Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Fuego 10/7 Tues, # 113, How Does La Llorona Get Her Groove Back? Ask Mama Who Has Certainly Found Hers




With a tip of the sombrero to Terry McMillan, I am still in a state of euphoria over my splendid trip to northern Spain and still grateful to Bridget for producing three fine recaps to keep this FELS nightmare, I mean telenovela, sailing along on the CarayCaray waves of delighted viewers. But on with tonight's action: Who is that handsome man on the white horse willing to pay whatever to graze his horses on the hacienda pastures just when the KingKidz need some ready cash? How convenient, as Dana Carvey used to say in his ChurchLady snidely way. And why is Verizon's La Llorona more attractively dressed than the FELS tear making machine, Sofia? But I digress into the mysteries of the universe.

Uncle Alejandro swears he will seek revenge himself is Feo is lying about the missing baby. But he is still saying it behind bars.
Feo plans his empire of a well run hacienda all under his absolute control, [why hasn't it worked yet if he has such talents?] Let's get to the hacienda and tell everyone of our wedding. No, the horny one wants to continue to boogie in the bed, Feo swears his only motive is her tranquility and health.

Sofia is slow but Jimena seems nearly comatose as she blinks at the news that Oscar has returned. Not even the Llorona can move her with the news that Oscar returned but without Juan and without my daughter. I won't be conquered, I am going out to look for my daughter. The dark forest would be a good place to start, lets wait until dark.

Damian has the luck to meet Quintina on the road with her wagon bed and horse while he is on his horse. Her confidence has been abused, she flirts outrageously. Damian promises to defend her against whatever.

Sarita comes in to ask what's the progress with Sister Sludge, aja Jimena. Sofia assures Sarita needs to regain her desire to love. Sarita sneers back that she has never lost her love.

Sofia has worked out that it is really their papa's fault, if he hadn't defrauded Libia, then she wouldn't have died, the Reyes wouldn't have come to seek revenge, the sister's wouldn't have fallen for these bricklaying, breadbaking hotties, the baby wouldn't have been stolen..... Let's go walk in the dark.

Damian is questioning Q about the lovely woman in the fog who he wants to meet (nooooooooo, Damian) Q tells him he has run into La Llorona, no kidding.

We get a bucket of tears in the girls bedroom to illustrate the truth of this naming. Sarita confesses that she can't forget her love for Franco. On the other side of town, Eva has to listen to Ros echo the same I'll never forget my love for Franco. Eva advises her to love someone else? Someone will surely come along.

Franco and Oscar work in the new bakery, oh I guess this is the kitchen of the hacienda, and discuss the disappearance of Juan. He's not dead, he's dead, he's not dead....

Damian offers a sherry (jerez) to a man I don't know who seems concerned for Damian's well being...... He says he has the feeling that here he will encounter the peace that has escaped him so far (don't put money on it honey)

Oscar appears in sombrero in the bedroom of sleeping locobeauty. It hurts him to see her so and he feels he is to blame. Here is a rose of crystal just like I gave you before. I can't stop thinking about you I have to get over it, If you still don't want to see me, I only want that you get well, that you return to the happy smiling girl you were. [I agree she's the only one with a relatively sunny disposition. Perhaps she was the one left on the hacienda steps in a basket]
******************
Franco has turned into a really productive guy. Ros comes to see him because she has been thinking so much about him and his suffering and she comes to offer her friendship. He needs a real friend just now who will listen to him about his love and suffering and his true love which he has lost. She had something else in mind from the look on her face.

Abuelo has the inside track on the honey moon pleasures of Feo and Gabi while Sarita and Sofia seems genuinely surprised. The pretty maid Natalia comes for Jimena's dinner which she takes up to the bedroom and surprises Oscar who is still kneeling at Jimena's side. Oscar begs her not to sound the alarm that he is there. Natalia says she won't say anything about him. He kisses the comatose one and gives her a blessing while Natalia looks on sweetly.

Sofia snuffles over some baby sweater and decides she will go out into the dry ice forest once again looking for her lost baby.

Oscar returns to the luxury digs with Franco looking really comfortable in this new found hacienda living. Sofia breaks in to claim they are hiding Juan and her daughter.

