Caray, Caray!

Hello Bloggers at Caray, Caray, my name is Marycelis Pacheco and am a semi-regular commentator who loves and applauds your website. I am very glad I found it and please don't stop the recaps. Anyway, I happened across an esmas chat with Jaime Camil. I thought it was the one where he was chatting as Don Fernando but after reading and translating it I realize I was mistaken. Sorry guys. I did find the Don Fern video chat and am working on translating the transcript of that chat as you are reading this. Anything with a spoiler I will delete to honor the rules of Caray, Caray. It is a very short transcript because the site got overloaded and crashed. Anyway enjoy reading the following translation. I apologize if they are any spelling errors, I am working on my laptop using Wordpad that has no spell check because my MS Word is not functioning and my main tower is un-operational. Please forgive me for any and all spelling errors. As for the grammar errors, well I don't translate grammatically accurate.

As a preface, Jaime was a host/commentator on a reality show program called Operación Triunfo México that is a mix of Big Brother and American Idol. People living in one house/instituto studying and practicing music and are judged by a panel at something called Gala at which point it is decided if they stay on the show or go home. The winner of the show gets to sign a music deal.

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[Host]: Welcome to the chat with Jaime Camil.

[Host] Singer of vocation and soul, Jaime is a person with solid presence in the music world due to his great trajectory that includes radio, TV and acting in novelas and two album productions “Para Estar Contigo and Una Vez Maz”

[Host] Even though you would think one was talking about an actor that wanted to be a singer in reality he is the opposite, he is a singer that was given the opportunity to act in the telenovela Mi Destino Eres Tu

[Host] Actually, his efforts are centered in the promotion of his new album (Una Vez Mas) where he worked in the studio with Marco Flores and Kike Santander, whose single Dime, is already playing strong on Mexican radio.

[Host] Born July 22 1973 and a very proud Mexican, since May of this year residing in Miami Florida

[Host] Jaime was invited for the production of Operación Triunfo México to be the weekly host/commentator for the reality show, which he accepted despite the fact that he has to travel constantly from Mexico City to Miami

[Host] Although many of you will find it strange to see him as an MC, the truth is this cute kid started his career as a radio commentator and host of a program for TV Azteca called Que Nochecita!

[Host] A few years ago we saw him in the role of Mauricio, the unrequited love interest of Lucero in Mi Destino Eres Tu.

[Host] He also participated in a special program Diseñador Ambos Sexos where he became the rival of Jean Phillipe Martin (Héctor Suárez Jr.) for the love of Carolina (Luz María Zetina).

[Host] If you want to know more, what are you waiting for, start sending your questions.

[Host] Let the questions begin!

[Host] *

[TanyaLouise] JAIME-I SEND A BIG KISS FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY, I HOPE THAT YOU HAD A GREAT TIME!!

[Jaime_Camil] Before anything, very good afternoon to all the users, thank you very much for being here with me today.

[Jaime_Camil] Tanya, I send you a big kiss from Miami, thank you for supporting me unconditionally like always.

[anali] Do you think you have achieved everything you desired in your life and career?

[Jaime_Camil] Definitely no. There are a few goals I have to accomplish, I am only just beginning.

[22091961] Jaime, this is the first time I enter a chat, I hope you give me luck. A Kiss. –Ale

[Jaime_Camil] Ale there is always a first time

[cristy]How good is your relatiohship with Luis Miguel?

[Jaime_Camil]I don’t talk much about him in the press so as to not be misinterpreted but it’s been two years since I don’t see him.

[PATY]HOW OLD ARE YOU?

[Jaime_Camil] 28 years old

[NANCY]WHAT DON’T YOU LIKE ABOUT WOMEN.

[Jaime_Camil]Nothing, I adore women and I like everything about them, I think they are the most beautiful and perfect creation God has put on the earth

[ARREITARRAMAN]HEY WHAT’S UP WITH ALEJANDRA GUZMAN WHO SNUCK INTO THE LAST PROGRAM.

[Jaime_Camil]I don’t know. Alejandra is Alejandra. And if you invite her to a program you have to be prepared to receive the Alejandra that everyone knows.

[alejandrolcf] How is it living with the young people on operacion triunfo

[Jaime_Camil]Marvelous. It is a noble television project, very pretty and moving. It is a privilege being on a project like this.

[PATTYVERDE]HEY JAIME, ARE YOU PRESENTLY PLANING A TELENOVELA?

[Jaime_Camil]I don’t know, it would have to depend on the producer, the story. Since I am living in US there are more movie offers in LA than telenovelas for the moment.

[Jaime_Camil] That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard and I believe that once the children start going out and get interviewed, they better than anyone will clear up those absoured rumors.

[buho_con_msn] IS IT TRUE THAT YOU HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOFIA VERGARA

[Jaime_Camil]I don’t like talking about my relationships because in the end the press always come to their own conclusions.

[isik]Hello Jaime, say what went through your head when the OT judge started to talk about Alejandra Guzman and she responded with an uncomfortable comment to put it delicately

[Jaime_Camil] You referring to the "mother insult" I am sure …Well nothing happened I just simply tried to go with the program in the best way possible.

[intrusa]what do you plan on doing to raise ratings of OT?

[Jaime_Camil]Nothing OT is the original format of musical reality. It is an approved format that begins working around the fifth or sixth airing and it is very adventorus compared to a TV program that has just started to one that has aired eight weeks and has a captive audience. The press ventures much giving opinions too early,

[LORENA]HELLO, HOW ARE YOU DOING, YOU KNOW I ADMIRE YOU A GREAT DEAL, DESPITE YOUR GREAT CHARISMA YOU SEEM TO BE A CENTERED KID AND YOUR FEET ARE FIRMLY ON THE GROUND

[Jaime_Camil] Thank you very much. I send you a kiss.

[Morenasa] you have a girlfriend?

[Jaime_Camil] No

[edna_vasa] how do you feel being a host/commentator of a program. Kisses, I like you very much.

[Jaime_Camil]Like I said before, it is a wonderful television program and it is a privilege hosting it. Thank you very much, kisses to you too

[Piloto] How much growth is in your new album compared to the last one?

[Jaime_Camil] Piloto!! Shouldn’t you be in the institute? Hahaha

[Jaime_Camil]A lot of growth. I come with a mature voice having done 180 live shows with the last album. The music selection is greater and working with Kike Santander is marvelous.

[tania]How do you feel being the host of Operación Triunfo

[Jaime_Camil]Very good, it is a marvelous program

[barb]When you are you coming to veracrus to promote your album

[Jaime_Camil]Let me ask my promoter

[Jaime_Camil] Probably next week

[Leo]You should have been a comic, you are very funny.

[Jaime_Camil] Thanks Leo. I appreciate it very much.

[balliss]How is your sexual life.

[Jaime_Camil] On fire. Thank God and without complaints.

[patty]Tell me how would you want the woman of your life

[Jaime_Camil]Don’t know..simply that she be a woman, honest, transparent and obviously love grows through sight, whoever says different I think is lying

[dante]HEY JAIME WHAT’S YOUR SHOE SIZE?

[Jaime_Camil] 11 american.

[KEY]What do you think of the possible romances within the institute?

[Jaime_Camil]Marvaelous. I belive Mar and Rodrigo are starting to like each other and perhaps Judith and Paco are following suit.

[isik]Who do you think will be out? ¿Josué o Jesús?

[Jaime_Camil]Uff..Don’t know, tough question. But it looks like the phone calls up until now are supporting Jesús.

[gaby6]Jaime is it true that you are dating the girl that hosted the review?

[Jaime_Camil]No. Neither did I bring her in to work on the show like it’s been said

[nataly] [nat]Jaime, how do you sleep clothed or like adam?

[Jaime_Camil]I don’t know Adam. But I sleep with surgeon style pants and a t-shirt

[shujey] Hello, I am a big fan of yours and I wish you all the luck in the world. Kisses and hellos from Peru

[Jaime_Camil] Olé! Que padre, Hellos to Peru and a big kiss.

[Pochou]The truth is that there is no comparison between el Tacher and you, it falls short my friend..congratulations.

[Jaime_Camil]Thank you very much. How nice your comment because Alan is a great friend and when he came on TV Azteca he told me how I was an influence for him

[lissette002] Hello, you visiting us in argentina, I am one of your fans

[Jaime_Camil]I hope to go to Argentina very soon. Close friends like Cristian Castro have told me that it is a phenomenal public.

[KEY]You think that there is freedom in the institute to say your sexual preferences?

[Jaime_Camil]Of course. If they are not said it’s because the students themselves don’t want to say them. The Institute is not a jail and the students are not conditioned to nothing.

[isik]Do you have a favorite? Or it doesn’t matter who wins? (Although obviously you couldn’t decide who)

[Jaime_Camil] Truthfully, I was judge when there were 170 students, afterwards 71, then 39 and up until the last 24 and the truth is that the 16 that there chosen deserve to win I tell you with you all my heart

[tuzaa]Jaime, you like soccer?

[Jaime_Camil] Very much, I root for the Pumas

[Daniela]Would you have liked to be on Big Brother VIP

[Jaime_Camil]No way

[connie]Jaime I love your smile. You are a great host.

[Jaime_Camil]Thank you Connie, a kiss with all my heart

[CRAZYPOLL]WHAT HAS BEEN THE WORST SITUATION YOU HAVE ENCOUNTERED AND HOW DID YOU DEAL WITH IT?

[Jaime_Camil]Thank God I haven’t had bad situations. I think that everything I have done in my life has been positive in one way or another and I feel very fortunate.

[nelo] When operaciòn triunfo ends will there be another generation of students?

[Jaime_Camil]I hope so. I wish and the following year we have the opportunity to have a second generation.

[orion] what did your body feel when you heard about the news about gaby?
[Jaime_Camil]It was horrible. Truthfully because if you think about it perhaps she feels her career is over but in reality her career is just starting and it was only an obastacle that life gave her, I hope all the students that come out of OT, will see it in the same positive way.

[mayin] Jaime how long where you with thalia?

[Jaime_Camil] As I said before, I don’t talk much about my relationships but we had a very beautiful relationship.

[ALITA]HEY ANSWER THIS, WHY DO YOU MAKE FUN OF THE DECECTS OF THE CONTESTANTS IN THE GALAS?

[Jaime_Camil]I don’t consider Gaby’s hair a defect for example. But if you consider it a defect that’s your perception I simply to try to make it a stressful moment.

[volador]Do you think that the students in the academy are better prepared than those on OT.

[Jaime_Camil]Definitely no.

[Jaime_Camil]I know the supposed director of the academy real well and the supposed professors because I worked with him when I was at EMI music and the truth I feel compassion for those poor kids.

[OfeliaMaria]Why did you accept the proposal of ''''Operacion Triunfo''''???'

[Jaime_Camil]Because I love the project and I followed it a little bit in Spain.

[claudia] hello Jaime how are you? Greetings from Israel I want to know if you plan on coming to Israel?

[Jaime_Camil]Wow! How impressing to get all the way over there. I wish Lord willing

[aleskita]Right now between you and me you are beautiful and I wish you the best of luck in your future projects oh I am Dominican and I want you to know that you are welcome in the DOMINICAN REPUBLIC.

[Jaime_Camil] Thank you very much, I have visited a few times and I have had a good time.

[GEOVANA]why didn’t you continue singing?

[Jaime_Camil] ‘Ah caray! Precisely I am promoting my second album produced by Kike Santander that’s titled Una Vez Mas and therefore I continue singing because it is my life, I have done a lot concerts in the US and thank God, “Dime” topped the Billboard for several weeks.

[dharmma29]hello Jaime I send you lots of greetings from Noruega!

[Jaime_Camil] Ahí si la hacemos! Porque los hombres color frijol como yo, allá causamos conmoción, no?

[Jaime_Camil] There we go! Because men with dark bean color like myself cause commotion over there.

[chaparra] You are hot, greetings all the way from Canada

[Jaime_Camil]Thank you a kiss to the maple leaf.

