Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Fuego, Wed., Oct. 29: Avoiding 7-10 in the state pen.--without Court time and processing fees.

Buenas noches a todos.

Sofia’s barely swaggering along as she leans on the walls of Brigadoom for shoulders to cry on. It's pretty sad when your only friends are brick walls and lace handkerchiefs. Sofia! Get your ass in gear, girl. Didn’t you know that you’re the talk of the town? So embarrassing. I'd be embarrassed, too, if my daughter resembled the center-fold from the 1852 Farmer's Almanac. What do you expect, mother, Juan just told me that he never loved/knew me. I guess I put myself through all this pain and suffering, and I sure deserve it, I deserve it all. I’d say she’s at a breaking point, but her whole life has been a breaking point. Gabi’s amused by Sofia’s own sense of worthlessness and says to herself; now I only have to knock off Oscar and Franco, just like I knocked off their daddy. Just like their daddy knocked her up, and then probably knocked her around…

You know, this whole “Barrancas” thing they have going on looks more like a spa getaway than a primitive, former witch-craft haven. For instance, the private “suites” are lined up in a row, there are light fixtures, people are reading, and there’s live entertainment nearly every evening. Speaking of a freak show; Oscar and Franco pay a visit to the mayor/concierge. Here, the guy tells the boys that he’s sure that Juan came to the village without a brain in his head or a hope in his heart, and he’s willing to testify that to a judge. That will certainly contrast the former Juan to the new one.

Juan lies in his prison bunk trying desperately to remember what he ate for dinner, but it’s just not coming to him. Suddenly a flashback of that fateful rainy night in which he fell off the giant waterfall appears in his head. Just then Fernie raises his head to the camera, but Juan almost falls out of his bunk and is awoken. I remembered! I remembered! Juan looks to the ever-full moon for an answer. No answer. Who was that man? Damn it!

Babe Doctor (does she have a name?) makes an unauthorized visit to Sofia’s house. She wants to talk about Juan, but Sofia tells her to butt the hell out because she doesn’t talk about her personal life, if that’s what you can call the fiasco she leads, with girls who are prettier than her, or girls who shacked up with the man she rolled around in the hay with. All animosity aside, Babe Doctor tells Sofia that she shouldn’t get her panties in a twist because if Juan says he didn’t steal her kid, than he didn’t steal her. After all, she loved/lived with the guy for over a year, or so I hear (which amazes me to this day). What’s more, the Babe Doctor used to hear him say “mi niña” in his sleep, which obviously means he loves Sofia.

So the police chief, who’s supposed to be the guy who pulls some illegal strings so that Juan can stick around, tells Juan it’s off to the big house. Well, city life will certainly to Juan some good; he’ll have access to indoor plumbing, radios, razors, and what’s more, he can shower and be naked with all the naked men his little heart desires.

Basically Sofia continues with the frigid-bitch routine and Babe (I renamed her) desperately beats a dead, black horse. Sofia’s never going to forgive Juan, and Juan’s never going to rest, so I guess both will be miserable.

The drums beat and Juan is marched down the jail corridor where two inmates say that they are sure that Fernie is behind all this (thank you, Captain Obvious). What warms my heart most is the protest group that Quinti has organized outside the jail house. Quinti, please let the guy do his job; voting for someone’s innocence is not democracy in action. Not so fast! Enter Oscar and Franco on horseback. You will not take my brother! The crowd goes wild. Then arrives the mayor of the Barrancas. Juan is innocent, I should know because I know his soul. I knew that place was just a front for other sorts of behavior. Well, it just goes to show you that if you assemble a crowd, gather testimonies from lovers and family members, and yell louder than the guy in charge, you, too, can avoid 7-10 in the state pen.—without court time and processing fees.

Dr. Nestor (I renamed him, too) visits Sofia to try to convince her that Juan is innocent. The thing I don’t understand is why everyone is so excited about visiting Sofia and saving her relationship with Juan. She’s a bitch, and Juan’s a moron; I guess they do have a certain trashy appeal, but save it for reality television. If it’s any consolation, my daughter said that Juan never made a pass at her, and she always had to light the flame between the two. But how do you explain Juan’s saying that he doesn’t know who I am? Oh my God; I watch this show once a week, and I even know that he has/had amnesia. Sofia reflects for a second and then realizes that Juan has never lied. Now she’s the one with amnesia because she forgot about the time he lied about getting revenge on her and her family, or the time he said Libia was his pet flower.

