Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Fuego 1-20: In which Oscar wiggles his little piggies and a snake is dispatched twice.

Hello friends, this is the second of my four stand-in-for-Cheryl Tuesdays.

We start with: Coyote thinking murderous, vengeful thoughts towards Gabriela while she thinks amorous and trusting thoughts towards him; Soledad begging Juan to protect her son Coyote from those murderous, vengeful thoughts of his; a quick recap of the entire Fuego storyline; Franco and Sarita kissy and hijinxy while he complains that her sisters are stubborn.

Oscar, doing his floor exercises, suddenly can move all his toes. "I will walk again! I'll surprise Ximena!"

Ximena is going to rent a car or get train tickets or something to leave town. Darth Ricky watches and decides she'll be his first victim. X shows Sara her ticket, is determined to leave and not give Oscar another chance. Sara proposes she spend her last night at the hacienda, but Ximena doesn't want a fight with mom, she'll come by in the morning for her things.

In the marketplace, Quintina is selling bread with a side of singing thrown in for free. She and Hortensia have a little squabble. The tiny uncle sings a nice song about pigs/riffraff (I didn't get much of it - can somebody post it?) and there's dancing.

In the hacienda, Juan and Sofia commence almost tearing their daughters limb from limb, fighting over who will give them baths. Finally, Juan leads a procession up the stairs - each toddler in the arms of one of the mute rent-a-nuns.

At the bottom of the stairs, Root appears; she and Sofia glare at each other, and Sofia, despite the fact she doesn't give Juan the time of day these days, smugly informs Root: "Every day he is closer to me and farther from you." "You'll pay - your girls first" is Root's malevolent thought-bubble in response.

After bedtime, Juan and Sofia glare at each other in the hallway and say goodnight over and over. He grabs a kiss. She pouts just like my donkey Jethro.

Proof this story does not take place on our planet - I just realized! The full moon every night! On our planet it is not thus.

Anyway, on this particular night the full moon is shadowed for a while, while Ximena tosses in her bed. The clouds part and the moon is bright when Darth Ricky, swathed in black and with a bandanna over his face, sneaks in, grabs her keys, and then tries to rape and/or kill her. Luckily and pluckily she brains him with a hefty crystal vase and he staggers away.

At the very same time, Ruth (whose mischievous outfit tonight is a tied-off shirt, exposed belly button, gloves without fingers, and ridiculous studded chaps) gleefully puts a poisonous snake on the bed of one of the toddlers. Oh! No! Heh heh. She sneaks away...

... but at that very moment, Juan suffers a cramp and realizes the toddlers are in danger! He rushes into their room, grabs the snake (this is at least the second snake in this telenovela) and stamps on it, but it bites him first, so there is general rushing around and Rosendo arrives with the antidote and Juan staggers all over the place wanting to do stuff but he's too dizzy so they put him to bed, where Sarita tells him he's great and that Sofia loves him and the toddlers need him.

Darth Ricky, with a really aching head, staggers off through the night after being brained. A bunch of guys shows up; he knocks a couple of them down but there are lots more, with guns. They point their guns at him. He begs them not to shoot - "Whoever's paying you to do this, I'll pay twice as much! Triple!" - and gets quite hysterical. Coyote calls off his guys ("That's enough for tonight") and they all disappear.

Sofia busts into Gab's room and accuses Furd of the snake-in-toddler-bed trick. He denies it and Gab is indignant etc. and then the exact same scene I got last week: "Mother, why do you hate me so much when I am your own blood?" "Why do I hate you? Do you really want to know?" etc. and they end up in the study in the same positions as last Tuesday, and Gab is again perfectly ready to reveal the sad secret, but this time it is not Soledad but Ximena who disrupts the revelations; she wants to report her night's adventures.

Gab rolls her eyes in profound disinterest as Ximena complains she was nearly violated. Sofia and Sarita are aghast and take their sis away to give her comfort. Ximena tells them her story. Sofia, of course, has to counter with memories of her own, ACTUAL violation and cries a bit before she says, "well it's not about me this time."

Darth continues staggering off through the night and goes to complain to daughter Root about his headache and failed vengeance. He doesn't want a doctor, just some tequila.

