Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Guapos 09-09-08 "In the Jungle the Mighty Jungle Consti Sleeps Tonight"

Tonite plus one and I am done…..
Sorry..
Also will someone tag this for me as I can't
Thanks

Okay we open with Ros telling the good Padre, that yes indeed she is the mother of Mili and not a Fembot.
She confesses her deep and abiding hatred for Consti, the RatBastard.
--Why doesn’t the Padre just put up one of those take a number things—
Anyway that is why she can’t tell Mili that she is her Mother. A stretch yeah well, this is the best that Miss Sanchez’s eight grade class could come up with.
The Padre wants to discuss, but Ros doesn’t have time, she says they can discuss it another day when she is calmer.
Has anyone on this show ever taken any advice from the PreSaints?
Oh well thanks for teaching Mili Futbol and helping her in her life.

Maybe Ros would have thought better if she had seen “The Naca Phase”

Now back to Mili telling Pa to be careful. She gives him no details. Just be careful.

Mili arrives at the new house, the posse is there. Al questions Mili where she went after the game.
She says she will tell him later.
On to a fest of the Chicas explaining to the Chicos, how they are going to start this awesome Spa, with dance, food, aroma therapy, masques, hydrotherapy…Whatever

They want the boys to build in for them. Not for free, but for a good discount. Bobby, Al & Rocky huddle.
DA-Da of course they will. These young folks are so metrosexual..

Meanwhile, Damien is over at Ros’s, he is selling her 60% of the company for mucho dinero. The contract will be signed tomorrow. Now the thought of screwing Consti over has Damien thinking of screwing Ros. Really you can’t blame him, I’ve decided it is some subconscious thing with these people. You know how you like smell something and all the sudden you have a memory from like forty years ago surface? It is like that with these guys, all the sudden the entire male group is aroused when any woman that one has done enters the room. There is a certain industrial strength cleaning product that anytime I smell it, straight back to elementary school when the janitor had to clean vomit. Sorry…

Anyway Damien is pouring on the let’s get busy thing. Ros squashes the idea. She says she just couldn’t cause he reminds her of her Father. Damien is truly appalled he counters with a maybe an older brother, but father no way. Nope he reminds her of her father. OH SNAP. She does not mix business with pleasure, so that is that. Damien will return the next day to seal the deal…not that deal, the real contract.

Hugo, the carefree dreadlock man, is at the Bar of Pole Dancing. It is so sad cause Hugo is pretty cool as dreadlock guy, much more so than when he is Hugo the Preppy stalker.
He purchases Karla’s time. She comes over to the table while wearing her servant outfit. She tells him he could spend his money elsewhere and get a private dance. Nope he just wants to talk to her. She is drinking a Virgin (no alcohol drink), he questions that and she says she doesn’t want to drink.
He tries to chat her up a bit, tell me a little about yourself. She says she is selfish, cares only about money, hates her mother and is just out for money.

Jeez Karla hold back a little, what the hell will you two talk about on the honeymoon. Karla gets up and walks off.

Damien has arrived at the Mansion of Tragedy. He and Andrea are in the study. Andrea wants all the details about selling off the company. Damien true to form can’t answer. Instead he starts asking how old she thinks he is. Fifty she tells him. Poor Damien, he gets no respect. Anyway to cut through all the nonsense, he says they are good to go and he will go back tomorrow and get the check. Damien then tries to get a little action with Andrea. She puts him off. They can’t Consti is in the house. How has this not turned into a threesome? Of course Damien would always be second, but Que the Hell, I am so sure he is used to it. Andrea leaves and Damien thinks he better get a move on, cause tomorrow he is going to look another day older.

After the little party, Mili tells Al that she went to see Consti, she knows he is a ratbastard who has screwed over everyone, but he is her RatBastard.

Al gets on the phone and has a conversation with Pa. We don’t know which Pa, but he goes to see him.

Over at Ros’s apartment, jeez is that décor left over from some 70’s TeleNovela? Anyway Perleta has come to see Ros. He is trying to get her to meet with Consti, he tells her Consti will give her a much better deal. No Ros is not interested, not now not ever. She basically kicks Perleta out.

Al meets with Nestor. Now Al is a little warmer with Nestor. He tells him that Ros wants to crush Consti, that she has some deep abiding hate for Consti. Al doesn’t know why as he just generally assumes that everyone hates Const. Nestor says well you thought of him as a father. Al says, he was never proud of me, he never acknowledged any accomplishment, he tortured both my mother and my self, and never treated Mili as his daughter.

Well Nestor, the Hallmark Greeting Card of Honesty, tells Al. I can’t tell you what to do, but you must live with your actions. Al says if he does it, he will be just like Consti. Nestor says he will help him and direct clients his direction. “Oh Al at Least you’ll have your dignity”.

