Caray, Caray!

Orlando and Alina are riding. He proposes marriage to her but she refuses, nicely I might add, and says he's a good friend but she doesn't love him. He scowls, like he's the only person in the world whose ever heard that. Boo hoo.

Angel reads Alina's letter and comments to Emilio that it sounds like she and Orlando are getting mighty chummy. Emilio tells him not to worry, Orlando knows Angel plans to marry her. Angel reads aloud to Emilio the part of Alina's letter that she asks him to keep from Emilio, that Emilio hates her and ordered Thelma to humiliate her. "That's weird," comments Emilio. Guess what? Angel accuses Emilio of still loving Alina. Guess what? Emilio denies it.

Orlando and Alina ride together and he thought bubbles, "You're going to be mine, if not by good means then by bad." Just then Tonki runs up. "Damn dog," Orlando thought bubbles,"now I'm going to have to wait!"

Donloco stares at Luba's box and recalls when Luba tried to give it to him some time ago (I don't know or remember exactly when). She was telling him that she wanted to talk to him about his mother. Alvaro rudely tells her he doesn't want to talk about That Woman and hey, what's in the box? Luba says it's something that will cause pain, it's a story of life or death that won't interest him.

Back in the present, Donloco wonders aloud about the box. Just as he's about to open it Sergio runs in. There's a quarrel at the coffee plantation and Donloco is needed immediately. The box remains on the desk, wrapped in twine. Probably hemp twine.

Luba is in Macario's cave. She complains that she can't get into the hacienda to give his potion to Thelma. Macario says it's the only way to remove the malignancy that is Thelma. Luba asks for something else, maybe an amulet that will make Thelma go crazy? Rubbing his chin, Macario says he can invoke a prayer that just might make her loca.

Gaspar bursts into Macario's cave and yells at Luba that what everybody says is true, she's a bad witch, a very bad witch!

Donloco's foreman tells him that all the workers want to go work at La Rinconada because they heard Sr. Valtierra gives raises. Donloco doesn't want to pay his workers more. I apologize, I didn't pay much attention to this conversation, except that Donloco got mad at the foreman, told him to shut up, told him not to tell him how to run his business, and insulted him by calling him a Banana Monkey. That last bit got my attention.

Gaspar yells at Luba and then turns his wrath on Macario, he calls him a naughty witch. Macario call Gaspar 'headless' and says he has no business talking to Macario that way. Macario actually refers to himself in the third person, talk about putting on airs. "Oh yeah?" yells Gaspar, "I'm stronger than you!" He proceeds to strangle the naughty witch. Luba knocks Gaspar on the head with a bottle and he's out cold.

Soledad feeds Mariana some pureed mangos or some other orange food when Donloco arrives bearing good news. Gosh, he seems so pleased with himself it must be something fabulous! He tells Mariana that her Dr. friend came to see her but he (Donloco) threw him (Dr. Love) out into the street along with his good intentions. Don't worry, he'll never come to bother her again! Mariana's eyes bug out and she starts to wheeze and choke.

Soledad scolds Donloco for being so insensitive and cruel to Mariana. "Wha...I thought she'd like to know he's an opportunist!" bawls Loco. Hmmmph, he leaves in a huff. Tears run down Mariana's face and Soledad realizes Mariana wanted to see the doc. "Ahhh, you love him," whispers Soledad.

Rosita tells Alina that she has some great news, she's going to marry Santos!! Somehow Don Max has managed to squeeze his girth behind some rocks; he eavesdrops on the girls and looks really pissed off to hear Rosita's happy news.

Orlando tells Thelma that Alina refused his proposal. Duh. Thelma cackles with glee. He says he was about to take Alina to dead Jose's cabin but then her maldito dog showed up and he had to abort the plan.

Don Max is in a right snit. He orders Castulo to kill Santos immediately or else. Castulo promises that he will kill Santos slowly and painfully.

