Friday, March 09, 2012
El Talismán #28 Fri 3/9/12 In which Tal*Mart announces a Fire Sale. And the paper? FUGGEDABOUTIT!
Haiku recap. Crap.
Qué tal those limpid pools now
only AlcaTrash.
It’s true, dear Talismaniacs. Our comedy has been elbowed out by the new Televisa melodrama and we are now relegated to the midday Slot of Shame, subject to the vagaries of our DVRs and finding time to watch what is recorded.
On our ultimate Friday night together
ALL THE PIGS ARE WALLOWING AT ALCATRASH TONIGHT
LuCrazy defies the Pig. She refuses to sign over her part of AlcaTrash in return for his help in winning over Pedro.
The Pig is undeterred. He musters up the now drunken Valentín and trots over to the bordello looking for the Madame. He needs Brigitte to dig up that crooked notary public she knows, Lucas somebody. He has a document that needs tampering.
Doris finds Antonio waiting for her when she gets home from her shift at the boink mill. He’s mad that she’s trying to turn the F-girls against him. She provokes him, almost exactly as LuCrazy did earlier, by calling him less of a man than Pedro. But Doris gets the reaction we all know LuCrazy only dreams about. First he smacks her around and then he throws her down and ravishes her. Crazy Doris wins a round.
LuCrazyIsAnUnderstatement looks plenty jealous when Alberta tells her the Belt Buckle and his wife are fighting.
Lu meets up with the postcoital/postbeatdown Buckle and tells him about the Pig’s thwarted attempt to get her share of AlcaTrash. If Antonio does his part by getting Camila out of her way, her AlcaQuarterTrash is his. If not, she’ll sell it – or just give it – to Pedro. Grrrrrr says Tony’s frowny face.
The F-girls comfort each other. Fabi gets a call from Armando and that makes Flor even sadder because it reminds her of her tragic break-up with her imaginary suitor, José.
THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY -- OR -- TRACY TELLS ALL
Armando and Camila don’t get it. A civil ceremony in a week? Why the shotgun wedding? Camila has serious doubts about this Renato guy.
Pedro pretends to be oblivious to El Viral's glares and verbal digs. He keeps on smiling, quietly taking in everyone's measure. [Perhaps he is mentally fitting them for the straightjackets for which they are clearly candidates.]
Pancho finally emerges from the kitchen bearing a tray of drinks. (Keep those hands where we can see them, buster.) He greets Camila and Pedro and then reveals that Tracy is the secret chef responsible for the high class food El Viral has just been raving about.
Now it’s Tracy’s turn to make an appearance. She and Camila exchange girlish hugs and go into the kitchen to catch up on old times.
Meester Renato gives Tracy the stinkeye and thought bubbles: She’d better keep her mouth shut.
El Viral gives Camila the stinkeye and thought bubbles: Just what I needed. My daughter “tuteando” with the help.
It takes a bit of squeezing (Camila has to promise she won’t reveal her sources) but Tracy finally spills – Meester Renato thinks Camila’s ma is loaded and that’s why he’s courting her. He himself doesn’t have a penny. Why he takes money from her! He’s a complete phony!
Camila respects Tracy’s wishes and doesn’t confront Renato at the party. She and Pedro take their leave so coldly that even El Viral notices that the temperature has gone down. Which she blames on Pedro, of course.
AT EL TALISMÁN
Sarita is wearing a kinky catwoman maid’s uniform and she and Gabriel are just getting warmed up when ...
Tía Patricia pounds on the door. Pedro has called and asked after Lu and now Tía realizes the suicidal gate-crasher is missing. Damn. Everyone stops what they are doing to go Lu-hunting.
LuCrazyButPitiful finds them all in the livingroom and feigns surprise that her absence has caused a stir. Expressing a tear from her boundless teat of self-pity she asks if it’s a crime to fall in love. Because that’s her only offense – being in love with Pedro.
Look closely and you’ll see that dopey Claudio is buying it.
AT THE ONLY HOTEL INN™ -- OR -- EL VIRAL DENIES, DENIES, DENIES
Pedro’s hand is poised to knock on El Viral’s door but he stops when he hears raised voices inside.
Camila has served up the unpalatable truth – Renato is a complete fake. He’s not a millionaire. Not even close. “Check him out yourself” pleads Cami.
El Viral simply will not believe her. Not only that, she would marry Renato even if he had no money. You heard it, folks. She’s that into him.
But of course that’s not the case. He DOES have money. She saw his house, his butler, his car. For the love of all that is holy, He has a YACHT.
Where did she get that story anyway?
Avert your eyes, dear viewers, from the flash of the lightbulb that goes on over El Viral's head: "It was that maid, that TRACY person, wasn't it?"
Oh it wasn't that criada??? Well then it’s obvious. Camila’s just making up lies out of jealousy because she’s stuck with the low-class rancher, Pedro Ibarra. And she doesn’t want her mother to be happy.
In that case, Camila can forget she has a mother. She has to choose – Pedro or Mommy Dearest! Now go!
Here El Viral flings open the door ... only to find Pedro standing on the other side, calmly waiting for Camila.
Avances: There are none. Now that the show has been banished to the daytime Slot of Shame, no one can be bothered to cobble together the re-views they have been calling pre-views.
Qué tal those limpid pools now
only AlcaTrash.
It’s true, dear Talismaniacs. Our comedy has been elbowed out by the new Televisa melodrama and we are now relegated to the midday Slot of Shame, subject to the vagaries of our DVRs and finding time to watch what is recorded.
On our ultimate Friday night together
ALL THE PIGS ARE WALLOWING AT ALCATRASH TONIGHT
LuCrazy defies the Pig. She refuses to sign over her part of AlcaTrash in return for his help in winning over Pedro.
The Pig is undeterred. He musters up the now drunken Valentín and trots over to the bordello looking for the Madame. He needs Brigitte to dig up that crooked notary public she knows, Lucas somebody. He has a document that needs tampering.
Doris finds Antonio waiting for her when she gets home from her shift at the boink mill. He’s mad that she’s trying to turn the F-girls against him. She provokes him, almost exactly as LuCrazy did earlier, by calling him less of a man than Pedro. But Doris gets the reaction we all know LuCrazy only dreams about. First he smacks her around and then he throws her down and ravishes her. Crazy Doris wins a round.
LuCrazyIsAnUnderstatement looks plenty jealous when Alberta tells her the Belt Buckle and his wife are fighting.
Lu meets up with the postcoital/postbeatdown Buckle and tells him about the Pig’s thwarted attempt to get her share of AlcaTrash. If Antonio does his part by getting Camila out of her way, her AlcaQuarterTrash is his. If not, she’ll sell it – or just give it – to Pedro. Grrrrrr says Tony’s frowny face.
The F-girls comfort each other. Fabi gets a call from Armando and that makes Flor even sadder because it reminds her of her tragic break-up with her imaginary suitor, José.
THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY -- OR -- TRACY TELLS ALL
Armando and Camila don’t get it. A civil ceremony in a week? Why the shotgun wedding? Camila has serious doubts about this Renato guy.
Pedro pretends to be oblivious to El Viral's glares and verbal digs. He keeps on smiling, quietly taking in everyone's measure. [Perhaps he is mentally fitting them for the straightjackets for which they are clearly candidates.]
Pancho finally emerges from the kitchen bearing a tray of drinks. (Keep those hands where we can see them, buster.) He greets Camila and Pedro and then reveals that Tracy is the secret chef responsible for the high class food El Viral has just been raving about.
Now it’s Tracy’s turn to make an appearance. She and Camila exchange girlish hugs and go into the kitchen to catch up on old times.
Meester Renato gives Tracy the stinkeye and thought bubbles: She’d better keep her mouth shut.
El Viral gives Camila the stinkeye and thought bubbles: Just what I needed. My daughter “tuteando” with the help.
It takes a bit of squeezing (Camila has to promise she won’t reveal her sources) but Tracy finally spills – Meester Renato thinks Camila’s ma is loaded and that’s why he’s courting her. He himself doesn’t have a penny. Why he takes money from her! He’s a complete phony!
Camila respects Tracy’s wishes and doesn’t confront Renato at the party. She and Pedro take their leave so coldly that even El Viral notices that the temperature has gone down. Which she blames on Pedro, of course.
AT EL TALISMÁN
Sarita is wearing a kinky catwoman maid’s uniform and she and Gabriel are just getting warmed up when ...
Tía Patricia pounds on the door. Pedro has called and asked after Lu and now Tía realizes the suicidal gate-crasher is missing. Damn. Everyone stops what they are doing to go Lu-hunting.
LuCrazyButPitiful finds them all in the livingroom and feigns surprise that her absence has caused a stir. Expressing a tear from her boundless teat of self-pity she asks if it’s a crime to fall in love. Because that’s her only offense – being in love with Pedro.
Look closely and you’ll see that dopey Claudio is buying it.
AT THE ONLY HOTEL INN™ -- OR -- EL VIRAL DENIES, DENIES, DENIES
Pedro’s hand is poised to knock on El Viral’s door but he stops when he hears raised voices inside.
Camila has served up the unpalatable truth – Renato is a complete fake. He’s not a millionaire. Not even close. “Check him out yourself” pleads Cami.
El Viral simply will not believe her. Not only that, she would marry Renato even if he had no money. You heard it, folks. She’s that into him.
