Caray, Caray!

Awww, I like the table of The Ones Who Got Away. I love the idea of our dearly departed sitting around enjoying themselves while all the other characters act like a bunch of monkeys. Great title!!

Novela Maven, you are a wonder. I had the best time reading your recap tonight. I love it when you sound all highbrow as you go for the jugular when describing our characters..."Is he being frisky? Does he have a fungal infection?". Those Gabino scenes were rather amusing in more ways than one. However, I can't say I like Gab and II's idea of post-coital entertainment. I know it's for the cause and all, but that smacking around stuff is just crazy. I think Ingrid is beginning to worry our frisky, fungal philanderer.

Did you catch when Ingrid was talking to Gabino and she said "Yo no tengo un pelo de tonta." The translation is something like "I'm nobody's fool" but considering her pelo is usually exceedingly tonto I couldn't help but burst out laughing.

Thanks Novela Maven! And thank you again for taking care of last night.
 

NovelaMaven - Thank you for another great recap. And the snark-fest continues. Woot!Woot!

Good ole Doc Tovar does love those killer sluts. Gah. His taste in women is awful.

I'm starting a FloRique table, if there is not already one. I say she'll dump Dam and end up with Enrique, by the Por Fin. And only after she lanza preñada- almohadazos toward Alfonsina.

Why am I starting to like Florencia? Methinks the girl is redeemable.

We have to give 'Fifty Shades of Orange' credit for being the best little liar in La Ermita.

"Is he being frisky? Does he have a fungal infection?" .BwaHahahahaaaa!

Gabino striking those goofy poses on the satin sheets with leopard spots and his bikini briefs was even funnier than his gratuitous, gasp-inducing low-rise jeans scene in the habanero field, where only his … ahem … "belt buckle" was holding up the jeans. I definitely saw the top of the Grand Canyon in the back, too.

Cap'n Sylvia - Gabino the phrisky phungal philanderer, indeed. LOL


 

Doris, your spelling for Gabino's descriptors is perfectly phantastic. Gracias.

I'm been warming up to Flor ever since she started making Fina's life uncomfortable. You go girl! ITA that she and Enrique need a table. Those two crazy kids are nuts about each other.
 

NovelaMaven: I always enjoy your recaps but you've outdone yourself with this recap. The picture you painted on the "Patio of Lowered Expectations" was so well done I can picture the scene perfectly in my mind's eye. Beyond clever.

I also liked: "Peaced-out Flor" and like Doris, laughed at :"(Is he being frisky? Does he have a fungal infection?)". But "he and Ingrid set to picking at each other's scabs" was my favorite.

So many interesting scenes last night but Paloma's pathetic lie to Ramona is what stayed with me. Really Paloma?? Ramona's psychic "pregdar" worked with Sabrina but not Paloma. Let's hope Ramona channels her inner abilities and realizes this is just a flat out lie.

And Gael? Getting cringeworthy. Not as cringeworthy as Gab was in those black shorts though. His rolling and lolling about made me nauseous. Count me among the Gabino disenchanted. Yuck...

NovelaMaven, this was simply great.

Diana
 

Dang it, NovelaMaven...that was just brilliant. Loved the tender opening paragraph about those that got away (although a little concerned about Blanca smoking!) and so many gems, among them "Gabino abusing the habañeros",

"the Doc who loved Killer Whores,"

"emotionally tone-deaf Elisa" and...

oh dear, it's embarrassing to be sitting at your computer laughing out loud (and I have a very loud laugh) but good grief!

"Is he being frisky? Does he have a fungal infection?" Well, I laughed until my sides hurt. Lord woman! How do you do it?

I have to say, with my shameful not so secret enjoyment of Gabino,I thoroughly enjoyed that Mr. August writhing on the velvet whatever. Just a hoot of self-parody. At least I hope it was that. Over-the-top (no, not talking about the jeans) Gabino is really the only character who makes this silly show enjoyable for me. He is soooo bad he appeals to my strange sense of humor.
 

Table of The Ones Who Got Away - Oh, NM, that is one of the best, sweetest recap paragraphs ever. Makes you sort of miss all those fine denizens--versus some of the ones we are still stuck with.

