Saturday, August 15, 2009
Gancho Friday August 14th. The Shortest Fraudulent Doctor Report on Record
In the continuing game of cat and mouse between our two strong-willed heroes, Moni had gotten the idea (not dispelled at all by Mauricio) that Mauricio really likes submissive women, such as geishas, who speak quietly and are totally subservient to their men. Moni was offended, of course, so she somehow dressed up as a geisha to spice up Mau’s meeting with the Japanese investors. She ended up teaching the other geishas some ghetto moves, and the investors liked her so much, now they want to take her back to Japan. Moni protests, but Mau starts toying with Moni, to pay her back for her stunt. He tells the investors they can have Moni as a souvenir, tells Moni she could learn to be a sumo wrestler, and don’t forget to send postcards. Moni’s distraught, it was only a joke, and you, Mau always take everything I say so seriously, would you really send me to Japan, don’t you care about me? Mau reassures her that she knows how much he cares about her, and they again move close for a possible kiss. Moni says she’s shaking, and Mau thinks it’s his charm, but it’s actually his cell, in Moni’s pocket, set on vibrate! It’s Doctor Perales, Mau has to go for the results of his exam, so he leaves, and Moni and Sal also skeedaddle, leaving the befuddled investors muy confundidos.
Jerry’s counting his millions, but Oscar counsels caution, saying “No te me aloques que te necesito cuerdo” (Don’t make yourself crazy when I need you sane), which his father used to say when he locked him in his room. Seems Oscar’s father was quite strict, and Oscar says he was a good man, at least he never touched Oscar when he was sober (!! ) - so here we get an insight into the roots of Oscar’s evil). He then hints that if Jerry’s in such a rush for his money, well, brakes have been known to fail, and Mau likes to drive, hint, hint. Jerry’s a little shocked, he doesn’t want to kill Mau, he’s family, just take away his company, his girlfriend, his money, his house, his desk….Oh, is that all? asks Oscar. Oscar says he was just joking about the killing, you get it, right, buddy? He playfully slaps Jero on the arm, but Jero’s not laughing anymore.
Remember how Ximena’s in hiding from the baddies, since she knows the truth about Moni/Beto, but doesn’t want to betray her amigas? Tano took her to his Mom’s house, and Ximmy’s appreciative. She asked Tano’s Mom for a bulletproof vest (un chaleco antibalas), and the Mom lent her a nice plaid overcoat. Tano wants to keep guarding her, and invites her to lunch, when Ximmy’s phone rings, and she remarks it’s just like a telenovela! Which it is, as Rolu’s calling, and Ximmy, without thinking, tells HIM she has a secret. Of course, Rolu will now help protect her, leaving Tano out in the cold again.
Connie has secured some school uniforms for the kids, and they don’t like them one bit. Luisa has to wear a gray pleated Heidi-type dress over a white, short-sleeved puffed blouse, white knee socks and plain black flats, and it looks very childish. Also, the shoes are too tight. Connie says tough, that’s your uniform. Aldo comes in, and his white shirt and gray pants are three sizes too big. Not only does he hate the outfit, but he doesn’t want to go to the new school, and might not even get in, due to the exam. Connie hints that the kids are already admitted (she has pull) and says the clothes look great. Okay, you like them, take them, says Aldo, and he strips off his shirt and pants, leaving him in his boxers. Of course Mauricio shows up on cue, so that when Aldo goes to his room, Connie says Aldo’s crazy, they’ll have to get a specialist. Speaking of doctors, Mau says his doctor wants to see him personally.
Cut to the coffee room, as Beto is forcing Paula to list all the people whose names start with “M”, in an attempt to track down whomever wrote the letter to Moni. Jerry enters, remarks that Beto and Moni, if they’re siblings, they sure don’t resemble each other, and boy, is that Monita hot! This immediately infuriates Beto, who grabs Jerry by the hair and twists his arm behind his back. Paula rushes out to tell Gabi, who says call security. Paula reminds her that Beto IS security. Well, of course Moni shows up, and immediately separates the boys (without even having to knock them out this time!).
