Friday, September 20, 2013

Episode 39, La Tempestad, 19 September 2013 A Robust Attempt to Identify Ursula

Antes de Hoy

Marina and Catfish talk by the sea. It’s noisy with the waves in the background. MARINA WEEPS that she loves Damian even when he hurts her. Catfish cannot understand why Damian would dump Marina when he was in the Can. Hell, I can’t understand why Damian would dump Marina, period. The Captain has always been an honorable man. MARINA CRIES.

Hernan’s House

An underling, Let’s call him Tan Vest,  \comes in to tell Hernan that his orders have been executed.  Genaro and Aurelia will no longer be a problem for Hernan. I believe that this vague comment means that Tan Vest killed these two even lesser underlings. Ah ha! Now Hernan has silently foiled Ernesto, his secret enemy, again. (Of course, I wonder if there are truly dead or just on a cruise to Barbados). Anyhow, Hernan inquires after the method of the ‘elimination’ and Tan Vest reposts that as Hernan ordered he made it looks as if they have fled in haste. “Perfecto,” chuckles Hernan, only one Rat left. He makes a call on his cell phone and Tan Vest scrapes out of the room on his hands and knees. Really he just disappears.

Bea’s Casa

Tia Becky is bemoaning that she cannot understand just how Damian could act so coldly toward Marina. She feels like a fool for promoting the relationship between Marina and Damian. MARINA SOBS. “Don’t say anything to my Mom”, Marina asks her Aunt. I don’t want it to affect her health. Right on cue, Beatriz enters the room with an ‘I-told-you-so’ look on her face. She hates to see Marina’s pain but she told her Damian was going to make her suffer. However, she knows that DamStupid is no murderer. Marina doesn’t think that Damian is a murderer either, but somehow he played with her heart. Tia Becky, the smartest person in the room by about 20 IQ points, says that she doesn’t think Damian has stopped loving Marina. Damian talked a good game but only (somos hechos) our actions/facts count. Bea says she has learned this in life and looks sad. Later, when Aunt and Niece are by them selves, Marina tells Becky that she gave herself to Damian for love. Tia, who has MUCH more experience of men than Marina, says she is sure that Damian’s intention was not just to get Marina into bed. Tia Becky excuses her self to take a walk. MARINA CRIES.


Madrina Eusebia is visiting Damian. “You know I love you with all my soul”, she says, “But what you killed today was Marina’s heart (feelings)”. Damian, looking appropriately greasy and scruffy in the Vera Cruz lock-up, says that he expected Eusie, all people, to understand his (Idiotic, stupid, ill-advised—Please choose on or more from the previous list) actions. He did this to save Marina from harm; she has already been hurt too much. Next time it will be worse. Eusebia then poses the real question to Damian. (Backstory! The audience knows that Damian has recently been proven to be a jealous and somewhat violent man).  What will you do when you see her with another man???”Don’t even say that,” DAMIAN CRIES. “He doesn’t care if he sees her with another man if she is HAPPY. That’s all he wants for her.” Uh huh.

Eusebia responds with a quote, “The laws of nature say that love is repaid with love (con amor se paga con amor), not lies and pain.” This is meaningful because Eusebia is NEVER WRONG. Damian’s hear t is torn apart he says as he mumbles in a garbled mush mouthed language that vaguely resembles Spanish that this recapper can understand. DAMIAN SOBS.

Beatriz visits Damian in jail. She tells him she does not believe he is a murderer but he is evil because he broke her daughter’s heart. She rags on him and insists that he listen. He is a hypocrite, a bad man, worse than she ever imagined. They say that his Dad was a special man, but he didn’t inherit those qualities. Beatriz says that fortunately for Damian, she will still pray to God that Damian’s innocence will be proven. But stay away from her daughter!

Foreshadowing alert! Damian does not know what Beatriz is capable of. Finally she calls Damian a dirt bag  (rough translation of ‘infeliz’) and leaves. Whew. DAMIAN CRIES SILENT TEARS.

The Mayor’s House- Enter the Bear

Delfina comes in and is weak. She has just been to Eusebia’s house. Eusebia is the shaman of the pueblo. (I thought they would call her a ‘curandera’, rather that a shaman, but I guess her 20-20 fore-vision puts her in a higher class. She’s got real juice, as everyone on the Patio knows). Enter Ursula, the new niece, in sprayed-on jeans and sky-high heels more appropriate for a teenager than a woman of late 30-something.

The Patio

You’ve seen it before—when recappers break bad. It’s not pretty. So when I happened upon the super hot dive known as “The Patio of Lowered Expectations” where the recappers were decompensating in front of my eyes, I couldn’t help but watch and listen and record. Hey, I am a journalist, and the Telenovela Enquirer does not miss a scoop.