Speaking of the occult, Juan strolls with the Doctora in the woods when he suddenly hears a woman screaming, Juan. The look on his face is straight out horrified as a thought painfully pierces his brain, that name sounds familiar, or a woman screaming at me sounds familiar. Perhaps both?
******************
Doctora tries to stroke him as a Mom and her truculent son come out of the bush and we know which Juan is being sought. But Juan still sounds so familiar says the big J to his companion.

Sofia playing La Llorona to the hilt accuses F and O of hiding Juan and begins a search of the new rooms. The hacienda is so much bigger than the bakery of old that it takes some time. She looks really suspicious at the pantry then strokes the raw bread buns provocatively then angers, then saddens, then cries, lots, Franco and Oscar watch her come back and don't seem surprised that she can't find Juan here. They try to comfort her as she can't stop crying.

The Doctora continues walking with Juan who still has no shirt or shoes as she looks for an opening to jump him. The Evil medicine man is warned that Juan's good works are going to spoil these villagers and they won't like being beaten so much. Is it the same or another shaman that chants Nahuatl words, but the brujo scene is offset while the doctora and Juan discuss the good that the vaccines will do for the poor villagers. Suddenly a woman begins to give birth and Juan wants to get Silvester. Not flustered at all the Doctora calmly prepares to assist the woman giving birth and Juan turns into an instant birthing coach telling her when to push and when to breath. The miracle of birth and a perfect baby in seconds amazes Juan as it does the viewer. Juan begins to withdraw but they push the baby into his arms, Doctora acting like it might serve as a stimulating sex toy, no that can't be it.

Sofia hugs the sweater and cries for her baby. Juan hugs the baby who cries, the real mother begins to say my daughter, my daughter, echoed by Sofia while Juan has some kind of memory or second sight of Sofia in her drab black, snotting on the white baby sweater. [Egad, I hate this stolen baby plot devices, they really upset me and I know that JudyB doesn't hold truck with them either. Especially since we know that Feo let little Luisito live in a cardboard box with a crazy drunk woman who didn't appear to feed him well, what could he be subjecting a helpless newborn to? They could at least show us that she is okay.]
********************
The honeymooners return in a euphoric breathlessness to a pouting Sofia and Sarita who sure haven't been getting any good nookie like Mom has, and Abuelo says he is not surprised considering the ambition of Gabi's new husband. Gabi announces the wedding and the inevitable news that Feo is now lord and master of the entire hacienda.

In the market Eladio speaks for the family giving excellent news that Rigo is getting better. the former friends of Gabi who flirt with him until Natalia shows up and he passes the ladies over to greet the his gift from God. She tells that Gabi returned and has married Feo. Now he is the master of the entire hacienda. She promises Eladio she won't keep any secrets back from him.

Mom with her special mom touch drops the limp hand of Jimena coldly letting it thump lifelessly onto the bed, what a bother, then criticizes the crystal rose which she assumes Sarita has brought in and demands Jimena, Jimena. When Mom leaves, the sombrero shadow on the wall tell us all is seen by an adoring Oscar. He gives her kisses and words of his constancy to love her back to life.
**********************
Franco has the plow and the oxen team under good control. Q arrives with her horse and wagon bed barely under control. But Q comes bearing a five course lunch while they discuss that the missing Oscar has gone to see the comatose Jimena. Q has big plans for their money making scenarios, Franco says sometimes she worries him.

Abuelo and Pablito make a brief appearance about nothing important.

Gabi looks at Juan Jose Robles photo and remembers how handsome he was she dreamily says he was her first and only love. She remembers telling Franco how much his father loved her only and not his mother. She then at least tells herself it was all a lie. But Feo loves her and she chants his name in a sexual swoon.

Meantime Feo gets a nightly chance to menace as he shows Oscar divorce papers that Jimena supposedly signed and demands that he act with pride and sign them too. Oscar doesn't want to believe it but why does he sign anyway. Was that a universal macho challenge or what?

Next: Sofia gets to act out her La Llorona role in the dryicy dark of night. Let's see more horses, huh? Damian is apparently going to pursue LL and show us some really nice horses so I guess we get both.

