Thursday, October 09, 2008

El Cuerpo del Deseo, Wed,. Oct. 8 - PJ/S saves Azur and Valeria but sees Isabel kissing Andrés

Sorry, I'm behind in posting. Life has gotten in the way.


PJ/S uses his knowledge of personal details about the human resources director to convince him that he really did work at the company in the past.

Rebeca makes a move on PJ/S.

Valeria accidentally drinks poison that Walter intended for the dog. She manages to stagger out to where PJ/S is before she collapses and he insists that she be brought to the hospital immediately. This saves her life.

PJ/S proves that Azur isn't rabid when it rolls over lets him, a supposed stranger, rub its tummy.

Gaetana goes all out in bizarre outfits when she takes PJ/S to a bar to get his reaction to her idea to open a bar in her house. PJ/S is not supportive of this idea.

PJ/S's reaction when he sees...

Isabel passionately kissing Andrés.

PJ/S is really bummed out.

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Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Fuego, Wed., Oct. 8: Dating services?! Heck, I'll just take a stroll in the dark, scary forest and see what I can scrape off the stumps.

Buenas noches a todos.

You know it’s never good when Fernie pays Oscar a visit. Attorney Fernie has brought the divorce papers and needs Oscar to sign them immediately. Oscar isn’t gonna sign nothin’, but not because he doesn’t know how. It’s because he loves Jimena enough for the both of them. Sorry Charlie, Jimena signed the papers before she went into the coma or whatever Fernie and/or her mother put her in. Yeah, I guess if you squint really hard and turn the paper upside down and imagine that Jimena can write in cursive it sort of does look like she signed it. Well, that must mean she wants a D-I-V-O-R-C-E. Where do I sign?!

Frankie is digging something when Oscar comes along all pissed-off. You’re not doing it right he tells Franco, and harasses the lone brother who makes a conscious effort to keep things above water around their new digs. Well what bit you? Ah, I just divorced Jimena. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I divorced Sarita. No, that doesn’t make me feel any better. Then along comes Pablito with the drinking jar. You know, I heard Mexico was a major producer of plastic bottles, yet they’re still using good old fashioned pewter jars for a diet rich in lead.

Now Quinti has started a motorcycle taxi agency. It’s a fine, upstanding business in which she uses Gramps’ moto, Gramps’ gas, and Gramps’ clothes to operate a vehicle in questionable condition without a proper license, and exceeds the speed limit. It’s even endorsed by Padre Tadeo. With passengers like chickens and doves it augments the petting zoo perfectly. And in addition to providing local clergyman with free transportation, she provides our hundreds of viewers with English lessons: Time is money, business, business, business, and my personal favorite, see you later! You know they’re desperate when they actually give Quinti some camera time.

So the brother of Baldie (guy in hospital) comes to the Reyes with a basket of fruit and vegetables from the market to repay them for their hospitality. Sorry it’s not cash, but it’s all we had. Here’s an idea: sell the fruits and vegetables from the market in the market and give the cash to the Reyes. Apparently they’re all family now—who isn’t in this joint? Oscar is a sour-puss because of his divorce with Jimena. Talk about a freakin’ ingrate… Oh, but there’s an explanation. Gabi took advantage of Jimena’s illness and made her sign the documents. Gee, I didn’t see that coming from a mile away. Well, the point is Oscar didn’t, and now feels really stupid, as he should.

Just as Aladdin would visit Jasmine from the balcony, Oscar finds a way to see Jimena by means of the balcony. He tells Jimena that he feels really guilty, etc., blah-blah, you know the drill… No matter how much he talks, she still sits there with that wide-eyed stare and heaving breasts. Oscar holds her hand and sobs. Jimena tears up. How? I don’t know.

Damian asks Padre Tadeo for some help: last night he saw a woman dressed all in black, who seemed to be suffering very much, who is it? Padre Tadeo says that it is absolutely ridiculous that someone would be walking around in the forest crying. That’s what all reason would tell you, but remember where you live. Well, Damian is going to see that woman again because she really impressed him, a lot.

Baby music. How it transports Sofia and me back to yonder years. I had a little white lamb and when you would wind the knob on its side it would play the same song… Anyway, Sofia is a basket case.

Whoa! Wrong wardrobe Juan, Rodrigo is over on set 3, this is FELS. Sorry, but for a minute I thought Juan was wearing clothing from this century. Anyway, he’s alive, and wants to know where the lady doctor is, apparently she’s alive too.

Uh oh, the tribe drunkard approaches said lady doctor and starts groping her. She resists, but the tequila has made him bold. He rips off her top and we see her boobies. Well, at least we know that these, unlike Rosario’s, are real because they jiggle more than Grandma’s jell-o.

Sofia has had it with the mourning and is going to take a stroll. Gee, she was only raped twice (that we know of) after she went walking in the woods at night; when will she ever learn? Well, Gabi is not going to have her daughter be the town “llorona” and demands that she stay at home. Nope. Sofia doesn’t care what people think about her. Somebody’s been reading Betty Friedan… Gabi is ashamed of her. Oh yeah? Well, you shame me for the way you treat my sisters. SLAP! Who are you to judge me? Gabi says that she’s gonna get rid of Sofia right this very instant. Do it! Do it! There isn’t much left to me! Honey, there never really was.

Well, the idiot decided to dress in black and take a stroll in the dark, spooky forest. Spanish guitar—that’s his cue (that’s what they do in low-budget productions). What would Damian be doing in the dark forest, too? We know that they are going to fall in love and propose marriage because everyone knows that Spanish guitars mean love. He looks into Sofia’s eyes with desire and asks who she is. Well, that’s one way to meet psycho/depressed/ex-mothers.
Why are you stopping me, with what right? Save it for community theater sweetheart. Damian can’t believe how much pain Sofia has. They say I’m the “llorona,” I guess I am. Wait, why am I talking to you, you’re a stranger. And, if I see you again, don’t talk to me. Spanish castanets; must mean she’s playing hard to get.

Juan is searching for the “llorona” in the middle of the same dark, spooky forest. Now I know these people have shit for brains, but I thought it was a fundamental human instinct to hunt and gather during the day. But then again, noting adventurous or sexy happens before 10:00 p.m. Uh oh. That can only be the cry of one woman; the lady doctor. The drunk hasn’t gotten very far and is still sitting on her trying to take off her tank tops. Juan arrives with time to spare and punches the guy out. Lady doctor actually looks like she enjoyed it. Juan takes off his shirt and gives it to lady doctor. They embrace. Uh oh. Sofia flashbacks urge him to call said lady doctor “mi niña.”

Ooo, Damian is rich; we know this because he is drinking wine by a fire in a village without phones. He still can’t get over Sofia’s sadness. Gosh, they really know how to drive a point home. Damian observes his Kama Sutra statue and ponders Sofia’s nineteenth-century sex appeal. He has to find out more… With all this Spanish music I’d be led to believe he’s Spanish. It’s obvious the sound managers are on crack—or retarded.

Interestingly enough (but not surprisingly), Sofia is having her own hot flashes and flashbacks. Why did she encounter the same man twice—with what right? Oh my God, for one second could we puh-lease try to pretend that we aren’t in a Lana Turner movie? Secondly, I want to point out how confused these people are. What would a guy like Damian see in Sofia? I think we all know that he’s going to propose marriage sometime in the near future, and most likely plant his seed in her battered garden.

The drunken guy is really fed up with Juan, and wants the witch doctor to knock him off. Don’t worry he’s got it coming to him, but then again, if a gunshot wound and a fifty-foot fall won’t do you in, I don’t know what will.

Half-naked Juan helps half-naked lady doctor tie her shirt strings. Like we haven’t seen this trick before… He almost chokes her. I think it’s supposed to be a romantic moment—blame the actors, I do. But when they tried to show Juan’s underwear, everything went downhill. Oh, I like a direct girl. She wants to know why he doesn’t give her a chance; they would make such a great couple. For such a “smart” girl, she is so dumb. Juan puts his arm around her. Could it be love? If the burlap shirt fits…

If I have to see one more scene where pious Sofia goes to church and begs the Virgin not to abandon her I’m going to throw this laptop through the TV. That would not be good…

From now on Fernie is the owner/master of the ranch and holds a staff meeting to inform everyone of his promotion.

Gramps tells Fernie that he is completely mistaken, and his lawyer has secured 20% of the ranch for Gramps. On top of that, Fernie admitted to stealing all of Gramps money. Wait a minute! You leave my husband alone says Gabi. Everyone hates Fernie because you’re all trying to ruin my happiness. If she could only grow up! She loves Fernie and is going to back him in everything. Be careful Gabi. Fernie is like a rat, and is going to steal all of your money! Gabi ponders, no it couldn’t happen…
Over at the Goodwill/Elizondo store of junk with inflated prices Sofia brightens visibly and greets everyone with smiles. Spanish guitar. Damian enters and something tells me he doesn’t want to make a purchase. I like how it took four people to say “buenos días” in a successive line.

