Tuesday, January 13, 2015
La Gata #94 01/12/15 Where's Maury when you need him?
I used to be a happy girl, but this show has broken my spirit, its gotten so bad that I can't really seem to make out what the characters are saying, as in all the conversations are a blur. I'm not trying to be a jerk, it's just that I find myself having a hard time trying to focus. I even made a song!
I hate this show and I can not lie
All my patio peeps will understand
That nothing on this show is worth watching
But we are dedicated peeps
so we will keep on recapping
I might need therapy this is no lie
I wonder if Televisa will help me out?
Okay, so not the best song but it's the best I could do!
On to the recap:
We get Esmeralda doing a whole speech about how she tried to let go of the color black with no luck, she tried to insert color into her life but the dark keeps creeping in, and that's how you know a telenovela is bad, when a character stands around looking in a mirror and does a whole five minute monologue about a color. Kill me now.
Rita is getting married and is being a total jerk about inviting people over to the reception, she's afraid everyone will come over and that there won't be enough food to feed everyone. The people at the reception laugh and think her attitude is cute. I do not. I am not buying what the writers are trying to sell. Rita is a witch and nothing they say or do will make me change my mind.
Fernando's detective has found out more information on Juan Garza and gives him his address, and then he goes down stairs and flirts a little with Jarocha, if they make this the Jarocha show I could live with that, she has more personality than Esmeralda.
Fernando ditches the wedding and goes to confront Garza, he tells him that he will defend his daughter against him and that he killed a man over less. Then he pulls a gun on Juan and exits his apartment. Dude, have these people learned nothing about threatening people? Whatever. I don't care.
Pablo goes to Gisela and asks her if she has anything to do with Garza, she says she is not behind this scheme and that her only crime is loving him. She also throws in that she's all better now because she's been taking her medication. Why does he even keep visiting her? She accused him of trying to kill him! She tried to set a room on fire with him in it! Does this moron never learn?
Lorenza and Gisela plot, Lorenza tells her that she has Esmeralda close enough to deliver her death blow, Gisela is all over that!
Garabato is mad cause he thinks the rich folks are all to blame for him being a dumpster baby, he takes his anger out on a poor beat up truck and swears revenge.
Mariano and Fernando have a meeting that pretty much ends up in them saying that the DNA test won't happen until the court orders it, but they don't want it to go that far. Ummm, so why don't you take your wallets to a clinic and have a private test done you idiots?! Dios santo que gente tan estupida!
Esmeralda looks after Agustin, and he hates it, he thought bubbles that he can't stand her. My sister watched with me and said: "is he complaining about having someone look after him?" Me: "yep", her "what a lil b*tch"
Mariano goes to babysit Agustin and then in a really bad edit they show him back at his office thinking about how he will do anything to save Esmeralda and her reputation, it got to the point where I thought he would be pushing Garza into traffic, but nope. His big plan was to break into Garzas apartment to look for something that would tell them who Garza really is and who he is working for. Lucky for mariano Garza forgot his cell phone on a living room chair that was right in front of mariano! However, Mariano, too busy thought bubbling wastes time and when he finally finds the phone it is too late because Garza has returned! I wanted to throw something at my tv. I swear a blood vessel burst!
They have a verbal show down, Mariano is sure Garza is a criminal, garza maintains he just wants the truth to come out, he wants things to go peacefully, no need for violence. I'd say we need loads of violence.
Esmeralda is getting the babies that need human growth hormone ready to visit Lorenza and Agustin, she asks Jarocha what everyone is keeping from her, Jarocha says nothing is up.
Lorenza tortures Agustin and while normally I'd find that awful behavior, because you know he is in a freaking wheelchair, I really can't bring myself to feel any sympathy. Die you old goat. Just die. Lorenza hears Esmeralda and fakes a fainting spell. Esmeralda falls for it.
Guys, Maury could have settled this shit in one five minute segment!