WORD OF THE NIGHT: Jerez = sherry. Also the town of Jerez in southern Spain where the most prestigious sherry is distilled and aged to perfection in oak barrels.

Labels:


Comments:
I'm surprised this didn't send you screaming back to Spain, Cheryl, but you didn't miss a beat despite your time away. :-)
 

Thanks Julie, I appreciate your kind concern. Actually I do wish I was back in Spain.
 

Oh Snap, Oh Snark...Great recap. Is this just not the best?..this is so great cause as you watch, you get to laugh out loud at what normally would only be considered funny by a complete sociopath or thirteen year old stoners. Since it is only my husband and I, I get to use phases that would make the porn jefe blush (yeah shout-out to HBO, you all have helped me hone my skills, with all due respect).

Did you ever think you'd watch a poor mother suffering the kidnapping of her spawn, and you'd be saying STFU, a poor girl who lies comatose, for some strange undisclosed reason, and you'd ROTFLYAO when the maid said she was taking the dinner. Hello she can chew? Yes we have wondered about bedsores and adult diapers.
 

A question...if Grabi says that the Juan Robles was her ONLY love, does that mean she doesn't love Fernando?

I think the Mi Hija has reached the l00 mark. Adela doesn't have to worry about learning lines. When in doubt, all she has to say is "mi hija." Enough already!!!!!

Thanks for the good recap Cheryl.
 

wow, just sat down to check the last postings from yesterday', and Cherly already has tonight's done. I read it before watching, that's different....here we go...
 

Hey Beckster, I do wince at the irony of feeling so mean about such tragedy but they aren't helping us find our warm caring sides are they? Thanks for pointing out the lunacy of the dinner tray, now that I recall it had red coolaid and Natalia didn't stay to feed her or keep her from choking on the drink in a big glass.

Anon at 12:06, my guess is that Gabi is just lost in lust and probably never loved
anyone. She must have wanted Juan Sr. because she couldn't have him. The contrast of the doing without sisters with doing it often Mama is pretty funny at least.

Hi DDave, I think 3 weeks of total immersion has made this recapping easier and faster, but then maybe it is just that many of the characters just utter one or two phrases over and over and over.
 

Thanks for the great recap, Cheryl.
I was wrong in thinking it was Slofia yelling for Juan in yesterday's preview. I fell for it. But if Slofia wants her baby back, can't she make an attempt to look for it using the SUV rather than walking about the Rape Forest in the middle of the night. No one else seems to be looking for the baby. I wonder how long we have to wait before Juan regains his memory. Things need to be speeded up. G in CA
 

Cheryl, back in the saddle! Has anyone told you how well Bridget took care of us while you were gone? She was terrif. :) Thanks for the snark, and the beautiful white horses, Cher. Love to Willa.

I agree the powers that be could at least let us know Baby MG is okay. It's bad enough we have to suffer through yet another stolen baby plot, as if they simply couldn't come up with something else. I am sick of Mommy/Baby abuse. Seeing Big Juan gently holding that teeny, tiny baby just made me sadder, because his baby shouldn't be missing. It sure as FUEGO shouldn't have had a gun to its head and dangled over a waterfall. Argh.

Quintina and Damian, however, made me laugh. She is such a hoot and a bit of lightness in this depressing, fog-ridden story.

Sure, wanting to get next to some weird chick you happened to glimpse in a dry ice fog is perfectly normal, Damian honey. NOT.

It's cool being in a better kitchen (at Hacienda R-R) and seeing the oven actually hot and flaming.

You would think having all the sex she wanted would make Crabzilla a tab more laid back (pun intended). But noooooooooooooo.

Someone mentioned (was it you, Julie?) how much bigger Juan was than all the villagers and that they simply didn't have any shirts his size. You are so right. Juan towers over those people.

Oscar signed the divorce papers! Thank you! Praise FUEGO! *breaking out the bubbly*

We just HAD to see Croc Shaman's lame loincloth one more time. Ugh. Why don't you shake your magic herbs over that nasty thing and make it FIT YOU. That would be a start. (And while you're at it, unshrivel Shriveled Porn Dude. Aren't you two friends?)

