Caray, Caray!

Hello friends, I'm reassuming Wednesday night duties after not watching Destilando for more than three weeks. Have not even had time to read the recaps (owing to a sudden need to build a donkey fence and a chicken coop), and my son is leaving for college tomorrow so it's been a hurricane around here, AND I have a house guest - so feel free to correct/enlarge upon my rather sketchy remarks!

Rod's foot is twitching in bed - probably other parts of him are twitching too. Isa snaps that he's keeping her awake, he wants to talk about organic tequila but she, like everybody else in the entire world except James, is unwilling to listen.

Gav tells Clarita her new boss is more interested in a good cup of coffee than women. "Is he -- ?" "Oh, no Ma, he has a girlfriend though he might as well not, the way he stands her up all the time. And guess who showed up asking for a favor? Rod, he pretended he wanted info on organic tequila but it was just an excuse. He won't keep his promise, I hope they transfer me soon." That's Clarita's five seconds tonight.

In Miami, Aaron is ordering his mother to pressure Pammie into giving back his super-secret secret flash drive. "If it's so important you should ask her yourself." "No, you." Minerva enters and says he's playing into Pam's hands by letting her know how much he cares about this data. [But just think, if Aaron had stayed with Pammie, then Minnie would have blown the whistle on him, moral: If you're gonna play dirty, don't tell your women -- or don't have women. -- Ed.]

Minerva is off to the fertility specialist, she's gonna re-enter the baby stakes. Aaron hopefully asks: "Oh, you're going back to Houston?" "Don't you wish! No, I'm not gonna leave you all by your lonesome, there's a guy here in Miami."

James and Rod are chatting so happily on the phone about organic tequila. James snorts when he realizes Rod is planning to make extra-heavy use of the P.R. dept of the Tequila Board i.e. will be asking Mariana lotsa questions. Oh, sez James, gotta hang up, your sister and her hubby are here. "Take Francisco to see the 1-3 year old agaves, I will be wanting him to personally supervise the application of copper sulfite." I guess we can all guess how excited Frankie will be to hear this!

Adolescent PDA and lamby-kins sweetie poo talk between the newlyweds while James looks on. He then asks if Frankie would like to dash right out right this minute and inspect a few thousand agaves. "No, I want a bath first." James, who I guess has been living at the hacienda, says he'll clear out that very day. Sofia: "Oh, no, we don't mind your being here, do we hunnybuns?" Frankie's mouth says no but his eyes say yes he does mind.

Ofelia gets five seconds of screen time, she emotes: "Oh Sofia, it's so good to see you." "You too, now take our suitcases up and iron all Frankie's clothes because he likes to be impeccably dressed." Ofelia springs happily up the stairs to iron. James tells Sofia his wife isn't feeling too well (she's in the hospital raving insane, right?) but that he'll leave as soon as she's better.

Sofia bustles away to help Ofelia prepare Frankie's outfits.

What I gather has been going on around the office is that the new blond P.R. guy can't remember Mariana's name and he makes her work long hours as a lowly secretary, however he's noticing she is very efficient and speaks English.

A blond arrives, don't bother about her name, she won't last long. She's supposed to be Alonso's new secretary. He's indignant, he didn't know he HAD a new secretary, "que the hell?" "Didn't they tell you I, Mariana, was just helping you out temporarily?" "Dang, and just when you were learning to fetch properly, all my careful training wasted!" He yells and ignores the new girl.

Mariana rubs it in: "It's been nice working for you, and man have I learned a lot about making coffee, gee thanks, now I'm off to Guadalajara." Heh.

Rod calls. Again. He yells to hear Mariana's been transferred. Alonso yells too, it wasn't his idea. They butt horns and then whip out their mutual credentials and are abashed to have been yelling, respectively, at such august personages. Alonso, who hasn't been able to learn Mariana's name, is interested to hear Rod call her Gaviota and - inappropriately as always - rattle on about what a great gal she is.

The big boss tells Gav there will be people waiting for her in Guadalajara blah blah. They have a very friendly leave-taking. He'll miss her.

But wait, Alonso barges in complaining and pouts out his lower lip, nobody told him Mariana was temporary, he had great plans for her, she wasn't going to be making coffee much longer... he begs to keep her. While still forgetting her name, he raves about her capabilities and says the big boss shouldn't cave to the Montalvo harpies' caprices, and that he can handle them. "Cancel the transfer!"