Luba's box sits on Donloco's desk in the dark. Sinister flute music plays and something inside starts glowing. Does the box contain radioactive waste? A Dilithium Crystal? Green Kryptonite? Suddenly a pair of hands (they look feminine) snatch the box from the desk.

Alina tells Rosita and Vera that Orlando proposed to her but she refused because she doesn't love him. Vera seems kind of bummed, she thinks the Lietenant is cute and could help Alina out.

Soledad tells Mariana that she's come up with a way for Mariana to communicate with her and Adela. One eye blink means yes and two mean no, OK? Blink. Soledad asks is there anything that Mariana wants to tell her? Blink. About the doctor? Blink blink. Not the doctor, then Alvaro? Blink blink. Not Alvaro, then what? Mariana thought bubbles in Dobly 11 "I want to tell you about Jose, I had a daughter, the letter was for ME!" Soledad, clueless, pats Mariana's hand; for now they will just work on getting Mariana what she needs.

Luba wakes Gaspar. She says hitting him hurt her more than it did him. She didn't want a jailbird for a son. He begs her not to hurt Thelma. He knows Thelma is bad but he wants to see his little cub, he wants to hold it in his arms. Luba cries and says she wants a little cub too. They hug.

Santos and Rosita play kissy face outside her door. They don't seem to notice Castulo nearby on a very active and restless horse. She's worried about Santos riding to the pueblo at night.

Sergio is in Donloco's office. Donloco says Mariana's Dr. doesn't fool him and he sends Sergio off to find out where Dr. Love went. Alone, Donloco notices the box is gone. "What did I do with it? Am I going loco?"

Castulo ambushes Santos and tells him he has a message from his father. "He told me to kill you," Castulo says and slaps Santos off his horse. Castulo leaps off his own horse and puts a gun to Santos' head. He says before he kills Santos he's going to tell him a little secret, "It wasn't Don Max who raped Rosita, it was I! Bwahahahaha..." Santos lunges at Castulo and they wrassle around until Castulo punches Santos out. What happened to the ass-kicking Santos from last week? I miss him already. Maybe having sex with Rosita sapped his strength. Nahhh, I know from experience that such a thing doesn't exist. Quite the opposite. Oops, maybe I've said too much, back to the recap...

Donloco paces, wondering aloud where that damn woman is. "Alfonsina!!!!" he bellows. Alfonsina rushes in, shoving her decolletage into her tight dress, "I was just arranging myself to look pretty for you." He asks about the documents she put in front of his drunken face, what was it she was trying to get him to sign? She plays dumb but he doesn't fall for it. He keeps pressing... "Oh, THOSE papers," she admits, "just a game you invented in your drunkenness. You asked me to write a letter for you like the kiddies write to Santa, telling him what I always wanted and you were going to give it to me for being a good girl. Yeah, that's the ticket, a letter to Santa." Honestly, who writes this crap? They couldn't come up with a better story than a letter to Santa? Stupid Alvaro let's it go but he keeps calling her sonsa (idiot) throughout the conversation. What a guy.

Emilio visits Coral in her upscale house to cry on her shoulder about Alina. Dario the evil nephew eavesdrops for half a second before running off to his uncle. "Poor tio, this must be the dancer's other man."

Sergio tells Donloco that the rumor is the little Dr. ran off to San Mateo, probably for good. "You think he's going to leave his gold mine behind? He'll be back," says Donloco.

San Mateo - Santos's hot mom is making lots of shrimp cocktails for the noon rush. She's waiting for Santos to arrive, she dreamed of him all night and she's worried.

Orlando walks out to the stables with Ifigenia. Tonki runs toward Orlando and barks viciously at him. Tonki hates Orlando. Dogs can sense things you know. Orlando orders Jaime to tie Tonki up. Jaime does it begrudgingly, saying the señorita always likes Tonki free to accompany her.

