Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Guapos 04-01-08 "Consti...on a scale"

I plan to rate Consti each and every week on a scale of one to ten..on RatBastardness.
Now currently I rate him a nine, cause I know he married Luci and gave Al a name, but Al thinks he is his Dad and he has berated the kid for twenty some years, that is RatBastard, he covered the Andrea pregnancy and let Mili think she kill a fetus, he is letting his daughter marry a crazy boy….and so on

Sorry I went to look up a few of the finer points of this stellar drama and Egads, I forgot to erase my DVR and alas no data, thus this is from memory, so feel free to throw in corrections…Except correcting my opinion of Consti, cause sorry I still rate him a nine on the scale of RatBastardness.

Well the first few were wasted on the stupid slap stick reboxing match. A scene of Andrea in bed…I’m thinking fully naked and Consti prancing and preening.

Now then we pick up with Mili and Hugo returning after a hard day of wedding planning.
Now I am forced to wonder why Mili always travels dressed as a boy? The story line isn’t holding my interest, so I am forced to explore other quirky aspects of the show. Seriously how many t-shirts does this chick have? Were they all donated from some “Help our Poor Brothers and Sisters South of the Border” used clothing drive at an American Catholic Church? Cause they are always in English, but not the “Cool” T-Shirts I spotted kids wearing in Mexico City. My husband has started commenting on it and he barely keeps who is who straight. I mean I get it if she was 12 or 14 and feeling uncomfortable with pubescent changes, but please she has no trouble showing some leg at the Rodeo. I just don’t get the dressing like that when she goes to talk to people about the wedding. Gloria and Lina dress fine when they are off work. I gotta stop obsessing over bad fashion.

Al stays past Val the insipid, and tells him she has to quit pitting the two boys, Rocky & Bobby against each other, cause it will be really hard to replace those two with two other equally clueless, yet willing to perform inane slapstick acts. Val totally blows him off. How can you be that rich and that bored?

Anyway as they stand in front of the mansion, and Hugo is telling how he will buy them a house and groovy furniture, cause he has an inheritance from his mother.
I am thrilled as that one lame ass painting of naked dead girlfriend with new girlfriend’s head stuck on dead girlfriend’s body; probably isn’t gonna keep Mili in size x-large t-shirts.
Al creeps up with that smirky look on his face. He needs to talk to his Cuz a la Solo. This works to Hugo’s advantage as Mili gives Hugo a big kiss and manages not to wipe her mouth off. She goes into the mansion to dream of Hugo, would someone please rent the Spanish Version of Psycho and let her watch it.
Now then Al forces Hugo to agree to meet him at the “Office of No Work is ever done” the following day, to confront Andrea about the “Swan Dive of Miscarriage”, lie.

Meanwhile, Rocky is walking past Val, who acts all surprised when she sees him holding a piece of steak to his eye. Oh, Morgan if you are the winner, I will be yours totally.

Five seconds later she repeats the same nonsense to Bobby…

Back to the boys out on the Tennis Court shadow boxing as Horacio looks on. He finally says let’s settle this like men, in a bar. Awesome…the promise of more hijinks.

Mili goes upstairs to see Granny, who is in satin pj’s, I believe the shade to be “CK depression Grey”. She was all alone while Mili traveled the merry streets of Mexico City, macking on getting her boda set up. Jeez, Granny has the guilt cranker set on high. Don’t leave me Mili, you are the only one who comes to see me, my son hates me and will never forgive me for screwing up his life, plus I’ll never get to see my poor abandoned bastard grandchild. Mili says Granny needs to try and sleep. Granny has that base covered, she has taken sleeping pills and they aren’t working. (Does this give us some insight into her whining deep depression? A barbiturate overdose? Mili says she will stay with the Granster and tucks her in and then climbs up on the bed next to her and cranks out a lullaby to lull Granny to sleep.

Downstairs, Luci has returned from of hard day of cuckolding Consti. I gotta say I like this side of Luci. Consti falls all over himself patronizing Nestor. Nestor is all like, no seriously, the pleasure was all mine. Nestor is off to Europe for a few days, but he will be back and they can all get together then. Hee Hee Hee

Now over to the Bar, Horacio is plying the boys with Tequila, I’m having a Destilando flashback, but thank all the angels in heaven, that neither one of them start crying and lamenting “The Gull”. They pass out in simocast.