[connie] What has been the worst sacrifice that you have made in your career?

[Jaime_Camil] Having to withstand the idiot remarks made by the media who say that it’s been easy for me because of the situation with my father or withstanding those people who think I am where I am because my career was bought. I have suffered through much to be where I am and I have accomplished this on my own merits.

[BenitoK]Wouldn’t you like to do a program similar to Que nochesita? Or is that over?

[Jaime_Camil] I would love to and it was a great privilege after many years people remember that program and even an honor that various programs have taken elements from Que Nochecita.

[monica_1]WHAT WERE YOU LIKE AS A KID?

[Jaime_Camil]Very hyper. My mom used to give me Valium to be able to take me in an airplane.

[carol]my boyfriend sends his greetings. He says what do you do to make me like you so much?

[Jaime_Camil] Don’t tell me he knows about us!!! Ha ha ha

[monica_1] THE SONG, “SI NO TE HUBIERAS IDO” IS GREAT FOR YOU.

[Jaime_Camil] thank you

[SPARKDNK]HOW IS IT THAT YOU DECIDED TO SING?

[Jaime_Camil]Mi mom was a singer. She came to Mexico and did concerts with Armando Manzanero. Therefore I inherited, plus even while studying I was always a singer, ever since I was young. But life has given me the opportunity to try the role of host/commentator and I didn’t’ want to pass it up.

[CARICIA] IF YOU COULD REWIND TIME WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE?

[Jaime_Camil]Nothing

[fany]Jaime is it true that in the singing career you have to make many sacrifices.

[Jaime_Camil] Very true. You have to make many many sacrifices.

[isik] You are not going to sing in the one of the galas like everyone else?

[Jaime_Camil] It wouldn’t be right because the Galas are the window for them to shine and for them to be evaluated by the jury although they have invited me to sing with them in the Mexican Gala.

[vane]hello Jaimio! I want to tell you that I too am a paisana and I want to tell you that the way you dress fascinates me and your look is incredible.

[Jaime_Camil] Even if I wear boots how much have I been criticized, Hahaha thank you.

[luisaflorean]Jaime tell me does any girl on OT catch your eye?

[Jaime_Camil] To me all of them are phenonemonal but Mar’s physical beauty is difficult not to notice.

[VaNiDoSiTa]What do you miss most when you are far from home?

[Jaime_Camil] My friends and the food.

[Jenni]Hello Jaime, you are very cute, how are you doing? What is your favorite song on your second album?

[Jaime_Camil] “Dime” salsa version, “Hablame” and “''''Te Amaré En Silencio''''.'

[Mike] Did it end bad with TvAzetea?

[Jaime_Camil]No but since they gave me the opportunity to be on the screen it is a company that I loved very much. I never once thought I would dislike them so much.

[adaa]Jaime with all do respect, as a request you should make the Sunday program a little shorter without so much tension, I get tired of watching so much.

[Jaime_Camil]I too consider the long pauses a little exaggerated. But good or bad, this is the format of the reality shows and a lot of people like the emotion.

[SIALIS]WHAT DO YOU VALUE MORE IN A WOMAN?

[Jaime_Camil]In any human being I value the transparency of the soul.

[JcAlexander]WHERE DO YOU BUY YOUR CLOTHES, THEY ARE AWESOME

[Jaime_Camil] A very dear friend makes my clothes on OT whose name is Gerardo Dragonetti and his store is located en Parral#26, Col. Condesa.

[lil] Tell me five cd's that you list to at home or in your car

[Jaime_Camil] Sin Bandera, Maxwell, Al Jarreau

[FERNANDA] WHO SELECTS THE JURY FOR OPERACION TRIUNFO?

[Jaime_Camil] The program's production, selects four permanent jurors and two invites. And good or bad, you don't know how much I have enjoyed the collection of jurors.

[blanca] JAIME WHEN IS YOUR BIRTHDAY, I HAVE SEEN YOU ON LA OREJA AND YOU ARE VERY CUTE

[Jaime_Camil] July 22 and thank you very much

[Jenni] Jaime what is your favorite country in the world?

[Jaime_Camil] Beautiful and beloved Mexico.

[chapis]WHY WERE YOU AWAY FROM THE SCENES FOR SUCH A LONG TME?

[Jaime_Camil] I wasn't away from the scene since I have been living in Miami for about a year and half, I have been on the scene but in the US

[tuzaa]Do you like the way Piloto acts because to some people he's a little crazy

[Jaime_Camil] He'll exagerrate suddenly but he's okay.

[yady] Hello I am a paisana of ANAIS and I would like to know your opinion of her

[Jaime_Camil] Excellent artist, excelent voice but if you want to make it in this business you have to let go of the family ties and relationships. This business you always have to le tit come first and she gives me the impression up until now the boyfriend has been first.

[patis]Hello Jaime I like you very much and I have seen you in the Sunday galas and the way you talk you is very similar to luis miguel, tell me are you friends and do you hang out together

[Jaime_Camil]He has been in my group of friends for more than 20 years and obviously in this group we have many things in common

[pamela] with whom would like to make a duet for your next album

[Jaime_Camil] With Lupillo Rivera.

[ruti] hello jaime, a peruvian friend writes you, would like to know when will you visit us?

[Jaime_Camil] I hope to travel soon to Peru and promote the album around those parts

[Pilita]Jaime..what is your favorite Mexican beach destination?

[Jaime_Camil]Perhaps Acapulco and the Riviera Maya.

[MACB] HELLO I AM FROM ENGLAND AND I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE BEEN AROUND HERE

[Jaime_Camil] Yes. Even though it they are considered to be cold, I have many esteemed friends over there.

[lupita] do you think that OT has had same success as BIG BROTHER

[Jaime_Camil] They are totally different programs and it doesn't fit to compare the two.

[gpemanzan3011] JAIME I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHEN ARE YOU COMING TO CHIHUAHUA

[Jaime_Camil] Probably next week.

[rocio] DID YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE IN THE PRESENCE OF ALE GUZMAN

[Jaime_Camil] Of course not.

[Juan0] Are there plans to make an album of OT and when

[Jaime_Camil] Aha! There is already on sale albums from Gala 1 and Gala 2, wherein you can listen to the songs from the students who sang in said Galas. It only costs 59 pesos and is so cheap to boost the album industry in this country and say no to pirated music.

[kittmush] Would you like to someday record any bolero?

[Jaime_Camil] Very much, the old time mexican songs are beautiful

[dharmma29] is it in your immediate plans to travel to europe?

[Jaime_Camil] not in the immediate

[estefany] jaime i ask you again why do you hate tv azteca

[Jaime_Camil] Because it is a television station that when I was there they didn't do things how they do now, for example they steal projects in bad faith and with pain; they make disatrous comments that are also destructive and I think they have failed in professional ethics, what didn't exist when I was there.

[sherleyche] JAIME HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR WOMEN?

[Jaime_Camil] That they are women is more than enough

[serena] How is it that you were selected to be host/commentator on Operacion?

[Jaime_Camil] The producer, Pedro Torres called me in Miami and told me that he had a television project and they thought I would be the only person who could host it. It gave me great pride and happiness.

[pamela]Singing in English for when and i note you have the look to make it as an american movie actor, that is hollywood

[Jaime_Camil] From your mouth to God's ears and Lord willing the third album we will have made the crossover.

[monica] when are your tours that you have planned

[Jaime_Camil] For the moment I don't have anything planned, but on www.jaimecamil.com is the date calendar and the page is in english and spanish versions

[anali] describe yourself in three words

[Jaime_Camil] Persistent, transparent and authentic.

[ROSY] Please tell Josué that I love him, that whenever he wants to come to Guadalajara, I will be waiting for him, to send me greetings to be happy, please do me that favor

[Jaime_Camil] With pleasure, but they are so stressed at the night Gala I think he could forget, don't take it personally

[guera23] hello chiquis, WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO PROMOTE YOUR ALBUM IN SAN ANTONIO?

[Jaime_Camil] I already went, Chiquis

[yuridia] JAIME CAMIL, IS IT TRUE THAT YOU ARE IN THE BUSINESS ONLY FOR FUN, BEING THAT YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO LIFT A FINGER

[Jaime_Camil] I answered it before, like I told you, that stupid perception makes me sick. I don't know why people that also come from families of position, like Enrique Iglesias , Cristian Castro or Alejandro Fernández, are not bothered with the same thing. Nevertheless all of us are where we are through own merits and my work and my effort is what feeds me.

[SyF] JAIME LOTS OF GREETINGS FROM THE CLUB ''''EL MUNDO DE JAIME CAMIL''''!!!!!'

[Jaime_Camil] Hello, how are you? That's sweet that you are all here. Thanks for supporting me so much along with Tanya Louise, I like you all very much.

[JcAlexander]THAT HAT IS COOL, WHERE DID YOU BUY IT?

[Jaime_Camil] It was a gift from a NY police detective, that is it is authentic.

[Eli] What do you like about your job?

[Jaime_Camil] Absoultley everything.

[Crisss] Hello Jaime tell me how are you in bed, steamy, calm, tell me how do you behave when you are initimate with your girl

[Jaime_Camil] Cris, for the love of God, this is a family chat!

[Host] Time is runnng out, therefore Jaime Camil will only answer three more questions

[Host] Continue!

[AleFan]What don't you like about Mexican TV and what would you like to see more of?

[Jaime_Camil] I adore all the Televisa projects, but more than seeing changes on television, I would like to see changes in the viewers, that they expect a little more from television stations

[909084] what do you think about the movie, el padre amaro, what opinion do you have about it, atte. diana

[Jaime_Camil] 'I have not seen it, but long live the art, long live the freedom of speech, and a lot thanks to all the publicity given by the demonstrators of "morals and good values" , because thanks to them, my friend Gael Garcia sold out all the entrances. Congratulations to the art of the Mexican movies.'

[Clase406] Hello Jaime, Do you think that after Operation Triunfo, your career will get better or stay the same

[Jaime_Camil] This career is of highs and lows, and to be part of this medium you need peserverence. This career is based on small daily and constant efforts to make it a success and you should never give up or ever think that a project will make or break you. You have to battle constantly.

[Jaime_Camil] I thank all the users that were connected, thanks to their affection and for supporting my career, may God bless you all, I am going to continue the promotion of the album don't miss OT. It like you all very much, Jaime.

[Host] Jaime, Esmas.com appreciates that you have chatted with us and we hope to have you here again.

[Host] Jaime Camil has left the chat room.

[Host] Thank you very much for participating with us in the chat with Jaime Camil.

Labels: fea

Ariel mocks Alicia for not having enough money to buy new stockings. He says 100 pesos (about US$9) will be enough. He offers her the money and grandly says he knows they cost less, but she can keep the change. She refuses the money, and he scolds her for being so disagreeable about his act of charity. (He takes the cash back, though.) Alicia says she can solve this problem without his money, and tells him to leave her in peace.

He leaves her in peace... for the moment, at least. "You never learn," Martha clucks at Alicia.

Ariel proceeds to spread his sunshine in Luigi's studio, where Aldo is sharing his Deep Thoughts about happy-dancey music with Marcia, Luigi, and (I still don't know why) Ricky Armstrong. "We were speaking of sordid and somber things, and along comes the most somber of them all," Luigi complains. "Glad to see you too," Ariel answers. Marcia tells Luigi not to be rude, and asks him to introduce Ariel and Aldo. Luigi introduces Ariel as a high-ranking executive in Conceptos. (Not true - Ariel doesn't hold a position in the company that I know of, other than partial owner, but considering how little Conceptos is worth right now, that doesn't mean much.) He introduces Aldo as someone who's collaborating on a very important project.

The two A's shake hands and, in answer to Ariel's query, Aldo leisurely explains the whole gastronomical tourism thing. Ariel makes a crack about this being Lety's big plan to save the company from the ruin she made of it; Aldo indicates that Lety wasn't the only person who played a role in the disaster. Annoyed that Aldo knows so much about the Conceptos situation, Ariel says that Aldo doesn't have a right to an opinion and no one asked him for one. Aldo just grins broadly and answers that he could have done this incredibly important project with some other agency, but chose Conceptos specifically (and solely) because of "your president," licenciada Padilla.