...the doing without sisters with doing it often Mama... Try saying that fast ten times, Cheryl. ROFL

Yeah--how come only the bad guys can drive cars in this 'burg?

Looks like Juan is going to find a shirt tomorrow. Darn. Double-darn. Well, it was good while it lasted. :D
 

Cheryl: Welcome back. You have great snarkability.

I'm hoping Oscar wrote "Go to Hell" on the divorce papers, but, that unfortunately is not the case. Oscar also missed an opportunity to launch a left hook at Feonando when he got in his face. I'm hoping Oscar was suffering from a temporary moment of insanity brought on by grief and his long trip.

Of course, if the three sisters are all divorced, then they can have a triple wedding later. Just saying.
 

Dear Cheryl, welcome back to The Twilight Zone and thanks for the excellent recap . Isn't it ironic that the only people getting any action in this novela are the two baddies. Crabby is going to wear out Ferd's batteries. She should be more careful with her boytoy. And, do Sofia and Jimena still get their regular paychecks even though one just says the same things over and over and over and the other lies in bed looking spaced out ????...I could do that. Will Sofia be dancing with a Star soon and dragging the unsuspecting Damien through the woods at night on her futile mission ???? Sofia, have you ever considered looking for the baby DURING THE DAYLIGHT HOURS. I guess Juan does not subscribe to the advice from that song ''If you can't be with the one you love [or in Juan's case, can't remember] , love the one you're with.'' Maybe Hot Doc and Crabby could share Ferd's talents.
 

Welcome back, Comadre Cheryl! I wish we were all in Spain right now! Great recap as usual, with lots of laughs. I'm enjoying the fun recaps/comments, and glad I'm watching Dona Barbara.

It's the old stolen baby storyline again - yuk.

The llorona commercial has a better llorona...
jb
 

Hi Cheryl. Thanks for the recap. It's good to have you back. Creepy porn dude seemed really creepy last night. Yuck. And the witch doctor that is just stupid. Every time Snofia came on I put it on mute. I'm pretty darn sick of her.
 

Thank you for the recap. I do admit that the scenes where the distraught Sofia holds the baby clothing are touching. But yep. as soon as she opens her mouth I get mean. I had a terrific dog once who would snap at our other little dog if he got too yelpy.I think she was telling him "Shut Up".Again , I can't help but think how useful a phone would be and how much the shaman looks like a shady character from some old Starsky and Hutch show. mhm
 

Welcome back, Cheryl, forgot to say that in the quick blog I posted last night. I think that I could use a few weeks in total imersion myself...I was thinking the same about what Oscar should have been writing instead of his signature. I was thinking "FU". And he should have thrown Feo off the property, too. His refusal to sign would have pre-empted the trippple wedding that we know is coming at the end...I'm wondering when they are goingto allow us a peek at Slofia/Juan spawn, to let us know that she is available for future episodes. I am so tired of these lame "searches for Juan and bebe in the dark, in the rape forest, in the immediate area...The plodding plot and repetitiveness is getting so tiresome- let's get the trainwreck moving again!
 

Thanks for the recap Cheryl. I had to miss last night and your recap was so good I could easily imagine the scenes. I did mentally fast forward during the mi hijita scenes. Did your travels take you to Gallicia? I meant to ask my daughter in law this past weekend if there is a Gallego version of llorona - maybe you know. I got caught up in grandson's footbal (soccer) game and my attention was focused on my promise not to yell out gooooooal at his games. I also find the baby stealing plot line disturbing. However, I think it will be a while before baby shows up. From my limited experience, having the baby die would be culturally too dark a path. Do many of the novellas have a stolen baby plot line? If so, I wonder if it is a rsult of transplanted (way back) European stories of babies sold to gypsies and the like used to frighten young children into obedience. Some 'fairy tales' can be quite dark.

Abuelo P
 

Thanks for all the welcome. Willa thanks you too. I think this community has been distilled to the diehards per usual with these lengthy TN plots. Which is fine since it gives us survivors a chance to hone our snark to a lethal sharpness.

