Caray, Caray!

Absolutely loved the vamp scene with Lulu tonight. Who cares if it was just a dream!? When she came sashaying in to the Mariachi love song, blowing sexy kisses at the musicians and a trembling little Toño it was hot, hot, hot! Almost as good as her rubbing whipped cream all over the fridge when attempting to seduce Meño. The actress is fabulous at sexy humor and I look forward to a fully realized romance with our height-challenged waiter muy pronto. But for now, we have a few other seductions, and failed attempts to cover, so let's get started, amigos.

I figure you know everything that happened last night, either from viewing or from reading Paula's fine recap so let's get to the hot, juicy new stuff. First Santiago's belt buckle, and the rest of him, arrives at Paulina's hotel room to retrieve errant Rocio. Paulina is strangely compliant, astonishing Santiago by purring "your daddy is right. So be good, trot on home with him, darling" (or words to that effect). Santiago is astonished and actually pops back in the door to thank Paulina. He leaves and she gets her crafty and cunning look on. We know for sure she's plotting something.

And now the Mariachis...singing on-key "Solamente una vez, ame en la vida"...One only truly loves once in life and ay yi yi...enter Lulu in a form-fitting plum colored clingy dress, showing off her bounteous curves, looking luscious, sexy, seductive and ready to give Toño a sizzling "beso". Alas, our lovers end up, eyes closed, about 6 inches away from each other. Dang! It was just a dream, but hey, we know this is a dream that CAN come true. So stay tuned. I love these two as a couple.

But THIS couple, not so much. Yep, I'm talking about Gregoria and Pato's sleazy dad. He's wanting to know why she's acting so strange and whether or not she liked the "chicken" last night (I kept wondering if there was a double entendre there or if they really did eat "pollito" at the restaurant). Anyway, she stammers out that dinner was delicious and er, so was the rest. But she just can't handle the guilt. Whoops. This intimate encounter is interrrupted by Sleazebag's current, though separated, wife, who apologizes for the intrusion but is looking for backup in her fight with hubby over money. Naturally Gregoria has to side with her.

But back to our dear Lulu. She's asking Candy for advice (God knows why) and confessing that she kissed Toño but isn't sure of his reaction. His eyes were wide open and then he skedaddled. Or as she says "patatin patatan" and off he went. Not quite the reaction a lovelorn gal would want.

Zamora, back at the restaurant, is trying like mad to find out what "novia" his buddy Toño was dreaming of. They play at hot hot hot, cold cold cold until he figures out it's someone who works at the restaurant. Ye gods! Doña Gogo is corrupting minors, he thinks.

And our favorite little minor, Rocio, is way deep in the blues. She can't even eat, she's so blue, although Granny finally wins her over with a tray of food brought by Donato. And also explains that Daddy is punishing her not because she was "bad" but because she scared him to death by running off from home. He just wants you to think about your actions, she adds gently. Will you help me think about it, Grandmother, sniffles Rocio. Ahhhh....what's not to love about this kid?

The advice session continues with Candy and she whips out her favorite saying "Love has no dress size". Easy for our svelte heroine to say. Lulu knows different. You should see how men look at me, she insists. All they see is "fat".

Now a scene with Marissa and Alicia. And I have some kind of mental block with these two. I NEVER clearly get what they saying to each other and it's something to do with the repulsion I feel for their schemes, I think. So if I'm off...credit my mental illness. Marissa seemed to be saying something about wanting pictures (or videos?) of Santiago desperately looking for her when she has disappeared to have the baby. And Alicia's worried that Marissa is going to double-cross her and wants reassurance that she'll really hand over the infant. And Marissa says sure...I want nothing to do with bottoms, diapers or all the rest. That's what I got. Aaaargggh. If I'm wrong, let me know...I'll fix it. I really do have a block with these two. I'm only human. Mercifully, we break for an ad.

Now another odd couple...but with potential. Donato and Tina. She wants to know if he's still carrying around a photo of Doña Isabella and he is. But it's an impossible love. Nevertheless he's happy that she's happy with her new husband. And guess what...He has a little corner of his heart and who is nestled there? a cute, flirtateous cook (Tina!) Hmmm...this could go places.