Ariel doesn't have much to say to that, so he tells Marcia that he needs to talk to her. Apparently, he means now. The two of them go out to the lobby, but Marcia says she needs to discuss a couple of things with Lety first. Ariel tells her not to take too long, because his matter is very grave. (Remind me again, what is Ariel's contribution to Conceptos? Oh yeah - he sucks up air, coffee, and dignity.)

Out in the lobby, Paula Maria is on the phone with someone, trying to get someone to drive her home, but his (or her) car isn't working.

Sara takes another call from the US Embassy. Flustered, she gets her English and her Spanish a little mixed up, but explains that Fernando must be working on something really important.

Ariel approaches PM. She timidly greets him. He touches her hair and says her new position suits her. She thanks him and says she's at his service. "That's good to know," he says. As he turns away, PM brushes his cooties out of her hair.

Just then, Fern emerges from the stairwell, holding the trashbag behind him. Ariel seems to have a fresh batch of insults ready for him, but they wilt before he can even get started. "Oh, it's trash," he says. He manages to wheeze out a remark about Fern having found his true calling - scavenger.

Fern laughs. (Ariel seems not to recognize this sound.) Fern says Ariel's great. Some of the best people in the world say they don't like Ariel, but not Fern - he likes Ariel just fine. He's funny! (He keeps touching Ariel's jacket. Ariel looks offended.) Fern explains about separating the glass, aluminum, cardboard, paper... he'd heard of recyclable trash, but he had thought it had something to do with bicycles.

I guess Ariel is used to these conversations. He says that if Fern wants, he can order someone to separate the trash. "A million thanks," Fern answers.

Wow. Just imagine what they must have sounded like when they were younger and even more immature. No wonder Teresita prefers Marcia.

Sara tells Fern that the US Embassy has been calling. Fern says he'll talk to them later. He whispers loudly to her that Ariel is the one who smells bad. He excuses himself and goes to his and Omar's office.

"U. S. Embassy, U. S. Embassy," Ariel mutters thoughtfully.

In Ren & Stimpy's, Pinky & the Brain's, etc.'s office, Omar is on the phone with Guillermo, setting up a meeting first thing tomorrow morning (about a month from now, at this rate). Fern leaps over the desk (without hurting himself) and takes the Big Chair. (Omar handles the chair as Fern jumps - I think it's supposed to look as though he's trying to keep Fern from getting it, but he's probably moving it so Fern doesn't break his neck. Just a guess. And thank you, Omar!)

Omar complains about the smell and tells Fern the embassy was looking for him. Fern says he was in the trash, looking for important things. Fern says it was a lot of work, but he found it. "You mean that's the bag of things from Lety?" Fern sarcastically calls Omar a wizard for having divined such a great mystery. He says he's going to present them to their owner. Omar says "over my dead body." (Like anyone could smell the difference?)

Lety greets Marcia politely, and Marcia says they have something delicate to discuss. Before they can go any further, Fern comes in, and hurriedly hides the bag behind his back when he sees Marcia. Lety greets him politely too. So does Marcia.

Marcia and Fern pause to mentally kneel before the Monster Ladyparts Seashell of Doom. Fern says he wants to talk. "You want to talk to me?" Marcia asks. "Not exactly," Fern answers. He says he's there to talk about the project. Marcia says that's great - that's why she's there too, so why doesn't he sit down with them. He says no, maybe we should talk about it in a meeting, some other time. Marcia sarcastically offers to give them some privacy.

Fern struggles to open the door while still holding the bag behind his back. "What smells?" Marcia asks. "Smells like trash," Lety says. "Yeah, like trash," Marcia sneeringly says to Lety. (What a shame Marcia never had a sister.) Lety sighs and rolls her eyes slightly.

Fern goes back into the lobby, cradling the bag. Martha offers to throw it out for him. Lola backs away from the odor. Sara is still struggling with her English/Spanish on the phone and tells Fern that the embassy is calling again. Fern explains that the odor is the smell of Ariel, and asks Sara (half in English) to pass the call to his office. (PM offers to throw out the bag for him, and he refuses, commenting on how helpful they all are.)

Martha says it smells like Fern's been eating rooster. (Maybe she means spoiled chicken.) And speaking of rooster, she's hungry.

Fern goes back to his office and Omar gets the big chair. He reports that Marcia was in Lety's office. The phone rings and they both reach for it. Fern wins. ("Snooze, you lose," he tells Omar.) Fern is told to wait. Fern drops the phone on the desk to bring Omar up-to-date on the events of the last three minutes.

Omar tries to play doctor. (Psychiatrist, that is.) He says Fern's problem, his conflict, is that he's not living in real life. He looks ridiculous carrying that bag of trash around everywhere. He reminds him that Fern once told him he didn't want anything with Lety. Fern doesn't remember this. He thinks maybe he was drunk when he said that. Omar disagrees. Fern says he can't bring himself to throw the things away.

I think Omar then proposes to make a necklace of all the stuffed animals and give them to Luigi and dance with them. (I'm sure I've mangled this.) "Not only are you a pervert, you're kind of gay," Fern tells him. Because of the way he dances. Omar says he's dancing like Luigi. And he says that if Fern wants to get Lety out of his system, he has to start by getting rid of all this junk.

Omar takes a CarvaHallmark out of the bag and begins mocking Fern, "mi Lety, mi Lety, I can't live without you," blah blah blah.

Omar asks Fern if he still thinks he has a chance with Lety. Fern says no... he says it's different than before. It's changed. He's not going to fight. He's got to start getting rid of the ghost of Lety. Omar gives him the bag and tells him he knows what he needs to do.

In Lety's office, Marcia accuses Lety of going back on her word. The cuartel knows the whole incredible, sad story about Lety and Fernando. She thought Lety was a woman of integrity, but what did she expect from a woman who would seduce someone's fiance. Surely Lety was dying to tell the secretaries all the rich details of what had happened.

Lety denies telling them anything, doesn't know how they would know about that stupid story. She says it's too painful for her, and she's left it in the past. Marcia asks if Lety has forgotten what happened. Lety repeats that she's left it in the past. She'll talk to the cuartel and find out what happened.

Marcia says they have very precise information, and were saying that she broke her engagement with Fern because of Lety.

Lety is surprised to hear this. Marcia angrily asks what did she think after she "presented" her with all the gifts and cards Fern had given her. (Funny, that's not how I remember it. How I remember it is that Marcia demanded that Lety show these things to her or else she'd call security and then Lety would have to deal with the wrath of Celso. Lety was kind enough to insist that they open the bag in private, instead of out in the lobby in front of all the nosy secretaries.)

What do you know - Lety remembers it the same way I do. She was not, and is not, interested in letting the cuartel in on the whole story. She asks Marcia if she's forgotten that she had accused Lety of stealing. Marcia suddenly doesn't want to pursue this angle anymore. Go figure.

Lety promises to straighten it all out. Marcia seems annoyed that this will happen "later." Marcia, if there's a time machine around that Lety can use to get this done "earlier," please speak up.

Lety tells Marcia she wants to have a quick meeting, right now, to discuss progress on the project. (Luigi is the only person who can possibly have anything to report!) Marcia sarcastically agrees to show up. Nice to see some enthusiasm for not ending up in the poorhouse, Marc!

Two seconds later, most of the gang (minus Aldo, Omar, and Fern) is in the boardroom. Luigi is giddily enthusiastic and calls Lety "Pre Pre." He explains that it's "precious president." He giggles. He's made lots of progress with Ricky, Caro, and Marcia. Ricky is also giddy and talks about a slogan, logo, music, etc. and does a goofy impression of Luigi. Luigi says they've also worked out the general concept.

I just noticed - I can't see Carolina's highlights. :-(

Fern and Omar show up. Fern tries to take his usual seat between Marcia and Tomas, but everyone reacts to the terrible odor clinging to him. Caro fans the air - yes, she's got a fan too, in addition to the pseudo-kimono and chopsticks.

Oh, ugh, I can almost smell it myself. Wait... I do smell something. Ew, Polly! Jeez!! (My dog has the most exquisite timing!)

Fern reveals that he has not accomplished anything, although it takes him a lot of time (and words, including "gastrological") to explain that. Lety gapes at him as he babbles about nothing. Omar adds that he's set up a meeting with Guillermo for tomorrow.

Lety hands out other assignments. She and Tomas are going to do a budget. She asks Marcia to contact some directors to work with Luigi. Fern reiterates that he and Omar will meet with Guillermo. There are more odor complaints. Fern says his lunch disagreed with him.

Omar is on the phone with Guillermo in his office, saying he'll be at the meeting tomorrow. As he hangs up, Alicia comes in (wearing her new stockings) and says she's cancelled all of her evening's plans to have dinner with him, just as she promised. He says that's too bad, because he's waiting for someone else to confirm a date with him. Alicia asks if it's with a woman. Luigi comes in and tries to kick her out. She shoves him out of the way and offers to be Aldo's second choice (not in so many words) for dinner. He agrees, and Luigi throws her out. He warns Aldo that she's trying to trap him.

Luigi gets a call from Ruli. He leaves to take it in his studio. "It's a zoo," Aldo laughs to himself.

Luigi tells Ruli about Aldo. He's not posessive or controlling. He's like Ruli... at the beginning of their relationship. (Irma, the involuntary eavesdropper, rolls her eyes.) Apparently, Ruli needs to be reminded that he was once understanding, sensitive, not jealous or controlling; loyal, empathetic, tolerant... but he has slowly become a big control freak, just like all men. Luigi asks for just one reason he's ever given Ruli to be that way.

Luigi sends Irma out of the room on an errand. As soon as she's gone, he has a hissy fit, saying he's always behaved well with Ruli, and doesn't deserve to be treated this way. (He stamps his foot.)

Alicia goes back to her desk, and I notice that the chalk line got wiped off the floor. Did I miss something? Who cleaned that up?

Lola's phone rings. "What do you want, homewrecker?" Jazmin is calling to say that Sanchez is here for Lola. Lola nervously wonders what this could mean. PM thinks Sanchez's visit is just an excuse to see his new giiiiiiirlfriend. They all giggle at Sara and joke about the differences in their heights and ages.

Lola doesn't want to go down there and see him, but Sara reminds her of the dangerous new receptionist downstairs. Lola rushes away to meet her fate.

Marcia finally meets with Ariel. He whines about having to wait, and complains about Aldo. Marcia says she likes him okay, and asks what Ariel's grave situation is. They closed the stockbrokers' office (literally, "house of bags") where he's been working. He's out of a job! (Quick - someone tell Alicia so she can punch him next time he approaches her!) He's going to look for another job, but until then, he's got a cash flow problem.

(I laugh. Time passes. Still laughing. Try to go to bed, but can't, because still laughing.)

The car he's been using - it's not his. The money he invested - it's lost. (He blames Fern for this because he thought Conceptos was doing well and he could afford to gamble on something else. Idiot.) He reminds Marcia that Lety said that money had been put aside to pay the shareholders, right?

Marcia confirms this and says "Want an advance on that money? Fine, go talk to Lety!"

He whines that he really needs the advance. Marcia repeats that he has to talk to Lety. She's not going to do it. Ariel says if Lety could shoot someone, he'd be her first victim. Marcia agrees, but says her corpse would be right next to his. He complains that the only thing worse than losing his job, is having to speak to that woman.

Marcia advises her brother not to make fun of Lety. They are in her hands, and now she's a different woman.

Ariel thinks she's not a different woman. She's only where she is due to her errors and the circumstances of the moment. She's just as ugly and neurotic as ever. He sarcastically thanks Marcia for the "support" and leaves.

Caro visits Aldo. She warns him not to have false hopes over Lety. She's sorry to tell him that Lety is still thinking about, and suffering over, Fern. The idea was that she was going to forget about him, little by little, but now they're always near one another.

