Caray, Caray!

James realizes that Acacia spent the night in the Montalvo barn, not cause she saw "National Velvet", and wants to be the next Liz Taylor, but because she remembers the horrors of Dry Gulch Acres. James says Hot Damn, now we can go to the authorities. Acacia can’t do that cause the fact that it went on for years is too painful. She runs off. Just about this time Hilario and Rod join James, Rod says she needs to see the doctor, but at least she remembers. James and Rod start to walk off; as little "Slutty Sunshine", SannnnaaaWannnnna skips up (have you noticed she doesn’t walk, she actually skips everywhere…maybe it enhances the bounce factor), she does a special hello, but no one pays no real attention. She asks Hilario what is happening and he tells her Acacia spent the night in the barn and she has regained her memory….Ha Ha Ha SannnnnaaaWannnnaa foiled again.

Gavi is going out on another day of hauling Encyclopedias around in her little suitcase. It looks like those rolling suitcases the drug reps are always dragging around in my doctor’s office. Here is the deal Gavi, people think drug reps are swarmy, but they do love those samples…encyclopedias not so much. Gavi gives the full spiel to an educator’s secretary who finally allows her to wait until the educator’s meeting is done.

Over at Dry Gulch Acres Tio Meliton is working on his first fifth of Tequila for the day. A guy comes up and gives him some money, my husband says he thinks the guy bought Meliton’s truck. Back at the Hacienda, James and Rod are discussing working on the project.
Over at the Hacienda SannaWannaSpredSomeGossip is passing the 411 along to Sofie about Acacia regaining her memory. Sofie looks her normal none too happy pinch face self.

Sofie starts laying the guilt on Rod that he must go to Mexico City and work things out with Isa, before Isa does something really crazy. Like name the real father? Anyway James promises to hold down the Hacienda till Rod gets back. Sofie is returning to Mexico DF & James is like, "It was very nice seeing you, hope you have a great trip." You can tell Sofie is totally pissed that James did not beg her forgiveness and ask her to return. Please, not even Sofie can seriously believe she could have two guys interested in her at the same time.

Acacia is making a mean batch of salsa and putting some poison weed into it. Here comes Meliton yelling at her until he smells the bueno comida. Give me some food. Acacia puts it on the table and Melion starts wolfing down salsa taquitos, it is good, emmmm just the way he likes it. Acacia has a look that would put Minnie in her place. Dead eyes Dead eyes.

The educator’s meeting is over and Gavi goes in to give him her sales pitch, he gives her five minutes but stops her after one minute and just invites her to lunch..no sales here.

Outside of the new Montalvo School of Tequila Tasters, ***where was this school when I was in the guidance counselors office in High School? Anyway James says he wants to buy a house and live with Acacia. Rod says he has to go back to Mexico DF & talk to Isa as they are going to be parents. James gives the "Que the Hell?" expression. By the end of the episode it will be a legendary HannaBarBara expression of muy impactedness. From now on I declare any "No Puede Ser" moment to quickly be followed by an "Artificial Insemination" muttered slightly under the breath. Rod you are a legend.

Gavi is now trying to sell to a Catholic School, the Nun seems very excited and misunderstands Gavi’s offer thinking "Praise be to God", that the books are a donation to the school.

Isadora passing along the news that she has the next Agave Empanada baking in her oven. In answer to Minnie's how in the hell look, Isa anwers "Artificial Insemination". Isa is spreading the "I’ll be raising the child alone" dogma on like jelly on peanut butter really thick. She will never return to Rod the evil Traitor.

There is a knock at the door and as Minnie, (in an already muy impacted state) goes to answer it I am able to see that the entire house has been turned into a "Having Your Baby" set. A delivery guy gives Minnie a package of documents and she is all like, "Por Moi?"…She opens the package….it is divorce papers from Aaron. "Que Es?" inquires TWB, as the look on Minnie’s face is rather alarming. He is divorcing me…Now bring on the BSC, Minnie starts trashing everything, oh I shudder at the thought of the hideous tortures the little stuffed animals are about to receive. Isa tries to tranquilize her with the oft-uttered TeleNovela line, "Calmate", and of course this has little or no effect. Minnie is throwing things, ripping things and finally falls down because she is of course in CFM heels on marble while in the midst of an awesome hissy. Isa tries to help her up, but backs away. Really I would too cause Minnie is not to be reasoned with and Isa has got to protect her little Empanada. Minnie throws open the front door and screams for Isa to get out. Minnie runs upstairs cause that is a whole new floor of fun baby stuff to trash. Isa is leaving and Aaron comes in the door. Aaron is surprised at the mess and asks Isa what is going on. Isa is like "you need to talk to your wife; oh and good luck AssHat".