Gab stomps off to the bedroom to complain to Furd: "Why didn't you defend me?" but he is not there. She has some uncomfortable flashbacks and decides he's with Ruth and stomps off to find him...

... and Ruth and Furd are, in fact, in bed together ("Let me go," "You know you want it," etc.) having first fought about Ruth's failed snake-bitten-baby vengeance. (Furd: "You failed because you acted alone, get me involved next time.")...

... Gab blows past Root's unconvincing protestations to look in the her bed, but Furd is gone! So Gab goes back to the hacienda...

... and there's Furd in the bed he shares with Gab! He's pretending to be asleep (about as well as I did when I was eight and had just bolted upstairs at the sound of the garage door). I bet he still has his shoes on. Gab yells and accuses him; he makes unconvincing protestations of innocence ("With your DAUGHTER? You think I'm capable of such a thing?") and obediently, after Gab demands: "I must be loved!," puts his rubbery lips on her.

Sofia, still in her supremely ugly purple outfit, sneaks into the room where Juan is sleeping off the snakebite poison. Oh! No! He's burning up with a fever again. This is perhaps his third fever - one in the barn, one in the jungle, and now. Were there others? Poor lad is so susceptible. So Sofia recaps her rape (which we know was committed by Furd, but perhaps she still mostly doesn't suspect...) to the unconscious fellow (just as well, nobody wants to hear it again, wish I was unconscious too) - and kisses his febrile lips.

I missed the scenes from tomorrow, sorry!

Labels:


Comments:
Oh good one Melinama! I loved the bit about Fernando's rubbery, febrile lips...yuuck! The worst thing in this TN so far was when he shot Rosario, then smeared a kiss on her lips as she was dying.
There was one other installment of Juanny Fever (wasn't that a Joan Crawford movie?): when Gabi whippped him within an inch of his life with her li'l riding crop, followed by a great deal of sweating and delirium.
Cheers all!
"Creemelo"
 

Ricardo is an idiot. Why would he take the keys, go down and opne the door when he could have gone in through the window?

It was good to see Coyote's boys rough him up a bit. He deserves it.

Damn, Root with the snake... Girls almost got killed if not for the psychic connection of Juan and the girls...

I will give Jimena a point for clocking Ricardo over the head. Watch him walk around the grounds with a freaking bandage in his head screaming look at me, I did it. Should be interesting tomorrow.

Ibarramedia
 

Thanks, Melinama. I guess Comisario Mutton Chops is just an after thought. Jimena doesn't consider Crap From Afar a crime scene or the need to let the police know or warn the neighbors. How did she high tail it back to the Hacienda...by foot, perhaps in the dark through the Rape Forest? And will Sofia or Juan report the attempt on their hijas and the most pressing question...where were the rent a nuns? So many questions, so few logical answers. GinCA
 

Good one. I have a great "thought bubble" of you high-tailing it up to bed when you hear the garage door go up.

And loved the "to the unconscious fellow"...just as well, no one wants to hear it again, wish I were unconscious too".

You were good on lips tonight...Fernando's rubbery ones, Juan's febrile ones. Your sense of humor is perfect for this train wreck. Thanks Melinama.
 

Yes, gang, major beanie failure last night. Logic kept creeping in as I pondered the ridiculous & nonsensical happenings in Mexidoom (with the perpetual full moon...maybe that explains it). Thanks, Mel, for condensing yet another night of snakes, slaps, & sobs.

GinCA: yeah, why would anyone call Commisario Mutton Chops when crime occurs? We've had it all: rape, murder, kidnapping, breaking & entering, theft...oops, no carjacking...but apparently, the whole town knows that Mutton Chops is about as useful as a raincoat in the desert. Kind of like telephones; why get one of those new fangled contraptions when you can either run like the wind or ride your horse to communicate in extreme emergencies?

I'm totally sick of the slapping & rough sex. Not entertaining in the least and really sick, IMO.

But I did catch the preview of the upcoming "Manana" with Fernando Colunga which can't come soon enough.

Not sure why I still watch because I can't stand 95% of the characters & the 5% I do like are never on.

