Tuesday, March 26, 2019
Ay, Caray! Did I Say That?
“He should move to
Hartford because I'm in dire need of a smiling lawyer/ architect/ snake bite
healer/ bricklayer/ cowboy in tight jeans & an unbuttoned shirt.” – Maggarita (Soy Tu Dueña)
“Somebody should tell her that the best way to Doc Mask's heart is ‘through his chest, with a sharp knife.’" – Andy (STM)
“Since telenovela virgins are fertile as the Nile, I think we all know what's coming next.” – JudyB (STM)
“Who decorates that swing Marina was sitting in? Disney bluebirds and butterflies???” – Doris (STM)
“I hope that by double dipping and getting 2 salaries she can finally afford a nice blouse to go over that bustier.” – Rosemary la Otra (PASL2)
“Ya know how those slaps happen in the tns, I want to see Pru or Dami, or Angsty slap Su so hard her descendants feel it." –Nina (STM)
“If the corruption in the police precinct is ever investigated how many of its force will be able to identify her birthmarks?” – UA (PASL2)
“Sophia go directly to Javier’s arms, by pass Mr. ‘me siento mal, muy mal’.” – Anonymous (PASL2)
In a bra. But it's candy, always candy (Nina on Hijas de la Luna)
“Strap on your beanies and here we go.” Anita (Me Declaro Culpable)
“This is gonna be a fun whacked out patio, I can hardly wait.” Nina (Me Declaro Culpable)
"He is dressed in a black wet suit (why? it's the middle of the day! How did he drive the boat and change into this wet suit at the same time?) and face mask. Oh, gah! Just drink the grape Kool-Aid and call it a day." Doris ("Hijas de la Luna")
“Rubi defying La Virgen De Guadalupe won't lead to anything good.” Andy the Lurker One (Rubi)
“Eventually Gonzalo throws her in the pool to cool off. Good choice, we were tired of all the screaming as well.” Ria (Usurpadora)
"Wow, this TN is really getting wild. There is no use wearing a beanie because it'll just pop off." Rgv Chick (Culpable)
They did it? Geez, that was boring. It may have been flying for them, but there was no lift off for us." Rosemary la Otra (Culpable)
"It was nice to see Tizzy. I still cannot fathom why he is smitten with ruffled Rob. I like the robe that he was almost wearing." -- Susanlynn (Culpable)
“If you've ever seen any telenovelas, you know nibbling on strawberries is just one step away from Unbridled Passion." -- JudyB (Hijas de la Luna)
“My beanie hat is too tight, as it should be." -- Doris (Culpable)
“Ingrid's caring ministrations to Julian were so smothering even I was having trouble breathing. Maybe Javier pulled his own plug just to be rid of her." -- Doris (Culpable)
If all the wit on this thread were added up, it could possibly supply electricity for a medium sized city. -- Novelera (Culpable)
Nothing new, wash, rinse, repeat (and for heaven’s sakes, hang out to dry.) -- Anita (Culpable)
I guess he's as confused about his sexuality as I am (about his sexuality). I just want him to be happy and respond well to the therapy he's going to need after Ingrid's influence. -- Rosemary la Otra (Culpable)
He tells her she's the best woman he has known and that she is his soul an omg he's only know her for like a week and their scenes are so sweet that they hurt my teeth. -- Princess JuJu (Culpable)
Give Keila her old job. She already has the 'Spanish Weather Girl' look. Woof. -- Kirby (Amar a Muerte)
I am very much looking forward to seeing it in the rearview mirror. (AndyB, Y Manana Sera Otro Dia)
It’s bullets or besos, you choose, mi amor. (Anita, Me Declaro Culpable)
Put on your monkey masks and Genovese capes and sneak into that writers' room RIGHT NOW. It's not too late! (Blue Lass, Me Declaro Culpable)
Serpent Diego speaks to Brenda with a forked tongue, injecting his lethal venom into her already addled brain. (Diana, Ringo)
All the baddies were just. so. bad. today that I had to watch two (2!) Hallmark movies just to find some balance. (Doria, Me Declaro Culpable)
She's lost a lot of blood! We're losing her! The defibrillator! On tenterhooks? Nah, I didn't think so. We don't even get a coma out of this one. (JudyB, Me Declaro Culpable)
If you are going to dangle some gold trinket as bait, don't try to pass off brass instead. (Kirby, Rubi)
Not. Fine. The woman is a freak in a box. And daddy knows it. (Nina, Me Declaro Culpable)
Lesson for Katia: if a guy keeps telling you he loves someone else have some self-respect and create a Tinder profile. (Princess JuJu, Me Declaro Culpable)
"Honestly, I like the way this woman operates. Full frontal hostility. Works for me. And she can have all my lunch money if she wants it." -- JudyB (Me Declaro Culpable)
“I'm shocked Tat's turning tricks. I guess Juan is her retirement plan." -- Niecie in MD (PASL2)
“That ovary should say, 'No I'm not going to meet that sperm and this woman is stark raving mad, she aint gonna be my momma.'" -- Nina (Imperio de Mentiras)
