Monday, May 28, 2007

Destilando Amor 05/28/07 Rod Stalks, Gavi Balks, Beni Talks

We begin by rehashing the big Tequila Junto... the one Mariana/Gavi ran out of the meeting jumps in her econo batmobile... takes off, Rod comes running out jumps in his luxury batmobile... leaving the car guy a wad of cash, as Rod pulls off... Isa/TWB & Minnnnnerrrrrvvva pull up in a luxury SUV... *****Think Taupe... is every TWB outfit (except for her boinking Hil outfits Taupe? "Oh I just love those CFM thigh high boots, do you perhaps have them in taupe?" "I just love that dress and I'm sure I won't need any undergarments with it, yes black is nice... but say do you have it in Taupe?" Jest sayin... the world is full of color... explore, not everything should be three shades lighter than your skin and five shades darker than your hair... the "Goldfinger Girl" look is becoming dated.

On the inside, Pamela's Pa is telling her to stop messy around with Aaron... "Oh Pa I love him"... Pa takes off. Isa & Minnie stroll in and Minnie has Aarondar going, but Aaron is way ahead of her and has NagDar on, his eyes quickly move from side to side and like a laser beam zoom right in on the Nag... Quick hide my wife is here... .Pamela the much accommodating Amante disappears... Minnie and TWB walk up to Aaron, "What are you doing here?"Aaron asks. Minnie counters, "Did it require a special invite?" "Amorcito", says Aaron giving his spouse a kiss.

TWB who is doing her version of GavDar is scanning the room... "Where is Rod?"... Aaron is quick to say Rod left, (deflecting attention from himself), where is Mariana? She left right before Rod... Eeeeekkkkkk did they leave together?

Now for some serious Tequila talk... Some guy is talking about the fine standards of Tequila and how Mexico must meet these requirements... Aaron is twitching... "Okay why are you really here?" Aaron queries crazy Minnie again... "Cause I wanted to see if you were gonna hook-up with Pamela again?". Aaron counters that is history, and now they are at a boring meeting & look no Pamela. TWB tired of the whole sham, just wants to go home.

*****This reminds me of highschool where your lame ass friend drug you to some party by telling you some guy was gonna be there and instead she lied and just didn't want to go by her self to check out some dork she was interested in*****
Oh well if you can't use your friends who can you use? I am sure this served a duel purpose 1) To check up on Aaron 2) To add miracle grow to that seed of doubt, Minnie has been cultivating in TWB's brain about Rod & Mariana...

Now then Rod is in hot pursuit of Gavi, but he has lost her... .he is despondent, parked in his usual spot, the one he rents by the month across the street from her apartment. It has a sign "reservado para el estacionamiento del pursuer " and he has the "stalker parking" plastic parking permit hanging from his rearview mirror. Well Rod is all shades of upset and having that crazy talk conversation with himself again... He has lost her, literally not figuratively.

The reason for his loss is Gavi is hangin out with Ma and Beni (the good hearted Italian) in La
Malquerida, Clarita is teaching Beni how to artistically eat salt and follow it up with a nice big shot of Tequila. Gavi laments some about poor Don Artemio, who has lost everything..due to the great Hawaiian Tequila Scandal. ****I think they many be running those "If you or a loved one drank Montalvo Tequila in the past three months, and suffer from blindness, insanity or death, you may be entitled to monetary compensation, call 1-800-Tequila... .we don't get paid until you get paid*****ads on Hawaiian TV.

Meanwhile back at the meeting, Aaron makes a dash for the ladies WC (water closet)... where Pamela, who is doing her best imitation of Strawberry Shortcake, is hiding out... Aaron tells her to come out, Minnie & Isa have gone. Pamela says that’s it, she has had it... no mas, but Aaron reptilian eyes flick and he tells her, he loves Pam and he plans to divorce Minnie... Pamela has the muy impacted look.

Rod arrives home and TWB, begins the twenty question routine... .Rod is evasive... next we see her in her Red Robe, coming into Rod's room... he is asleep and she does the "Are you asleep" routine, yeah my husband loves it when I do that, cause I want to make some point.
Anyway, she vows to stop the jealousy and can we now talk about the petri dish and mixing up our DNA? Whoa there little cowgirl... Rod says, I'm not sure I'm ready for this... Isa has this "Que the Hell?" look on her face... I gotta say here, I do agree come on, you went to the doctor. What did you think it was for? Are you now on page one in the "Sperm Donors Catalog"?... Dude on your profile I seriously recommend you lie about your SATs. Rod wants to put the idea on hold for a month or so... TWB looks none too pleased.