They wonder when he should tell Lety he loves her. He says he's going to have to look for the right moment. Probably not in the office. He invited her to dinner, and is waiting to hear from her.

Aldo says that if she tells him she's still yearning for Fern, he will fight for her. He wants her at his side. He will dedicate his life to making her happy.

What if she tells him that the only thing that will make her happy is Fern's love?
What then, Dimples?

A phone rings in Lety's office. She looks around and realizes it's her cell phone. It's Tomas. She puts him on speaker, and they talk about how great their phones sound. (It's a brand that rhymes with Granola. Their new car is a brand that rhymes with Bored. Their cell phone service is a brand that rhymes with... uh... MexBel.) Tomas enters her office, still talking on the phone. Ha, ha. He babbles, she types. I'm surprised the Monster Ladyparts Seashell of Doom doesn't send out beams to interfere with the phone signals. Oh well... Lety asks about the stockings. Tomas recounts the Alicia's Pantyhose Caper. He thinks the fact that Alicia eventually accepted them, proves that he's an expert on feminine psychology. Lety scoffs.

Ariel comes in, and I'm starting to wonder if there shouldn't be a lock on that door. People just come strolling through whenever they like. Lety says she's busy. Ariel says it's important AND urgent. Tomas excuses himself.

Here's where it gets weird: Ariel invites Lety to dinner.

Down in the lobby, Jazmin greets Sanchez, who is holding a box of chocolates. They chat and flirt. She tries to get info from him about the divorce. He says his business there is strictly confidential. A lawyer's clients' information is as secret as the confessions they give to priests. He offers to give her a photo of himself. She says the only thing she wants is to find out if Lola will have to sell the house and give half the money to El Cheque. Sanchez refuses to answer.

El Cheque shows up with roses. Sanchez says this is a conflict of grand proportions. Not surprisingly, El Cheque thinks Sanchez is trying to steal Jazmin. Sanchez says she is indeed pretty, but he likes Sara, and the chocolates are for her.

The phone rings. Jazmin doesn't answer "Conceptos" or something businesslike - she answers "Sí, diga." That's fine if you're at home, but not at work. Wonder how long she's going to last at this job?

It's Rosales, calling for Sanchez. El Cheque pulls Jazmin aside. She asks if he has to give Lola any money. He says no, but he thinks they can use Sanchez's interest in Sara to their advantage. Jazmin doubts this, since they're all so unkind to her. He urges her to make nice with Sara.

Back in Lety's office, Ariel says he doesn't understand why she's being so "strange." Hasn't anyone ever invited her to dinner before?

Lety says yes, of course, but never anyone who had said to her face that she looked like a clown, that she couldn't work for a production house, that she was an assault on people's eyes. Ariel admits that he's said all of those things at some time or other, but it's clear that she's now more put-together, and has something that's... very... how to say it... attractive. (This "how to say it" thing is something he borrowed from Aldo's speech earlier in this episode.)

Lety informs him that "this woman" is still the same person as before, and she can't accept his invitation. If he wants to talk to her, she'll check her schedule, and see if she has time tomorrow. Obviously, it will have to be in the office.

Ariel believes she wants to take revenge on him. That's okay. Check her schedule and see when she has time. But frankly, her reaction strikes him as childish. Lety says no, it's not childish, it's just the only way that she can converse with him.

Lety stares at what sure looks to me like a blank screen and says she has time to see him at 4 tomorrow. (I don't mean an empty schedule - I mean she has no windows open on her screen; it's just a big Conceptos logo.) He says that's impossible. He'll be busy all day. (Doing what? Counting all the money he's lost?) How about at night? She says they could meet at 8 PM. He asks if she's busy after that. She says no, and asks if it's going to take him a really long time to talk to her. He says no - it's perfect. He'll come for her at 8.

Lety says no, he's not picking her up. Ariel says if she has no other plans, there's no reason they can't talk somewhere else. Like at a restaurant, for example. Lety repeats, "I'm not going to go out to eat with you."

Ariel accuses her of being afraid, but Lety says she just doesn't understand why they can't discuss whatever it is in the office. He says she won't understand if they don't talk, and whatever they can do here, they can do in a restaurant.

Lety still resists. Ariel asks if she thinks he's going to seduce her. He repeats that he thinks she's scared. In spite of her presidential look and her confident voice, she's still the same insecure woman as always.

Lety says, "Well, that's your opinion and I couldn't care less what you think of me." Ariel says that's fine with him. Tomorrow he'll give her the chance to show him that he's wrong. He adds, "I'll come for you at 8. ON TIME." Lety grinds her teeth as Ariel leaves her office.

It's going-home time. Alicia prances around the lobby with her makeup palette. The cuartel makes fun of her new stockings and ask if they're used. Alicia says she'd die before wearing used stockings. As they all pile into the elevator, they warn her not to tear her new ones as well.

They get down to the main lobby, where Lola has to be restrained when she sees El Cheque. Sara approaches Sanchez, who is so excited to see her, he fails to hang up the phone nicely and merely throws it in Jazmin's general direction. (Again, I wonder what the phone budget is like for this show. The only other TV character I can remember who was nearly as rough on phones was Steve McGarrett.)

Lola tries to talk to Sanchez about the divorce, but he only has eyes for Sara. El Cheque tries to get Sara's attention and calls Sanchez a slob, but Sara ignores him. Lola asks how he can call Sanchez a slob. There is more talk, and multiple parties encourage Sanchez to give the chocolates to Sara. He gives them to her and says sweet things. Sara makes a face that looks like a cross between puckering up, and disgust.

Tomas catches Alicia openly inspecting her stockings. He says they fit her well, and she yells at him for looking at her legs. He says he gave her those stockings with great fondness. She says she only took them because it's an emergency. She'll pay him back tomorrow.

Ariel notices the new stockings too. He asks where they came from. Maybe a female friend loaned them? Alicia is outraged by the suggestion. He says sorry, he forgot - she doesn't have any friends. She protests - it's not that, it's just that she would never wear used stockings.

He conjectures that someone must have given them to her as a gift. Does she have a boyfriend? Is he here, around Conceptos? Alicia steals a nervous glance at Tomas, who is grinning and wiggling his eyebrows hopefully, and says no. (Tomas looks surprised.) Or, maybe it's a lover? A secret lover, who has lots of money? He's told her about his friends that have so much money, and great resources to solve her problems...

"Ariel, please, no more." Alicia looks ready to cry.

I can't wait till she finds out he's almost as broke as she is.

---

Monday
Tomas risks life and limb defending Alicia against Ariel's insults.
Aldo risks life and limb defending Tomas against Ariel's wrath.
Lety pauses in her typing.

Later
Ariel takes Lety to Le Noir, crushes a waiter and eats him whole, then slithers away, leaving Lety to pay the bill.

Useful vocabulary words:
pepenador=scavenger
casa de bolsa=stockbrokers' office
fusilar=to shoot
fingir=to feign (actually heard this in tonight's Mundo, not La Fea, but I really liked it!)

Labels: fea

We open with a repeat of yesterday's episode, in which Diana walks into to Victor Bracho's office. "Good news! After less than 24 hours of stellar performance, you have earned yourself a raise! I'm the owner of this fine establishment and can do as I please." I think this is the "import business'" version of the casting couch. Diana says she believes in earning her promotions. "No hay problema," says Victor. "Do you know how to kiss well?" Diana, who seems to have picked up Larry's intellect, truly seems surprised. A wrestling match ensues on the desk. Just when things are looking truly bad for our beautiful but dumb heroine, who should "just happen" to drop by but Diego. God's gift to Human Resources. He hears the screams of his beloved, and bursts into Victor's office, slugging Victor. We seem to have a pattern here.

***Beefcake alert*** Max and Emili-Oh are at the beach without shirts, showing off their pecs. Where has Emili-Oh been all these episodes? Probably hiding under some shapeless suit. Max is doing push-ups on a ledge. Emili-Oh stupidly asks Max if he is still trying to see Diana and questioning Diana's true motives. "Yes I want to see her, but she wants nothing to do with me. She puts up barriers because I'm married. That tells me she loves me for my mind and not my wallet." "Are you wanting to marry her?" asks Emili-oh. "Yes, of course." Emili-Oh makes some comment, I believe, to the effect that Octave will kill them. Max says he no longer has a bull's eye painted on him; Larry has taken his place on the wall of shame by running off and getting married in Vegas to a servant. Gaby. Diana's sister.

The fight continues at Bracho Importing. Lot's of yelling. Who should appear but Mrs. Victor Bracho. "What is the meaning of this?" asks Mrs. Victor. Victor has some 'splaining to do. It takes all of a millisecond for Mrs. V to figure out what's been going on. Diego tells her Victor is a pig. Diana tells Mrs. V she's a new receptionist and Victor was trying to take advantage of her. Diego and Diana exit stage right. Mrs. V says it's always the same thing with Victor. "I'm tired of you making a fool of me." She then pulls out a gun and starts waving it around. By now the other women are trying to wrestle the gun away from her. Victor runs off and she calls him a coward. You can tell who controls THAT relationship.

Now Emili-Oh and Max are running on the beach, still showing off their shirtless bods. Max says he wants to take Diana out on his boat tomorrow. Emili-Oh tells him storms have been predicted. "No problem," says our feckless hero, "Imagine this, Diana and I trapped in the middle of a storm at sea. She'll be scared and I'll be able to take her in my strong arms." ***Eeeewwww. This is too disgusting to write.*** Emili-Oh (who I'm starting to like more and more now) tells Max he needs therapy. I couldn't have put it better myself!

Camila shows up in Andres' office wearing some skimpy leopard print halter, borrowed from Jos on Mundo de Fieras. A--"Did you bring the money?" C—"Well no. . ." A—Then you can leave the way you came in." Camila says she has something better, a bracelet valued at more than $20,000. Andres asks if it's fake. Camila says, "Any moron can tell it's real." Andres tells her to quit with the insults. He wants to take the bracelet to a jeweler for an appraisal. C—"Why don't you trust me? You don't think I'm capable of having a bracelet such as this?" A—"Why would I trust a woman who abandons her child? If you don't let me get it appraised, then I'm not telling you Diana's secret. Take it or leave it." Camila says "Fine, get it appraised. Then when you find out how valuable it is, call me and tell me the secret." Now here's a guy I'd trust with an expensive piece of jewelry and just his word!"

We're now at a family pow wow with Peyote, Octave, D/M, Bruno, Max and Yolanda. They are discussing finding a new nurse to help with D/M's therapy. D/M is campaigning to have Bruno help her. "What do you think, Max?" Max is silent. Octave suggests he is thinking about the nurse who's a thief. "What are you talking about?" asks Bruno (as if she didn't know). Octave delights in repeating once again that Diana stole her valuable bracelet. Max, as usual, denies Diana is a thief. This would have probably gone on all night, but we are saved by the doorbell. Max tells Octave "If you think you're in a bad mood now, you ain't seen nothing yet!"

In struts Luscious Larry, in that black jacket I love so much, holding Gaby's hand. I must say, his fashionably ripped jeans do nothing for me. You can tell I am no fashionista. Octave tells him to get out. "Not so fast, Mommie Dearest. I have an announcement to make. Gaby is my wife!" Everyone but Max is impactadas! Lots of "looks" exchanged. Peyote gets a huge grin on her face.

Diego and Diana are chatting in Granny's house. Diana thanks him for saving her from that disgusting pig Victor Bracho. Diego apologizes for sending her into the lion's den for at least the third time. "I'm always going to take care of you," says Diego. Then we have the usual conversation with Diana telling him she doesn't love him, him asking her to give him a chance, blah, blah, blah. He tries to lean in for a kiss, but she backs away. Diego begs her "Don't think of me as a friend, think of me as a man!" Right now I'm thinking of him as neither. After Diego leaves, Diana says a prayer asking God to help her forget Max and to let her love Diego. "The noblest of men."