Damian wants to get to know Sofia and offer her a friendship. This relationship is moving way too fast. She doesn’t mean to be rude (but she really does), but she doesn’t want a relationship with a man. I should have known she was into that sort of thing… The music here is ridiculous just as the women in this scene. They all check him out while he tries to convince Sofia that he wants to buy her crap.

Gabi asks Fernie if it’s true that he stole Gramps’s money. Of course it’s not true. My only interest is to protect you, would I do that? So this is what it looks like when you take the two most dysfunctional people in town and put them under one roof…

Franco is talking to his horse again. Where have you been? Have you found Juan? Are you gonna find him? Go look for him. OMG the horse actually goes. If they would only invest the money they paid the horse trainer in their script-writers’ salaries.

Well, you sure don’t see men like that around here says Rosario in response to Damian’s visit. Fernie is uncomfortable because he received orders from the boss. Completely unrelated, I know.

Uh oh. Black SUVs. That means trouble. My question is; why is it that they always come out of the wood work when Fernie passes by? Oh. There’s Oscar. He’s mad that Fernie made him sign that divorce paper. Oscar doesn’t understand that horses aren’t as fast as SUVs.

Oh my god. I just realized that Juan is supposed to have amnesia. Ok, this makes a little more sense, but you know how stupid he is, I thought he was just being himself. Well, anyway, Capricho comes along, and after weeks he finally found Juan. Juan sees him, rolls his eyes, screams in agony, rolls on the ground, scratches himself with sticks and rocks, and mostly screams some more. He reaches for Capricho but he is too far away. The witch doctor observes this display, and probably thinks that now he doesn’t have to kill Juan. I really don’t think there are words to articulate Juan’s display of what I think I just saw.

Tomorrow: Eva says that Damian didn’t come into the store for handicrafts, but for Sofia. Oh my God, you think? You would have to be blind, deaf, and retarded not to have gathered that. Oh, not only that, but Damian wants to cure the wounds of Sofia’s heart. But what about Juan? Just know that, as always, he’s happy in his own little world.

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Cuidado con el Angel- Wednesday, October 8, 2008

We left off with Patricio coming home and seeing Marichuy and Amador in each others arms. He gets out of his cars and tells Amador to leave. He then goes to Marichuy and asks what she has to say about what he just saw. He yells and her and tells her to go into the house. The housekeeper comes in and tells Ceci that there is trouble outside. Ceci and Isa run out to see what is going on. Ceci asks Marichuy what is wrong. Patricio says that he caught Marichuy in the arms of a man. Ceci looks at her with disbelief.

We go to the office of the padre and a lady (do not know her name) is crying that she does not want her daughter to come back and find out that she was a loose woman. She does not care what others say about her, but does not want her daughter to be condemned for her actions. She says that she will write her daughter a letter and tell her that she cannot come home until her studies are done when the padre asks her how are you going to keep your daughter away.

Patricio walks in the house still yelling about what he say. Marichuy, Ceci, Isa and the housekeeper follow him in with Marichuy denying what he saw. He asks her if she is calling him a liar. She says yes because he is telling lies. Isa yells at her to respect her elders. He keeps insisting that he knows what he saw. They get into a shouting match with her repeatedly calling him a liar. She runs to her room and Ceci is forbidden to go after her. She is crying in her room and is mumbling something that I do not understand. I think that she is asking why JM left her in this house.

JM is remembering his conversation with Marichuy.

Back in the living room Ceci is telling Patricio that Marichuy is crying and he says let her cry so that she will learn to respect the rules of the house. Isa comes in Patricio's defense that Marichuy is immoral and dangerous. The housekeeper says that she noticed that Marichuy was acting very odd. In walks Estephania talking about meeting JM and suprising him.

On the plane JM is talking to Edguardo about Marichuy and the feelings she stirs in him that he does not quite understand. Edguardo asks if he likes her which he admits. "Does she like you" Edguardo asks. "I don't know" says JM, "I think she sees me as a protector or her salvation." "What if she is in love with you, what would you do?" asks Edguardo.

Isa is updating Estephania on what is going on. Estehania puts her arms around Patricio and comes in Marichuy defense. Ceci begs Patricio to let her go to Marichuy and he says no. Estephania then asks to let her go, but again says no. Let her learn her lesson.

The next morning Marichuy is looking out the window of her room when Ceci finds out if she is coming out of her room today. She starts talking about last night and asks Marichuy to understand why Patricio was so upset. Marichuy says that Paticio does not know what really happened and will tell Ceci the truth.

Onelia sees Rocio and calls her into the living room saying that she will not permit her to play games by calling the house and saying that she is Viviana. Rocio says that it was not her, but her actual daughter calling. Onelia asks Rocio where is she going? Rocio says that she is going to see Marichuy because JM asked her to take her out. Onelia says of course if he cannot see her he makes sure that you do. This makes her very suspicious. Rocio says you always think the worst of people. Onelia ignores her and thinks aloud that JM brought Marichuy into the house because he is interested in her. And no wonder he let her daughter die so that he can kick it with Marichuy.

We see Viviana looking at herself in the mirror and glancing at her jewerly box. She notices that her braclet is missing and she starts looking for it. Her lover says that she probably lost it when she was drunk. He tells her to look again and he has a look on this face that says that he knows were it is.

Marichuy is telling Ceci about the incident that happened last night. Ceci is asking why she did not insist on telling Patricio even if he was telling you to keep quiet. Marichuy says that when she gets angry she closes up. Ceci tells Marichuy that she believes her and she wanted to see her last night, but could not since Patricio would not let her.

JM and Eguardo are walking out of a conference. Eguardo asks JM about the book that Estephania gave him at the airport.

Estephania spots JM sister and asks her if she has been helped. Rocio introduces herself and Estephania is delighted in meeting her. She says that she was going to call her to meet with her since she is friends with JM and wanted to get to know the rest of his family.

JM tells Eguardo that he left the book on the plane. Eduardo says that means you are not really interested in the person who gave you the gift. What are you going to tell her when she asks about it? All of a sudden a beautiful woman walks by and Edguardo says hi and that they have a party? to go to. To celebrate the end of single life. JM says are you serious? You will take liberties with your finance far away? Edguardo says no, I was just joking. He would never do that to Elsie.

Meanwhile Elsie is kissing her other man and he jokedly says that she kept him up all night. Elsie says that they have to seize the moment because Edguardo is a jealous man and after she gets married they cannot see each other. Dude with the glasses says that he is not a jealous man and even after she marries him they can still see each other in secret.

Isa asks Estephania to keep Ceci in the bedroom because she has important things to take care of. She goes outside and sees the padre walking up.

Marichuy and Rocio are walking down the street eating when Rocio spots the kiyaks and asks Marichuy to go on one with her. Marichuy does not want to.

Isa asks the padre if he came to see Marichuy. Yes, he says. Isa tells the padre that she left with JM sister. The padre turns to leave and remembers that he also came to see Ceci. Isa tells him that she left with her daughter and asks if he wants to wait. He agrees and Isa takes him to the backyard. Isa asks the padre if he has known Marichuy long. Yes, since her mother gave her to me when she was a babe about 20 years ago.

Marichuy and Rocio are on the water kiyaking and having a good time.

Ceci and Estephania are in Ceci's room. She asks Estephania how long JM will be gone for. About 10 days responds Estephania. Too bad Ceci says because Marichuy will miss him. "Do you think that she is in love with him" asks Estehania. No says Ceci , she feels grateful for saving her from jail. "Do you know what she did? She stoled milk for the kids at the orphanage." Ceci gets up to leave the room and Estephania tries to distract her, but she says later. Ceci asks Isa if she has seen the padre and thinks that it is odd that he did not show up since he wanted to meet with her. Estephania finds out from Isa that Marichuy could be the actual daughter of Ceci and Patricio. All their plans could be ruined.

JM is lounging by the pool reading a book. Girls are checking him out, but he thinking about Marichuy.

Ceci and Estephania come back from shopping and Ceci asks Isa if the padre has come yet. Isa says yes, but he left. He will call again to set up an appointment.

Isa asks Estephania if Ceci suspected anything about the padre. No says Estehania. Has Marichuy returned yet with JM sister? No says Isa then says you met JM sister? Yes and she has invited me to visit her at the house and will introduce me to his mother in law. I have to make a good impression so that I can win points with JM. In walks Marichuy and exchanges words with Isa and Estephania. Marichuy walks away and Isa says how she cannot stand her. Estephania says poor girl. She does not know what will happen to her if she crosses us.

Marichuy thinks about JM and envisions him coming to her and putting his arms around her then kissing her. She mutters his name as she falls asleep.

We then see Dr. McHotty in the shower. He steps out, water sliding off his rippled muscular chest. Darn it he puts on a towel, looks in the mirror and says Marichuy.

Back at Ceci's, Marichuy and Ceci are chit-chating and Ceci gives Marichuy money. She does not want it, but Ceci insists. Marichuy takes the money and buys the orphans milk and bread. She introduces Rocio to Cande afterwards and gets her dog.

