Caray, Caray!

Aldo is barely tolerating Luigi's vapid flirtation when Marcia screeches for Luigi, who runs out to pacify Marcia. Aldo looks grim as he remembers Lety telling him that Marcia was always rude to her, humiliated her and wanted to fire her.

Luigi brings Marcia into Aldo's office to introduce Aldo. She greets him politely, and Aldo tells her she has pretty eyes the color of the sea. (Luigi bites his fist with envy.) He adds that there is sadness in her eyes. She says he is a perceptive man. Luigi says his friend is a barrel of laughs. He explains that he got Aldo the room so they can work more closely together.

Marcia wants to talk to Luigi. Aldo excuses himself, leaving Luigi and Marcia alone in his office. Marcia enthusiastically says that Luigi has found one very handsome friend! (Wow - this is the most animated I've seen Marcia in many months!) She adds that he's also very charming. "I know that," Luigi agrees happily. He warns Marcia that Aldo is going to fall for him, because he saw Aldo first. He says something like it will happen faster than someone who wants to get out of the closet. Marcia laughs - an unfamiliar sight - which causes her to squeeze her eyes shut. Very tiny vertical lines appear on her forehead around her eyebrows. (Good, the botox is finally starting to wear off! Thank goodness!)

At the Hall O' Justice

At Judges 'R' Us, Fern tells Lety that they share the blame for what happened, but it was mostly his fault, because he caused the company's initial crisis. (Black suit with pale yellow shirt and it looks like a red and orange striped tie. Clearly, this is a man who is not afraid to wear colors.) She says okay, but now the responsibility is hers as president, and she wants to get it over with and never see him again. She'll wait for him at the meeting. Fern excuses himself and leaves.

Save your ice cream for another night. That's all the Fern you're getting for now.

Lety looks sad. RoboPop doesn't notice. He goes to get the car and tells Tomas to look out for Lety. Tomas asks Lety what Fern wanted. She says she'll tell him later, but says she's finding it difficult to be as cold with Fern as she would like.

He asks about the gift she's holding. "It's for the airhead," she giggles. He asks how she likes his tie (it's tied properly today). Lety says that "she" will find it charming. Tomas wonders if "she" will strangle him with it. Lety sighs and says she has to make a decision about the airhead's future.

"Lety, what are you thinking of doing to her?" Tomas cries, pulling out the laminated magazine photo. Lety sighs again.

Meanwhile, back at Conceptos

The cuartel arrives in the main lobby. (Scratch what I said yesterday about PM being dressed slightly more modestly than usual; it was an optical illusion caused by buttoning her jacket.) Despite the fact that they are very late, they hang around the lobby to try to piece the Conceptos situation together. Martha, who seems to be eating a Fudgesicle, asks PM what Lety told her when the lawyers visited Conceptos to size it up for the lien or seizure (I think this happened a long time ago in an episode I didn't see). PM says she was told that she didn't hear or see anything. Irma complains, but PM has no more information to share.

Lola says she doesn't like to gossip, but she thought there was something weird going on between Fern and Lety. Everyone gasps. "Financially," Lola adds. Juana says that Lety seemed not to even want to talk to him last night. Martha mischievously suggests that perhaps there was a romance between them. The others scoff. Noticing the time, Irma scolds them and says they'll be fired for being late. Martha boldly asks who's going to fire them. They all laugh and get on the elevator.

(Meanwhile, down the road apiece, Alicia gets off the bus, hurling insults over her shoulder at the driver and the other passengers, who jeer at her. Disoriented, she complains that she's not cut out to be a poor person. As she finds her way back to Conceptos, we notice a huge run in her stocking.)

In the executive lobby, Lopez is questioning Saimon about the cuartel's whereabouts, when the elevator dings behind them. Seeing that it's the cuartel, Saimon rushes to close the elevator doors and press the Up button before Lopez notices. Saimon says they arrived a long time ago and are having a Code Red in the bathroom. Then he babbles about his name. Marcia comes jiggling by, and Saimon nervously tells her that they've arrived and are in the bathroom.

