Caray, Caray!

Remains of the day

As Lety continues to write in her diary, Fern arrives home. His phone rings again - it's Omar. Omar's still in bed, but he wants to know of Fern made horror to Lety last night. Fern chides him for making the same old jokes. He tells Omar he's not an idiot; he should be able to come up with some new ones. He describes how they played in the kitchen last night and tried to make fondue.

Just then, Omar's newest amiga comes out of the bathroom wearing a towel. Omar tries to wrap up the conversation - did Lety show any signs of having found the Red Bag? Fern says no, she was in a playful and affectionate mood. Omar hangs up on him, bored with Fern's inane happy talk, and turns his attention to his guest.

Lety tells her diary that in the middle of all the evening's happiness, she was reminded of Marcia. She feels badly that Marcia is still harboring illusions of marrying Fernando. (At home, Fernando gazes sadly at Marcia's portrait on the mantle.) Lety says she and Fernado have the same sense of humor. She feels full and complete. Even though they didn't get to make love, it was still magical. Fern is her reason to live.

According to my notes, this day has been ten episodes long. Amazing. (Try not to think about it.) And it has been at least seven story-days since Lety's birthday. (Try not to think about that either). We'll just assume there was an uneventful weekend in there someplace, okay?

Next day, in the Padillamobile

The Padillas are en route to the country club. Tomas's mom's stove is tied to the roof along with lots of pots and pans and containers. Mom didn't sleep well and is a nervous wreck. Lety says some soothing things but is mostly staring into space with her chin in her hands; her thoughts are clearly elsewhere. RoboPop, who is extra-wheezy this morning, accidentally drives over a curb and some things fall off the roof. (Fortunately, not the food.) As they gather the things up off the street, Pop says the best part is that he'll get to spend the entire day with Mom and Lety. Plus, he'll see what Lety's job is like. (Lety flashes back to her birthday party, when her father was grilling her coworkers about their marital status.)

Also, he's looking forward to seeing Fern again - he remembers Fern wanting to continue their conversation. (Lety flashes back to that too, Pop babbling about his Tio Lazaro while Fern gasps for air with his mouth on fire.) Lety asks her dad for just one favor. Please keep away from Fern. Fern will be all nervous, etc. Dad is peeved. Lety quietly tells her mother that he's imprudent. Mother agrees, but says he has a big heart.

They get to the country club and the rent-a-cop gives them a lot of attitude. He won't even check his guest list. He sarcastically asks if Lety is the model. Offended, RoboPop offers to remodel the guard's nose.

Finally Pop mentions Fern's name. Suddenly, the guard is very nice. Lety shows him her Conceptos badge. He tells her how nice her photo is on the badge. He checks his guest list and finds them and lets them through. Ironically, they apologize to him.

Under the big-top

Most of the cuartel has already arrived at the country club and are making preparations under a big tent. Lola is nervous that everything will go wrong. Juana is just happy Alicia's not around. Martha says something about her teeth hurting when she eats? And speaking of food, she wonders where Lety is. Sara wonders where PM is. They remember she went out with Saimon last night, and Lola said she was out all night - she never came home to sleep. This titillates them.

Sara droolingly says something about Luigi being surrounded by tall German men. Irma sez he was actually up all night picking out samples for today's commercial. She has those samples in a bag, and they all want to see. Looks like a red bra-and-panty set. Martha likes it and asks if she can keep it after the shoot is done? Lola gently reminds her, "after you slim down some." (I'm pretty sure Martha is only wearing a fat suit. The actress, I mean.)

Meanwhile, the Padillas are driving through the winding country club roads. Pop philosophizes about all this nice open space while the poor people are all crowded together in the city. Mom is still nervous.

Lola is relieved to see them approaching. They help unpack the car and discuss Fern's lateness. Dad voices his disapproval, but Lety discourages him from speaking. Lety reminds Irma that she doesn't want Fern to know that Mom is cooking. She is very worked up about this. Irma and Lety go for a walk to talk about it. (This is some of that "manufactured tension" that Chris was complaining about the other day in his Heridas recap.)

Mom and the rest of the cuartel set up the food stuff. Martha goes on and on about how Super Lety saved the day, because Martha would have been in big trouble with Fern if Lety's hadn't gotten her mom to do the catering. Mom agrees with her that Lety is awesome.

At Conceptos

I assume Lopez is in his office, but other than that, Alicia is alone in the executive lobby of Conceptos, on the phone with Marcia. She whines that she's working so hard answering the phones, and she'd rather have Pilar's job and the 500,000 pesos. Marcia tells her she must be joking to think that job could ever be hers. Al tries to get Marcia to lean on Fernando to make it happen. Marcia explains why it is not possible. Alicia is pretty, tall, with a nice figure, etc., but she has no name recognition or experience. She tells Alicia to stay out of the way and not interfere with the shoot. Alicia also admits that she lied - she never took riding lessons. (Marcia doesn't know what Alicia's talking about.) Alicia says the phones are ringing (they're not) and she has to go.