At Mauricio’s house, Doctor Perales has arrived to give Mau the results personally. Connie’s at Mau’s side, and Teresa is secretly eavesdropping. The results are a little discouraging (desalentador). Señor Sermeño, you have very little time left to live! Impactados all around.
Beto explains that he was upset about Moni’s “crime”. He holds up the letter, taped together, with the mysterious letter “M”. Who sent it? Well, Gabriela, of course, says Paula. Beto’s no dummy. He knows Gabriela begins with a “J”. Paula saves the day, explaining that Gabi’s real name is Marcela, she just doesn’t like that name. Right, adds Moni, it was just a party for the receptionists, and look how you overreacted, Beto. Beto starts to protest as to why Paula was making the list of people with the names starting with “M” when Salvador comes in. Beto’s mistreatment of the company Vice-President is not going to cost him his job. However, he’s back to cleaning crew, scratchy suit and all.
The doctor confirms Mau’s problem (never defined, I guess it’s some kind of tumor), and they’re going to do more studies, but it doesn’t look good.
Rolu and Ximmy, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g. Well, actually, they’re in his car, and the music is smokin’, too. She breathlessly starts to tell her secret, bringing up Moni and Beto, but before she actually spills the beans, she flashes 38 spy movies, realizes that Rolu is allied with Connie and Jerry, and she wanted their relationship to be transparent, clear like the waters off Cancun, but his dirty dealings are muddying the waters, so she can’t tell, and Adiós! she’s gone. Yes, Rolu has just received the Ximena treatment.
Gabi and Paula have some words, basically a power play, after which we see some feet approaching Gabi’s desk. In high heels. Topped by a red dress, big gold necklaces, and a shocking red wig, it’s Lorenza, with her new look! She’s quite scary, and Gabi is indeed scared, stutters that Sal’s out at the moment. But Lorenza came to see Gabi! Uh oh.
Ximmy’s on the run again, arriving at the vecindad she begs Estrella to hide her. It’s just like a movie, she tells Estre. The pretty heroine knows this big “Top Secret” information, and the whole world is after her, wanting to kill her. And then she’s kissing her handsome boyfriend, when she realizes, he wants to kill her, too! Yes, Ximmy is living her own movie, and we’re enjoying every minute of it. Estre stashes her in her apartment. Rolu arrives two seconds later, but our clever actress bats her eyes, figuring Rolu will be putty in her hands.
Lorenza smelled perfume on Salvador’s clothes the other night, he must have a lover! And she must work in this office. Well, says Gabi, everyone here already has a lover, I do, Paula does, etc. Fine, but you’ll have to be my eyes and ears and find out who Sal’s lover is. We’ll be working together, okay? Sure, fine, assures Gabi weakly, ushering our loca roja into the elevator, then reminding herself to change perfumes pronto.
Well, Rolu’s not really putty, in fact he’s throwing a few zingers of his own, trying to charm Estrella. When she says he’s moving too fast, he says he’s a race driver, and he likes curves. After she denies knowing any Ximena, he says to call if Ximena does show up, and he’ll arrive without brake fluid, so nothing will stop him. He leaves, but we see that Estrella’s pheremones have once again been activated, and when Ximena comes out, Estre admits that Rolu was tempting her more than a little, which amuses Ximmy.
Why is this happening to ME? These are the kind words by which caring Connie comforts morose Mauricio. She’s frantic, he’s quiet. She wants to wake up from this nightmare. And what about the kids, just when they’re starting to behave (could she be any worse?). Mau’s not paying attention, but when she mentions the niños, he says, right, I HAVE to adopt them, right away. Our sensitive lady says don’t think about them now, but by the way, if you want it, I’m ready to get married to you whenever you say the word. And there’s no time to lose. HUH? says Mau, looking at Connie as if she’s from another planeta (maybe Urananus, is that how you spell it? :). She runs out, a little flustered as to how poorly she’s handling this.
Teresa is muy triste, and Luisa asks what’s wrong. Terry says don’t worry, it’s grown-up things, and Luisa goes to check on lunch. Mauricio sees Terry crying. She admits that she heard everything, and he comforts her, asking her to keep the matter quiet. He wants to be alone, to think. He goes back to his room, and she clasps her hands in silent prayer.
