Caray, Caray!

Quickie from the end of yesterday's episode that I missed when I fell asleep...the last thing I remember is Beto's totally cool, tangerine-colored, new set of wheels. Nieves is on cloud 9 at the success of her Betito. Up drives Chris with his police pals and he proposes very sweetly and earnestly! Pau couldn't be happier and all is well with their relationship at last. Good for Chris. Monita gives a rather adorable boxing lesson to Dani while at the same time glaring at Mau for daring to use Dani to get to her. Oscar calls Hissy and wants a Momia update. Hissy says Momia deserves to go to jail and she's going to pay for her liberty not only for the life of Salvador but also for Valentina. Tonight their little murderer is going to kill Valentina. Momia is visited by Jairo who tells her that Moni will take a fall in the third round. El Lobo and Jairo discuss this, Lobo is unhappy and Jairo is threatening. Mientras tanto Beto is lurking and overhears the plan.

On to tonight's show:
Beto overhears Jairo threatening El Lobo to pay his debt by having Monita throw the fight in the third round. Beto manages to remain quiet but after Jairo leaves he lets the flatulence fly and wonder of wonders, it's not censored! El Lobo recognizes the scent of another male in his territory, mainly because his eyes are watering from the stink, and pulls Beto out into the open by his tie. Lobo is cute but the lights might not be on upstairs, he doesn't seem to suspect Beto of eavesdropping. Beto says he's just there to show his woman something.

Beto is super impressed by Coni's flexibility and excitedly drags her to admire his naco-mobile complete with orange shag luchador arena in the back. How does she like his ship, his fantasy mobile? She is...speechless. After she displays sufficient "admiration" he asks what she is doing with the likes of Lobo and Jairo? Is she planning to play dirty with Monita? She's going to fight clean right? Coni tells him that she's going to do what it takes to win because Monita took everything away from her. "But not with traps (by cheating)" he reasons.

While Coni plans her skulduggery Monita further endears herself to the viewers by spending her day giving little Dani the full boxeadora workout complete with situps, punching bag and hugs.

Mauricia just happens to be talking to The Governor on the phone when Beto tears in and insists Mau hang up, what he has to say is so important it cannot wait. Mau over emotes, SEOR GOBERNADOR, i.e. get a clue Beto, but Beto grabs the phone and hangs it up. Monita is in danger because El Lobo has sold the fight, he's going to make her lose, she's going to get the black hand! (be double-crossed)

Beto is talking in double speed so Mau tells him "don't get distracted". Words to live by, Beto. He composes himself and explains to Mau that Jairo is a mafioso who will allow Lobo to repay his debt by making sure that Momia wins the fight. Mau KNEW that wolf was bad news. Beto confirms that Lobo is not an honest and hard working type like he and Mau are. What are they going to do about Monita? Mau, in his typical airhead way of act-not-plan rushes out the door telling Beto to leave it to him. I wonder how he's going to screw things up this time?

Estrella is ironing her clothes and complaining about her big (practically invisible to me) belly when Xime drops in for a visit. I guess Xime's been out of the preggers loop because she tells Estre she's putting on weight, watch out or she'll look pregnant. "Hello, earth to Xime, I'm three months along!"

Beto helps alleviate his angst by playing with his luchador dollies and drinking a can of beer in his office. The hawt receptionist (name?) rushes in to warn him that his suegro is here!

Marcos comments how happy he is to see Beto working (Ha!!) so hard as the General Director. But he, Marcos, has problems and could not sleep last night. He tossed and turned all night long. "Alone I hope," sez Beto, is Marcos preoccupied with the Porcupine? No, Marcos is worried about tonight's fight. So is Beto and he sneaks a slurp from his beer under the desk. Marcos says he's got to do something so that both his daughters get out of the ring. Beto pushes his pencil off the desk and sneaks another slurp. Beto must be getting a buzz on because he starts pulling Marcos's chain about Coni. Marcos tells Beto to have respect! Beto says, with all due respect, it is his flaca who likes to disrepect everyone else.

Xime remembers why she visitied Estrella, she has something important to tell her. A few days ago Rolu and Arni played a joke on her and now she has a super joke to play in return but she needs an actress like Estrella, someone who can manipulate men. Estrella's not in the mood, she misses Aldo, Moni is mad at her and feels alone. But we know Xime likes to get her way and she has three things to say. Una, Estre can count on xime for anything and shouldn't feel alone. Two, if Estre helps Xime with this joke it will distract her and she'll have fun. Three, why can't I ever understand the third thing she says? Something about Estre's cheeks?

Over at the Villa of the Vile Aldo frets because Oscar seems to be getting more erratic and on the verge of exploding.

Oscar el Odio walks through the woods with a shovel. He mutters that if Coni doesn't pay then very soon the police will find the body of his colleague Licenciado Araujo along with all the proof. Is he planning to set Coni up? Bury the others?

Speaking of which, Coni visits Jairo's Headquarters with a case of money. She sold her house, her boutique, everything, and she plans to bet all of it. Jairo says if she beats Monita then she will triple her money. Coni comments that Moni might be the champion but tonight she, Constanza, will be the victor.

Mau confronts Lobo face to face, he knows about Jairo wanting Moni to throw the fight. This is his great plan? But wait, Moni walks up behind and hears. "Et tu Jairo?" she asks. Mau gloats in triumph.

OK, we're about halfway through and I want to know where in the heck the wedding is? Tick tock tick tock writers.