The elevator door dings a second time. This time, Saimon is not able to protect the cuartel, who push past him impatiently. They don't see Lopez and Marcia. Lola is still bragging that they won't be fired because they're friends of the president. That's when she catches sight of Marcia and says that they were talking about someone in a telenovela who looks just like her. Marcia just wants to know why they're late. They scramble for an explanation and Martha shoves Saimon in front of Marcia. All Saimon can say is "I got here early" and he scurries away.

PM says that they were about to promise that they'd never be late again. Marcia says she's especially tired of PM's promises. Lopez points out that each of them has had two warnings (sanctions, demerits) already, and now he has no choice but to fire them.

Martha chokes on her Fudgesicle and begins to explain about their breakfast with the handsome man, but Irma interrupts and says they were out late last night celebrating Lety's big promotion. Sara says maybe Lety could explain better. Marcia angrily says that Lety can't justify their lateness. Lety being president doesn't make any difference, whether they're VPs or shareholders. This company has rules, and not even the president is above them. (I don't know if Fern ever read that memo.) They whine, and she says she won't tolerate their excuses, their attitudes, their tardiness.

The elevator dings again. It's Alicia, yelling and drawing attention to herself. She asks the cuartel if they're looking for the beauty they've lost. Marcia says that they're going to be fired. This thrills Alicia, until Marcia says it's for extreme tardiness. Alicia then slithers quietly to her desk.

Irma says they realize it's their own fault that they're late, but isn't firing them a rather extreme punishment? Marcia yells some more about Lety's presidency being temporary, and very loudly adds that friendship won't save them. (Alicia hears this and starts poking frantically at her keyboard.) Marcia shouts that it's a company rule and it won't change before, during, or after Lety's presidency, and is that clear, princesses?

Sara asks if this applies to "eeeeeeveryone?", pointing at Alicia, who is now pretending to answer the phone. Marcia says yes. Alicia ditches the phone and comes running over to protest. Marcia jiggles back to her office in disgust.

Alicia begins her verbal abuse - resentful wretches, toads... even she can't be bothered to run through the whole list and says "etc., etc., etc." She asks why can't they keep their tragedies to themselves. She claims that she's never been late before (which might actually be true). She also claims that Lopez sometimes comes in late. She goes on and on. Lopez tries to silence her, with no luck. Sara suggests that they wait till Lety shows up, and then they'll see who gets fired. Lopez does the housefly-grooming routine and says he'll be waiting for all of them in his office.

The cuartel subjects Saimon to some physical and verbal abuse. Sara wants him to go talk to Lopez and Marcia and somehow talk them out of the firing. I can't imagine how he would do that. Lola continues to insist that they won't be fired.

Alicia tells them they're all sick and crazy. The elevator dings yet again, and as the doors slide open behind Alicia, revealing Lety, RoboPop, and Tomas, Alicia continues like a train doing 90 miles an hour.

Alicia: Didn't you hear Marcia? You can't break Marcia's orders. And neither can the tlacoyo - what are you thinking? (Alicia doesn't notice that some of the cuartel are gesturing towards Lety and her posse.) She's no more than a climber who got lucky, you bunch of witches. She's had more luck than you, you poor tlacoyos.

Sara: Airhead, excuse me, are you talking about our friend?

Alicia: Of course.

Sara: The one you called the tlacoyo?

Alicia: Sure, yes, that's the tlacoyo, who else would I be referring to?

Sara: And what else do you call her?

Alicia: She's the tlacoyo bigotón (corncake with a mustache), garnacha (used up old woman, a thick type of tortilla, or a grape - depending on who you ask), sope (a fried tortilla topped with refried beans, onions, and hot sauce), cotorra de circo (circus parrot?), estropajo desparramado (mop?), sapo de charco (puddle-toad), rana de estanque (pond-frog), lombriz de agua prieta (swamp-worm), auto de... what?

Alicia finally realizes that they are pointing behind her. She turns around and sees Lety and her peeps. "Good day, Alicia," Lety greets her. "Ha ha," the cuartel chants. Lety smiles faintly. Alicia is speechless.