Oh, and excuse how vulgar I am but i heard this song on the radio the other night and the lyrics went something like "I don't give, I don't give, I don't give a f*ck about you"-that's how I feel about this novela, but you guys- make watching this worth it/
Previous: Episode 93
Next: Episode 95
I hate this show and I can not lie
All my patio peeps will understand
That nothing on this show is worth watching
But we are dedicated peeps
so we will keep on recapping
I might need therapy this is no lie
I wonder if Televisa will help me out?
Okay, so not the best song but it's the best I could do!
On to the recap:
We get Esmeralda doing a whole speech about how she tried to let go of the color black with no luck, she tried to insert color into her life but the dark keeps creeping in, and that's how you know a telenovela is bad, when a character stands around looking in a mirror and does a whole five minute monologue about a color. Kill me now.
Rita is getting married and is being a total jerk about inviting people over to the reception, she's afraid everyone will come over and that there won't be enough food to feed everyone. The people at the reception laugh and think her attitude is cute. I do not. I am not buying what the writers are trying to sell. Rita is a witch and nothing they say or do will make me change my mind.
Fernando's detective has found out more information on Juan Garza and gives him his address, and then he goes down stairs and flirts a little with Jarocha, if they make this the Jarocha show I could live with that, she has more personality than Esmeralda.
Fernando ditches the wedding and goes to confront Garza, he tells him that he will defend his daughter against him and that he killed a man over less. Then he pulls a gun on Juan and exits his apartment. Dude, have these people learned nothing about threatening people? Whatever. I don't care.
Pablo goes to Gisela and asks her if she has anything to do with Garza, she says she is not behind this scheme and that her only crime is loving him. She also throws in that she's all better now because she's been taking her medication. Why does he even keep visiting her? She accused him of trying to kill him! She tried to set a room on fire with him in it! Does this moron never learn?
Lorenza and Gisela plot, Lorenza tells her that she has Esmeralda close enough to deliver her death blow, Gisela is all over that!
Garabato is mad cause he thinks the rich folks are all to blame for him being a dumpster baby, he takes his anger out on a poor beat up truck and swears revenge.
Mariano and Fernando have a meeting that pretty much ends up in them saying that the DNA test won't happen until the court orders it, but they don't want it to go that far. Ummm, so why don't you take your wallets to a clinic and have a private test done you idiots?! Dios santo que gente tan estupida!
Esmeralda looks after Agustin, and he hates it, he thought bubbles that he can't stand her. My sister watched with me and said: "is he complaining about having someone look after him?" Me: "yep", her "what a lil b*tch"
Mariano goes to babysit Agustin and then in a really bad edit they show him back at his office thinking about how he will do anything to save Esmeralda and her reputation, it got to the point where I thought he would be pushing Garza into traffic, but nope. His big plan was to break into Garzas apartment to look for something that would tell them who Garza really is and who he is working for. Lucky for mariano Garza forgot his cell phone on a living room chair that was right in front of mariano! However, Mariano, too busy thought bubbling wastes time and when he finally finds the phone it is too late because Garza has returned! I wanted to throw something at my tv. I swear a blood vessel burst!
They have a verbal show down, Mariano is sure Garza is a criminal, garza maintains he just wants the truth to come out, he wants things to go peacefully, no need for violence. I'd say we need loads of violence.
Esmeralda is getting the babies that need human growth hormone ready to visit Lorenza and Agustin, she asks Jarocha what everyone is keeping from her, Jarocha says nothing is up.
Lorenza tortures Agustin and while normally I'd find that awful behavior, because you know he is in a freaking wheelchair, I really can't bring myself to feel any sympathy. Die you old goat. Just die. Lorenza hears Esmeralda and fakes a fainting spell. Esmeralda falls for it.
Guys, Maury could have settled this shit in one five minute segment!
Oh, and excuse how vulgar I am but i heard this song on the radio the other night and the lyrics went something like "I don't give, I don't give, I don't give a f*ck about you"-that's how I feel about this novela, but you guys- make watching this worth it/
Previous: Episode 93
Next: Episode 95
Labels: gata
Comments:
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You are an angel for continuing to watch and translate this horrible show. The previews made me want to vomit. Of course a dna test comes back with Pablo not the father!!
