Caray, Caray!

Friday: Lorena has announced to the family, in a nutshell, that any man who doesn’t want to sleep with her hot mama self is gay. Emiliano must agree, because he slaps Axel and calls him a perv. Mauricio is in campus rapist mode, even though Marianela tells him she has a novio. He pulls a knife on her.

*******

Her school chum Carolina and three gratifyingly fit guys spot what’s going on and rescue her, and the guys knock Mauricio down and kick the hell out of him.

One of the family reminds Emiliano that Axel is his son, to which Emiliano replies that he doesn’t have weirdos for sons. Fedra asks how Axel could do that to them – what are they going to tell their friends? Never mind that their only friends are Lorenzo and Muñeca who heaven knows have their own problems, like a daughter in jail. Kristel is sure they’re going to be social outcasts. Emanuel reproaches them all that they’re supposed to be family, united.

Gretel tries to say that they should support Axel, but Emiliano says that he had two sons, and now Axel’s wrecked everything. He orders Axel out of the house. All right, says Axel. If you are disgusted by me, I feel sorry for you. He leaves. Whoa – I had to rewind and yes! That’s an actual tear coursing down Fedra’s cheek.

Carolina and two of the guys are having cokes in the cafeteria with Marianela, who tells them Mauricio is trying to force her to be in a beauty contest. Caro lights up at the idea. You should do it! You’re beautiful! Who says a person has to be skinny to win?

Me, I’m just relieved to finally have a scene where nobody gets hit.

Back to Homophobia House… Emanuel tells his father that he just made the worst mistake of his life. Fedra says it was the right thing to do. Emanuel pleads that Axel needs their support. Forget it, says Gretel, this home is all about appearances. Emiliano proclaims that nobody gets to question his decisions. Axel is an outcast, doomed to wander the desert of familylessness for the rest of his life and that’s that. Fedra can’t believe this is happening to her. She goes off, calling for Bernardo.

Kristel, also tearful, tells Emanuel and Gretel that Axel just wrecked everyone’s lives. Emanuel wonders what’s happening to the family. They’re the same, Emanuel, they’re just in full bloom.

Apparently Ilitia’s been released from jail, because here she comes out of the police station with her mother when the press descends. Is it true you spent the night in jail? Oh, no no no, she laughs, I was just here about my car. Lorenzo shows up and hugs her, then takes her to his car, Muñeca trailing them, dragging Ilitia’s little rolling suitcase behind her.

Brandon and Oliver come out of the station too, and we note the press going in. Anyway, Brandon says he’s glad he’s done with Ilitia. He assures Oliver that even though she’s a model, she can’t hold a candle to his Marianela.

Mauricio comes into the house bruised and bleeding and doubled over. Kristel runs to his side and calls for Emanuel. Mauricio tells them all that it’s Marianela’s fault – she sicced like ten huge guys on him at the university. Emanuel and Gretel don’t believe it.

Fedra is lamenting to Bernardo that Axel has none of her character, her backbone. She tried to make a man of him, Bernardo saw her try! Bernardo tells her there’s nothing she can do. He knows how she hates to have things slip out of her hands. Is there a cure? No, says Bernardo.

Fedra sighs and says she won’t let this polish her off. That’s the spirit, says Bernardo, and besides you have much more pressing things to worry about. That lady? She has a one-way ticket to the great beyond.

Some back and forth with Mauricio and the unbelieving Emanuel and Gretel. Gretel asks him what he was doing at the university anyway. Emanuel says okay, well yeah, he did go to the university, but not to bother Marianela; he wanted to talk to her about the beauty contest. Guess what? She told me she has a novio!

Doris is admiring Brandon, who has dressed up a bit because he’s steppin’ out with his novia. Marianela says she’s not a fashion person, but Doris says she’ll love the fashion show. Netty, in a bathrobe, comes in and tells Marianela that she and Doris are going to get her looking like a princess.

Emanuel and Ilitia have arrived at what I guess is the fashion show. Ilitia tries to charm him out of his glum mood. She spots Kristel and Mauricio with Andre and waves. Whew, what happened to Mauricio? she wonders. She takes Emanuel over to them and asks them to keep an eye on him – so many gorgeous models will be there. Off she goes. Emanuel tells them he’s worried because Axel has disappeared.

