Caray, Caray!

**Are any of you old enough to remember the Mystery Date game from the 60's? It was just one of the many tortures we girls were forced to endure from that era.

Ah well, enough reminiscing from the good old days of Mystery Date and Suzie Homemaker, our characters have their own problems to deal with...

Alicia asks Pato "Why are you with me?" He tells her the truth, he doesn't know. They made a big mistake but she was there for him when he was alone, so basically he owes her. She tells him he's afraid to be alone, he'd crumble. "And you would crumble (desmoronar) if I left you," he retorts. "No, I would die because I love you," she concludes, leaving him speechless.

Donato sneaks into the bridal chamber and replaces some photo with another. Who are these guys? OK, turns out he's removed a pic of Jaime's favorite futballer Omar Bravo and replaced it with Bruno Marioni. He proudly tells Santiago, snicker snicker.

Jaime complains to Isa about this. Seems stupid to me but it's a big deal to him. She thinks it's stupid too; is Bruno Marioni one of his sons, or an Italian scientist? Santi joins in and gets blamed. Donato finally fesses up. I can't believe I wasted time recapping this scene. Isa sighs that men are boys in long pants.

Candy and Chava roast marshmallows and tell scary stories under the perpetual half moon that always hangs high in the sky. She tells him not to be afraid because their tent is magically anti-fear. He tells her not to be afraid because he'll protect her. I'm surprised Pato's not lurking in the shrubbery. What am I saying? Of course he is, or will be soon.

Donato has a heart to heart with Santi. He's in love but it's an impossible love, she's married. Santi thought he liked Tina? But no, once he's alone Donato takes a small pic of Isa out of his pocket, sighs, and looks toward heaven. Aha! We knew it, right Carlos?

Raul visits Marissa and she bitches why is he always at her place? He's afraid, he doesn't understand how she's going to pay back Santi for all his infidelities. She snarls Santi is about to become one of the most miserable men in the world. No, she's not going to commit suicide, it'll be something much worse than blood. Raul looks creeped out, even more than usual.

Santi goes to the grounded tree house and talks to himself about guess what? If you guess Candy you would be right. Marissa ominously voices over that Santi is living his last days of tranquility and peace, because after the wedding he'll return to see neither her nor his child.

Candy and Chava (wearing some cool Light Vision Goggles) hear a scary noise, is it a beast? Well yes actually, it's Pato come to join the fun. I notice that nobody has instructed Chava you're not supposed to stare at people in the face with a head lamp. Pato brought Chava a gift, a compass (brujula) which excites the hell out of the kid. He also brought a radio set and other outdoorsy stuff. Good job dad. Kid wants dad to sleep with them but dad says he'll sleep outside to protect them. Candy is looking a bit more enamored of her ex.

Lalo is preparing a surprise dinner for his wife but the mood is ruined when the utility man shows up to turn the lights off. Unfortunately Lalo doesn't have his receipt to show the guy. He calls "Hortensita" but she's rather busy, she waves sweetly to a gentleman friend who's in her room. Does Horty have a mystery date? Will he be a dream, or a dud? She tells Lalo she can't bring the receipt over, another day perhaps.

After Chava falls asleep Candy joins Pato by the fire. He says when she left him life ended for him, he was sad and drank a lot blah blah blah and Alicia helped and was... "Sex!" pipes up Candy. Pato can't deny it, but he cried a lot, he missed her a lot. Candy admits she missed him and cried for him too. I think maybe this was their very first mature and honest conversation.

Santi can't sleep and hypes out in his bedroom, listens to music, golfs, looks at his phone, and finally calls Candy. Unfortunately Meño answers, Candy's not there. He advises Santi to just marry Candy once and for all! Greg is giving herself a manicure and makes a sour face. Meño reveals that Pato asked for his help with Candy. That's it, Santi plays hardball by promising to do Meno's eyelids for free. Eyelids and chin, negotiates Meno.