So all’s well that end’s well, or at least that’s the general consensus over at police headquarters. The mayor’s touching statement mixed with Oscar’s “yeahs” and “that’s rights” let Juan off the hook. But don’t get any ideas, the sheriff was just doing his job; no one in Mexico can go to prison unless it is completely certain that they are guilty. Bull Shit! The real law is: guilty until proven innocent. Stop trying to rewrite the legal system, FELS producers.

Fernie slithers in and wants to know why Juan is free. Juan tells him that he knows him from a dream, but doesn’t quite know who he is. Anyway, he still feels a natural urge to get up in his face and yell. After Fernie slipped the sheriff a few Benjamins he changed his mind, and wants Juan back behind bars. Of course, Sofia stops by the jail, and now she’s not so sure that Juan was responsible for anything. Fine time to completely change your mind. By the way, how do you even get out of bed in the morning? She officially retires all charges, and asks for Juan to go free. Oh my stars…

Then some village lady shows up to provide her personal speculations about Juan being the baby snatcher, but like Sofia, she doesn’t know what’s real and what’s not. However, she saw a guy dressed like Juan on a black horse. Fernie is now convinced that it was Juan. What do you mean? Everyone dresses like Juan! Didn’t you know that he is the largest trend setter this side of the pacific? Well, that’s enough for Sofia and she’s convinced that it WASN’T Juan! I now declare Sofia to be the official village idiot. Fernie’s disappointed that she stopped worrying about her daughter. Confused as ever, she withdrawals her charges, if nothing else, now she can have a reason to argue with her mother and Fernie.

Apparently Gabi has taken an interest in Vatican-sponsored orphanages, so much so that the local nuns hold up babies and Gabi blesses them by buying them fire engines and playing with their arms. Padre Tadeo isn’t buying it, and wants to know why she’s really there. Uh, I don’t have to explain anything to you. Didn’t you know that she has always been a pious and caring woman? Damn cynic.

Awkward. Juan walks in on Sofiia as she was crying. He wants to talk, but she doesn’t. They never had an important place to talk before, and now they don’t have one, so why talk? Juan assures her that they did have a special place, but how the hell would he know? Do you know your way around town? Well, she walks around the woods at night, so I’d like to think she knows how to get home.

Over at the Striptease House of Fernie Armando has something to tell Rosie, but seeing that Fernie is peeping in on the conversation Armando decides to beat Rosie a couple of times on the head. What's wrong with him? Oh, haha, it's a joke! Rosie sees the humor and understands that Armando did it to protect their secret relationship from Fernie. Armando's good, but not that good, and so Fernie summons him to his office and smacks him around some. There's only so much Armando can take of this, and that's why Rosie better get the hell out of there. By the bye, why is she still employed there? I guess old habits die hard.

So our reunited acquaintances are “talking,” but it's nothing serious (is it ever?); Sofia says that there isn’t anything between them anymore. Juan insists to hear about their marvelous love; however, I don’t remember it ever being marvelous. Either way, she gets excited and decides to tell him about it. But she’s only going to say it once, so listen good. Montage of all the times they met in secret. Wow, the best thing Juan ever did was finding that razor. Just pretend that Sofia had the mental capacity to articulate all those emotions and events we just saw pathetically thrown together and accompanied by some Vicente Fernandez song. After this, Juan gets all excited—just like the time in the barn. Now his memory is in full swing, and he decides that he loves her more than ever. He goes for the kiss, but SMACK! Can’t you understand that there’s too much pain in our lives? It’s over for ever. This whole scenario brings me to a question; if a man has no recollection of a relationship and a woman refuses to acknowledge said relationship, did it ever happen? All hypothetical relationships aside, Sofia is, without a doubt, the most bipolar character on this show. Though, I must say, she is staying true to her life’s theme: self-infliction of emotional pain. I won’t be surprised if she starts beating herself with a horse whip.

Tomorrow: Gabi is about to shit a cow when she finds out that Juan is free. “What if they find out that YOU [Fernie] stole the baby?” “Well, pack your bags, sweetheart, we’re gettin’ out of here!”