Meanwhile James is having a total breakdown in the local Tequila hospital... the Doctor says Acacia has had a blow to the head and is in a coma, she may die.

Months Pass

Guess what? Rod is sitting outside Gavi's apartment, well it is okay, he is in his special parking spot... Clara and a friend come out, Rod puts like three fingers of each hand up to cover his face... Oh good disguise dude..well it appears to work... Rod gets out and going right past Gavi's neighbor, goes to her apartment and rings the bell. Gavi and Beni are inside whipping up some Chicken Parmesan... Gavi answers the door and after some arguing, she lets him in... Gavi explains who Beni is... the guy who saved her in Paris and gave her money to go find Rod in London. Rod looks so fourteen, but he thanks Beni and they shake hands... Gavi & Rod go downstairs and have yet another little argument on the street... Rod is in full crazy mode he grabs Gavi and kisses her, she pulls away and she dives right into the kiss. He begs her to tell him that she loves him. Haaaa, you will never hear those words from me, she answers. She turns to leave and go back in, but gives him another quick peck... .

Rod is standing on the street, grinning and saying she loves me she loves me... .He then ****and trust me I am shuddering as I type this**** kisses his own hands and rubs them all over his face... So is this what a fan looks like at a Jaime Camil sighting? I fear Rod will never wash his face again... .

As this is going on... TWB is having lunch with Sofia at the club... the girls are wearing Tennis White, what no taupe? Anyway, TWB tells Sofia that Rod has put the brakes on Insemination Central... .Sofia says "As if, just go behind his back and use his spunk, he'll be happy you did". Even TWB has a oh no you didn't... look on her face... .Oh Sofia how come when Aaron is a Rat it is fun, but you just come off as dried up and hateful?

Now to the long term care hospital in Tequila... James has used this passage of time to grow a manly moustache... he is talking to Acacia who is still in a coma, but adding insult to injury, she now has a tube shoved up her nose, I'm not really sure why. Maybe it is dramatic license, so we know she is really not up to snuff. James loves her, can't live without her... he seems to be a bit down over the fact that she just lays there. He tells her about the peanuts... ****I looked this up, it takes a crop of peanuts like 120 days, I feel like he has been waiting to grind out that first jar of Skippy's for years now****

Meliton is busy maintaining his drunk demeanor in the Cantina, all the patrons look pretty happy, cause while they have to listen to the town's drunken incestuous rapist, they are spared listening to "The Best of Gavi, Vol I". I believe Meliton may be trying to pin the blame on James.

Rod is driving down the streets of Mexico City, talking to his best friend Rod... She loves me... blah blah blah, grinning showing off those pearly whites (which actually are far more in proportion to his head than Aldo's mighty LFMB chiclets); why he is just gonna dump TWB & marry Gavi.
Rod is called to a lovely luncheon with TWB's parasite parents. TWB takes Mom away and Dad proceeds to drill Rod about staring a family. Rod says a kid is a lot of responsibility, Dad says hey, TWB's Ma and I almost divorce before she was born... I was boinking someone else and then wifey got pregnant, well that certainly straighten out my priorities and we have been blissful ever since. Dad also through in some blather about his business and I think Rod may be going to be fleeced by the parents as well as the daughter.

Back at Gavi Acres, Beni is like well... if you love him... But Gavi says the love can not be... he is married. Beni, being an Italian and on a first name basis with the Pope, informs her that a divorce would be no problemo as they have not consummated the marriage... .thus grounds for an annulment... .

Back to the Hospital... James comes in and says it is only 15 days until Christmas and he has a present for Acacia... he has a music box... it begins to play... we see the television screen in her head where she is thought bubbling the time James gave her the other music box. Acacia moves a finger. James goes wild, the doctors come in and pull up an eyelid, shining a light in her eyes. She has reaction to stimulus... Egads it is a miracle, her eyes open, but she just lies there staring straight ahead, really pretty much like she normally looks.

