Caray, Caray!

We start our episode today with Gaby nervously talking a mile a minute to Max, not letting her sister Diana get a word in edgewise. You see, Gaby is volunteering Diana to nurse Max's wife, Marfil, back to health. Diana is not particularly thrilled, as she is in love with Max and would rather eat glass than provide therapy to "Marfil" (who is actually the evil twin Debora). The real Marfil is still in a coma after being shot by her crazy ex Gerardo. To help keep them straight, I will refer to Deborah impersonating Marfil as "M/D." Max (who also loves Diana) ***Take a number, Max. I think every guy on this show is after her*** is asking Diana if she is or is not going to return to work caring for Dona Santa (Max's grandma) plus M/D. Diana finally says yes and thought bubbles "What has Gaby gotten me into?"

It is now the next morning and Gaby and Diana are on their way to report to work at the Irazabal mansion. Gaby asks if Diana is going to continue not speaking to her. Diana says she's mad because she didn't want to return to Psycho Mansion, but "you decided for me."

Out struts Octavia from a limo in some black get-up that is slit down to her navel. As she walks through the gate to her office, Fedora/Gaviota (who I will refer to as F/G) steps in front of her and blocks the way. F/G sarcastically state "How good to see you again, Octavia Irazabal." Octavia is impactada.

Bruna and Max are in the bedroom with the "invalid" M/D. M/D has apparently just woken up after a 2-year coma. Max asks M/D how she slept the night before. M/D whines on and on about show confused she is and when can they sleep together. Blah, blah, blah. ***Bruna is supposedly a servent, but I've yet to see her serve. All she does is lurk about and plot with M/D about how M/D can get Max to fall in love with her again, making her and Debora rich. Apparently she has some deep secret that Marfil and Debora know nothing about. My guess is she may be their real mother, but I digress*** Lala, the housekeeper interrupts the cozy scene to announce Diana's arrival. M/D asks Max how he found a nurse so quickly. Max states the doctor recommended physical therapy for her - the sooner the better - and what better person to help her along but the lovely, naive Diana. M/D wants to begin walking asap so she can get her hooks back into Max. M/D is laying it on pretty thick and heavy to dopey Max - how much she wants to get well and be with Max, how he must be tired of having an invalid wife, how she wants to make up for all the time they've lost, and how it would kill her if Max fell for another woman. In walks Diana. . .Max looks all dreamy, Bruna simply says "Tu?" and M/D looks disgusted.

Larry (Octavia's son) is in a bathing suit getting out of the pool. It's easy to understand how he won the "Mr. Playa del Sol" competition. Up walks Gaby all smiles, braids and thick glasses. Gaby is in love with Larry. Gaby asks if she can get Larry breakfast. "No" he says, but you can rub suntan lotion on my back. Gaby's jaw drops to the ground and she gets all jittery.

Back to the showdown between F/G and Octave. O-"what are you doing here?" F/G-"you don't own the street. You and your family are going down after what you did to me." F/G asks O if she's nervous or afraid. O replies "you know I'm not afraid of you. We have no unfinished business. "Au contraire" states F/G. They continue throwing insults back and forth and call each other "trash." ***Them's fightin' words!" O threatens to send F/G back to jail. F/G states "I was set up, and by the way, where are my kids." O says they are dead. F/G-"I don't believe you. That's a lie." O walks off and F/G keeps repeating "liar, liar, liar!" F/G then thought bubbles "It HAS to be a lie!"

The confrontation between Bruna and Diana continues in M/D's bedroom. Bruna asks "what are you doing here? You were thrown out of the house." "Uh, no" says Max. Bruna asks "of all the nurses in the city, why her?" Because I love her, replies Max......Just kidding. Max does go on and on about what a wonderful nurse Diana is, however. Bruna starts to argue with him, but Max snaps back, "who the heck do you think YOU are to tell me what to do!" This is apparently a lesson that Bruna never seems to learn. M/D asks Bruna, "who's the girl?" Max jumps in to explain Diana is caring for Grandma (AKA Dona Santa). "Do you remember Grandma? If she's good enough for Grandma, she's good enough for you. Have you got a problem with that?" ***I'm not even going to comment on this exchange. That could be whole other blog.***M/D says "of course not, my love. Diana and I are going to be best friends!"