PALOMA!!!!!!! WTH??? Well, now this explains how all this gets dragged out--QuiQui will be all sad losing Flo and will fall right into the "I'll make an honest woman of you" trap that Pathetic has now set up. What a convoluted mess. Padre is going to have a nervous breakdown over all these shenanigans knowing what he REALLY knows.

Wow, Alfi - payback is a bitch isn't it? Missed part of that scene, so thanks for filling in what Dam said.

II is beyond nauseating--and frankly, when she gets offed, which forgive me but it better be SOON, she should be banned from the Table of the Ones Who Got Away. Give her mop and bucket--she can clean the patio at night. As for the Doc--someone needs to slap him silly.

Ok - I've said it before, but I think Salvadore just loves to yank our chains and is having a field day with the Gab role. Hands down the best performance in this TN, whether you like the character or no.
 

NovelaMaven- Count me in among those who loved Table of The Ones Who Got Away. Just brilliant!

I'm pretty sure Gab was admiring himself in the mirror above the bed and that's why he was writhing around. I'm pretty sure the Widow Beltran didn't have it there, so Gab had the darn thing installed. Are we surprised?

I have nothing to say about the stupidity of Paloma...

I did enjoy the tender scene between Ricky and Flor. And she's right, when he finds out she's the one who engineered the seduction of his sister, and even planned to kidnap her baby, I just don't see how he'll ever look at her with that same tender gaze.
 

Pure delight, NM! My favorites:

- Modern brujas travel in camionetas

- And maybe Ramona should install a lock on the choza door...
Oh wait. Does it have a door?

- Dam gets the white horse to stand still so he can brush him. But Alfie has less success getting Dam to stand still so she can hug him.

(That last one in particular just cracked me up. She *does* treat him like a prize horsey.)
 

"the Table of the Ones Who Got Away"

Brilliant, NovelaMaven, simply brilliant. What a great way to remind us of the wonderful people we've lost and the contrast with what we've been left with. I especially appreciate the way you've cleaned up and transformed our flawed Augusto. Wire rims, close-cropped salt and pepper hair, twinkling eyes... perfect. Thanks.

Alfonsina may finally become properly focused... Gabina, Ingrid, Carmina... got it? Now go get them.

I'm disappointed in Damián... that put down of Alfy was inappropriate an unwarranted... at least at that precise moment. Would it kill you to go for a ride with your mom?

And Paloma... NOOOO!

Carlos
 

Diana: "pregdar". Snort!!

Oh my word Vivi, it hadn't occurred to me that Gabino was admiring himself in a ceiling mirror, but YES! It all makes sense now.


 

Novela: Great intro - very original.

Gabino looked like he was trying to scratch his back in bed and looked uncomfortable like a kid doing what the director told him to do.

Agreed - Paloma what are you doing, and yes, Damian could have been a little more polite to his own mother, albeit the Alphab***h.
 

NM, thanks for your recaps; I wasn't able to comment on yesterdays. I too loved your table of The Ones Who Got Away.

I was almost speechless at Pal's latest antic, as someone noted yesterday, is she a villain? No, b/c villains aren't that stupid. But messing up QuiQui's life to protect the real babydaddy who about to marry your former BFF? Atrocious!

Ok, Dam had a bad day with Mom but he doesn't know half of the mess she has been pulling on him for his whole life.
 

So what are you guys drinking over at the Paloma table? Hope you've got a lot of it.
 

What we learned last night:

Begona learned she's been replaced.

Elisa learned Carmina owns the Blue House of Shame.

Ramona learned she's going to be a great-gramma.

Paloma learned Ramona is not about to raise another child at her age...she is too d@m# old!

Alfonsina learned Flor & Enrique are still meeting in the park.
 

And welcome back to the reconstituted Horacio table, everyone! Those party favors you see at your place settings are combs. If the Caray galanes can hold him down, the Caray protagonistas will have at his bangs...
 

Combs AND scissors. Horacio's hair is looking worse than ever.
 

I loved your opening statement. What a hoot. I think Ingrid is going to join them next.

What was with Gabino on the bed in his black undies? He kept squirming around and it was making me very uncomfortable. He just kept doing it over and over. Didn't the director see how odd that was before he said 'it's a wrap'?

Paloma saying the baby was Enrique's. I called it. And sweet Enrique will go along with it too.

I think Ingrid wanted to be hit to keep her story of being abused alive with Doc and Gael. Not sure Gabino gets that.
 