Ceci, Isa and Estephania are in the living room drooling over Dr. McHotty who's picture was in the paper. Marichuy walks in and shows Ceci her dog. She spots the newspaper with JM's photo and goes into her room to cut out his picture. Estephania walks in demanding why she took the paper and cut out his photo. She wants it. Marichuy says take it then and Estephania slaps her. Marichuy knocks her to the bed, gets on top of her and starts pulling her hair.

Tomorrow: Remainder of the fight.

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QE - 10-8 Wed. Chalo is dead? Hortensia is forgiven? Al is main galan again?

See what happens when you drop off for a week? There actually is progress sometimes! Sigh...

I'm posting early because I may not be able to post later. We had airplane issues and our flight was delayed all day so I'm not getting home until later tonight. I'm going to see if I can get something together for you after all, but in the mean time, you all can at least post here.

We start with the pathetic grunting invalid (sorry, it's Snorty) and Omar forgiving her. She manages a handshake. I think she's actually touched. I'm seeing rehabilitation for her, for sure....

Zully is consoling Lore who is happy that she finally has the family that she always wanted. She thinks it's a pity that she can't share all this with Ern. Zully tells her pride is not a good console, or something along those lines, and that she should just call him. Of course she won't, she's still upset that he doubted her or something, besides she needs to confront Sara.

We go to said Ern lamenting the situation as well. Ivan is actually encouraging him. He is trying to manage the kids. Sorry but Ern earns some points here, I'm not giving up on him just yet!

He tells the kids he's got some news. The bad is that he's not going to be working at the restaurant anymore, so they will have to tighten their belts and watch their spending. He says the good news is that he can now spend more time with them! He's still got the institute classes so he's not unemployed but it's not enough to maintain a whole family. Funny he seemed to be ok before he started at the restaurant.... anyway, this leads the little girl to put back some of her cereal so they won't be as poor, and Ern very lovingly hugs her and says things aren't quite that bad and he gives her more cereal. CUTE!!!

Di can't get a hold of the lawyer about Vasco, and Julian says he'll check with Rossy after he compliments the ladies for their cooking. They are worried.

We then flash to Sara in bed waking up suddenly from a nightmare and realizing I think that Lore really was after her but no problem she'll get everything back that was hers, including Al. Hmmmm, me thinks not.

At the mansion Snorty is shaking her hand violently and our brilliant nurse declares to Omar that she must want to say something so she gets a pen and paper. She tells them that Sara better not enter the business. Omar makes that his mission and says between he Jaime and Vasco she'll never set foot in there again.

Julian is on the phone with Rossy who asks him how it's going with the new sis he stole from her. He says great and she was only on loan to Rossy. She tells him to enjoy it now because soon he'll leave that house when they are married. He's not so sure with those two great cooks. She scolds him of course. He is called for breakfast and Lore remarks how well the baby slept, but they say it was her who slept well because the baby cried all night!

Back at the mansion, Snorty is still up in arms and declares that this is punishment for Sara. Omar is befuddled because he says they are the first ones who would want to punish her but there is no proof, on account of the dead nun and all. Snorty continues scribbling that Sara tried to kill her, she is a murderess. omar believes her but wonders how they will prove it. he then tells everyone not to ever let Sara back in there and if she returns to let him know.

Out in the country Barb and Jaime are fretting over Vasco, when the doc has them summoned he says the wounds are really bad and he is hemorrhaging and that natural medicine is not enough and he needs to get to a real hospital so they have called for an ambulance. Barb says it's so far to a hospital and there isn't enough time, but just then the ambulance shows up so they go running after it.

Additions from Julie:

- Snorty wrote Bruno a note that he's not getting another penny out of her- Bruno beat the hell out of Diana so she took the baby and went to her mother's house and then she went to the police station to file a complaint against him

- Sara was going to use wimpy chiles (or maybe they were green onions, I didn't see) on her TV show, Julian swapped them out with habaneros, when she put them in the hot pan she choked from the burning smoke and threw a tantrum on the air (it's a live show). She was hoping to get some sympathy from her sugar daddy but instead he told her to... I didn't get all of this but I think she's supposed to apologize on TV the next day and say she had a nervous breakdown or something!

From Calamity Cakes:

Ernie finally gets hold of Lore just as she gets ready to start the community cooking classes. His tone is appologetic and it seems hers is too so wedding bells and hearts and doves seem to be back in the picture for the two of them. They admit neither one could get either one out of their head during the separation. Lore still doesn't have the presence of mind to tell him what happened. They agree to have her call him later in the day to give him a time and place to talk about ....stuff. Then Julian bugs her by phone during the class for a recipe that he doesn't tell her Sara's show is apparently using that day. Lorena gives him the recipe and shuts off her phone so she can teach without interruptions and apparently forgets to turn it back on after the old folks' class is over.

Sara shows up at Slow's and tries to worm her way out of her predicament, but for once his brain receptors don't short out and he gives her what for about what she did in breaking him and Lorena up, Chalo and otherwise criminally ursurping Lorena's past, present and future.

When Lorena gets back home at Zulema's Julian calls to tell them to turn on the tv and watch Sara's cooking show. They laugh so loud they wake up Diana who comes out looking like the wife of Frankenstein's monster. Just as Lorena's telling her to make a complaint at the local police station, Bruto parks himself in front of the gate and starts yelling he's sorry, it'll never happen again and let's go home. Diana panicks but goes outside anyway and confronts him. Lorena calls the police then Zule and Lorena join Diana in front. Lorena takes a few threatening steps towards him just as the police show up and he races off in his car. Zule and Lore join Diana at the police station while she makes her statement and a few minutes turns into hours while Ernie's calling to see what's up with their date and ovbiously can't reach her.



And as you all have said how great, I simply have to include this gem from Ferro, an observation on the finer points of Alonspeak:

"No she went to the Alonso school of delivering life-altering news! "Ok first act normal like what you are going to tell is no big deal, even though it is like the biggest deal ever. Then, don't ever get to the point until the person you are talking to is ready to punch you in the face.

Then stall some more, delivering lines like you are writing blurbs for a book jacket or movie poster. Stuff like 'this is the biggest news ever, just wait until you hear it' and 'what I am going to tell you will change your life' works great. Remember to speak slowly. Eventually, after a commercial break at least, you can finally deliver the news. Make sure to only give a little bit at a time, don't drop the whole bomb at once.

Hint around a little, say something that doesn't make sense without the rest of the information to support it, so you can have some more 'what? I don't understand' comments from who you are talking to. This makes it take even longer. Also, remember to keep a blank look on your face so the person listening to you STILL doesn't know if they should be excited, worried, or what. If you do this right you can make it take 15 minutes to tell someone what you ate for lunch. Good luck."


And I personally found Mike's comment so hysterical that I want to include it here as well:

Surprised the Sara character didn't flourish in the habañero smoke, I mean, her being a demon spawn and all. Would've expected a deep breath and a glassy-eyed smile followed by a spew of pea soup.


Thanks all!!!

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Cuidado Con El Ángel #12, Tues 10-7-08 The Sun’ll Come Out Tomorrow, or, We Know You’re Gonna Like It Here

Rehash: JM tells Eduardo he needs to go on a trip to get Mari out of his head; he just wants her to be happy.

Stef creepily and rudely awakens Marichuy to interrogate her as to her feelings for Juan Miguel. Mari equivocates and refuses to parse their relationship and finally says she doesn’t really know. Understandably, she seems to resent being asked.

New stuff: Stef returns to her room where Isabel is lounging on the bed, and shouldn’t she really have gone home by now? Stef reports on the inquisition and Isa again alludes to getting rid of that pesky orphan.

Next day, a new young maid, Dora (or possibly Doris; I couldn’t be sure and the captions switched back and forth), comes to Mari’s room to ask whether she’s coming to breakfast; Ceci and Pat are already in the dining room. Mari says she’ll eat in the kitchen, then invites Dora in to sit on the bed and kibbitz. They seem to hit it off right away, and Mari says she’s going to help with the cleaning to earn her keep. She likes being there where everything is pretty and clean.

Over at the castle, JM is on his way out, asking Rocío to mail some stuff for him and to be a friend to Marichuy while he’s gone. Go visit her, take her out shopping, to the movies, for ice cream, etc. Rocío is willing, and also looks like she’s caught on to the whole situation. She is surprised that JM isn’t going to go say goodbye to Mari before he leaves. FOR REAL, JUAN MIGUEL. You are supposed to be rehabilitating this young lady, and yet you avoid even speaking to her ever. What kind of program is this, exactly? All your psychological training hasn’t clued you in to the probability that she will feel confused and rejected? But, he thinks it will be better this way. How long is he planning to be away?

