Caray, Caray!

Lorena and Zulema talk about Salsa Borracha and Salsa Negra with dried chipotles. Zulema tells Lorena she's getting supplies for her first catering gig. They smell chiles together and smile.

The head doctora summons Alonso and tells him the famous Snortensia Armendariz (Snorty from now on) is having a gala affair for her pet project the eye clinic. She wants Al to be the representative for the clinic. No matter that he's not an eye doctor, he's an eye taco (taco de ojo = babe) and that's all that matters. (OK, I paraphrased, she said he was charming.)

Rosy and Julian, in a carefully choreographed scene, accidently run into each other. It's love at first crash.

Bitchy Paula scolds her Papi for eating too much ice cream. She gets sweet for about 2 seconds then hits him up for a loan. He suggests she get a job.

Julian tells Rosy he didn't know there was a banquet company with the name Armendariz because, how odd, that's his stepfather's name. Rosy supposes there's no connection because her boss lady is insufferable. Julian wants to meet Rosy after work.

The market mutual admiration society must conclude...Zulema and Julian leave, Rosy swoons, and Lorena says she's never met such a nice woman. She's an absolute angel (pan de dios = bread of God). Rosy pipes up that her son is the bread and she'd like to eat him right up.

Alonso gives Bruno hell for being a chauvinist pendejo who won't take responsibility for his girlfriend. Bruno complains that he's sure she got pregnant in order to trap him. Bruno thinks a kid would be a disgrace. Alonso thinks a kid is a blessing. Bruno bad. Alonso good.

Clingy and desperate Diana calls Bruno again. He tells her to butt out of his life; this is the last time he answers his phone. She begs him not to abandon her.

Back in the quaint home filled with love Julian asks Mami if she believes in love at first sight. She thinks he means Lorena but "No ma, I like the other." She calls him an enamoradizo (falls in love easily) and tells him to get to work on the Cochinita Pibil. Darn, that means chopping onions, he moans.

Over at the kitchen Snorty does a walk-through to test the menu items for the ambassador's dinner. The staff quakes.

Julian cries and no wonder, the kid is absolutely mangling the onions. Instead of teaching him knife skills Mami puts a piece of bread on his head to stop the tears. She tells him another method is to cut the onions in half, put them in the fridge and zero tears. (But a smelly fridge.) He turns on the radio and dances with the bread on his head. I wondered what in the hell this scene was for but I think it's supposed to show how a loving family behaves. Instead of screaming or stealing the grandkid and giving it to an orphanage you put bread on your head and dance.

Snorty tastes a layered appetizer...horrendous! Then some kind of fish on pasta with pesto...vile! Finally a chocolate thing sprouting a carmelized sugar corkscrew...She can't serve any of this, sneers the left side of her face! What other menu do they have for tomorrow?

Lorena pipes up, how about Squash Blossom Soup, Chalupitas with Chicken Guerrero style, or why not a good Fish Veracruz? Snorty and her red-headed puppy named Jaqui sneer at the new kid. Snorty calls her a simple peeler of potatoes (pelapappas), does she know what Foie Gras in a Pinot Noir reduction is? Has she studied in Paris, NY or Spain? Snorty turns to the head chef Maruja and demands three foie gras choices tomorrow! Jaqui insults Lorena on her way out.

Lorena believes that if Snorty really wants to impress the ambassador she should serve authentic Mexican food. I think I see where this story line is going.

Zulema excitedly shows Omar all the money she got from the Don Pancho gig. They are poor but in love. They're really hitting us over the head with this.

Alonso meets Lorena after work and when she gripes about her dreadful boss he mentions he once did an appendectomy on her granddaughter. She says Snorty's insufferable and her little dog too! They have no respect for anyone, and she won't let that woman ruin her morale.

Dario the deadbeat dad gives daughter Betina some money. He says he did his best to make work things out peacefully but her mama keeps fighting. She wishes he still lived with them. He's all Thank God I'm not and I'll buy your love by taking you shopping. He agrees to pick her up after school even though it's not his day. That'll make mom happy.

Lorena tells the night watchman that Snorty is neurotic. Does she ever smile? Does she have a family? Night watchmen says something about the family starting at the bottom, I couldn't understand the rest but it had to do with Snorty's husband I think. Probably they got rich and hated each other. He adds there is one son that works there but(mysterious music plays so pay attention)they say she had another and he died long ago.