After time away from Mexidoon I feel like my disbelief isn't so suspended, but still there is fun to be had here. The perfect bread in shapes only city tools could make coming out of the jungle bakery but looking like it was picked up in Puebla and driven out to the site made me laugh but if it helps Juan remember who he is so he can go back to the tearful one. sheesh!
 

Abuelo, thanks for your kind words. I find the following site full of references to La Llorona, Medea, Niobe and other women who have lost or destroyed their children. La Llorona seems to be located here in the Hispanic new world, especially Mexico and the southwest US. But check this site out:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Llorona

Yes, I was in Galicia, we stayed just outside of Santiago de Compostela where all the pilgrims congregate at the end of their trek from France (or perhaps some jumped out of BMW's and made the last few meters on foot.) We drove from Barcelona heading northwest through the edge of Basque territory to Cantabria, Asturias and to Gallicia. After we continued on south through Castilla y Leon and only as far south as the La Mancha area before returning to Madrid. By the way, the roads were smooth, well signed, and not very full until we tried the insane return to Madrid on a Friday afternoon in the height of traffic. Even so, the Spaniards are not as sociopathic in driving as parts of the US are.
 

Doesn't matter if Oscar signed the divorce papers because Jimena didn't. Oh sure, there's a signature there, but it's in Gabi's handwriting. Everyone knows Jimena couldn't sign doodely-squat, plus Naty's a witness and she's already told Eladio and who knows who else.

So we're cool.

Even if she did, it was only a civil wedding, which means they can still have that five-way wedding in church regardless. You know the wedding I mean. Juan & Leonora, Sofi & Damian, Oscar & Jimena, Franco & Rosario, Pedro & Sarita.

Okay so that's probably not how it will hash out, but it's my Maximum Happiness/Plausibility Scenario.
 

Abuelo, babies frequently get either stolen or swapped in telenovelas and US soaps. I can't think of a single case that didn't have a happy outcome... eventually. Even adopted kids inevitably find their way back to their parents. :)

The tension is much more bearable if you concentrate not on the baby's safety, which is virtually guaranteed (it's always good for blackmail and/or extortion), but on how the subplot will be resolved.
 

Cheryl: welcome back to the Land That Time (& Sense) Forgot! Thanks for the snark, humor & intelligence, all lacking in our dearly beloved FELs. Instead we get fog, sobs, hair, and conflicting themes of sex & death. Yeesh...why do we watch?? (like moths to flame)

I do think the producers/writers have truly done a hatchet job--no one can sympathize with the characters we're supposed to feel sorry for. Seriously, if we all want Slofia/DOHfia/Sufria to shut up, what does that say about the team behind the camera? If this was done well, we'd all be weeping along with her but the endless replay of "meeeeee haaaaaaa" is just plain annoying.

And as for I-Juan-A-Brain, they've reduced a fine hunk o'man to blathering idiot. Poor Rosario is nothing more than a pair of over-inflated bazooms who seems to be part of this motley crew just to titillate the male viewers (along with Hawt-But-Morally-Conflicted Doctora.

My, didn't I take my b!tch vitamin this morning!

Can we write a collective letter to the production staff & tell them to FUEGO off??

Fuego Maggie (who needs a new name, now that we know what the "F" stands for)

How about Maggarita? Yeah, that works...it's noon somewhere, right?
;-)
 

Julie- thanks for the reassuring info on baby stealing and swapping. Cheryl-thanks for the llorna link. Here is a link to the PBS series Spain - On the Road Again.http://www.spainontheroadagain.com/. This may help Spain -related withdrawl symptoms. Those interested in a diversion from Fuego silliness might also want to check it out. However, it does feature Willy Nelson singing his signature song (not en Espanol). It also features Gwyneth Paltro who, I am told, speaks fairly good Spanish, some morbidly obese chef,a lot of people eating and mmmming on how good everything tastes and shots from inside the car they are riding in and not a lot of the countryside. Still if you can record and fast forward during the card rides and eating you do see some of the sights.The latest episode was filmed in Galicia (Galithia) and the website has a recipe for caldo Gallego and a discussion of queimada, the very potent Galician punch that is (I am told) a feature of beach parties.

