Caray, Caray!

Diana breaks off the non-gay-non-cousin liplock, in case Alonso comes back.  Alonso, hiding out in the broom closet with Alberto, is furious.

Diego assumes that Diana left the test results on purpose, and is pissed that she'd decide to tell him something so important this way.  He storms out of the office with Irene hot on his heels.

The "session" continues, but Alonso isn't kicking them out yet.

Lupita admits to her mom that she lied so good, the class wants her cop daddy to come to show-and-tell.

Cop Daddy is getting a promotion to head of Homicide. Ummm…Eleazar…please don't bring homicide stuff to show-and-tell!

Diego shows up just after Diana and Sexter leave, but he leaves without stopping to talk to Alonso and Alberto.  Alonso calls him while he's in the car, but Diego is hell bent on confronting Diana about the pregnancy test.  The Als are worried, thinking maybe Diego figured out the truth about Oliverio on his own.

Carmen tries to, uh, find Lupita another fake daddy, but Lupita's not having it.  She wants her original fake daddy.  As distressed as Carmen is, she looks like she's trying not to laugh.

Diego confirms with the lab that the tests really were done there.

Eleazar tells his crew that he's now going to be the head of the Homicide division…and he can take them with him, if they want to go.  Jackie decides it's time for her to go back to being a federal officer, as much as she likes these guys.  Eleazar gets a call from Carmen, inviting him to dinner at the fonda and the entire crew gape at him.  They don't believe him when he says it was his mom inviting him to dinner.

Diego comes home, shouting for Diana, but Lala tells him she's been out since early.

She's busy fighting under the blankets with Oliverio.  Until Diego calls.  She doesn't answer, but when she goes back to her illicit extramarital activities, she nearly…well, there's just no way to put this delicately…pukes in Oliverio's mouth.  She won't tell him what's wrong and he mocks her, saying she'd better not be pregnant.   Diana denies she is, but she can barely collect her clothes and get out of the room without continuing to gag.

Irene's worried about Diego.  She thinks a baby is a blessing, even if it means he's shackled to Diana.  He's really confused, since they haven't slept together in a while.  He's worried about how Natalia's going to take it.

The Als have drinks.  Alonso is now convinced that the "suicide attempt" was full of ""s.  They decide to sit Diego down at Alonso's place, give him a drink, and tell him what's going on.

Diana gets home and when Diego confronts her about being pregnant and finding the test results hiding in the middle of his papers, she tells him that she took the test to show Natalia, to convince her to stay away from him.  So now, this is all Natalia's fault because Natalia ruined the surprise and Diana was SO excited about telling Diego herself, woe is Diana.  When she asks if he's happy that they're having a baby, Diego reminds her that he didn't want to have kids.  "Well, there's nothing we can do about it now."  Poor kid.

Upstairs, Diana stops in to tell Grumps that he's going to be a Great Grumps.  He's thrilled.  Diana tells him that Diego isn't happy, probably because of "that woman."  Grumps insists they won't get divorced now, and he'll take care of it.  The idea of a great-grandchild has given Grumps a new lease on life.

Diego drives off in a huff and heads back to the office.  He asks Natalia about the visit from Diana.  She says that she didn't believe the test results were real and, no, she didn't slip them in the middle of his papers, she threw them away.  Diego says they were real.  "Then it's not yours.  It must be that guy Oliverio's.  I saw them kissing."

Back at Alonso's the guys and Eleazar are arriving at the same time.  He offers to give back the booze he took off Alonso's hands the other day, but they explain they're just giving a "friend" a few drinks before they tell him his wife's been cheating on him.  Alonso hisses at Alberto that he was about to tell Eleazar who the "friend" was…"What?  They know each other."  "Yeah, but it's not like being cheated on is something to brag about!"

Grumps asks Lala for a bottle of champagne.  He brags to her about having a great-grandchild on the way, and calls for Irene.  She's not as thrilled as Grumps would like and gives Diana a token congratulations.

Diego is still convinced that Oliverio is Diana's gay cousin and that whatever else her faults are, Diana is faithful.  He swears he's going to get divorced anyway and he'll still take responsibility for his child.  Natalia is pissed on behalf of all women who end up raising their children alone.  And as far as she's concerned, divorcing the child's mother is the same thing.  She runs out of the office and ends up being offered a ride by Tad when he notices how upset she is.

Diego gets the call from the Als and gets ready to head right over.  Irene calls as he's leaving and offers to do what she can with Natalia.

Tad takes Natalia home and gives her a pep talk about staying strong.  Irene shows up and it's a family reunion!

The guys aren't sure if Diego knows the truth or not and whether they should show him the video.  Diego shows up and tells the guys he's lost Natalia and Diana is pregnant.  They get him a drink as he tells them how he found out.  Alberto gives Alonso a look and Alonso shuts the laptop.

Since Natalia will be in good hands with Irene, Tad leaves them.  Natalia tells Irene that Diego's having a baby and he shouldn't abandon him.