Suzy liked Mariana when last I saw this show, but now she's gotten an earful from the three witches and thinks Mariana is evil. She calls Isa and tells her about the transfer, of course Isa is delighted and, of course, calls Sofia, who is, of course, likewise delighted and counsels, of course: "I recommend you stick with him, who knows what he'll do in his desperation, don't leave him alone for a moment!"

Rod gets no work done. Alonso has a bad combover. The new secretary, frightened off by the awful Alonso, and hearing she'll never have time for lunch dates, runs away forever. The big boss caves and lets Mariana stay, and gives her a promotion to assistant PR person, reminding her to keep her promise not to see Rodrigo. She gets a fancy new office. The big boss says it's he who is the big boss, not those Montalvo wives.

At Montalvo Corp, Elvira gets her five seconds of screen time being grilled by Isa: "Has my husband gotten suspicious phone calls? Bought airline tickets, had unexplained appointments? How's his mood, is he calm? Report on anything unusual." Elvira says Rod does in fact seem a little odd (like that's anything new). Odd Rod. I like Isa's new hairdo.

At headquarters, hearing about Gav's rehabilitation, Suzi grits her teeth. Alonso is happy: "Welcome again to the public relations department, Gaviota." "How did you know people call me that?" Well, Nancy comes in: "Engineer Montalvo's on the line." Alonso smiles and says she can take the call - she goes in the other room and tells Rod to quit meddling and they go over the same old ground, friends forever, not see each other, etc.

Isa enters and Rod ends the phone call abruptly. He asks if she drove herself and says that's dangerous, "But Rod, I'm not sick, just pregnant." He wants her to use the chauffeur. She wants to have lunch with him and then go look at baby toys. She thoughtbubbles: "I'll be your shadow, you won't fall into her clutches again."

James drones on about organic tequila farming and Frankie is transfixed with boredom, nay, confounded into catatonia, with all this talk of mold, fungus, copper sulfite, etc. He thought he could just stroll the fields in a leisurely fashion, from time to time, after naptime and a nice bath, wearing his fancy gangster outfits, whipping the farmhands and shagging the jimadoras. This hacienda thing is not what it was cracked up to be.

Gav is a little stunned when Alonso (drinking coffee again) tells her that they'll have to help Rod a lot, personally, with his organic project. She reminds him he has a lunch date with his girlfriend but he just drones right on, she thoughtbubbles: "That Cassandra has so much patience, he's left her planted and forgotten her so very many times!"

Meanwhile Cassandra, who is not only Alonso's purported girlfriend but also the raccoon-eyed ad agency lady who "discovered" Hilario, is drooling over his picture as well as those of miscellaneous other hunks. She muses to her assistant that the whole campaign hinges on the public identifying with the chosen model. Which should it be? She hopes Alonso won't forget their lunch date (heh), she wants his input. She wonders how Hilario would take to a complete change of career from "farmhand" to "professional preener and poser."

Hilario sits in a restaurant and tucks into a big plate of food. Wow, watch him tear up that tortilla and stuff it into his mouth, that's his five seconds tonight.

At the hacienda, an endless morning of tequila education has finally ended. James goes off to a business lunch, Frankie says he's lunching with his new wifey, they're practically still on their honeymoon. James strides off, annoyed.

Crispin, hanging about, is interested to see Frankie's driving Rod's ride. Frankie sez, it goes with my being master administrator.

Frankie watches some attractive rear ends go by, this causes Crispin to go off on an ecstatic monologue about the lowly but beautiful women of the area, all now called "Gaviotas" (nightingales) in honor of Rod's famed jimadora obsession.

Frankie hauls a flask of whiskey out of his pocket, shares swigs all round, they decide to go out to eat together and ogle dames and booze a bit. Frankie: "If my wife asks, I'll say I was "working" and you no-goodniks are my "personal assistants." Crispin and the other guy are down with that.

Sofia is home along, SanJuana asks if she wants something to eat. "No, I'm waiting for my husband." That's SanJuana's five seconds tonight.

James just can't let it go and bores yet another person with tales of tequila. Gav tells her whole story to Nancy.

At "Babies R Us," Rod goes gaga over toys and cribs. Isa derides the crib he likes, it's too feminine. He says he's assuming if it's a boy they'll call him Amador, she says of course not, they'll name him Ricardo after her father. "Well then, I get to choose the name if it's a girl, ok?" Isa snaps: "Will you choose Mariana or Gaviota?" Good going, sweetheart. Curb those impulses.

Tomorrow: Isa is mad that Gaviota is staying. Rod moons as usual. Nobody gets any work done.

Labels: Destilando