After Mariano's thought bubble, all I could think was "he is going to die before this whole thing is done".
How many more episodes? I need the pain to end but can't seem to pull my own plug.
After Mariano's thought bubble, all I could think was "he is going to die before this whole thing is done".
How many more episodes? I need the pain to end but can't seem to pull my own plug.
girly, you be crazy
"I used to be a happy girl, but this show has broken my spirit"
"whole five minute monologue about a color. Kill me now."
Two cute scenes. Virginia catching the bouquet and Jarocha not understanding the PI wanted to take her for coffee, not for her to go get him some, and then thinking she has lost her touch with men.
The rest was crap
Fernando spent the first third of this thing telling everyone he wasn't a killer but now wants to cash in on a killer reputation. Juan gonna shove it right back at him, tattle telling to Garabato and use him to neutralize Fernando. Good move.
"I used to be a happy girl, but this show has broken my spirit"
"whole five minute monologue about a color. Kill me now."
Two cute scenes. Virginia catching the bouquet and Jarocha not understanding the PI wanted to take her for coffee, not for her to go get him some, and then thinking she has lost her touch with men.
The rest was crap
Fernando spent the first third of this thing telling everyone he wasn't a killer but now wants to cash in on a killer reputation. Juan gonna shove it right back at him, tattle telling to Garabato and use him to neutralize Fernando. Good move.
Thank you! It's so validating to hear a native speaker say that this crap makes no sense.
Don't ever worry about being crude. Is any show deserves it, it's this one.
I dread having to recap tonight.
I think this was actually only episode 94, so we still have 28 horrifyingly crappy episodes to go.
Don't ever worry about being crude. Is any show deserves it, it's this one.
I dread having to recap tonight.
I think this was actually only episode 94, so we still have 28 horrifyingly crappy episodes to go.
Eli, gracias tanto! I'm digging your song. I'm going to create some choreography. It consists mostly of rude hand gestures. I'm classy like that.
"that's how you know a telenovela is bad, when a character stands around looking in a mirror and does a whole five minute monologue about a color." I have resorted to putting the English captions back on because Mr. 5ft kept asking WTF was going on, so, because I didn't have to explain this monologue last night, we instead took turns saying..."What...the...what...the...yeah...no...yeah...no...yeah...oh...my...." It wasn't our most articulate moment, but come on! A monologue to a color!?
"Rita is a witch and nothing they say or do will make me change my mind." They're not even trying. She had this very nice wedding and did everything she could to make it tacky and ridiculous.
"and then he goes down stairs and flirts a little with Jarocha, if they make this the Jarocha show I could live with that, she has more personality than Esmeralda." Word!
"Why does he even keep visiting her? She accused him of trying to kill him! She tried to set a room on fire with him in it! Does this moron never learn?" Word.
"Ummm, so why don't you take your wallets to a clinic and have a private test done you idiots?! Dios santo que gente tan estupida!" Word.
"it got to the point where I thought he would be pushing Garza into traffic, but nope. His big plan was to break into Garzas apartment to look for something that would tell them who Garza really is and who he is working for." I was SO DISAPPOINTED! If you're going to do something that could potentially completely ruin your life and get you sent to jail forever, at least make it murder and not B&E!
And as much as this episode sucked, I found the entire recap quotable. Thank your sister for suffering through this with you!
"that's how you know a telenovela is bad, when a character stands around looking in a mirror and does a whole five minute monologue about a color." I have resorted to putting the English captions back on because Mr. 5ft kept asking WTF was going on, so, because I didn't have to explain this monologue last night, we instead took turns saying..."What...the...what...the...yeah...no...yeah...no...yeah...oh...my...." It wasn't our most articulate moment, but come on! A monologue to a color!?
"Rita is a witch and nothing they say or do will make me change my mind." They're not even trying. She had this very nice wedding and did everything she could to make it tacky and ridiculous.