Alonso shows up for his appointment with Snorty, sees Rosy and asks about Lorena.

Meanwhile Maruja is giving a tutorial on foie gras while Lorena takes notes. They have Pan Seared Foie Gras with Fig Sauce, Truffled Foie Gras with Wild Mushrooms, and Foie Gras in a Black Cherry Compote on a crisp Carmelized Apple. Chef is impressed at Lorena's note-taking.

The puppy Jaqui skitters out into the waiting room and tells Alonso to follow her. He gives her the stink eye as he recognizes she's the hussy who's boinking his brother in law and causing sis's meltdowns. Jaqui actually has the nerve to ask him to intercede on her behalf but he's No way I stay out of my crazy sister's business.

Snorty meets Alonso and practically cracks her face smiling at him. She can't...quite...get her mouth to turn up.

Uh oh, new characters. A pretty lady has just picked up a cute little girl from school. Little girl loves it when Mami walks her home. I recognize the lady now, she's Valeria from Dr. Hunk's office. They go to a doorway and are met by a jaded blonde woman who's a right bitch. She informs nice lady that little Diego already left. Nice lady is bummed because she was supposed to take him to school or something. I don't understand what's going on here.

Snorty tells Alonso the benefit will be a great time and this time she really does smile, her face has loosened up. Jaqui escorts Alonso to the kitchen where she does an angry butt-wiggle when she sees him flirt with Lorena.

As Alonso exits through the offices Sara trips and ends up in front of him. He helps her up and she tells him she's Snorty's niece. She gets sweet and coquettish when she hears he's a doctor, then she totally checks out his very fine posterior as he exits.

Sara approaches Granny Snorty and tries to ingratiate her way into helping with the benefit. Granny says Sara's too green, she accidentally taps her computer "Ay, I erased the budget!" Sara the computer whiz jumps in and retrieves the file in record time, probably by hitting Backspace. Jaqui skitters in and tells Snorty the new menu is ready for her disapproval. Sara is told to stay behind so she plans her next brown nosing maneuver.

Zulema babbles happily to Diana that the Don Pancho gig went so well their phone is ringing off the hook. She suggests Diana recommend Ma's catering to her friend Bruno and his pals. "We're over!" cries Diana, running from the room.

Alone in her room, Diana weeps that she was a fool and she's afraid she'll be having this baby alone. Mama shows up and asks why didn't she ever talk about her relationship with Bruno? "You don't understand anything!" Diana sobs. Kids are the same the world over.

Snorty tells her Sonny (can't remember his name) that she plans to let Sara help with the gig. Sonny looks like he sees dollar signs flying out the window. He accuses her of feeling guilty. She says Sara is helping out and that's final.

Jaqui meets Dario and tells him his ex's brother's girlfriend, a simple peeler of potatoes, is working in the kitchen and will probably tell Alonso every move that Jaqui makes, hmmmph! Can they have sex now? Dario says he has a better idea and they drive off in his car.

Rosy and Lorena are in the storeroom gathering supplies. Rosy sees a suitcase hidden behind bags of chiles and shrieks "Mama, it's a bomb!" Maruja arrives and they both start shrieking, maybe they think their high pitch will disarm the bomb. Lorena quiets them by admitting it's her bag.

During the commercial they convince Lorena to come home with them. They joke around and Rosy comments that explains why Lorena was such a good employee, the first to arrive and the last to leave.

Yikes, Paula's on the warpath again, she doesn't want Betina to go out with dad. (Hey, what happened to Jaqui?) She finally agrees as long as Betina buys as much as possible.

Alonso tells Valeria about his meeting for the benefit gig. He gets kind of creepily breathless and panting and finally admits he saw Lorena there. Le pant, le heave.

Betina is cute and young and happy to have a father-daughter outing. Happy that is until Jaqui shows up and plants a wet one on Papi. "Jaqueline is my girlfriend," stupid dad says. Betina calls Jaqui a homewrecker and runs away. Jaqui comments that the spoiled brat is just like her mom. After Dario runs after Betina Jaqui mutters that she'll make sure the snot-nosed brat is out of her father's life.

Dario tries to explain to Betina that Jaqui didn't bust up their family, and by the way please don't tell mom that you met her, OK?