But of course that’s not the case. He DOES have money. She saw his house, his butler, his car. For the love of all that is holy, He has a YACHT.
Where did she get that story anyway?
Avert your eyes, dear viewers, from the flash of the lightbulb that goes on over El Viral's head: "It was that maid, that TRACY person, wasn't it?"
Oh it wasn't that criada??? Well then it’s obvious. Camila’s just making up lies out of jealousy because she’s stuck with the low-class rancher, Pedro Ibarra. And she doesn’t want her mother to be happy.
In that case, Camila can forget she has a mother. She has to choose – Pedro or Mommy Dearest! Now go!
Here El Viral flings open the door ... only to find Pedro standing on the other side, calmly waiting for Camila.
Avances: There are none. Now that the show has been banished to the daytime Slot of Shame, no one can be bothered to cobble together the re-views they have been calling pre-views.
Labels: Talisman
Comments:
<< Home
thanks, NM!!
i thought Pedro was having a LOT of fun at that party today... and i too was flinching at Panchito having any contact with the food or drinks...
but those two, tracy and panchito, are fast becoming my favorite couple here.
i thought Pedro was having a LOT of fun at that party today... and i too was flinching at Panchito having any contact with the food or drinks...
but those two, tracy and panchito, are fast becoming my favorite couple here.
Thank you NovelaMaven! Very funny as usual. I loved boink mill and teat of self pity.
I really have mixed feelings about the move to the slot of shame. The show really is awful but the recappers made it so fun. I would love to know how the actors feel about this crap. What did they do to piss their agent off and get cast in this show?
I really have mixed feelings about the move to the slot of shame. The show really is awful but the recappers made it so fun. I would love to know how the actors feel about this crap. What did they do to piss their agent off and get cast in this show?
NM, many thanks - "expressing a tear from her teat of self pity" was too good by half!
The scene w/ Sarita in her outfit waiting behind the door was kind of a "QTH?" moment. Seemed like a lot of trouble for the subsequent Tia pounding on the door moment.
Sara, I agree with you and let's hope some of these actors survive this stain on their resumes.
The scene w/ Sarita in her outfit waiting behind the door was kind of a "QTH?" moment. Seemed like a lot of trouble for the subsequent Tia pounding on the door moment.
Sara, I agree with you and let's hope some of these actors survive this stain on their resumes.
Thanks, NM. Fire sale at Tal*Mart, jajá. We'd buy it all up anyway.
Favorite turns of phrase:
“Qué tal those limpid pools now”
“boink mill”
“LuCrazyIsAnUnderstatement”
“Keep those hands where we can see them, buster.”
“Just what I needed. My daughter “tuteando” with the help.”
I watched the 9-minute trailer that Vivi posted yesterday for Silvia Navarro's new TN, Amor Bravío, and I was almost in tears over how good it looked. Yes, I remember -- that's what they're SUPPOSED to be like...
Favorite turns of phrase:
“Qué tal those limpid pools now”
“boink mill”
“LuCrazyIsAnUnderstatement”
“Keep those hands where we can see them, buster.”
“Just what I needed. My daughter “tuteando” with the help.”
I watched the 9-minute trailer that Vivi posted yesterday for Silvia Navarro's new TN, Amor Bravío, and I was almost in tears over how good it looked. Yes, I remember -- that's what they're SUPPOSED to be like...
Permalink posted by 
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 10:21:00 AM EST
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 10:21:00 AM EST
Blue Lass- I really want to see Amor Bravio and I hope Univision plans to air it. I hope they don't do to it what they did to LVO and PVAA
Aaaargh! So are they simply dropping El Tal? It seems that the new Abismo de pasion is in this time slot next week -- but Familia is STILL listed for 2 freaking hours and El Tal is totally missing.
Does anyone else have different info about this? I was so hoping that the new show meant cutting back our amusing Familia to one hour and slipping either Abismo or El Tal into the 8:00 slot. But it doesn't look like that's the plan. Anyone know what is going to happen to El Tal?
Güera
Does anyone else have different info about this? I was so hoping that the new show meant cutting back our amusing Familia to one hour and slipping either Abismo or El Tal into the 8:00 slot. But it doesn't look like that's the plan. Anyone know what is going to happen to El Tal?
Güera
Permalink posted by : Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 11:28:00 AM EST
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 11:28:00 AM EST
Güera- I believe they are moving El Tal to an afternoon slot. I don't see why Uni doesn't just show 4 shows and move UFCS back to one hour.
Another delicious recap...
"Mid-day Slot of Shame"
(well-deserved sez I)
"back from her shift at the boink mill" (poetry in motion)
"boundless teat of self-pity" (what a gem)
I hope to forget this telenovela quickly, but I'll always remember the team's fabulous recaps.
Outstanding.
"Mid-day Slot of Shame"
(well-deserved sez I)
"back from her shift at the boink mill" (poetry in motion)
"boundless teat of self-pity" (what a gem)
I hope to forget this telenovela quickly, but I'll always remember the team's fabulous recaps.
Outstanding.
Tia Patricia seems to be the only completely sane person in the show, though I suspect that's only because we haven't been shown that she has her own Deep Dark Secret yet. (See also Matilde, Eva Luna.)
As for this hot mess being exiled to afternoons: I guess it'll make a fun/cracked-out double bill with Corazón apasionado when that starts up. But it'll be kind of sad, since nobody will be around to snark on it. :( Honestly, I'm not looking forward to The Passion Pit (hee); Angelique Boyer looking like some sort of busty teenage jailbait is, amazingly, only part of that.
As for this hot mess being exiled to afternoons: I guess it'll make a fun/cracked-out double bill with Corazón apasionado when that starts up. But it'll be kind of sad, since nobody will be around to snark on it. :( Honestly, I'm not looking forward to The Passion Pit (hee); Angelique Boyer looking like some sort of busty teenage jailbait is, amazingly, only part of that.
Novela Maven--You didn't take my suggestion for a title, but I posted very late last night. I like this one just fine. Thank you!
Inside I'm weeping, because at long last, this disaster is improving. (Can you have an improved disaster?)
This is the comment from last night, with some adjustments. (In case you missed it--I was inordinatley proud of it.)
##The Case of The Disappearing Suitcase....
Doris Rolls in with it;
It sits in the Living Room in Full View;
Antonio Scowls;
Anonio and Doris Argue;
Suitcase Disappears Before Their Very Eyes;
Doris Disappears;
Antonio Disappears;
Alberta Disappears (from the Living Room, that is).
I wish Tweedledeedee and Tweedledeedummy would Disappear.
Loved, Loved, Loved Piedrito growing a pair tonight. He was cute and sassy. Where has he been for the last 26 capitulos.##
Anita
TAL*MART NEWS
Since this may be our last full-bodied recap before we dissolve, there will be a Fire Sale at Tal*Mart (only a few new items were added, so the liquidation sale won't take long).
The Manager
FREESNOW UNDERGROUND GAZETTE NEWS
As For FUG--the paper is facing telenovela bankruptcy (some evil-doer's bookkeeping sleight of hand). Before it ends up Under-the-ground, there will be a last issue.
The Editor
Inside I'm weeping, because at long last, this disaster is improving. (Can you have an improved disaster?)
This is the comment from last night, with some adjustments. (In case you missed it--I was inordinatley proud of it.)
##The Case of The Disappearing Suitcase....
Doris Rolls in with it;
It sits in the Living Room in Full View;
Antonio Scowls;
Anonio and Doris Argue;
Suitcase Disappears Before Their Very Eyes;
Doris Disappears;
Antonio Disappears;
Alberta Disappears (from the Living Room, that is).
I wish Tweedledeedee and Tweedledeedummy would Disappear.
Loved, Loved, Loved Piedrito growing a pair tonight. He was cute and sassy. Where has he been for the last 26 capitulos.##
Anita
TAL*MART NEWS
Since this may be our last full-bodied recap before we dissolve, there will be a Fire Sale at Tal*Mart (only a few new items were added, so the liquidation sale won't take long).
The Manager
FREESNOW UNDERGROUND GAZETTE NEWS
As For FUG--the paper is facing telenovela bankruptcy (some evil-doer's bookkeeping sleight of hand). Before it ends up Under-the-ground, there will be a last issue.
The Editor
Well, NM, nice send-off to El Tal. I am thinking I will keep watching because I do find it enjoyable. Maybe we can choose to add P.S.Tals at the end of our Passion comments, for those who want to snark about El Tal. We never really talked about the actual show that much, it was the sideshow that kept us entertained.
NM - For as bad as we trash talk this tn, I actually felt a sense of grief reading your title. Que lastima. I know we have more hanging avocados and high powered vibrating cell phone jokes left in us.
That bit of grief was soon alleviated by the rest of your recap. Nicely done. Thank you. I loved "LuCrazyButPitiful" and "daytime Slot of Shame".
What is with that cat costume?
The party was so fun. I laughed the most when out of nowhere Elvira walks into the middle of the room and announces "Estoy tan feliz". lol
Off to a baby shower. Thanks goodness it is a luncheon at Red Lobster with no games!
Nuestro fin de semana de El Tas snark.
Rosemary la Otra
NM - For as bad as we trash talk this tn, I actually felt a sense of grief reading your title. Que lastima. I know we have more hanging avocados and high powered vibrating cell phone jokes left in us.
