Caray, Caray!

We open with Gavi being molested by the old norteno guy up in his room, hey the guy does have three bottles of Beer and I think he may be willing to share...Spring is in the air and an old guys fancy turns to love. Gavi is fighting him off, despite her civilized ways of the past ten months or so, she is still got her Jimadora skills. She knees him, he drops, one, two, three, four..he's up and still in the fight, she hits him up the side of his head, he's down...this time for the full eight count...OMG Gavi fears she has killed him, oh crap that does not bode well for a job referral...

Gavi rushes out, comes back with some ice and old guy is Alive..Alive I say, Sr. Max, rushes in...followed by Flavia, the now oldest Virgin on the show & resident Fea...Old Guy quickly invents a story that Gavi was harrassing him, she wants him to pay attention to her and when he wouldn't well she whacked him with a bottle. Oh poor Flavia, if only....anyway Max & Flavia are facing Gavi for a Na Uh! Ya Huh! conversation...Old Guy is standing behind them making faces and smirking big time....

Nancy tells Max that Old Guy is a RatBastard that has been chasing Gavi all these long months and Gavi has done nothing to encourage it. Later Gavi is sitting at a table in the lobby with Nancy lamenting the unfairness of it all, the only thing that would help would be a healthy dose of Tequila...Nancy runs off to get one. Max comes up and sees Gavi, she apoligizes, thinking she is canned and prepares to leave..Hold on there Lil Missy, you take the rest of the day off and come back tommorrow. Wow this Max guy is alright, I hope he doesn't have some terminal disease, as most secondary nice TeleNovela guys do (cough cough)...

Okay now then out at the ranch...SanWannaWannaWanna allthetimea, has cornered Hilario again, I simply can't believe she has been playing hide the chorizo for a year now and Roman and his lovely wife aren't grandparents? Anyway she quizzes Hilario about Rod & Gavi, is he still searching for Gavi? "Nah" counters Hilario, he has forgotten all about her. Hilario tells San WannaWanna that Pa Ingells is gone, so it is hit the hay time.

TWB, wanders out at this moment, somewhere there is a calf that is gonna be mighty cold this winter missing all its skin that went into making some more CFM Dominatrix boots. Where is PETA when you need em? She wanders towards the barn...then she is coming out with a OMG...look, she has seen Hilario & SanWanna, she looks positively weak, she probably couldn't watch more than ten minutes or so, before she left in total disgust...NOT

SanWannaWanna can't wait to fill TWB in on the exciting news, Gavi is yesterday's news, Hilario is evesdropping around the corner, he hears the news being passed on by SanWanna, doble agent.

Back to the lovely Gavi, she is back at home and there is a knock at the door, she looks outside then makes Ma get blindfolded for a big surprise...Two guys bring in the TV & new sewing machine...Ma is dumbfounded & way excited..How oh How can we afford, such things, don't worry Ma; Gavi has found the Mexican Rent to Own...

Back in Jalisco, once again, Rod (who yes he is now GABE from Mundo to Me...shout out to Melinama, she called it first), anyhow he is drinking guess what? Tequila with James & Crispin (possibly the two worst advice givers in all of Mexico)...He is still lamenting Gavi not returning...Why Oh Why, after all he did offer to set her up as his Amante...which actually all things considered was a fairly lucretive offer, but I digress..Rod is now thinking of hiring a detective...(he got dubbed AssHat for the first time this episode, at this point, fear not there are more AssHats coming), ten months later, yeah thank gawd, do it Magnum before the trail gets cold. Basically Crispin and James are like there are more fish in the sea...in fact Crispin calls over two little hotties, Begonia & Petunia, Rod is stunned, he is furious, he leaves...James follows him out, but Rod will listen to no one, these peasents don't understand...Mi Gaviota is his one true love...that's it.

Now back in MX DF, Minnnnnnervvvvva, wanders in to Aaron's business, she quizzes old secretary lady about her husband's whereabouts. Old Sec says Aaron took off somewhere with his assistant Lluvia. Now a restuarant scene with Lluvia in the midst of saving Aaron's life, she is performing the Hoover Maneuver, literally sucking a blockage from Aaron's throat, wow and she types too? Lluvia now literally feeds the weakened Aaron, lifting the fork to his grateful lips. The cellular rings, Aaron answers, it is Minnie, "Where the Hell are you?" she queries, "Oh I am at a meeting and I had to take my ever trusty personal assistant with me, in case she has to take notes, yeah that's it take notes.

Back to Minnie, she does not believe a word of it. After she hangs up, she vows to call his alleged destination, to yes...check up on him....Gotta give her credit, if it was Rod, he be asking the Dream Team, Crispin and James what to do.

Sofie and Pilar are having a conversation, how everyone will be together soon...Well not Daniela cause she is like from another planet, she isn't interested in the family nonsense....Oh Sofie, so young and yet so bitter. ****At this point I must say Granny Pilar has me worried, she needs to check with a doctor, cause I strongly suspect she has Graves Disease. She asks Sofie what plans she has for her own life...Well Sofie has no plans other than to insure her brother impregnate TWB & thus rob Aaron of any chance of inheriting everything. Well she certainly is single minded. Well maybe it is cause if she loses the money, she has no chance of ever finding anyone who will put up with her constant pinched expression, yeah James the Wuss was like a one in a lifetime & I think he's doing muchachas in the Tequilarea...