There he is with his pal Aldo at a party, telling him what happened at home. But it’s all for the best – he’s tired of pretending. Aldo tells Axel he’s cool with him the way he is, then leaves and sits with a girl, putting his arm around her (okay, Aldo’s straight, we get it) and another fellow, a stranger, comes up to Axel and says he knows what he’s going through; he’s been through it himself.

The press is questioning Emanuel about his maybe upcoming marriage to Ilitia, it’s supposed to be the event of the year! He says she’s terrific, but they haven’t set a date yet. He spots Marianela, who is being told by Brandon that she’s the prettiest one there. Distracted, he tells the press that they’ll be the first to know the date.

Marianela has spotted Emanuel too. Kiss me! she orders Brandon. He complies and Emanuel’s eyes bug out.

Poor deluded Muñeca is making a giant heart out of red rose pedals on her bed, sprinkling a few extras around for effect. Flora the maid comes in with a champagne bucket and exclaims over the preparations, but asks if Muñeca’s sure Lorenzo will be coming home. Muñeca’s sure! With Ilitia off at the fashion show, she and Lorenzo are going to have a fabulous, romantic reconciliation! Flora doesn’t want her hurt again. Muñeca enthuses that she’s going to work hard to make her husband happy, and she’s not going to make any more mistakes.

Cut to Begoña opening her door to Lorenzo, who guess what! has champagne too. He comes in, leaving a trail of slime behind him. He pops the cork and says they’re going to celebrate, then opens a big jewelry box to show a necklace he’s bought her to thank her for helping him get Muñeca eating out of this hand again.

Marianela and Brandon are still kissing. Emanuel thinks it’s too much, and so do I. Who necks at a fashion show? Kristel is amazed that a good-looking guy like that would go for that whale. Doris notices that Emanuel is staring. Marianela has to give Brandon a tiny shove to get him to stop kissing her. He looks like he’s surprised to be back in the real world. She tells him he doesn’t have to kiss her like that. He says he likes to do things right, and she asked. Would she like another kiss? She looks over to Emanuel, and says sure. They kiss again and Emanuel sputters.

Benigno and Paula are in the kitchen, discussing how the general brandishes his pistol. Paula tells him next time to come get her and let her handle it when he gets gun happy. It just scares her to death when she hears that thing go off. Fedra is eavesdropping. Paula asks him if she’s sure he emptied the gun. He assures her he did while the general was sleeping. Fedra skips off, happy.

Emanuel is nervous and keeps shooting glances over Marianela’s way. Andre tells him to knock it off, it’s Ilitia’s event.

Meantime, over at a little table, Brandon and Marianela look cozy but what they’re actually doing is talking about running into the primos and friends. Just my luck! Says Marianela. Brandon tells her this is the sort of thing rich folks like, so it’s not surprising they’re there.

Doris and Oliver show up at the table with the program where they’ve found out that Ilitia’s going to be in the show. Brandon is bummed.

Emanuel is taking gulps of wine and can’t stop looking over Marianela’s way.

The general is in a suit and tie (why?) and Fedra comes in, startling him. He calls her a poisonous vipor and demands to know what she’s doing there.

We see a shadowy figure in the dark. Something falls over with a thud. Netty bolts awake. She runs to her bedroom door and there’s Gladiola. Netty is relieved, until Gladiola tells her she thinks she heard someone on the patio. Gladiola thinks they should get Javier to take care of it, but Netty reminds him that he’s just a child. Netty says she’ll take care of it and she grabs Gladiola’s hand while Gladiola tries to hang onto the bedroom door knob.

Maximo has pulled his gun on Fedra and tells her to get out. She says she’s had it with his theatrics and he should be kissing her feet for letting him stay. He says that it’s not her house and he’s not going to fall for her tricks. She says Throw me out if you can. The only reason I’ve let you live is because you stay down here like a rat in a cage. Maximo yells that the reason he stays there is to not have to shrivel up his eyeballs seeing her. Out! She approaches him and leans towards him so his gun is touching her throat. What’re you going to do? Shoot me?

