Caray, Caray!

Today's episode had me thinking of one of those old Winnie the Pooh stories where our bumbling bear goes floating up in a balloon, disturbs a beehive and comes to grief, stung all over like our pathetic little Arnie. And once again, the previews sucked us into the hope that Salvador would be rescued...but it was not to be. Monita and Mau did end their romantic day by making slow, sensuous love, but sssssserpent Isabel (thanks EJ) disrupts the mood by coming to look for darling daughter. Aldo continues his downward trajectory, but Lalu has been liberated to go bar-hopping in search of a new romance. So, the usual mix of good news and bad news. Lots and lots of Ximena for her fan club but Arny gets tedious, doesn't he? Not sure those two should end up together.

Now on to the details. Estrella confronts Isabel and lets her know that Monita is with Maurico and they're reconciling and there's not a damn thing the viper can do about. (How do you say "famous last words" in Spanish?) Isabel disses Estrella's acting skills and when she admits that Aldo did see her and Mauricio when they were drugged and nude , Hissy smiles evilly and says' well at least some damage has been achieved. Estrella manhandles her a little bit, (go for the shoulder, Estrella!) and pushes her out the door.

Brief scene of Aldo, leaning against a wall, remembering the horrible sight of his girl and his dad in bed together.

Back to the lovers, sitting now on a grassy bank. (Is Carlos nodding off here?) Yes, it's the same old discussion. "Luchar por nuestro amor" comes up. And the conclusion that one of them is wrong. Either Isabel is evil or Marcos is. But it doesn't matter. What matters is the Great Love between them. We have some goofy smiles, a nice shot of Mau's empty but lovely green eyes, soothing, romantic piano music with a somewhat minor harmony. All very nice. And somewhat soporific.

So back to Ximena's and Arny's not so excellent adventure. Arny, having been bitten all over by some kind of "bichos", is now scratching his back like an old bear rubbing up against a tree. A tree holding a huge bee hive (Or is it a hornet's nest? Experts, weigh in) Down it comes. Ximena's wows turn to ooopsies and Arny takes off screaming like a banshee. Ximena is laughing. Nopis. Can't see these two together long-term.

Our lovers have now returned to the boat and Monita's holding the Camera of Doom, taking some playful shots of her and Mau and no doubt using up the roll so it can be developed. Can't wait! Evening falls. The night sky lights up with fabulous fireworks which then spell out Te Amo Monita. She responds in kind. We have another shot of Mau's glazed eyes and pearly-white teeth. And some ads.

When we come back, they're still smooching, murmuring sweet nothings and the capper, "fuegos artificiales....asi se pone mi corazón cuando te veo" (fireworks...just like my heart when I see you) Well, pretty sure this encounter is going to end up in the bedroom. Let's hope so since Mau had to lay out some serious cash for that bonanza.

Time for the dark side. Salvador, still in the creepy cabaña, is asking plaintively for Gabriela. Nurse is trying to calm him down so Oscar doesn't realize he's no longer drugged. Lorenza is out and about. Oscar is furious and sends the nurse to look for her. And makes veiled references to Sal's imminent demise.

We're at the bodega now and I sure hope no firemen are watching this. A gazillion candles are lit (how long have these dang things been burning?) a rather professional scarlet nightie is on the bed and romance is in the air. No need for nightie. Mau is going to dedicate himself completely to Monita until dawn. Off slides the jacket. Off slides the shirt. Damnation!...more ads.

Double damnation. Now we're back to the very unsexy Arny screaming about his various bites. Ximena lays a little philosophy on him. These little animalitos are just a part of nature. Another precious link in the "cadena alimenticia" (food chain) and he can either see "el vaso medio lleno o medio vacio" (the glass half full or half empty). Forget philosophy. Arny is hungry. This reminds Ximena of a film she saw where a plane crashed in the mountains and the survivors ate one another. Mutual look of horror. Fortunately our little woodswoman decides now is the time to build a campfire (prender una fogata).

While she's doing this, we see Aldo heading back to the strangely congenial drug dealer. He agrees to give Aldo some more pills on credit and even slips him some cash for food. But bring dinero the next time, kid!

Harsh words for the nurse as well. Oscar's reaming her out for letting Lorenza go on the grounds. She protests that she couldn't leave Sal. He protests that Sal's a piece of furniture and she certainly could. He and Jeronimo head out to look for her and Nurse suggests to Sal that now is the time to make their escape.

Sensuous love scene. Mauricio is of the slow hand variety of lover. Candles burning. The camera focuses on the flame and next we see the flames of Ximena's campfire. Another nifty transition. However, this is no cosy campfire. Ximena's idea of camping involves visions of evil witches with "pelos raros" (strange hair) ready to seize hapless peasants and rip their hearts out. Suddenly a moaning distraught (and strange haired) Lorenza appears out of the shadows. Now both Ximena and Arny are screaming.

Back to our lovers. They're in that dreamy post-amour lull but our Mauricio is sad. Without telling Monita the real reason for Aldo's disappearance (he implies it was because he stopped the wedding) he vows to spend the next day searching high and low for him. He has all her support. More smooching ensues.

Back to the woods. Arny is exhausted from all the running and screaming. He's on the verge of a heart attack. Nopis. We can't stay here, sez Ximena. But pretend I'm a tree. Now hug the tree. I'll protect you. And hug you back. We'll walk together. Awww...now that was sweet. Not sure where it rates on EJ's meter, but pretty high up in my opinion.