Abuelo P
 

I agree that Jimena's not exactly earning her paycheck these days. And the producers have even extended the cost-cutting by not giving her eye make-up! I know, it wouldn't be realistic to have her all made up in her zombie state, but when has this show been realistic?
 

Yay! Cheryl, welcome back. You were really fast, I was surpirsed it was posted before airing on the west.

Okay, so Quintina's hat looked like it was lined with foil! I was LMAO!

What a lucky baby getting to be held by that big man. I have to say I loved watching EY holding the baby, very sweet. Even if it is swirling in the mass of stupidity.

Why didn't Oscar just go get Jimena and bring her home. They aren't divorced, he should have just removed her from hell house! And why didn't he lay some smack down on Feo? Jeez!

And Oscar and Franco trying to calm Sophia down and being very kind when all she is doing is screaming about how their brother stole her baby. Doormats!

Something in this story has got to move NOW!
 

How come everyone is so concerned with getting people to actually sign papers, which are never witnessed by a notary or have any other proof of authenticity? Why haven't Gabi and Fer figured out that they could just forge all those sigs and no one would know the diff or believe anyone who said they weren't real?
 

Renee, quick save yourself! Stop trying for logic, you'll make your head explode!
 

Molly, I think she needs a beanie! Only 19.95 and that includes the foil liner and an additional $5.99 for the interchangeable propellers. :-}
 

Well, Abuelo P... telenovela-wise, I started with RUBI (so far, the best), then came DUELO DE PASIONES (so far the absolute worst), then PASION, and now FUEGO. The last three in a row have had stolen babies/kidnapped kids. *insert expletive of your choice here*

I have jumped on the Julie Train concerning the five-way wedding. YES, if only.

The baby-swapping on U.S. soaps seems to have died down quite a bit. And I am thankful.

Maggarita it is! :)

Molly, Quintina has been wearing her foil-lined hat since Llorona showed up LOL! "I may be comic relief, but I refuse to become one of The Walking Stupid of Serdan. Must keep brain from the deadly rays..." Heh.
 

Butter Biscuit Stephe, it sounds like you need a beanie also.
 

Cheryl - welcome back and thanks for the recap. I have nothing to add that hasn't already been well said here. Yet another night of Telerisa lunacy...

Who is the 'guapeton'? Damian? He is a hunk. I wonder what their role in this story is....?

Watching Franco plow that soil made me droool. NOT for Franco, but due to how rich and black that soil is. OOoohhhhh! This awful Tennessee clay is the pits. I'm having heart palpitations for the rich soil in Mexidoon.

doris
 

Thanks for the reality check, Molly! Maybe I should wear a foil-lined hat while watching Fuego!
 

oops, I just saw the beanie suggestion - now I know what those are for!
 

Cheryl, welcome back and thanks for the recap! I actually stayed awake for most of last night's episode.
Are we all appropriately grateful that we haven't seen Porn Dude flapping his buns in a loincloth?
But seriously, the plot is draggin' badly, and we will not be bought off by a few cheap shots of almost-naked Juan swimming!
\\:o}
"Creemelo"
 

Doris, it is really sad when dirt has become more exciting then the actors.

Renee, I don't use foil. I get it all out by telling my children the whole story as though it was rational and made sense and I just watch them squirm.

Bwahahahahahahahahaha
 

Thanks and welcome back cheryl. Enjoyed your "better than episode recap". Can't figure out your reference to Terry MacMillan. I've read all of her books. She a fav. Please enlighten me.
Dot
 

Terry McMillan's book is "How Stella Got Her Groove Back"
 

And I just noticed that Calamity Cakes used the Got Her Groove Back referring also to Sofia while I was in Spain. Sorry Cakes, I didn't check to make sure the title hadn't been used recently. Oh great minds think alike, huh?
 

Who is this guapeton, Damien? Are you nuts, Sofia? GO GET HIM, girl!
 

Oooooooh! Thought he looked familiar..Take a look!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnfvBQpLwjc
 

Cara, thanks for the Cristian moments, what a doll. Sofia is an imbecile but you knew that.
 

Cheryl: great rif on the raff in this episodio. No hay problema! Just considered that a great title and a continuation with a different nuance. Glad to see you back in the saddle with Capricho, so to speak....
 

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