“I HATE the mid-point of a novela when absolutely everything is going wrong and we are writhing in angst and worry, all the while muttering 'it's just a story, just a story!'" -- JudyB (Medicos)
"Victor remains a rigid rectum determined to sue the drawers off of the Instituto." -- Lila (Medicos)
“Nieves is like one of those rubber boxing dolls. She takes the punch and comes right back up to deliver another batch of bitchy bad mouth." -- Jardinera (Imperio de Mentiras)
“I think when we find out who is Who, when did he/she do, what is what, why is why, and what the hell.....we'll be to tired to Give-a-dam." -- Nina (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Are we supposed to be entertained by a whole orbit full of people who are one step away from needing to be watered every other day?" -- Kirby (Imperio de Mentiras)
"He turned around and they were on each other like participants at a vampire orgy." -- Urban Anthropologist (Por Amar Sin Ley 2)
“She’s divided in half by a 5” patent leather belt. Her short, tight, black skirt has seemingly been enhanced in the rear. It actually is quite a striking ensemble, just not on her." -- Anita (Me Declaro Culpable)
“Maybe give Renata a month or two before she starts dating. We can't all immediately fall in love with the first guy who kidnaps us, Majo." -- Kelly (Imperio de Mentiras)
“What are you missing? Your tin foil hat and/or your believe-a-beanie." -- Jardinera (Imperio de Mentiras)
"Didn't Renata look darling in that dress and earrings and lucidity?" -- Rosemary la Otra, Imperio de Mentiras
“Franco's doctor has warned that if he learns the truth he could have a brain aneurysm, ummmm, is that how that works? I don't think that's how it works." -- Princess JuJu, Me Declaro Culpable
“Alas, Roberto's chickens, in the form of curvaceous air hostesses, keep coming back to roost." -- JudyB, Por Amar Sin Ley 2
"Tatiana is going to take Juan AND his ma for a ride and she'll do the driving." -- Anita, Por Amar Sin Ley 2
“Stop it with the hand sex. Berti gonna kill you and tell God you died." -- Nina, Me Declaro Culpable
“Remi tells the Padre that Little Juan sets off his gaydar, but I think he read it on Caray." -- Blue Lass, Quererlo Todo
“Where do we go from here? Who lives? Who dies? Who goes to jail without passing Go or collecting 200 pesos? Who gets a rose and makes a love match? When did the writers make these decisions? How many babies will we have at the finale, and who gets them? The End." -- Susanlynn
“Aaaand we have a new category for our telenovela Bingo cards: Hiding under a tarp in fiance's jeep while wearing only a bath towel." -- Doris
“How do I love thee? Let me count...your money." -- Kirby
“Where is the gypsy who says 'Las cartas no mienten'?" -- Urban Anthropologist
Fer has found a spare bedroom for Sonia, since the broom closet is filled with all her numerous lies, half-truths and hair iron." -- Adriana Noel (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Our laser-focused Roberta overhears the phone call, heaves him over the railing and splatters her blackmailer all over the pavement. Love me a woman who takes care of business without delay! Bet she turned in all her term papers on time as well." -- JudyB (Me Declaro Culpable)
“Looks like the sub-theme of this is how many times Mateo will surprise Valeria in the shower." -- La Paloma (Quererlo Todo)
"So, Carlos hates Alan enough to have the office renamed, hopes now he dies because of what he knows, and looks awful in that brown suit." -- Anita (Por Amar Sin Ley 2)
“What’s wrong with me, she says as she scratches away. [I can easily exceed the blog limit on this answer]" -- dondi356 (La Suerte de Loli)
“I'm rooting for Sonia to live, even if she's not the sharpest knife in a TN full of butter knives. Maybe she could go live in Renata's apartment since no one else seems to be using it. She could get together with Mau since no one is using him right now either." -- Kelly (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Just now I heard Fabian singing "Jelly roll, gumdrop, milkshake...Be my baby!" and it made more sense to me than this show." -- Susanlynn (Imperio de Mentiras)
“I have a 0% track record with my predictions, so why stop now." -- Diana (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Anyone who's seen a telenovela with a real fake priest knows that you cannot be absolved if you're just going to run out and do it again as soon as there's another jailbreak." -- Blue Lass
“I am feeling exhausted from suspending my disbelief." -- Susanlynn"Leo is really looking to mark his territory, isn't he? He is seriously ignorant about how to deal with amnesia, so he must not watch telenovelas." -- Urban Anthropologist (Quererlo Todo)
“We see her from the rear (and now we know where daughter got her fashion sense.)" -- Anita (Me Declaro Culpable)