Back to the festivities at Irascible Mansion. Octave asks Larry if this is a joke. "Nope," says Larry, "Gaby is now an Irascible!" "Never!!!!" screams Octave. After more heated exchange between mother and son, Peyote walks up to Gaby and happily says, "Welcome to the family!" The theatrics continue way too long. Octave says, "What do I know, I'm just the owner of the house." "As a matter-of-fact, you're not," retorts Max. "When dad died, the house went to us children. Larry has every right to stay with his wife." More theatrics as Gaby stands there cowering in Luscious Larry's armpit. Finally Yolanda steps in and steers Octave out of the room. Larry asks Lala to prepare a guestroom for Gaby. Poor Gaby is to remain the Virgin Bride.

Andres calls Diana and tells her she needs to visit Doc Evil tomorrow at the hospital. If she doesn't do what they say, they'll tell Max she's a thief who tried to kill Doc Evil. Not only that, what we say at your trial is dependent upon your cooperation. Diana tries to protest, to no avail. Granny walks in and asks Diana why she's so upset. Diana tells her about Andres blackmailing her.

Andres and Doc Evil gloat about their plans for Diana, when she meets them the next day. Andres says they have her in the palm of their hands. Doc Evil asks Andres if Diana will show. "Oh, she'll be here alright!" says Andres confidently. They high-five one another as visions of Diana dance in their heads.

Now Octave is ranting to Yolanda about Larry. Peyote is in the room with them smirking. Octave is wearing some tight-fitting white jacket that doesn't close in the front. As far as I can tell, she is not wearing a camisole or anything else under it. Octave is raving about Larry embarrassing the family, etc. Peyote steps in and tells Octave she thinks it's great that Larry married a servant. This is the new millennium, come join us. "No one cares about these sorts of things any more. Quit taking your frustrations out on us!" The fight escalates and Octave hauls off and slaps Peyote. The bell rings, they come out swinging and the fight is on! Lots of slapping and arms flailing, as they go crashing onto the bed. Octave is not wearing the type of clothes to be doing this sort of activity. Larry and Max run in and try to pull the combatants to opposite corners. Peyote tells Octave she's crazy. Finally Peyote storms out, just about knocking over the television camera as she runs by. In fact, she may have knocked it over because now another camera is on Octave. Octave screams "You are not my children!!!!"

Bruno and D/M are marveling at everything that has transpired this evening. Peyote stomps down the stairs yelling about her mom needing a straight jacket. Meanwhile, Octave is now yelling at Max and Larry. Max tells her she's being hysterical. "You're dang right I am. First a filthy nurse and now a servant! Where have I gone wrong?!" Octave is apoplectic. She finally collapses and Larry and Max carry her to the bed.

Lala and Gaby are in the guestroom listening to the fight. Finally all is quiet in Octave's room. Gaby confesses to Lala about how Larry whisked her off her feet to Las Vegas to get married, but then dumped her in the hotel room while he drank himself into a stupor in the bar. Gaby says she feels wretched about the whole experience.

Diana and Granny are still discussing Diana's predicament. Granny tells Diana not to go to the hospital alone. Diana says something about Diego being volatile. Diana says she has to confront Andres and Doc Evil alone and face her destiny.

D/M is doing her usual nasally whine to Bruno about how Diana has ruined everything between her and Max. Now that Gaby is an Irascible, Diana will inevitably come back to the house. Bruno tells D/M that Octave will never allow it. D/M responds that Octave is all bark and no bite. It's going to be up to D/M to destroy Diana.

Isabel is trying to get the RM (the real Marfil) to eat. Marfil tells Isabel how evil her twin sister is and that Deborah will never let Marfil resume her place as Max's wife. Debora is capable of murder. Isabel doesn't believe it. Besides, Bruno would never let it happen. RM suggests a deal. RM has a boatload of money in the bank, that Max put in her name. If Isabel gives her physical therapy and helps her walk again, she will reward Isabel handsomely.

Some how Octave has changed into a black Frederick's of Hollywood negligee. Max, Larry and Yolanda are still in her room. I'm not quite sure who all was involved with this change of costume. They talk her into getting some sleep. O tells Larry she'll never forgive him for the humiliation he has caused the family. Larry apologizes repeatedly, kisses her hand and leaves. Max tries to get O to forgive Luscious Larry. It was something he did on impulse. Pilar drove him to it.

Peyote is walking along the shoreline, in the middle of the night, repeating "I hate you, Octave, I hate you!!" Suddenly, out from the depths of the ocean, comes the creature of the black lagoon. I swear this scene was stolen from some B-Movie. Make that a C-Movie. It is Pancho! Peyote couldn't be happier. Pancho—"What are you doing here, a society girl like you walking along the beach alone in the middle of the night?" Peyote—"Looking for you. . ." They fall in a heap on the sand and start rolling into the water. I'm sure both actors had a wonderful time removing all that sand from every orifice when the scene was done.

Diana is praying to the Virgincita to save her.

Gaby is sleeping in the guestroom when Octave jumps on her and banishes her to the servants' quarters to sleep.

Diana is leaving the house when Max shows up. She tells him she has a doctor's appointment and needs to catch the bus. He says he won't take no for an answer. Off they go in his yellow Corvette convertible. Diego happens to be walking down the street when he sees Diana getting into the car with Max. Mutual glares are exchanged.

Nancy walks in to Gaby's old room and asks if it's true Gaby is now married to Larry. "Sure is," says Gaby. Lala walks in and tells Nancy to go clean something. Lala asks what Gaby is doing in the servants' quarters. Gaby tells Lala that Octave threw her out of the guestroom.

Now we're following Max and Diana at the marina. Max seems to be the liveliest I've seen him. He's got that "I Feeeeeel Good" James Brown spring in his step. He brings her to the family yacht, which looks like a regular boat to me. She half-heartedly tries to make excuses…the doctor appointment…a storm is coming…but Max won't take "no" for an answer. The doctor appointment can wait and we'll be back before the storm hits. Lots of foreshadowing for the loyal viewing public. He sends Diana to the head to change. He apparently has Larry's knack for picking out perfectly fitting clothes for the Soriano sisters.

Peyote tries to sneak back into the house the next morning. She is clearly doing the "walk of shame." Her hair is no longer curled and she seems to have lost some of her makeup. Octave catches her and starts in with 50 questions. "Who were you with? Rene?" "No mom, I was with someone else." The conversation goes downhill from there and Octave backhands Peyote yet again. Peyote has had enough of being Mommie Dearest's punching bag for all the evils of the world and lets Octave know just how she feels.

Caramel is on the deck waiting as Pancho slithers home the next morning. "Where were you? Diego said you didn't sleep here last night." P—"I was working late. I didn't tell you about it because I know you want out of the business." C—"I want US out of the business." They talk about her stealing his clothes, etc. She asks if he was with another woman. "Of course not!" lies Pancho. Lots of flirting back and forth and talk of a future marriage. "I'm yours, all yours," says Pancho. Life is good in Caramel's little world. In Pancho's, too.

Back to the boat and Diana in the little bikini Max has picked out for her. She's referring to him in "usted" form. He's telling her to use "tu." Now he's getting all breathy as he's telling her he loves kissing her and tasting her lips. She's trying to deflect his compliments. The usual between these two dolts. She's worried about the storm. He's saying it won't hit until later. "It's a beautiful day" as suspenseful music plays in the background. Diana looks nervous. Max looks frisky.

Doc Evil is asking Andres where in the heck is Diana. Andres says he's been trying to reach her by phone without success. Neither of them is happy at the moment and they are vowing to pay Diana back for making fools of them.

Queue the boat with Diana as a hood ornament in her bikini. Max all smiles. Diana all smiles. Lots of sappy music playing in the background (namely Max and Diana's theme song). Laughter. More smiles. Looks of love. Etc.

The fight between mother and daughter continues in Peyote's room. Octave is wearing an extremely low-cut tight top. One sleeve is sort of capped and the other side is a spaghetti strap. Octave calls her daughter a tramp. Peyote calls her mom a wearisome control freak. Octave starts going through Peyote's drawers, pulling out clothing and basically evicting her daughter from the Irascible mansion. As garments are flying, out pops a bag of suspicious white powder. Peyote is impactada and grabs the baggie. More screaming as Octave figures out Peyote is a slut AND a druggie. Yolanda and Larry run in.

Larry is wearing some tight fitting yellow shirt with some sort of yellow filigree across his chest. I prefer his black jacket.

Larry is asking Mom and Sis if they are STILL fighting. I wonder what gave them away. Peyote tells everyone to get the flock out of her room and just leave her in peace. Larry carries out the raving Octave. Yolanda asks Peyote if it's true about the drugs. We then have a Public Service Announcement about the evils of drugs. Yolanda and Peyote exchange "I love you's." Peyote's makeup runs.

RM is sitting in the bed thinking about her evil twin Debora and how Debora will never let Marfil back into the mansion. Isabel walks in saying she was at the bank. RM asks if the money was still there. Isabel says the bank confirmed it. I guess their bank in Miami doesn't have to comply with privacy laws. At any rate, the deal is struck. Isabel will help Marfil walk again, with Isabel promising to not say a word about her therapy to Bruno and especially that "witch" of a sister. Thunder rumbles in the background and lightning flashes! "I will take it to the grave," says the soon-to-be-rich Isabel.

Back to sunny weather on the boat. Max wants to make a toast. Diana tells him she doesn't drink. "Don't worry," says Max. "It's only fruit juice." D—"What are we toasting to?" M—"That we talking, the weather is beautiful, the weather people were wrong, you look hot in that bikini, we're alone, this episode is almost over, we're together, and I love you. We're also toasting because I'm getting divorced." D—"What? You're getting a divorce because of me?" M—"No Diana, I'm doing it for me." He takes both their drinks and sets them down. So much for the toast—no one even took a sip! Sappy love theme is playing in the background. Max tells Diana he doesn't love Marfil. He's not happy. He can't stop thinking about Diana. He wants to kiss her. Diana with her usual half-hearted argument. Max finally swoops in for the kill. Passionate tonsil swabbing and not a Camila or Marfil in sight! The love theme continues.

After too long a period the credits FINALLY roll.

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This is recapper Alex's first posting. But as he was having trouble uploading, I am posting it for him. Enjoy (NinaK)
Warning: This episode has many, many short, talky scenes. (Note from NinaK--all the episodes have many many short talky scenes!)

We start today’s capítulo with a replay of Max and Marfil by the pool. Max, who has added “attractively serious” to his repertoire of expressions, tells Faux Marfil that he wants a divorce. She responds with that annoying, wounded piglet squeal and the glycerine flows. He has to give her a chance, she sobs, wait until she gets well. Her pleading crescendoes to a shrill, unintelligible whine that makes my hand just itch to slap her. (Fortunately for me, Bruna owes her one.) Max tells Faux Marfil that they’re adults and need to look at the present, not the future. She starts bleating about Diana; he tells her to leave Diana out of it; more shrieking and sobbing about the injustice of it all, or something to that effect. Bottom line: Faux Marfil is distraught and wants to die. Max tells her that she’s young, very beautiful, and deserves a man who loves her. Max is no longer that man. He leaves, and the fiera in Faux Marfil comes out. Stopping just short of turning her head in a complete circle and foaming at the mouth, she heatedly declares to the absent Max that he will never divorce her, never.

Back to Octavia and the purloined emerald bracelet: As she comes down the stairs with Yolanda, Octavia announces that she wants charges brought against the Soriano sisters. One, or both of them, stole the bracelet. Yolanda advises her not to proceed without proof and suggests that maybe Octavia just lost it. While Octavia insists that it was stolen, I marvel how her surgeon, hairdresser, and personal shopper all joined forces to make her look like the love-child of Jaclyn Smith and Tanya Roberts.