Maximo pulls the trigger. Boom! says Fedra. He tries again. Boom! she says again. She smiles broadly. He looks at the gun, disbelieving, then growls that she was lucky.

There is someone in the patio! He’s all hooded in black. The two ladies come into the living room, look around and nervously assure themselves that it must’ve been a cat. Outside, the stealthy figure (who we of course know is Bernardo) opens the electric panel and cuts the wire. The house goes dark and the ladies shriek. They decide to go look for candles. Gladiola heads off in one direction, and Netty in the direction of the patio where she thinks she has some candles. (Of course, that’s exactly where Gladiola thought she heard someone. Don’t ask.)

Brandon has noticed that Emanuel doesn’t seem happy to see Marianela and him together. Tough, he says, pecking Marianela on the cheek. Oliver wonders to Doris why Gretel isn’t there with her siblings. Doris tells him to forget about her and keep an eye on Brandon because Emanuel might start something with him.

Kristel notices that it’s bugging Emanuel seeing Marianela and Brandon together. Emanuel says not at all, and heads over to them, despite Kristel’s protests. Kristel grabs Mauricio to follow.

Hi, says Emanuel to Marianela and Brandon.

The figure in black grabs Netty from behind. She tells him to take whatever he wants. He says what he came for is her. He shoves her away and raises his gun to shoot her. Mama Dolores runs out of nowhere in front of Netty and is shot, falling into Netty’s arms. Bernardo, instead of shooting Netty, the one witness, and of course his principal target, runs off. (Again, don’t ask. Aw, I gotta ask anyway. Did he have only one bullet?)

Emanuel tells Marianela that he’d never have thought he’d see her at a fashion show, particularly with that police guy. He smiles, trying to look light-hearted. Brandon says that “that police guy” happens to have a name, Brandon Moreno. Doris angrily says that she’s his sister, Doris. Kristel laughs and says Brandon and Doroty! Your mama sure named you to grow up to be nacos.

Emanuel asks what they’re doing there. Marianela says they have as much right as anyone. Brandon waves him away, telling him to go back to his group and leave them alone. Emanuel tells him he wasn’t talking to him, he was talking to his cousin. Your cousin? says Brandon. Well, your cousin just happens to be my novia.

That’s ridiculous, says Emanuel. No it isn’t says Marianela. Last night Brandon took me to this great place, we were talking and dancing, and he asked me to be his novia. She kisses Brandon’s cheek and they laugh and he kisses her and says te amo.

Gladiola, Consuelo and little Javier appear in the patio. Netty tearfully tells them what happened and tells Consuelo to run for help.

Maximo is going through his desk drawers, frantically looking for ammo. Fedra tells him there isn’t any – does he think she’d be stupid enough to come in with him armed to the teeth? Stupid, crazy old man.

I’m the only one here who isn’t crazy, he fires back at her, because I’m the only person in this house who knows what you really are. Benigno! he calls. Fedra tells him nobody’s going to come because nobody can stand old men like him. Maximo has a framed velvet piece on his desk with his medals displayed on them. Fedra starts picking them out one by one and throwing them over her shoulder. He begs her to stop.

In the living room, Emiliano is wondering out loud why Axel did that to him. He hears shouts – Fedra shouting Leave me alone! Don’t touch me! and Maximo shouting Old witch! Emiliano runs to see.

Netty is weeping over Dolores, who, startingly, answers, saying she’s lived long enough and who are they to mess with God’s plan? Anyway, she’s left Netty surrounded by good people. Her chest hurts, and it’s not the bullet, she says. It’s the pain she feels at Netty being alone (what about the “good people”?). Netty tells her not to talk, it’s too much work. Dolores says she doesn’t think the doctor’ll make it, but he likes Netty, but that lawyer, he’s nice, and he’s been checking Netty out. Promise me that you’re going to have a man, one who loves you and takes care of you. Don’t stay alone. God bless you all.

And with that, this show’s payroll dropped. Weeping and wailing.