That bit of grief was soon alleviated by the rest of your recap. Nicely done. Thank you. I loved "LuCrazyButPitiful" and "daytime Slot of Shame".
What is with that cat costume?
The party was so fun. I laughed the most when out of nowhere Elvira walks into the middle of the room and announces "Estoy tan feliz". lol
Off to a baby shower. Thanks goodness it is a luncheon at Red Lobster with no games!
Nuestro fin de semana de El Tas snark.
Rosemary la Otra
Novela Maven:
Thanks for this fitting send-off to El Tal.
'Haiku recap. Crap. Qué tal those limpid pools now only AlcaTrash.'
Love it!
Also, you can't say Camila did not try to tell E-vile-ra.
"Renato is a complete fake. He’s not a millionaire. Not even close. “Check him out yourself” pleads Cami. El Viral simply will not believe her. Not only that, she would marry Renato even if he had no money. You heard it, folks. She’s that into him."
Like Blue Lass, gimme Amor Bravio, any day. I adore Sylvia Navarro and would would probably pay to watch her paint easter eggs in a silent film.
Oh, well, it looks like we are on to Passion Pit. An ignominious send off by Univision but I feel a little snark left in the old reserves and I'll bet the rest of our recapping team still has it. The translation "Passion Pit" for the title does not bode well—hmmmm.
I like Zepeda but Boyer leaves me cold. However, Zepeda is too old for the role, according to Jarocha. Colunga had that problem in Manana is Para Siempre, but he is TBLMOE. (Childhood friends, seperated by someones well-intentioned Mother, etc).
Hey, Anita, the Case of the Disappearing Suitcase sounds worthy of Agatha Christie! Nice work.
EJ
Thanks for this fitting send-off to El Tal.
'Haiku recap. Crap. Qué tal those limpid pools now only AlcaTrash.'
Love it!
Also, you can't say Camila did not try to tell E-vile-ra.
"Renato is a complete fake. He’s not a millionaire. Not even close. “Check him out yourself” pleads Cami. El Viral simply will not believe her. Not only that, she would marry Renato even if he had no money. You heard it, folks. She’s that into him."
Like Blue Lass, gimme Amor Bravio, any day. I adore Sylvia Navarro and would would probably pay to watch her paint easter eggs in a silent film.
Oh, well, it looks like we are on to Passion Pit. An ignominious send off by Univision but I feel a little snark left in the old reserves and I'll bet the rest of our recapping team still has it. The translation "Passion Pit" for the title does not bode well—hmmmm.
I like Zepeda but Boyer leaves me cold. However, Zepeda is too old for the role, according to Jarocha. Colunga had that problem in Manana is Para Siempre, but he is TBLMOE. (Childhood friends, seperated by someones well-intentioned Mother, etc).
Hey, Anita, the Case of the Disappearing Suitcase sounds worthy of Agatha Christie! Nice work.
EJ
Thanks, all. It HAS been fun, hasn’t it?
Anita, I’m so glad you brought your comment over from last night. You’re right – it would have been a shame for it to go unappreciated. And I would have missed the drama of the disappearing suitcase entirely. Gracias!
I’ve heard that E-Bay is so flooded with Ramerawear right now that sellers are actually paying people to haul their stock away. And “Talismaniacs Raisin’ Hell” shirts are stacking up in Goodwill collection boxes all over the country.
Personally I think it is short-sighted to divest oneself of zebra cloth, high-heeled sneakers and giant belt buckles. With production halted, they will become scarce and then begin to appreciate.
And to those who would with such alacrity exchange their avocado pits for passion pits – and you know who you are – those who would take flatfooted melodrama over comedic magic realism ... um ... can someone help me end this sentence? Anyhoo, have fun. Don’t text and drive. (but don’t worry about drunk driving. It doesn’t count.) And never ever ever mess with la Viejita.
Perhaps R la O said it best:
“Que lastima. I know we have more hanging avocados and high powered vibrating cell phone jokes left in us.”
Anita, I’m so glad you brought your comment over from last night. You’re right – it would have been a shame for it to go unappreciated. And I would have missed the drama of the disappearing suitcase entirely. Gracias!
I’ve heard that E-Bay is so flooded with Ramerawear right now that sellers are actually paying people to haul their stock away. And “Talismaniacs Raisin’ Hell” shirts are stacking up in Goodwill collection boxes all over the country.
Personally I think it is short-sighted to divest oneself of zebra cloth, high-heeled sneakers and giant belt buckles. With production halted, they will become scarce and then begin to appreciate.
And to those who would with such alacrity exchange their avocado pits for passion pits – and you know who you are – those who would take flatfooted melodrama over comedic magic realism ... um ... can someone help me end this sentence? Anyhoo, have fun. Don’t text and drive. (but don’t worry about drunk driving. It doesn’t count.) And never ever ever mess with la Viejita.
Perhaps R la O said it best:
“Que lastima. I know we have more hanging avocados and high powered vibrating cell phone jokes left in us.”
EJ, I'm glad to see your reservations on Boyer:
"I like Zepeda but Boyer leaves me cold"
You realize that people are probably throwing virtual avocados at us right now but I admit I find her acting mannered, straight from the Televisa School of Hyperbole.
And after seeing Zepeda in La fuerza del destino ... well. He is a bit limited in range. He does spiteful quite well but passion? Not so much.
"I like Zepeda but Boyer leaves me cold"
You realize that people are probably throwing virtual avocados at us right now but I admit I find her acting mannered, straight from the Televisa School of Hyperbole.
And after seeing Zepeda in La fuerza del destino ... well. He is a bit limited in range. He does spiteful quite well but passion? Not so much.
TAL*MART BIG LIQUIDATION SALE
ALL SALES FINAL
Please help us empty the shelves before Monday night.
CLOTHING & ACCESSORIES DEPARTMENT
Can we have zebra skin pants in Tal*Mart, Please? Size ginormous
Two sizes: ginormous and waaaaaay too small.
I want a matching pair of ginormous zebra...shorty overalls, like Sarita! The placket in front may hide some of my many sins and the zebra print will distract, I hope. (Disclaimer and notice to PETA--no real zebras were harmed in the production of these textiles or ceramics)
Can I get a "Wide Load" sign for the t-shirt I wear under the farmer-john shorty?
Talk to the Belt Buckle Buckle (One size fits all--See Episode 26)
CHILDREN'S BOOK SECTION
Extensive Dr. Seuss Collection – edited by Julia and others, and updated for Ought-Twelve
If I Ran the Zoo!
If I Ran the Brothel
The 500 Swimming Suits of Lucrecia
Pedro, The Big-Hearted Moose
Oh, The Places You'll Go to Avoid Watching This Show
El Narizpicador in the Hat
Green Eggs and Ham When I Told You I Wanted Red Eggs and Ham?
Horton Hears a Who and Camila Says Que Que
Fox in Hooker Mask
How the Grinch Stole His Son's Wife
One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish in Spanglish
LuLU McSlut
Horton hears a Ho
Oh, the Thinks [sic] You Can Not Bother To Think!
Ten Avocados Up On Top!
Hop On Pop, And Crush Him Nearly To Death But Leave Him In Lingering Agony
Mr. Ibarra Can Woo! Can You?
The Footsie Book
There's a Wocket In My Pocket, Or Maybe I'm Just Happy To See My Sister
If I Ran the Circus, Maybe the Plot Would Make Any Sense
The Bitter Battle Book
And To Think That I Saw It On El Talisman!
Doris the Horis Hatches a Plot
The Fox that Rocks
The Screetches
Hop on Pop (needs no revision)
There's a Rocket in My Pocket
The 500 feathers of Camm-ila Cubbins.
Too Many Johns
Slam, Bam, Thank-You-Ma-am I Am
And in honor of Antonio:
The Thorax
and
The Boda Bag Battle Book
Last because it was left off the original list:
The Pale Avocado Green Pants (Oh the Places they’ve been)
ALL SALES FINAL
Please help us empty the shelves before Monday night.
CLOTHING & ACCESSORIES DEPARTMENT
Can we have zebra skin pants in Tal*Mart, Please? Size ginormous
Two sizes: ginormous and waaaaaay too small.
I want a matching pair of ginormous zebra...shorty overalls, like Sarita! The placket in front may hide some of my many sins and the zebra print will distract, I hope. (Disclaimer and notice to PETA--no real zebras were harmed in the production of these textiles or ceramics)
Can I get a "Wide Load" sign for the t-shirt I wear under the farmer-john shorty?
Talk to the Belt Buckle Buckle (One size fits all--See Episode 26)
CHILDREN'S BOOK SECTION
Extensive Dr. Seuss Collection – edited by Julia and others, and updated for Ought-Twelve
If I Ran the Zoo!
If I Ran the Brothel
The 500 Swimming Suits of Lucrecia
Pedro, The Big-Hearted Moose
Oh, The Places You'll Go to Avoid Watching This Show
El Narizpicador in the Hat
Green Eggs and Ham When I Told You I Wanted Red Eggs and Ham?
Horton Hears a Who and Camila Says Que Que
Fox in Hooker Mask
How the Grinch Stole His Son's Wife
One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish in Spanglish
LuLU McSlut
Horton hears a Ho
Oh, the Thinks [sic] You Can Not Bother To Think!
Ten Avocados Up On Top!