The recappers and commenting regulars seemed to all be there, but most of most of them wore some kind of disguise. I saw Grouchos and Yodas, Sleeping Beauty, Vampires, a nostalgic-looking Estercita with rabbit ear headband, a 19th Century Spanish miss with mantilla and hand-painted fan, and several women with plump lips in ratty looking Damian wigs.
Groucho stood up to introduce the night’s guest, Mariana Saone. She was wisely wearing a full body urethane suit, with a rotten-organic-matter repellent cape. As she timidly stand up and waves there is muttering and gnashing of teeth on the Patio. The actress quickly sits down and completes her costume with a beekeepers hat.

The Bar

Candy serves beer and feels sad for Damian. Only a man like Damian would sacrifice his great love to protect the woman he loves. She has to admit, “Damian’s love is a good thing”. Finally, there is something that we can all agree on.

Mayor’s House – Poor Delfina

The tragic figure of Delfina totters down the entry stairs in her perfectly tasteful pale blue shift. Ursula is quick to take her Aunt’s arm in support. Delfina says she has to talk to somebody. Someone whom she completely trusts…Bucket alert. Delfina is about to get DUMPED ON, yet again. Ack. “Of course, Aunt, replies the Bear.”

The Patio

“ I HATE that they introduced this new character now, “ complains Yoda
“Pah, it makes me so angry”. Sleeping Beauty spits out in a deep bass voice.

“ Ratings schmatings!”

“She’s a decent actress”, suggests a bloodied vampire.

“It’s a cheap trick, used just to distract us from the fact that the show has jumped the shark”, the Spanish maiden snaps her fan.

“So what’s with Miss Nasty’s name, Ursula? I haven’t seen that moniker much since 100 Years of Solitude?” asks a Lolo look-alike, complete with horizontal striped shirt.

“¿Quien sabe? responds the fierce looking Pirate with a drooping mustache. “Jose just gave Becky the Book. Do we think it is a clever allusion to the Book?”

“ Clever allusion,” snorts the scholar in the traditional cap and gown. “These bozos wouldn’t recognize a clever allusion if it hit them on the head. This crap is just 30 episodes of filler to keep the lovers apart. Besides Ursula was a heroine and our new character Ursula is not-a-nice girl. Nothing to do with the book, then, Let’s answer Lolo’s question. Why is she ‘Ursula’? What is it about Bears – ursus.” Out come the laptops, smart phones and large reference volumes. These recappers are on their games and came prepared to play.

Delfina’s House, again
Delfina confesses to Ursula that Eusebia has told her that Estercita is alive. She doesn’t want to cling to false hopes but if there is a chance that this is so she will hold on to it. Ursula snaps that Eusebia is a liar, but Delfina corrects her and says that Madre Eusie is the real deal and sees the future. Ursula thinks this is a very delicate matter. She cannot imagine all the goings on in this little town— a shaman who can see the future and Estercita’s husband in jail for murdering her.

Now Ursula looks away from her Aunt and thought bubbles that she has to fine out what is going on in this town and the sooner, the better. I think that means she will get a lot of screen time as she is quickly introduced to all of the town’s main characters.

Mexico City

Mercedes is in a chapel praying to the Virgin. She has a lit candle in her hand. (I love Daniela Romo.) Mercedes reminds the Virgin that she did everything she could to find Magdalena and that both she and Mags deserve to be happy. (Good point, Mercy!)  She knows that she is guilty of causing her daughter’s suffering with the many mistakes she has made, but she dedicates the rest of her life to helping Magdalena heal. This is very sad.

Mercedes goes back to the waiting room and the ODIDF (only Doctor in DF, thank you Mauricio) tells her that Magdalena’s recovery will be slow. Mercedes presence upsets Maggie so it is not convenient (a good idea) for Mercedes to visit. “I am her MOTHER!” cries Mercedes, “Please do not keep me from her side!” The doctor says Mercedes can only see Maggie when she is sedated or when Maggie requests to see her Mom. Mercedes gets to come in and promise to help Mags recover her life. She hopes one day Mags will forgive her and call her Mama. When Mags leaves the room, Magdalena wakes up tears out her IV and says she needs alcohol. A nurse prevents her from leaving the room as she screams and falls apart. Looks like Mags has to detox, poor woman.

She creates quite a kerfuffle in the hospital room. It takes several medical personnel to wrestle her back to bed and get her sedated. Mercedes looks on in horror.

The Houses of Mr. Green Jeans and the Trials of Lazaro

Hernan answers the phone as Macario, who I am already sick of, calls on the phone. His bowl- head black wig has a slight part today and seems a little askew to me. As Ernesto’s paid man-slave, he is following up with Hernan about Genaro’s whereabouts. Hernan reports that he went to Genaros’ house and it appears that Genaro his wife left the house in a great hurry! It seems they were afraid of Comandante Robles prosecuting them.  Macario signs off and tells Hernan that he will pass the message on to Don Ernesto. Hernan did his part. Hernan laughs as he shuts off the phone.