Labels:


Comments:
Thank You Nickster! Thank you for staying up an extra half hour to lead tonight's guided tour through the underworld of FELS.
Juan may have lost his memory but his personality has changed too; he's gotten all humble and insecure (except for when he got fed up with the Insufferable One last night and said "Oh just go ahead and kill me, I can't take any more!").
"Creemelo"
 

Yay! I didn't watch tonight but I am convinced that what I just read is way better. Farmers Almanac Center-Fold. Too funny! Thanks!
 

Hey Nickster. I like the new name. Thanks for the recrap and your perseverance.

All of you recappers should get sainthood for this novela. Why do I know the last and newest quote on the banner is about FELS? I never really understood the importance of snark 'til now.

And again I have to thank all those who comment... many of you have missed your true calling in comedy. Thanks for the laughs.
 

It seems that Armando is really sincere in helping Rosario. This is an interesting twist. I'm glad that they finally put to rest all this Mi hija business and Juan is now a free man. Too bad no more Dra. Leonora for me. :(

I can't believe that Don Agustin and Quintina still have not put their silly feud behind them. Everybody has gotten over the Libia cover up already.

Fernando Escandon is just the embodiment of Evil. I'm surprised that no one in Cerdan and Puebla can stop just one man....

I wonder if he will murder Mutton Chops or will mutton last until the end?

What is the name of the actress that plays Natalia aka Nati?

To continue las nights discussion on Good Telenovelas, I youtubed Alboradas and saw the first episode. It is pretty good. I also checked out Amor Real and it is also good. I'm pretty much a rookie here. Having seen the last 2 weeks of Pasion and Followed Fuego from the beginning. Saw Al diablo con los guapos and Juan Querendon on and off, 1 week each of Querida Enemiga And Cuidado con el anghel. I watch Lola erase una vez for laughs and S#$ts and giggles.

Ibarramedia
 

THank you, nickster-son-of-beckster, for the recrap.

Well, it just goes to show you that if you assemble a crowd, gather testimonies from lovers and family members, and yell louder than the guy in charge, you, too, can avoid 7-10 in the state pen.—without court time and processing fees.
Actually, I think that is how a lot of legal stuff gets taken care of in Mexico. Years ago in the Adult Ed ESL class where I hold conversation class, we did a car accident scenario. I chose two ladies from Mexico, set the scene and had them begin talking. Within 5 seconds they were yelling and arguing with each other. HUH? WT*? They said in Mexico they never call the police, and that whoever yells the loudest and wins the argument gets their car fixed by the other person.

Sofia lines. Juan lines. Flashbacks. I wanted to throw something at my TV when Sofia did the hand-to-her-forehead thing. It thought we'd be spared that one in this telenovela.

I'm not a big EY fan but have to say he does look hot with his bouffant hair style and shaved face. In fact, I think he is doing an excellent job interpreting this amnesia segment. So there it is.
;-)

Fernando is evil personified.

doris
 

Thanks Nickster for the recrap. I missed last night's episode because I fell asleep. Doesn't sound like I missed all that much. It probably did me some good not having to listen to Sophia for one night.
 

Nickster, son of Beckster, you have inherited your mother's wit.

At least we got somewhere in this chapter. Has the bug up Sofia's a** finally been removed? Everybody, except Feo and Gabi, have been telling her Juan is innocent - no, let's make that not guilty

Juan and Sofia haven't yet realized that they are free to marry since Sofia's been divorced from (by) Feo. Not a very important point.

Father Tadeo can lead them in the right direction. Feo hasn't confessed to him anything about his involvement in the kidnapping. He's already put two and two together and figured out who's got the baby. But, since neither Juan nor Sofia know how to get to the point by following a straight line, the reveal is going to be long and tortuous.
 

thanks, Nic, for the snarkful 'cap. I am soo tired of the same lines being repeated 2,3,4 times in tha same statement. These writers are so unimaginative...I've figured out why Muttonchops didn't do any investigation- just wait till the last minute, and all the interested parties will show up and give their statements! you can gather all the pertinent info w/o asking any questions or doing any work- BRILLIANT! Just plain interesting how the wheels of justice turn in this TN....Finally!- Sofia smiles, soo much better now, those sobfests were killing me, and I hope that we are done with that now, and the plot moves on. Did one of the lost wheels get re-attached to the train?...dd
 

Nickster, you make my day with your unending wit. But being an incurable romantic, last night when Sofia finally smiled at Juan, my heart just melted and I forgot all her whining and sniveling.
Juan is just gorgeous without his beard! Poor Rosario, I fear her days are numbered.

