Caray, Caray!

Recap of yesterday's WWF event in Orlando. Octopus is leading Peyote by the hand through the lobby. She's going to have Puncho arrested for bigamy. Peyote just whines that she still loves her Varon. Octopus is wearing some cheesy purple one-piece polyester jumpsuit. Hideous can't begin to describe it. I'd be humiliated to be seen with her in an upscale hotel lobby if I was Peyote as well.

Fidiota and Dimwit are lamenting the evil Bruno. Bruno wants to see Dimwit suffer the worst possible pain because Maxi-Moron loves Dimwit more than Debora and Marfil. Bruno wants to die knowing Dimwit will NEVER see Mini-Max again! Orchestra of Doom. . .

More mother-daughter boring conversation about Puncho. "He's trash!" v. "I love him!" This boring scene is interrupted by Pasta. "What is SHE doing here? I want her out of MY house NOW after what she's done to MY daughter!" Now all three start fighting amongst themselves. Pasta storms out saying he wants Peyote out of his house immediately!

Maxi-Moron is faux crying. His eyes are squinty but I see no tears. His adam's apple is bobbing. He doesn't want to leave the hospital not knowing where his son is. Marfil talks him into going home with her. It's pointless for him to remain; they can return tomorrow morning. He finally agrees and they leave.

The Keanu Reeves look-alike doc is re-bandaging The Mummy's hand. He wants to know if she plans to undo the bandages around her face. Mummy says no. They discuss her wounds. Her face will be OK, I believe, but all her hair has been burned off. She and Sylvie can now bond over wigs.

Dimwit and Fidiota are still discussing Bruno and the missing baby.

Debora tells Doc Keanu that her name is Raisa Campos. She has no family. Apparently someone saw the fire and rescued her. Pobre de Raisa. After DoK leaves, she tells us no one can know she's alive. Everyone is going to pay for what has happened to her, including Dimwit!

Emili-Oh and Caramel are in la sala talking to Little Doormat. Little Doormat tells them about Mini-Max and asks about Orlando. "Let me tell you about what happened in Orlando!"

Lala is "nursing" Puncho's wounds, by pressing on them to cause the most pain. She basically says he deserves what he got for having both wives at the same hotel. Puncho doesn't get it. He's a Varon! He wants to go to Perfumes 'R Us and punch Emili-Oh. Lala doesn't like that idea. Finally Lala slaps his face in the same place he got punched by Pasta and/or Emili-Oh.

Octopus is waiting for Pasta with a drink in her hand. Pasta walks in and wants to know if Peyote is finally gone. "There's something you need to know about her. . ." says Octopus. The OoD strikes an ominous chord.

Sandy and Sylvie are drinking in Paco's Palace. Sandy looks like a raccoon with blue make-up surrounding her eyes. Sylvie, ah Sylvie. She's got some sort of lavender wig that makes her look like a Lhasa Apso. I think she's got pony tails sticking out both sides of her head. They are lamenting their bad luck with men, but Sandy points out Puncho is the lowest of low! Of all the gin joints in the world, who should walk in but Camila and Doc Evil. Oh, they are NOT happy to see Sylvie!

Eugenia is helping Isabel clean the apartment. They are discussing what to do about the baby. Isabel is afraid if she tells the police, they will think she stole the baby.

Fidiota is tucking in Dimwit for the night. Heartfelt music plays in the background. As Fidiota enters the hall, she runs into Caramel and Gaby. "It's best to let Dimwit sleep right now. You can see her in the morning."

Yolanda, Rene, Lunkhead, Emili-Oh, Marfil, and Max are discussing Bruno. Max says something about Bruno daring to do something, but I couldn't understand. The Orchestra of Doom did, since they hit a crescendo and we cut to commercial. Does anyone know what this was all about? I was too tired to replay it eighty times to figure it out.

Pasta and Octopus fight about Peyote living there with them. Octopus says Peyote needs her. Pasta calls her an unfit mother. About the only thing they can agree on is Puncho being a loser. Pasta wants Peyote gone. He storms off and Octopus comments that if only that imbecile knew Peyote is his daughter.

Camilla, Iggy, and Sylvie exchange words. Finally a fight breaks out and everyone in the bar is involved, extras included.

Emili-Oh and Maxi-Moron are discussing the missing Mini-Max. Emili-Oh apologizes for not telling Max that Max was the father of Dimwit's baby. Emili-Oh was sworn to secrecy by Octopus and didn't want to lose his job at the factory. Max says he understands. Max's Adam's apple is bobbing in and out while Max is trying to force himself to cry for the scene. He goes back to lemon sucking mode with a single Glycerine Tear of True Dolor slipping from his eye.

The Miami jail has never seen this much action. The set designers have been working overtime. Everyone from Pasta's bar has been hauled in. With a touch of reality, Iggy and Camila have been thrown into the same cell. Sandy and Sylvie are thrown into another. In true telenovela fashion, who should Sylvie and Sandy be sharing a cell with but the transvestites! Happy reunion time, but the reunion is cut short. A fight ultimately breaks out between the two sets of cells. CFM's and purses fly back and forth and everyone is shouting. Peppy disco music plays in the background.

It's the next morning and Dimwit is on her way to the hospital, against Fidiota's orders. She tells Gaby and Caramel she is going to renounce Max to Bruno, in order to find the whereabouts of Mini-Max.