Lazaro comes in to Hernan’s house, a bit late for his appointment with Lara and Valdivia. He says it won’t happen again. Hernan smiles and has Valdivia open an aluminum briefcase full of multi-colored Mexican pesos. It is for Lazaro, for a job well done. Hernan doesn’t like to have tacky looking workers (really, Like Valdivia and Lara are real sharp dressers, Hernan???). Laz can buy a car and some clothes. He is not being just paid for the job he has already done but for the job he will do. It is time for him to prove his loyalty to Hernan and crew. Laz looks very scared. He should be. Hernan tells him that Robles has got to be taken out of the picture. He needs to kill the Federale. Lara hands him a gun.

Laz goes back to his Uncle, Fr. Tomas’ house. His Mom and Tomas ask him to eat but he refuses food. Father Tomas is NOW worried about Laz.

Back in his room Laz cleans and hides the gun and leaves through the open window. Laz finds Jazmin and tells her that Comandante Robles is in danger. He, Lazaro, has been ordered to kill the Federale. Jaz reminds Laz that he is not a murderer, but Laz points out that the bad guys will him if he doesn’t off Robles. Think, Laz, what could you do, since you are already a double agent for the Feds???

Later his uncle, worried about Laz goes with Rosy to talk to Laz and finds him gone. Rosy feels she does not even know her own son. Kneeling on the bed she discovers the (badly hidden) gun.

Fulgencio, Delfina, Mayuya and the Bear

Back at the Mayor’s house, Delfina tells her husband that Estercita may still be alive. Fully asks her what planet she lives on? He berates Delfina and calls her a fool for believing Eusebia’s superstitious nonsense. Eusebia and Damian are just using this idea as a smokescreen to keep Damian from being convicted of murder. Ursula smirks in the corner.

Mayuya comes out with a suitcase and announces that she is leaving the house. Kind (and needy) Delfina tries to get her to stay but Ursula says that Mayuya has her own home. Perhaps she misses her Papa? Ursula still smirks as she practically tosses Mayuya out the door. But Fully intervenes with the news that his word is the LAW in the house and Mayuya stays. Mayuya gives Ursula a triumphant look and Ursula looks real ugly back at her.

The Patio

Fingers flying the recappers research bears. The facts come out: All Bears are from the family Ursidae. Wait, let me remember…Kingdom, phylum, class, order, family, genus, species...Five genera, Eight species.
There are only eight extant species of Bears in the world.
“‘Ailuropoda melanoleuca, that’s the giant Panda. Clearly if we have a Panda on this show it is Lolo. Cute as a button and doesn’t eat people. Our Ursula is a man-eater if I ever saw one,” growls the Pirate.

“Tremarctinae is the Andean or Spectacled Bear. Nope, our Ursula does not wear glasses.”
“Do contacts count?” says the Spanish Maiden.
“No,” says the no-nonsense scholar. “That’s a rule out.”
But Sleeping Beauty may be onto something…

Mexico City

Mercedes is undone after seeing Magdalena’s violent withdrawal symptoms. Alicia comforts her and Mercedes again swears to stay with Magdalena and view her suffering as the price she has to pay to regain her daughter. Well, yeah, Mercedes. I would say so. Just then Marina calls on Mercedes’ cell phone and Mercedes listens as Marina cries her heart out about Damian. He played with her heart and dumped her. Mercedes apologizes that she is held up in Mexico City but she instructs Marina to stay calm and to break up their partnership with Hernan right away. Mercy tells Marina that she will be there to help Marina ASAP. She promises. Then she wonders to Alicia why she cannot split herself in half to help both of her daughters at the same time.

Tia Tiberona Shows Some Serious Teeth

At the bar, Tia Becky stops Candy and insists that candy come clean about Damian’s motives for breaking up with Marina. Tia warns that she will dig up the true story! Candy doesn’t want to betray Damian but she feels that he and Marina should not break up. Candy swears Tia Becky to absolute secrecy. Becky gives her word to keep the secret Candy is about to tell her. The break-up is a plan by Damian to protect Marian from the rotten people of Nuestra Señora del Mar. She has been hurt enough already.

Tia Becky just knew there was something hidden. She is going to rush off to tell Marina but Candy pulls her back and reminds her of her solemn promise. Damian cannot protect Marina from inside the jail.

Hernan and the Upright Water Feature

Hernan calls Bea’s house and asks for Marina. Bea won’t give Marina the phone but she blabs all about Damian dumping Marina to Hernan because, “He is a very good friend of the family.” Bea, you know that Hernie tried to get you to lie to and deceive your own daughter but you still consider him a close friend of the family??? We have to face it, my friends; Bea has a major crush on the Hernanator.