Well, I thought Dora said Ceci and Pat were in the dining room, but they are not. They are on the deck on the lawn, and the deer is having his breakfast, too, in the same spot as usual. Is he tied up? He’s always in the same place. Mari marches up to them, bucket and mop in hand, to ask what her work obligations are. She’s thinking first she’ll do the windows, then the floors, that way if she drips…

Ceci, playing the role of Grace Farrell, doesn’t understand why Mari thinks she has to work. Mari tells her so sayeth Patricio. Ceci says, “¿qué?” and glares at him.

In Miami, a steel band plays by a resort pool. Viv’s new hot tamale strolls past thong-bikinied women (ew. Really, who needs that much exposure? Getting your legs sunburned is bad enough) to give a lounging Viv a smooch, then he goes for drinks. She is living it up, indeed. She picks up her phone and dials.

The phone rings at the castle. The maid answers, so Viv hangs up.

Patricio says that Marichuy is lying; he didn’t say she has to work. She begs to differ, and reminds him (while gesticulating wildly with a hot pink duster) of their conversation, when he said she would get only what she deserved and would have to pay for her keep with chamba (means fluke or scratch, and in Mexico, slang for work, according to my dictionary). He argues that he was only referring to behaving well. Ceci looks either amused, full of pity for Marichuy, or annoyed at Patricio. It’s hard to tell.

In the poor barrio, Adrian asks Cande how Mari is getting along at the judge’s place…does she miss anyone, hint, hint? Yes, Adrian, she misses you desperately and wants you with her at every moment, so you can repeatedly consummate your passionate relationship, can’t you tell by the way she pushes you away and avoids you? Oh, wait, that’s what JM does to Marichuy. Maybe Adrian has been talking to him about how a person madly in lust behaves. ANYWAY, Cande tells him she likes it there, but Cande is worried and thinks they’ll exploit her. She thinks Mari is going to “desgajar” (split off, break away…I’m guessing she means run away) because they’ll treat her like a “cenicienta” (Cinderella).

Patricio and Cecilia tell Marichuy that she doesn’t have to work, just behave like a civilized person (say, I wonder how they got those windows fixed so fast. They were big windows; you’d think they would have to be special-ordered) and she doesn’t need to earn a home and food, just their affection. Ceci gets her to sit at the table.

Ceci’s phone rings; it is JM and Mari lights up. Ceci talks to him about his trip and asks if he’ll come over to say good bye. No? Then do you want to talk to Mari? Marichuy smiles and reaches for the phone, but he says he doesn’t have time to talk to her and he and Ceci hang up. Mari looks deflated. The deer, meanwhile, is attending to its bowel needs on the lawn in the background, which is so PERFECTLY appropriate a metaphor for JM’s treatment of Marichuy. I wonder how the film crew managed that.

JM sits in his office in his white coat and half-smiles and sighs and daydreams of Marichuy. Yeah, he’s super-busy. What does he actually do? Elsa comes in and asks if Eduardo is there yet; obviously he is not. She lights a cigarette. JM doesn’t smoke, but conveniently keeps a giant ashtray on the coffee table. He says he knows she and Eduardo are engaged, and asks pointedly if she’s broken up with “the other.”

Mari is climbing trees on the estate to pick fruit, which Ceci is putting in a basket. Ceci asks about her life at the orphanage; she says she left when she was 13 or 14 and uses the phrase “pinté de colores” as she has several times before when she refers to leaving the hospicio. I know it can mean “ripened” so maybe she means she was grown up or done there then, or something? Can anyone explain? Ceci asks who her parents were (DU-DUM).

JM tells Elsa that marriage is serious, too serious to be leading a double life. She says she knows, and after they’re married she will be a real wife, and even have children. Well, jeez, Elsa, don’t overshoot there or anything.

Mari says she never knew her parents, and wonders how her mother could have abandoned her. Ceci is very pained. She says, maybe your mother was very poor, or sick. Mari thinks that’s no excuse, but she notices that Ceci is not looking so good and comforts her. It’s quite sweet, and apparently no one filled Mari in on their precious daughter Stef’s story. Isabel lurks creepily behind a tree and eavesdrops on the conversation.

Stef, meanwhile, is bugging Patricio in his study, and learns that JM’s flight is leaving at 9:00 that evening. She wants to go to the airport to say goodbye. Pat just says he’s busy and can’t go; somehow he refrains from saying, “don’t be a crazy stalker, you creep!” She asks if she can use a car to go, and when he asks whether she can drive, she says sure, she had a car in New York. What is that? You lived in New York? OOPS. Seriously, stupidest criminal ever.

Ceci tells Mari she wants to be like a mother to her. Isabel doesn’t like that.

Stef tells Pat she worked as a nanny for a diplomat and went with the family to New York. They lived in the suburbs, so she had to drive the children around. He apparently buys that and says he’ll give her her own car, and she is a little too exuberant and affectionate.

They go out to the driveway and run into Ceci and Marichuy. Mari is annoyed that Stef is going to the airport to see JM. There is a whole fleet of cars in the driveway, which I’m pretty sure weren’t there before, and he tells Stef to choose one. Naturally, she picks the sleek convertible, the newest of them all. Apparently the keys are kept in the ignition.

Eduardo has arrived at JM’s office, and is pawing Elsa while JM gives her Looks. Marichuy and Ceci call, and Ed answers and asks if he should say JM left already.

Back in Miami, Viv again calls the house (from her lounge chair RIGHT in front of the steel drums) and Malvina/Balbina? answers. This time she says it’s Viviana, and the maid is shocked and hands the phone over to Onelia, but Lover Boy has come back for some action and hung up the phone. So now Ornerylia thinks the maid is crazy too.

Marichuy is still waiting for JM to answer, and uses the pintar de colores phrase again in reference to his having left for the airport. So I guess she just means “departed.” He finally answers, having shooed Ed and Elsa out, and they both grin like fools. They make cheesy romantic conversation, although Mari is worried that his plane will crash (again). He says it will be fine and promises to remember her. She says she’ll miss him.

In the parking garage, Ed is giving some guy a tip for putting his bags in JM’s trunk. (for real, Eduardo? What is all that gym time good for?) Flashback (the guy’s) of him being in JM’s office explaining that he can’t pay the fine for the bar brawl. Which I would guess means that Elsa knows him. Not sure what that was about.

Stef and Isabel catch each other up. Isabel agrees with me that Stef is an idiot.

Stef tells Mari and Ceci she’s off to the airport and makes them admire her. Mari looks annoyed; Ceci fails in her motherly duty to tell Stef not to be a creepy stalker. I mean, seriously, it’s not like they’re really friends and he’s going to be gone a year or something.

Eduardo comes back to fetch JM and JM’s dopey blissfulness after the phone call is not lost on Ed. Elsa will not be going with them to the airport because she has something to do at her theater job (or someone). Ed thinks that after they marry she will give up that experimental artsy stuff. Oh, Ed. Ditch her and marry me. I am every bit as boring as she thinks you are; I think we’d get along very well.

Amador sits on the stage in a theater, smoking a pipe and writing. Enter Elsa. She tells him her cousin is in love with Marichuy. He is impactado.

Stef finds the gents at the airport. They do not look excited to see her. They try to think back to their training on what to do about crazy stalkers.

Elsa and Amador plot to take advantage of Juan Miguel’s absence. Elsa says the Velardes won’t let him in; he says it won’t hurt to try.

Apparently, what JM and Ed do about stalkers is sit and have coffee with them. Ed is really encouraging Stef and enjoying tormenting JM. She gives him a book to read on the plane and remember her by. Eduardo thinks that is hysterical.

Marichuy talks to the cat and has animated thoughts about being Cinderella. She is sad that her handsome prince is away and probably smooching that wicked stepsister (as if) and imagines a fairy godmother (hada madrina) coming to help her.

JM and Ed are finally taking leave of Stef. She asks if she can give him a goodbye kiss. I don’t know what else is said; Eduardo and I are both nearly rolling on the floor laughing. Methinks JM is not going to hear the end of this. He consents to a peck on the cheek. I hope this conference is on how to not encourage creepy stalker criminals.

Amador climbs over the fence. Mari is chasing the cat and runs into him.

Our rich docs apparently fly coach. Now I’m glad I didn’t bother with medical school. They discuss JM’s attraction to Marichuy. He takes a few minutes to recall the various ladies in his life. Ed says it looks like Stef will be a rival with Mari. Umm…not if you don’t want her to be, Juan Miguel.

Speaking of, Viv and Beach Boy stumble drunkenly into the hotel room and make out. He removes her ring and puts it in his pocket.

Amador thinks assaulting Marichuy will endear her to him. She tells him to get his porky hands off her. They fight. He thinks she’s bored there, she says she’d rather be bored than with him. They fall on the extremely slick driveway.

Padre Anselmo once again counsels the guilt-ridden woman. I don’t know who she is yet, so I don’t care. Ceci calls and makes plans to visit him with Mari in the morning.

Patricio drives up as Mari and Amador fight in the driveway and demands to know what that scum is doing there.

Avances: Isabel realizes Marichuy could be the real child/heir.