Faux Marfil provides a surprisingly welcome interruption by traipsing into the room in her kitten-heeled FM shoes, pushing her walker like a grocery cart. She tells Octavia and Yolanda the bad news. Yolanda (who inherited her powers of intellect from the same ancestor as Larry), asks Faux Marfil if she misunderstood Max. Octavia turns on Yolanda, blaming her for having brought Diana into their happy home. Faux Marfil resumes her faux tantrum. Octavia silences her and intones “The last word has not yet been spoken.” I wait for her to underscore this portentous declamation with a slow sweep of the arm as she “scans the house,” but she disappoints me. Bruja. Instead, Octavia assures our Whiny Blonde Weasel of her support. But Faux Marfil wants more: She wants Octavia to exercise her matriarchal authority and forbid Max to divorce her. Octavia darkly vows that she will never allow Max to divorce Marfil and marry a poor girl like Diana.

Back in the kitchen, with the horrors of the Bracelet Interrogation now behind her, Nancy cheerfully pours herself a glass of O.J. She tells Lala about the Truth Bomb by the pool. Lala’s not amused. In a rare display of perspicacity, Nancy observes that the Max-Marfil divorce is like something out of a telenovela. She goes on to suggest that maybe Gaby and/or Diana stole the bracelet. Lala is Outraged. She chastises Nancy by stoutly declaring that the Soriano girls are incapable of taking what doesn’t belong to them. Nancy looks appropriately chagrined.

On the other side of TeleMiami, Gaby brings Luscious Larry a glass of mango juice. He tells her it’s delicious and to sit down next to him because they need to talk. Gaby gingerly takes a seat at the end of the couch. He says he is sorry that his mother fired her. Gaby agrees that it was unfair, but there’s nothing to be done about it. It’s Octavia’s house, she can fire anyone she likes. Gaby could never go back. But wait. Larry has something rare and wondrous: An idea. She could come back as his wife! He needs her. Not knowing when to stop, he tells her about Pilar’s call for help. While it pains her greatly, Gaby does the Right Thing. She urges him to rescue Pilar and try to be happy with her. Larry nixes that. Pilar doesn’t deserve his help or forgiveness. He pleads with Gaby to to marry him so that he can avoid being trapped into marriage with Pilar. As further proof that he’s a romantic and sensitive kind of guy, Larry proposes a Vegas wedding, then removes her glasses and takes her in his arms. Does she cave? I think we all know the answer to that one, girls and boys. It’s not like Gaby has a spine, or self-esteem. And Larry may be a doofus, but he’s a buff doofus who looks like Brad Pitt with puppy-dog eyes and an oh-so-kissable mouth. Of course she caves.

Over at Bracho Imports, Diana has validated Diego’s recommendation by becoming an ace receptionist before lunch. Julietina? Ovaltina? Okay, fine, Tina congratulates her. Unlike that pack of zorras who preceeded her, Diana is intelligent as well as pretty. Diana recounts her refusal of Bracho’s offer of a ride home and Tina gives her a stern warning. He’s a wolf. Tina knows what she’s talking about. Her tone of voice intimates that she’s a wee bit bitter she doesn’t speak from personal experience.

Octavia walks into Max’s bedroom. His glistening chest tells us that he is fresh out of the shower and his blue bathrobe nicely complements Mamita’s black-lace-over-blue-rayon cocktail dress with the plunging neckline. Just the thing for a morning at the office. But I digress. They argue about the divorce until Max concedes that he’ll wait for Marfil to recover taking action. (Baaaad move, hombre. Faux Marfil won’t be tossing out that walker any time soon.) He’s not content to leave it at that, however. He informs Mamá that once he’s free of Marfil, he’ll be happy his own way. Octavia is not down with that. If Max gets married to that dirt-poor nurse she’ll disinherit him. What’s more, she will destroy Diana’s life. Diana will curse the day she ever set foot in Casa Irazabal. She’ll curse the hour she was born. There will be no end of cursing in Diana’s future.

On that warm and fuzzy note, we cut to Camila and Silvia, who are wandering about in a warehouse? nightclub? restaurant? I can’t quite tell. They have trouble seeing, too, although it doesn’t occur to them to remove their sunglasses. Silvia has an unflattering new coiffure. She must have made quite a haul when she raided Jennifer Garner’s wig collection. Anyway, they stumble upon Pancho and his henchmen, who immediately pull guns on them. Camila explains that she had called earlier about selling some jewelery. Pancho demands to see what she’s got. She hands over Octavia’s bracelet. Without a jeweler’s loupe or even proper lighting, Pancho accurately appraises it with just a brief squint. He asks how much she wants for it. Camila decides that she could use twenty grand herself to stock up on designer hot-pants and FM shoes, so she jacks the price up to $40,000.00.

Larry and Gaby are at the airport, on their way to Las Vegas. This is basically a filler scene. Move along, folks, nothing to see here.

Either I missed something or Diana’s proud resolve is as short-lived as her memory. She’s in the car with Victor the Wolf, thanking him for the ride. He goes from telling her what a pleasure it was to how incrdibly beautiful she is and finishes with “I could steal a kiss from you.” Like any self-respecting Good Sex Kitten menaced by a Bad Studmuffin, Diana is impactada. Victor persists, they argue, she threatens to deck him. This exchange informs Victor that he’s dealing with the Mucha Mujer variety of Good Sex Kitten. He finally claims he’ll behave and Diana finally gets out of his car. As she watches him pull away, who should jog up but Diego, the faithful swain who launched her on this glamorous new career. She gives him the Cliff’s Notes version of what transpired in the car and assures him that she’ll slug Victor if he tries anything. Gallant gent that he is, Diego does not hide his relief at being absolved of rescue detail.

Larry and Gaby are still at the airport. She’s having second thoughts, she can’t just run off without a word to Granny or Diana. He tells her again how much he needs her, blah, blah, blah, Pilar, blah, blah, blah. He leans in for a close-up. Can she resist those big brown eyes with the dreamy lashes? Could anyone? Gaby’s inner conflict is emphasized by the Glycerine Tear of True Dolor that courses down her cheek.

Max and Emilio are having a drink in Emilio’s office. Emilio asks how Marfil took the news of the divorce. Not well. Lala calls Max on his cell phone. She tells him about the missing bracelet and Octavia’s insistence on reporting Diana to the police. Max almost succeeds in looking attractively impactado and says he’ll take care of it.

Back at Casa Irazabal, Faux Marfil is raging to Bruna. The idea that that idiot Max would want to divorce her! Well, not divorce her, Debora/Faux Marfil, but divorce Real Marfil. (I’m not quite following her line of reasoning as Real Marfil is no prize, either, but Faux Marfil isn’t exactly the brightest fiera that ever bared fangs.) Bruna says the whole thing is the nurse’s fault, and we can see her all but salivate over the mental image of shapely Diana in her thin cotton scrubs. Faux Marfil swears to Bruna that that cheap little thing won’t take Max away from her.

Meanwhile, the sale of Octavia’s bracelet isn’t going as planned. Pancho tells Camila that he’ll give her $10,000.00 for it. She says no deal, snatches back the bracelet, and stalks out with Silvia in tow. Pancho tells one of his henchmen to follow them. He wants them to learn the extent of his power. The henchman enlists a colleague and and they set off in hot pursuit of our plucky ingénues. Camila and Silvia realize they’re being followed and make a run for it, just as fast and far as their pleather go-go boots can carry them. They make it to the parking lot out back. Cunningly taking a page from Agent Sydney Bristow’s book, Silvia suggests that they hide in the dumpster. They’re barely inside when the the henchmen come running past.

Cut to Diana at home, thanking the Virgin for helping her get the receptionist job. She asks that Gaby find something, too. She also asks that Gaby no longer suffer for her love for Larry. And come to think of it, she doesn’t want to suffer for Max, either. He belongs to another woman. With her to-do list for Our Lady of Unemployment all checked off, Diana turns away without so much as an “Amen” to address the absent Max. She wonders aloud when she will see him next, even though it’s better that they never meet again.

Max enters Octavia’s office. caustically remarks that he must have informants in the house. He warns her not file charges against Diana. She asks if that’s a threat and he affirms that it is. She plays the filial loyalty card to no avail. Max tells her he will hire a lawyer to defend Diana if Octavia persists. Max will defend Diana from Octavia, from the whole world if need be. They lock eyes as well as horns. They’re Serious. They Mean It.

Camila and Silvia/Lucy and Ethel emerge from the dumpster. For some reason having shredded paper clinging to their hair is more than alarming being pursued by hired gunmen and they scream as they claw at their hair.

At Casa Soriano, Diana helps Granny set the table while the dear old soul wonders what happened to Gaby. Granny leaves the room and Gaby calls, right on cue, to answer that very question. She tells Diana what’s going on. Diana is impactada and tries to talk some sense into Gaby. Baby Sis rehashes how much Luscious Larry needs her. Gradually he’ll forget Pilar and love her instead. She gushes on and finally a glum-faced Diana wishes her the best.

Meanwhile, Larry enters the Vegas hotel room. Evidently he has an eye for women’s clothing that’s almost as keen as Pancho’s eye for gemstones. While Gaby was on the phone, he was out buying her a wedding dress. She loves it, a low-cut little number made of off-white stretch fabric. All she needs to go with it is a pair of ice skates and a ticket to the Winter Olympics. Larry heads for the bathroom with a box of his own. Something tells me that he bought some smokin’ hot wedding briefs and wants to try out a few new poses in them.

Octavia is dining with the clan. She’s cranky. She has a perfume empire to run. Her MS Outlook calendar is with shady deals, industrial spy jobs, acts of sabotage, all kinds of mayhem. And here she’s had to spend the whole day dealing with hysterical invalids, thieving slut-nurses, and sons who won’t be forced into blind, loving obedience. Yes, Octavia has good reason to be a grumble-bunny. She asks when Larry is going to to get over his depression and come out of his room. Yolanda defends him. Faux Marfil isn’t having any of this. Larry can’t be the center of attention when he’s not even in the room. She decides to pipe up, artfully adopting the tone of a pouty four-year-old to signal her innocent victim status. Larry’s not the only unhappy camper at Casa Irazabal, not by a long shot. Max knows what’s coming and thinks “Oh, God, not again.” I’m with Max on this one, but Paola hasn’t heard about the divorce, so it gets rehashed for her benefit. Octavia and Max argue again. Yolanda tries to make peace. Faux Marfil apologies for “unintentionally” causing a family squabble. Max congratulates her on a job well done anyway, states that no one has a say in his business, and leaves the table. Octavia orders him to return, but he ignores her. Faux Marfil whimpers that she loves him, doesn’t want to lose him, and so on. Again, I want to slap her. Again, Octavia utters dark vows. Again, no grandiose, melodramatic gestures. Damn.

Back in Vegas, Larry and Gaby become Señor y Señora Irazabal. (The ceremony, much to my disappointment, was not conducted by an Elvis impersonator.) Afterwards, Larry carries her across the threshold of their hotel room, sets her on the bed, and tells her he has to go downstairs a minute to call Max with the happy news. She decides to follow suit and calls Diana, who is less than enthusiastic about this turn of events.

Meanwhile, it’s Max’s turn to be dismayed when Lunkhead Larry calls from the hotel bar. He doesn’t sound too happy as he gives Max the scoop. Max tries to look attractively impactado. He doesn’t succeed.

Camila and Silvia turn up at Emilio’s apartment. At least I’m assuming it’s his -- he comes out in a bathrobe and asks them where they’ve been, why they’re all worked up. Silvia almost spills the beans, but Camila tells her to keep her “spectacularly stupid” mouth shut and storms out. Ouch.

While we were sitting through the filler scene above, it slowly began to dawn on Larry that marrying the maid just because she loved him might have more serious consequences than, say, buying a new pair of Speedos just because they were on sale. The Little I.Q. That Could was working hard! Go, Larry! Aw, he’s sooo cuuute! All right, enough of that. Max runs down the list of reasons why marrying Gaby was a Bad Idea. Larry agrees all the way down the line. Unfortunately, the Little I.Q. That Could ran out of steam when it got to “What Next?” Max doesn’t have any bright ideas right now, either, so they hang up and Larry chugs down four fingers of Scotch.