"and then he goes down stairs and flirts a little with Jarocha, if they make this the Jarocha show I could live with that, she has more personality than Esmeralda." Word!
"Why does he even keep visiting her? She accused him of trying to kill him! She tried to set a room on fire with him in it! Does this moron never learn?" Word.
"Ummm, so why don't you take your wallets to a clinic and have a private test done you idiots?! Dios santo que gente tan estupida!" Word.
"it got to the point where I thought he would be pushing Garza into traffic, but nope. His big plan was to break into Garzas apartment to look for something that would tell them who Garza really is and who he is working for." I was SO DISAPPOINTED! If you're going to do something that could potentially completely ruin your life and get you sent to jail forever, at least make it murder and not B&E!
And as much as this episode sucked, I found the entire recap quotable. Thank your sister for suffering through this with you!
"I'm confused. Why does Garza want to bring down Fer or Esme? Wasn't it Augie that set him up?"
They haven't explained yet. He made it sound like there's a part of what he's doing that's because he was hired and a part that's personal. Esme is the "personal" part, but they haven't told us why. Way back at the beginning, when I didn't know why he was in jail, I thought it was either for trying to molest her or because she was the one who turned him in for whatever he had done. Now that I know that's not what happened, I have no clue why he should have ANY feelings in ANY way for this girl who was just a baby when he was put away. Was he jealous that his mom was taking care of a couple of kids that weren't hers? Then why not go after Carlos as well?
And once again...why does he not seem to care at ALL about Ines? He's never even said her name or talked about his child!
I don't know how much to read into the fact that the person Garza called had a white phone and manly hands. I want to believe that means it's a man financing this whole thing, but who knows. When we finally find out, it could end up being one of the ladies, with a lady-ish manicure and a bright pink phone. Mr. 5ft and I were wondering if maybe Monica's dad hired him...he's the only guy we can think of who has money.
They haven't explained yet. He made it sound like there's a part of what he's doing that's because he was hired and a part that's personal. Esme is the "personal" part, but they haven't told us why. Way back at the beginning, when I didn't know why he was in jail, I thought it was either for trying to molest her or because she was the one who turned him in for whatever he had done. Now that I know that's not what happened, I have no clue why he should have ANY feelings in ANY way for this girl who was just a baby when he was put away. Was he jealous that his mom was taking care of a couple of kids that weren't hers? Then why not go after Carlos as well?
And once again...why does he not seem to care at ALL about Ines? He's never even said her name or talked about his child!
I don't know how much to read into the fact that the person Garza called had a white phone and manly hands. I want to believe that means it's a man financing this whole thing, but who knows. When we finally find out, it could end up being one of the ladies, with a lady-ish manicure and a bright pink phone. Mr. 5ft and I were wondering if maybe Monica's dad hired him...he's the only guy we can think of who has money.
Didn't we get to see the finger of the guy behind this latest bullshit plan? Looked like a male finger.
Lol, Sara, I guess we're all grasping at the same straws, trying to come up with some logic for this train wreck!
If 121 is the correct number, we have 25 episodes left, which would be 5 weeks...at which point, haven't they usually started teasers for the next show, plus an announcement of Ultimas Semanas?
If 121 is the correct number, we have 25 episodes left, which would be 5 weeks...at which point, haven't they usually started teasers for the next show, plus an announcement of Ultimas Semanas?
Where did I get 121 from? Wishful thinking!
Still, isn't it about time they tell us it's wrapping up?
Still, isn't it about time they tell us it's wrapping up?
gawd, how many colors are there at Sherwin Williams, if Esmealda must wax poetic all of them, it will never be over
Pink, my ever-constant friend. I've loved you as long as I can remember. I thought once, that I would have to abandon you. That pink was a color for bubble gum and glittery frocks and not at all suitable for a grown woman. I tried to set you aside, bringing more red and purple into my life, and while I enjoyed the vibrancy, there has always been something pulling me back to you. You are my color, pink. Some may think you wishy-washy and girly (and they say it with a sneer) or think that by loving you I have embraced a traditional and limiting gender role. But, to me, you are none of those things. I embrace you because I want to, and I'm perfectly happy to wear you while pursuing such stereotypically feminine pursuits as knitting or working in the kitchen, just as I am while wielding power tools or assembling Ikea furniture or helping dismantle the patriarchy. One day, pink, you may move on, but until that day, you will always be part of my life, and I will always opt for you as the color for anything I purchase, as long as you're an option and you don't cost extra.