Maggarita
:-/
 

Good job Melinama. I also wondered why the "intruder" would need the keys when he could just come in the window. Duh! Did Coyote really think that he was incognito with that bandana over his mouth? Hello, I could spot him a mile away! Poor Darth. Didn't you just feel so sorry for him?---NOT. And why does a strapping lad like Juan get a fever every time you look at him. Seriously...I'm just saying..
 

Did our mother-of-the year (Crabi) slap Sarita or was that a migraine induced hallucination? Maybe we should call Mexiloon the Land of the Eternal Moon.
 

Poor Gabi, why can't she just have peace? Her daughters can be so annoying, they complain all the time,and the drama, poor Jimena, so she was ALMOST raped. Why does that have to interfere with her cocktail hour? So, she slapps Sarita, to shut everyone up. Jeez, I wonder if they can make her look any more cruel and evil. And, why didn't Jimena run to the police? Didn't it occur to her that her attacker might be in the rape forrest? At least , it's almost over. Thank you for the recap, you do a great job.
Liena, FL
 

Thanks for your recrap, melinama. Good snark, too! Such lunacy in Mexidoom, too.

.... the snake almost kills Juan, yet NOBODY looks for the dead snake nor removes it from the room. Gaaaah~! How do they know it was really dead? I kept worrying it was stunned, and would crawl up Juan's leg.

So, Jimena is almost raped in her bed at CFA, makes it back to the hacienda on her own, yet doesn't become catatonic like she did when she found out Oscar cheated on her. Which would be more traumatic . . . ummm . . . still pondering that . . . Gaaaah!

Add to the murder attempt list:

Snakebite to Juan.

How is it that Juan goes into raging fever over every injury, yet Darth Rico is back at his daily badness after gunshots, head injuries, etc.?

Oh, never mind, it's telenovela beanie failure.

BTW, at this point I'm starting to realize that Root is not redeemable. At all. What are the telenovela rules about someone who tries to kill small innocent children?

doris
 

Doris, I think the penalty for trying to kill children is a slow and painful death, preferably by a snake.
 

I thought that the black bag that Rosendo was carrying had the snake.

I'm still hoping that Ruth repents. She's a tragic figure.

Have you guys ever wondered if Gabriela is trully Don Agustin's daughter? She is nothing like him...


Ibarramedia
 

I think Rosendo did have some kind of black trash bag thing when he left the room.
 

Thanks, Melinama, excellent 'crap...They are definitely and intentionally showing us that the lunacy of Mexidoon is caused by the perpeptual full moon, it has been in every episode lately, at least once. What was with the aerial view of a large lake last night, just a snippit of a travelog, I guess...Jimena's keys were shown to be stolen because I think that they will be part of the proof against Ricky down the road; as well as the knot on his noggin, the bullet hole in his leg, who knows what else...Crabi is being made to be even more detestable all the time- slapping Sarita for nothing- that's never happened before...Root is now officially an unredeemable character...I'm not certain that Coyote's vengance is planned to cause death to anyone, he would rather push the target to insanity, or mental torture. we have never seen him cause real physical harm to anyone, have we? BTW- Feo's scene frothing outside the hacienda door the other day was marvelous. (That Cantu' does a fantastic crazed performance)A nudge from Coyote would really push him over the edge..
 

A giant shove would be much more satisfying, don't you think? :-}
 

Thanks for the recap Melinama. It's going to be fun watching the body count on this one b/c there are quite a few characters that have to die.
 

Dorado Dave, I agree about Coyote. A looong time ago, I remember Coyote stopping Ferd on the road 3 or 4 times, when Ferd owed El Jefe money. Each time we all wanted Ferd to get beaten up, but Coyote didn't start with a beating, rather he had his guys point a gun, then almost beat him, then beat him a little, etc., each time increasing the psychological pressure.

And now he shoots off Ricardo's hat, then he has the guys beat him just a little and point guns at him.

I'd like to see all four baddies go crazy, Feo, Crabi, Darth and maybe Root, and they're stuck in a hole together, attacking each other, or something like that.
 