The next scene begins with an ocean liner cruising by. Why, I don’t know, unless it’s carrying the drugs/guns/women “imported” by Victor Bracho. Either way, Bracho Imports is where we’re going next. The thirty-something blonde who explained the phone to Diana is now dishing the dirt on her to Tina. Cómo te crees, Diana accepted a ride home home from the Big Bad Wolf in spite of their warnings. That pistol packin’ mama known as Mrs. Victor Bracho would become a fiera if she found out. Diana arrives and is promptly busted. Blondie tells Diana that her offense is grounds for immediate dismissal by Sra. Bracho. Just to make sure she gets it, Tina spells it out for her. Victor Bracho is only interested in going to bed with Diana. And again, to my surprise, Diana is impactada. Did she really believe that Victor the Wolf wanted just a kiss? I’m sorry, but I’ll believe in the Satanic Duck that kills people foolish enough to put on the Necklace of Doom in La Estrambótica Anastasia before I’ll believe that! That’s just messed up.

Faux Marfil is sunbathing by the pool, wearing a red bathing suit with appliquéed brown flowers. (We’re talkin’ seriously tacky beachwear, enough to get someone “auf’ed” on Project Runway.) Not wanting to be outdone, Camila shows up in that staple of every Bad Sex Kitten’s wardrobe, the leopard print halter top. After a brief, catty exchange, Camila tells Faux Marfil that the bracelet sale was a bust. Faux Marfil gets agitated. We can tell she is agitated because she’s doing a darn good imitation of a Stepford wife set at the wrong speed. She rehashes the whole dreary tale of why she needs that money. Camila demonstrates far more patience than I during this rant and ends the conversation by declaring her intention of going back to Andrés and giving him the bracelet as payment.

And speaking of Andrés, here he is, in Dr. Evil’s hospital room. He fills in Dr. Evil on the deal with Camila. The good doctor replies that if la zorra de Camila comes up with twenty grand, ten of it is his. He’d like to shovel up the dirt on Our Heroine for nothing, to sink her, to ruin her reputation, etc., etc., but if he can make a little profit to boot, hey, why not? (He makes a good point. It was his idea to frame Diana in the first place. If there can be honor among thieves then I don’t see why there can’t be intellectual property laws as well.) After they’ve settled financial matters, Andrés and Dr. Evil agree
to show Diana who they really are. They will bring her down. She will be at their mercy.

At this point I feel compelled to tally up the number of characters who are panting after Diana. I come up with seven, if you count Bruna. Diana’s got her hands full, all right.

That would be Diana’s cue, but instead we see Sra. Bracho arrive, presumably at Bracho Imports. Her hand is trembling as she takes the gun out of her purse. Apparently she’s not such a fiera after all. Cut to Victor, who summons Blondie to his office. She comes in and is reduced to a simpering, quivering mass of jelly by his red-hot Bad Boy vibe. He tells her to send in the new telefonista and not to let anyone interrupt them. Blondie exits with a lewd giggle and smirk. Victor tells us that he’s going to take Diana to bed. This news flash does not leave me impactado.

Time to check in on the newlyweds. It’s morning when Larry staggers into the hotel room, fetchingly rumpled, tie askew. Gaby has exchanged her white skating costume for a white bathrobe. (Light bulb over my head: Ahhh, she’s la esposa virgen still! But that’s another telenovela.) After gently rebuking her Dream Husband for spending the night in the bar, she tells him she was worried, not knowing where he was or with whom. Why didn’t he call her? Why on their wedding night? (Why didn’t she just go down to the bar? That’s what I ‘d like to know.) Larry kind of tells the truth – one drink led to another, then another, and so on. He flops onto the bed, muttering, then asks Gaby to take off his shoes. Gaby obeys, needless to say, and Larry mumbles “I don’t love her…I don’t love her…” before sinking into a complete stupor. Gaby is taking the virgin bride thing pretty hard. Why did he leave her alone? He’s going to be the first man in her life, and…and…and the Glycerine Tear of True Dolor courses down her cheek.

Victor freshens his breath in preparation for his renewed attack on Diana’s virtue. Enter Diana. I haven’t been able to fully appreciate the unique ugliness of her dress before now. It somehow manages to look both frumpy and slutty, and that’s quite an accomplishment. Oh, yes, the plot. So Victor tells Diana he’s giving her a raise. He circles in on her. He’s the boss, he can give out raises after less than 24 hours. She moves over to the desk. She’d rather earn the raise first. He moves in again. She can earn that raise, all right. Diana hopes to earn it by doing good work, and she knows how to do that. Uh oh. Before Diana realizes that she’s acorralada between Victor Vicor and his fine office furnishings, he goes for it, pinning her against the desk. As they struggle, he tries to make himelf heard over the ominous music and Diana’s extremely loud panting, then decides “The hell with it” and kisses her with all his brute force.

Roll credits.

Labels: acorralada

Diana and Max are on the yacht. What a beautiful day, in spite of the predicted storm. More back and forth about how he is going to divorce his wife, he loves her, please kiss me, no. Finally she kisses him.

Yolanda is lecturing Larry about how he and his sibs are going to make her die of a heart attack. They should take lessons from the great role models of adults they have around. But Auntie, we have a right to live our own lives. Still, Larry agrees he made a mistake to marry Gaby. Yes, I can’t forget Pilar. I don’t love Gaby, and the worst is I never will.

D/M is trying to call Max. He left his cell phone off. He’s at the beach. She pouts.

More boring kissing and cooing between Max and Diana. She’s fed up with him. But wait a minute. The yacht is moving too much. Brilliant solution? Diana jumps off and starts swimming to shore! He jumps in after her.

Back to house. Octavia is fuming at her children to Yolanda. They will kill me. Larry commits the barbarity of marrying a servant. Max wants to divorce Marfil because he is in love with a nurse. Paola takes drugs and spends the night on the beach with a strange man. She is like a streetwalker. She’s disgusting. This is a curse of god for what I did to Gaviota. And I was your accomplice, says Y. We destroyed her unjustly. We took her fortune and made her a beggar. But don’t cry for her Yolanda. Here I am not exactly sure what she was saying: Something about God and vengeance, and no one but God can get Octavia Irazabal, I think.

Paco is looking at his picture of “Alicia.” I never knew if you loved me or if it was real. But my wounds and scars are healing little by little since I met Gaviota. Gaviota comes in. Are you busy? Never too busy for you. I need a favor. I need to see Diana and Gaby at their house.

Diana and Max manage to swim safely to shore.

Paco and Gav plan to go visit Granny and the girls when the storm stops. Gav says that she must see them because ever since she found out they work at that darned Irazabal mansion she is very worried. Paco says she feels they are like her own girls. She hopes that hers are doing as well. Paco says he would give whatever he could to erase her sadness.
He kisses her and she lets him. Gaviota, that is the first time that you let me kiss you. I never denied I loved you. You deserve someone good. You are wonderful and noble. Someday you and I could be together, but my priority is not love. It is to find my daughters and get revenge on Octavia.

Gaby is in her little room. Lunkhead comes in. He apologizes for his mother having put her there, but then says, well, maybe it's better if you stay here or we stay apart. He kind of chides her for letting his mother roll all over her (but of course he never defies Mom!). It's not completely clear. Larry kisses her on the head and looks up with a prayerful expression. Please God don't strike me dead for doing this. I have things to do. I will return later.
Poor Gaby. She looks very sad. He doesn’t even love me a little bit.

D and M still caught in storm. Diana is scared. It is dark. Don’t worry, says big brave he-man Max. I won’t let anything happen.

Back to bar. Lorenzo is talking about the record storm, but Paco isn’t listening. He says, oh, yes—for the first time, Gaviota let me kiss her. More mooning.

Diana and Max are still in the storm; then they see a place to go inside.

D/M is complaining to Bruno that Max went out to the beach with Diana. But this storm will ruin their day. But they could go to a motel. How I hate this “muerta de hambre.” This epithet keeps popping up lately. Although it literally means "dead of hunger," it is used for an insignificant trashy low-class person.

Isabel calls D/M on the phone. Is that Deborah. Yes, she answers, who is calling? (Our cleveridentity thief always on the ball with her answers.) It’s Marfil. Isabel is holding the phone to Marfil’s ear. RM says:
I warn you that I won’t let you steal my identity and my husband. I am the real Marfil. The true wife of Max. You are a usurper and one day I will throw you out.

D and Max go into a shack. Diana becomes hysterical all out of proportion. More don't worries from Max.

Back to D/M Well, my dear sister, she says sarcastically. How nice to talk to you. She throws Bruno out of the room. Bruno wants to talk to RM. No dice. For the first time we get to see this actress on the split screen. A double whinny.

D/M says RM should be happy that she is filling in. Your two years unconscious have left you stupid. I am watching out for your interests. You know Max wants to be with that gross, social climbing nurse. Now we get to learn about the dark secret from the past: Pay attention, boys and girls: RM says. You were always ambitious, and envious. You hated me because I married a millionaire. You envied me in school when I was a better student. You never forgave me because papa loved me better because I was better behaved. You want revenge and to take my whole life. My enemy is not the nurse: it is you. D/M says RM doesn’t know what she is talking about. Your two years unconscious have atrophied your brain. RM promises to come and unmask D/M.

Back to shack. More hysteria from Diana.

Granny is talking to Diego. They are worried about Diana. She is out in the storm--and with a married man, no less.

Back to shack. Diana is still hysterical, but Max wraps her in a blanket. More boring entreaties from Max. She drops the blanket and they start kissing. Max's kissing technique seems to me chomping on Diana's upper lip.

The twins are still fighting. I am Marfil--no I am. etc.
RM wants D/M to put Bruno on the phone. She always helps me. Well, too bad. Bruno is a two-face. RM says, I hate you, Deborah for what you have done. Pudrete! (rot away). RM enlists Isabel to help her get up and get back to unmask the imposter.

Diana lying with Max in shack. I told you that I won’t let anything happen to you. But you are married. Don’t say her name. At this moment it is “sale sobrando.” (This apparently means "not necessary." More mush and lip chomping.

Bruno, having been gratuitously humiliated by D/M, goes to the servants quarters to gratuitously humiliate someone even lower: Gaby. Just because you have married an Irazabal doesn’t mean you have risen above me. Ha! Etc. You will continue to be a “muerta de hambre.” Gaby begs for mercy, but no. You don’t even have the power to get your husband to come to bed. (Ouch, that hurts, esp. coming from a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman.)

Larry is lying on his bed and looking at picture of Pilar. I can’t hate you. If you came back I would take you back.

D/M still threatening that RM won’t get back into the house.

Back to the little house. Andres is there. Auntie asks why he's out in the storm. He asks for whiskey. She says it's too expensive. I only have rum. (huh?) They down two rums and discuss Auntie’s financial arrangements for taking care of RM. Don’t they pay rent? Yes, I don’t have to pay rent, so out of my salary, that is profit (“ganancia”).

Auntie is still trying to get him to look at the girl. Imagine that the twin sister has taken her identity. This poor girl can’t go back. What does she look like? Andres asks. Beautiful. Why don’t you look or talk to her. She is very upset. You could entertain her. No, we are spared that revelation for another day.

More wet kissing between D and M.

Diego and Granny are lamenting. Rain has stopped. I hope Diana comes home soon. Diego says, don’t let Diana be with Max anymore. He is going to hurt her. I don’t like it either, says granny. I always taught her morals. But she is going with a married man. The truth is that when women are in love we become stupid. With three or four nice words we give in. Now Gav and Paco are at the door. Diego introduces them. She is the lawyer who will defend Diana.

At the little house. Andres won’t meet RM. He says he has to get back because he has to do something with a jewel (the emerald bracelet).

Back at Granny’s they are chatting about the girls and how Granny raised them. The doctor wants to destroy them and it is terrible. I cared for those girls like mother and father. Gav says that it must have been sad for Granny to lose her daughter. She knows because her daughters were stolen. Granny is shocked. Who could be capable of that? (Audience, doesn't granny know who their real mother is? I don't get this.)
Gav reveals the shocking name: Octavia Irazabal. You know her. The same person where these girls work. Since I learned that Diana was working there, I begged that they wouldn’t go. They must avoid being a victim of this trash. Gav begins to get worked up.

