Caray, Caray!

Last night we left a distraught Regina begging for help from the feckless crowd at the park. Meanwhile, cute but kidnapped Reginita is being tucked into her new car seat by mommy dearest who can actually hear big Regina’s plaintive wailing. Wow, how cold can you get? Pepa smugly drives off with her baby booty.

Isidro rushes to see pallid Roberto at the hospital. Roberto gasps that he needs to see Regina to ask her forgiveness. She has to know he loves her. Roberto flatlines and it’s so long Sebastien; his work here is done.

Cata and Inez join Regina at the police station. Regina assures the detective that her husband wouldn’t take the baby.

Pepa packs up the two bawling bebes and prepares to escape. A young valet comments on the adorable twins. The incubation light bulb goes on over Pepa’s head and she hatches her nefarious plot.

I spoke too soon, Roberto is revived. “For now,” the doctor mutters ominously.

Regina is back home, still hysterical that her baby is missing and that the police have nothing to show. Her plan to make pictures to distribute all over the city is interrupted by the doorbell. It’s Isidro who is seriously cara impactada to hear about the kidnapping. He adds unfortunately Roberto cannot help because he had a serious accident last night and he’s very bad off. Regina faints.

Pepa drives like a madwoman, cursing the screaming demon brats and the man who spawned them. Baby Reginita thoughtfully fondles her “R” necklace.

Regina sprints into the hospital. The doctor tells her that Roberto has been asking for her but unfortunately there is probably not much time left. (Twist the knife why dontcha?) He lost a lot of blood in the accident and his heart is weak.

Luckily Roberto wakes up and sees Regina at his side. She sobs that they have to be together to fight for their daughter. Oopsie, will she let it slip? He wants to see Reginita. Regina, in an unlikely moment of telenovela genius, does NOT tell him about Reginita. Instead she thought bubbles to the Virgin of Guadalupe to protect her daughter and husband, to whom she cannot reveal the truth due to his delicate condition.

Pepa calls some rich guy named Gustavo. She tells him she desperately needs his help. They make plans to meet tomorrow. Pepa coos to her Roberta in the high chair and ignores Reginita on the cold ground, not that Reginita seems to care.

Isidro tells Cata that he doesn’t know much about this Pepa, just that Roberto was boinking her. Oh, and she’s capable of anything. Also slightly suspicious, Rob’s accident happened close to where Pepa was in a hotel waiting for him. Cata and Regina jump all over the theory that Pepa must have stolen the baby and caused Rob’s accident to get back at them. Well, if the police in this telenovela are anything like the police in every other telenovela then these ladies won’t see Reginita or Pepa anytime soon. Like at least 24 years, heh.

We have a montage of Inez passing out photos of Reginita all over town, Missing Child, accompanied by odd, ice-skating rink music.

At the police station, Isidro tells Regina and the detective that Roberto planned to make a will leaving his fortune divided equally between his two daughters but that he hadn’t gotten around to it. The detective wonders if Pepa knew this. Isidro confirms that Pepa was, for a while, Rob’s assistant and had the keys to the office so could have seen the documents.

Next morning in the hospital Regina explains to Inez that Reginita needs special care for her heart. Her baby must live a life of tranquility, wherever could she be?

Pepa meets with Gustavo and weaves her lying story that a man done her wrong, knocked her up, abandoned her and is now after her daughters. Gus knows she’s alone in the world, no family, but no way will she let this damn dude take her daughters. She needs to re-register the girls under her name. Will Gus help her? She hits him up for protection. Apparently he is influential in his town. He agrees to help her and she says from this day forward he can count on her unconditionally. The girls are named Roberta and (pause) Renata and are the daughters only of Josefina Alvarez.

Roberto is barely hanging on. Regina tells him that Pepa won’t split them up. Hearing Pepa’s name his heart monitor starts going into overdrive. He mutters “She...she...” Regina asks, “She what? Did she steal our daughter and cause your accident?” Flatline, this time probably for good.

The doc vainly tries to revive Roberto and Regina sobs in the background. The heavenly choir sings as Regina kisses her beloved Roberto goodbye. There is much wailing and crying as you might imagine, through two scenes actually.