We are back from the commercial and the chest thumping continues. With Moni at his side to protect him Mau accuses with renewed vigor. But Moni's not on board and she wants him to beat it. Nothin' doin', blondie stays. Lobo weaves his pathetic web of deceit, he owed Jairo money because he refused to throw a fight, now after all this time he's come back to confront his past. Of course he won't let Monita pay his debt blah blah blah. Moni believes him. Mau insists that Beto heard what he heard. Then it comes out that Momia is Moni's sister and now Lobo is another one who knows.

Back at Estre's she and Xime are role playing. Xime is practicing ways to say "No" to Rolu. She kind of looks like a frenetically angry mere-cat, but still very cute. Estre is a taskmistress and wants Xime to say more, be mad, cry. Xime tries to cry, but the hysterical laughter's not quite what Estre had in mind. Xime has a great idea, Estre will play act Xime and then Xime will play act Estre acting like Xime!

At the Cabaña of Crime Oscar is giving final checks to his bodyguards and the nice nurse. Uh oh, wonder what she'll do? I sure wouldn't want to be with those two gorillas if I were her. Oski says he has a special tip for her. It's a picture of her two little kids, it would be terrible if something happened to them. She agrees to gather her things and disappear forever. Whew, she's saved, but will she help Sal?

Over at the vecindad the friends, neighbors and employees of Grupo Sermeño are gathered for some mysterious reason. They discuss the impending fight and fate of the hood. Xime suggests yoga to help calm Monita.

Two serious-looking guys arrive and announce they are there to conduct a wedding. (Hooray!!) Nieves assumes that Marcos has arranged it. (Good for her!) Mau says Pau called and invited them. De repente a beauteously beaming Pau in white and Christian in a navy uniform arrive and everyone smiles except for the cranky snake lady.

Secreto de Amor serenades us while the couple marries. Mau sighs and looks at Moni. She looks back and juts her chin. Don Cesar glares at Marcos. Beto separates them. Hawt receptionist undresses Ivan with her eyes. The ladies cry. Gabi cries harder. The novios sign the contract and kiss while the crowd applauds and throws flowers. Wow, that was fast. At least Pau and Christian are happy.

Nice nurse runs up to the prisoners and tells them she's sorry but she has to leave for the sake of her children. She says Oski is on the verge of doing something terrible to them. Sal tells Aldo to keep his cool, they have to wait.

Shortly Oski and Loriloca come up, she wants to know what is the surprise he has in store for her. He assures her she'll absolutely die when she finds out. Oski pats his gun and commands them to obey. "Let's go."

The wedding having quickly concluded we are now at the gym. It's all glitzed out for the impending Mummy-Monkey fight. Don Cesar coaches Moni to relax. After DC leaves the room Jairo enters for a friendly visit. He asks her if she likes pictures. He shows her something on his cell phone and tells her she'll throw the fight in the third round otherwise the Wolfman will be a Deadman.

Moni laughs nervously and says she believes nothing. Jairo makes a call and hands the phone over. Lobo has been worked over pretty badly, has a purple eye, and he tells her not to throw the fight. Moni squares off but maintains her cool. Jairo laughs and counts to three, the third round. Adios, and we are left gazing at the Monkey/Momia poster.

The gloomy three tramp through the woods while the crazy one babbles happily about her upcoming wedding. "We're here" Oscar says, pushing the shovel into the ground. Oscar tells her to blindfold Sal and herself. Loca things it's muy romantico and Oscar tells Aldo to dig. This is beginning to creep me out.

Moni runs out to Mau and tells him about Jairo. If she throws the fight they'll lose the neighborhood, but it's worse to lose a life. She is, as my granny used to say, between the devil and the deep blue sea. Mau grabs Beto and tells him he needs his help.

Back at the theatre of the absurd Aldo digs and I must say he's very fast with that shovel because he's already quite deep. He asks Oski to let them go, he promises they'll never say anything. (Does this ever work?) Oski points his gun and asks if Aldo hears violins. Loca is getting excited, violins at their wedding? Aldo keeps digging.

Jimmy gives Coni a massage and pep talk. Beto comes in to give her a good luck kiss and irritate her enough so she flounces out of the room. He fills Jimmy in on the Jairo biz.

The crowd gathers in the arena. Nieves has her signature monkey on one shoulder and Marcos at the other. Don Cesar glares through the crowd at Isabel.

Jairo gleefully threatens Lobo, for his own good he'd better hope Moni does as instructed. There is a knock on the door and the bodyguard who kind of looks like Mau (could he be his double?) opens it to the maelstrom that is Mauricio. In flies the Fantasma Vengador executive-style punching his way through the bad guys. He stops in front of the beaten bug-eye Lobo (he only has one good eye, the other is swollen shut) and glares with that one expression of his.

Mañana: Will Sal and Aldo finally escape? Will Hissy really put all that poison in one sports bottle? Will Marcos tell the Mummy she has another sister? Will Coni have a conscience?

Vocab (not all are new):
jugar chueco = play crooked, play dirty
meter la mano negra = make illegal, lacking moral values, a hidden agenda (historically a Spanish anarchist organization, La Mano Negra; also a band that Manu Chao formed in 1987)
mi nave = my ship, my ride
mi fantasmovil = my fantasy mobile
no te distraigas = don't get distracted
no te tires! = don't throw it (the fight)
trampas = traps, skulduggery, monkey-business

Dicho of the day (an old friend):
entre la espada y la pared = between the devil and the deep blue, between a rock and a hard place (Lit. between the sword and the wall)

Labels: gancho