Later Hernan drops by Bea’s house to comfort Marina. He is her friend, her confidant; she has his shoulder to cry on. MARINA CRIES, but says she is tired of crying. Marina says they need to talk about something else. She drops the bomb. By the order of Sra Mercedes Hernan is being ousted as a partner. He’ll get his money back but he will have nothing to do with the Neptune fish packing plant. Nothing!!! Marina reiterates that this was not her decision but Mercedes’. Hernan reminds Marina that there is a clause in the contract specifying that it cannot be broken for three months after it is signed. They are at an impasse.

Laz Comes Home

Laz comes in the house and is immediately subjected to the third degree interrogation technique by Father Tomas and his mom Rosario. What is this gun? It is for work. All drivers are issued a gun because they move merchandise in dangerous places. He has never used it. He takes the gun and, pleading tiredness, goes to bed.

Later he comes to his Uncle, crying and says he needs his help. Laz is afraid that if Father Tomas helps him it will put the good priest’s life in danger. Laz cries. WE are going to talk now!

Laz confesses all to his uncle, Father Tomas, under the seal of the confession. He has been asked to kill a man and it is either he or I! Tomas tells him that Laz must get out of the organization, but Laz says that C. Robles wants Laz to discover the head of the trafficking organization. And he is still trying to help Jazmin and her sister! What a mess!

But a plan is in the making. In a very jagged edit we now see our favorite Federale in conversation with Lazaro at the priest’s home. Laz tells Comandante Robles that he has been ordered to kill Robles! But Robles and Father Tomas have cooked up a plan. I do not know how this fits in with the seal of the confessional, but it is too late at night for me to get too technical with our little show. Robles orders Laz to keep the appointment! Laz must meet Robles out of town and shoot him; otherwise the bad guys will kill Laz himself. Roble has a plan for this to all work out. Robles leaves the priest’s house by the back door.


Damian looks really beaten down as he asks an invisible Marina to forgive him .He is very confused. First he says that he doesn’t know if he can go on without her, then he says that all that matters is that she is happy and that nobody will hurt her. Flashbacks to Damian and Marina kissing. DAMIAN CRIES.

The Battle Between the Bear and the Cobra

Mayuya and Ursula have it out. While Mayuya gloats that she is staying in the house, Ursula throws her out of Estercita’s room. It’s Ursula’s room now.  Ursula has the photos of Fully kissing Mayuya. And, as Mayuya is staying in the Mayor’s house, she will be Ursula’s personal slave.

The Patio Cheers and Ursula is Identified

The recapper known as Sleeping Beauty is reading from her iPad. “OK, guys. Ursinae is the last Bear sub-family. Let’s see Asiatic Black Bear, no, I don’t see it. Sun Bear, Black Bear, ahhh”... “Wait! yells Yoda. I got it. I got it. I got it. Here she is, Ursus (artos) horribilis, the Brown or Grizzly Bear. Our Ursulsa is Ursus Horribilis, top of the food chain, the most notorious specimen of the Mean Girl.” The Patio erupts in cheers. The recappers have a new ‘tag’ for the beast Ursula.

And there you have it, folks. Those recappers broke bad on us and you heard it here first. It is not everyday you get to see the inner workings of the recapping team at La Tempestad, especially when they are grouchy at recent plot developments. The Telenovela Enquirer has scooped the competition with the up-to-the-minute nickname for the new La Tempestad antagonista, Ursula.


Fulgencio sits in his official Mayor’s office and floats that he will finally have revenge on Michel Fabre. Today the trial starts and Fulgencio will hurt Michel’s little son, Damian. He will no longer be a hero.

Trial Prep

Mercedes and Jose skype about the trial. Mercedes has total faith in Jose because he is a very competent lawyer. And driver. And security guard. And kisser. Okay, then. But he is facing corrupt vultures in Rrr-Lay-Dee. He is to keep her totally informed about the progress of the trial. Alicia comes in with a report from the investigation into the boat explosion. The divers have confirmed that this is the evidence that proves that Damian is innocent!

The plaza outside the courthouse is full of loud and unruly people. Marina and Hernan have another talk in the midst of this chaos. I guess she is going to the trial. She tells Hernan that she is not finished with their previous conversation about dissolving the business partnership in the Neptune Fish Co. Fulgencio drives up, the doors open to the courtroom and the people pour in. Marina tries to talk to Fully but he ignores her.

Jose assures Damian that the judge is a good guy and the jury has not been suborned. Damian needs a shower and some clean clothes. The wig could use a rinse out as well. When Damian asks after Marina Jose says that he cannot understand how Damian could hurt Marina like this. Lara and Valdivia come and take Damian to trial.