Back at the departmento of bad taste, Ros is talking to Brau. She tells him how she met Luci. The woman who stole Consti from her. Brau says, Consti didn’t marry her for love, he married her for money and yes like everything Consti touches, he turned her life to crap. Damn you Consti Belmonte. On the lighter side Ros fixes up a “Date” with Brau & Pablo. Pablo is a much better choice that guy at the bar, the short fat bar owner.

Damien has shown up at the Pole Dancing Palace. I swear those are the worst pole dancers evah. Have these people never seen the Sorpranos? Available on DVD, now those Bada Bing Chicks could twirl on the pole even when they were all crack whore high.

Damien always a class act, starts yelling Servant at Karla. He seems to think he is going to get some for ol times sake. He grabs her, jeez the Naco is so coming out in Damien. She screams at him to let her go. These folks are putting on quite the floor show. Hugo in full dreadlock, jumps up and punches Damien out.
He bends down and says, “Sorry Papa, but you were asking for it”.

Damien gets thrown out, and old guy isn’t gonna get any tonight.

Karla is all like, my hero. Hugo tells her he will be back tomorrow night to talk with her. Karla says I will talk to you for free, you won’t even have to pay. Oh my little Karla, you crazy romantic.

Next day…

Perleta is telling Consti that he failed, Ros won’t sign with Consti. Consti is enraged, he demands Perleta fix this, Perleta says Ros was especially impressed with Al. Consti has the enraged how can that be? How? No contract no kickback.
--I saw the same look on the old lions face when he was about to loose the harem to the young stud lion—
Animal Planet. Dude you are so going to get a bad bite and die of a serious infection under the hot sun on the Seringeti and the hyenas Andrea and Damien circle his ever weakening body…Finally stripping the flesh off his still breathing body.---Too Graphic? Hope springs eternal.—

Okay now let’s stroll over to the departmento. Ros is putting on her wig and so on. Knock at the door, it is Al. He tells her she wants to destroy Consti, he says he can’t do that cause it would make him just as bad as Consti. Ros can’t use him to seek vengeance. He tears up the contract and turns to walk away.
Ros says, “Could you do it with Mili’s Ma”.
Al turns, she pulls off her wig and tosses that skanky hair. Al does the it can’t be. Yes it can, to make another hash/rehash short…blah, blah, blah…
Oh the pain, oh the despair—
Oh yeah I know Luci and know Const screwed her over too.
People get started on the RatBastardness of Consti and it is like instant bonding, it’s like best friends for life---four hours later and someone is saying, “yeah well you think that is bad, let me tell you about when he did this_____” You know kinda like when people start spouting Bushisms and everyone joins in and you just can’t stop.
Well future son-in-law and mother-in-law make up and the deal is on.

Over in the office of old guy lawyer, the gramps of Matt the Ratt, second runner-up for Homecoming Queen Cell bock six, Luci, Val & Mili are talking about using the inheritance money to start a business.

Nestor comes in, he stares as Luci, she stares back thinking, “So that is what he looks like”. It was hard to really focus on his features when always seeing them through the bottom of a whiskey tumbler.

Nestor you sly dawg, he tells her how good she looks. Compliments all round. He asks her to go for coffee, she demures, the little ingenue. She has a meeting. Our group of cupids send them on their way.

Okay the end…

Next Damien is giving Consti the 411 that he thinks Ros is banging Al…
Egads, the Lion is muy impacted.

I would like to take this time moment to inquire…
1) WTF is up with Perleta? Now it looks like he is on Consti’s payroll, when from the beginning he had plans to make Consti take the fall for some unknown convoluted business thing? Miss Sanchez did we just drop that theme?
2) Dead French Guy, not Daddy. WTF, that certainly had no repercussions, shouldn’t Luci at least have to say sorry to the Juan Doe gravesite? I mean isn’t it part of the 12 step program? Or maybe it is a step that is like A) Apologize to Crazy Dead French Guy or B) open a swanky spa for rich substance abusing middle-age women. La Bety Belemonte Clinica

Labels:


Comments:
Hey Beckster, Great Recap and I just tagged it for you. Love the title. This TN has slowly grown on me. I am sorry I will miss the last week of it.
 

Beckster, thanks for hanging in there and providing us with another great recap. Yes, only one more to go for you!

I don't mean to rain on your boyfriend Damien's parade (oh, who am I kidding--of course I do), but when Hugo punched him out it was one of my top five moments in this show. I join you in saluting Homeless Hugo. He looks totally hot from the neck down. Where were they hiding him all this time?

Looks like they are whipping up a last-minute real love story between Karla and Hugo. All the bad guys are redeeming themselves faster than double coupon day at the Super Stop and Shop.

