Caray, Caray!

In my time zone, Tontas’ start time was moved for a presidential speech. Just in case you missed recording it because of a time shift, you can see tonight’s episode on YouTube at that link. It’s called Cap 45 because US and Mexican numbering don’t match.

In his office, Raul apologizes and agrees not to interfere with Candy’s personal life. He begs her to return to writing the column. She will accept his apology if he keeps his nose out of her personal life. “Fine,” he agrees, “and how about if you and I get married, huh?” Candy asks if he knows a good divorce lawyer instead. I’m wondering, why does she need a divorce? She was married for, what, two hours? It seems like an annulment would be a slam-dunk.

We knew it was coming. Now that Candy is alive, where does that leave Alicia? She tries every way she can think of to keep Pat. We might hear these points countless times in coming months, so here is the list. I think I’ll refer to them by item number.
Alicia’s pleas.
A1. Alicia begs Pat to forget about Candy in the name of their marriage.
A2. Alicia doesn’t want to hear his rejection because it hurts so much. But Pat’s on a roll and if he is going to talk this out with Alicia, now is the time to get it all said. Besides, he wants to give all the reasons so Paula can include one all-encompassing list in her recap.
A3. Alicia loves him desperately and she’s given herself to him completely.
A4. Alicia was there for him when Candy destroyed his life. She conveniently avoids the fact that it was she who instigated that crisis.
A5. They plan to have a baby together, but he says that plan has changed.
A6. Alicia gets down on her knees and begs him to stay. And begs and begs.

Pat’s answers.
P1. He doesn’t love Alicia, and she has always known that. Candy is the only one he ever loved.
P2. Pat can’t get Candy out of his head, and he never will.
P3. Pat says our relationship died long ago; it’s time to bury it.

Pat informs her that he’ll be sleeping in another room starting tonight. As he goes upstairs and Alicia breaks down, she fixes on one thought. The one thought that began the journey to her destruction when she fixated on it eight years ago. I hate you, Candy. I hate you.

In the restaurant, Sven and Ole are singing “Volver, Volver,” which is not only a Vicente Fernandez song, but also a Jaime Camil Short Short film. Ole is so flat that Sven tells him “higher,” so Ole stands on a chair. Meño brings in Charly and Lucía, and Charly thanks Santiago for help in the ‘recent unpleasantness.’

Santiago is agitated because Candy was alone with Pat. Candy reminds him that he’s getting married. He says he just needs her friendship and support because Paulina is coming back to Mexico. Considering how much Santiago supported Candy in her most frightening crisis, of course she offers him all the friendship, comfort, and support he needs. And if you believe that, I’ve got a bridge for sale. Instead, Candy snottily asks if he’s still in love with Paulina. Santiago turns it back on her. “The question is, are you still in love with Pat?” She doesn’t have an answer for that. As for the support Santiago needs, obviously Candy believes that support is only a one-way road, and all roads lead to Miss Center of the Universe.

At the institute, Ceci tells Candy that she’s gay and loves Candy, but then is called out of her fantasy. Back in reality, Candy asks Ceci if she is gay as Meño supposes. Ceci denies it.

Marissa shows Rocío a book of animal babies and points out that mamas always take care of their babies (hmm, don’t some hens attack another hen‘s chicks?). Roc asks whether she can have two mamas, and Mar tells her no. But no worries. Paulina gave birth to her but Marissa didn’t abandon her, making it obvious, at least to a seven-year-old, who the better choice is. Marissa also takes the opportunity to compare herself to the pretty chick in the animal babies book, and she compares Paulina to the ugly frog.

On Thursday’s recap, I listed all the burdens Santiago carries. In tonight’s show they continue to weigh him down, and a few more get piled on top. He is struggling because Paulina is coming (Burden #B-9), and he’s trying to decide what to do. He can’t keep her away because she is, after all, Rocío’s mama (Burden #B-2). His angst is interrupted by a call from Pat (#B-8). “If you kiss my wife (#B-5) again, you’ll have me to answer to.” Santi asks whether this is a lesson in jealousy, or Pat wants to push him around, or what? Pat admits that he’s lost and confused, he’s getting separated, and he just needs a friend to talk to. But one who doesn’t kiss his wife. Santi hangs up on him.