Okay, meddling time. Isabella has called Candy to come over so she can let her know Santiago's not marrying Marissa. And it's Candy's fault...'cause he's in love with her. This prompts our heroine to trot up to Santiago's room to talk to him. She's creeping in the door when he informs her he's naked. Our eternal virgin covers her eyes. He reassures her that he has a towel (actually it's a robe) but she better get used to naked men if she's going to spend the next 50 years with him. Whoops, the towel has dropped he adds. And Candy skedaddles. I just can't deal with your son, she huffs to Isabella.

So Mom marches up and when she comes to the door, Santiago laughs and says, Ha, couldn't resist, came back to see me in the buff. Whoops. It's his "santa, pura y casta" (holy, pure and chaste) madonna of a mother. And a "metiche" (meddler) as well. She admits to meddling, and Tina, who happens to be passing by, ogles Santiago in his robe (showing off a bit of chest hair) and reminds him that "her door is always open". Whew...lots of heat in this episode but none of it actually goes anywhere.

Speaking of heat, we have a sexy little scene in the fertility doctor's office. He's a poker-faced (no pun intended) humorless guy but there seems to be a misunderstanding on Chayo's part with performance and sterility. Once they establish that Eduardo just has to produce a "muestra" (sample) for the doctor to analyze, they're both hot to trot with Chayo promising all sorts of help...like dancing, a little whipping etc, chortles Eduardo in anticipation. And they're off to the races. Doc never cracks a smile. Well, he's not having any fun but we surmise our young couple will.

Now we're back at Santiago's house with malevolent Marissa stalking the grounds. Rocio is mad at her because she's told her there's no "hermanito" for her. So she doesn't like the baby OR Marissa. Our witch is outraged. After all I've done for you, she shrieks. When witch no. 2, Paulina, arrives and chases her off. Rocio goes off with Pau, leaving her playmate Chava all alone.

The squabble continues inside. Marissa's complaining about her treatment to Santi. She's also mad that Candy was there. Rocio and Paulina arrive and are perched together and Rocio wants to be just like mom and dress just like her. See how pretty mom is? she adds. Santiago wisely says nothing. And another ad break.

When we come back, more malice aforethought. Isabella's defending her right to let Candy in...after all, it's her house, and Marissa threatens her saying "Too bad for your grandson." Ick. Another mental block for me. Aaaagh. A little humor break here with Donato and Santiago seeming to hear Isabella's thoughts, and the scene ends with Santiago deciding to put an end to it, once and for all. He's sick of Marissa's behavior and her threats. (and so are we)

Back at the restaurant, Lulu is now having that 7th grade chat with Zamora. You know the one....did he ask about me? Do you think he likes me? Does he ever talk about me? Zamora makes some remark about her "abundance" of charms and she's afraid she's not ready for a real life romance.

And Santiago's not ready to marry Marissa. Not now. Not ever. She reverts to threats again. That's it for you kid, she says to her poor unborn child. Don't mess with me Marissa, snaps Santiago. I'm not playing she assures him. We're a package deal, you don't take me, you don't get the kid. Santi protests that this is not a self-service cafeteria but she doesn't budge. I'll just be a single mother.....like so many single mothers all over the world, she sighs.

Alright, another minor humor break in this dreck. Rocio and Chava are having a little domestic dispute in the play house (the one the Abandonados built for Santiago's boy-to-be). She "cooked" so she wants him to do the dishes. But men don't do dishes, that's women's work according to his grandmother Gogo. Men watch soccer on tv while their wives do the dishes. Isabella tactfully concludes that there are differences of opinion on this.

Cece is moving into Soledad's apartment at the same moment Patricio comes to pick up Beto. Soledad follows him out and wants to know if she can "call him sometime". Patricio tells her he's not in a good place right now. She knows....she understands. He's angry...and she's angry too, because she gave him up with without a fight, and she's angry also because someone (Candy!) has hurt him. Pato seems to soften at this. Hmmm...could be potential here. Who knows? And we've got another ad.

Yikes...when we get back, the subject is premature ejaculation. Lordy, we're covering every topic possible in this blasted telenovela. Glum wife, 20 years without an orgasm, is wondering if she'll have the courage to tell her husband things need to change. And Barbara assures her it's a problem that's very easy to fix. (Really?) I could do without returning to this topic....but I'm sure we will. And it'll all be hunky-dory no doubt.