"I don't understand," RoboPop says. He asks what's up with the rude woman. She doesn't seem like someone who would be Lety's employee. She seems like an enemy. He tells Lety he wouldn't have to think twice about it - she should be fired immediately. The cuartel agrees. Alicia calls him "Don Erasmo" - impressive how she remembers people's names when the stakes are high - and says that the cuartel provokes her into saying things that she doesn't really feel.

Then she notices Tomas and gets all nasty again. "What are you doing here??" she demands, pointing. Lety, Tomas, and RoboPop all turn, pretending to look around for the person she's pointing at. "That jerk!!"

"Oh, you mean Tomas," RoboPop says. "Don't help me," Tomas asks. Lety introduces Tomas and says he's going to be the new VP of finance. (The feas all start hissing at Alicia, like the sound of air escaping from her head.) Sara taunts Alicia about Lety having authority. There is some more bickering, and then Lola points out that it's very strange for the president's secretary to be wearing torn stockings. Everyone stares at Alicia's overexposed legs. Sara thinks that's going to be the last straw in getting Alicia fired. Alicia runs off crying to Marcia's office.

Lety wants to know what's going on. They all sing in unison, "they fired us, Lety!" For some reason, this makes Lety smile.

The cuartel fill her in on the altercation with Marcia, and tell her that Marcia was challenging her authority. They tell Lety she has to show Marcia she can't treat her like a secretary. (They all address Tomas as "young man." Ouch.)

Lopez and Saimon come out of Lopez's office. Lopez tells Saimon to forget it and don't get involved. Then he tells the cuartel he's waiting for them in his office. They all crowd behind Lety, RoboPop, and Tomas and beg Lety to protect them. Lety tells Lopez that he can't make this decision without asking her opinion. (The cuartel applauds.) Lopez explains that rules are rules, and they apply to Lety's friends too. And Marcia -

Lety interrupts and repeats that before he decides, he must consult her. (He bows slightly. No housefly business.) Lety says she'll discuss this with Marcia.

Then she introduces Tomas to Lopez. Lopez does his scalp thing, but this time he raises his hand over his head higher than usual, perhaps in admiration of Tomas's tall hair. :-) "Welcome, Don Tomas," he says.

She introduces her father. Saimon gets his name wrong, as usual. RoboPop gives his full name (Erasmo Padilla Galarza!) and I notice that they're looping his voice again - it's really obvious. José José must not have had any wind that day. Yikes. They explain that he's going to be in charge of accounting. Lopez shakes his hand for a long time.

Lety tells the cuartel she wants to know why they arrived so late. They drag her into the restroom and tell her about the handsome man they had breakfast with. They go on and on about how fine he was. She asks why they think he's gay. They say it's because Luigi had to "rescue" him from them.

Martha is particularly impressed with his enthusiasm about food. Lety says that reminds her of a friend. They want to hear all about him, but Lety deflects and asks how it was. They talk about how the flesh was weak and therefore they gave in and had breakfast with him, until Irma flipped out and made them go to the office.

In Marcia's office

Alicia complains that it's a dark day for her - that desgraciado Tomas Mora is the new VP of finance. Imagine that, she exclaims. "They just said that to bother me, right?" Marcia, who looks like she might actually be in the middle of doing some work, says no, it's true - they talked about it at the meeting. Alicia says Marcia needs to do something about this, because these people are taking over the company. She also describes how RoboPop's first words were that Alicia should be fired. She urges Marcia to pull some strings so they don't all get fired. Marcia just narrows her big, sad eyes at Alicia.

"You're listening to me, right, Marcia?" She tells Marcia not to be manipulated by them. Marcia says that Alicia deserves it. How many times did she call her and tell her to hurry up? And what time did she arrive?

Alicia says she doesn't know the great drama she's been through today. She warns Marcia to hold onto her seat: she had to RIDE THE BUS!

Marcia spins her chair a little and gazes at the ceiling.

"You're listening to me, right?? Today I had to TAKE THE BUS to Conceptos."