After the commercial, it’s Beto time! He’s back to the cleaning uniform which matches Paula’s, but the pants itch so much that they’re down around his ankles, and we get to admire his blue and white boxers. When he complains to Paula, she says he should be happy he doesn’t have to clean the bathroom of the accountants, because then they’d be “counting” on him, and he couldn’t hide and slack off, as he’s able to do here. His job now is to clean Mauricio’s office, and Paula warns him not to touch anything. He goes grumbling off, as Pau hopes he won’t cost her to lose her business career.
Mauricio is walking along in a random park in Mexico City, deep in contemplation. Monita is also walking along in some park, and surprise, it’s the same one, she sees him, and they hug. Coincidence? I think not.
Connie’s having second thoughts. Remember how she was reluctant to go along with the fake pregnancy? Well, she’s reluctant about the fake doctor’s report, too, and calls Jerry to lament as to how sad it’s making Maury. This farce has gone beyond (superado) what she wanted, she feels like a bitch. You ARE a bitch, but a pretty one, replies Jerry, handing the phone to Oscar. Oscar tells her to shut up and do her job, or they’ll tell Mau. This makes her indignant, she’ll tell him first, and we’ll see who comes out worse. She calls out “Mauricio”, not knowing that he’s not home, having gone to a random park, and randomly having run into La Monita.
Okay, it wasn’t all THAT random. Teresa told Moni that when Mau gets sad, he goes to this park, so…..okay, I’ll buy it. By the way, Moni’s wearing pants today, wonder if there’s a reason. Mau says his Dad took him here as a kid, and this place calms him down. But he doesn’t want to die. Moni’s optimistic, don’t listen to those doctors, one guy in her neighborhood was told by doctors he had three months left to live, and you know what? Next day, he went out in the street and was hit by a bus! This brings a smile to Mau’s face. However, what really worries him is what will happen to the kids. Just adopt them, says Moni. But I’d have to get married. Then get married. Mau looks her in the eyes, says “Monita, marry me”. Her hands come to her face as she looks at him with a mixture of surprise, hope and love, and his warm gaze returns the love, and gets all our hearts a thumpin’.
So, does she say yes? Well, of course, before she can say a word, Mau’s cell rings, and he thinks Moni has a deal with the cell phone companies. It’s Salvador, Terry told him the news, and he advises Mau to get a second opinion (which to me, is a telenovela first, I mean what’s that gonna do to all the hardworking corrupt doctors? Speaking of which, it’s amazing how badly novelas portray doctors. In my first novela, Destilando Amor, a doc agreed to tell the hero his wife was pregnant by artificial insemination, when really, she’d had an affair. Then we had Matasanos in FELS, ready with any diagnosis requested by the evil Crabiela, all for the right price, of course. And over on MEPS, Dr. Obregon had no problem consigning a young girl to the manicomio, although he’s a little repentent now. And when the doctors aren’t corrupt, they’re inept. But they can learn fast, such as Alonso on Querida Enemiga (gastric bypass learned in Canada in a few months) or Juan Miguel on Cuidado con el Angel, who learned eye surgery pretty fast (for a psychiatrist!).
Anyway, Salvador insists that Mau see Doctor Camarena, and has already made the appointment, get over there NOW. Mau tells Moni, and she’s totally in agreement, get a second opinion, some lady in her neighborhood was told by a doctor she was in bad shape, and a “healer” cured her the next day! (Hmmm. See my rant above). They’re off to his appointment.
Connie sees Salvador talking to Teresa, and demands to know where Mauricio is. They’re not telling, and Connie wants to know why he’s against her. He’s not against her, he’s FOR Mauricio, and will be ‘til the end. Terry smiles, and when Connie questions this, she says she’s glad Mauricio is now surrounded by people who REALLY care for him.
In the GOOD doctor’s office, he says they’ll do a lab study (estudio de gabinete, literally “cabinet”, but it means laboratory in this instance), and we have a montage, accompanied by “hopeful” sounding piano chords, with them taking blood, Mau on the table with a lot of electrodes attached for an EKG, Sal and Moni concerned, arms around each other in support, Mau’s dressed now, back in the office, as the doc must be giving him the results, and his face breaks out in a smile – everything’s okay!