Now we are back at the Mansion, it late, we hear Marachi singers.
Down on the lawn, the Marachi are cranking out a tune for Val, Rocky, Bobby, Horacio and the rest of the Nacettes are singing back-up. In case you were wondering we get to see Damien and Karla dancing the horizontal Mambo, Karla queries the music, but Damien says something strange is always going on in that house.
Consti is complaining about the noise and Luci is purring from her prior encounter with Nestor. Hmmm Consti is a back sleeper you’d think he’d realize he’d been horned, Ah Cabron.
Mili and Hugo are out romantically hugging as the singing continues, Al is down there too, laughing until he sees Mili and Hugo kiss, that’s it, he does the five year old stiff leg stomp as he goes back to the house. Now the lil Princess, that all this display is trying to impress; is lying in bed with her ipod. Yep she misses the whole thing, but do not lament cause we are privy to her fantasy about Bobby dressed as maybe one of the Three Musketeers sword fighting with Morgan dressed as Zorro. She and her two model friends are dressed in left over Pasion Gowns. TelVista is so green, what great recyclers. The costumes are a clue to this being only a fantasy, but the biggest clue is that the two friends aren’t rolling their eyes behind her back. Both boys fall to the ground. OH NO….Val can’t choose between them…..
Back to the singing on the lawn, the boys are woozy…..

Hitchcock…fade-out

It is the next day.
Mili goes in to see the Patron and begs him to talk to his mother, she will die and she is so upset, she loves him so much and only begs his forgiveness. Consti, tears up. I realize a lot of you feel sorry for him when he tears up over his lil Nina, but sorry I still think he is a RatBastard. Like yeah I could acknowledge my kid, but hey who’d dust the living room? Anyway, Mili has this strange bond with Pa and he listens to her.

Now up in Granny’s room she is sitting on her bed and Lawyer guy Nestor from Destilando is on the bed next to her. Can it be? Of course not. Mili come in and seems a bit embarrassed, Granny kind of giggles, pleased that someone would think she could still rock someone’s world. Oh, let me introduce you, this is my lawyer, I’m cutting my will. Mili is like so that is what the seniors are calling it. She says she will come back later. Granny says no stay and she proceeds to say she has named Mili in her will and not just for some crappy lamp or uber lame ass poetry book, she is getting 25% of Granny’s bucks. Mili is muy muy muy impacted. Just think how impacted the rest of the clan is going to be. Lawyer guy leaves and for once Mili is cordial and actually shakes his hand. Once Lawyer splits, she starts yelling at Granny. She doesn’t need nor want the money. Too freakin bad cause Granny isn’t giving in. Mili is better to her than her worthless family, Jeez Granny wouldn’t that entitle the rest of the 20 million people in Mexico City for a piece of the pie. Oh after all these years the bar is soooooooo low.

Enter Consti stage left, he hears Mili calling his Ma, Granny and he has that stricken look, he so often has when he thinks the Bastard info is out, the one where he looks like he is going to puke. He catches on that it is just a term of endearment between Mili & Ma. Swallowing down the bile, he gets the news that Mili is getting a quarter of the pie. Egads…Mili exits stage left. He tells Ma how much he loves her and how much he doesn’t blame her that his life sucks. How it wasn’t her fault that he married for money, screwed over his “True Love”, wasn’t Rosario fortunate to hold that special place in his heart? Granny thinks that Consti is pissed cause she is cutting Mili in for a piece of famial pie. No, it is your money and it is to do with whatever you wish, I love you and I don’t blame you for anything.

----Okay readers let out a collective sigh of Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, sniff, sniff-------------
Now let me throw some muy fria agua on this, I think a bit of guilt was just lifted off Consti, now his bastard kid is taken care of and he didn’t have to lift a hand.

Hugo shows up at Andrea’s. He tells her that she has to cover for him with Al, she agrees.
Oh lil dreamer, that so isn’t going to happen.

Now Val wanders the yard and stumbles over passed out Rocky and Morgan, she screams Morgan. The boys jump up and start talking about the Marachi’s. Val can smell the alcohol. Rocky and Bobby are hanging with their story like brothers. Is it wrong for me to wish they would realize they have more in common than just Val and totally come out? Anyway, now the lil Princess sets a new task for the boyz, they must dazzle her with dancing.

