her phone rings. She answers a question for PM and then asks him to continue, but he'd rather talk about the pearl later, when they're alone. She asks him about this morning's meeting. He sits down and puts on a big smile - the kind of smile that that most people wear when they're happy, but Aldo, cuz he smiles all the time.

He tells her that the problem between himself and Fern is strictly their problem, and not hers. He doesn't want to get into a contest with him, much less put her in the middle of something so nasty. Lety says she just wants to know how the meeting went. (Lety, I think he just told you. ;-) He says nothing serious, but Fern kept trying to embarrass him, and Omar wouldn't let him.

Why not end with a fun meeting?

Luigi runs up to Marcia, who asks if he's okay. He says he feels like he's having something even worse than a mimisqui, and asks Irma for more valerian. She says she already gave him 15 drops. (Is the number 15 significant in Mexican culture? It comes up a lot on this show. Maybe it's Rosy's lucky number?) Now he's offended that she thinks he needs that much. Marcia asks what's wrong, and he says that besides the company being run by someone who's ugly, and having one meeting after another, he's dreading whatever Lety comes up with next. Marcia knows that's not really it, but Luigi evades the question and asks Irma to add some alcohol to his drink so he doesn't burn his eyes looking at Lety.

He goes into the meeting room and calls Fern and Omar Batman and Robin... and now I'm REALLY mad that I never thought to call them that myself. Marcia complains about Lety being late for her own meeting, and all of them having to wait for her. Fern says of course they have to wait for her - she's the president. Lopez comes in (okay suit), saying suckuppy things, followed by Tomas, who avoids making eye contact with everyone in hopes that no one will see him either.

They all stare. They don't even pretend not to. Fern whispers loudly to Marcia that he has one blue (azul) eye and one brown eye. Marcia repeats it to Omar in an angry tone of voice. Omar repeats it to Lopez and Luigi in a more conversational tone, but instead of saying azul, he says "azulado" which basically means the same thing but Lopez hears it as "a su lado" ("on the side"). Lopez says that all eyes are on either one side or the other.

My old boss had one blue eye and one half-blue, half-brown eye. And one was on one side, and one was on the other side. But that's neither here nor there.

Luigi complains to newly-arrived Caro about the "visual aggression" in the room, but his valerian is starting to kick in, and he's in a better mood.

Tomas tires of having Fern stare at his face, and goes to fetch Lety, who is still talking to Aldo. This is the first time Lety has seen the New Tomas. He starts to tell the story about reaching for his mother's stuff while he was half-asleep, but Aldo looks at him disapprovingly and Tomas tells the real story. He wanted to look more like - "Cachirulo!" Lety laughs. I don't know Cachirulo, but I think it has something to do with rollers. Or someone named Lorena Herrera. But Tomas puts his face near Aldo's, and Aldo moves closer to Tomas. With a straight face, Lety says they're exactly alike. He shows her his eyes and says he can't get the other lens out. They all laugh. He reminds her of the meeting. Oh yeah. Pesky work again.

He sees the flowers and asks if he can have them. She says of course not.

In the boardroom, Marcia is still complaining about Lety's lateness. Luigi says it's okay with him if she never shows up. Just then, Lety arrives with her Wonder Twins. Fern acts confused and asks what Aldo's doing there. "Did YOU want him?" he asks Lety. Lety confirms that she invited him, and Aldo thanks Fern for welcoming him. (How he manages to say such things without a hint of sarcasm, I have no idea.) He asks Fern if his presence bothers him.

Fern says yes, it does. He thinks Aldo should stop overstepping his boundaries and go write his book. Aldo asks if Fern thinks he (Aldo) isn't needed, and Fern says yes. Not surprisingly, Luigi disagrees and says Fern doesn't know much about this subject. Fern complains about the chalupas, the tacos, and the refried beans. "And the tlacoyos," Luigi adds.

Aldo does some more esoteric talk about the sense of food, and all that it implies. We all work to get money, and with that money we get a plate of very good food. (Tomas finally speaks up: he agrees about the food.) Food also implies a ritual, sitting down at the table, relaxing, receiving food, eating with the family, with friends; I wonder if Fern and Marcia are remembering what their last dinner together was like!

Best of all, Aldo continues, is savoring the dishes that were prepared with so much love. Luigi dreamily (valerian-induced dreams) agrees. Aldo says there's something else that's the most important: we are gifted with an infinity of flavors, that man can combine to even greater nobility.

Omar says that sounds very good, very interesting. Fern scolds him and says that Aldo's lengthy speeches and cheap philosophy... sorry, folks, it's getting late and I'm falling down on this one. Something about tranquilizing people and making them happy. (Lopez laughs. No one else does.) Aldo puts on big sincere-looking fake smile.

Marcia says, "Do me a favor, Fern - don't be rude to Aldo."

---

Next week
Guillermo wants Fern off of the project.
Will Fern be told to stand in the corner until he can be a big boy? Tune in Monday to find out!

handy words from Alicia's vocabulary
avestruz=ostrich
codazo=elbow
hazana=heroic deed
madrugar=get up early
muchedumbre=crowd

Labels: fea