Having heard and understood every word of what Marcia said except for little details like "no" and "not" and "don't," Alicia grabs her purse and heads out to the country club.

On the sidewalk

Tomas talks to Alicia's photo. For some reason, he is convinced that Lety lied to him about Alicia not being needed at the country club, so he's going to go there and meet her. He'll do it sneaky so Lety won't know he's there - no sense in pissing her off. He snorts and drools at Alicia's picture, kissing it and talking to it.

Doña Ebe, a neighbor, approaches and says, "Tomas?" All Tomas can see is Alicia, because he is holding the picture so close. He answers, "Alicia!?" The neighbor yells at him and says he's depraved.

Doña Ebe leaves (what a pointless scene). Tomas realizes he doesn't have a bus ticket, so he bums one off of another passerby, who just happens to be Doña Ebe's son.

On the phone

Fern and Omar are on the phone again. Omar is standing outside a glass-walled conference room at FIFA HQ. Marcia is watching him from inside the conference room and can kinda-hear what Omar is saying. This is bad because Omar is the King of Rehash.

Omar is talking about the hotness of Pilar. Fern tells Omar how crazy she is. Omar says, "why can't I be mistaken for Pavel?" Fern says Pilar came to his house last night, interrupting his and Lety's date.

(Fern gets to the country club guard shack. The guard isn't there. Fern honks impatiently. The guard shows up and apologizes - he was in the bathroom. He tells Fern about the food people who showed up in the cruddy car with the stove on top. Fern assumes the cuartel are catering this event themselves. He's displeased and filled with dread. He decides he's going to check it out.)

Omar, the dingaling, repeats "so Pilar was at your house last night," snorting and drooling as always. Marcia hears this and assumes the worst. She comes out of the conference room and yells at Omar and takes his phone and yells at Fernando. "You said you were alone last night," etc. Fern says he was surprised by her visit, but he is flustered and only semi-coherent because Lety and Irma are calling to him as he approaches the tent. He tries to explain about Pavel and says nothing happened. She doesn't believe him. He sarcastically apologizes. He says he has work to do, adios, and hangs up on her. (All these people could use a refresher course in telephone etiquette.)

Marcia is still yelling. A German staff member asks her to keep her voice down.

All together now

Fern arrives at the tent. The first thing he notices is Lety's mom. The feas welcome him, and Mom happily announces that this was all Lety's idea! Fernando asks why they didn't use a professional (something about this reminds me of a boardroom scene from The Apprentice) and Mom gently deflects, saying it's no trouble. Then she brags about her mole poblano recipe. She doesn't seem to notice everyone's nervousness, and doesn't seem to recall what happened the last time he tried her mole poblano.

Fern says, "Erasmo's not here, right?" RoboPop pops up, points to his watch, and chastizes Fern for being late. Fern tries to change the subject, asking about the nice watch.

RoboPop complains that Fern is corrupting and seducing Lety with his money, his pretty lips, his face, his nice clothes... he says he's cheating on Marcia too. Pop shakes Fern. Fern confesses that what he feels for Lety is...

And then he snaps out of his dream. Damn! Lety and Irma come back from their walk. Pop hasn't forgotten that Fern hasn't answered his question yet. What kind of boss doesn't get to work before his employees?

Fern protests that he was only a little late, and that he and Lety need to talk. They head towards the stables.

Fern asks Lety why she didn't tell him about her parents doing the food. She says she didn't want to worry him when he has so much on his mind. He asks why he would worry about such a minor thing. (Ha!) He admits he's uncomfortable around her father. Lety admits he can be "impertinent."

Lety and Fern arrive at the paddock. The horse guy tells them the horse the wanted is sick today. All the other horses are in use except for one, but that one's very jumpy. It will have to do.

Back at the big-top, there is another moment of manufactured tension. The stove won't light. Lola flips out. Then the stove does light. Woop-de-doo. Two men in sunglasses approach. The shorter one introduces the taller one as Rudolfo. Sara boggles. Rudolfo is going to provide the security for their event. Irma says "well, Sara, you're coordinating this part, right?" Sara can't speak well with her mouth hanging open like that, but she does walk away with Rudolfo. Martha says it's love at first sight.

Lety goes for a walk with her father. She really wants him to leave Fern alone. He says he'll just wander around on the golf course. Lety thinks that's a bad idea, but he's annoyed with her and that's what he feels like doing.

Some drunken middle-aged men are loafing nearby around a golf cart. RoboPop strikes up a conversation with them. Mostly he wants to know why they aren't at work.

---

How's that mole poblano?
What foolishness will befall Alicia and/or Tomas?
Will Marcia believe Fern's explanation about Pilar?
Where is Pilar, anyway?
And where are Paula Maria and Saimon?
Find out tomorrow!
And don't forget to check out Ugly Betty tonight on ABC!

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