Diablo is in the Library pacing back and forth. He tells us he can walk normally now, but he's going to play the role of invalid for Dimwit's sake. Only Puncho knows the truth. He needs to be able to walk in case Bruno spills the beans about his involvement with Mini-Max's disappearance. Suddenly we see the door crack open. "Tu!" says Diablo. "Now you know my secret!"

Little Doormat wants Dimwit to tell Max first, but Dimwit refuses. She has to renounce Max forever. ***Can someone explain to me why Dimwit doesn't just tell Bruno what Bruno wants to hear? I suppose if she did the logical thing, we wouldn't be calling her Dimwit.***

Max is having a conversation with the police commissioner. Yolanda asks what's going on and if he's heard any news. They then talk about Bruno being an evil woman. Marfil overhears and defends her mother and yells at Yolanda. Maxi-moron heads off to the hospital with Marfil scurrying after him. Yolanda follows them out.

The nurse takes Mummy for a walk. Dramatic music plays. Who should walk in but Dimwit. The Mummy is impactada. Dimwit recognizes the Mummy's eyes. "What's your name?" Dramatic music plays. Commercial.

Diablo starts yelling about "Now you know my secret!!! Come here right now and close the door!!!" Poor Nancy walks in and Diablo starts strangling her and threatening to kill her if she says a word to anyone. Maybe now Nancy will get Diablo out of her system. Why would anyone want to hurt poor, sweet, innocent Nancy? She's even more naïve than Little Doormat! Jorge really needs to save her.

The nurse tells Dimwit Mummy's name is Raisa. Dimwit wants to know why she can't speak for herself. The nurse says Raisa is timid. She has burns on her hand and face. Dimwit excuses herself and our "fiery" Little Formerly-Blonde Weasel gets hysterical. She wants to return to her room pronto. She doesn't care what the DoK says! Once back in her room, she decides to take her vengeance on everyone while she's in Mummy mode.

Dimwit goes into Bruno's room and talks to DoK. In violation of HIPAA, DoK tells Dimwit Bruno is not doing well. They are expecting the worst.

Diablo is still throttling Nancy. He keeps yelling at her to keep quiet. Tears are pouring down Nancy's face. He stops strangling her long enough to make her promise not to say a word to ANYONE, including his mother, that he can walk. When she asks why, he says he has his reasons. He promises her if she keeps his secret, he will dump Dimwit and love her. Only her. They can be together forever. Nancy the Ninny believes him and swears she won't say a word. As they hug, Diablo rolls his eyes at the camera.

Maxi-Moron arrives at the hospital with Marfil. As Marfil is running into Bruno's room, Max wants to know if Bruno has said anything about the whereabouts of Maxito. "Not a word," says DoK.

Rene is visiting Yolanda. He wants to propose something. "What?" asks Yolanda. "When Maxito is found, I want us to get married." The Big Doormat starts to protest, but Rene says he doesn't want to talk about the age thing again. I don't want them to talk about the age thing again either. At the end of the scene, it looks like Yolanda is seriously thinking about it.

Marfil enters Bruno's room where Dimwit is waiting at Bruno's side. Bruno is still asleep.

Little Doormat calls Max and tells him that Dimwit is going to renounce him in order to find out where their son is. O of D. Commercial.

Rene is still begging Yolanda to say yes. I'm on the edge of my chair. Finally she agrees and we get to see the dimples I've been missing all these episodes! Those dimples are worth the 45-minute wait! Rene is so excited he lets out a whoop as he exclaims "We're engaged!" Yolanda actually softens and appears the happiest I've seen her these past 102 episodes. I bet she's thinking that if the show ends soon, maybe she'll get to wear better clothing on her next telenovela.

Max rushes into Bruno's room looking for Dimwit. "Did she promise anything to Bruno?" Marfil has no idea what he's talking about. Bruno is still asleep. Marfil wants to know what Dimwit was promising. "Nothing," says Max.

Cousin Eddie's wife Princess Fiona is swigging brandy, lounging on the bed, and uttering the name "Maximiliano! I've never been able to forget your kisses." This is too disturbing for me to even contemplate any further. Thankfully, the scene is short.

Diablo is screaming at Little Doormat for meddling in his marriage and calling Max. He is reading her the riot act when Fidiota comes downstairs and wants to know what all the yelling is about. "Nothing" they say in unison. Diablo rolls away and Fidiota tells Gaby she's on her way into court to talk to the judge about the case against Little Doormat. They hug.

Dimwit is talking to DoK. She has to promise Bruno she'll dump Max in order to find out where her baby is. Her baby needs her. She needs to make the sacrifice. Now DoK doesn't look like Keanu Reeves to me. The heat in Arizona must be affecting my eyesight.

DoK agrees to let Dimwit see Bruno and make her pact with the devil, but he needs to check Bruno first.

Eugenia is bringing the newspaper and milk to Isabel. The baby recording starts playing in the background. As they go to check on him, the camera pans to the unread paper. Front and center is an article about the stolen baby.

DoK asks Bruno if she can handle another visitor. Dimwit want to promise her something. Marfil wants to know what. Bruno agrees to see Dimwit. DoK motions Dimwit in and makes Bruno promise to not get agitated. Bruno wants to be alone with Dimwit. Once Dimwit and Bruno are alone, they stare at each other while the O o D hammers away.

As Eugenia is leaving, she tells Isabel to relax and read the paper. Isabel picks up the paper and sees the article about Maxito. She runs to the door screaming for Eugenia to come back quickly!

Dimwit promises a million times she'll dump Max. She and the baby will move a bazillion miles away where Max will never find them. She swears. Bruno gloats. Show ends.

Credits roll.

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