Rod returns home and Hilario tells Rod about his little white lie. Rod is muy impacto...Hilario shouldn't have lied, TWB, is perfectly aware that once he finds Gavi, he plans to divorce her skanky self and she has no problem with it. Oh Rod, Oh little Dreamer, you are a doble AssHat, how oh how could you be that stupid....Now I have a splitting headache from the anvil that just dropped...Hello TWB, is standing there, yeah right there behind you, she heard the whole thing...

Aaron returns home...I forgot this earlier, but he is dressed in a cornucopia of stripes, his suit is striped, his shirt is striped, his tie is striped....Dude unlike your women, when it comes to patterns, less is more.
He is all "Honey I'm Home". Minnie is leaning against the whole doing her best, I'm gonna kick your Ass, "Pink Lady Stance"..Aaron picks up a Havana & to my delight Minnie knocks it out of his mouth, he shoves her back...she tells him she called up on him today and he didn't go to a meeting. Aaron grinds his fist down on the table and seriously clenches face muscles I didn't even know humans had. No woman is gonna control him...get that...you barren skank...She throws a picture frame down, he tells her, she's got two months to get pregnant...that's it...This was a kinda kinky fight...you could tell they were both gettin turned on by all the pushing, shoving and threats.

Meanwhile...Rod is sitting and typing on a computer, I think it was about the Spring Agave Harvest...then he starts having Gavi thoughts...Damn, he smiles that smile...I must resist..I must resist...Whew thank gawd I still am having Anvil pain, or I'd been been Rod's lil Rangerette again, with pom-poms and everything.

Gavi is thinking of Rod...she goes outside and is up on the roof...the Bascilica is behind her....
REMEMBER THIS....THE BASCILICA IS BEHIND HER!!!!!!There is moon-light, a song plays
she is having Rod flash backs...Now Rod is down under the tree, he is having Gavi flash backs...
Now Gavi is under the ANGEL STATUE.....this is what is wrong...I hate to be picky, but the Angel Statue is on Reforma...quite a ways from the Bascilica...trust me on this...so unless Gavi hopped a bus and went to the Angel Statue...well I guess it is poetic or something, but anyone who is Mexican knows they are far apart and Gavi wouldn't be just wandering around MX DF at nite...jest sayin...Rod is now perched in a tree and there is a fire going, why oh why haven't you returned Gavi? I hope this isn't dead gramps resting place.

TWB gets up outta bed and opens the balcony, she languishes against the doorframe...she definately has an itch and it just ain't gettin scratched.

Two more months fly by....Time for Rod and TWB, to pack up and go to Mexico City...Rod is giving James his cell number, like James didn't have it? He is telling James to call him should Gavi return. TWB is going out to the love nest or the barn...Hil is grooming a horse, Hil is shirtless, TWB comes up behing Hil and the horse is giving her the eye. For a second this looks like the opening scene from some really raunchy payforview movie, (hey I have never seen one but I used to work for DigiCable and had to run a query everyday of PPV titles...Oh yes they are pretty explicit). She is wearing some serious bling...her skin tite jeans look like something Leo from Mundo, bedazzeled in his spare time. TWB questions, Hil about Rod & Gav, but he isn't giving any info up.

Aaron's Old Secretary (old as in age) is over at Minnies, basically telling her skank Lluvia does nothing but Aaron, just then Minnie gets a call that yes she is pregnant..Yepee, she tell Old Sec she will take care of everything.

At the office Lluvia, comes in to Aaron's office with the pretense of showing him some papers, but of course it is just a pretense, she ending up on his lap and he tells her it is fine; his wife is not allowed in his office...Another Anvil...the door opens and Aaron and Lluvia are trying to do tongue transplants without actually using a surgeon...Ahhh the Hoover Maneuver...Minnie..what the Hell? Lluvia jumps up, apoligizes (well kinda) and runs out....Aaron in another fashion forward cascade of conflicting stripes, tries to tell her, things are not as they appear. Minnie is all like shut-up AssHat, I'm pregnant and if you ever wanna see this kid, there is a new Sheriff in town and we're playin by my rules..fire the skank...He calls the Skank in and fires her, totally berating her, he then shoves her out the door...Damn why doesn't someone organize the Mexican Labor Force? Where is Jaime Hoffa when you need him? Aaron says don't say anything until the big meeting & they kiss passionately....
>>>>>>>>>I totally think Aaron will do a Cat on a Hot Tin Roof at the Meeting", "Yes indeed. This girl has life in her body. And that's no lie." >>>>>Then drink doble dobles.

Back at the ranch SanWanna & TWB are packing everything TWB ever owned right down to the smallest thong panty...What asks Rod, we are only going for two maybe three days. Well she just wants to have everything in case she needs it...Yeah right.

Gavi sees and ad in the paper for executive assistant to General Director of Tequila is us...which would be Aaron..Gavi goes home and Ma has made her a new dress with her new sewing machine.

Minnie is talking to Sofie and Pilar...they are in the new apartment Pilar got for Rod and TWB...they are talking about men, Rod and the jimadora & Aaron and anything with a pulse...Minnie is wearing stiletto boots, geez, I would think she'd have sensible flats and bubble wrap around her, considering...Sofie asks Pilar if Gramps was unfaithful. Pilar gets a far away look in her bulging eyes............(Actually she said something, but I missed it).....

Will Gavi become Aarons next Sex-A-Teri?
Will Rod drive down the street and almost run into Gavi (a-la Gabe style?)....hey is not beyond the realm of mathmatical possibility...odds like one in 20 million to the nth degree

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