Filed by Elna June


My confirmation name was Ursula. I had looked up the meaning of the name years ago, a,nd I believe in Latin, it means "defender of men". So there!
Again, I LOVE the recaps.

Oops! My mistake! My first name means defender of mankind. My middle name means little she bear, but Ursula has a very tragic history:
Mil disculpas!!!


Marvelous, stunning recap! I liked the Ursula meanings and the Patio breaking bad, ; )

Poor Laz. I thought Herny was really smart, but now, not so much. He sends a green behind the ears guy to "off" the Commandante, hoping he'd be caught, but instead sends a really smart guy, who does the right thing in spilling the frijoles. I'm glad Laz told Padre Tomas what was going on, even in the confessional. I don't think the Padre broke the seal of the confessional, but probably gave Laz good advice, hence the Commandante and the little pow wow.

I'm so glad Mercy wants Herny out of Neptuno, but it will be a long haul to get him out. Just when he thought he was IN, Mercy is trying to kick him out. I feel so bad for Mercy, first finding Mags and really trying to help her, and then Marina with a broken heart. I really can see why she said she wishes there were two of her, so one could be with Mags and the other with Marina.

Ursula sure likes to stir up trouble. I wonder what she would do if Ester came back? And Maycucu is now in the servant's quarters. I'm was really surprised that Fully wanted her to stay. I guess he likes his little side pastry.

Bea is getting on my last nerve. "Friend of the Family", indeed! Mercy warned her about Herny, did she listen, were her ears blocked with wax? I too think she has a thingy for the Hernanator (good one EJ)!

I can't wait to see Jose in action in the courtroom, especially when Fully's henchies (and we know this is a sham trial) come up with this "evidence".

Yay EJ! It's great to have you and your tropes back on the patio. I enjoyed your fun with Ursula, a robust attempt to identify her, and all forms of bear. You are brilliant my dear! (My mother's name was Ursula.)

Thank you writers for having Laz go directly to Padre T and spill the beans. I think that is very in character for Laz and, frankly, makes the plot progression more interesting.

I was hoping that Tia Tiburona would hook up with Candy to figure out the truth. Tia T is the type to spring into action while Candy tends to wring her hands.

EJ thank you for the great read. Your recaps are always so juicy! Hard to say what gave me the biggest laugh, but it might have been "The Houses of Mr. Green Jeans and the Trials of Lazaro". Or maybe "Hernan and the Upright Water Feature". THANK YOU amiga! Love your recaps.

Wow, Elna June, what a great recap. Your recaps are always fascinating and extremely entertaining.

In the courtroom, I was expecting some sort of chemical reaction or at least mild electrical activity when Hernán gently touched Eusebia's back. I thought that she had a nose for evil. She didn't flinch or even look back at him. Maybe she had her sensors turned off.


Great recap dear EJ! You are right, Bea is blinded by Herny's creepy charms.

Ursula/Shursula, as long as she does not sleep with uncle Fully. We have enough of ICK alert with pervert Ernesto. I am actually glad Fully keeps a spare tire Maycucu in the house. It means Ursula is safe from his nasty grabby hands.

Whoever is responsible for costumes on the show must hate His Hotness. That person succeeded in transforming this gorgeous, gorgeous, breathtaking WWP man into a stinky, greasy, wrinkled, unkempt, middle-aged mentally ill hobo with involuntary crying spells. Shame on you!

Off to rewatch the happy WHITE! WET! PANTS! times and sexy cave of love. I need to erase DamnGulagInmate from my mind.


Damgood recap Elna june.

I feel like Mercy and Tia Becky are the only smart ones. I sense the relationship between Mercy and Mags is going to be rough. I hope it turns out well.

"Mercedes has total faith in Jose because he is a very competent lawyer. And driver. And security guard. And kisser." Best quote of the post. Hope is gets paid for all the work he is doing because he is literally doing the job of more than one person. I wonder what his job title is when he applied to work for Mercy?

EJ- I avoided this episode because I knew it would be lots of crying. I'll watch my recording later, when I can fast-forward through those parts. :)

Your recap, though, was not to be missed. Just brilliant!

Vita- Your comment on El Bello Mas Feo, aka Damian, was hilarious! Thanks for making me laugh. :)

"Damian needs a shower and some clean clothes. The wig could use a rinse out as well."

I am quite sure, however, that our reporter, Dr. Elna June, is sporting a freshly pressed linen dress, in a moss green that shows off her perfectly coiffed auburn locks to advantage. Coincidence that the dress echoes Mr. Green Jeans' wardrobe today? Let the Rogue Recappers and Crazed Commenters decide.

While I usually disapprove of reporters making themselves part of the story, Tía Tiburona is not the only one showing serious teeth here. So does the TELENOVELA ENQUIRER.

Which reminds me -- nice use of EMPHATIC capitalization. Way to coax the cranky Patio along a THEMATIC PATH.