Hop On Pop, And Crush Him Nearly To Death But Leave Him In Lingering Agony
Mr. Ibarra Can Woo! Can You?
The Footsie Book
There's a Wocket In My Pocket, Or Maybe I'm Just Happy To See My Sister
If I Ran the Circus, Maybe the Plot Would Make Any Sense
The Bitter Battle Book
And To Think That I Saw It On El Talisman!
Doris the Horis Hatches a Plot
The Fox that Rocks
The Screetches
Hop on Pop (needs no revision)
There's a Rocket in My Pocket
The 500 feathers of Camm-ila Cubbins.
Too Many Johns
Slam, Bam, Thank-You-Ma-am I Am
And in honor of Antonio:
The Thorax
and
The Boda Bag Battle Book
Last because it was left off the original list:
The Pale Avocado Green Pants (Oh the Places they’ve been)
NM:
You are breaking my heart. I didn't see Fuerza but I had such high hopes for Zepeda after his eeeevil turn in Sortilegio. Sigh. Life is full of disappointments, but at least the man has the good grace to wear very tight trousers.
I must also compliment you on the phrase, "flat footed melodrama." You convey so much in just three words. Haiku practice is clearly paying off.
EJ (Grinning and dodging another over-ripe avocado being aimed at her head)
You are breaking my heart. I didn't see Fuerza but I had such high hopes for Zepeda after his eeeevil turn in Sortilegio. Sigh. Life is full of disappointments, but at least the man has the good grace to wear very tight trousers.
I must also compliment you on the phrase, "flat footed melodrama." You convey so much in just three words. Haiku practice is clearly paying off.
EJ (Grinning and dodging another over-ripe avocado being aimed at her head)
I have a confession to make.
I went to a baby shower today and I wore.... I wore.... dare I tell you?.... I wore.... a headband.
I went to a baby shower today and I wore.... I wore.... dare I tell you?.... I wore.... a headband.
It's OK, R la O:
We love you unconditionally.(Grin.)
Besides, you look good in a headband, unlike some marmotas we know.
EJ
We love you unconditionally.(Grin.)
Besides, you look good in a headband, unlike some marmotas we know.
EJ
Was it a zebra-print headband? Or did it at least have cat ears on it?
Permalink posted by : Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 6:14:00 PM EST
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 6:14:00 PM EST
Thanks, EJ!
Blue Lass, it was the worse kind of headband you can imagine. Purple sparkle!
NM - you are also coming to Passions, right? Your comment telling us to "have fun" and "feel free to drink and drive" sounded like you maybe you weren't. We need Nuestra Profesora!
Blue Lass, it was the worse kind of headband you can imagine. Purple sparkle!
NM - you are also coming to Passions, right? Your comment telling us to "have fun" and "feel free to drink and drive" sounded like you maybe you weren't. We need Nuestra Profesora!
So, what's the word, gang? We stay with our time slot and throw any spare energy at El Tal?
If we're going to dive right into the Abismo, I think it's still the case that we have no regular recapper for Mondays. Shall we just put up a header and talk amongst ourselves?
If we're going to dive right into the Abismo, I think it's still the case that we have no regular recapper for Mondays. Shall we just put up a header and talk amongst ourselves?
Permalink posted by : Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 8:14:00 PM EST
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 8:14:00 PM EST
I can do a recap for this coming Monday, since the first ep in this novela is very key in the story... and it will be very helpful that someone that knows the story do the first recap...
Awesome -- let's roll!
Me voy, me voy, me voy
Con vosotras
Las diosas
Me voy de aquiiiiiiiiiiiiii
Me voy, me voy, me voy
Con vosotras
Las diosas
Me voy de aquiiiiiiiiiiiiii
Permalink posted by : Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 8:23:00 PM EST
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 8:23:00 PM EST
I don't mean to speak for her, but I was hoping Sara could do Mondays and every one else stay the same. Sara?
However, that is such a good idea, Marta, for you to do the first one. I'd love it nice and clear in the beginning.
Is Sylvia asea somewhere? Should the Coast Guard sail one of us around the Pacific looking for her? Katarina! Arturo!
However, that is such a good idea, Marta, for you to do the first one. I'd love it nice and clear in the beginning.
Is Sylvia asea somewhere? Should the Coast Guard sail one of us around the Pacific looking for her? Katarina! Arturo!
I like the idea of us staying with the time slot but those of us that can record ElTal and discuss it can have someone put up a header so we can keep snarking at it...
LOL you guys are not going to believe this... i read a very quick recap of ep 1 and something Mark said about the story changing a bit from the one 15 yrs ago... guess what the change is?
en vez de un cañaveral ahora son campos de chiles habaneros, es más campestre.
so instead of avocadoes we will have habanero chiles... LOL!!!
en vez de un cañaveral ahora son campos de chiles habaneros, es más campestre.
so instead of avocadoes we will have habanero chiles... LOL!!!
I volunteer to put on my traje de neopreno and go look for Sylvia...as soon as I can get the telenovela cat off my lap.
Permalink posted by : Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 9:05:00 PM EST
: Saturday, March 10, 2012 at 9:05:00 PM EST
Habaneros? From hanging avocados to wrinkled habaneros. Hmmmm, what jokes could we ever find to go with that?
Blue Lass - your traje de neopreno may be more functional, but I think Sylvia would spot you floating out in the ocean better if you wore the dress you have on in your picture.
FREESNOW UNDERGROUND GAZETTE, Vol. 1 n.3 (Part 1)
Sorry Folks, due to circumstances beyond our control, this will be the last issue of FUG.
UNDERCOVER OPERATIONS NOT UNCOVERED
OOPS (Operation Opprobriate Pedro Soon)
OPEL (Operation Poison El Pig)
OPEP (Alternate Spelling of Operation Poison El Pig)
OGRE (Operation Gagorio/Rat Extermination)
PIMP (Pig Ingesting Medicinal Poison)
O CRAP (Operation Choke Rat And Profit)
O POOP (Operation Pull One Over (on) Pigorio)
TAL*MART STATIONERY AND CLICHETERIA DEPARTMENT
(Special Offering)
Downloadable for use as Greeting Cards (or alternatively Fortune Cookie fortunes)
Cliché #123: You will wake up the avenging anvils if you tell your lover that nothing and no one will ever separate the two of you. The anvils can hear those words through all the other celestial chatter. It is guaranteed you will be separated, sometimes for most of a telenovela.
Cliché #273: You Will Strike a Devil's Bargain.
Cliché #448: You must leave doors open when you are having a key behind-closed-doors private conversation
Cliché #449: The obverse is true—when you are having a key conversation that is about to reveal a secret, no one is listening at the door.
Cliché #522: You will find out the local priest is not just your Father, but your father.
Cliché #675: Phone messages, like mail, are rarely delivered in time, on time or to the right person.
Cliché #687: You show anger by hurling a cell phone across the room; if said cell phone is not handy, a glass of unfinished whisky or tequila will do (glass must shatter). If you happen not to have either, stand in front of your desk or dresser and clear the top of everything (then you can throw pillows and kick chairs). Never, never do this infront of anyone—you MUST be alone for it to be most effective.
Cliché #731: You are accused of a crime, jailed and are only released by a twist of fate or kindly judge. It’s never for evidence, testimony, alibis or police investigation reports (Hope for a trial for murder, they are the shortest)—or you are aided by a trusted friend in making a daring escape.
Cliché #777: Guns fired at you will graze you, hit you in the shoulder, arm, leg or stomach, may put you in the hospital, but are never fatal. Guns you fire at a villain (in self-defense only) are almost always lethal even if said subject is crouching behind a car. Wall safes are fair game for target practice.
Cliché #890: When caught red-handed, you must declare, “It's not what you think! We have to talk! Please listen to me!” (Ugh. That is one of my least favorite telenovela clichés; it's even worse than amnesia.)
Cliché #890.1: Amnesia
Cliche #963: HEART MEDICATION. (Anvil time, Gregorio)
Cliché #978: The first person to tell the story is the one who is believed. (Thanks to 5ft Latina’s Mr. 5ft over on LQNPA.) This obviously includes lovers and law enforcement officers.
Cliché #998: When innocuous sobriquets are not exactly what you want, the word Estupido! is required.
Cliché #999: If you are a villain or villaness, important papers you are looking for are always in plain sight or in the top drawer of the desk you are rifling through. If you are a galán (or gallina), important papers you are looking for are never found.
FREESNOW COMMUNTIY COLLEGE-NEWS
Snark ‘n Spanish 101
M,T,W,Th,F, 9-10pm*
Prof. Sara gives it her all. Audiovisuals supplied by Univision
NM, they're continuing education credits -- you can take them with you everywhere.
*Alternate semesters, Prof. Blue Lass takes over the class.
FLASH: Above classes have just been CANCELLED FOR LACK OF A QUORUM
Sorry Folks, due to circumstances beyond our control, this will be the last issue of FUG.
UNDERCOVER OPERATIONS NOT UNCOVERED
OOPS (Operation Opprobriate Pedro Soon)
OPEL (Operation Poison El Pig)
OPEP (Alternate Spelling of Operation Poison El Pig)
OGRE (Operation Gagorio/Rat Extermination)
PIMP (Pig Ingesting Medicinal Poison)
O CRAP (Operation Choke Rat And Profit)
O POOP (Operation Pull One Over (on) Pigorio)
TAL*MART STATIONERY AND CLICHETERIA DEPARTMENT
(Special Offering)
Downloadable for use as Greeting Cards (or alternatively Fortune Cookie fortunes)
Cliché #123: You will wake up the avenging anvils if you tell your lover that nothing and no one will ever separate the two of you. The anvils can hear those words through all the other celestial chatter. It is guaranteed you will be separated, sometimes for most of a telenovela.