Fedra is going around, picking up Maximo’s tchotchkies and throwing them. He says he’ll kill her and grabs her by the throat. He must be weak from living in a cellar like a mushroom, because she doesn’t even try to grab his hands away and yells “help!” Emiliano bursts in and then she acts like she’s really being strangled. He pulls the general away and demands to know if he’s gone nuts. Get out, both of you! yells Maximo.

Well, there’s poor Muñeca, alone with her candles and rose-decorated bed, having champagne alone. She dials the phone. We see Lorenzo making love to Begoña, while his cell phone goes off. Muñeca leaves a message, saying please come home. This is where you belong. I want to show you that I’m your Muñeca, who loves you and misses you so much.

More weeping over Mama Dolores. The doctor is there now, but it’s too late. Netty mourns that Dolores did it for her, to save her life.

The fashion show has finally started – the models are vamping down the runway. Emanuel tells Andre he can’t believe Marianela’s with that cop. Andre guesses that he likes full-figured gals. Kristel wonders how Marianela got such a handsome guy, which ticks off Mauricio a little. Kristel assures him he’s a different kind of handsome.

Doris crosses the room to say hi to Andre, who barely acknowledges her. She returns to her side, while Brandon tells her that guy’s a giant fake. Brandon tells Marianela that probably Emanuel will back off after tonight. Marianela remembers her friend telling her to make Emanuel jealous.

But here comes Ilitia down the runway and Emanuel glows at her. Marianela deflates.

Emiliano is on the phone with somebody, alarmed about Maximo. He hangs up and asks Fedra why on earth she went into the basement. All fake hysterical, she lies that Maximo sent for her, and then insulted her, shot at her, and tried to kill her. She can’t live with the fear! Emiliano assures her that it’s all taken care of, an ambulance is on the way and he’s going to have Maximo committed this very night.

Where is Benigno, faithful caretaker of the grounds and the general too?

All the models parade out for the finale, Ilitia leading them. She is given the microphone and she thanks everyone, then says she has a big announcement. She and Emanuel are engaged! He looks stunned, but steps up to take her hand. The press crowds around and one asks if she’s pregnant. Oh heavens no, she says. I keep my figure perfect. Heaven forbid that I would deform my body like that. Nobody looks good with a big body, she adds, cutting her eyes at Marianela.

Emanuel notes that being a mother is a privilege. Marianela suddenly decides she wants out of there, and off she hastens, Brandon following. Although the photographers are still snapping shots of him and Ilitia, Emanuel tries to go after Marianela, he says to see what’s wrong. Ilitia grabs him by the arm and tells him through gritted teeth that he’s not going anywhere. He’s hers.

Kristel makes snotty remarks about Marianela and Mauricio tells her that Marianela’s jealous because she’s in love with Emanuel. Kristel is stoked by this hot gossip.

The police chief is at Netty’s along with some cops. She explains that Brandon and Oliver are out for the evening. He wants to hear exactly what happened.

Emiliano comes into Maximo’s room, the guys in the white suits following. He tells Maximo he’s going where he can’t hurt anybody. Maximo pulls a big knife from his desk drawer and says he’s going down fighting, and Fedra, who wants to get rid of him, is the one he wants to kill. Emiliano, standing quite close, tells him to hand over the knife. Or kill him – go ahead! Maximo is sorrowful and says Emiliano shares his blood, he just can’t. Emiliano sadly tells the guys to do their job. Don’t touch me! says Maximo, putting his hands up in weak defense.

Delicia is putting things away in the fridge, and when she closes the door, she spots Bernardo and jumps. He asks her what she’s doing up so early, and she asks him what he’s up to himself, her eyes scanning him. He has his black skulking outfit on and after he scoffs and walks off, he drops his black ski mask by mistake. She picks it up and realizes what it is and guesses something’s going on.

Emanuel seems to be in the cocktail lounge of the fashion show. He looks dejected and tells Andre that Marianela can’t be in love with that cop. Andre wonders why not, and wonders if he’s jealous. He says it’s not that, it’s that he doesn’t want anybody in his family taking up with that guy. Andre tells him a person doesn’t need glasses to see that he’s in love with la gorda.

Avances: Ilitia prepares for the boda of the century. Emanuel goes to see Marianela, smiles at her, puts his hands on her shoulders and looks into her eyes.

Labels: llena