Now some mirror scenes, with the Abandonados teasing Eduardo about his sterility issues and jokes about performance failures on their parts, (quickly denied of course) and the girls are on a similar topic, recalling how romantic encounters fizzled and they had to change from being a girlfriend to a "mother", reassuring the poor lad that "it happens to everybody sometime". And some lame jokes, in my opinion. Cece tells one about Tarzan talking to a mouse or rat (raton) and saying, So little and yet with a mustache! And the raton says to Tarzan, And you soooo big and yet still with a diaper!. Didn't do much for me but if it floats your boat, enjoy.

More girl talk, this time with Rocio, Lucia and Paulina. Rocio's complaining that she can't sleep with the light on. Lucia has to have it on; she's studying for a test tomorrow. Isabella enters just when Rocio says to Paulina, And you're going to give me a little brother, right mom? Impactada look from Isabella. And Paulina laughs and says....Oh my, the things that children say!

Patricio is having dinner with Alicia and she's had the mysterious, never-to-be seen Eva fix his favorite meal. He reminds her this is just a dinner to talk business. She reminds him that she needs to know how much money she can count on per month.....why?...so she'll know how much she can buy for HIS baby. Not my baby, he snaps. I'll support you in the adoption but it's your baby, not mine. She makes a crack about dessert and sugar overload, given how bitter he is. Way to go, Alicia.

The evening's winding down. Soledad and Cece are talking while Beto sleeps with her head on her lap. They're talking about loneliness, and Cece's almost marriage (until she told her fiance about her sexual preferences and he vanished) and how her mother kicked her out when she learned about it. Cece shares about the fear that people who are different sexually experience. The fear of being rejected, pointed at, talked about, discriminated against.....Soledad is wide-eyed and just beginning to understand that there are many kinds of loneliness. Not just her particular loneliness of wanting a man all her own.

And the evening is winding down at Santiago's as well (or at least he thinks it is...he's in for a surprise). He bids Donato good-night and tells him to "keep on with your rounds, Lieutenant", then tiptoes into the girls' room to kiss Rocio and Lucia good-night, then into his own room where, yikes! a barely covered Paulina lounges in his bed. Evidently she plans to start working on that "hermanito" that very night. In words that echo his to Candy earlier that day, she admits that she has absolutely nothing on under her robe. And doesn't get any more action than Santi did earlier.

Alicia's not getting anywhere with Patricio either. She can't hang around for the meeting with the Japanese that he's planning because she's got her own trip planned. Well then, he thought he'd stay at the house while she's gone. I know you're not living with Candy anymore and that it didn't work out, and I'm sorry, Alicia says. But this is YOUR home and you're always welcome.
Nope, Alicia hasn't given up. Just changed tactics.

And Paulina hasn't given up either. She's delighted Santi's not going to marry Marissa (well, we're all delighted, honey) but she'd sure like to provide some warm comfort to her former husband in the meantime. Santiago reminds her that he was crazy in love with her when they married, and she gave him the most wonderful daughter in the world....Rocio...but as a couple, they're OVER. This doesn't make much of a dent until he adds....and I'm in love with another woman. Impactada look from Paulina. And that's it for this evening. Goodnight all.

Previews: Paulina's still arguing her case...she'll be Santi's lover, his secret romance. Will he fall for that? Tune in tomorrow and find out.

Vocabulary:

Proverb of the Day: En boca cerrada no entran moscas. (lit. flies don't enter a closed mouth.) If you keep your mouth shut, you won't put your foot in it. Or...Silence is golden. Eduardo said this when Chayo was telling the doctor that sometimes he had "performance failures".

A similar proverb: Por la boca muere el pez. (the fish dies by it's mouth) Talking too much is dangerous.... or again, Silence is golden.

hacer una montaña de un granito de arena = making a mountain out of a little grain of sand. we'd say "making a mountain out of a molehill". Chayo, speaking to Eduardo about his fears of having to give a "sample".

eso es otro cantar = that's another story (lit. another singing)

discolo(a) = unruly, disobedient. Santiago speaking about Rocio

no me copie = I didn't "track" follow...Zamora, getting befuddled during the Abandonado's rapid fire discussion.

muestra = sample, specimen

Labels: Tontas