Santiago returns to talking to his therapist (Donato) about Paulina. He starts, “I’m so troubled..” but changes his tune. “No! I’m not troubled at all! I’m a manly man. We just won’t let her in the house! Punto!” As he leaves, Donato comments, “Your neuroses are proceeding nicely, Señor.”

Pat catches Santiago in the stairwell and invites him to a night of strip poker (póker de prendas) with three young ladies. Santiago agrees that they shouldn’t cancel and break the ladies’ hearts. Yes, he’ll attend. They go off together like a couple of 12-year-old boys who just discovered their dad’s stash of Playboy. They don’t realize Candy has been listening. I found this scene totally implausible. Santiago desires no one but Candy (remember his patient Raquel with the boxer boyfriend?). Why would he agree to be set up? Even Pat just broke up with Alicia and Soledad because Candy is back. I’ll accept that Pat might go for it. But not Santi. Ni modo. Willing suspension of disbelief.

Isabel is planning the wedding with Don and Tina. Jaime informs her that his son refuses to come to the wedding.

At the clubhouse (lionera – lion’s den), Pat and Santiago hear the doorbell and race to the door. Santi practices his sexy looks. In walk Bárbara, Candy, and Isabel dressed like saloon girls. Isabel asks her son which piece of clothing she should remove first if she loses. Pat thinks it’s entertaining but Santiago is scandalized. He goes to look for more clothing because he knows his mother is a good poker player. Then they engage in some man-haters vs. chauvinists banter. Santi tries to cut the evening short, but his mama overrules him. In the next scene, the boys are down to their tee shirts, Pat has already lost his pants, and Santiago loses his pants next. Notice we see Jaime Camil’s thighs but not his calves. Never his silly calves. The girls haven’t lost anything yet. Pat tries to quit but Isabel won’t let him.

Meño puts Chava to bed because his mama is out playing strip poker. Chava is glad to have Charly back home, and he admits that in the hospital he was afraid of dying. When Chava asks, Meño admits that he will die one day. Charly pulls him aside and warns him that it had better not be for a long, long time.

Paulina arrives at Santiago’s house, and Donato lets her in. HEY! I thought he was supposed to keep her out! Paulina asks Don if she remembers him, and he answers, “After all you did, who could forget?” Rocío is thrilled to see her, and Pau wastes no time; she starts right in telling Rocío how much she would love New York. Rocío’s mother puts her to bed. Her loving, adoring, attentive, affectionate mother who didn’t even have three minutes to talk to Rocío any time in the past seven years. We were wondering who would become the evil villainess in this novela, the kind you’d like to sink your teeth into. Would it be Alicia or Marissa? Well my money is on the dark horse. Pau asks Rocío how she feels about the new baby, and Roc is worried that her papa won’t pay attention to her anymore. Pau suggests that Roc come live with her in New York. It’s a perfectly normal suggestion, since Pau can’t stand to be apart from her beloved daughter (whom she hasn’t bothered talking to in seven years). Lucía steps in like a mama bear in training, with all the grit she inherited from her abuela, and she sets Paulina straight. “It’s hard when all you have of your mother is a photo.” Marissa joins the girls’ night out in, dragging Pau’s suitcase, suggesting that this is the time for her to leave. Rocío introduces her as Mama Marissa.

CHICK FIGHT! Complete with hair pulling. Santiago has been so worried, wondering who would keep Paulina away, and the ruby slippers have been right under his nose. Marissa throws out Pau, along with her suitcase, and the two trade insults, arguing which one is trashier. Santiago walks in along with his mother, and he looks at the woman he hasn’t seen since the day she crushed his soul. She acts like she just got back from a business trip, glad to see her husband again. She tries to wheedle an invitation from him to stay at the house, but Mama Bear runs interference. “At this house there is no room for you. It’s better if you leave now.” Santiago speaks not a word, except to congratulate his mama and novia for a job well done. Sorry to disappoint you, friends. No staircase of death tonight. Maybe death took the elevator.