Loved Rosella's dramatic wig pull. I wonder how she managed not to pull off the second wig at the same time. I hope Al does not get caught in a trap with her, but I imagine all will come out okay.

I was watching without captions, but I think when they were discussing the inheritance with Robledo, they were thinking they had to get Mili's money back from Connie because it had reverted to him after she moved out of the house. Is that correct?

Cheryl, why are you going to miss this? You must record or watch on Youtube.
 

Funny and well-written as alwasy Beckster. I have to close my eyes when Mili Madre is in her apartment. The garish colors, along with her garish haircolor, tacky outfits and "do-me shoes" are too much.

Basically the colors of her apartment are like the colors in the skanky pole-dancing bar...just without the cigarette smoke. When she's talking to Luciana, Luci looks classy and Rosario looks....well, NOT. Wish they had kept the other actress in this part.
 

Beckster: Thanks for your interesting spin on this story. More later - have to work
 

ninak--
yeah I do remember something said about the house at the lawyer's office, and some lets smirk about Consti, but my eyes just glazed over because, it is a moot point, we all know "the mujers" are going to be a huge success, and Mili won't lose a thing. This is just more crap thrown in at the end
 

Thanks Beckster! I think Peralta is for whatever seems to be in his best interest at the moment, so his plans change daily.

I watch without captions and my Spanish is lacking, but my impression of the discussion between Robledo and the girls was that although Mili was in violation of the terms of the Will by not living in the mansion, Constancio probably wouldn't fight her having access to her inheritance.
 

Rhonda you are right about that conversation in Robledo's office. We all know that Demon Damian is not going to get away with his latest dirty trick. Unfortunately I know what happens to Damian and Beckster won't like it (don't worry he lives) but he gets what is coming to him.

I dislike Ros more every day. I've never found a relentless drive for revenge to be attractive, especially in a woman and she is going at it guns blazing without all of the facts. She of course does not know that Mili has come to care for Connie and her loyalty is going to be for him. I am curious to see how Mili will react when she finds out Mommy didn't die of a broken heart but shipped off to Italy and lived the good life, WITHOUT ever trying to get in touch with her supposedly much loved brother Brau.

I'm having serious doubts about watching the next show. A synopsis makes it look like it is treading way to close to the guapos lost child scenario. It has a pretty good cast and the story is written by one of Noveleland's legendary writers but I think I have a case of bored with lost child syndrome and think I'm going to wait for Jamie's Tontos to get involved again.
 

Yeah, the ladies were basically like, don't worry, he will agree to let us have the money.

I agree about HotHomelessHugo...other than the excessive hair, he's got it going on. Did he always have those arms? And I do always love seeing Damian denied.

Beckster, I always love your recaps. Your perspective is always refreshing. Can't wait to see your take on Fuego.
 

Fun as always, Beckster! What a wild imagination you have!

Though I was bummed to hear the pole dancing isn’t very good. I’ve never seen pole dancing before and here I was thinking how educational these novelas are, first I learned all about tequila production and now I get to see some pole dancing.

Poor Damien hearing from Andrea that he looks even older in the mornings.

I wish the director hadn’t chosen for Braulio and Paolo to look so simpy with one another. Gay guys watching thoses scenes must be gnashing their teeth at the depiction.

I’m not liking Rosario either. She’s plenty effective at playing mean and maybe some of you who have seen her before can tell us if she’s ever played antagonistas in the past, ‘cause it seems like she’d be really good at it.
 

Oh, and about Cuidado – I too am bummed that it’s not Tontas. But I’ll go pretty much with any story as long as the acting is good, since I’m in it for the Spanish lesson. I’m cheered to hear that it has a good writer and good actors
 

They can't do proper pole dancing because the pole is weak and wobbly and would fall right over if they tried to use it to effect. (This is not an innuendo.) In one shot, they showed that it is not attached to the ceiling, which it must be to work. I notice these things.
 

"Damien then tries to get a little action with Andrea. She puts him off. They can’t Consti is in the house. How has this not turned into a threesome? Of course Damien would always be second, but Que the Hell, I am so sure he is used to it. Andrea leaves and Damien thinks he better get a move on, cause tomorrow he is going to look another day older." Beckster, it was an almost impossible choice but if I had to pick my favorite lines from your outstanding recap, it would be these.
Most of the plotlines seem to be wrapping up (with a few glitches), but am wondering why we haven't seen or heard anything from or about Florencia or Rigoberto. Doesn't Al have to divorce her before he marries Mili or have I missed it? I keep waiting to see if Florencia has a change of heart (about the baby and/or Alex) and wonder if she will show up before the end. Diana in MA
 

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