Some conversation about this is continued with Horacio, Grocery Delivery Don Juan and so on…but I don’t have a clue what the next Val deflowing move will be.

Meanwhile over at the office Consti gets some letter, I guess he was trying to join a fraternity or something..sorry viewer, I missed what the hell it was about, all I know is he was blackballed, but Al, the Bastard was excepted. Andrea and Damien smirk. Poor Consti, never good enough. When push comes to shove seems like everyone rather party with Al.

Now Mili shows up at the office, she and Andrea trade barbs, then she asks to speak to Consti.
When she goes in his office of “No work ever done”, he starts yelling at her about being a gold digging little snot, he will break the will. Mili is all back in his face.

Exit Mili stage left…
Consti has a loving look of my little spitfire.

Mili runs into Hugo and Al. Al grabs her and thrusts her in front of Andrea. He tells Andrea to tell Mili the truth, how the whole idea was Hugos. Andrea says, while the fake preg was her idea, the staircase drama was all Norman Bates, oooops sorry Hugo’s idea, it was paint not blood. Hugo is crying and saying No don’t believe her, Mili is wailing, she tells Hugo she hates him. Al tries to comfort her, but she pulls away. Finally Consti gets up off his big leather chair and comes out. What the hell? Mili runs over and hugs him and he takes her in the office. Hugo and Al look UBER concerned, of course they don’t know he is her father and I am sure I can guess what they are thinking…Oh please, like they would be far off the mark?

Consti calms her down and she knows he isn’t her Pa, but gee it is such a comfort to talk to him, it is almost like she can talk to her DAD, except her real DAD is a RatBastard, well Mili the sixth sense. Anyhow he tells her calm down and go home.

Mili returns to the lobby and Damien has crawled out of his hole. He completely backs up Hugo and to the joy of psychotics everywhere Mili says sorry Hugo, forgive me.
Looks like the Boda is on….

I know I totally skimmed this, but talk amongst yourselves and feel free to add.

Now then folks…
Tomorrow night it looks like Consti tells the fraternity (whatever) that Al is an addict…an addict to pharmaceuticals, Hmmm I wonder if he knows about Granny’s stash?

And friends that is why Consti remains a NINE on my scale of RatBastardness.

Labels:


Comments:
Well, I've got mush for brains so I fold when Consti is nice to Mili, but of course then he turns right around and does something vile, like accusing his son of drug abuse to invalidate him for (I think) the honor of builder of the year or some such thing. I believe (although I watched this half asleep) that this was some sort of business honor thing awarded to the best contractor/builder and Alejandro, rather than Consti, was one of the nominees.
If I'm wrong, correct me fellow bloggers.
 

Thank you for your wry sense of humor.

As to Consti, I hope he gives us all one big fat good reason for not divulging that Mili is his daughter. Most of the family knows already - Luci, Hugo, Damian and nonfamily big-time troublemaker Andrea. It's also possible that Karla knows, since she knows everything about everyone.

As to the "fight" between Morgan and Bobby - well, I guess the producers had to fill the time slot with something, so they came up with this stupid plot twist.

Hugo - you're a real jerk. You don't deserve Mili. Crying on daddy's shoulder in public - for pete's sake give us a break.

From lower Ala
 

Geez, you guys are right--Connie is up to a 9 or 10--he acted horribly last night. Hugo's crying was pathetic. I'm confused as to what Alex was nominated for--membership in a society?
 

P.S. on costumes. You're right, Beckster, that it doesn't make sense that she is wearing the boyish gear all the time, but like LFMB, it seems they come up with a "uniform" for each character, and that character wears variations of it for the entire run. I recall someone saying last year that this was a convention of the novela form.
 

Sounds like i missed some funny things last night, i didnt watch i was couldnt get myself off the computer for the 6 hours that i was on. By the time i was watching tv , Cami in Pasion was talking to a lady who was rolling out a carpet in her new dorm,
I still dont get this show,
I did my research on the plot summaries but beyond its makeing no scence. From my veiw its like little orphan Annie in the twsited household.
Val is acting like dumb blonde she could be out modeling, studying,acting but she chooses to sit home and bat out on everyone like shes a little princess.
Question,
Is Valida related to Mili?
Thanks for the funny recap,
Im guessing no ones takeing on that Fuego show,
Oh well thought u all would since it seems to be a hit,
 

Emilee
Yes Val is Mili's half sister as Consti is the father of both, Al is not related as he is portraying the son of Consti, they have passed him off as the spawn of BSC French dead guy, but I think he may be the spawn of Nestor (the guy currently boinking Luci, behind Consti's back)

As to Fuego, I have snorted thru the commercials..it looks like the Ed Yanez character is yet another by product of raised by the church..as we have the flashbacks of the "I'm Preg"
 

Thanks, Beckster, for another laugh-fest. The Nacettes – what a hoot!