And the Ursine scholarship is impressive. I was the one in the corner dressed like a crab and I was advocating for the Disney Sea Witch origin of Ursula, but I was drowned out by drunken shouts of "DA BEARS!!!" Ah well, ursus horribilis it is.

She was wearing "a full body urethane suit, with a rotten-organic-matter repellent cape."

May I tell you how much I enjoyed parsing the second part of this phrase? Still, Ms Seoane need not have worried. The Patio has always been and will always be a NERFAZO-only zone. Tomatazos are only permitted if they are NERFAZOS.

This was such a joy to read! Thank you, my brilliant friend, for hanging out with us!



"Ursula/Shursula, as long as she does not sleep with uncle Fully"

Aren't you a little worried that Ursula's Funny Uncle may wander into the wrong room at night? After all, at this point only the COBRA and the GRIZZLY know about the room switch...


"I don't think the Padre broke the seal of the confessional, but probably gave Laz good advice, hence the Commandante and the little pow wow."

Yes, great point! I never thought of that!

[I was too stuck on comparing the two promises of silence -- the other one being the one made by the tía to her friend Candy. I'm not worried though: madre Eusebia not only KNOWS things, she tends to TELL things. How long before she takes Marina aside and sets her straight?]


Even if Perversio-the-Uncle (I vomited a bit) pries his daughter's bedroom door open to pleasure his overused rusty knife with Maycucu... Ursula would hand him googlemaps directions to the snake's quarters. She is not interested.

This is my first time watching Mexican TN (because of the gorgeous WL my patio friends, because of His Hotness).

Sometimes I wonder if I am watching Jerry Springer's show, with all the incest/pervert/ plot lines. Yuk! Double Yuk on Uncle/niece sexual attraction.

Oh God, so sorry. NovelaMaven, not Maiden.

I am so glad you came to hang out today. Sandydoc, I would be proud to have the name 'Ursula', being a fan, in general, of bears. In looking for a nickname for the new character Ursula that flew into town on a broom and arrived with a slap, all I could think of was 'ursus horribilis'. I decided to work it into the recap. I am so glad I did not offend either you or Sylvia with the reference. Truth be told, I am a bear geek—I read all I can find about bears, their habitat, behavior and patterns. My next dream vacation is to Yellowstone to do one of the Bear and Wolf programs with a Yosemite wildlife biologist.

Mads: So glad you liked the recap. As I was reading the last few days' comments I was struck by how cranky I was getting with the plot. When JudyB threatened to take a sulk break yesterday, I thought that the denizens of the Patio were about to 'break bad', myself included.

I think that Mercedes is in for a load of life storms. Now that she has discovered Mags, I suspect Magdalena will give her living hell. In addition to her chemical dependency, she will have deep psychological wounds as well.

Hi, Sylvia: Thanks for dropping by.I know how busy you are and I am always grateful for your comments.

Carlos: Thank for the kind word. My DVR cuts off on the hour so I did not see Hernie touch Eusie. I am surprised she did not turn him into a toad.

Vita: You are so funny about His Hotness! How did they make Wm Levy look so terrible? Great makeup and wardrobe if you like the hobo vibe.

Caroline: I too wonder about how Jose came to be with Mercedes....Thanks for coming by.

Vivi: So glad you enjoyed the recap. As we have discussed before, the crying episodes are very annoying to me; hence my use of the all caps shout to identify the crying scenes.

As you watch the epi I wouldn't miss Tia Becky's little encounter with Candy. Nora gets to show off her acting chops a bit and she is very menacing. I think she would eat the street-wise Candy as a breakfast snack if she were so inclined. Of course, being BFFs, that will never happen.


No worries, Vita -- I've been called worse things. :)

But remember -- Fulgencio isn't a blood relative of Ursula. Delfina and Ursula's mami are sisters. Soooooo ...

Still pretty icky though.

Novela Maven (Maiden, hee,hee):
Thank you for your comments, amiga. You know that I play fast and loose with the role of recapper, it is a bad habit of mine.

Also, I appreciate the reminder about the Nerfazos. Maybe I can order some from the Storm Cellar store to throw at Ursula. I can tell they are going to make this character so over the top. I like the 'Disney Sea Witch', that works for me.

As to Eusie, I think she rather enjoys her role as town oracle. She will surely spill the frijoles to Marina sooner or later.

And I am with Vita on the Uncle/Niece incest suggestion. What if he does wander into the wrong room? Yuk!



I offer a belated apology for the atrocious (non)editing jobs I do on all of my recaps. I have lost my ability to edit myself as I write. It is so sad. When I reread my recaps they are filled with errors in punctuation, grammar and much more. If I post right away (late at night) I cannot even recognize the errors until the next day.

Alas, I am too lazy to correct them the next morning.