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El Cuerpo del Deseo, Tues., Oct. 7 - PJ/S gets a job, makes two enemies and continues to confound the residents of the Donoso household

Walter spies on PJ/S changing into his chauffeur's uniform. This will turn out to be a popular activity. Walter runs off to tell Isabel that PJ/S is available for her to fire him.

Isabel is impactada on meeting PJ/S.

Isabel fires PJ/S but then when she asks why he lied about knowing her from the factory, he produces a letter of recommendation that he wrote about himself and waited 'til the ink dried. This letter convinces Isabel and Ángela to hire him as the chauffeur for the household much to Walter's disgust (enemy #1).

Just seeing PJ/S makes Valeria feel faint and causes her to immediately cancel her plans to leave Isabel's house.

Isabel and Ángela explain the new domestic arrangements to the staff. Note how everyone else is standing there respectfully while PJ/S is lounging casually against a pillar.

Valeria spies on PJ/S changing out of his chauffeur's uniform.

PJ/S's enemy #2 is Andrés, of course. Isabel's reaction to PJ/S makes him instantly jealous and he looks into PJ/S's claim that he worked at the factory and finds that it isn't true.

Meanwhile, PJ/S goes around saying things to people that PJ said and telling them things that only PJ knew.


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Doña Bárbara - Mon., Oct. 6 - We've got one definitely pregnant, one hoping she is pregnant and one hoping she's not pregnant

So Santos is basically an idiot and his accusation against DB for murdering JB comes to nothing. Then he goes home, hits the law books and figures out that he doesn't have any proof against DB. You might have thought about that before you dragged everyone out to El Miedo, Santos. But before he leaves El Miedo, DB tries to get Santos to kiss her. He's tempted but he pulls away.

Melesio throws Gervasia out of the house not because she's pregnant but because she reported on what was going on at Altamira to DB and brought liquor to try and kill Lorenzo. His other granddaughters don't agree with his action. Gervasia goes to El Miedo.

Lorenzo tells Marisela that Santos will never love her as a woman. He cares for her like a relative (and he is her cousin). Marisela doesn't accept this conclusion and when Santos tells her how much she means to him, Marisela looks at her father in triumph.

While Antonio watches, the priest tells Cecilia that she's not too old to be a bride in his church and he hopes to see her there very soon. The priest is thinking about the doctor as the groom, of course.

Someone has carelessly left the door of DB's black magic altar room open and Juan Primito goes in there and sees the picture of the rapists. Now both Marisela and JP have seen this picture. They will doubtless be the means for Santos to discover a motive for DB to kill JB and the guy who was eaten by pirañas.

After hearing about Gervasia, Cecilia calculates whether she might be pregnant. She's not overdue yet but if this is first time she is thinking about the consequences of unprotected sex, she not setting a very good example as a teacher.

DB takes Gervasia in and puts in motion an elaborate plan that succeeds in getting Santos to El Miedo in circumstances that make his men look like they picked a fight with her employees.

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Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Fuego 10/7 Tues, # 113, How Does La Llorona Get Her Groove Back? Ask Mama Who Has Certainly Found Hers




With a tip of the sombrero to Terry McMillan, I am still in a state of euphoria over my splendid trip to northern Spain and still grateful to Bridget for producing three fine recaps to keep this FELS nightmare, I mean telenovela, sailing along on the CarayCaray waves of delighted viewers. But on with tonight's action: Who is that handsome man on the white horse willing to pay whatever to graze his horses on the hacienda pastures just when the KingKidz need some ready cash? How convenient, as Dana Carvey used to say in his ChurchLady snidely way. And why is Verizon's La Llorona more attractively dressed than the FELS tear making machine, Sofia? But I digress into the mysteries of the universe.

Uncle Alejandro swears he will seek revenge himself is Feo is lying about the missing baby. But he is still saying it behind bars.
Feo plans his empire of a well run hacienda all under his absolute control, [why hasn't it worked yet if he has such talents?] Let's get to the hacienda and tell everyone of our wedding. No, the horny one wants to continue to boogie in the bed, Feo swears his only motive is her tranquility and health.

Sofia is slow but Jimena seems nearly comatose as she blinks at the news that Oscar has returned. Not even the Llorona can move her with the news that Oscar returned but without Juan and without my daughter. I won't be conquered, I am going out to look for my daughter. The dark forest would be a good place to start, lets wait until dark.

Damian has the luck to meet Quintina on the road with her wagon bed and horse while he is on his horse. Her confidence has been abused, she flirts outrageously. Damian promises to defend her against whatever.

Sarita comes in to ask what's the progress with Sister Sludge, aja Jimena. Sofia assures Sarita needs to regain her desire to love. Sarita sneers back that she has never lost her love.

Sofia has worked out that it is really their papa's fault, if he hadn't defrauded Libia, then she wouldn't have died, the Reyes wouldn't have come to seek revenge, the sister's wouldn't have fallen for these bricklaying, breadbaking hotties, the baby wouldn't have been stolen..... Let's go walk in the dark.

Damian is questioning Q about the lovely woman in the fog who he wants to meet (nooooooooo, Damian) Q tells him he has run into La Llorona, no kidding.

We get a bucket of tears in the girls bedroom to illustrate the truth of this naming. Sarita confesses that she can't forget her love for Franco. On the other side of town, Eva has to listen to Ros echo the same I'll never forget my love for Franco. Eva advises her to love someone else? Someone will surely come along.

Franco and Oscar work in the new bakery, oh I guess this is the kitchen of the hacienda, and discuss the disappearance of Juan. He's not dead, he's dead, he's not dead....

Damian offers a sherry (jerez) to a man I don't know who seems concerned for Damian's well being...... He says he has the feeling that here he will encounter the peace that has escaped him so far (don't put money on it honey)

Oscar appears in sombrero in the bedroom of sleeping locobeauty. It hurts him to see her so and he feels he is to blame. Here is a rose of crystal just like I gave you before. I can't stop thinking about you I have to get over it, If you still don't want to see me, I only want that you get well, that you return to the happy smiling girl you were. [I agree she's the only one with a relatively sunny disposition. Perhaps she was the one left on the hacienda steps in a basket]
******************
Franco has turned into a really productive guy. Ros comes to see him because she has been thinking so much about him and his suffering and she comes to offer her friendship. He needs a real friend just now who will listen to him about his love and suffering and his true love which he has lost. She had something else in mind from the look on her face.

Abuelo has the inside track on the honey moon pleasures of Feo and Gabi while Sarita and Sofia seems genuinely surprised. The pretty maid Natalia comes for Jimena's dinner which she takes up to the bedroom and surprises Oscar who is still kneeling at Jimena's side. Oscar begs her not to sound the alarm that he is there. Natalia says she won't say anything about him. He kisses the comatose one and gives her a blessing while Natalia looks on sweetly.

Sofia snuffles over some baby sweater and decides she will go out into the dry ice forest once again looking for her lost baby.

Oscar returns to the luxury digs with Franco looking really comfortable in this new found hacienda living. Sofia breaks in to claim they are hiding Juan and her daughter.

Speaking of the occult, Juan strolls with the Doctora in the woods when he suddenly hears a woman screaming, Juan. The look on his face is straight out horrified as a thought painfully pierces his brain, that name sounds familiar, or a woman screaming at me sounds familiar. Perhaps both?
******************
Doctora tries to stroke him as a Mom and her truculent son come out of the bush and we know which Juan is being sought. But Juan still sounds so familiar says the big J to his companion.

Sofia playing La Llorona to the hilt accuses F and O of hiding Juan and begins a search of the new rooms. The hacienda is so much bigger than the bakery of old that it takes some time. She looks really suspicious at the pantry then strokes the raw bread buns provocatively then angers, then saddens, then cries, lots, Franco and Oscar watch her come back and don't seem surprised that she can't find Juan here. They try to comfort her as she can't stop crying.

The Doctora continues walking with Juan who still has no shirt or shoes as she looks for an opening to jump him. The Evil medicine man is warned that Juan's good works are going to spoil these villagers and they won't like being beaten so much. Is it the same or another shaman that chants Nahuatl words, but the brujo scene is offset while the doctora and Juan discuss the good that the vaccines will do for the poor villagers. Suddenly a woman begins to give birth and Juan wants to get Silvester. Not flustered at all the Doctora calmly prepares to assist the woman giving birth and Juan turns into an instant birthing coach telling her when to push and when to breath. The miracle of birth and a perfect baby in seconds amazes Juan as it does the viewer. Juan begins to withdraw but they push the baby into his arms, Doctora acting like it might serve as a stimulating sex toy, no that can't be it.

Sofia hugs the sweater and cries for her baby. Juan hugs the baby who cries, the real mother begins to say my daughter, my daughter, echoed by Sofia while Juan has some kind of memory or second sight of Sofia in her drab black, snotting on the white baby sweater. [Egad, I hate this stolen baby plot devices, they really upset me and I know that JudyB doesn't hold truck with them either. Especially since we know that Feo let little Luisito live in a cardboard box with a crazy drunk woman who didn't appear to feed him well, what could he be subjecting a helpless newborn to? They could at least show us that she is okay.]
********************
The honeymooners return in a euphoric breathlessness to a pouting Sofia and Sarita who sure haven't been getting any good nookie like Mom has, and Abuelo says he is not surprised considering the ambition of Gabi's new husband. Gabi announces the wedding and the inevitable news that Feo is now lord and master of the entire hacienda.