I was thinking that the announcement that upset Connie was the roster of nominees for the party election, but I couldn’t figure out how Alex could be on that list since nobody had met or courted him. Maybe Nestor was impressed with what he saw when Mili pulled the towel off of him earlier. Connie said it was all Damien’s fault which would go with the law proposal fiasco, and, too, Andrea was smirking, which would fit.

One part I liked was when Mili was telling Granny that she didn’t want the money, she said that everyone in the house is unhappy, so what good is money?

I had the impression from the Granny/Connie little talk that Granny felt guilty that she hadn’t tried harder to dissuade him from marrying Luci, so maybe it was partly her fault that he went the way he did. Still, I didn’t re-run any of that to make sure…

I liked the Hugo actor’s performance when Andrea was accusing him in front of everyone of being behind the whole fake-baby scheme. He did look like his whole world had crumbled. I was surprised they busted Andrea so quickly – I thought that would go on for several episodes before she was outed.
 

I think Melinama will probably be arranging for someone to recap Fuego when it starts. She will probably be soliciting people to do it soon.

Pasion has gotten better lately. I had given up on it as too confusing, but I am tuning in for the last few weeks.

Beckster, you said you liked seeing Luci have some fun with Nestor at Connie's expense. I'd be with you there if I could find anything the least bit attractive about Nestor. He is not my cup of Nestea.
 

I like pasions to, Since i didnt watch it much i wont go insulting the blind lady (out of all villans a blind one) and well i have to say i dont usaly like old shows back in the days u know wagons and candles,no electric,
Best way I catch up on shows is by looking ahead on what shows are comeing and find there remakes. I also find them by watch bit of them on Hoy,
I also look forward to the next comdy show months away in june said to be at 7:00pm i bealive is Las Tontas No Van al Cielo. Its the only summary so far i actuely like lol.
Thanks for awnsering the burning question.
 

Thanks for the recap,Beckster
I'm confused. I think there were 2 exchanges between Consti and Mili at the office. The 1st was a loud exchange between the 2 in his office . Was it about the money Regina was leaving her? I was just too tired to get it. The 2nd, was when he was consoling Mili after the Hugo/Andrea/Al show down.

After seeing Hugo balling his eyes out on his daddy's shoulder - please Mili run for hills. That was really disgusting. He is soooooo creepy.

Miranda
Miranda
 

Hello there!, fellow viewers, I have a question. In the previews for tonight, Al confronts and grabs Consti at the mansion - Does Al do this because of Consti lying about the drug abuse that supposedly Al has or about something Consti says to Mili? I didn't get this part. I also agreed that Consti is a 9 or more on the RAT meter scale. Whenever he does these evil or mean things I just hope he pays for it BIG TIME.
 

Connie is likely to pay for being nasty when Mili rejects him as she is sure to do. She is truly the child of his heart and he shows it each time they have a conversation. I think in addition to his fear of letting everyone know is that he is secretly afraid that she means it when she says she hates her father.

There were two conversations between them last night, the first about Regina feeling so low after her bad dream and the second when he consoled her after the shouting match in the office with the skank, blubbering Hugo and Al.

Connie had hoped to be nominated for businessman of the year after having not won in the last couple of years but Al got nominated as the best young executive. That set off the drug allegations (which I completely missed).

Bobby and Morgan should be careful of what they wish for since who ever were to get Snotty Spice now would be saddled with a self centered whining shrew.

For all her naco behavior Mili certainly has more brains than her empty headed sister. She see clearly that with all the money in the world the people in the big house are all totally miserable. Poor dumb Karla thinks money is the answer to everything but Mili who will be worth bundles of of the stuff knows the difference.
 

Hugo is so creepy because he looks like a Latin Michael Jackson! Great show and love all the recaps, good job everyone!
 

John, that is hilarious! And you are absolutely right!
 

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