Caray, Caray!

I am your guest recapper today for Amanda. Feel free to join in the dissecting of buckets of slang used by Juan and his cohorts.

Opening scene, Paula and Ana in the kitchen. Paula's painted on tight jeans suggest it is Saturday. Mom Ana is leaving as usual. She wants to know how Paula's dinner with CL went. Paula wants to be self-righteous about confessing her feelings and her relations with Juan. She tells Mom, CL was, to her surprise (and secret glee) , impactada. She swears CL has really changed, he's not the man who broke my heart...tonta wake up... And she doesn't always want to be the villain (so what do seducing and bedding another woman's husband and leading an innocent like Juan down the garden path entitle you to be called, Miss Cantaloupes?)

The silvery-satin pajama'ed-to-go-with-his-hair and suave Cesár Luis slides to the door and opens it to the slinky Yvonne. He can't believe she got here so fast after his call. She can't believe she came at all, but. The two slide effortlessly to the bedroom where he immediately gives her a nudge, she slinks onto the bed. Sorry no time for foreplay, folks, they both know what they want and they want it now.

Paula & Ana carry on their continual banter but to be fair, Ana keeps repeating that she wants Paula to pick a better companion.

Nidia tells Juan that Paula called last night. Frustrated that he wasn't told right away, he wants to call her immediately, but Nidia advises him to rush to her like a Chihuahua (appropriate barking), she looks him up and down with her eyes-that-almost-touch and revises that to.... Saint Bernard (low lusty barking added).

CL and Yvonne loll in his sumptuous red sheets. She isn't dressed in anything but CL is still in his silver set (did he take it off or not bother). They are having a great "philosophical" discussion. Yvonne, smarter than she looks, wants to know why CL continues to pursue Paula when she the bonbon loves him so?

In a dizzying change of scenes of 30 seconds each: Paula is lounging in her pale green satin jammies reading "Amante" magazine dreams of CL's protestation of undying love (oh yeah) and Juan's sincere (and I believe him) words about her deserving a man who will respect and cherish and love her. She wakes with a start to thought bubble: why do I keep thinking of Juan now that I have CL acting the way I want....

Juan, in his manly undershirt and jammie bottoms wonders why he can't forget Paula. He seems to be in the grip of his love witch (m. warlock/sorcerer). Juan can't resist calling Paula to see why she called. She pretends it's was a car problem but when he offers to rush over to take her to get it fixed she acts simpering and says oh, tonta, I only ran out of gas. Even our ever pubescent Juan knows this is a crock. But she thanks him so sweetly for calling.

More robes: Nidia and two daughters are all in very nice, if too short to really warm, robes while poor Kiki is dressed to the nines ready to go to the church for his confirmation ceremony. They are all in a snit that he didn't give them warning but no way is he going alone. They disappear to dress.

Back to CL's bedroom, he is still in bed while the lovely Yvonne brings him a breakfast tray. She is in his shirt, he is still in the silver getup, reading a book. Philosophy-Part 2: Yvonne points out rather astutely that what CL feels for Paula is what she feels for CL, OBSESSION. He adds obsession fatale! Yvonne drives on, you don't really love Pau, you need her to reaffirm your manhood. The game is one of conquest. Once the conquistador has you, they make you suffer. and Paula's tactics are working You are hooked on Paula.

Switch to Paula who is looking glum, but supposes she will go out with CL later (Surely he will call..)

Lights go on in CL's head and he makes the most sexist remark weve heard yet from this totally macho hombre. He doesn't understand what women have in their head, IF they have anything (his snide smile is priceless) going on in them. But he suddenly thinks Yvonne's conquest and retreat strategy is brilliant. He has to make Paula know she doesn't have him completely conquered. So no fancy dinner for her this weekend...