And just like that, they’re back in Mau’s office, and another problem is solved in one episode. He tells Sal and Moni there’s not one thing wrong with him. Sal wants to pursue why Perales was such an alarmist, something doesn’t add up, but Mau is sort of grateful, he now feels rejuvenated, and wants to remake his life. He starts to tell Moni how he feels, but she interrupts, says she knows what he said in the park doesn’t count now, things have changed, and he doesn’t quite get the chance to clear this up, as she says he should call Terry to relieve her anguish, which he does. After Terry is reassured, Moni, Mau and Sal again wonder how such a renowned doctor as Perales could have been so wrong, and Sal thinks it was no accident. He has his suspicions, and again, thinks it has something to do with the adoption.
In Jerry’s office, Oscar is holding up the earphone receiver, and he and Jerry, listening to every word from Mau’s office, realize the jig is up. Jerry wants to flee, but Oscar wants to hear more. They listen in, and hear Mau say he has a pending appointment with Dr. Perales, he’ll go, see what Perales says, and confront him. Sal wants to call the police, but Moni goes with Mau’s plan, and she’ll go with him, who needs police, she’ll handle the Doctor herself. Jerry tries to call Perales to warn him, but he doesn’t answer, so the race is on – who’ll get to Perales first?
The bad guys, of course, as we cut to the parking lot of a medical center, said Perales walks up the steps toward his office, and is met by Jerry and Oscar, who tell him Mauricio is on to him, he’d better come with them. Perales says he knew this was crazy, now he wants double. You’ll get a double kick in the rear if you don’t come with us now, says Jero. No way, says the Doc, as he headbutts both Jerry and Oscar, and rushes back to the parking lot. Mau and Moni zoom into the lot in Mau’s car, screeching to a stop to avoid hitting a pedestrian, but it’s the Doc! They jump out of the car, as Mau yells Run, Moni, Run! The chase is on, and now I see why Moni wore pants today.
Meanwhile, back at the office, we hear an uncensored fart, as Beto exits the bathroom (of Mau’s office), complaining why can’t he read his wrestling mag in peace, and Paula says he’s stinking up (apestando) the whole office. It took her a year to be allowed to clean this office, so he shouldn’t complain, now get this office clean and shiny. She leaves, and he diligently cleans the entire office….NOT. He drops the mop, drops the mag, and drops himself down into Mauricio’s chair. With his sneaker-clad feet on the desk, he dreams of being a bigwig, presses the intercom, says “take a memo, double the salary of Roberto Ochoa. Make that triple! Or better yet, what comes after triple?” He’s rudely interrupted by Gabi’s voice, remove your hands from that apparatus, or I’ll cut off your fingers with my fingernail clippers! Beto looks around, where’d that voice come from?
Estrella is warning Ximmy about Rolu. He doesn’t play clean. You mean he doesn’t bathe? asks our hiding heroine. No, he’s a vivales (someone only looking out for himself), or at least he looks (pinta) like one. Ximmy thinks he looks like a hunk (un cuero – literally a piece of leather), and has some cool, dark secrets, one of which she proceeds to whisper in Estre’s ear. Estre really wants Ximmy to think twice about Rolu, Ximmy can’t keep running forever. But for now, go back to the apartment, watch TV, try on some clothes, whatever, we’ll figure this out. Ximmy hugs her amiguita.
Speaking of running forever, Doctor Perales, who’s a big guy, is running through a park (same one they used for the Mau-Moni scene?), hiding behind some little trees, as the keystone cop music plays. Okay, now what’s wrong with this scene? Perales is going pretty fast, Moni’s zipping along in pursuit, and Mauricio (there’s nothing wrong with him, remember?), a tall young man in excellent shape, is the one who’s out of breath. Anyway, Perales ducks behind a tree, Moni runs right past (we also see she’s not wearing heels today, how convenient), but Mau catches up with the Doc, and demands to know who paid him. Talk!
Meanwhile back in the office, Gabi answers the phone, and it’s Lorenza. Again. She’s been calling every 15 minutes to find out who Sal’s seeing, and Gabi’s fed up. She tells Sal to do something. She tells Lorzena she can’t talk now, the lazy bum (zanguango) is here, and hangs up. Sal wonders, who’s the zanguango? It’s you, your wife said to use that code name for you, so as not to arouse suspicions. But you have to do something. Sal says they changed Lorenza’s meds, now she’s less psychotic, but more paranoid, which do you think is better? Why not just lock her up? replies Gabi.