Aaron dashes up "The Stairway of Tragedy" into the slightly over decorated nursery and Minnie is on the floor beside the babybed. Aaron asks her if she is pregnant. "Ask my lawyer Asshat," is her answer. The fight is on. Aaron says give me the papers and forget it. Aaron is trying to weasel out of it, now that Minnie may be pregnant. She is not so forgiving. She quotes the irreconcilable differences. Aaron looks chagrined and tries to skirt around the issue. He keeps asking is she or is she not pregnant. Hey this guy really knows how to bring the romance. She queries back would it change things. Then with some satisfaction she gets to be the bearer of bad tidings…she throws up in Aaron’s face that Isa is pregnant with Rod’s baby. Aaron jerks back like he has been slapped.
****Sidebar****Is it just me or is Aaron’s hair darker? Also I feel the mixing of pattens..note the stripes may have something to due with Aaron’s lack of judgement in other areas of his life****

She starts tearing things up and smacking on Aaron he is trying to calm her down.
Aaron tells her don’t worry about money, he’ll help her out. I’m telling you this guy is one sweet talker.
Minnie starts tearing things up, there is pushing and shoving she is smacking on him. Aaron tells her Stop Stop…oh yeah that is gonna work, for a long moment they look at each other and I am thinking they may start kissing and have that Hawt Hate Sex that most of their married life has been based upon. No that romantic vision is not to be. The disagreement now turns even uglier…Minnie is lying on the twin bed she just purchased for the new little Monty…She tells him keep his money and spend it on his next woman. Aaron says forgive me… Minnie spews more venom and Aaron tells her to calm down. Minnie won’t be calm until she sees him in jail where he should have been born, lived and died. Oh Snap!! Aaron turns back around and goes over to the bed and jerks Minnie by her hair. "Are you threatening me?" Damn you!! Minnie retorts society would be grateful if she freed it from a deliquent like him. (Wow, nice talk Miss Morality)..Oh Aaron comes back while carefully doing his best to extend her hair a good six inches by pulling on it, that if he went to jail basically is would be better than the pain in the ass that Minnie is. They do the stare down and Minnie breaks and runs out of the room.

The poor put upon servant is cleaning up the Montalvo apartment and all traces of "Having your Baby" has been removed. Aaron is talking on the phone to Ma, she has to hook up with Minnie and get her under control so she doesn’t out Aaron. After he hangs up, there is a knock at the door. Ah the bitch is back. Aaron smirks..he then yells several times for the servant to answer the door and when the lazy worthless servant who is no doubt hauling out bags full of hissy shards down to the dumpster doesn’t answer, poor put upon Aaron is forced to answer the door. It is young Dani. Aaron tries to tell her this isn’t a good time, but alas young Dani is not going to be put off. She has questions and when he says not now and it is none of her business; Dani fires back she is on the board and she will get answers. You can see Aaron would love to smack her and Dani stays right up in his face. She wants to see the papers MariAnna signed when she left the company. Dani feels the family has been lied to and the whole thing has not been on the up and up. Yes indeed Aaron just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse.

Rod, James and Crispin are congratulating the first class of the Tequila tasters, they go thru a look at the clarity of the product, the smelling of the product, and the tasting of the product..Hooray Hooray…they are going to bring excellence to the region. Rod does comment that the school was the dream and idea of MariAnne Franco, the whore who worked at the Mexico City office before she was forced to flee in disgrace (okay okay…really truly he said nice things about her).