Lo siento.




Please don't apologize for grammer and spelling errors. I too am very guilty of this! And sometimes I don't correct mine either. Your brilliance far surpasses the errors, amiga! You are a gem.

Thanks, EJ, for that fun recap.

I feel for poor DamGrungy because I love to have a shower every day and it has been awhile since he's been able to clean bimself up.

Jose is my kind of hombre..responsible, loyal, intelligent...a man for all seasons. ...and a good kisser.

Finally, I hope that all of you are enjoying a clear, sunny day like we are having here, and did everyone notice that big full moon last night ???


Yes, I noticed the moon and thought, sorry for the earworm, "Shine on, shine on Harvest Moon", ; )

A hairy hand
Uncle Fully creeps through the night
Knock, knock. Are you in bed?

Elna June:

As Mads says, No te preocupes. Still, I know how you feel about seeing typos in the light of day -- it's kind of like looking in the mirror and realizing you've been grinning at people all evening with a piece of moss green spinach between your front teeth. [But you are so classy, you would make the spinach look like a fashion accessory; soon everyone on the Patio would be clamoring for green acrylic tooth embellishments.]


Guau! You have transformed HORROR into ART!

Elna June - Muchas gracias. Enjoyed the sleuthing out of "Ursula." My favorites:

“when recappers break bad”

“several women with plump lips in ratty looking Damian wigs”

"Bucket alert. Delfina is about to get DUMPED ON"

Nice to see Laz can think on his feet. I thought that was a pretty good lie about all the drivers being issued guns for security. Though I'm glad he had the good sense to tell the Padre the truth.

Sorry the cast and crew have to deal with the humidity, but I do love that the TN is shot on location. Bea's back was soaked in sweat as she gave Damian what-fer in the jail.

I got a kick out of Mercedes and Jose doing FaceTime on their IPads. My daughter in Toronto and I FaceTime a lot. It is so fun to actually see the person you are talking to. It reminds me of the GE Carousel of Progress at DisneyWorld Tomorrowland. This novela is really proud of its technology. Who would have dreamed of IPads and IPods ten years ago, and what will we have in ten more years.


Earworm, no! I can't stop singing, "Shine on, harvest moon..."

Niecie: I am glad you enjoyed the recap. Like you, I love the location shots. The Mexican travelogue is a bit part of my enjoying the TNs. I guess it was REALLY hot when they filmed this, wasn't it? Our old friend Jarocha could probably tell us something about the weather in Veracruz. One thing I always notice is that the sea looks really rough.

Vita: Could not agree with NM more; your poem is wonderfully evocative and an absolute horror show. I am going to have bad dreams about Fully's hairy hand reaching around the door...Ooooo, worthy of Halloween.

NM: You are seer, NM, just like Madre Eusebia. How else would you know about the arugula canine tooth cap I just discovered I have been wearing all morning? Thank you for the o-so-kind and hilarious thoughts. I may have to change my Avatar for the blog to a Jack-O-Lantern with one tooth covered in locally grown, bio-appropriate and organic espinacas.

Hugs and giggles to all,


Elna June: Delightful, informative and witty recap. I so look forward to reading what you have to say. You consistently provide amazing summaries.

"Tan Vest scrapes out of the room on his hands and knees. Really he just disappears","Bea has a major crush on the Hernanator and "several women with plump lips in ratty looking Damian wigs" made me smile in pure enjoyment.

Poor Laz. Talk about being totally out of your league.

Gone was the tearful, inconsolable Marina at the trial. She was calm and determined. She found her strength and resolve and seems utterly focused. Dam however seemed beside himself...Let's hope this sham of a trial comes to a close quickly. Hopefully with the reappearance of a better dressed but infinitely more world weary Ester...

Wonderful comments all.

Thanks again Elna June!



Did you catch that Mercedes has a Louis Vuitton iPad cover? Could be a knock-off but it looks like the real thing. Anita will have to get permission to sell LV in the Storm Cellar Boutique. Then we, too, can enjoy an LV iPad cover for a mere $790.00 US, plus tax.

On another note, I just love how most of the women on La Tempestad dress. Marina, Tia Becky, poor Delfina, Beatriz, and especially Mercedes.

Regards the men, Fulgencio looks good in his middle-aged-spread clothes (I feel for him ,man) and Hernan, well I just swoon aver anything Ivan Sanchez does or wears. Ahem, I even like the green jeans. (EJ ducks tomato Nerfazos thrown her way.)

When it comes to Damian, his wardrobe is best left to a bare minimum. As the Irish girls say, "There's nothing wrong with a bit of the rough..." but a shower and some soap would be nice.


Grrrreat EJ!!!!

I hope the bad wig goes soon, I know it does at some point. In fact there are 2 bad wigs that need to go.