Connie arrives, where’s Mau? They’re not telling, so she’ll wait in the office. She enters, and there’s Beto asleep in the chair, feet on the desk. She scolds him, but he wakes up, and immediately turns the tables. When she asks what’s with the uniform he’s wearing, he says he hopes she’ll take it off him, he stands up, pulls her close, starts stroking her hips. She pushes him away, don’t start. He can’t resist, you start me up, kisses her neck, lifts her off her feet, putting her down on the desk on her back, and starts kissing her neck again, going lower and lower! You’re like an octopus, she moans, please, no! He starts licking her neck, you say no, but your body says YES! The door opens, it’s Gabi and Sal, and this time, Connie and Beto are caught in flagrante delicto!
Previews: Lorenza’s back to her old hairstyle, demands Jerry tell her who’s the hussy. La Monita, he answers, and we see Lor’s car bearing down on an unsuspecting Moni. Look out!
Vocabulario:
No te me aloques que te necesito cuerdo – Don’t make yourself crazy when I need you sane
Un chaleco antibalas – a bulletproof vest
Desalentador – discouraging, disheartening
Superar – to go beyond, exceed something
Estudio de gabinete – laboratory study, gabinete can mean cabinet, office or laboratory
Vivales- someone who’s only looking out for himself
Un cuero – slang word for a hunk, also means leather
Zanguango – a lazy bum
BTW, when I couldn’t find some of these terms in the big Oxford dictionary, I was able to find them in El Pequeño Larousse Ilustrado, a Spanish-Spanish dictionary/encyclopedia, with lots of pictures, which I highly recommend.
Jerry’s counting his millions, but Oscar counsels caution, saying “No te me aloques que te necesito cuerdo” (Don’t make yourself crazy when I need you sane), which his father used to say when he locked him in his room. Seems Oscar’s father was quite strict, and Oscar says he was a good man, at least he never touched Oscar when he was sober (!! ) - so here we get an insight into the roots of Oscar’s evil). He then hints that if Jerry’s in such a rush for his money, well, brakes have been known to fail, and Mau likes to drive, hint, hint. Jerry’s a little shocked, he doesn’t want to kill Mau, he’s family, just take away his company, his girlfriend, his money, his house, his desk….Oh, is that all? asks Oscar. Oscar says he was just joking about the killing, you get it, right, buddy? He playfully slaps Jero on the arm, but Jero’s not laughing anymore.
Remember how Ximena’s in hiding from the baddies, since she knows the truth about Moni/Beto, but doesn’t want to betray her amigas? Tano took her to his Mom’s house, and Ximmy’s appreciative. She asked Tano’s Mom for a bulletproof vest (un chaleco antibalas), and the Mom lent her a nice plaid overcoat. Tano wants to keep guarding her, and invites her to lunch, when Ximmy’s phone rings, and she remarks it’s just like a telenovela! Which it is, as Rolu’s calling, and Ximmy, without thinking, tells HIM she has a secret. Of course, Rolu will now help protect her, leaving Tano out in the cold again.
Connie has secured some school uniforms for the kids, and they don’t like them one bit. Luisa has to wear a gray pleated Heidi-type dress over a white, short-sleeved puffed blouse, white knee socks and plain black flats, and it looks very childish. Also, the shoes are too tight. Connie says tough, that’s your uniform. Aldo comes in, and his white shirt and gray pants are three sizes too big. Not only does he hate the outfit, but he doesn’t want to go to the new school, and might not even get in, due to the exam. Connie hints that the kids are already admitted (she has pull) and says the clothes look great. Okay, you like them, take them, says Aldo, and he strips off his shirt and pants, leaving him in his boxers. Of course Mauricio shows up on cue, so that when Aldo goes to his room, Connie says Aldo’s crazy, they’ll have to get a specialist. Speaking of doctors, Mau says his doctor wants to see him personally.