Cliché #273: You Will Strike a Devil's Bargain.
Cliché #448: You must leave doors open when you are having a key behind-closed-doors private conversation
Cliché #449: The obverse is true—when you are having a key conversation that is about to reveal a secret, no one is listening at the door.
Cliché #522: You will find out the local priest is not just your Father, but your father.
Cliché #675: Phone messages, like mail, are rarely delivered in time, on time or to the right person.
Cliché #687: You show anger by hurling a cell phone across the room; if said cell phone is not handy, a glass of unfinished whisky or tequila will do (glass must shatter). If you happen not to have either, stand in front of your desk or dresser and clear the top of everything (then you can throw pillows and kick chairs). Never, never do this infront of anyone—you MUST be alone for it to be most effective.
Cliché #731: You are accused of a crime, jailed and are only released by a twist of fate or kindly judge. It’s never for evidence, testimony, alibis or police investigation reports (Hope for a trial for murder, they are the shortest)—or you are aided by a trusted friend in making a daring escape.
Cliché #777: Guns fired at you will graze you, hit you in the shoulder, arm, leg or stomach, may put you in the hospital, but are never fatal. Guns you fire at a villain (in self-defense only) are almost always lethal even if said subject is crouching behind a car. Wall safes are fair game for target practice.
Cliché #890: When caught red-handed, you must declare, “It's not what you think! We have to talk! Please listen to me!” (Ugh. That is one of my least favorite telenovela clichés; it's even worse than amnesia.)
Cliché #890.1: Amnesia
Cliche #963: HEART MEDICATION. (Anvil time, Gregorio)
Cliché #978: The first person to tell the story is the one who is believed. (Thanks to 5ft Latina’s Mr. 5ft over on LQNPA.) This obviously includes lovers and law enforcement officers.
Cliché #998: When innocuous sobriquets are not exactly what you want, the word Estupido! is required.
Cliché #999: If you are a villain or villaness, important papers you are looking for are always in plain sight or in the top drawer of the desk you are rifling through. If you are a galán (or gallina), important papers you are looking for are never found.
FREESNOW COMMUNTIY COLLEGE-NEWS
Snark ‘n Spanish 101
M,T,W,Th,F, 9-10pm*
Prof. Sara gives it her all. Audiovisuals supplied by Univision
NM, they're continuing education credits -- you can take them with you everywhere.
*Alternate semesters, Prof. Blue Lass takes over the class.
FLASH: Above classes have just been CANCELLED FOR LACK OF A QUORUM
FREESNOW UNDERGROUND GAZETTE, Vol. 1 n.3 (Part 2)
SPRING EVENTS
Regatta Races at the Fresno Yacht Club
(Please see Carlos in Episode 24 for entry registration and requirements (draft, size, sails, motors, etc.)
WEDDINGS AND ENGAGEMENTS
The Nájera Family is not pleased to announce the engagement of Elvira Nájera, lovely middle-aged mother of Camila, the agronomista and José Armando, sometime student, viuda de Estegone (some time ago), to tal Sr. Renato (no last nombres, please).
The bride will be estrenaring a fake fur cape seductively draped over her arm, revealing an off-white (but could be cebra-striped, but definitely not blanco), off-the-shoulder, form-fitting, above the knee dress. Her platform spiked heels will coordinate nicely with the dress and the porsupuesto rhinestone-studded headband.
The bride is a native of Texas, where her mamacita still resides, but she is not invited to the wedding (while neighboring hacienda owners will be—with the exception of her future son-in-law, The Rock).
After high school, she married and has never worked a day in her vida, depending financially on her now defunct, gamling-addicted marido, mother and subsequently her daughter to maintain her in the estilo to which she wanted to be accustomed.
The groom is of unkown origin, having shown up in the Freesnow area with his "niece" in the last couple of years. He is a dapper, well-known about town, mature, businessman. He owns a mansion and a yacht and has lots of money (segun el).
Though their noviazgo has been of rather short duration, the couple assures us their love will keep them unidos para siempre hasta que el dinero los separen.
A boda por el civil is to take place next Monday, but possibly may not be cinched since there is always the possibility of some unintended interruption.
The recepción will take place immediately after at Rita’s Place, a popular gathering place for the hoi polloi. While the couple desperately prefers to be part of the hoi oligoi, they will participate in the festivities. There will be dancing, but no mariachi, this is Freesnow Alta Sociedad, after all.
The couple plans a short honeymoon at the Fresno Yacht Club to participate in the Regatta Races (see announcement above).
TIME CHANGE (Don’t forget to “Spring Forward” tonight).
Univision announces a “new” Telenovela, slated for that time-honored slot at 1 pm, daily (when, according to the NYT, only Spanish speaking nannies are watching.
Here is the original synopsis from Univision (which doesn’t sound very much like the one we’ve been watching since January):
In “El Talismán” a loving father who loses it all in a poker game, has no idea the far-reaching repercussions of his actions; ones that will forever change his daughter’s destiny. Trapped in the middle of an old feud symbolized by the powerful haciendas of “El Alcatráz” and “El Talismán”, Camila Aceves (Blanca Soto) and Pedro Ibarra (Rafael Novoa) will be the pawns in this unlucky game. He is a handsome and courageous man who, despite being cynical about love, cannot help but open up his heart to her. She is a young, beautiful and intelligent woman that can’t stop herself from loving him despite the uncertainty about his past. But when Pedro unwittingly becomes the man that brings Camila’s father to his ruin, destiny will turn them into enemies. Spinning a web of secrets and lies around them will be the handsome but arrogant Antonio Negrete (Aarón Díaz), along with his sensual and manipulative sister Lorena (Lola Ponce). They will do everything in their power to turn the odds to their favor and win what their hearts’ desire most – to destroy Camila and Pedro’s relationship. As deceit, betrayal, and confusion tear Camila and Pedro apart, only one question remains: will they find the talisman to turn luck in their favor?
Signing off, your faithful editor,
Anita
SPRING EVENTS
Regatta Races at the Fresno Yacht Club
(Please see Carlos in Episode 24 for entry registration and requirements (draft, size, sails, motors, etc.)
WEDDINGS AND ENGAGEMENTS
The Nájera Family is not pleased to announce the engagement of Elvira Nájera, lovely middle-aged mother of Camila, the agronomista and José Armando, sometime student, viuda de Estegone (some time ago), to tal Sr. Renato (no last nombres, please).
The bride will be estrenaring a fake fur cape seductively draped over her arm, revealing an off-white (but could be cebra-striped, but definitely not blanco), off-the-shoulder, form-fitting, above the knee dress. Her platform spiked heels will coordinate nicely with the dress and the porsupuesto rhinestone-studded headband.
The bride is a native of Texas, where her mamacita still resides, but she is not invited to the wedding (while neighboring hacienda owners will be—with the exception of her future son-in-law, The Rock).
After high school, she married and has never worked a day in her vida, depending financially on her now defunct, gamling-addicted marido, mother and subsequently her daughter to maintain her in the estilo to which she wanted to be accustomed.
The groom is of unkown origin, having shown up in the Freesnow area with his "niece" in the last couple of years. He is a dapper, well-known about town, mature, businessman. He owns a mansion and a yacht and has lots of money (segun el).
Though their noviazgo has been of rather short duration, the couple assures us their love will keep them unidos para siempre hasta que el dinero los separen.
A boda por el civil is to take place next Monday, but possibly may not be cinched since there is always the possibility of some unintended interruption.
The recepción will take place immediately after at Rita’s Place, a popular gathering place for the hoi polloi. While the couple desperately prefers to be part of the hoi oligoi, they will participate in the festivities. There will be dancing, but no mariachi, this is Freesnow Alta Sociedad, after all.
The couple plans a short honeymoon at the Fresno Yacht Club to participate in the Regatta Races (see announcement above).
TIME CHANGE (Don’t forget to “Spring Forward” tonight).
Univision announces a “new” Telenovela, slated for that time-honored slot at 1 pm, daily (when, according to the NYT, only Spanish speaking nannies are watching.
Here is the original synopsis from Univision (which doesn’t sound very much like the one we’ve been watching since January):
In “El Talismán” a loving father who loses it all in a poker game, has no idea the far-reaching repercussions of his actions; ones that will forever change his daughter’s destiny. Trapped in the middle of an old feud symbolized by the powerful haciendas of “El Alcatráz” and “El Talismán”, Camila Aceves (Blanca Soto) and Pedro Ibarra (Rafael Novoa) will be the pawns in this unlucky game. He is a handsome and courageous man who, despite being cynical about love, cannot help but open up his heart to her. She is a young, beautiful and intelligent woman that can’t stop herself from loving him despite the uncertainty about his past. But when Pedro unwittingly becomes the man that brings Camila’s father to his ruin, destiny will turn them into enemies. Spinning a web of secrets and lies around them will be the handsome but arrogant Antonio Negrete (Aarón Díaz), along with his sensual and manipulative sister Lorena (Lola Ponce). They will do everything in their power to turn the odds to their favor and win what their hearts’ desire most – to destroy Camila and Pedro’s relationship. As deceit, betrayal, and confusion tear Camila and Pedro apart, only one question remains: will they find the talisman to turn luck in their favor?
