Caray, Caray!

There’s gonna be a party (and nobody is gonna party hardier than me that Juan and Sofia are only 7 weeks away from gettin’ married and living happily ever after). Juan is dressed in his best charro get-up and in the kitchen of the Double R (Hacienda de los Robles-Reyes) giving a last bit of thanks to the virgencita before the big shin dig starts--but nothin’ ever goes without a hitch for this guy. Root pops up there like the gopher in Caddy-shack and surprises him at the last second. She oohs and ahhs over how fine he looks tonight. Root says she is there because she just had to come by to give him a big thank you for saving Gabi’s life earlier that day. Juan’s suspicious. What’s the big deal and what’s Gabi to her, anyway? He’ll find out later she says, and then she grabs onto him and plants a big one smack dab on the kisser just as Jimena enters the doorway. Juan is supposedly trying to fight Ruth off him (at least I think he is) but Jimena only sticks around for a couple of seconds. She of course assumes the worst: that Juan is two-timing Sofia with Root. (¡Qué horror!) Jimena runs off before Juan can get himself loose from Root’s clutches and kick her out of the house.

Jimena goes in to see Oscar. He’s lost in self pity. She tells him she’s had enough. She can’t take it anymore. He’s too bitter. He’s given up on himself. So, it’s adios.

Across the way at the Double E (Hacienda de las Elizondo y del Escandon) Sofia warns Darth Rico that he should probably consider re-accessorizing his wardrobe, cuz when Juan sees him with that belt buckle on, nobody knows what he might do to him then. Darth shrugs her off and starts up the stairs for Gabi’s room. All of a sudden he turns around and asks Sofia if she knows how his belt happened to end up in her house. Sofia says no. Darth says it was always in his bedroom and nobody else was allowed to enter that room without asking Raqui’s permission first. This is too much information for Sofia. She says then he might want to ask his wife. She could tell him who else was in his room. Suddenly Darth gets it and thinks to himself, “Of course! Fernando Escandon!”

Speaking of said illicit intruder, Feo is busy killing two birds with one stone by faking his concern for Gabi’s safety and adeptly as ever, throwing suspicion off himself. He asks aloud if the accident wasn’t caused on purpose. Gabi says DV thought someone was trying to kill her. Feo suggests it could have been Darth Rico himself who tried it. Gabi changes the subject and wants to know why he and Darth hate each other so much. He shrugs it off and says it’s a very old story. She wants him to tell it anyway. He tries to play it cool by pretending to read a book (which might be more believable if it weren’t a Bible). Gabi’s eyes sparkle at the thought of him possibly being jealous of Darth but Feo says he’s not in the least (and for once he's not lying. He better drop hold of that Bible and fast.) He says he’ll tell her the story some day, but for now he’s only worrying about her. (How worried can he look with his face stuck in that book?) He is still cool as a cuke and in an attempt to plant a seed of doubt over Root he asks if, by the by, she’s told anyone who she has made her heir. Could there be anybody who might benefit from her death? He slams the Bible shut.

In town, back at the church just then, Padre Tadeo can’t help thinking about Fernando’s multiple murder confessions: Bernie, Libia, Rosario, Armando, Dr. Gomez. Pad Tad says to himself that Juan is right, and that Juan must get Sofia and the little girls out of that house because Eeee-vil has taken it over.

A bit later Darth runs into Feo leaving the hacienda. Darth immediately accuses him of sleeping with his wife. Fer denies it and says he’s got no proof, and so what. “What are you going to do? Ask your wife?” “—You know she ran off!” “—Ran off? From who or what? You? Perhaps she wasn’t quite so happy living with you?” “—That’s none of your affair.” Feo says he’s right about that and he could care less. What does concern him is that Darth Rico is the reason his family was ruined. Rico snickers and taunts back that it wasn’t his fault if Feo’s daddy was so naïve. Fer threatens to get even with him sooner or later. DV says he’ll be waiting for him, but it also might be good for Feo to know that he wasn’t in it alone. Fer is steamed impactado and grabs him by the collar. “You had an accomplice? Who was it?” Darth laughs in his face. “That’s right, Fernando! I didn’t act alone!” He saunters away and leaves Fer to fret.

At Casa Coyote, meanwhile, Soledad feels Raqui’s features and says she can tell Raqui has suffered a great deal. Raqui says it’s especially bad when you know you’ve caused harm to the innocent. Soledad tells her that Raqui’s pain and remorse will allow her to find peace eventually. Raqui wonders how Soledad can know so much about her. Soledad explains that over the years her blindness has given her sight beyond that of the physical world. She accepted her affliction and found peace once she realized that at times passion can overtake the soul and the heart and cause others to lose their heads over foolish things. Soledad turns the subject to her son and asks Raqui to help prevent him from carrying out his plans for vengeance. He trusts Raqui and would listen to her. Raqui promises to at least try, but first, she’d really like to know what his name is. Soledad says it’s Ricardo, Ricardo Uribe, like his father’s. Raqui is no longer a happy dimwit camper after this revelation. She is sour-puss impactada.