In the market Eladio speaks for the family giving excellent news that Rigo is getting better. the former friends of Gabi who flirt with him until Natalia shows up and he passes the ladies over to greet the his gift from God. She tells that Gabi returned and has married Feo. Now he is the master of the entire hacienda. She promises Eladio she won't keep any secrets back from him.

Mom with her special mom touch drops the limp hand of Jimena coldly letting it thump lifelessly onto the bed, what a bother, then criticizes the crystal rose which she assumes Sarita has brought in and demands Jimena, Jimena. When Mom leaves, the sombrero shadow on the wall tell us all is seen by an adoring Oscar. He gives her kisses and words of his constancy to love her back to life.
**********************
Franco has the plow and the oxen team under good control. Q arrives with her horse and wagon bed barely under control. But Q comes bearing a five course lunch while they discuss that the missing Oscar has gone to see the comatose Jimena. Q has big plans for their money making scenarios, Franco says sometimes she worries him.

Abuelo and Pablito make a brief appearance about nothing important.

Gabi looks at Juan Jose Robles photo and remembers how handsome he was she dreamily says he was her first and only love. She remembers telling Franco how much his father loved her only and not his mother. She then at least tells herself it was all a lie. But Feo loves her and she chants his name in a sexual swoon.

Meantime Feo gets a nightly chance to menace as he shows Oscar divorce papers that Jimena supposedly signed and demands that he act with pride and sign them too. Oscar doesn't want to believe it but why does he sign anyway. Was that a universal macho challenge or what?

Next: Sofia gets to act out her La Llorona role in the dryicy dark of night. Let's see more horses, huh? Damian is apparently going to pursue LL and show us some really nice horses so I guess we get both.

WORD OF THE NIGHT: Jerez = sherry. Also the town of Jerez in southern Spain where the most prestigious sherry is distilled and aged to perfection in oak barrels.

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Querida Enemiga #75 October 7, '08 Sicko Sara Goes Psycho

Alternate title: Delusional, diabolical, despicable and dangerous...what's not to like?

Time Warner was messing with us tonight. Had to update the software before I could get off the MSNBC channel and locate Univision. So the first twenty minutes or so have been patched in from Youtube. Hope I didn't miss anything. Let me know if I did.

Rehash: Sara's having a cozy little chat with Granny. Want to know your real granddaughter's name? she hisses. It's Lorena....the "pelapapas". That's the last bit of news you'll get before you rot in Hell. Downstairs the doorbell is ringing frantically. Lorena wants the dumb maid (Ferro's term but it's right on) to tell Sara she's looking for her. Dumb maid keeps insisting Sara's not here....she's at the office and has telephoned Joaquina for a change of clothes.

Meanwhile, Sara is torturing Hortensia with her own little version of "he loves me, he loves me not" only this time it's" I'm smothering you, I'm not smothering you not." Hortensia is moaning in between pillow smashes and hyperventilating. I keep expecting her to die of a heart attack but the tough old broad hangs in there.

Dumb maid is still protesting that Sara's not there but fortunately Lorena insists on seeing for herself. She rushes up the stairs, pounds mightily on the door and finds that it's locked. Sends dumb maid off for keys while she continues to yell" Sara, I know you're in there. Open up!" As if.

Finally the door is unlocked. Impactada look on Lorena. (I imagine they inserted an ad here but I don't know) Next scene, we see Sara running out through the gate, hopping in the waiting taxi and roaring off.

From one villain to another....Dr. Despicable arrives home and is plenty annoyed when his favorite whipping post is not there with a hot meal. The man is hungry damnit! And that good-for-nothing has left a note that she's at her parents' house.

Lorena is now hovering over Hortensia, asking her if she feels alright. Lots of moaning from Hortensia. The curtain is blowing in the wind so Lorena surmises that Sara jumped out the window.

Now wait just a minute folks. Hortensia's room is on the second floor of a muy grande mansion. You're telling me that Sara jumped out with breaking a leg or something!? She wasn't even limping when she raced to the taxi. Got a little suspension of disbelief FELS style going on here.

Okay, back to the action. Dumb maid is still fussing about what a pest Lorena is being while Lorena looks on wonderingly at Hortensia. You're my grandmother...I never thought I would see you so helpless she muses.

Quick switch to Zulema's house where Maruja is ooohing and aaahing over Diana's baby. When Zulema comes in, Maruja gives them the news about Vasco being felled by a bullet. Zully and Maruja hug, united by their concern for Vasco. Looks like peace is being made between these two old friends.

In the meantime, Lorena asks the maid to get her a glass of water and when she goes, leans over and tells Hortensia that she's her real granddaughter and that Sara is an impostor. Hortensia is flapping her hand a gazillion miles a minute to signal that she understands. Hortensia makes it clear that Sara WAS there and wants to communicate something else but Lorena doesn't think to get paper and pencil.

We break to Erneso (THANK YOU!!!) who's at the culinary institute, reminiscing about golden moments with Lorena. He's remembering when she shoved a hot dog in his mouth and he pretended to hate it and then ordered another. Now maybe I just dated the wrong kind of guys, but the fellows I know would be reminiscing about the last great lovemaking moment....not eating hot dogs. Male readers, what about you? Inquiring minds want to know. And frankly, I wouldn't have minded a rerun of the picnic moment.

Conclusion: Ernesto still has some points. He clearly loves Lorena and hasn't forgotten her in two seconds flat like his other conquests. He' s still in the running as far as I'm concerned.

Lorena, still at Hortensia's bedside, is remonstrating with the maid about leaving Granny alone. Maid explains that Sara orders people around like she's the head honcho and Joaquina had to go because now they have no chauffeur.

Sara, still riding in the taxi is fuming about Lorena being there and foiling her plans to bump off the old lady. Gives the house a call, pretending she's still waiting for Joaquina to arrive with the clothes. Dumb maid has suddenly become brilliant and is able to interpret Lorena's frantic hand signals and lies to Sara that Lorena has left the place. After that, Lorena settles down to await Sara's return, much to the maid's annoyance.

The vigil also continues at Zully's house. Diana's on the phone trying to get to the health center where Vasco is being cared for. Maruja and Zulema hover with her, worrying and praying.

At the office, Greta is slinging her boobs in Omar's face while they ostensibly talk about her computer skills. Fortunately the phone rings, "It's your wife," sighs Greta and once Omar hears the news, he takes off for home. Saved by the bell.

We interrupt this drama for a quickie talk on gastric bypass and stomach stapling with Alonso explaining to the patient that she can lose 13 to 17 pounds in a month and the weight loss will be good for her heart. No mention of the possible complications.

Back to Zully's house. Omar calls Jaime to tell him that God won't let Vasco die and the whole family's praying for him. Maruja is here with us, he adds. Joaquina arrives back at the mansion. Lorena asks if she actually SAW Sara and of course she didn't. That's because Sara was here! insists Lorena. The door was locked from the inside!

Aha...now we're on Univision. Before, that was Youtube. If there was anything squirrelly, I apologize.

Don Toribio is at Catalina's house commenting on the lovely decor. Evidently it was her parents' house and she's kept it just the way they had it. Ickturo comes down and unwillingly shakes Toribio's hand, not even looking at him. Toribio tries to make chitchat, commenting that he's heard Arturo is a great businessman. Imports, mumbles Arturo. Jacqui, in her ever-present sweatpants arrives and says, Is it a party.?...and no one invited me? Whoops...she sees Toribio and says What are you doing here? Then they pretend not to know each other. Then Arturo and Catalina ask for the truth and Toribio clarifies that Jacqui is the ex-wife of his daughter's ex-husband. (the kind of thing you can only say on a soap opera)

We have a mercifully brief scene of Paula and Dario fighting. He came home for lunch. She's not happy. She would have rather met him for lunch. Well he'll be late to dinner. Aha! Another woman! It's inventory time. Hard work. Inventory...inventing is more like it! Inventing excuses while you see another woman. He slams out the door telling her she's unbearable. She snarls at the closed door. We need a marriage counselor with a blowtorch for these two.

Barbara and Jaime finally get to the Health Center and the doc tells them they got the bullet out but Vasco is "muy delicado". When they see him he looks dead, frankly. All they'd need to do is pull up that paper cover a little higher. Barbara and Jaime hold onto each other in parental anguish.

Augusta finally gets back to the mansion and the two maids are all a-twitter because Lorena is still hanging around. "What do you want me to do!? snaps Augusta "I'm going up to Doña Hortensia!" I really like this lady's style.