Leftover questions from yesterday:

Jardinera: Interesting reference: "The two Marias (not to be confused with the three Marias)" --the Brazillian novela or the infamous Portuguese writings?

Neither - I was referring to the little girls Maria Libia, Maria Guadalupe, and Maria Jóse.

Creemelo: However, please 'splain how "Ricardo and Soledad's eyes met..." Isn't she blind? Maybe his eyes met her ears?

LOL!! You're right! He did mutter her name, and the servant who was helping her reacted. I was thinking he was too far away to be heard, but I should know better. Telenovela characters' sense of hearing adjusts for plot convenience.
 

Yes, Root is doomed. I can't picture redemption for a character who would put a poisonous snake on the bed where a child is asleep. And, yes, where do the freakin' nuns sleep?
 

Excellent recap Melinama. I'm just getting caught up on the last few days.

I thought Ruth had a heart but as she has stooped to attempting to murder children to revenge a grade school slight, she's now likely beyond redemption.

Thankfully, Juan's moving into the hacienda (a rare and unexpected stroke of genius) thwarted Ruth's plan.

Liena: "Poor Gabi, why can't she just have peace? Her daughters can be so annoying, they complain all the time,and the drama, poor Jimena, so she was ALMOST raped. Why does that have to interfere with her cocktail hour?" Why indeed, how selfish :) Diana in MA
 

Oh, did anyone notice, as the nuns were carrying the kiddies up the stairs last night, how one nun had a pink diaper bag over her shoulder?
Is that standard convent-issued gear?
:o)
BTW, why is Darth still vowing vengeance on Sufria? Is it the old middle-school thing with Ruth, or something else now?
"Creemelo"
 

Creemelo: Perhaps I'm wrong but I think Ricky "Darth" is still intent on harming Sophia as she's both Ruth's nemesis and Juan's love. Diana in MA
 

Melinama, I am so, so jealous that you can cover so much action in such a brief recap. It takes me hours and pages just to capture a lot of nothing.

Yes indeedy, there's a full moon every night in Serdan, and just for the record, Ruth's "mischievous outfit" is basically the same every day too.

The individual garments change, but she really likes the mini blouses and mini gloves. I get wanting to show off her torso, but the mini gloves are just weird. (Not weirder than Juan wearing his spurs and hats indoors, I guess.)

I wanted to scream at Jimena for opening the window at the store, but I'm finally accepting that she can't hear me.

I really am curious about Coyote's strategy. He promised to start his vengeance with Ruth, but hasn't made a move on her yet. Meanwhile he's been scaring the hell out of Darth Ricardo but not getting any results, and he hasn't lifted a finger against Gabriela yet either.

And did Feo tell Ruth that Coyote was looking for her? I don't think he did. And I don't think Coyote found Ruth either. Where is that going??
 

I wondered what the deal was with the rent-a-nuns too. THey must go back to the convent each night for prayers and sleep, then wake up long before the roosters and come to the hacienda before sun-up.

It's not just bizarre that they do this, it's somewhat crass that this well-heeled family has THREE nuns helping them. Even if they're paying the convent for the nuns' services, it just seems to me like one should be enough. Surely the orphanage needs them more!

The next telenovela had better be better thought out, that's all I can say.
 

It is like a coyote playing with his prey! Of course he could be trying to hurt Root through hurting her father.
 

At least with the nuns they could come up with some kind of explanation for their presence. Like, they are nannies or something. You certainly don't need 3. I think the writers were hoping that we had are beanies on tightly and didn't notice!
 

I suspect my husband of the dastardly deed with my daughter & want to catch him, so I go through the house yelling, Ruth, Ruth over & over, of course this does not give them the chance to split, oh give me a break!!!!
If I counted right there are 28 episodes left. Pls hurry Fernando Colunga, my favorite.
 

Putting a snake on the bed of a sleeping child, unless it is Damien from The Omen or Rosemary's Baby, automatically puts you on the top of the "bad and must suffer consequences" list!

Really it was a middle school dance, get over it! Her frummpy ass dress and the mean girls in class do not equal a child being killed!

Molly in OR
 

28 & counting, like a prisoner in jail waiting for parole.