Rolu and Lalu. Not so sweet. In fact, pretty darned distraught. Edgy. Cranky and worried. So much so that Lalu's French manicure is ruined. Tragedy. The truth comes out. Arny is NOT gay. Cara impactada Lalu. More ads.

Now Nurse and Salvador are fleeing through the murky woods. Well, not fleeing exactly. Sal is dragging and then he turns his ankle (torció el tobillo). Nurse checks it and pronounces it an "esguince" (sprain). Heads back for something to brace it with.

And speaking of injuries, how about Lalu's broken heart!? He's playing that violin for all it's worth, lamenting his self-esteem dragged down to the floor by Arny's constant rejections. Nosiree, that doesn't just get canceled by a little apology Mr. Rolu! Well, maybe it does. He didn't fall in love with Arny after all. No? What about those love letters? Ximena wrote them. Yikes, Arny wrote MY love letters, admits Rolu. Two caras impactadas. What if Xime and Arny have fallen in love? And run away together? Zounds.

Double zounds. Salvador staggers out of the dark and scares the bejesus out of Xime and Arny. "Sigue la luz" (follow the light) yelps our favorite New Age Valley Girl. Help me, Sal croaks. To no avail. Our two detectives run off in a fright and Lorenza finds him instead. And then our hapless couple is found by Oscar and dragged back to the cabaña.

Meanwhile Shirleylock and Pooh Bear have wandered out on the highway and encountered Jeronimo, trolling along in his sports car. He reluctantly rescues them (Why, of all the millions of people on the planet does this happen to me? he moans). There's some pantomime pointing to Arny's puffy face and Arny's hapless shrugs and we learn how to offer your lap to someone. Since there's only one seat available Xime says "Me cargas o te cargo?" Arny ends up on HER lap. Go figure.

Lots of sturm und drang back at the apartment. Rolu is in full paranoia, sure that Xime and Arny are having an affair. Grabs her picture and throws it (and his apple) to the floor. Lalu tenderly retrieves the picture, dusts it off and tells Rolu to get a grip. That kind of thing only happens in the movies. Sure 'nough, at that moment, the phone rings. A happy, innocent Ximena burbles that she and Arny have just been rescued and are on their way home. Worries over, Lalu heads off to the bar to find a new love (Un clavo siempre saca a un otro clavo. Y a mi encantan los clavos!) Never thought about the phallic overtones of that dicho until now. Thanks Lalu.

Mientras tanto Aldo has arrived by taxi to the house (guess that's where the food money went) and is lolling on the sofa, still tortured by the visions of Dad and Estrella in bed together. More ads.

Now Oscar arrives back, furious that Salvador also escaped. Nurse quickly makes up a story about heading to the kitchen for tea. Maybe Salvador's building up a resistance to the medication? Fine, from now on give him a double dose. He won't be a disturbance much longer, threatens Oscar. And what is that kid doing here!? Gets very rough with our little guy. Shoves him and tries to throw him out. Aldo pleads his case. Oscar decides it's safer to keep him around. In his drugged state he might slip and let out the secret of Salvador's existence....and location.

Now a brief respite with our three game girls, Estrella, Gabriela and Paula (who's looking quite nifty lately. Snazzy makeup, no glasses, whassup with that?) They're musing about the mad passionate love Mauricio and Monita must be making right this very moment. Particularly given that hot nightie, red roses and flaming candles. Some sighs and yearning looks. I'm with you gals. Let's spread this around a little bit.

Just as our cozy lovers are wishing time would stand still, the doorbell rings. It's the wicked witch, pretending to be worried about Monita's whereabouts (dang Estrella for telling her where she is). Monita apologizes for not letting her know. Mauricio adds that they've reconciled. Both tell her they're very happy. Hissy's face sours and she makes a visible effort to fake a happy smile herself. But barely manages. And there we end.

Previews:
Constanza is chiding Isabel for failing to have Monita see the entangled bodies of Mau and Estrella. But Isabel informs her she took pictures.
And at breakfast the next day, we see Monita holding the Camera of Doom.
Aldo sees Salvador and learns he's not dead.

Vocabulary:
anclada = anchored, stuck (Ximena telling Arny that they just can't stay there)
el vaso medio lleno or medio vacio = glass half full or half empty
férula = ruler, but can also mean "splint". What nurse when looking for
esguince = sprain (Salvador)
torcerse el tobillo = to turn or sprain one's ankle
no te arrimes!= don't come closer! Jeronimo fending off a grateful (but smelly) Ximena
sigue la luz = follow the light
el más allá = the great beyond, the hereafter
en nuestros narices = right underneath our noses (Rolu talking about Xime and Arny supposedly falling in love)
qué crees? = guess what?
no es bronca suya = none of your business (Aldo to Oscar)
me cargas o te cargo = do I sit on your lap or do you sit on mine?
un clavo saca a otro clavo = one nail drives out another, a new loves replaces an old one
prender una fogata = light a campfire
cadena alimenticia = food chain
jerga = slang, but also floor rag (Lalu's self esteem after countless rejections by Arny)

Dicho of the Day

Dos es compañia, tres es multitud. = Two's company, three's a crowd.
Never more true than when Hissabel rings the doorbell and interrupts our two lovers.

Labels: gancho