Larry is still in his swimsuit. He asks Gaby why she is just standing there and not saying anything. He again asks me (I mean her) to rub lotion on his back. Gaby, being flustered as always, ends up squirting half the bottle in her hands. As she's rubbing the lotion on, Larry comments on how soft her hands are for a servant. "I could swear you are caressing me." At that line, Gaby runs for the house and leaves about three inches of streaky lotion across his back. ***This should make for an interesting photo shoot.*** Back in the kitchen, Gaby is fanning herself. She can't believe she actually got to touch Larry; "I can still feel his skin on my hands; it's as if the world opened up at my feet."

Gaby is still in fantasyland when Lala walks in saying she can't believe the family hid the fact that Marfil was alive for two years. She finally snaps Gaby back to reality. Gaby runs to her room and starts another of her many letters professing her undying love to Larry.

Larry's fiance (I don't have the time to look up if there should be one or two "e's" in fiance) Pilar is at the gym talking to two friends. She basically says she doesn't want to marry Larry. Her friends ask what she's been smoking. "The guy is a hottie and also rich!" "I don't care" says Pilar, "my family is also rich." Her friend Sandy thinks Pilar is making a big mistake and she and Pilar get in a fight. After Pilar storms off, Sandy tell the other friend she's going to tell Larry everything.

O is at her office drinking a cup of something. I doubt it's chamomile tea. Anyway, she ends up dropping the cup and it shatters. She is obviously thinking about her f-2-f with F/G. Emilio (the brother of Max's girlfriend Camila) runs in to O's office to see if she is OK. O is thoroughly rude to him saying everything is fine, and don't let the door hit you on the rear on your way out. O then tells herself she can't believe F/G came to her.

Max calls Camila at the beach and says "we've got to talk." Camila asks him what's up with the serious tone of voice. He says "We'll talk later" and hangs up on her. Max thinks to himself he's got to tell Camila that M/D is alive and break up with her. Camila is simultaneously thinking Max is going to dump her because he (Max) found out that Camila abandoned a baby she had with Dr. Evil five years prior.

Bruna and M/D are alone in the bedroom and M/D is standing up. The two are fighting about why M/D agreed to have Diana as her nurse. "Are you stupid?" asks Bruna. M/D yells back asking "What the heck was I supposed to do under the circumstances. And oh, by the way, who are YOU to call ME stupid!" M/D puts Bruna back in her place and Bruna runs out.

Diana is walking down the stairs when Bruna confronts her about being back at Psycho Mansion. They start to argue and Bruna pushes Diana down the stairs.

Sylvia, Camila's cousin and roommate has Cher's wig on. She is walking three unruly but hysterical dogs. Camila is not happy about the dogs being in the apartment and tells Sylvia she is getting crazier each day. Sylvia is walking the dogs to earn extra money, presumably to buy more wigs. They are squabbling when the doorbell rings. In walks Paola, Larry and Max's sister. "What are you doing here?" ask Camila. "I've come to console you." answers Peyote. C - "About what?" P - "You mean you don't know? My brother Max didn't tell you?" C - "Tell me about what?" P - "Oh, nothing. Nothing at all. I'd better run." Payola leaves within five seconds of arriving. "What the %^&@ is going on? Has everyone gone loco?"

Max discovers Diana in a crumpled heap on the landing with a single trickle of blood coming from one nostril. He rushes to save his damsel in distress.

Bruna returns to M/D's room giggling. "Guess what? I just pushed Diana down the stairs. M/D asks if anyone saw. Bruna says "No one." and gives a Bela Lagosi laugh.