Signing off, your faithful editor,
Anita
Thanks, everyone, for giving El Tal a sendoff from its evening place of privilege far above and beyond what it deserves.
I must say, though, I have thoroughly enjoyed this circo and will continue to record it for eventual skimming. I've got to see Evilra suffer! And find out whether Mariana still exists!
Observations:
Brigitte was wearing zebra shoes!!!
Antonio did not close the bedroom door before he, er, kicked it up a notch!
Tracy was using canned Easy Cheese and Redi-Whip for those super-fancy party treats that Evilra found so suitably snooty!
I love it. The show may be a mess, but the details are fun.
I must say, though, I have thoroughly enjoyed this circo and will continue to record it for eventual skimming. I've got to see Evilra suffer! And find out whether Mariana still exists!
Observations:
Brigitte was wearing zebra shoes!!!
Antonio did not close the bedroom door before he, er, kicked it up a notch!
Tracy was using canned Easy Cheese and Redi-Whip for those super-fancy party treats that Evilra found so suitably snooty!
I love it. The show may be a mess, but the details are fun.
I can't believe I missed the spray cheese. Probably because I was only half paying attention. I'm sticking with this though. I need the laughs and am dying to find out where Mariana's been!
Kelly
Kelly
Permalink posted by : Sunday, March 11, 2012 at 1:37:00 AM EST
: Sunday, March 11, 2012 at 1:37:00 AM EST
Hey everybody! I still can't believe what a hot mess this show was. But still I feel bad for everyone involved with it. Surely they knew it was awful?
Anita thank you for the issue of FUG. I'm also hoping to get to the close out sale at Tal*Mart today.
So Marta- you are doing the Monday recap of Avocado Pit of Passion? As I said , I'm willing to take a day but right now Tuesdays and Thursdays aren't the best. If need be I will figure something out tho. I've just been waiting for final word from El Tal recappers and TPTB.
Anita thank you for the issue of FUG. I'm also hoping to get to the close out sale at Tal*Mart today.
So Marta- you are doing the Monday recap of Avocado Pit of Passion? As I said , I'm willing to take a day but right now Tuesdays and Thursdays aren't the best. If need be I will figure something out tho. I've just been waiting for final word from El Tal recappers and TPTB.
I still don't see a list of recappers for abismos on the left but i am assuming the concensus is that the ElTal recappers will move to Abismo... not sure but if someone can do fridays and can't do any other weekday, i can stay with wednesdays... but where do I put the monday recap? i dont see a forum for abismos...
Great list, Anita! as always.
Anita, NM, et al...
Abismo is full of old telenovela cliches so there will be plenty of material to do the sale flyers, newspaper headlines, book lists, etc to build from... hopefully there will also be a more decent script/progress of storyline and acting to rave about... a good portion of the cast is well established talents... can't wait to see some of those together on screen.
Anita, NM, et al...
Abismo is full of old telenovela cliches so there will be plenty of material to do the sale flyers, newspaper headlines, book lists, etc to build from... hopefully there will also be a more decent script/progress of storyline and acting to rave about... a good portion of the cast is well established talents... can't wait to see some of those together on screen.
Look at it this way - we now have a bottom limit to which we can compare future TNs. Perhaps this will be El Tal's gift to Caray Caray.
Did you set your clocks for Daylight Savings Time?
Did you set your clocks for Daylight Savings Time?
Great observations, Julia! I only noticed the door open, and I wish I'd seen those other two, especially the CheezWhiz. It was funny enough that Elvira was impactada finding out Tracy was the cook, but that the gourmet food was Cheezwhiz? lol
Anita - Our last issue of FUG is delightful! The cliches are a hoot. I LOVE the wedding article. Hysterical!
How funny to re-read the original synopsis. The answer is NO. No, they did not find El Talisman to turn luck in their favor.
Sara - Somehow I think the actors are shocked at how bad it ended up. Really, the acting and storylines aren't awful. It's the editing, and splicing and chopping and repeating. When the actors did Take 1, Take 2, Take 3, they never dreamed ALL of the takes would be shown ad nauseum.
Apparantly my family is the one buying up all the zebra print at Tal*Mart. My daughter's makeup bag is zebra and my son's gf is wearing a zebra dress in a recent picture. I never even noticed til this week.
R la O
Anita - Our last issue of FUG is delightful! The cliches are a hoot. I LOVE the wedding article. Hysterical!
How funny to re-read the original synopsis. The answer is NO. No, they did not find El Talisman to turn luck in their favor.
Sara - Somehow I think the actors are shocked at how bad it ended up. Really, the acting and storylines aren't awful. It's the editing, and splicing and chopping and repeating. When the actors did Take 1, Take 2, Take 3, they never dreamed ALL of the takes would be shown ad nauseum.
Apparantly my family is the one buying up all the zebra print at Tal*Mart. My daughter's makeup bag is zebra and my son's gf is wearing a zebra dress in a recent picture. I never even noticed til this week.
R la O
True the storylines aren't awful, but they do seem a bit far fetched. Moonlighting at a brothel? Becoming a father at 14? Weird and a bit insulting to the viewer if it was expected to be taken seriously....if they were writing with the idea of satire in mind then that's ok. Sadly I don't think they were. I find it terribly sad that this was just so so awful. The premise had such promise. It all began to go awry when the choice of setting was Fresno. What were they thinking?
When the actors did Take 1, Take 2, Take 3, they never dreamed ALL of the takes would be shown ad nauseum.
Too funny, R la O! thanks for the sunday morning chuckle!
Too funny, R la O! thanks for the sunday morning chuckle!
About recapping Abismo--
I hope I am not giving away any state secrets here but I thought we, as a team, wanted to stay intact. And that includes Cynderella, still in the loop and still intending to rejoin us within a few weeks.
Sylvia was hoping against hope that UFCS go back to one hour, El Tal would be moved one hour earlier and Pasión would be added to the line-up. In that case, she would have preferred to stay with El Tal. I would have too. (As for EJ and her damned standards -- well that's a another conversation:D)
But that didn't happen. And since Sylvia won't be back for a day or two ...
... I'm assuming we gang of six are ALL going to pack up our belt buckles, zebra-skins, and salsa of many colors and head to the Pits south of the border.
And the schedule will stay as it is -- although we are still missing a sub for the Mondays Cynderella will be gone. (Although I do see that Marta has graciously volunteered to write-up the very first episode tomorrow.)
None of us is getting exactly what we wished for but the important thing is that we get to hang out together with each other and all of you.
I hope I am not giving away any state secrets here but I thought we, as a team, wanted to stay intact. And that includes Cynderella, still in the loop and still intending to rejoin us within a few weeks.
Sylvia was hoping against hope that UFCS go back to one hour, El Tal would be moved one hour earlier and Pasión would be added to the line-up. In that case, she would have preferred to stay with El Tal. I would have too. (As for EJ and her damned standards -- well that's a another conversation:D)
But that didn't happen. And since Sylvia won't be back for a day or two ...
... I'm assuming we gang of six are ALL going to pack up our belt buckles, zebra-skins, and salsa of many colors and head to the Pits south of the border.
And the schedule will stay as it is -- although we are still missing a sub for the Mondays Cynderella will be gone. (Although I do see that Marta has graciously volunteered to write-up the very first episode tomorrow.)
None of us is getting exactly what we wished for but the important thing is that we get to hang out together with each other and all of you.
Yay, NM! So glad to hear you are staying. You scared me there for minute. I have started keeping a notebook of the Spanish phrases I learn and you are my main source. So thank you.
"EJ and her damned standards" lol
What I WAS going to say yesterday is that hopefully the violence is behind this tn and the new daytime viewers will be coming in at a good and more enjoyable time. But then Antonio bloodied Doris' nose, so now I am concerned that it WILL be on during the day.
"EJ and her damned standards" lol
What I WAS going to say yesterday is that hopefully the violence is behind this tn and the new daytime viewers will be coming in at a good and more enjoyable time. But then Antonio bloodied Doris' nose, so now I am concerned that it WILL be on during the day.
I think we can all fit into the bed of La Viejita for our trip south o' the border. Nos vamos, nos vamos, nos vamos...
R la O, how clever of you to remember that I have floats in the side of my dress. I just have so many outfits...
R la O, how clever of you to remember that I have floats in the side of my dress. I just have so many outfits...
Permalink posted by : Sunday, March 11, 2012 at 1:13:00 PM EDT
: Sunday, March 11, 2012 at 1:13:00 PM EDT
I'm with y'all. See you in the south. We will be recording ElTal for a little while at least, and may even watch the recordings if we remember. Thanks to all the recappers and commenters for keeping the family together.
I'll take whatever you have on the 'Scratch and Dent' shelf in Tal*Mart, please. Is there a zebra bra, perhaps? We have seen everything else zebra, with the exception of a REAL zebra. Have to keep an eye out!
I'll take whatever you have on the 'Scratch and Dent' shelf in Tal*Mart, please. Is there a zebra bra, perhaps? We have seen everything else zebra, with the exception of a REAL zebra. Have to keep an eye out!