Minnie is having a sit down in a restaurant with Fedra, poor Minnie like talking to Fedra is gonna help. Fedra tries to play down Aaron bad behavior. "Don’t you still love him?" she asks Minnie. Minnie just looks at Fedra with disbelief; she tells Fedra how angry she is with Aaron and how he is the only man she has ever loved, (gee maybe he was the only one brave enough to stick around the craziness). Now Minnie is doing that raising the voice in the restaurant. Minnie says that Aaron betrayed Bruno. Damn Minnie is going all vigilante. She is like one of those guys on the Sopranos, once you start singing, well there is only one way to stop you. Fedra tries to convince her to stick it out and she tip toes around the question of is Minnie barrin the Varron? Minnie, for the second time that day has a brief moment of joy when dropping the "Isa is pregnant with Rod’s baby". Fedra is muy impacted and "Artificial Insemination" is muttered. All the sudden Fedra looks like she lost her appetite, which is fine cause as BSC as Minnie is, Aaron is a by product of his bitch mother & her lack of morals. See in a TeleNovela for the most part you either get to be Rich and Evil or you get Morals and Stupidity. There is the occasional hybrid, like Dani, but this is a rare breed. Minnie no fool, well okay that is a moot point, knows Aaron will have some other woman instantly trying to bare the Varron.

Aaron calls Onate and tells him to cover up the MariAnna Franco investigation..Onate has like 5 million reasons to comply. He says he will falsify her signature on the release papers. Dani is speaking with Quintanna; when Onate comes in and gives her the papers. Onate gives the appearance of being Mr Helpful, Dani just snatches the papers out of his hand and leaves.

Gavi accidently runs into an older rich guy and after a brief conversation she tries to sell him some books. His children are all grown, well what about your grandchildren. Hmmmmm looks like he may buy some.

Dani leaves and runs into Margarita, she tells Margarita to call her Dani not senorita. Dani is a good person. She asks after Gavi and Margarita tells her she has not heard from Gavi and has no idea where she is.

Gavi returns to the office and tells her boss that she had two sales. Of course the one to the Catholic School is at a discount and they have six months to pay. Oh her boss is none too happy.

Rod, James and Crispin are all happy over the success of the school. Rod says he is bound for Mexico DF and tells James not to get married without him.

Over in Dry Gulch, Meliton is stumbling around the ranch grabbing his belly. He is moaning and groaning and Acacia is sitting on the front steps watching him. Meliton asks what was in the food, but she says it is the same as always and he smacks her before stumbling into the house. Acacia rubs her cheek and says that is the last time you will hit me.

Fedra goes to see Aaron. She is all flippant about the whole thing. She tells him Minnie is gonna spend the night at a Hotel, but he needs to play nice so Minnie won’t talk. Aaron asks if Minnie is pregnant and Fedra answers in her head. I think meaning Minnie is BSC. The Isa pregnancy comes up and Fedra mutters "Artificial Insemination", thru her fine teeth. Hee Hee Hee…I am so loving it. Aaron just wants to go to Miami (Pamela is standing by the pool and someone must go tell her to come in or she will eventually die out there).

Videgaray and Dani are looking over the documents, Videgaray says he does not believe that is Gavi’s signature. They call Margarita and invite her to have coffee. Margarita comes down and they explain they are only trying to help MariAnna. Margarita says that she doesn’t believe that is Gavi’s signature. They briefly explain how they are trying to get to the bottom of Aaron’s misdeeds and Margarita agrees to help. She tells them the name of Gavi’s hotel.

Gavi is at home, Clarita is all animated, but Gavi is tired after a long day of dragging books around. The phone rings. It is Videgaray. The conversation goes something like this.
M: Hola
V: MariAnna
M: Who is this?
V: It is Videgaray, I have some things I need to talk over with you.
M: Videgaray, I have nothing to say to you.

The End….

Oh no!!!!! Will Gavi once again turn away from help?
Looks like Rod walks in on Isa, getting ready to go out! Does he interrupt a clandestine Frankie meeting?
Cause Isa looks like she is thought bubbling, "Couldn’t he have waited one more day"
Rod is sitting on the sofa next to Sofie (I hope this is not the sofa of DNA, where many of Isa lovefests happened) Isa has tears and Rod is holding her hand. Oh Rod let go of her hand and quick reach up and try to deflect the anvil that is falling straight for your big head.

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