It's dark and Sara finally arrives home in her own car. There is hissing snake like music as she enters and demands of Lorena What are you doing in MY house?! Sara appears truly psycho as she maintains that she IS the real granddaughter... the Mother Superior told her so! Even when Lorena whips out the DNA tests....Sara is momentarily stunned; then comes back with...You've falsified the evidence! Each one screams at the other to get out and Lorena finally hauls off and slaps Sara hard. You robbed me of my family, my past, Lorena screams. GET OUT! I'm going to crush you like the viper you are! You know me, Sara, I've never hated anyone....but now I hate you.

It just goes on and on. Sara starts hauling out her packet of rancor....You Lorena were always the treasured one, the saint. Because of you I was never adopted. They always preferred you. Lorena counters that Sara's delusional (too true) and that Lorena tried to get the potential parents to adopt both of them. And she chose to stay with her beloved "sister" Sara rather than go off with an adoptive family herself.

Don't play the martyr, snarls Sara. I don't want your pity. It wasn't pity, replies Lorena, it was love....the love of a sister. And I loved you, admits Sara....I loved you....and I hated you. And I abhor you now that you're messing up my plans for my life. You planned to rob me of my family, my past, my life, counters Lorena. So what!?....you never cared about money. You were fine with these third-rate people, reeking of cheap cooking oil. I deserved to be with a rich family. Look at how I'm running the business and ordering these people around while you were happy selling muffins in the street.

When Lorena asserts that Sara and Chalo will pay for their misdeeds, Sara tells her that Chalo's dead....a suicide. One less witness. Or maybe you killed him, charges Lorena. You'd love to blame me for everything, wouldn't you? snarls Sara. If you had a shred of dignity, you'd leave, asserts Lorena. NO, YOU LEAVE!!! screams Sara. How could I not believe the saintly Mother Superior. I AM the true granddaughter. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO THROW ME OUT!

Maybe not, but Doña Hortensia does, says Augusta, clumping down the stairs and waving the "Sara Asesina" paper in her hand. Sara is still uncowed. You wrote that yourself! she snaps, dismissing it.

Finally Lorena has to threaten to call the police and reminds Sara what a scandal it would be if the "chef de moda de la television" was hauled down to the police station. This finally gets through to Sara and between Lorena and Augusta, she's hustled up the stairs to pack up her things. Not without more threats though. You can't hurt me anymore, Lorena assures her. No? I'm just getting started. You're contemptible....and that's what Alonso feels for you also...contempt. This statment stops Sara in tracks.

Alonso knows? she gasps. Alonso is the one who ordered the DNA tests, smirks Lorena. He did it because he never stopped loving me! Sara is briefly crushed but then fires back again....I was ALWAYS better than you, Lorena! If you were, you wouldn't have had to cheat and lie...you could have surpassed me honestly. I hated you and now I ABHOR you, Sara snarls.

There are a couple of brief segues away from all this screaming. One when Toribio and Alonso discuss Catalina and whether or not Paula will be upset that Pops is hanging around with a family that now includes Jacqui. And then a scene with Hortensia where she indicates to Augusta that she wants to see her real granddaughter Lorena again.

Now back to the catfight, with Zully and Omar now added in. Sara tells them she's ashamed of them and they tell her they're equally ashamed of her....she should be in jail! Sara then insults Zully, calling her a cheap cook, a fatty and a pig. Don't insult my mother! yells Lorena and decks Sara. We get that standard "I'll kill you " revenge look from Sara before she heads out to her car. But Lorena snatches the keys away...it's not YOUR car!....and off Sara goes into the night, hauling her suitcase. But she's not beaten and she'll never be beaten!

Brief scene with Rossy on the phone to Julian, musing that if Lorena has gone to the mansion she has surely put Sara in her place. Mom Maruja is so upset she was unable to go to work and Rossy's staying with her.

So neither one of them is at the restaurant when the sauce hits the fan once more. Ernesto's still thinking about Lorena (and eliminating Jimena as a possible consolation prize). He's so distracted he puts the wrong sauce on an entrée and Monica, with her chalk-on-blackboard screech wants to know whassup. If it's Lorena, let Monica help him forget the little chit. So Ernesto hauls her off for a talking-to. I should never have slept with you. What!?? cries a lurking Raimundo. Pop is plenty mad. He cut Ernesto slack about his womanizing but he never expected him to use and abuse his daughter! Get out and get out now! Monica begs Dad not to run him off and he tells her to hush! and what kind of woman is she not to make herself respected!? The kitchen staff is upset for sure but Ernesto is out of there.

Lorena is now back at Zully's house but we know that Omar has stayed behind. Sara has evidently found a taxi in the middle of nowhere (thank God for cellphones) and is in some little pension room, vowing revenge and planning to have everyone involved crying "lagrimas de sangre". You'll pay for this humiliation, Lorena! If you want war, you'll get war.

Brief scene with Diana feeding an incredibly noisy, slurping little baby and wishing she could be with Vasco, caring for him. True telenovela style....at the same moment Vasco weakly murmurs Diana's name. Barbara, who's been wiping his forehead with a cloth, then wipes his mouth with the same cloth. Hmmm. Trying to wipe those words away?

And our final scene is a winner. Omar has sent off Augusta so he can have a heart to heart with his weeping mom. I don't know if Zulema will ever forgive you, he says gently. But Lorena will....she's a good girl. And I want no more bitteness and rancor. I've forgiven Jaime and I forgive you....MAMA. Hortensia weeps some more and looks meaningfully at Omar. And I'm a sentimental fool and weep right along with her. THE END


Except it isn't. Not even "ultimas semanas" so we know Sara has lots more evil doings in store. Probably Bruno as well. The previews show Sara vowing to get everything back, INCLUDING ALONSO (You go girl! Leave Ernesto to Lorena though, please)....and there's a scene where Sara shows up at Alonso's door. (Really this guy needs to move and get an unlisted number). So stayed tuned.

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El Cuerpo del Deseo, Mon., Oct. 6 - cold hands but intense eyes and a hot bod - PJ/S shakes things up at the Donoso house

PJ/S meets his daughter, Ángela. She had intended to fire him but after seeing his smoldering gaze, she decides he can stay.

PJ/S hears psychic barking from Azur.

PJ/S shakes hands with Antonio (it's funny how PJ/S calls Antonio and Simón, 'joven,' meaning, 'young man.' You would expect to hear that from a much older man than Salvador appears to be.) Anyway, Antonio says that PJ/S's hand was so cold that it felt like his hand was burning and his veins froze. Antonio does not take to PJ/S and wants to keep Ángela away from him.

A new look for the repulsive Rebeca. When PJ/S is driving her, she tells him a lot of lies about how PJ asked her to come to his house and even wanted to marry her. Then she pretends to have social engagements while ignoring what she is supposed to do as administrator of the house.

PJ/S smiles at the thought that soon he will see Isabel. He is sure that however disappointing his encounters as Salvador have been with the other people he left behind, Isabel would never betray him.

Isabel tells Valeria that she should leave the house.

Gaetana has an exciting birthday and tell PJ/S that she is afraid of him. She doesn't think he is really PJ and that people don't take over other people's body for a good reason. PJ/S says that he was given this opportunity to make things right that he left behind and he is going to take it.

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Fuego, Monday 10/6 (#112): Juan makes gorilla cookies

Feo and Gabi have just formalized their engagement. Nobody feels much like toasting the happy couple, so Gabi lays a guilt trip on them. Sofi stiffly wishes them well and Sarita grudgingly follows suit. Grandpa, clutching Sofía's hand, says nothing. The two daughters take tiny sips of their champagne, then look away disgustedly as Gabi and Feo seemingly proceed to consummate their engagement right there.

Now we embark upon a montage with pan-pipe accompaniment:
  • Juan bonds with the tribe in a barn-raising party.
  • Franco, Q, and Pablito work the fields.
  • Rigo and his family move in with the Reyes.
  • Juan bounces a new baby happily until he remembers something he can't quite remember.
  • Sofi and Sarita make big bucks at their trinket shop. Eva brings Pablito by for some hugs.
  • Rosario continues to be worshiped as a goddess at the Bad Love Bar.
  • Juan verbally defends the tribe against the toothless government guy and the dimestore shaman.
  • Franco tries to talk to Sarita, and she rebuffs him, not letting him see her tears of regret.
  • Franco & co. do more serenades.
  • Sofi prays some more for the safe return of her child.
Juan totes water and firewood, and corrects the breadmaker's technique. Suddenly, he has a flashback about Libia's tomb, the "FR" tree, three little boys with bandannas on their heads, and a glowing lily. He keels over from the shock, landing headfirst in the dough (woohoo! Gorilla cookies with hair!!) and then lands on his ass, screaming in pain.

"Days later," as the caption says, a strange hairy man rides into Serdán on a beautiful white horse. Wait, that's no strange hairy man - it's Oscar with whiskers. There is much rejoicing. Tadeo approaches him eagerly, hoping for good news, but the look in Oscar's eyes betrays disappointment. The townsfolk stand around expectantly. Franco runs to greet him. Eva begs for a happy report. Oscar is silent for a long time as everyone waits tensely. Finally he shakes his head and hugs Franco.