Juan brings Franco’s group of mariachis into the entry hall at the Double E and they begin to serenade Sofia. Crabi tries to run him off but he tells her to stuff it. He is part owner of the place and can do what he darn well pleases. ¿Qué no? ¡Qué sí! Juan proposes to Sofia and (let’s all give thanks to the virgencita) she accepts. Root pouts upstairs in her bedroom and swears she’s going to separate those two if it’s the last thing she ever does. Downstairs everybody races over to the Double R for the engagement fiesta where there’s plenty of traditional food and fun for everyone. Of course, once they’re gone the sad-sacks –Fer, Root and Crabi- stand around and kvetch about the vulgar low-lives Sofia and the rest of Gabi’s girls are lowering themselves to associate with.

At the same time, Jimena is about to leave the hacienda for good. Oscar rolls out of his room and begs her to stay. She tells him that she’s tired of his empty promises and of all the humiliation and insults she’s had to put up with since coming back to him. She wanted so badly to help him but he’s impossible to live with. Her love wasn’t enough --And no, she won’t be going back to Mama. She’ll stay atTrinkets R Us till she finds some place new to settle into. (The novela gods apparently waved their magic pens and wrote a cot into the storeroom at the last second I guess, and besides the place can always use another door mat. ¿Qué no? ) Oscar begs again and Jimena says there’s no reason to stay since he won’t do his part to overcome what’s happened to him. Until he has a change of attitude and proves to himself that he’s willing and ready to do what it takes she’s not interested. If he can get over whatever it is that’s caused him to give up then maybe she’ll come back but not until then. It’s too painful. She walks out and shuts the door in his face.

Meanwhile, Nabor visits Fermin in jail and takes him a few goodies. Nabor convinces him that he shouldn’t be wasting his life away paying for somebody else’s crimes and so Fermin admits finally that it was Fernando Escandon who actually killed Mapache.

The partying starts at the Double R and it’s going full throttle. Rigo and Eugenia do a little hat dance. The Gossip Sisters are drunk and chasing Nabor around the room. Franco steals kisses with Sarita and takes her for a twirl. Sofia and Juan are in permanent lip-lock mode. Even Pablito is groovin' and movin'. Oscar though, stays in his room and mopes. Pablito brings him in a tray of food from the party but he just growls at the kid. As Pablito turns to leave Oscar calls him back and tells him he’s sorry. They share a sorrowful hug. A while later Oscar comes out and is dressed in his best charro get-up too and joins the party. They all cheer to see him there and Sofia asks where Jimena is. Oscar has to tell everyone that she’s left him.

Back at Trinkets R Us, Jimena pulls out her red heart-shaped pillow and hugs it close while thinking about how much she loves Oscar. (Ok, ok. I give. So how did she fit that big fat pillow into that tiny little suitcase? And how did she get an entire wardrobe in there to boot?) She tells herself that she loves him, but if he doesn’t change she’s resigned to losing him and walking away for good.

Over at the Double E, Root is in bed, restless as all get out. She can’t sleep because she keeps thinking about making mad passionate love to Juan. Finally she sits up, frustrated with herself, and swears she’ll get him away from Sofia somehow. She turns on the light and is surprised to see Feo standing there. The ghoul was watching her in the dark and now he razzes her about being so upset over Juan and Sofia getting married that she can’t get to sleep. Root tries to kick him out and threatens to scream so that Gabi will find out. He calls her bluff. Go ahead and yell, he says. They can both try playing with fire and see which of them actually gets burned first. Maybe she really wants him for the night, he asks. (Well, we all know he's a sick sadistic squirrely egomaniac, so now maybe a masochist too?) Root teases Fer with sexy slobbers then says there won’t be any fooling around between the two of them anymore, out of respect for Gabi. He wonders where this is coming from and says it’s like she owes Gabi something -- as if she was her mother or something, but Root doesn’t take the bait. She tells him to get the heck out of her room instead. “Just scram! Beat it already!” Fer sees she’s serious and stomps off in disgust.

Juan and Sofia eventually take Oscar over to the shop to try to talk Jimena into returning to the hacienda. He begs her to forgive him and to come back. At least tell him she still loves him. He knows he really does need her there to help him. She says she loves him and she forgives him but, for the good of their relationship, she won’t be coming back. She doesn’t believe in him or his promises any longer.

Root, meanwhile, is back to dreaming about Juan and this time she dreams that Juan was proposing to her instead of Sofia. Then it’s back to dreaming about his making mad passionate love to her again. (Yes, the youtube version of "makin' biscuits” is uncut and much racier, not to mention it’s all on the bread-table in the kitchen!) She can’t take it anymore and starts pacing the room. She screams at herself and wonders why she can’t get him out of her head. “He’s become my obsession, my torture, my torment! Arggghhh! Juan has to be mine! --Ayyyy! I’m going to go crazy!” (Good! We all know it couldn’t happen to a nicer person.)