Gustavo comes through with the documents and tells Pepa she’s a brave mother for wanting to raise her two daughters on her own. Gus says shes got to lie low. Would she like to be his personal assistant if she doesn’t mind living in such a remote place? She agrees and gives him a hug. In a classic telenovela maneuver she rolls her eyes behind his back.

Pepa prepares formula for the girls. Oops, she runs out so Renata gets water. Pepa tells her that if sis leaves leftovers she’ll get some, otherwise she’s SOL. She’s not going to get special treatment just because of her weak heart. Regina is probably just glad that mommy dearest isn’t giving her a huge gigantic wedgie like the one she’s giving to Roberta.

More hysterical crying in the hospital with Regina blaming herself for Roberto’s death. Cata rightfully points out that if Roberto hadn’t gotten Pepa knocked up then none of this would have happened. Isidro pipes up that Roberto loved Regina deeply. Nevertheless the wailing ensues with renewed vigor. Regina vows she’ll not rest until she finds her daughter. One day that woman will pay for everything she’s done to them.

Sad burial scene montage accompanied by excessive sobbing and a very nice version of Sevillanas del Adios by Elan.

Pepa reads an article or obit sending condolences to Senora Regina Soberon de Gamba over the death of her husband Roberto Gamba. Rest in Peace. She figures he couldn’t denounced her so for now she’s free to live in this odious town. When the girls turn 25 they’ll return to see Regina but for now she’ll have to live in the hell of not knowing what became of her daughter, bwahahahaha!

Regina is complaining to an investigator that her daughter couldn’t have just vanished into thin air. He assures Regina and Cata that they’ve searched the entire country but nada. Regina vows to search the ends of the earth, she'll never give up.

Pepa, acting as Gustavo’s assistent, opens his urgent mail. The envelopes contains pictures of Renata/Reginita and a police drawing of herself! Gus shows up and she quickly hides the evidence. He invites himself to dinner at her place and she gushes it would be her honor, then thought bubbles the old telenovela standby, “Que asco me das (You disgust me),” adding that for now she’s stuck with him in this damn town. Do we know what town they’re in?

Nine years later:
At the wedding of Inez and Isidro Regina prays for their happiness. While she’s there she puts in a good word for her daughter, whom she trusts God will protect and watch over.

Gustavo announces to Pepa that he plans to retire in a few days. Pepa pouts that she’ll be out of work, right? Gus gets all smarmy and coos that he doesn’t want to lose her. He can’t give her work per se but he’d be happy to continue paying for her services, nudge nudge wink wink. She gets bitchy, reminds him it was SHE who helped launch his career as El Presidente Municipal (like mayor?) and if he doesn’t want his wife to find out about them he’d better ante up with a hefty severance.

Like most slimeballs he acts all shocked and betrayed but he tells her to pick up her check tomorrow and then scat. She sarcastically calls him Presidente Municipal and says they’ll never see each other again.

Sweet music plays and a cute little girl in braids runs into the house calling for Roberta. Roberta has a more stylish wig, er hairdo, and is clearly more spoiled. Renata excitedly shows her sis some shirts she bought with her babysitting money. Of course she bought a blouse for her sister too. Renata runs upstairs to put her new blouse and ribbons on and Roberta tosses her blouse aside.

Pepa comes home and Roberta tells her that even though mom tells her she has a weak heart she feels fine. Pepa caresses her daughter and silently congratulates herself for her great idea of putting Renata’s illness onto Roberta. So I guess the girls have never actually been to a doctor then. Roberta shows Pepa the blouse and comments that she wishes Renata would have gotten ribbons for her too. Pepa totally overreacts on this ribbon thing. Renata points out that Roberta doesn’t even like ribbons. Pepa doesn’t care, Renata knows the rules, sick sis gets everything that Renata gets. Pepa throws Renata onto the ground and cuts her braids off as punishment. Naughty, lying Roberta watches and at least has the heart to shed a tear. Scary scene with Pepa shrieking and waving the scissors around.

Renata prays to God and asks him why her mommy loves Roberta more than her. “Why does mommy hate me so much?”

Pepa promises Roberta that they’ll move from this damned town within a month. She shows Roberta a magazine cover featuring someone named Constanza and says she plans to be working for her company.