Fuego in AZ
 

Hey guys, what happened between Rosario and Armando. I fell asleep during conversation.
 

I think Armando's interest in helping Rosario is purely pragmatic. He doesn't trust Feo, he's expecting Feo to turn on him at some point, and he needs an ally. Rosario's the only one he can rely on - all of Feo's other flunkies will be loyal to Feo (or at least not dare cross him).
 

Doris--how interesting. You know, that pretty much explains everything I see on "Casos de Familia."
 

Ohhhhhh...
Nickster, now I can't get the idea of young thirteen year old boys being chastised by their Amish parents when young Samuel is found to have a photo of Sofie stuffed under his pillow.

I guess even though Juan can't remember what he ate for lunch, he somehow remembers his unique gangsta dress mode, a shirt tale out, his colors bandana tucked in his waist band & most importantly...he can't remember the Sofie banging, but like a joke I heard when I was a kid as a test for "young brothers before finally becoming priests", the bell still rings.

I can not take all the credit for Nickster..he does get many fine qualities from his father "Ster".
While I like Juan am rather vague on the details, I am favoring Demian de Mundo, one legged, one eyed...but awesome wicked in a bad/good kind of way with awesome 80's hair (hey it was the late 80's)
 

Nickster, spot on title and recap. Great job.

Fuego in AZ, I am with you. It was great to see Adela and EY together. Even though they're technically not really together (yet),at least they're talking and are in the same town.

I'm hoping for a happy ending for Rosario who seems to be the nicest, kindest (and most sane) character of all. Diana in MA
 

Thanks so much for these recaps. This TN seems to have all the TN cliches, good and bad acting,& super-intelligent animals. Also I noticed a wanted poster for Dale Gribble on the wall @ the jail. It looks like the plot is finally going to move forward. Carlos
 

Carlos? Are you serious about the Dale Gribble poster? (I was going to delete this one unseen, but I'll watch it for a Dale Gribble sighting!)

Also, are you sure it wasn't Rusty Shackleford? ;-)
 

Things have sort of ground to a halt, now that Sofia agrees that Juan may not have stolen her hija. We seem to be done with Leonora and her Dad, so are we going to get some other new character? It's sort of like a parade, every month they bring in a few new people who interact and then leave.
 

Wouldn't it be awesome if, instead of bringing in new people, they could do something fun/interesting with the characters they already have? Like Sofia could take up stamp-collecting and we could watch her sort the stamps and put them in an album. That would be tons more fun than her sniveling.
 

Oh - Ruth! How about Ruth? This would be a good time for Ruth to show up. Either that, or we need someone else to eat an Efferdent sandwich.
 

While I agree with your logic Julie, actually using characters already on the show and bringing new ones, it seems logic is the last thing these writers want. The mystery surrounding Ruth would be great but I'm afraid we have too many months to go before we get any info on that front.
 

Julie, that is just what I was thinking! A month ago everything was about Ruth and then she never showed up. And what about Uncle Uribe? We know he did in the boys parents, where is he? So many loose ends its like pulling the string on Mr. Oogy Boogy and watching everything fall out! Ack!
 

What did happen to Ruth and Ricardo? What happened to Benito and Raquel? Somehow I think we'll see Raquel again but probably not Benito.
 

No! Benito has to come back! I want Rigo to die so Eugenia can marry Benito. (Sorry, Rigo, but you know your days are numbered.)
 