“How can you tell when Bruno is lying? His lips are moving." -- Novelera (La Suerte de Loli)
“I think the servants just nod and say 'si' at this point. That's what I do." -- Susanlynn
“I want Alexa to change the writing of this show." -- dondi356
"Leo is the worst cop in history. It hasn't occurred to him before that Sonia might be staying...in her house?" -- Adriana Noel (Imperio de Mentiras)
“I feel for Magda's working conditions. She has to wear the same white bustier with droopy shoulder ruffles every day. Does she have multiples of this item, or does she wash it out by hand at the end of every day?" -- La Paloma (Quererlo Todo)
“Fortunately for him, his phone rings. And unfortunately for her, he answers it." -- JudyB (Me Declaro Culpable)
“Was it an intentional decision to hire writers who so obviously
detest babies? Is there any pregnancy that will come to fruition?" -- Diana
“I have completely given up on trying to follow the inheritance/parentage ramifications and am just waiting to see who ends up in the carcel/morgue/manicomio/nunnery." -- Blue Lass (Quererlo Todo)
"Pretty sure they were sheltering behind the glass front door, which somehow did nothing to stop the bullets. Who knew?" -- Kelly (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Dona Eva...I want her to team up with Toro's son. They could rob countless people and that way she could also get some exercise." -- Anonymous (Si Nos Dejan)
“Julián slithers in while the Mexican Greek chorus begins their ominous chanting, so we know this will not end well." -- Doris (Me Declaro Culpable)
“Lots of familiar actors and actresses, a stone cold killer as the
villain, beautiful horses, and lovely countryside views. Saddle up. Here
we go." -- Susanlynn (La Desalmada)
“And he dies. More crying ensues. OK, can we start revenging now?" -- Adriana Noel
(La Desalmada)
"Katia is still in her white Flamenco wedding dress, sans castanets." -- Doris (Me Declaro Culpable)
“The local press has to see through Art at this point; he had to have lost credibility with that black shirt and white tie." -- Urban Anthropologist (Quererlo Todo)
“That was a cute jacket, but she'd missed a button and it was uneven, like her mom had suddenly arrived home during a 2nd base make-out session." -- Rosemary la Otra (Imperio de Mentiras)
“They really are perfect for each other but that relationship will never go anywhere but horizontal." -- Doris (Me Declaro Culpable)
“She has joined a pretty exclusive clu...wait, who on this show
has NOT killed somebody yet? Club prolly not that exclusive after
all...nevermind." -- Kirby
(Imperio de Mentiras)
"Yeah she did seduce him but that does happen after 8 bottles of wine." -- Anonymous (Si Nos Dejan)
“And Yaren, with her pseudo-quasi mini upright not fainting moment! If she weren’t so fake she’d be an all out boob job, butt injected, plastic surgery experiment!" -- Carmella (Hercai)
“Leslie's hair at least looked good in that high bun. And it gives her the extra height she needs to be on this ride." -- Kelly (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Completely inappropriate clothes for burying a sack of money, but, hey, it's a telenovela." -- Doris
“Well it all seems like fun until someone gets an eye put out or shot in the back with their own gun." -- Anonymous
"Rulli in another bizarre wig. I couldn’t pay attention to what they were saying. It looked like an animal on his head. Dead or alive?" -- Jarifa (Vencer el Pasado)
“The speed of speech in these comedies and contemporary telenovelas, plus all the slang, is mind-boggling...at one point...even the closed caption writer gave up, and just left a long blank for a while." -- JudyB (Soltero Con Hijas)
“The way Miran bounces in the saddle, I fear for the avocados and future children." -- Novelera (Hercai)
“What kind of a moron shows up to commit a crime while wearing a massive necklace that could give away his identity?" -- Princess JuJu (La Desalmada)
“You have these TN chicks with two walk-in closets full of underwear alone, and they move across country in one little pull-along. I'd like to see how they fold all that stuff." -- Kirby (Imperio de Mentiras)
"Right after this charade parade, Vicki creeps out of her hallway hidy hole and glares, shooting death rays at Christina's bodacious backside." -- Jardinera (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Efrain scrunches his face most unbecomingly and gets on his high horse. Unfortunately, he does not ride away." -- Diana (Soltero Con Hijas)
“Oh noes! Val's diary has disappeared! And she hid it so cleverly under the bed, where no one would think to look!" -- Blue Lass (Quererlo Todo)
"Melike risks a detached retina from her rolling eyes." -- Novelera (Hercai)
“Sandy talked to Leonel about becoming a model but he told her -- as politely as one could -- that she didn't have what it takes. This is going to make her even bitchier." -- Urban Anthropologist (Quererlo Todo)