Now Rod comes into the office and he is all excited and happy, the office is decorated for Christmas... Gavi was had the whole office area decorated and Rod's office too has been decorated. Rod gets a phone call from James with the good news... he tells Rod about Acacia coming out of the coma. Well good friend that Rod is, he take this as a sign that James would love nothing better than to hear endless dribble about Gavi & Rod, yeah I'm sure that is why he called. Gavi comes in and Rod tells her that they are going to have to work late to finish the end of the year balances. She says okay... .Rod is certain that tonight he will demonstrate his love... .
Oh I am cringing again...

Shout out to Rod Stewart
Tonight's the night
It's gonna be all right
Cause I'm in love with you girl
Ain't nobody gonna stop us now
C'mon angel my hearts on fire
Don't deny your man's desire
You'd be a fool to stop this tide
Spread your wings and let me come inside

Rod looks like the geeky freshman in Nat'l Lampoon movies who thinks he is the "Love Master" and he is gonna get some... .

In Gavi's office she is in a conversation with Don Artemio, who on the other end looks like he is one noose away from climbing up on the chair and hanging himself... Gavi tells him to just hang on a little longer, everything will be okay...

Onate slips in and she signs a paper to ship 400,000 thousand liters of Tequila to (I think the Middle East), maybe I am wrong about the location... .Cause hey aren't they Muslim, no alcohol?

Isa goes to the doctor and tells him to get that bun in her oven... like yesterday, the doctor say that is impossible, cause they have to wait tell the right time and he is going on vacation... Scary TWB comes out and says she must get pregnant NOW..

Onate slips the invoice past Rod also. Rod tells Elvira to send everyone home early cause he has to work on the balances with Mariana... Elvira has this "Yeah Balancing her on top of the Desk" look on her face... Elvira speed dials TWB and fills her in.

TWB simply will not put up with Rod switching Mariana for Gavi... she will stop this. She calls Rod and starts questioning him about tonight... he hangs up on her.

Meanwhile Aaron has come back from Miami and Onate fills him in on the balances problem... Aaron questions Rod, asking if Rod is looking for a little fling with Gavi.

Gavi goes home and Clarita gets her Christmas present as bigscreen TV to view the TeleNovelas and they are going to give the old one to Dona Jose (the lady who helped them when they came to Mexico City).

Tomorrow... .looks like TWB (in Taupe) and Sofia (in a conservative black cardigan and white turtle neck) are gonna crash the party.

*****Disclaimer, to anyone wondering about the taking of sperm, well Young and Restless did this several years ago... with the sperm that made the rounds in Geona City, the female was never forgiven, by the viewers... just go to the Young & Restless site on TeleVision without pity and search on "Sperm Pig"... viewers never forgive or forget... ****

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Comments:
Beckster~~~You are my hero...Thanks for the outrageously funny recap and mucho giggles. I especially loved the ''balancing her on the top of the desk '' comment, and my new favorite saying will be , ''Que the hell ! '' Loved it , loved it, want some more of it. That was a great way to start my day. You are a wicked, wicked woman. p.s. Is Pamela's daddy the doctor from ''Duelo?''
 

I've decided, for the sake of my own sanity and also so I won't gnash my teeth down to stubs, that when Isa poisoned Rod with that special bruja poison of eternal love, it struck his braincells particularly hard (some people are more sensitive to drugs than others) and that's why he's become such a moron. It's not his fault.

Gavi has become strong and purposeful and clever - and he's just gone into a deep pit of IQ goo. Poor lad. He'll never finish his degree now. "There go the piano lessons."
 

I forgot to say - loved the recap - the fashion observations - and I laughed so hard at your observation re: the peanut farm.

Yeah, Meliton told his fellow borrachos that James had been "abusing" Acacia. (You novela newbies, that's a code word for unwanted boinking.)

I enjoyed the way Oñate and Aaron got so nervous when they found out Rod and Gav are meeting "to go over all the business accounts behind closed doors" - they think their little scheme is going to be discovered and all Rod wants is to get Gav into some bubblebath.
 

Strawberry Shortcake and Goldfinger --loved those..... spit the morning coffee out my nose practically reading your bar scene description and "Gavi's Greatest Hits Vol. 1".....and the Elvira description about balancing Gavi on the desktop.......

Thanks for another excellent morning gigglefest, beckster!
 

I'm suggesting Rod get the same abogado as Aaron in a "two for one special divorce"..Minnie is not going to know what hit her when Aaron comes down with the big D-I-V-O-R-C-E..Rod needs to get some "backbone & guts", instead of keeping that witch Isadora he's married to and Gavi on the side..