Emilia--Sorry but Brigitte bought out all the zebra bras. I think they are planning some sort of La Follie Berger number as a farewell to us.
Anita
Anita
Does anyone know when Sylvia is due back? Hopefully tomorrow. Otherwise I worry that she will miss the first few episodes as she wouldn't have known to record them.
Did you guys hear about the big spoiler Mark Cherry (Desperate Housewives producer) let slip? He is in a lawsuit with Nicolette Sheridan for wrongful termination and he said they knew they were going to kill off her character, just like they are killing off ______________. The problem is ______________ doesn't get killed off til tonight.
I am so glad this is a Spoiler Free Zone.
Did you guys hear about the big spoiler Mark Cherry (Desperate Housewives producer) let slip? He is in a lawsuit with Nicolette Sheridan for wrongful termination and he said they knew they were going to kill off her character, just like they are killing off ______________. The problem is ______________ doesn't get killed off til tonight.
I am so glad this is a Spoiler Free Zone.
R la O, I really appreciate the vote of confidence. Thank you.
Sylvia will be back Monday or Tuesday. Since Univisión airs the first episodes of new shows various times and also tends to make them readily available on its website, I wouldn't worry about our Cap'n falling behind. [Honestly, they're like pushers pressing free samples on kids in the schoolyard. They are experts in getting us hooked.]
Not only that, with Marta recapping the first episode, we'll have a superb and complete foundation for the snarkfest that is sure to follow.
With the "notify of follow-up comments" function deactivated, it is going to be harder for us to police for spoilers here. I really hope that "Abismo" enthusiasts are able to contain themselves.
That's one thing we never had to worry about with El Tal -- we were all in the same (leaky) boat. Where's Mariana? Will Meester Renato and El Viral get married? Is the check still good? Will Antonio and Pancho kiss and make up? ¿Quién lo va a saber?
Sylvia will be back Monday or Tuesday. Since Univisión airs the first episodes of new shows various times and also tends to make them readily available on its website, I wouldn't worry about our Cap'n falling behind. [Honestly, they're like pushers pressing free samples on kids in the schoolyard. They are experts in getting us hooked.]
Not only that, with Marta recapping the first episode, we'll have a superb and complete foundation for the snarkfest that is sure to follow.
With the "notify of follow-up comments" function deactivated, it is going to be harder for us to police for spoilers here. I really hope that "Abismo" enthusiasts are able to contain themselves.
That's one thing we never had to worry about with El Tal -- we were all in the same (leaky) boat. Where's Mariana? Will Meester Renato and El Viral get married? Is the check still good? Will Antonio and Pancho kiss and make up? ¿Quién lo va a saber?
Marvelous recap, Novela Maven.
First I want to thank you wonderful recappers who managed to make this so much fun for the rest of us and obviously for yourselves as well.
I agree with you, Anita that this show may be finally finding it's voice, only to be banished to the noontime slot here.
I thought that Pedro finally hit his stride last night. He and Elvy were especially engaging as they played off each other and he and Renato were a delight as well.
I still see a great deal of promise in this TN and will continue to record and watch as a guilty pleasure.
I didn't notice the canned cheese but did notice Briget's shoes since ever since the abundance of stripes was pointed out, I've kept a keen eye out for all things zebra.
Of course I'll be tagging along with all of you as Abismo de Pasión starts up tomorrow. It has a lot of familiar faces.
Carlos
First I want to thank you wonderful recappers who managed to make this so much fun for the rest of us and obviously for yourselves as well.
I agree with you, Anita that this show may be finally finding it's voice, only to be banished to the noontime slot here.
I thought that Pedro finally hit his stride last night. He and Elvy were especially engaging as they played off each other and he and Renato were a delight as well.
I still see a great deal of promise in this TN and will continue to record and watch as a guilty pleasure.
I didn't notice the canned cheese but did notice Briget's shoes since ever since the abundance of stripes was pointed out, I've kept a keen eye out for all things zebra.
Of course I'll be tagging along with all of you as Abismo de Pasión starts up tomorrow. It has a lot of familiar faces.
Carlos
totally agree that it is a shame that it gets moved to the noontime slot when ElTal is finally finding it's voice.
I also agree that Pedro finally hit his stride last night. He and Elvy were especially engaging as they played off each other and he and Renato were a delight as well.
I still see a great deal of promise in this TN and will continue to record and watch as a guilty pleasure.
ditto carlos... sorry to repeat your wording ... i too will try to find space in my DVDR to tape both ElTal and Abismo, although the only one i will have as 'locked' is abismo...
I also agree that Pedro finally hit his stride last night. He and Elvy were especially engaging as they played off each other and he and Renato were a delight as well.
I still see a great deal of promise in this TN and will continue to record and watch as a guilty pleasure.
ditto carlos... sorry to repeat your wording ... i too will try to find space in my DVDR to tape both ElTal and Abismo, although the only one i will have as 'locked' is abismo...
Novela Maven:
Thanks for clarifying our recapping situation for the group. I had a long (work) day and am just now checking Caray comments.
To your point, dear NM, about my 'standards'. I confess that my fondness for recapping stories with something that approaches a PLOT is a serious flaw in character and shows a profound lack of imagination.
But look on the upside. It's true that we may have to have to dive deep to find the comic potential in Abismo that we had so naturally in El Tal. But think of it this way; Marta and Jarocha have both told us that this refrito was, at one time, a respectable melodrama. Think of the potential for new cast and crew to screw this beloved telenovela up? The laments could be loud and obnoxious (and, of course, deeply amusing). Although we are losing The Belt Buckle we are gaining Zepeda's ever-so-fitted trousers and scarves. We have discussed Boyer's gifts or the lack thereof; surely that will create some lively conversation?
Mostly consider trying to view ElTal at friggin' 1PM (not that I am happy with a 9 PM telenovela either). That timing could not be worse for this working stiff. Having no ability to resist temptation, I am sure I would find my self late to meetings and conversations with clients because I was sneaking a peek at El Tal during the day seeking out zebra patterned objects for my bingo cards.
Knowing that you may punish me for a long time, and, continuing to hold you in affection,
I remain your devoted
Elna June
Thanks for clarifying our recapping situation for the group. I had a long (work) day and am just now checking Caray comments.
To your point, dear NM, about my 'standards'. I confess that my fondness for recapping stories with something that approaches a PLOT is a serious flaw in character and shows a profound lack of imagination.
But look on the upside. It's true that we may have to have to dive deep to find the comic potential in Abismo that we had so naturally in El Tal. But think of it this way; Marta and Jarocha have both told us that this refrito was, at one time, a respectable melodrama. Think of the potential for new cast and crew to screw this beloved telenovela up? The laments could be loud and obnoxious (and, of course, deeply amusing). Although we are losing The Belt Buckle we are gaining Zepeda's ever-so-fitted trousers and scarves. We have discussed Boyer's gifts or the lack thereof; surely that will create some lively conversation?
Mostly consider trying to view ElTal at friggin' 1PM (not that I am happy with a 9 PM telenovela either). That timing could not be worse for this working stiff. Having no ability to resist temptation, I am sure I would find my self late to meetings and conversations with clients because I was sneaking a peek at El Tal during the day seeking out zebra patterned objects for my bingo cards.
Knowing that you may punish me for a long time, and, continuing to hold you in affection,
I remain your devoted
Elna June
I am glad to hear Cynderella will eventually be rejoining us. She is a fun recapper. Study hard, Cynderella, and we'll see you after finals! (Assuming that's what you are busy with now).
EJ, lol, I wouldn't consider it a flaw that you want to recap something with a plot, you silly goose that laid the green avocado. And on this last day I did want to thank you for making a stink on your first recap about the violence. We all felt it and your recap said it so well. I hope Uni read it somehow. They lost a lot of viewers over it.
Thank you to all the wonderful recappers. You were superb. Seriously. I bought a book of the best short stories of 2011 back in January and still haven't read it. Who needs to read a book of short stories when everyday we get a witty, intelligent and well thought out re-cap? Everyday is a short story. A short story looking for the elusive plot.
Thanks so much All!
Rosemary la Otra
EJ, lol, I wouldn't consider it a flaw that you want to recap something with a plot, you silly goose that laid the green avocado. And on this last day I did want to thank you for making a stink on your first recap about the violence. We all felt it and your recap said it so well. I hope Uni read it somehow. They lost a lot of viewers over it.
Thank you to all the wonderful recappers. You were superb. Seriously. I bought a book of the best short stories of 2011 back in January and still haven't read it. Who needs to read a book of short stories when everyday we get a witty, intelligent and well thought out re-cap? Everyday is a short story. A short story looking for the elusive plot.
Thanks so much All!
Rosemary la Otra
My dear Elna June,
If my careless words caused you pain, I do beg your forgiveness. Surely you know I bear you no ill will. How could I when you are possessed of such a sweet and giving nature and of such a shining intelligence that anyone would give thanks for such a friend and colleague?
That Miss Nájera and Mr. Ibarra will feint and parry many times before they post the banns and that the widow Nájera is one to whom the years have sadly lent no wisdom, are simple truths; yet Miss Nájera’s independent character, her willingness to defy the oppressive social constraints that weigh heavy on the fair sex in this the second decade of the third millenium, can but arouse one’s respect; that the Negretes are a pack of scoundrels -- rogues, blaggards, ne’er-do-wells every man and woman of them (save their hapless, unloved whelps) – that, madam, is the stuff of tragedy.