Eli, thanks for slogging thru this...uhm...story.
I hate the faked DNA plot device. So stupid.
I think the main thing wrong with this is that no one is sneaking around having sex.
(from yesterday) Gringo, you're throwing in the towel? Oh, no! That must mean we're in an unrecoverable tail spin. Break out the parachutes.
Thanks again, Eli.
David
I hate the faked DNA plot device. So stupid.
I think the main thing wrong with this is that no one is sneaking around having sex.
(from yesterday) Gringo, you're throwing in the towel? Oh, no! That must mean we're in an unrecoverable tail spin. Break out the parachutes.
Thanks again, Eli.
David
Permalink posted by 
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 4:27:00 PM EST
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 4:27:00 PM EST
Thanks Eli even if you don't like it, you soldiered through like a trooper.
Why des everyone hate Esme? She is kind and sweet to everyone, even to those that would hurt her?
Diva---Your late comment yesterday made me laugh. But again, I found mistakes in my comment. Proof read!!!
the gringo
Why des everyone hate Esme? She is kind and sweet to everyone, even to those that would hurt her?
Diva---Your late comment yesterday made me laugh. But again, I found mistakes in my comment. Proof read!!!
the gringo
Permalink posted by : Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 4:34:00 PM EST
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 4:34:00 PM EST
"I think the main thing wrong with this is that no one is sneaking around having sex." David, I agree! More sex = less time to say/do stupid things!
gringo, maybe that's what happens when someone inhales too much Eau de Protagonista...they go from being crazy about her to just plain crazy!
gringo, maybe that's what happens when someone inhales too much Eau de Protagonista...they go from being crazy about her to just plain crazy!
You wanna know what the real problem with this is? There's no drama, no tension, nothing, it's just bland, like white rice!
Permalink posted by : Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 5:36:00 PM EST
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 5:36:00 PM EST
Thanks so much Eli for the wonderful recap!
The 5 minute "black" monlogue. WTH?
When did Esme and Pablo get back together? Did I blackout and miss something? Last I remember she was still upset with him. Didn't she reject him even after he brought along the Gata portrait?
What was up with the dress Esme chose to wear to the wedding? It was so short. She should burn it.
Speaking about the wedding, why did they get married in a chapel and not in a real church? That was funny when Doña Rita slapped Cha Cha after the kiss.
I hope the big reveal of who is behind "Juan Garza" will be good. I want to be left shocked.
The 5 minute "black" monlogue. WTH?
When did Esme and Pablo get back together? Did I blackout and miss something? Last I remember she was still upset with him. Didn't she reject him even after he brought along the Gata portrait?
What was up with the dress Esme chose to wear to the wedding? It was so short. She should burn it.
Speaking about the wedding, why did they get married in a chapel and not in a real church? That was funny when Doña Rita slapped Cha Cha after the kiss.
I hope the big reveal of who is behind "Juan Garza" will be good. I want to be left shocked.
Eli, honey, I feel ya, I feel ya! When I saw that scene with Esme in black, I thought I had missed a day. I thought maybe Esme had undiagnosed multiple personality disorder and this was the Esme that boinked Juan Garza and she doesn't remember when she is in one of her other "heads." Hell. It makes just as much sense as anything else going on!
Thank you Eli, this is only the second time I haven't watched an episode. I thank you for blowing the gasket for me. This big, hairy problem could so have been over the same day it presented itself. Couldn't watch G, couldn't watch Augie, couldn't watch Lo.
I did get as far as the wedding. I actually thought Rita looked pretty but she has definitely put the nail in the coffin for the traditional meaning of a white wedding dress. Good lord!