Now Alirio in his jammies: nice subtle gray for a change from his usual nerdwear, whines at Nidia that she is leaving him while he is so sick and helpless. He recites the "in sickness and in health" chant from the wedding vows. She completes her go to church preparations and snears at him and his hypochondria. He swears he will starve. Nidia cites her Christian Duty to attend this confirmation and notes that Kiki is more a part of the family than Alirio is.
The threesome descend the stairs. Even sweet Juan worries about Alirio sick and starving. He will be eating rebanadas del aire (slices of air)

Paula stares at the phone, still in her robe. At Nidia's the phone rings and Marely answers: Paula suggest going to the cinema but Marely invites her to join them for the church and family dinner event. She declines saying she will probably talk with CL later... Juan thought bubbles in horror, she didn't even ask to speak to me...

At the church, Juan stands behind Kiki in the confirmation line of mostly children (Kiki is his ahijado=godson). The restaurant is a festive scene of dishes and platters everywhere with really delicious looking food and everyone devouring everything is sight.

Back at CL's Finally! they are dressed. CL is reading at the table while the servant like Yvonne is fixing yet another breakfast and a big one this time. The phone rings and it is dialing for dollars Paula, but CL ignores it. When Yvonne can't stand it, she lunges toward the phone with CL yelling malo, malo, NO! Yvonne is finally fed up and stomps out the door whacking CL with her purse. CL whines back, but aren't you going to finish fixing breakfast! (This scene is so funny but not easy for a feminista como yo). Paula is really obsessively calling now, but CL knows he has her. She later appears in one more robe with her wet hair and muses at a romantic couple exchanging flowers and kisses in the park below.

Conversation resumes at the restaurant with Yadi and Kiki carping at each other about eating like pigs, eating your own famly, etc. and Nidia coos that the two are acting like they are already husband and wife. Yadi is getting indigestion and cranky like usual and for some reason is tugging on a huge bowl of salsa with Nidia. Yadi wins the tug-o-war and the salsa is splashed right on Marely. For some miraculous reason it hits her lovely bare chest but not the white dress below. Juan offers his handkerchief and makes like he is going to dab at her lovely breasts. She leaves the table. He is near the restroom when she comes out and asks her what she is doing later. She beams at the hope he is asking her out but the goofball actually straight faced says he wants to see Paula later. (I think he wanted to have Marely call Paula or something that stupid). She says don't be two-faced (no seas mustio) Baboso, indeed. Nidia has a mother's six sense about these scenes and shows up to tell Juan he is a jerk and don't try to play innocent as Marely stamps off, hurt again by Juan's thoughtless disregard for her obvious love.

Another robe and jammie scene for Alirio as he complains about being the porter answering the door. In bursts Gutierrez (Gutis) on a cloud of cigar smoke with his all but bald head newly festooned with tendriles of hair brushed forward. A real work of art. He tells Alirio it looks like he just saw the grim reaper. He shouts at the stunned Alirio that he wants his money and he wants it now. He is out of jail to Alirio's unpleasant surprise and wants nothing of Alirio's crooked games. Alirio, of course, blames Pastor for his self denouncement and hems and haws, but Gutis is not interested and demands that if he doesn't have it, he better get it from his wife.

Yadi and Kiki have a silly argument in the truck about where they will live. He wants an simple honest life that they can afford but she screams that she will not live a life of penury but will stay right at home with the luxuries she is so in love with. Poor Kiki looks like the deer in the headlights.

Arriving home, Alirio gets tossed out of his bedroom and whines to Juan about his hunger. Juan grandly presents a huge bag that he had planned to bring Alirio which causes Alirio to first complain that he isn't the family dog to live on left overs from their lovely dinner. Then he thinks better of it and grabs the food which turns out to be huge and delicious. Juan questions how Nidia could afford such a luxurious dinner and Alirio says it is HIS money she does it with. Even Juan isn't dumb enough to fall for this.
Later Alirio begs Nidia for money to pay off his debt and stave off the threat from Gutis but she doesn't care about his threats anymore and says flatly, NO, she is finished with Gutis.

Final scene: a somber Paula gets in the car with Juan for a glum Monday ride to work. Juan brags about the fabulous family weekend and all the great food. Paula sulks and Juan realizes he has yearned for her honey kisses but no. Paula seems to realize that she now has two men that are not going to throw themselves at her feet.

Labels: Juan