What a treat of a recap, starting with the title. I loved the flying nerfazos bit, and of course your clever jabs at the characters.

Thanks for filling in the details, too. I was laughing so hard during the scene where Gabino was squirming like he had worms that I didn't catch anything they were saying.

Ay, Paloma. She is going to give Padre a nervous breakdown.
 

Do you remember the movie The Witches of Eastwick Cathyx? Jack Nicholson had a very funny squirming scene in that one (though he was prone rather than supine)and I kept wondering if the director was doing a take-off on that scene. They do borrow a lot of funny bits from American movies, I've noticed.
 

Judy B, no I haven't seen that movie. Why was he squirming in that movie? But I liked NovelaMaven's take that maybe he had a fungal infection. They're pretty itchy too.
 

Maybe Gabino caught jock itch from Ingrid. Seems like she has been around the block a few times. Maybe that's why she is such a 'witch.'
 

Well, I don't want to gross you out CathyX but I think he was just enjoying himself...all on his own.
 

JudyB - ROFLOL!!!
 

NM, another gem.
LOVED
'Dam gets the white horse to stand still so he can brush him. But Alfie has less success getting Dam to stand still so she can hug him.' and also 'modern witches travel in camionetas'...
Although i loved the way you described it, i have to agree with Carlos and others that his rejection of his mother that rudely was uncalled for and unfair.

LOVED the concept of the tables of 'the ones who got away' from this hot mess...

cathyx,
i think Gabino had a huge mirror installed over his bed and he was just posing for himself while speaking to II... those movements did look like Doris said, like he was having a bad jock itch... but i realized it was him looking at his own image on a overhead mirror.


 

Novela Maven:
What a wonderful intro! I loved it. The table of 'The Ones Who Got Away', indeed. What wonderful imagery.

That's it. You have persuaded me. I am leaving Rational Hall forever and going to hang out on the Patio.My pitching arm has elbow tendonitis from Nerfazo practice. No more trying to make sense of character or 'plot'—they are irrelevant, obviously.

I really can't figure out what Flo has up her sleeve. Maybe the tests from the fertility doc that say she can never have children?

The Doc who loved killer whores is so appropriate for E. Tovar. He is out of his mind. Ingrid? Move in? Really, Edmundo? Because you know her so well and value her character?

Thanks again for the excellent recap, NM.

Elna June
 

"That's it. You have persuaded me. I am leaving Rational Hall forever and going to hang out on the Patio.My pitching arm has elbow tendonitis from Nerfazo practice. No more trying to make sense of character or 'plot'—they are irrelevant, obviously."

Finally, my dear Elna June! To borrow from the late and much lamented Maurice Sendak:

"And now ... let the wild rumpus start!"
 

I am really, really excited about Flor's "surprise," whatever it is. I'm glad she's putting her scheming mind to work for our entertainment.
 

Me too, Blue Lass. Even though it wasn't shown on American tv, I'm pretty sure that in the Mexican version, Flor stopped off at the Patio to hand out invitations.
 

Jijí. I plan to be there, even if it *is* past my bedtime!
 

Judy B, you did gross me out. But if he was doing that because there was a mirror over the bed, that grosses me out even more.
 

Well, I was referring to Jack Nicholson in the movie, Cathyx...I have NO idea what Gabino was doing but it was funny as hell.
 

"Trop bonne poire" my eye, JudyB!

Jejeje
 

Well, I never said I was consistent!
 

It's official, the novela has moved into the theatre of the absurd and is approaching unwatchable!!!! I'm just hanging around for the Patio Parties, the venganza and the snark! We are going to have some fantastic war stories after this one, "You think that's stupid, you should have seen Abismo!" "You think that's pathetic, you should have seen Paloma!"  We'll all be insufferable.  

NM, thanks for the tribute to the La Ermita residents taken before their time, it was touching to remember each of them.  I second what Carlos has  said, thanks  for giving Augusto a makeover, and the vision of him holding Estefania's hand was beautiful.  Lovely thought.....
 

No, JudyB -- no hobgoblins of little minds for you!

But more importantly, what's everyone giving as wedding gifts? Is anyone registered?
 

I'm becoming annoyed with Horacio's coyness. Who is he trying to kid by insisting that he is not a murderer? Does he think that because he didn't intend to kill Blanca (just Lucio) that exonerates him?

He needs to come clean with Alfonsina so we can get this show on the road.