Max carries Diana to a bedroom and pulls a bottle of alcohol from the top dresser drawer. Diana refuses to tell him what happened. Max says he will do the right thing, but he can never love his wife again. Diana tries to talk him into getting back together with M/D, saying it's been a long time for him, but to M/D, it's as if it was the next day. Diana walks out and Max stands there looking sad with tears in his eyes. ***I have feeling there will be a lot of scenes where Max tells Diana he loves her and she tells him nothing can ever come of it.***

Bruna runs into Diana in the hallway and grabs her. Bruna tells Diana if anyone finds out what happened on the stairs, Bruna will kill her. Diana calls Bruna a viper! Diana is summoned to M/D's room. M/D asks Diana to help her in getting Max back. She considered Diana beautiful but dangerous. Diana explains she isn't interested in Max. M/D then goes on and on about how much she and Max were in love prior to the "accident." She would just die if Max left her. Enough said.

Dr. Evil's chauffeur, Andre, calls Camila to tell her Dr. Evil was attacked. Camila doesn't care. Andre suggests that perhaps he could tell the cops that Camila did it. Camila calls him an idiot and hangs up.

Grandma and Diana are playing with dolls. Not only is Grandma playing with dolls, she's playing matchmaker for Diana and Max. Grandma apparently has Alzheimers. Diana explains that Marfil is alive. "Ah, yes. The dead person who isn't dead. They keep her in a locked room."

Diego and his brother Pancho are discussing Pancho's wrecked car.***Apparently it was hit by Peyote in a prior episode. Clearly Pancho has a thing for Peyote.***Diego asks Pancho how he can have so much money when he doesn't work. Pancho says he needs money to keep women interested. Diego says that he (Diego) is only interested in one woman. Diana. Pancho's official girlfriend Carmelo - the one he's been with for years - shows up. Pancho and Caramelo fight about her wanting him to set a wedding date. Carmel than accuses him of having the hots for Peyote.

Camila shows up at Psycho Mansion and recognizes Diana, but she doesn't know from where. Diana is impactada. She hopes Camila doesn't remember that she (Camila) was present when Diana was arrested and accused of assaulting Dr. Evil (who tried to rape Diana) and setting Dr. Evil's house on fire. Max brings Camila into the Library and tells her "Marfil" is alive. He then dumps her. Camila thinks it's a joke at first but then realizes it's not. She is not a happy camper.

Larry is now modeling underwear. Peyote watches and gives him directions. She tells him he's the best model in Miama. Larry has his eyes set on Hollywood, and not Hollywood Florida. He wants everyone to be proud of him.

M/D is showing Diana her photos of the happiest days of her life - when she and Max were in love. She wants to return to those days of wedded bliss. . . You think?!

More fighting between Caramel and Pancho about his allergy to the big "C." If he doesn't marry her, she's going to tell the Police he's involved with smuggling jewelry. (Or whatever illegal thing he's doing with jewelry.)

One of the models tells Larry they need to talk, but Larry is told he needs to change for the next photo shoot. Peyote wants to know what's up. The model says she doubts there will be a wedding in Larry's future since his bride-to-be, Pilar, has stopped planning it.

Camila is screaming at Max for stringing her along for so long and just using her for entertainment. She says "you promised me we'd get married." Max says he never said such a thing. She storms out yelling "I hate you!"

Nancy, a servant and Lala's daughter, comes in to talk to Gaby who is moping about Larry's upcoming nuptials. Gaby says Pilar doesn't love Larry. Nancy says of course Pilar loves Larry, why else would she marry him. Nancy and Gaby have a pity party about how sad it is to love someone who doesn't love you back. She knows because she loves Diego. Alas, they are two poor fools without luck in love.

Diana walks into the library to talk to Max. He admits he was wrong for stringing Camila along for so long. Diana tells him he needs to focus on getting his life back with Marfil. "It's the best medicine for her." "No can do," says Max "my love for Marfil is dead."

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