Gaby comes in and is crying. Asks Granny to forgive her for something stupid. I got married without telling anyone. I got married to Larry. y dios mio. Gaviota drops her cup and stares.

Diana has more fear. It’s not fear of the storm but fear of what will happen to us. More promises from Max to divorce his wife. But your mother hates me. Nothing will stop us, says Max, with one of his best constipated looks.

Back at the hospital, Dr. Evil is discussing the pulsera with Andres. Andres tells him the jewel is real. Doc Evil reminds him that they have to split the profits. Andres says it isn't fair, but Doc reminds him that Andres wouldn't have the secret without him. (Is the secret about Diana's trial or is it about her mother being a murderer? I'm still not sure about this either.)
Andres says that Camila is desperate to know the truth. (If he only knew the truth about Real Deborah!) Let her wait. Something about how if you tell her she will tell Max and the nurse will escape. The logic of this escapes me. We can’t let her get away without our eating this ripe fruit. Keep pressuring her.

Gaby is crying to Granny. I married Larry because he begged me. You shouldn’t have. He used you, and now his mother will reject you. Typical of an Irazabal, says Gav. At the mention of Octavia, Gav becomes irrationally incensed. Slowly I turn . . . I guess 20 years in the clink will do that to you.

Gaby tries to defend Larry although admitted he behaved badly by leaving her in the hotel on her wedding night. Granny says: Forget him. You have life ahead of you. You will find someone better. Forget him. Gav has other sage motherly advice: Forget, no! What they have done is a humiliation. You must begin to hate and get revenge on them. Pull yourself up and go! They have to suffer like they make you. Granny protests.

Gav gets madder. You must make him pay. All I ask is that you hate the Irazabals with all your fuerza. (strength/heart/soul.) Then she looks a bit sheepish and leaves. Paco tries to make up for the awkward moment. She is very passionate about the Irazabals, he points out. Paco leaves.
Gaby goes on bed with her stuffed animals. She should go hang out with Granny DS. Granny wants her to forget Larry, but she can’t. If only he would love me a little.

Yolanda is having another one of her filler talks with Larry. Forget Pilar. You are married to Gaby. Pilar is no good. No Auntie, I don’t love Gaby, and I never will. Yolanda doesn't know that Pilar called from Mexico.

Back to the yacht. The sun is now out. You are so beautiful. They have kissed and done who knows what. Max walks away. Diana says. Ay Dios Mio. I hope I don’t regret giving in.

Labels: acorralada

Lety and Caro talk about the campaign. Caro reports that she and Aldo spoke to Guillermo, but he’s been waiting for someone from Conceptos to call him. Lety says she charged Omar the Imbecile with that task. She doesn’t even looked surprised that he didn’t do it. Caro says that Aldo and Luigi are already making great progress on the concept and stuff related to the campaign. Suddenly Lety looks distracted.

PM sweetly asks Saimon what time he is going to take her home. Saimon argues that he should have her dance partner take her home. She denies that she knew him but he doesn’t believe her. PM whines. He says he will need to verify that she has ended her relationship with that guy. He says until then he will be cold like an “icehurg” Sarah corrects his English, saying it’s “iceburg.” Saimon mimes closing a door between him and PM, then locking many locks on it. PM mimes being stuck behind the door. Sara yells at Saimon because he has not delivered the phone message to Fern yet. Saimon apologizes and then quickly unlocks the imaginary door to get past PM on his wait out to find Fern. Sara giggles with PM about what a ridiculous boyfriend she has.

Luigi catches Tomas hiding behind a potted tree and demands to know what Tomas is doing. Tomas claims he was walking around exploring the building. He anxiously tears leaves from tree. Luigi calls Tomas a few names before walking away. Alicia wonders loudly why people would want to walk around when they’d do just as well to sit in their office with the door closed and the blinds shut. She walks away and Tomas, now alone with Aldo, gives Aldo a ‘Why I oughta…” look.

Fern continues his search for the bag o’ memories in the dumpster. The sanitation guys try to stop him. Fern says it’s his company. The garbage guys correct him, saying that it was his company. They argue back and forth. Fern threatens to have them disciplined for taking the garbage out, even if it is their job. They agree to leave him alone.

Saimon finds Fern and asks if Fern’s is financial situation so bad that he has to go through garbage.

Aldo asks Tomas why he looks so mad. Tomas crossly mutters under his breath. He says it’s Aldo’s fault that Tomas suffered an embarrassment in front of Alicia. Aldo then mutters to himself in an exaggerated, comical way. Tomas says “What? I can’t understand you!” Aldo responds that he can't understand Tomas either. Aldo asks what he did wrong. Tomas lists Aldo’s offenses: blue eye, blond hair, charisma, smile like Clark Gable, etc. Tomas tells Aldo he doesn’t like him because he’s handsome. Aldo starts in on his Deep Thoughts about looks and character, but when he tries to put his arm around Tomas, Tomas shoves him away and says attractive people are the root of all evil. Luigi comes back looking for Aldo and the two walk away.

PM whines about having to take bus because Saimon is still ticked off with her. Alicia hears this and makes fun of them. Same old back and forth as always: “you guys are so poor”… “ well, you’re poor too”… “Not me, I’m classy.”

Martha remember how badly they’ve seen Alicia treat Tomas. She tells the cuartel that thinks Tomas and Alicia had something to do with all the shenanigans around here.

Lola, who I guess did a great job analyzing The Letter, spells it out for her friends: Lety was with Tomas, then she became Fern’s lover. That resulted in the abrupt end to Fern and Marcia’s wedding plans. Now it looks like Tomas also had a fling with Marcia’s best friend. What a scandal What horror! What promiscuity! What an embarrassment!

Tomas comes in and calls Lola to his office. Before she leaves, she tells them what a nutcase Tomas is, he’s worse then the rest of the execs put together.

Fern denies that he is garbage picking. Saimon finally remembers the phone message from Sarah and tells Fern. He’s not interested. He explains that he’s looking for some important documents. Saimon offers to help and begins to look through the trash. He picks up a bag up and Fern tears it away and holds it to his chest like a 3-year old with his blanky. He sends Saimon away. After much pontification about leaving, Saimon finally leaves. Fern shakes his head then goes back to sifting through the trash.

Turns out Tomas called Lola into his office so she can dial a number and transfer the call to him. Lola dials the number. Tomas’s cell phone rings. It seems he had her dial his own cell. He says he just wants to test the phone and walks around asking “Can you hear me now?” Lola asks if there is anything else he needs. Tomas says “Yes, that blonde… what’s her name? Oh yes, Alicia… I asked her to come to my office and she hasn’t so send her in.” Lola, armed with her new-found theory about Tomas and the Oxi, looks annoyed.

Lola sends Oxi to Tomas’s office. Alicia can’t imagine what Tomas wants. In his office, Tomas gargles with cologne just like the good old days. Alicia comes in and Tomas reminds her of the conversation where she slapped him and blamed him for her losing her car (days ago for us but only hours ago for them). He says he wants to make it up to her. She suddenly warms up and begins to flirt “Aaaaay Tommy!” She asks if he is going to give her a raise. No. Is he going to give her the loan she needs? No. He picks up a bag and pulls out a pair of pantyhose. She thanks him nicely then starts yelling at him and slapping him with the pantyhose before storming out. Tomas looks hurt. He holds the pantyhose to his chest and exclaims, “She still loves me!”

Fern is losing patience and says things are always in the last place you look (that’s because once you find it, you stop looking… pa-dum-pah!). He finds some gross garbage before finding what may be the right bag. He feels the bottom of the bad and thinks that it’s either a stuffed animal or a used diaper. He reaches in and pulls out a cute leopard print giraffe. He lets out a big sigh, kisses the toy and says “Finally, my Lety, we’re together again.” He holds the toy giraffe like a baby.

Lety thought-bubbles that she can’t believe Fern threw the bag o’memories away. Suddenly, Fern walks through her office door with one of the cards in his teeth. He spins Caro around in her chair to move her out of his way. There is passion in his eyes! He calls “Lety”… Lety replies “Don Fernando”… “Lety”… “Don Fernando”… “Lety”… “Ya (enough), Don Fernando”…Fern says he wants to read the card to her. This card is all true and continues to describe what’s in his heart. He climbs on top of her desk and reads, “I need to be with you. I can't tolerate your absence, the absence of your kisses, of your body.”

At this, Lety jumps on the desk and they hold each other tightly. Fern says he’s not done and continues to read, “Life has given me a hard challenge: just days before my uniting with a woman who was supposed to be my life - the true woman appears. This made me change and now I want to be with you all the time. I know this is a tough challenge… but you appeared in time, before I could fall into disaster again.” He throws the card over his shoulder. (Caro is still spinning in her chair under the X-rated ‘Shell from Hell’ painting.) Fern continues as if still reading “Love, Fern Mendiola.” He points to himself “That’s me”. He grabs Lety and they melt into a wonderfully passionate and eager kiss. He stops to tell her again “me”. They kiss again, almost falling off the desk.

Caro has picked up the card and peeks at Fern and Lety kissing from behind it. Fern literally comes up for air, then tells Lety he loved her when he wrote the card and he loves her still. Lety says she never stopped loving him either. As she speaks, Fern holds both ends of her mouth in his hand, making he pucker like a fish. Fern asks for forgiveness and she forgives him. Another kiss. Then Lety snaps out of it and Caro is asking Lety what is going on. Lety is sitting on her desk with a half-pucker.

Outside, Fern re-reads the same card Lety was just daydreaming about. He is near tears.

Caro asks Lety again what’s going on. Lety admits she was daydreaming about Fern. She can’t tear him out of her heart. Caro understands, but thinks Lety needs to give it time.

Alicia is furious about Tomas’s gift. The other women call each other on their desk phones to talk about how mad Alicia is. Meanwhile Alicia mutters that she wants to strangle Tomas and yank his eyes out. The women sarcastically offer to help. Alicia calls them names. She won't share her problem, she has the type of problems unknown to poor and vulgar people like them. Just then, Ariel walks into the office and listens to her little speech.

Aldo comes to visit Lety. This brightens Lety up. He wants to take her out to dinner. Lety says first she needs to call together a meeting for a status on the project. Aldo frets that Luigi is talented but not easy to deal with, plus he wants Aldo next to him all the time. Lety asks“Gee I wonder why?” and they both laugh. Aldo gets up and leans in across Lety’s desk to remind her about dinner. Lety backs away from him uneasily.

An outdoor shot of Conceptos shows us that it is now dark… finally, thank goodness!

Ariel asks why PM is now at the prestigious presidential desk and why Alicia is in a lowly regular desk. He says next she’ll be in the cafeteria, where at least she’s have a uniform and won’t have to worry about torn stockings. Aldo, walking out of Lety’s office, sees this and walks away in disgust. Alicia pretends she hadn’t noticed the torn stockings. He offers her money for new pantyhouse but she is insulted and turns his money down.

Luigi shares his choice of music for the campaign with Marcia, Ricky and Aldo. Aldo wants something more animated, something that “invites one to dance.”

Stalker Tomas is in his office admiring the many photo copies of varying sizes of Alicia’s picture which he probably spent all afternoon making. Alicia walks in but luckily he is able to hide the pictures before she sees them. She demands the pantyhose. He offers them to her timidly and she grabs them and walks out.

Ariel walks into Luigi’s office. Luigi introduces Ariel to Aldo. Ariel promptly asks Aldo what his function at Conceptos is. Aldo gives him a very complete description of the campaign and his role in it. Ariel seems miffed that they have this great gig that might actually bring them out of this mess. He asks if this is the great idea that Lety came up with to bring them out of the ruin that she prevoked. Aldo asks if Ariel really thinks that this mess is all just Lety’s doing. Ariel tells Aldo to mind his own business. Aldo fights back by smiling so brightly that Ariel’s eyes start to bleed and he falls to his knees begging for mercy! … Well, the bleeding and begging didn’t really happen… but maybe in tomorrow’s episode…

Labels: fea