Cut to the DF where Constanza strongly recommends to her very handsome brother Gonzalo that he hire this Josefina who was the right hand woman of the ex Presidente Municipal. I guess Constanza and Pepa/Josefina were in secondary school together. We find out that Gonzalo is a divorced dad with a son. She tells Gonzalo the story about Josefina raising two kids on her own, she needs the work, so Gonzo agrees to hire her.

Elsewhere Regina christens her new center, called the Regina’s Hope Center, for single mothers and their babies who need help, PSA blah blah blah. Cata gushes that the center will help prevent women from doing stupid crap like what Pepa did to...oopsie, foot in mouth. Nice buzz kill on the celebration grandma.

Josefina, now Fina, used to be Pepa, arrives at Gonzo’s office in what looks like a cocktail dress, guess she’s starting “work” right away. She’s hauled along the two girls, hugs all around, gosh the girls are cute, so is Gonzo’s son who shows up with his soccer ball. Renata is warmer and more lovable while Roberta is paler and a sulkier. The son Matías and Renata share a glance that I’m unable to define.

Montage of Regina and Cata celebrating the missing Reginita’s birthdays, year after year, and what they (older mom and grandma) look like now in the present. Now a montage of Constanza and husband celebrating the birthdays of their nieces, and a new grown up Roberta and older Fina, and a new grown up Renata (still wearing red) and older Gonzo whom she calls Papa so I guess Fina snagged her sugar daddy. We finish in a big house with a big, rich family celebrating the birthdays of Renata and Roberta who blow out their candles together. Everyone is happy and the girls, now beautiful of course, hug.

Some smarmy guy approaches Renata and friend and tells her he hopes she made the same wish as he. The qirls are all Que the hell?

Connie comments to Fina that Renata is always lucky with the boys. Fina sourly adds that Roberta is lucky too but with much more discretion. By telenovela rules this means she’s likely a slut. More conversation to let us know that Renata is outgoing and gregarious, Roberta is a stick in the mud, and that no matter what Renata does it’s not good enough for finicky Fina.

Conversation that gets us up to date on the situation: Gonzo tells his sis and cuñado that he wishes his son lived with them but he’s in Spain with mom. Coni reassures him that he’ll come back sooner or later to be with them. Gonzo says he was forced to make a business decision and if he doesn’t hear back from his son in a week he’ll name Renata the Vicepresidente Comercial (VP of Marketing, thanks to Marta for the translation). We learn that when Gonzo married Fina he lost his son. Gonzo feels eternally guilty about this. Guess Matias hated his new evil stepmother so he must be a smart kid.

Fina is across the room angrily thought bubbling that she married Gonzo and got rich but being stuck with Renata all these years has been a torture for her.

Isidro and Inez, who magically age in a split second, visit Regina and Cata with bad news. The most recent investigator has decided to abandon the case. Regina says they’ll find another investigator. Cata the terminal wet blanket worrries that maybe Reginita is dead what with her bad heart and all. Regina rededicates her life to finding her daughter. She will never, ever stop looking for her. I was thinking to count all the times she vows this but I’m afraid I can’t count that high.

The smarmy guy’s name is Diego and he wants to be Renata’s boyfriend. She likes him as a friend but... He forces a kiss on her just in time for Fina to see. Diego skedaddles like a pansy-a** leaving Renata to face Fina who accuses her of being a provocative slut (golfa). She hisses that Renata doesn’t have an idea of how ashamed Fina is of being her mother. Renata is stricken.

Meanwhile Roberta is on the phone talking to some guy with perfect teeth. Oh, it’s that hot, scruffy guy from Corazon Salvaje. He tells her he just arrived in Mexico as a surprise. He's tired of hiding their relationship, he’s worthy of her (Yo soy digno de ti) and wants to meet the family. She begs him not to come and they’ll talk tomorrow. He practically slobbers all over the phone in his eagerness to see his “Bonita”.

Fina shows up, cuts the call short and gripes to Roberta that her sister’s done it again. This time she caught her getting kissy-face with one of her little friends Diego. Roberta gets bent out of shape, Diego is HER friend and was supposed to be flirting with HER! Mami gives her a big hug and promises that Renata will never get in the way of Roberta’s happiness. Of course Renata overhears this final bit. Happy Birthday Renata.

Mañana: Roberta agrees to marry the hot, scruffy guy and Fina tells her if she does marry him the doors to the house and her inheritance will be shut forever.

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