Even tough Juan doesn't remember Sofia, he falls in love with her AGAIN at FIRST SIGHT. It must be her look..." the 1852 Farmer's Almanac center fold resemblance." Too bad Hot Doc didn't give Juan a full eye exam and prescription glasses. However, I must confess it was almost love at first sight for me when I saw ... E Y. How shallow of me. Nicster, thanks for a very funny recap. G in CA
 

Even though Root is Eva's daughter, not Gabriela's, I feel she will be a b****, if she ever appears, because she was raised by Raquel and Ricardo Uribe, who are not models of good citizenry. G in CA
 

And, yuck, her dad is Bern the Perv. G in CA
 

Benito will never return cause he just married a hottie rich girl on the Marichey Angel TeleNovela & he gets to wear cool Elvis Costello glasses, sleep all day & hang out with the uber hipsters..
Go Daddy Go..

If you could escape the bubble would you ever come back?
 

Yikes Nikster! You used the a** word. I got chastised Tuesday by someone who lurks on the internet for just this purpose, evidently.

I think your mama Beckster was subjected to the same treatment. Since I'd just gotten home from the hospital with a husband who had heart problems, it didn't quite sink in...but watch your step young man.

Your loving possible granny" Miss Judy"
 

Fuego stuff aside-if we have to wait for several more months for it to end, then I guess that is how long it will be before we get another GOOD one with the REAL Rey of the Telenovelas-FERNANDO COLUNGA, right? :-(
 

"And, yuck, her [Root's] dad is Bern the Perv." - that's true only if Gabriela was telling the truth. I don't know if she's physically capable of that! I've gone back to hoping that Rosario is really Eva and Bernardo's daughter.
 

I think we should use the A-word every day! :-P
 

Sorry Miss Judy, life on the streets of Brigadoom hasn't been easy for me, so I use a lot of native language. I hope everything is okay with your husband.

Mama, I want you to know that you'll never catch me with one of those filfthy Farmer's Almanac magazines.
 

So, Miss Judy, I just finished reading the comments from your EXCELLENT recap, and wow. Needless to say, cindy looney bin will be voting for John McCain and the castration of homosexuals, minorities, and and anyone else who has the kahunas to say ASS. Well, if saying ass is wrong, I don't want to be right. Love, nickster, user of the word "ass."
 

Ah, yes, I remember it well--the day we were all chastised for using the A-word. And we were accused of being women who used the A-word! Nickster your mama handled it in her usual charming and diplomatic way. :)
 

Um Nick, Cindybin is an infamous troll. She is even mentioned in the Urban Dictionary.Guess she fooled you.
 

Thank you, The Nickster, for a ReCrap and a title worth crowing about. :)

Yes, Fuego in AZ (from yesterday's comments), you are correct. Those spots on Coyote's head were the shadow of raindrops on the windshield of his SUV, as the camera was on the outside of the car. That was what I took it as.

You know, Feo is a great villain played by a terrific actor, but I tell ya... the only way he would grab me and throw me around a room and choke me like some dog (boss, husband, relative, whoever the hell he was to me) is if he had some kind of weapon in his hand at the time. Why does everyone take that crap, even the men?? I'm not claiming to be some badass, but puh-leeze. What he does to Rosy at the Bad Love Bar... he'd have to beat me down into the dirt because everything in the place not nailed down would be going upside his head. Just ask my dad. My brother. My son! I have been assaulted, stalked, and raped. And I will kill a man. (too much information--sorry, that crap's just getting to me)

*stepping down off soap box*

Don't smile at Juan, Slofia. Don't smile at him. Just go away.

Yeah... I saw the other day on one of the Caray! Telemundo novelas, said troll having a fit on those commenters. Complete cut and paste job.
 

Anon 6:07, I thought you were joking so I had to go look it up in Urban Dictionary. That is hilarious!

Really, if people don't like it, don't read it!

And this show drives one to potty typing! Jeez!
 

Potty-typing, LOL! (or, LM@O!!!)
When my sister and I started going a bit gray, we decided it was okay and even fun to say "OH CR@P" once in awhile. It feels good. I'm for it.
JudyB, I hope Hubster is okay.
Sending good thoughts,
"Creemelo"
 

Thanks "Creemelo" and all the others sending good thoughts. Must be helping. He is doing a gazillion times better than he did three years ago when this happened. So now I'm relaxing enough to start reading recaps and enjoying all the chatting we do back and forth. What a relief!
 

Same here, JudyB. All the best to you and hubby.
 

Butter Biscuit Stephe, I have been in a similar situation as yours and I can guarantee you that it's NEVER going to happen again. All this bullying and smacking around gets to me too.
 

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