I keep wishing he had hung around the tribal village just long enough for a shave.

Juan tells Silvestre and his crowd of onlookers that he doesn't know where he learned how to bake bread. He's already got a big trayful of several varieties, which he hands out to everyone.

Back in Serdan, Oscar tells them he searched all over and found no sign of either Juan or the child. Sofía shows up a split-second later with Grandpa and Sarita, and Oscar repeats that he didn't find them. Sofi goes into hysterics and begs for it not to be true. Everyone is crying.

Juan's still kneading the dough, working it like a madman. He seems very concerned that the village will run out of bread. He has Silvestre stoke the oven. (Evidently, Silvestre is the only helpful person in this village.)

(Aerial shot of the Hacienda Agustín shows a utility pole right out front, perfect for posting a "lost baby" flyer...)

Sarita tells Grandpa that her mother and Feo left early for Puebla. Grandpa knows why. Sure enough, a judge in the state capital is declaring them married at this very moment. Next thing, they're in bed and it's so gross. He's saying "now you're mine, all mine until we're separated by death." Well, how long can that be?

Dr. Leonora watches Juan toss and turn in his sleep. Just like she learned in med school, she takes her clothes off (I see she's wearing a thong because you wanna be extra-sexy and uncomfortable when you're in the middle of nowhere) and gets into bed with him and takes his oblivious sleepy hand.

Meanwhile, Sofía reprises her Wuthering Heights La Llorona act, wandering the misty moors Dry Ice Woods (previously the Rape Forest), gnashing her teeth and crying for Heathcliff Juan and her child. She encounters a mysterious man, former Dancing With The Stars contestant Cristian de la Fuente, on a white horse. He gets down for a better look, but she has already disappeared into the fog.

At Las Barrancas ("The Ravines"), as the tribal village is apparently called, Juan sleepily takes the Doctora in his arms and kisses her. Then he realizes that she's not... whoever it is that he doesn't remember... and hastily pushes her away and tells her to get dressed. He can't be with her because he doesn't know who he is or where he came from. (She is watching him put his pants on, he's still wearing those black underpants, I keep wondering if she's going to call him Ralph or Calvin based on whatever name is on the tag.) He needs time to remember if he's got a girlfriend or anything. What if he never remembers anything, she asks? He says in that case, maybe he'll stay here and maybe they'll have a relationship. But he just wants time.

Sofi plays with her bell collection and remembers the Dancing Star she saw in the woods. "That man's not from around here. I've never seen him before. Who could he be?"

He's a guy who's staying in a nice place, petting a dog, and looking at an old framed photo of a blond woman and a little girl (looks like Gina from QE) and a little boy. He wonders who that woman in the mist could be.

Sofía lights a candle and remembers Oscar saying he didn't find Juan and the baby. She decides to go looking for the child herself. But evidently not tonight.

Oscar tells Franco he had a funny feeling that Juan had been at this Ravines place, even searched the place from hut to hut, but maybe his compulsion to find Juan made him a little goofy. Franco hesitantly raises the possibility that Juan could be dead.

Juan, smeared in flour, is sniffing one of his world-famous conchas. He's about to take a bite when some guy shows up and tells Juan he's a señalado (a "sign" - a prophet? a prophecy?). He's humble, but he's a señalado. Not just because he saved the doctora's life, but because of the light in his eyes and his great strength. Juan says he's just a guy with no past; he's lost. The guy says that when one feels lost, he should listen to his heart for the answer. His past is in his hands, and the seed he planted in his past will become his future.

Some time later (I'll skipping ahead for storytelling convenience), Juan chases the wise man and asks him to repeat what he said. He tells Juan that men aren't the masters of their own destinies. When they wander off their marked path, something always brings them back. Juan asks, what if they have nothing and nowhere to go back to? In that case, they have to work with what they've got and try to go on. Juan seems unhappy with this advice.

Still later, Juan tells the wise man he can't be happy if he doesn't know his past or who he is. Wise man says nobody really knows who he is, so no need to get all worked up about it. Juan says, "I feel like I've met you before, and all that you're saying, I've heard it before from someone like you." But he can't remember.

Sofi prays some more about finding her child. She still thinks Juan took her away, and with her, all of Sofi's hopes and dreams. Without her daughter, she's nobody. She's a woman without a present and without a future and without a past. (Damn, if only she had that seed the wise man was talking about!)

The Robles-Reyes crops are coming in nicely. Franco says there were times he felt like throwing in the towel, what with all the problems. On one side, Sofi was blaming Juan for stealing their child. On the other side, Gabi was putting their crops at risk. Quintina kept him going, and they got their water back, and they started a serenading business, which had been Oscar's idea in the first place. Oscar's very proud of what Franco was able to accomplish on his own.

Oscar asks about Jimena. Franco says she's had nervous breakdown and word is her mom wants to have her committed.

(And now a cell phone ad featuring La Llorona. She warns travelers that this roadway is a DEAD zone. All of their messages will be lost! Waaaaaah!)

Oscar's upset about Gabi's plan to put Jimena away. Then Franco updates Oscar about that whole business with the water pump at the spring and their father signing it over to her and how she claims he was in love with her, which we know is the opposite of what really happened, and Oscar doesn't buy it either.

Feo notes the change in Gabriela - she no longer has that air of bitterness. She credits him for the change. He suggests that they get dressed and go for a stroll, but Gabi wants to just hang around and screw. She says they won't be able to enjoy their happiness in the city with everyone watching and judging them. And now she's ready for some more sugar. (Dude, she's going to break it!)

Franco and Oscar agree there's no way their dad was ever in love with Gabi, but they wonder why he signed over the rights to the spring. Oscar misses Jimena, but he's worried that if he visits her she'll get worse. Franco suggests talking to Eva to find out what's going on.

Franco again admits he's worried that Juan could be dead, but he's not ready to give up, and he wants to go search for Juan himself. Oscar says they should wait for the crop to come in, and then resume the search together.

They wonder if they should reserve the pastures for grazing, or if they should plant something there. Just then, the Dancing Star comes along and introduces himself as Damián Ferrer. He offers to rent their pastures because he raises horses who need a place to graze. He says they can name their price. Oscar coolly says he'll think about it.

Oscar and Franco step aside to discuss. Oscar of course wants to get big bucks out of the guy, while Franco warns him not to be greedy and wants only what's fair. Oscar says that because Juan wants them to be honorable, he'll do that, but just this time.

Grandpa works out a document with some lawyer saying Feo can have no control over Grandpa's assets, nor over any part of the hacienda that belongs to him. (As I recall, Grandpa still owns 20% of the hacienda that never belonged to Bernardo.) If Feo tries anything with Grandpa's things, he'll be committing a very serious crime. Grandpa gloats.

Feo is thought-bubbling in bed that he enjoys Gabi's passion, but he enjoys her money even more. Gabi asks why he's looking at her that way. He says he's thinking how much he loves her and how happy they'll be.

Oscar and Franco show Damián into the hacienda to discuss price; he'll pay more than a reasonable amount if that's what they need. Oscar starts to agree that that's a great idea, but Franco cuts him off and says no, of course it'll be a fair price and not a cent more. Then Quintina shows up and is impactada at his handsomeness. He smiles in a friendly way and doesn't even blink at her clown-lips. He kisses her hand and she swoons. She says she's in love and demonstrates swoons a few more times.

El Ex-Jefe gets a visit from Coyote, who says he looked everywhere and didn't find Juan, it's like the earth swallowed him up. Ex-Jefe tells him to continue watching out for the Reyes and also keep an eye on Feo. He doesn't believe a word of Feo's version of what happened that night, and if he dared to lie, they'll find out sooner or later and Feo will be sorry.

The sooner-or-later-to-be-sorry man is bragging to Gabi that he's going to make the hacienda the most productive in the region and show everyone that he married for love, not for money like they all think. They'll find out who Feonando Escandon is and and what he's capable of doing for his wife's love.

She moans that she's soooo happy. He wants to go back to the hacienda now and tell everybody about their wedding. She wants to stay at the hotel para siempre. When they get back to the hacienda it'll be all the problems again. He says she doesn't have to worry about any of that, he'll take care of everything, all he cares about is her welfare, peace, and health. "You won't be sorry." She gets horny again.

Sofi tells Jimena that Oscar came back. She hopes that will get a reaction out of Jimena. Jimena doesn't react, which Sofía muses could either mean that Jimena doesn't care, or else she does care but can't show it. "How we've suffered," Sofía says. The three of them have suffered, and they don't deserve it. Oscar came back without Juan and without the baby, she says. He said he couldn't find them, but she's not going to give up. She'll keep looking for her child and never give up. Never!

Mexico airdate: 24 de Junio
Word of the day: Agobiarse = to suffocate, become anxious, get uptight/worked up.
Next time: Sofi calls Juan on the Psychic Friend Hotline. Only, maybe it's not what it seems, because it looks as though Dr. Leonora can hear Sofía too.

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