Back to Pato and Candy and back to the same old, when she saw him with Alicia she thought she was going to die but then she discovered she was pregnant with Chava which gave her the will to live. She says she didn't ever try to find Pato because she could live without love but never without dignity. Pato hopes that one day she can learn to trust him again.

Chava wakes up and Candy gives him permission to invite dad to sleep in the tent. Allrighty then.

Santi's phone rings. He answers it without looking, "Hello Marissa, what do you want? Eye tacos? Yes my love, whatever you say my love."

Horti is fawning over her mystery date, taking his shoes off, helping him onto the bed. We see his tennis shoes on the floor but can't make out his face. Ding dong, it's Lalo at the door and he wants his receipt for the utility bill. He peeks into her bedrooom and is very excited to see she's not alone.

Sleepy Santi shows up with the eye tacos but Mari says she already ate cold pizza, he can have the eye tacos. He looks like he's going to hurl and she squeals in evil delight that he is having sympathy nausea. She'd invite him to stay but she knows he likes to have brekkies with his peeps. He can take the eye tacos home for breakfast but he shouldn't eat them cold because they stick to the palate. Santi stumbles out about to puke and sinister music plays as Marissa makes her meanest bulldog face.

Back at camp, Candy spends a restless night moaning "Why Patricio? It could have been so great with you," while Pato mumbles in his sleep. She notes how alike father and son are.

Next morning the half moon is still high in the sky as Chava takes a precarious stroll on the rickety dock while mom and pop doze in blissful ignorance of the danger at hand. We see the dinghy line come loose and the dinghy float away.

It's breakfast time at the big house. Santi is sleepy and Isa scolds him for being Marissa's bitch, she's tired of seeing Marissa abuse him. He falls asleep while she's talking to him.

Candy wakes up and calls for Chava. She sees the rickety dock then the overturned dinghy in the middle of the lake! Pato swims for it, no sign of the boy!

Alicia calls Gregoria to complain that she slept alone thanks to her zorra of a sister. The cell phone pays for Pato's absence by finding itself hurled onto the floor.

Pato's back on shore, he and Candy are going through Chava's bag. Pato thinks to call him on his radio that he conveniently gave to him the night before. Chava answers, whew!! But he's lost. But he has his compass! They help him figure out the direction of the camp. Suddenly, from a dead standstill, Chava trips over the ledge, drops both radio and compass, and ends up hanging onto a tree.

Patricio MacGyver fashions a compass out of a plate of water and a magnetized needle to find the direction. I probably would have figured out the general direction by where the sun rose but what do I know, especially when the half moon always hangs high in the sky.

At last they find Chava squealing and barely able to hold onto the tree. Pato "rappels" 10 feet down a 45 degree slope to rescue his son. With a mighty grunt Pato and Chava climb the rope the difficult 10 feet back up to mama and the reunited family hugs.

Hortencia makes breakfast for her "Precious". We still don't see his face but the back of his head looks a bit young. Is he a boy toy or is he a secret kid? The way these telenovela moms treat their sons it's hard to tell sometimes. To further confuse us she gives him kisses all over his face.

Back at Candy's house Pato kisses Chava goodbye. Candy tells Pato he should know how she feels about Santiago. He asks is she in love? "I'm confused," she answers. He grunts knowingly and thanks her for the great time, the best day of his life. (Uh, Candy, when you want to make a big announcement about how you feel, "I'm confused" is a bit anti-climactic.)

Over at the institute Marissa annoys Candy by blathering about her honeymoon to the Greek Islands and then teasing Candy about being jealous. Candy annoys Marissa by admitting she can't keep her promise, she can't get Santi out of her head. She's not betraying Marissa or trying to take the father away from her kid, but she can't stop thinking about him. (Good topper there Candy.) Marissa is now super annoyed and gets a satanic look on her face as Candy rushes out. "Don't turn me into a witch, Candy, or you'll see the devil," she threatens.

Mañana: Meño's boyfriend's son shows up and says he's not there to discuss the death of his father, he's there to tell Meño his family is going to sell all their Guadalajara property. Yes, all of it!

Labels: Tontas