"Oh, how awful for you," Marcia answers with tired sarcasm. Alicia chides her for making fun and asks "when have you ever TAKEN THE BUS?" "Never," Marcia answers cheerfully, "and I hope I never have to." Alicia complains about the naco driver and the fare of MX$2.50 which is about 23 cents in US money. And how it was smelly and crowded like sardines. Alicia says Marcia doesn't know what it's like to get up without breakfast, without food. It's very sad.

She notices that Marcia's eyes are closed. (I think Elizabeth Alvarez is getting her revenge on us for all those blinking jokes. Um, Chris started it!) She says it's rude to sleep when someone is speaking. She complains some more about being hungry. She says there were guys staring at her with lustful eyes, thinking about raping her. She begs Marcia (who is now making all kinds of faces) to keep it a secret just between them. How awful it would be if people were saying "Alicia Ferreira, ex-wife of Mauricio Birmann, who studied six semesters of finance in a distinguished, prestigious university, one day GOT ON A BUS."

Marcia yawns and asks Alicia if she thinks today is an exception. Does she think tomorrow will be any different? Alicia says yes, of course! Everything will be changed by then. It has to be different. She doesn't think she can ever GET ON A BUS again.

Marcia asks what Alicia is going to do that will change things. Alicia says she doesn't know, but what about Marcia? Marcia says she doesn't have the solution. Alicia tells Marcia that it would be bad for Marcia's image if her best friend (I would say her only friend), the spectacularly beautiful, nice, intelligent blonde... RODE THE BUS! Wouldn't Marcia be embarrassed? If people were saying that Alicia's stockings got torn, her best friend, the secretary to the president of Conceptos... She shows Marcia the torn stocking. "Do you see? Do you see this here?" Marcia peeks from the hand covering her face, trying to hide a smile. "It's not fair!!" Alicia whines.

Marcia says she's sorry, but she can't do anything about it. Her fairy godmother (her profit dividends from Conceptos) has disappeared, and now she has to depend on her salary. All because of Lety's lien, she adds. And now it's all up to Lety.

Alicia is sure that Lety will fire her. She says the cuartel is telling Lety that Marcia's orders don't matter any more, and that Marcia is a nobody. Well, not that, Alicia corrects herself, but a Doña Nobody.

Marcia says she's going to show Lety and the cuartel that this business has rules, and the rules must be kept.

Luigi calls. He's not finished with his storyboards, or his script, or something yet for the commercial. Marcia accuses him of hanging around with his "friend" Aldo. (Alicia's ears perk up.) Marcia warns him to get his work done and slams the phone down. (Do they make padded phones?)

Alicia asks who Aldo is. Marcia says he's been the only good thing about her day so far. She doesn't know where Luigi found him, but he's really handsome. Alicia gets excited about this and asks if he's married. Is he financially solvent? Marcia says why don't you ask me if he's gay like Luigi? Alicia shrugs and says that doesn't matter to her.

In Aldo's new office

Aldo is unpacking his things and telling Luigi that he'd like to meet Lety, the new president. Luigi impatiently asks why he'd want to speak with her. Aldo says it'd be nice to let her know that he's occupying this space, at least. Luigi informs him that this space is part of Luigi's domain, and he doesn't need to tell anyone how he's using it, least of all the platypus. Aldo gently reminds Luigi not to make these kinds of remarks about people. Abashed, Luigi is silenced. Aldo says he prefers and needs to tell Lety that he's using this space.

Later, more furniture arrives. Luigi says he wants to get Aldo a little picture of flowers to give the place a feminine touch. Aldo chuckles tolerantly. (You know who can draw flowers? Lety. I'm just sayin'.) Luigi flutters away and Aldo's phone rings. (No phone call jokes this time, I promise.) It's Carolina. He tells her he's excited to have this office because it will let him work on his two big projects: his book and restaurant (apparently those only count as one together), and more important, being near Lety to help her solve all of her problems which are also his problems. Heh, good luck with that, Aldo. He invites Caro to come visit him any time and says goodbye.

I've noticed that Aldo usually refers to Lety as Leticia. (I'm too lazy to type it that way.) I like that he doesn't call her by her nickname.

Later, Aldo is on the phone again with a pal in Acapulco. There's more talk about the floors, and the paint he picked out for the walls is called "tierra" (soil; earth). He wants his pal to find it so the restaurant will open on time. He says what would you do if you wanted to secure a woman's love? Open a restaurant.