Diva. Your soliloquy on pink was absolutely MARvelous, girl! Love it! Love. It. The recap and this little outburst I'm sure far surpassed anything in the show.
Eli. Bless you, my child. Bless you and all of Caray, along with Diva, Sara and I are in solidarity with you!!
Thank you Eli, this is only the second time I haven't watched an episode. I thank you for blowing the gasket for me. This big, hairy problem could so have been over the same day it presented itself. Couldn't watch G, couldn't watch Augie, couldn't watch Lo.
I did get as far as the wedding. I actually thought Rita looked pretty but she has definitely put the nail in the coffin for the traditional meaning of a white wedding dress. Good lord!
Diva. Your soliloquy on pink was absolutely MARvelous, girl! Love it! Love. It. The recap and this little outburst I'm sure far surpassed anything in the show.
Eli. Bless you, my child. Bless you and all of Caray, along with Diva, Sara and I are in solidarity with you!!
Patio peeps, I need your help. Diva mentioned English captions, but I don't know how to activate them. I can get them in Spanish, but by the time I figure out what is being said, something else is happening. Have Direct TV and have called technical support and they told me not possible. I guess I am technically challenged on this one. Can anyone help me?
Eli, I too can't figure out why I spend an hour a night to watch this stuff, but keep coming back for more. Thanks for the recap!!
Eli, I too can't figure out why I spend an hour a night to watch this stuff, but keep coming back for more. Thanks for the recap!!
Permalink posted by : Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 6:42:00 PM EST
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 6:42:00 PM EST
One thing does chap my butt. Esmeralda taking care of Augie after all the guy has done to Fernando & Blanca. Blanca even tried to have a chat about it and she just looked away and wagged her head a bit and wanted to go stay in her apartment. I fear for those twins and should have a cognitive test done now, especially since both those peas should have been for one pod.
RED ... when I attempt to watch this crap all I see is red. Not a rosy red as in a hint of blush on the innocent prota's demure cheeks as she looks up through her lashes at the handsome, courageous and strikingly intelligent Sir Galahad who has swept her off her feet and is determined to save her from the brujas and brujos of the tale. Not even the red of embarrassment that I am still trying to force a redeemable story out of this unadulterated cochinada that is Latoodle's latest offering. No, it's the red of "SEEING RED" as in a rage that once again I have allowed myself to think, "Well, maybe this one won't be so bad ..." and proceeded to waste my time with it ... time that I can never get back! UGHHH!!!
Permalink posted by : Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 7:03:00 PM EST
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 7:03:00 PM EST
emeraldrose, on my TV, the English captions are on Caption Channel 3. I don't know if it's the "analog" or the "digital" channel, so I always set them both to the same one. On some English-language stations, Channel 3 gives you Spanish captions. For me, it's an option on my TV itself, not the cable box. The cable box has a "CC" button, but it doesn't seem to do anything.
Anon, thank you for the RED monologue!
Anon, thank you for the RED monologue!
Thank you Diva, I will give it a try.
Permalink posted by : Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 7:23:00 PM EST
: Tuesday, January 13, 2015 at 7:23:00 PM EST
Wow Anon! Look at the beautiful literary blossoms that have sprouted from this steaming pile of crap! Beautiful! You nailed it! Let this be a lesson to us: Just say "no" to LaToodle-oo!
Sorry this telenovela has turned out so badly. I did not last past the first episode. Well, to be honest, the first thirty minutes. Ack.
The fact that LaToodle is married to Mejía might explain a lot. LOL
I am hoping that the next crop of telenovelas will have something that I want to watch. I am seriously in withdrawal after Reina de Corazones ended AND I miss the Caray mates and Fellowship Of The Patio.
The fact that LaToodle is married to Mejía might explain a lot. LOL
I am hoping that the next crop of telenovelas will have something that I want to watch. I am seriously in withdrawal after Reina de Corazones ended AND I miss the Caray mates and Fellowship Of The Patio.
You can always come hang out on the patio, whether you're watching or not! We're all waiting to see what's going to come next after this one.
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