Flor visits a swollen Thelma in her room. It must be time for the afternoon boring chat from hell. Thelma adjusts the watermelon under her shirt as Alina tells her that she's going with Orlando to see her mother. Thelma pretends to care. After Alina leaves Thelma tells her singing aunt that she hopes today is the day that Orlando does the dirty deed to Alina. "Poor girl," titters Auntie Estupida, which angers Thelma. She's sick of people feeling sorry for Alina. Join the club Jiffy Pop. Auntie says the lietenant's not so bad, she wouldn't mind being trapped by him. "That desperate, eh?" asks Thelma.

Santos wakes up tied to a tree. He yells for help. He's no MacGyver, that's for sure. Santos is the anti-MacGyver. He probably doesn't even own a roll of duct tape.

Orlando and Flor are riding. She's wearing a fetching tailored shirt that bulges apart at her cleavage, perhaps not the best thing to wear around a guy whose marriage proposal you just refused. Alina wonders where Tonki is. They see Jose's cabin and Alina says it brings back bad memories for her. Orlando says the best way to deal with those memories is to confront them by going directly into the cabin. "Duh, that's a great idea," stupid Alina says, smiling stupidly.

Soledad tells Mariana that Adela told her that she (Mariana) was good friends with the caporal Jose, true? Blink, pant, wheeze. Soledad sees that Mariana is affected and continues, did she know Jose had a daughter? Blink, grunt grunt, wheeze. Who is the daughter? Oops, Mariana's eyes bug out; she can't blink an answer to that one.

Emilio visits Angel's doctor to ask about his brother's progress. The doc tells Emilio that he should believe what his brother tells him. I know you all will be shocked to hear that those two sentences are the condensed version of three entirely separate scenes.

Orlando escorts Alina into the cabin and jams the door shut. He grabs her and tells her a man in love doesn't accept 'No' for an answer*. "You're going to be mine," he hisses. "Help! Help me!" she yells. "Help! Help her!" he yells back, mocking her.
* What an asshat would say

Tonky is tied to a cart back at La Rinconada. He barks and barks until Vera walks by and frees him. He runs like the wind. Run Tonki, run!!!

Donloco paces the house looking for the box. He accuses Adela of taking it. "I never saw the box," she insists, "are you sure you didn't imagine it?" This sets Donloco off and he paces and mutters with renewed vigor.

Alina struggles out of Orlando's grip and asks him what in the hell he thinks he's doing, she thought he was good. He blathers a bit about Emilio, Angel, the first time he saw Alina he loved her, yada yada...

Cut to Luba yelling at Gaspar outside the cabin. Alina tries to yell but Orlando covers her mouth.

Gaspar and Luba argue about what Gaspar will do to Macario if Luba doesn't stop casting spells on Thelma. She says she already told Macario to give it a rest. They stalk off in different directions. Things aren't looking good for Alina.

Donloco paces, obsesses about the box, and decides Luba must have stolen it back.

Dr. Ricardo Love is in the corrupt police station telling the corrupt police chief that he demands action against Donloco's criminal activities. He should be punished for denying his sister proper medical treatment. The corrupt chief calls in his corrupt policemen and tells them to arrest Dr. Love. He will call Donloco and ask him what to do with this city doctor. Dr. Love is muy impactado.

In the middle of Orlando's premeditated rape, he and Alina have a stupid conversation about whether or not she loves Emilio. I'm wondering what does it matter? Orlando plans to rape her so what's up with the yackety yack?

Soledad tells Adela that Mariana knows who Jose's daughter is. She'll call Alvaro in and Mariana can tell him to his face, by one blink I guess, that Soledad is innocent. Oy vay. Adela's not convinced that Donloco will believe Mariana's blink. Ya think?

Slimy Dario, evil nephew of Celso, tells his uncle that Coral already has another lover. Celso gets angry and kicks him out. Finally, somebody with one brain cell's worth of sense. Coral comes to Celso's bedside, he wisely asks her about Emilio. Coral says Emilio's not her lover but she has no reason to lie to Celso. Although there is nothing between them, Emilio is the only man she's ever loved. If that bothers Celso and he wants to leave her with nothing she'll understand, but other than that nothing will change between them. Celso smiles and holds her hand.
Coral-1 / Dario-0.