Alicia peeks into the office during this fascinating conversation and jumps for joy in the hallway. She claps her hands and thanks God for sending her such a beautiful man. She peeks again and bites her lip.

Luigi walks in on the phone call, then backs out to check on Alicia. Aldo follows too, takes one look at Alicia's starry eyes, and goes back into the office to continue the conversation.

Luigi demands to know what Alicia is doing in his "territory." She says at first, today everything was dark and gloomy. But now a miracle has happened - that guy in there is rich, charming, nice, and single.

Luigi tells her that she can't touch him. He's Luigi's friend. Annoyed, Alicia reminds him that he already has a boyfriend, and not to be greedy. Luigi says first, his relationship with Ruli has been deteriorating. Not that he owes her an explanation. And second, he wants Aldo for himself. Now! He goes into Aldo's office.

Alicia looks disgusted and says to herself, "Luigi, you can't do this to me."

Aldo finishes up his call. Luigi says "Aldo, since you like the sea, look at what I brought you." (You know who can draw the sea? Lety. I'm just sayin'.) He's holding a small framed picture, the kind you would buy at Target, but Alicia drapes herself against the doorframe and says "me!"

"No, I brought you a picture," Luigi says. Alicia dodges around him and introduces herself to Aldo with a hug and kiss. "I'm charmed by your charm," he says politely. "But that's not all," Alicia tells him. "Besides being nice and charming, a natural blonde and of the highest quality, I'm very capable. I work here at Conceptos, I stuidied six semesters of finance at a university of great prestige, and at Conceptos I am the... well, I can't say exactly what my function is but today I am going to be promoted." I keep expecting her to ask him to examine her teeth.

Luigi holds up the painting and asks Aldo if he likes it.

"I'm charmed," Aldo answers. Alicia is flattered. "Not you, dummy," Luigi corrects her. Aldo says it's very nice and thanks Aldo for trying to make him feel at home. Alicia asks Aldo what he'll be doing here, Luigi says she's wasting his time and tells her go away. Aldo says it's not a waste of time to get to know someone - in fact, it's nice. But, he tells Alicia, he does have a lot to do.

As she turns to leave, Luigi notices the tear in her stockings and makes a big deal out of it. She says she caught her ring on it. She says something about costume jewelry. Luigi says it's more likely that she got a bottlecap stuck on her heel. Embarrassed, Alicia excuses herself and slowly backs out of the room.

"Ah, women," Luigi sighs to Aldo. "They were the great error of divine creation."

Aldo tells Luigi to please not let him waste any more of his time. Deflated, Luigi says he could go and work on his commercial. But what will Aldo do? Aldo says he'll occupy himself with his own stuff.

After Luigi leaves, Aldo says the first thing he wants to occupy himself with is Leticia. "Bunch of crazies," he mutters as he sits at his desk.

The phone rings again. It's Ma Bell. She wants Aldo to stop doing so many phone scenes because I can't stop making these stupid phone call jokes.

The cliffhanger

After interviewing the cuartel in the restroom, Lety returns to the lobby and tells Lopez that she wants to ask Luigi's new friend about the incident.

Just then, Alicia backs into the executive lobby, and Saimon draws attention to her torn stocking. He says her golden legs are a good complement to her bleached blond head. She thanks him sarcastically and returns to her desk.

Lopez says that Luigi's friend can't possibly justify their being late. Lety says she'll discuss it with Lopez later. She tells the cuartel to get to work, and later she'll tell them what she and Marcia decide. She reminds Lopez to show her, Tomas, and RoboPop to their offices. He asks them to follow him.

Half a second later, Aldo enters the lobby and asks to meet with the president. "Does she know you want to see her?" Lola asks. "No, she doesn't know that I'm here," he answers.

"She's busy, but if you want to, you can wait," Sara informs him breathlessly from a distance of about four inches.

"Okay, thanks," Aldo says. And with that, the Golden Ring of Goodbye closes around them.

---

Next week
Lety and Aldo are reunited. Wheeeee!

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