Cut to the coffee room, as Beto is forcing Paula to list all the people whose names start with “M”, in an attempt to track down whomever wrote the letter to Moni. Jerry enters, remarks that Beto and Moni, if they’re siblings, they sure don’t resemble each other, and boy, is that Monita hot! This immediately infuriates Beto, who grabs Jerry by the hair and twists his arm behind his back. Paula rushes out to tell Gabi, who says call security. Paula reminds her that Beto IS security. Well, of course Moni shows up, and immediately separates the boys (without even having to knock them out this time!).
At Mauricio’s house, Doctor Perales has arrived to give Mau the results personally. Connie’s at Mau’s side, and Teresa is secretly eavesdropping. The results are a little discouraging (desalentador). Señor Sermeño, you have very little time left to live! Impactados all around.
Beto explains that he was upset about Moni’s “crime”. He holds up the letter, taped together, with the mysterious letter “M”. Who sent it? Well, Gabriela, of course, says Paula. Beto’s no dummy. He knows Gabriela begins with a “J”. Paula saves the day, explaining that Gabi’s real name is Marcela, she just doesn’t like that name. Right, adds Moni, it was just a party for the receptionists, and look how you overreacted, Beto. Beto starts to protest as to why Paula was making the list of people with the names starting with “M” when Salvador comes in. Beto’s mistreatment of the company Vice-President is not going to cost him his job. However, he’s back to cleaning crew, scratchy suit and all.
The doctor confirms Mau’s problem (never defined, I guess it’s some kind of tumor), and they’re going to do more studies, but it doesn’t look good.
Rolu and Ximmy, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g. Well, actually, they’re in his car, and the music is smokin’, too. She breathlessly starts to tell her secret, bringing up Moni and Beto, but before she actually spills the beans, she flashes 38 spy movies, realizes that Rolu is allied with Connie and Jerry, and she wanted their relationship to be transparent, clear like the waters off Cancun, but his dirty dealings are muddying the waters, so she can’t tell, and Adiós! she’s gone. Yes, Rolu has just received the Ximena treatment.
Gabi and Paula have some words, basically a power play, after which we see some feet approaching Gabi’s desk. In high heels. Topped by a red dress, big gold necklaces, and a shocking red wig, it’s Lorenza, with her new look! She’s quite scary, and Gabi is indeed scared, stutters that Sal’s out at the moment. But Lorenza came to see Gabi! Uh oh.
Ximmy’s on the run again, arriving at the vecindad she begs Estrella to hide her. It’s just like a movie, she tells Estre. The pretty heroine knows this big “Top Secret” information, and the whole world is after her, wanting to kill her. And then she’s kissing her handsome boyfriend, when she realizes, he wants to kill her, too! Yes, Ximmy is living her own movie, and we’re enjoying every minute of it. Estre stashes her in her apartment. Rolu arrives two seconds later, but our clever actress bats her eyes, figuring Rolu will be putty in her hands.
Lorenza smelled perfume on Salvador’s clothes the other night, he must have a lover! And she must work in this office. Well, says Gabi, everyone here already has a lover, I do, Paula does, etc. Fine, but you’ll have to be my eyes and ears and find out who Sal’s lover is. We’ll be working together, okay? Sure, fine, assures Gabi weakly, ushering our loca roja into the elevator, then reminding herself to change perfumes pronto.
Well, Rolu’s not really putty, in fact he’s throwing a few zingers of his own, trying to charm Estrella. When she says he’s moving too fast, he says he’s a race driver, and he likes curves. After she denies knowing any Ximena, he says to call if Ximena does show up, and he’ll arrive without brake fluid, so nothing will stop him. He leaves, but we see that Estrella’s pheremones have once again been activated, and when Ximena comes out, Estre admits that Rolu was tempting her more than a little, which amuses Ximmy.
Why is this happening to ME? These are the kind words by which caring Connie comforts morose Mauricio. She’s frantic, he’s quiet. She wants to wake up from this nightmare. And what about the kids, just when they’re starting to behave (could she be any worse?). Mau’s not paying attention, but when she mentions the niños, he says, right, I HAVE to adopt them, right away. Our sensitive lady says don’t think about them now, but by the way, if you want it, I’m ready to get married to you whenever you say the word. And there’s no time to lose. HUH? says Mau, looking at Connie as if she’s from another planeta (maybe Urananus, is that how you spell it? :). She runs out, a little flustered as to how poorly she’s handling this.