At her house, Candy and Bárbara are rehashing their poker night. Barb thinks Candy was playing with fire, spending the evening with her two suitors. Candy says her next column will ponder what a woman does if she likes two men. More man-hater rhetoric. Barb asks, point blank, which one she loves. Candy tries to dodge, but must confess that she loves Santiago.

Back at the casa de lágrimas, amid strains of Kany Garcia (I love her music), Chayo is again waiting for Ed to get home, while she stares at the roses that were supposed to demonstrate how much he loves her. Ed tries to sneak in and she pretends to be asleep.

Candy lies in bed pondering the pains of life. Pat sits alone doing the same. Santiago doesn’t have as much time to feel sorry for himself. His daughter needs some lovin’ right about now, and she knows where to find it. Her papa leaves no doubt how much he treasures his princesa.

In the morning, Candy reassures Chava because of his fears of death. Since he doesn’t want to get up for school, she calls him “flojito” (lazybones).

Chayo is pouring her heart out to Candy. “Ed came home at three, smelling of perfume. Why does he hurt me like this when I love him so much? What am I doing wrong?”

In his office, Pat and Alicia talk about the success of his art business. He has a new product that he expects will sell well, but it’s better if Alicia doesn’t see it. In the artist’s workshop, she discovers that it’s a painting of Candy in a feathered headdress. The “Aztec Princess.” Somehow I never imagined Aztecs with pointy noses, fine bones, and fair skin. But what do I know? Ali marches into Pat’s office and chews him out for humiliating her like this.

Paulina pushes her way into Santiago’s office and suggests that she take Rocío to live in New York for awhile. “Request denied. She stays here in Mexico with me.” She sashays to his side of the desk and makes her most convincing argument with a very suggestive kiss, and suggests that he lock the door. He wants to resist but his emotions are in too much of a tornado; he can’t pull himself together. He obviously has a weakness for her.

In Pat’s office, Pat and Ali scrap back and forth about who is at fault and who is a fool. Review their positions listed above.

Bárbara alerts Candy that her mother called. Santiago is at her house, and he’s not doing well.

Candy finds Santiago waiting at her house. He says, “Paulina came back, and there are things that cannot be removed, because if they are removed, it hurts even more. The past came back. And what’s happening to me is a little like what’s happening to you with Patricio. I need advice because.. I used to be so sure.” I think (other opinions welcome) that what he’s saying is that he never resolved his feelings about Paulina, he just buried them. Now that she’s back, his feelings have come back to haunt him. Along with asking her for help, maybe he comprehends that Candy is going through the same difficulties, and maybe he hopes the two of them can work through it with each other’s help. Remember that for a long time now, he has been working at healing her.

He is interrupted by Alicia at the door. She begs Candy not to destroy her life again. She destroyed it once when she couldn’t dance anymore. Now Pat is all she has. If Candy doesn’t leave him alone, Ali doesn’t know what she’ll do (but the implication is muy grave).

Alicia leaves, Candy is impactada, and Santiago has something to say. “I know this is a very bad time, but it’s the right time for me to say, you and I have to give “us” a chance. Santiago gives Candy a kiss.
Not a kiss that says, “Hey, Baby, you’re hot!”
Not a kiss that says, “You’re wonderful and I can’t stop thinking about you.”
Not a kiss that says, “Can’t you feel how much I love you?” nor even, “Can’t you feel how much you love me?”
Instead, it’s a kiss that says, “Candy, we were made for each other. This is our moment, and we must seize it because what we can have is too profound to miss.”

What could possibly move Candy to reject an appeal like that? Chava comes down the steps, sees them kissing, pushes Santiago away with all his 45 pounds of might, and says, “Don’t kiss my mama. I already have a papa.”

Tomorrow: In front of Alicia and Gregoria, Pat tells Candy, “The only one I’ve ever loved is you (#P-1).”

Labels: Tontas