So now Doc Tovar is going to go after Gabino for roughing up Ingrid? Doc, get in line behind Ramona, Lucio, and Alfonsina.

Carlos
 

T-shirt alert:

I'M JUST HERE FOR THE PATIO PARTIES, VENGANZA AND SNARK

(Thanks, Sandy!)
 

I hope that t-shirt is still in stock at Abismart when I get there. I'm afraid there will only be short-sleeve plaid shirts and crocheted short-shorts left. Is there anything else good in the shop these days?
 

I'll take one PP-V-S T-shirt, one pair of short shorts,( cut to the "nether regions") and some fungal ointment, just in case there is an outbreak on the patio!


 

I am very grateful for all of your kind words. Thank you! And it is always fun to read what your clever -- if a tad twisted -- minds come up with here:D

I'm glad you enjoyed the Table of the Ones Who Got Away. I have a confession to make. I find the savage twists of plot of many novelas -- including this one -- nearly unbearable. How can we all sit back and watch the forces of good brought down over and over again while the baddies smirk at us from their Tostacho-stocked kitchens?

Well the answer -- at least for me -- is by an exercise of the imagination which reminds ME that these people are all, in fact, IMAGINARY.

¿ Me explico?
 

I think Abismart should stock Padre Loopy brand squishy stress balls, with the faces of Elisa, Gael, Paloma, and Damian printed on them.
 

May I suggest black sheets, white hats, and horsey accessories (including kevlar girths)?
 

maybe we can find some oversized belt buckles, straw hats with holes in them, of course the flap-flap hand fans, some hand-made 'wear it for love' amulet sets of 2 and habanero jerky pieces.
 

I'm confused. Are we talking wedding gifts or are we just stocking the shelves of Abismart?

... Oh! I get it. They're all REGISTERED at Abismart!
 

Well, I saw that Paloma and Florencia had both registered for one-trick ponies, but I'm not sure we're close enough for that kind of splurge. I'll probably get Dam and Flor a nice framed photo of Italy to remind them of the good old days of their relationship, and I'll get Elisa and Gael a nice framed photo of Italy to suggest to them that they should just get the Hades out of this twisted town.
 

Paloma's is on her baby registry, I mean. I can't bear to look at Elisa and Gael's wedding registry. It's probably all tasteless lingerie.
 

Maybe I'll get Elisa a case of Pedialyte to rehydrate, plus several dozen nice handkerchiefs.
 

JAJAJAJAJAJA Julia you slay me
 

"Maybe I'll get Elisa a case of Pedialyte to rehydrate, plus several dozen nice handkerchiefs."

jajaja! That would work for Paloma too, I'm thinking.

I'd like to give Gael and Flor puppies (nice, good-natured mutts). That might help with their amor no correspondido issues.

For Gael, I'd throw in an empathy belly. But Dam is so hard to shop for ...

.... maybe some cheap glassware that shatters satisfyingly when he realizes he's been had and starts throwing things around.
 

Dam needs a good muscle relaxant.
 

Well ok. But only if you keep him away from walls.
 

Gael might look kinda cute in tasteless lingerie.
 

Wonderful, Emilia! The perfect capper to our wedding registry conversation.

Is it okay if I substitue Gabino for Gael. Still starts with a "G".
 

I'm sure Gabino would love to throw a tasteless lingerie wedding shower for Gael and pick up a few things for himself while he's shopping. He's clearly already familiar with the scanties section of Abismart.
 

I'm planning to purchase some bright yellow briefs for Damian.

For Florencia, a GPS with a pre-set route leading out of La Ermita to Mexico City.

For Elisa and Gael, matching T-Shirts that say "I'm with Stupid."

 

good recaps!!! I like the idea of the shoppe Abismart. and oh the many things that one could buy there. Including livariz, CRE C and T and Conchanacarvenus and Tostachos.
Can't wait for the Flor surprise. I'm beginning to like Flor, cuz I miss Kenia. Now about Horacio. This guy must have a dual personality.He doesnt know the criminal one by saying he is not a killer.
 

Cap'n, we would have to give at least half of the population of La Ermita those tee shirts that say 'I'm with Stupid' or plaid short sleeve one size too small shirts. And of course some knitted shorty shorts for good measure.
 

KNITTED shorty shorts? This just keeps getting better and better.