Maggarita
;-)
 

Carlos, if you check in--how did the surgery on your doggie go?
 

Also catching up on the last few episodes. Thanks, Jardinera, Julie, and Melinama for your recaps. What was the song they quoted in Gone With the Wind? "Just a few more miles, for to tote the weary load?" That's how I feel about FELS.
Patricia Reyes Spindola aka Quintina is sorta annoying in FELS, but she's really a good actress. Not her fault she has a ridiculous role. Over at "Mariana de la Noche" replay, she's doing a fine job as the wacked-out crazy lady in the woods. Some other familiar characters are also there, including our Oscar, Gaviota, and Cesar Evora.
La Paloma
 

Coyote Can't harm Ruth. She is his half-sister. How can Soledad justify coyote killing his sister?

I would rather Ruth make peace with Sofia and the girls. Ricardo and Fernando must die. This is like a dark comedy novela.

So let's see in this absurd dating game, Maria Caridad ends up with Nabor. Maria Esperanza ends up with Tio Vicente. Quintina has no one. Lol.

Ibarramedia
 

Thanks, Melinama. My favorite line : ''I must be loved.'' Yes, that always works....demanding love. It helps if you stamp your foot while yelling that line ay someone. I plan to try it tomorrow on several people [family, friends, coworkers, strangers] and see if it works. Will people say, ''Alrighty then,,,I love you.'' I think that an awful death is in order by telenovela standards for all these villains : Crabby, Darth, Ferd, and Root. I think that Darth is afdter Sofia because she TOLD him that she knows that he killed the Reyes parents. [Duh....why did she tell him ? He's a bad guy...He killed them , so why wouldn't he kill you, too, Sofia???? Geez.] I think that Root's outfits alone make death a sure fate for her. And, that was slap numnero uno for Sarita , and I think that Jimena has been slapped by Crabby in the past , but I lost count of the number of times Crabby has slapped Sofia. And then there was that time Crabby set fire to the Reyes's bakery/home with Sofia inside. Let's count up Darth's brushes with bad luck : 1]shot in the leg by Juan 2] shot in the hat by Coyote 3] beaned with a vase by Jimena So, will everyone in this novela eventually get a chance to do some damage to Darth by the end of this show ????
 

In addition to all the ridiculous brushes with death, revealing of strategically important information so that the bad guys can counter, total lack of real world child behavior and other beanie-blowing behaviors, I think the one that is getting most on my nerves is Juan's psychic/gastrointestinal radar for danger to his loved ones - come on!
 

Juan is getting on my last good nerve too.
What was with the scratching like he had fleas last night when Sufria was telling him goodnight?
And, remember those hot-n-heavy kissing scenes last summer? Now, Juan tries to give her a dry little peck on the cheek and when she turns away, he just shrugs and does the comical eyebrow lift.
What about that says "Para Siempre"?
"Creemelo"
 

I agree - the scratching is getting annoying as well!

to the earlier comments about Jimena running, presumably barefoot, from town to the hacienda, I have a constant struggle to place all these settings in relation to each other. Because no one ever calls anywhere, everyone is always showing up at each other's hacienda/tienda/iglesia/mercado as if they are all next door to each other. Plus, with all the rampant danger everyone is sure they or their loved ones are in, how come no one ever locks their doors? (Or when they do, they leave the keys by the open window!)
 

Juan apparently gets hives when danger is imminent and then angina when the dastardly deed has been done. Handy. And it has always bothered me too that they can get from hacienda to tienda in a flash, yet the Elizondo girls never ever met the Reyes boys growing up.
I saw Patricia Spindola plays the mother of Frida in "Frida" of course, but haven't had a chance to watch it yet.
 

It's true - I loved the Quintina actress in her tiny role in LFMB. She's very, very talented and funny. Needless to say, I feel that she is being wasted as Fuego's so-called comic relief! (The whole concept of comic relief in a show like Fuego is absurd anyway - it's like adding a crippled orphan to the cast of "Bambi.")
 

Maybe we should make some kind of "map" so we can figure out where everything is. Anybody want to take a whack at it?
 

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