“Will Mabe be moved by his ugly crying and try again? Nothing’s stopped Karina, even when he and Alicia were in love. Yesterday." -- Diana (Si Nos Dejan)
“BTW, these girls might be advised, that if you are a grownup and your Mom slaps you into three episodes from now, you are definitely allowed, nay, even expected, to slap back with all your youth and vigor." -- Kirby (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Okay, here we go with lots of lying, crying, and dying..." -- Susanlynn (La Desalmada)
“Ok just wondering. But a
lawyer in the USA can't bang a client. Also can not aid a client going on the
lam. Also not banging said client while they are on the lam.” – Anonymous
(Si Nos Dejan)
“Acapulco has a State
Department advisory for a reason, and it's not because the occasional bailed-out
mercy killer drops by for a tango.” – Blue Lass (Me Declaro Culpable)
"’Don’ Leo, huh? I
don't think the black hat is working any magic with him.” -- La Paloma (Quererlo Todo)
“How long did Tere have on that leopard cleavage murder
scene prison shirt? I'm glad she finally got to take a shower.” –
Rosemary la Otra (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Sergio told Yaya that he misses Alicia...ha...what he is
actually saying is ‘I want my mommy who used to take care of me.’ Boo hoo. This
hombre is unbelievable.” -- Susanlynn (Si Nos Dejan)
An "I told you so" twerk smirk is plastered on her face from ear to ear. -- Jardinera (Imperio de Mentiras)
To the casual observer she has broken every law enforcement rule, except 'don't be late to work'. -- Kirby (Imperio de Mentiras)
Miran is as cold as an Ohio winter, and as stupid as someone who closes their eyes and claims that they can’t see! -- Carmella (Hercai)
Too bad she also got a glimpse of Ursula greeting her man with a full frontal assault (i.e. marking my territory in an unmistakable way) kiss!!! -- Darcy (Mi Camino es Amarte)
I love the way Leslie just stands up to her giant dad, she just gets face to face with his stomach and rips him a new one. -- Nina (Imperio de Mentiras)
Why Tiziano, why? You're overrun with nubile, willing babes. Why continue to pursue a menopausal lunatic? -- Judy B (Me Declaro Culpable)
Cami dances with Juanito, Dalia dances with her lawyer, Minerva and Aaron stay at the table to square-dance with their alternating shot glasses and bottles of beer. -- Blue Lass (Quererlo Todo)
Falso and Karen meet. The forked tongues collide. -- RGVChick (Mi Camino es Amarte)
…for a minute, I thought Univision went all Edward Scissorhands with the editing, but it made sense later. -- O.S. (Corazon Guerrero)
For sale by owner: 4XL Beanie stretched to the max (original size: Medium) -- Darcy B (Corazon Guerrero)
My beanie popped right off, and I think I pulled a muscle suspending my disbelief. -- SusanLynn (El Amor Invencible)
OMG OMG OMG that dress...she looks like a Dollar Store threw up on her. -- Blue Lass (Quererlo Todo)
"Vicious Vicki needs to report for anvil sizing.
However, I cannot wait to see a showdown throwdown between her and Crissy Cruel
Shoes first." -- Jardinera (Imperio de Mentiras)
“So she'll hate her sister for the rest of her life? Their
relationship wasn't all that good to begin with." -- La Paloma (Quererlo
Todo)
She and her split skirt begin closing in for the kill."
-- Urban Anthropologist (Por Amar Sin Ley II)
"Yes, just so dainty and helpless, and innocent as a newborn fawn. Surprised we do not see the little white spots on her back." -- Kirby (Imperio de Mentiras)
“Sofia, for reasons only known to Smirnoff, decides to pay homage to KISS and Tammy Faye Baker to welcome Melody for a visit." -- O.S. (La Mexicana y El Guero)
“Handan is looking on from the balcony with a scarf tied around her forehead like a refugee from Woodstock." -- Novelera (Hercai)
"She said she managed to become 'her best version." If she was a computer and this was a software update, I'd have asked for a refund because it surely would have crashed." -- Waterlily (Minas de Pasion)
"Just because you wear a turtleneck and a beautiful blazer does not a James Bond make." -- Diana (Minas de Pasion)
"Said guy's body is randomly lying in some part of the town, next to the dumpsters. At least they put the garbage with the garbage." -- Weirdo (Minas de Pasion)
Labels: announcements
How do we make suggestions for new postings on the sideboard? We've had so many classics since the sidebar was frozen in time.
This is so incredible. So many happy and cherished memories. I love that Carlos and Madelaine live on in their recaps and that the witty quotes we've treasured over the years "live on".
Thank you for making us all feel valued and appreciated.
It seems you've always been "here". We are so fortunate to have you.
You are THE best.
Diana
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