The storyline of James & Acacia is creeping me out..I don't know about others here and their thoughts,but these two together, along with the sleezy uncle seems like incest here..Am I way off base here?
 

James and Acacia isn't incest at all. Acacia and her uncle is not only "incest," but rape.

I've been thinking about how dumb Rodrigoo is and I think I've figured it out. He's an agave. He has reached maturity, which means you must cut off all of his hair. That will cause his brain to swell and fill with thoughts. Eventually (like in the very last episode) he'll figure out everything he's done wrong, and then it will be time for the harvest.

The only problem with that comparison is that it leaves the door open for zombies to feast on his brain.

Hey. A few months from now, we might be grateful for the excitement.
 

If you will humbly allow me to add my new small voice to this WONDERFUL recap blog, I would be ever so grateful! I have depended on you FABULOUS gals (and guys?)to help me keep up with this intriguing telenova and I just wanted to express my gratitude. WHOEVER wrote this one is HILARIOUS!! I was thinking many of the same things you so brilliantly put into words!! I love Eduardo Yanez (Rod) and have since "I'll Love You in Silence" (even though that telenova was a bit ridiculous at times) and was so glad to see him back on my tele screen. Since my Spanish is anything but fluent, I depend on you guys (and my son's tenth grade Spanish Textbook, to get me through another day. (LOL)
Thank You so much for your time invested in creating and keeping these recaps going! There are many of us out here on the other side of the computer screen who really appreciate them!!
...Oh, I agree about Rod acting like a seventeen year old. Do you think he will give Gavi his class ring and football jersey to wear tonight? LOL
 

Thanks Julie for the correction..Yes, I knew no incest with James..Understand the rape,as Acacia is not a willing participant..Still creepy..Thanks again,Maureen
 

Thanks Becky, I was looking forward to your recap - as I've said before - much better than the actual saga. It seems as if our mentally deficient hero - Rod - is going to try to seduce Gavi - in the office of all places.
 

How can it be rape, when acasia goes along with it for the sake of inheriting money/land???? Incest yes, but rape??
 

Totally freaking hilarious! You should work for money. Thanks so much for all the entertainment. My Spanish is so bad, looking at the telenovela is like looking at a silent movie and you provide all the verbal excitement. WOW! Melanie
 

Acacia "goes along with it"? Huh, I must have misunderstood why he's been beating her.
 

I cnt believe that someone would actually think Acacia is not being raped.

Her staying on with the uncle so that she can get the farm must be some wicked revenge on her side.

For some reason i think that everything all ready belongs to her,the uncle is just trying to keep her under his thumb.

*cindy*
 

It is indeed sad and disgusting to witness Acacia's abuse by her uncle (by marriage). But isn't incest defined as sex between blood relatives?
 

Thanks for the recap Beckster. More classic quotes to use from you "Que the hell" for one.

Karen
 

I think so too, Cindy. Or maybe it's in trust, or whatever you call it, so that when she reaches a certain age it'll automatically become hers.

But since she's in such a hurry to kill him, I'm guessing that she doesn't know that (if it's true at all). If so, it would be nice if she could find that out now and kick him out. He would probably try to come back and burn the place down, but with any luck he'd be too drunk to escape alive anyway.

(I keep forgetting he's only her uncle by marriage.)

I am probably going to be saying "que the hell" for a long time. And no one outside of Caray Caray will know why because it will sound like "K the hell." :)
 

Thanks for the great recap. After that kiss, Rod will never wash his face again....loved that comment!
 

Beckster, your recap was ab fab on so many levels!

I know I will probably get crucified by the Rod Squad, but I think I liked Rod better when he was a grumpy drunk. His extreme good mood makes my teeth hurt. Isn't there a clinical name for that kind of mood swing? Oh well, he'll probably take a giant tumble soon and I will no doubt be griping about Mr. Grumpy Drawers again.

What's up with Hilario's hair? It looks like he's auditioning for the local rockabilly band.

There are a few Destilando/Duelo crossovers. Pam's daddy is the tall local Doc (#1) in Duelo, the one who keeps sending his patients to the local bruja Luba, who is also Clarita (#2) in Destilando. Luba is currently getting chased down by a mob led by Jaime who moonlights as Oñate (#3) in Destilando. Everybody in Duelo land is terrorized by DonLoco who is currently getting treated by a Doctora Aida Loca who is none other than the bosom-busting San Juana (#4). I think those are the only crossovers.