I confess, my dear friend, I find your meaning difficult to fathom when you argue want of plot, I would most respectfully and humbly beg to differ. There is, rather, an embarrassment of plot though there be, perhaps, a want of wit.
The inane and iterative speeches may challenge the sense of those who demand intellectual rigor; and the barbarity and lasciviousness in what is, after all, a comedy of manners, may indeed try the sensibilities of the more delicate us.
You, alas, bear both the sense and sensibility to suffer. Please accept my sympathies, my heartfelt apologies and my hopes that our sojourn in the Abyss will be a joyful one.
Your humble servant,
NM
If my careless words caused you pain, I do beg your forgiveness. Surely you know I bear you no ill will. How could I when you are possessed of such a sweet and giving nature and of such a shining intelligence that anyone would give thanks for such a friend and colleague?
That Miss Nájera and Mr. Ibarra will feint and parry many times before they post the banns and that the widow Nájera is one to whom the years have sadly lent no wisdom, are simple truths; yet Miss Nájera’s independent character, her willingness to defy the oppressive social constraints that weigh heavy on the fair sex in this the second decade of the third millenium, can but arouse one’s respect; that the Negretes are a pack of scoundrels -- rogues, blaggards, ne’er-do-wells every man and woman of them (save their hapless, unloved whelps) – that, madam, is the stuff of tragedy.
I confess, my dear friend, I find your meaning difficult to fathom when you argue want of plot, I would most respectfully and humbly beg to differ. There is, rather, an embarrassment of plot though there be, perhaps, a want of wit.
The inane and iterative speeches may challenge the sense of those who demand intellectual rigor; and the barbarity and lasciviousness in what is, after all, a comedy of manners, may indeed try the sensibilities of the more delicate us.
You, alas, bear both the sense and sensibility to suffer. Please accept my sympathies, my heartfelt apologies and my hopes that our sojourn in the Abyss will be a joyful one.
Your humble servant,
NM
Someone has almost certainly commented about this already but I thought it would be worth pointing out again how inapt the name El Talismán is for the ranch... at least for it's owners:
Matilde... dead as a result of a fire.
Bernardo... dead of cancer.
Estebán... dead of gunshot wound
Mariana... missing
Not so lucky for those... and not so lucky a title since the show was quickly replaced and sent to noontime.
El Jinx might have been a better name.
Carlos
Matilde... dead as a result of a fire.
Bernardo... dead of cancer.
Estebán... dead of gunshot wound
Mariana... missing
Not so lucky for those... and not so lucky a title since the show was quickly replaced and sent to noontime.
El Jinx might have been a better name.
Carlos
LOL Carlos, I agree.
either call it La Maldicion or Hotel California, where you don't come out of there alive... or you don't remember you were there at all.. lol
either call it La Maldicion or Hotel California, where you don't come out of there alive... or you don't remember you were there at all.. lol
I'm totally bummed about ElTal getting switched to 1pm. I don't have a DVR. :(
Hopefully someone will upload it onto Youtube.
I think the show is getting better and wished Uni would've moved it to 8pm and given the Passion Pit the 9pm slot.
Hopefully someone will upload it onto Youtube.
I think the show is getting better and wished Uni would've moved it to 8pm and given the Passion Pit the 9pm slot.
Permalink posted by : Monday, March 12, 2012 at 12:17:00 PM EDT
: Monday, March 12, 2012 at 12:17:00 PM EDT
If there was ever a sucker for tn punishment, that would be me. I'm watching the clock, waiting for 1 pm to check and make sure the recording device is operating properly and El Jinxo (gracias, Carlos) is really on at said time.
Can you fit one more in the back of El Viejito for the trip down sur?
Anita
Can you fit one more in the back of El Viejito for the trip down sur?
Anita
Dong--we've been toying with the idea of having the Abismo recappers post a discussion page for El Tal at the same time they post the Abismo recaps.
In that way, you will have us Die-Hards to report on any of the shennanigans going on in La Maldicion (i.e. El Jinxo).
In that way, you will have us Die-Hards to report on any of the shennanigans going on in La Maldicion (i.e. El Jinxo).
Dong,
This site has been showing "capítulos completos"
http://novelasyseries.univision.com/el-talisman
Anita,
La Viejita's not leaving until every single Talismaniac is on board -- especially you!
This site has been showing "capítulos completos"
http://novelasyseries.univision.com/el-talisman
Anita,
La Viejita's not leaving until every single Talismaniac is on board -- especially you!
I was programming my DVR to make sure I get everything and it kept giving me sassy messages about available memory and prioritizing. I think what it was trying to say is "Do you REALLY need to be recording this freaking many telenovelas?" Just be glad I'm not making you record all the "look at these dysfunctional weirdos" "reality" shows, Mr. DVR.
The truly sicko Negrete family is filling my quota for dysfunction quite nicely. It's too bad El Piggo didn't marry Evilra; she would fit in very nicely there.
The truly sicko Negrete family is filling my quota for dysfunction quite nicely. It's too bad El Piggo didn't marry Evilra; she would fit in very nicely there.
For the sake of the UFCS recappers I really wish Univision had just decided to show four shows: cutting UFCS back to an hour and keeping El Tal I the prime time line-up.
I really, really wish Luni would cut UFCS to one hour. Two hours a night is just too much, but I really like the show and don't want to miss it (I do FF through some of Pancho's and Chela's boohooing and ranting). Plus my recaps have gotten crappy. Two hours takes too much time and focus to cover and do a good job (though the team seems to manage somehow; I always enjoy reading everyone's recaps).
Elna June and NovelaMaven...love your Jane Austen riffs. Delightful reading. Now back to Pride and Prejudice.
I want to echo everyone's sentiments about Pedro having fun at the party. Loved the looks he was giving Evilira. Pedro is a ranch owner. I don't understand why Evilira looks down on him, considering that she was married to a ranch owner and had an affair with another ranch owner.
Hopefully Camila washes her hands of her mother.
Armando's not so bad, just needs to get from under his mother's claws and think for himself. What does he do all day? If he's not in school, shouldn't he be working?
Hopefully Camila washes her hands of her mother.
Armando's not so bad, just needs to get from under his mother's claws and think for himself. What does he do all day? If he's not in school, shouldn't he be working?
Permalink posted by : Monday, March 12, 2012 at 2:44:00 PM EDT
: Monday, March 12, 2012 at 2:44:00 PM EDT
Since we're all piling into la Viejita for the trip South, I thought it would be appropriate to revisit Kelly's comment from last week which cracked me up. It was posted later so some may have missed it:
"I too am impressed that Lulu knew how to open a hood, but her knowing which is the brake line is just too much. I know as much as any normal woman (I can cehck oil and point out the battery), but brake lines? Not a clue. I hope she got the correct one because the ride to TJ will be terrible without, say, the radio."
Thanks Kelly.
Carlos
"I too am impressed that Lulu knew how to open a hood, but her knowing which is the brake line is just too much. I know as much as any normal woman (I can cehck oil and point out the battery), but brake lines? Not a clue. I hope she got the correct one because the ride to TJ will be terrible without, say, the radio."
Thanks Kelly.
Carlos
Alright, all:
I am off to examine Sara's intro to the Abyss (thanks again Sara!) over my break. See you tonight or tomorrow on the new thread.
JudyB: HI, dear. See you over at Abismo, I hope?
NM: Amiga mia...I predict we will have too much fun over in the Pit! So glad to be in the boat (or whatever conveyance takes us in and out of the pit) with you, Marta, Cynderella, La Infanta Azul, and our beloved Cap'n Sylvia.
Anita, I just wanted to appreciate your hard work on FUG and compiling comments. It is a pleasure to be in the blogosphere with you.
Another packed day, gotta run.
EJ
I am off to examine Sara's intro to the Abyss (thanks again Sara!) over my break. See you tonight or tomorrow on the new thread.
JudyB: HI, dear. See you over at Abismo, I hope?
NM: Amiga mia...I predict we will have too much fun over in the Pit! So glad to be in the boat (or whatever conveyance takes us in and out of the pit) with you, Marta, Cynderella, La Infanta Azul, and our beloved Cap'n Sylvia.
Anita, I just wanted to appreciate your hard work on FUG and compiling comments. It is a pleasure to be in the blogosphere with you.
Another packed day, gotta run.
EJ
Does anyone know where our Daisynjay is hanging out? I want her to know we are moving south. Hopefully she will come back in the fold.
thanks for bumping up Kelly's comment, Carlos... very similar to what i thought when she was working on La Viejita and then when Pedro could not start it...
see you all in the new blog...
see you all in the new blog...
FWIW: I have BULLET-RIDDEN Highlights of this afternoon's "Premiere."
Quote of the Day
"Sobre todo estoy muy bien conservada." (Literal Translation--Above all, I am very well preserved.)
Anita
Quote of the Day
"Sobre todo estoy muy bien conservada." (Literal Translation--Above all, I am very well preserved.)
Anita
I just put up an El Tal header for this week. Go for it, friends.
Post a Comment
Permalink posted by : Monday, March 12, 2012 at 7:50:00 PM EDT
: Monday, March 12, 2012 at 7:50:00 PM EDT
<< Home
© Caray, Caray! 2006-2022. Duplication of this material for use on any other site is strictly prohibited.