Sonny shows Snorty some plans that show they increased their profits by 12%. Snorty snaps at Jaqui for being late, then reams Sonny for his plan that is OK but not good enough. When she sets a goal she wants it met. Jaqui is relieved that Snorty is biting someone else's head off.

Betina spilled the beans because Paula has gone ballistic again. She screams at Betina to NOT WORRY, DON'T BE AFRAID, YOU DID RIGHT! She calls Maruja and demands her help, she won't take no for an answer.

Maruja sneaks into the office and writes something on the whiteboard.

Downstairs, Lorena and Rosy happily wash dishes and plan how to sneak the suitcase out. Maruja returns looking guilty and they wonder what's up with her.

Snorty and Jaqui return to the office and discover the violated whiteboard. Snorty reads aloud - "Jacqueline is a husband stealer. Be careful, you have next to you a fawning toady who speaks ill of you whenever she can." Jaqui wails and Snorty tells her to keep her private life to herself, now Good Night! Jaqui's tiny but evil cogs and sprockets start turning.

Maruja and the girls are leaving when Jaqui shows up and blames Lorena for writing the nasty-gram. She grabs Lorena's hair while Maruja and Rosy try to separate them. Lorena yells back that she's not a fighter but Jaqui looked for trouble and she found it. Then she hauls off and punches Jaqui right in the face.

Lorena storms out of the kitchen followed by Jaqui who can't keep up in her spiky heels and tight skirt. Rosy asks Maruja, "Was it you? Did you do it for crazy Paula?"

Lorena heads straight to the top. She blasts through Snorty's door to tell her of the grand injustice. Jaqui skitters in behind and says Lorena punched her, she's insolent. Snorty's pretty pissed at both of them but she tells Lorena to report to Personnel and pick up her final paycheck. One more word out of Jaqui and she's out too.

Lorena says she'll go but she holds her head high because she's innocent.

Miserable Maruja decides to tell the truth. She starts for the office but Lorena stops her, no sense in both of them getting fired. She tells Maruja not to cry, it could be worse, at least she's got a place to stay.

Everyone is hanging around the gate. First Julian is there to meet Rosy who is bummed because she has to postpone their first date. Next the night watchman comes to say goodbye. Then Alonso shows up and is surprised to see her suitcase, is she leaving?

Jaqui calls Dario to tell him the chisme about what the stupid peeler of potatoes wrote.

The doleful group arrives at Casa Maruja and Rosy squeals that the couch is much more comfortable than the storeroom, no? Poor Alonso seems to have this perpetually dazed look on his face - Que??? Lorena explains she's been sleeping in the kitchen. Maruja says it gets worse, Lorena just got fired for what she herself did.

Sara ingratiages herself to Granny Snorty by coming up with a good idea.

The next day Chachi or whatever his name is calls Sara to report the nuns haven't heard from Lorena.

Downstairs Snorty asks Barbara why she's up so early. Oh joy, she says, Vasco is returning. (Oh joy, another character.) Snorty says her day is illuminated by the news. Sara eavesdrops...who's Vasco?

Valeria gets the cute little girl ready for school and the jaded blonde lady shows up. OK, I get it, the blonde is Valeria's bossy mother-in-law but I still don't know who little Diego is. Mama's Boy/Valeria's husband arrives and Mama fawns all over him. OMG, this guy is an uber wimp. Is he little Diego or is there a son hiding somewhere? They have a mother/son love fest and Valeria rolls her eyes. Ha, so does the little girl.

Alonso visits Snorty to discuss something personal. It's about his girlfriend Lorena, she couldn't have written the nasty-gram because she doesn't even know his sister. He's ashamed to say it but he thinks the culprit is his sister because Jaqueline is doing her ex. (Nice decoy away from Maruja!) He asks Snorty to reconsider her decision, Lorena really needs the job. "And more education," adds Snorty, "her dismissal was not for the message but because she hit Jaqueline." Alonso is lethargically impactado.


Enamoradizo/a = Person who falls in love easily
Ir con la frente muy alta = To hold your head high (Lit. to go with the front high)
Pan de dios = An absolute angel (Lit. bread of God)
Pelapappas = Peeler of potatoes
Taco de ojo = Eye candy (Lit. eye taco)

Labels: enemiga