Thanks Beckster!
 

Okay, what does CFM stand for in regards to TWB's boots? I work for a church and CFM means Continuing Formation Ministry. In a twisted way it works, but I don't think that's what y'all are talking about here...
Loved "que the hell"
Good thinking Rod, Make your stand for Gavi in the office. Your jealous wife will never think to look there and I'm sure the night janitor won't mention to the other staff members the wandering minstrels, roses or waiters that just happened to show up to help you balance the books...

Marg. in Minnesota
 

Beckster, HA-HA-HA-LAIOUS!

Marg, I tried to think of a way to explain CFM without actually writing it (since I'm at work)... Try this: "Come Fxxx Me"... It refers to shoes that emit a "come hither" aura... please advise if you need it spelled out more clearly... hee hee!
 

Marg in MN: I had to ask the same question early on so I will pass on the favor: CFM means come f*** (rhymes with duck) me.

p.s. are you possibly another U of M grad like me?
 

Alma: I like your explanation better!!
 

You are in for a few surprises.. . I know the near future but I won't ruin it for you..It is nice to know a Mexican who calls home and watches the Mexican gossip shows.

I will say that Roddy is really beginning to irk me..and at the same time amuse me..
He acts like every one of my Latino High school students..
 

Making my acceptance speech....

Thank you all so much for your warm support...but I can't take all the credit...I would like to offer my eternal gratitude to all the actors and actresses who put there own personal self interest aside and so dramatically overacted...thus giving me smirk, snark and mock factor to the nth degree..Also to the writers who properly keep all the good people stupid and the smart people evil...

Keep up the bad work....This is a partnership and the writers and actors keep my job easy

Thank you again
 

Jardinera and Alma,
Thank you. Although heavily nuanced, I was able to read between the lines figure out exactly what you were trying to get across.

Alas, Jardinera, I am not a U of M graduate. I went to school out of state and missed our beautiful lakes for seven long years (grad school). I'm not Rod slow!

Marg. in Minnesota
 

OMG ! it's getting very exciting

then come a sudden halt ! Got Busted so fast? why? I hope this time Rod. would be man enough to tell Ice that he wants a D I V O R C E ! so he can marry the love of his life. enough already of making Rod. think and act idiot ! the story is getting exciting but frustrating at the same time.
sp
 

Thanks for the CFM clarification, silly naive me thought it was name brand. Imagine if I go to a store asking for that brand of boots, LOL

Great recap and comments, they had me laughing.

There go the piano lessons, HA, it made me think of mystery science theatre (being that was the last time I heard it)

:-)
 

I was really surprised that after so many months Isa was not pregnant! How long will her odds last and who will be the lucky daddy?
 

Marycelis, admittedly it's not a brand, but if you go to the store and ask for CFM boots, they will probably just smile and bring you several pair to try on. :)
 

thanks dear beckster!! and that taupe observation was brilliant! too bad i missed the 'tell me u love me' part...i got chills just imagining rod's puppy eyes while saying that.
 

I am in complete agreement with Becky's complaint regarding lack of color in Isa's wardrobe. At the same time I find that I am unable to muster any enthusiasm for Gavi's powder blue suit. I wish Clint and Stacy would show up with their trash can and credit card and get them on track. What not to wear, indeed!
 

I for one have no objection to CFM boots per se. I am quite sure the weekday meteorologist for Primer Impacto would pull these off quite tastefully.
 

Zingo, Liam!!
 

Now that Beckster has pointed out Izzy's taupe-and-beige color scheme, I find myself wondering... what colors would look good on her? Jewel tones make her look washed-out, and pastels aren't popular at the moment.

So, what colors can she wear so that she won't be Monochrome Woman forever? Does she just need to expand her "neutrals" collection a bit to include shades of khaki, or are there even more exotic shades she can wear?
 

I just discovered you guys the other day and I AM HOOKED!!!! Some of your recaps are hilarious!!! I have watched destilando amor since the beginning, but my spanish is "un poquito" It is getting better though. At least telemundo novelas do offer english captioning. Hopefully univision will offer it soon too. But now that I've found you guys, they can take their time. Once again, finding you made my day!!! carmella
 

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