Teresa is muy triste, and Luisa asks what’s wrong. Terry says don’t worry, it’s grown-up things, and Luisa goes to check on lunch. Mauricio sees Terry crying. She admits that she heard everything, and he comforts her, asking her to keep the matter quiet. He wants to be alone, to think. He goes back to his room, and she clasps her hands in silent prayer.
After the commercial, it’s Beto time! He’s back to the cleaning uniform which matches Paula’s, but the pants itch so much that they’re down around his ankles, and we get to admire his blue and white boxers. When he complains to Paula, she says he should be happy he doesn’t have to clean the bathroom of the accountants, because then they’d be “counting” on him, and he couldn’t hide and slack off, as he’s able to do here. His job now is to clean Mauricio’s office, and Paula warns him not to touch anything. He goes grumbling off, as Pau hopes he won’t cost her to lose her business career.
Mauricio is walking along in a random park in Mexico City, deep in contemplation. Monita is also walking along in some park, and surprise, it’s the same one, she sees him, and they hug. Coincidence? I think not.
Connie’s having second thoughts. Remember how she was reluctant to go along with the fake pregnancy? Well, she’s reluctant about the fake doctor’s report, too, and calls Jerry to lament as to how sad it’s making Maury. This farce has gone beyond (superado) what she wanted, she feels like a bitch. You ARE a bitch, but a pretty one, replies Jerry, handing the phone to Oscar. Oscar tells her to shut up and do her job, or they’ll tell Mau. This makes her indignant, she’ll tell him first, and we’ll see who comes out worse. She calls out “Mauricio”, not knowing that he’s not home, having gone to a random park, and randomly having run into La Monita.
Okay, it wasn’t all THAT random. Teresa told Moni that when Mau gets sad, he goes to this park, so…..okay, I’ll buy it. By the way, Moni’s wearing pants today, wonder if there’s a reason. Mau says his Dad took him here as a kid, and this place calms him down. But he doesn’t want to die. Moni’s optimistic, don’t listen to those doctors, one guy in her neighborhood was told by doctors he had three months left to live, and you know what? Next day, he went out in the street and was hit by a bus! This brings a smile to Mau’s face. However, what really worries him is what will happen to the kids. Just adopt them, says Moni. But I’d have to get married. Then get married. Mau looks her in the eyes, says “Monita, marry me”. Her hands come to her face as she looks at him with a mixture of surprise, hope and love, and his warm gaze returns the love, and gets all our hearts a thumpin’.
So, does she say yes? Well, of course, before she can say a word, Mau’s cell rings, and he thinks Moni has a deal with the cell phone companies. It’s Salvador, Terry told him the news, and he advises Mau to get a second opinion (which to me, is a telenovela first, I mean what’s that gonna do to all the hardworking corrupt doctors? Speaking of which, it’s amazing how badly novelas portray doctors. In my first novela, Destilando Amor, a doc agreed to tell the hero his wife was pregnant by artificial insemination, when really, she’d had an affair. Then we had Matasanos in FELS, ready with any diagnosis requested by the evil Crabiela, all for the right price, of course. And over on MEPS, Dr. Obregon had no problem consigning a young girl to the manicomio, although he’s a little repentent now. And when the doctors aren’t corrupt, they’re inept. But they can learn fast, such as Alonso on Querida Enemiga (gastric bypass learned in Canada in a few months) or Juan Miguel on Cuidado con el Angel, who learned eye surgery pretty fast (for a psychiatrist!).
Anyway, Salvador insists that Mau see Doctor Camarena, and has already made the appointment, get over there NOW. Mau tells Moni, and she’s totally in agreement, get a second opinion, some lady in her neighborhood was told by a doctor she was in bad shape, and a “healer” cured her the next day! (Hmmm. See my rant above). They’re off to his appointment.
Connie sees Salvador talking to Teresa, and demands to know where Mauricio is. They’re not telling, and Connie wants to know why he’s against her. He’s not against her, he’s FOR Mauricio, and will be ‘til the end. Terry smiles, and when Connie questions this, she says she’s glad Mauricio is now surrounded by people who REALLY care for him.