It was Mayuya that came onto Fully & he was a little surprised but of course couldn't turn that down. Unless Ursula does the same thing I doubt Fully would take advantage. But I am ALWAYS wrong.

A little cárcel realism for our hunkísimo. But don't the prisoners clean up before going to trial?

I thought we moved from the patio to the cellar over at Vicente's place in Santa Diabla.

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Elna June, I so enjoyed your recap and your ability to send us to another dimension, i.e. the Patio. You add that extra layer of action and reaction. You are akin to Eusebia--a shaman who sees all and tells us what we need to know. You added spice and fun to my Friday.

Kind patio ladies,

I SAW the TRUE horror.

Aged overnight
Slobbering stinky inmate
Oy vey! Sexy no more

Elna June,

I love the idea of Eusebia zapping Hernán into a toad but I wonder if that might interfere with her nomination to sainthood. Maybe better if she chose something cuddly like a little bunny rabbit or a hamster.


Or... wait for it...a fiddler crab.

Not cuddly but fitting.


EJ, Funny recap and I always enjoy the talk about the patio peeps. I don't have time to watch all the time, so I sure enjoy this group of recappers.

Whoever said WL is looking like he needs a bath, I agree, wholeheartedly and would add - a good night's sleep. I wonder is WL stayed up all night before he shot those scenes.

Whoever is the buyer for the Storm Cellar Boutique, I think it is time for a few additions to the inventory:

straw panama hats for Fully afficionados

flimsy play police badges for kids to play "pretend-cop"

inexpensive snorkels and masks for "Sea-I" forensic sleuths (since half the criminal activities seem to occur underwater). Can serve double duty to search for Esthercita's missing engagement band, or to get a job scraping barnacles from the various boats.

paperback copies of "100 Years of Solitude" with free bookmarks autographed by "Jose" with his personal advice from the heart.



Thanks EJ, funny and fun recap, for such a sad episode. I say sad, because besides the tears, those old screeching women are giving me a headache. The over the top, over-reacting of these folks has me looking for the FF.

Marina - her "true nature" in the character, would not let Herny get in her space like he does. He's always touching her and it's disrespectful to Marina and of course Damian. When is she going to say - no me toque? I also thought for sure Eusebia would flinch at his touch. They missed an important detail on that one.

Marea Primavera

Carlos, I'll go with fiddler crab. I think Eusebia might even be able to use the act of transformation as one of the several verified miracles necessary for her to be canonized.

Of course, Buddhists would just say that Hernie's actions will catch up with him. We know for sure that he will soon be born into a much less fortunate human life. A fiddler crab may be just the ticket.



Elna June, this was so good and soooo funny. I liked, "Mercedes and Jose skype about the trial. Mercedes has total faith in Jose because he is a very competent lawyer. And driver. And security guard. And kisser. Okay, then." But there were so many good parts!
I am not sure I understand the patio. Are we all on the patio?

EJ, this was so great:-), I love the breaking badness of us on the patio, and Emarie, I am not sure I understand the patio either, but in my mind, we are all on the patio, enjoying this together. Now, if I find out that there is a real, as in tangible/touchable patio that you all are hanging out on! I will want to know the address!!!
BTW, I enjoyed the recap more than the show.., it's not uncommon ! Ana

EJ, this was so great:-), I love the breaking badness of us on the patio, and Emarie, I am not sure I understand the patio either, but in my mind, we are all on the patio, enjoying this together. Now, if I find out that there is a real, as in tangible/touchable patio that you all are hanging out on! I will want to know the address!!!
BTW, I enjoyed the recap more than the show.., it's not uncommon ! Ana

EJ, you would not have insulted me at all if you had snarked on the name Ursula. Truth be told my mother never cared for her first name, so she went by her middle name, Imogene. Go figure. Off Topic regarding my busy-ness - If those DamSailors would just FINISH THEIR DAMREGATTA I would have more time. Even the tireless Kiwi tourists are ready to pack it in.

By they way, I couldn't care less about grammatical errors and such. As far as I can recall you have never violated an apostrophe, so we are good.

Carlos, how observant of you to notice that Eusebia didn't even flinch when Herny touched her. Maybe she needs to look into his eyes to see the tortured evil within. And fiddler crab? Brilliant!!

Ah yes, last night's moon was magical. Mads, that song isn't such a bad earworm.

Vita, you are DamFunny with your most excellent haikus.

Emarie and Ana, yes we are all on the Patio of Lowered Expectations. Novela Maiden, er Maven, built it. Anita tends bar. It is our virtual hangout where we watch telenovelas, heckle the characters, misbehave, and throw nerfazos (nerfie things) at stupid characters.

EJ sorry for posting late but I must compliment you on your work. This was great! And your fascination w/bears is fun as my younger sister is also fond of bears. Hope you and yours are well.

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