The Als are not in agreement about showing Diego the video, but it seems that Alonso has the decisive vote and for now, it's "no."

Natalia is convinced that if Diego gets divorced, he'll abandon his child.  Irene says he wouldn't do that, and he can't stay with Diana because he doesn't love her.  Natalia asks if Irene knows about Diana's lover.  She says that not only is she sure Diana has one, but Diana tried to blackmail her to keep her mouth shut.  "It's her cousin, the guy who pretends to be gay."

Eleazar shows up at the fonda…after hours…*wink, wink*.  Carmen made him his favorite dish.  He notices the table is set for three and Lupita comes in.

Irene's upset that Oliverio fooled them all.  "I knew there was something about him I didn't like!"  Natalia says she's done.  She tried to tell Diego, he didn't want to believe her, and she's not going to tell him again.  "Well, I will!"  Irene says the baby might not even be his.  "But what if it is?  He can't abandon him!  Family is the most important thing there is."  Speaking of which, Natalia's siblings (minus Lupita) show up and invite Irene to stay for dinner…quesadillas!

Eleazar makes small talk with Lupita.  She tells him that as soon as her mom says what she needs to say, she'll be going home to get to bed, 'cause school starts early.  Carmen fumbles a bit, so Lupita takes the reins…"Could you be my dad for a day?  At school they gave us an assignment to write about our family and since I don’t have a dad, mom told me to use my imagination…so I imagined you."  Eleazar asks what exactly pretending to be her dad entails.  Carmen thinks he's going to say "no," but Eleazar says of course he'll pretend to be her dad.  "Anyone would be proud to be your dad.  What's going to be tough, though, is pretending to be married to your mom."  "Naw, it'll totally be easy.  My mom likes you a lot and she says you've known each other since you were little.  You could pass as a couple…now come stand over here and hug her so I can see how you look together!"  Ah, Lupita…so young, so diabolical…I like this kid!  Eleazar is ready to dive right into practice, but Carmen's going to need some work.

Paolo cooked some awesome quesadillas.  Irene wants to see Brigitte's design work, but not just now.  After she leaves, Brigitte nervously asks why Irene would be interested in seeing her work…then she gets nervous about the prospect of having to pick what to show her.  She wants Natalia's help putting together her portfolio, but Natalia says she's really not in the mood and it's been a long day.

Diego ends up asleep on Alonso's couch.  Irene calls him, so Alonso picks up the phone and explains that Diego really can't talk.  He invites her over so they can decide whether it's a good idea to wake Diego up or not.  Toss the booze first, boys!

Eleazar really wants to get into character as Carmen's husband, but she reminds him that the whole point is to talk about his work as a cop.  Eleazar makes a deal with Lupita that since he's doing her this favor, she has to be top of her class this year.

Alberto wonders if they should tell Irene what they found out.  She shows up and before she can wake him up, they ask what she wanted to tell him.  "Well, you're going to find out anyway…Natalia told me that she saw Diana kissing Oliverio…."  "Oh!  So she knows too!"  Um…too?  Alberto tells her they both know AND they have evidence.  Alonso says that Diego was so distraught about the pregnancy that he didn't think it was a good idea to tell him.  The Als and Irene head for Alonso's bedroom to view the evidence.

Carmen and Lupita get home and hear about Irene's visit.  Carmen is suspicious of Irene's motives and tells Brigitte to get down off her cloud until they know more.

Eleazar goes over to Luz's and messes with her a bit, saying he's going to be a daddy!  He explains about Lupita's assignment and going to her class to talk about his work.  Luz says she never would have thought there could be anything between Eleazar and Carmen.  "You two are more like siblings."  Party pooper!

Carmen goes in to see how Natalia's doing and ask about Irene's visit.  Carmen says she's worried because she's still suspicious of Diego and she doesn't like Natalia being so close with his family.  She grouses a bit about the whole house singing Irene's praises.  Natalia  laughingly accuses her mom of being jealous and Carmen laughs it off as well.  As they hug, though, Carmen's got her worried face on.

The Als and Irene watch the video.  Irene's pissed that Diana brought him over to the house and lied to them all.  She says they'll definitely show Diego the video, but not in his current state.  She asks Alonso if Diego can spend the night.  She'll come back in the morning to talk to him.

Diana calls Karina to gossip with her, but Karina doesn't seem interested.  She brags about having Vicente on her side.  Karina loses it and yells at Diana for not caring about how she's doing.  Diana can't even pretend to care for longer than it takes to ask "Fine, how are you doing?" and hear the answer.  "Mhm…ok…but what do you think about my news?"  Karina says she ain't got time for that and hangs up on Diana.

The next morning, Diego wakes up on Alonso's couch and apologizes for being sooooo drunk the night before.  Irene pops in from the kitchen with a cup of coffee for him.  Alberto comes into the living room and now Diego knows something is up.  "You need to see something, and you're not going to like it."

Tomorrow: Diego is SO getting divorced; Diego is SO getting back together with Natalia; Diego is SO going to freak when RODRIGO comes out of his coma!

Labels: te-quiero