Alina yells for help and tries to hit Orlando with a bottle. Of course he wrestles it away from her. She screams. Tonki arrives and barks at the door. Orlando laughs, the door is locked so her damn dog can't get in. He throws Alina on the bed and starts ripping the sleeves off her shirt. Suddenly Tonki leaps through the conveniently opened window, in super slow-mo so as to accentuate his leaping prowess, and pushes Orlando onto the ground. Alina grabs a conveniently placed stick and whacks Orlando unconcious.

Luba is in the bushes muttering about Gaspar when she sees Alina and Tonki making a mad dash from the cabin to the horses.

Orlando picks himself up off the floor, groaning and holding his back where Mighty Tonki pushed him with his super claws. Orlando runs to his horse as Luba watches, impactada.

Coral tells Celso there never was and never will be anything between her and Emilio, he loves another. Celso looks off and says "That's true love Coral."

Emilio and Angel plan to return to Sierra Escondido. Big whoop.

As Orlando gets on his horse Luba steps out from hiding and plants herself in his path. Orlando says the maldito dog attacked him. Luba doesn't believe him. He rides around her and she says she knows very well what went on in the cabin, he can't fool her. She vows that bad people like him WILL PAY in this lifetime. I think the time for empty threats is past, I'd like to see Luba do something with that nasty looking knife of hers.

The corrupt chief of police tells Donloco he can decide what to do with Dr. Love. They are in Donloco's office. Dr. Love says he's only worried about Mariana. Loco pays off the corrupt chief of police with a big wad of cash and kicks him out. He wants to talk to the doctor alone.

Loco and Love glare at each other.

Vera, Ifegenia and Jaime are yucking it up over a bale of hay when Flor rides up with her sleeve ripped off. She won't tell them anything and she runs away. Jaime says the damn lieutenant probably abused her.

"What part of 'I don't want you to see my sister' do you not understand?" asks Donloco. "Are you going to kill me?" asks Dr. Love. "How much money will it take for you to leave my sister in peace?" asks Donloco. Where do conversations go when the sentences are only in questions? Nowhere, that's where.

We are in Mariana's room and it looks like Soledad has locked something in a chest and put the key in her pocket. Could it be the radioactive box? Mariana thought bubbles, loudly because she cannot speak, that she hopes Ricardo returns for her, he'll refuse money and Alvaro will see that he's wrong, he will have to accept that Ricardo loves her.

Dr. Love is indignant at Donloco's offer of money. What does Donloco take him for? Donloco says his grill is just getting warmed up, the doctor can name his price. Dr. Love gets huffy. "Look," says Loco, "with money even the dog dances, right? Everybody has their price, what's yours?" Money doesn't seem to work and Donloco threatens the doctor, but Ricardo asks why can't Donloco just believe that he really loves Mariana? He accuses Donloco of being sick, of being loco. "Shut up! I prohibit you from calling me loco," Alvaro shouts. "Of course I can't," says Ricardo sarcastically, "not in the current situation."

"Good," says Donloco ominously "because since we are in this situation, Doctor, you get to decide, will it be silver or lead?"


Chango bananero! = You banana monkey!
descabezado = headless
maloro/a = naughty
cachorro/a = next generation
cachorrito/a = little cub
sonso/a = fool, idiot

Tonight, a bonus for the gentlemen. Some time ago Ferro pointed out that the actress who plays Alfonsina was a Miss Bikini Latina winner. Siena Perezcano is quite the hardbody. She may be genetically (OK, and a little cosmetically) gifted, but it takes hard work to get and keep the abs and glutes that she has. Not only was she Miss Bikini Latina 2005 she was also a Miss Bikini Universe and has had podium finishes (nice talk for 2nd and 3rd place) in other competitions. I read somewhere that in one of the competitions she wore a sexy Mariachi outfit but I couldn't find a picture of that, darn! She is an anti-drug activist. I think she is the perfect woman to put Donloco in his place! You go Alfonsina!!

Labels: duelo