In the GOOD doctor’s office, he says they’ll do a lab study (estudio de gabinete, literally “cabinet”, but it means laboratory in this instance), and we have a montage, accompanied by “hopeful” sounding piano chords, with them taking blood, Mau on the table with a lot of electrodes attached for an EKG, Sal and Moni concerned, arms around each other in support, Mau’s dressed now, back in the office, as the doc must be giving him the results, and his face breaks out in a smile – everything’s okay!
And just like that, they’re back in Mau’s office, and another problem is solved in one episode. He tells Sal and Moni there’s not one thing wrong with him. Sal wants to pursue why Perales was such an alarmist, something doesn’t add up, but Mau is sort of grateful, he now feels rejuvenated, and wants to remake his life. He starts to tell Moni how he feels, but she interrupts, says she knows what he said in the park doesn’t count now, things have changed, and he doesn’t quite get the chance to clear this up, as she says he should call Terry to relieve her anguish, which he does. After Terry is reassured, Moni, Mau and Sal again wonder how such a renowned doctor as Perales could have been so wrong, and Sal thinks it was no accident. He has his suspicions, and again, thinks it has something to do with the adoption.
In Jerry’s office, Oscar is holding up the earphone receiver, and he and Jerry, listening to every word from Mau’s office, realize the jig is up. Jerry wants to flee, but Oscar wants to hear more. They listen in, and hear Mau say he has a pending appointment with Dr. Perales, he’ll go, see what Perales says, and confront him. Sal wants to call the police, but Moni goes with Mau’s plan, and she’ll go with him, who needs police, she’ll handle the Doctor herself. Jerry tries to call Perales to warn him, but he doesn’t answer, so the race is on – who’ll get to Perales first?
The bad guys, of course, as we cut to the parking lot of a medical center, said Perales walks up the steps toward his office, and is met by Jerry and Oscar, who tell him Mauricio is on to him, he’d better come with them. Perales says he knew this was crazy, now he wants double. You’ll get a double kick in the rear if you don’t come with us now, says Jero. No way, says the Doc, as he headbutts both Jerry and Oscar, and rushes back to the parking lot. Mau and Moni zoom into the lot in Mau’s car, screeching to a stop to avoid hitting a pedestrian, but it’s the Doc! They jump out of the car, as Mau yells Run, Moni, Run! The chase is on, and now I see why Moni wore pants today.
Meanwhile, back at the office, we hear an uncensored fart, as Beto exits the bathroom (of Mau’s office), complaining why can’t he read his wrestling mag in peace, and Paula says he’s stinking up (apestando) the whole office. It took her a year to be allowed to clean this office, so he shouldn’t complain, now get this office clean and shiny. She leaves, and he diligently cleans the entire office….NOT. He drops the mop, drops the mag, and drops himself down into Mauricio’s chair. With his sneaker-clad feet on the desk, he dreams of being a bigwig, presses the intercom, says “take a memo, double the salary of Roberto Ochoa. Make that triple! Or better yet, what comes after triple?” He’s rudely interrupted by Gabi’s voice, remove your hands from that apparatus, or I’ll cut off your fingers with my fingernail clippers! Beto looks around, where’d that voice come from?
Estrella is warning Ximmy about Rolu. He doesn’t play clean. You mean he doesn’t bathe? asks our hiding heroine. No, he’s a vivales (someone only looking out for himself), or at least he looks (pinta) like one. Ximmy thinks he looks like a hunk (un cuero – literally a piece of leather), and has some cool, dark secrets, one of which she proceeds to whisper in Estre’s ear. Estre really wants Ximmy to think twice about Rolu, Ximmy can’t keep running forever. But for now, go back to the apartment, watch TV, try on some clothes, whatever, we’ll figure this out. Ximmy hugs her amiguita.
Speaking of running forever, Doctor Perales, who’s a big guy, is running through a park (same one they used for the Mau-Moni scene?), hiding behind some little trees, as the keystone cop music plays. Okay, now what’s wrong with this scene? Perales is going pretty fast, Moni’s zipping along in pursuit, and Mauricio (there’s nothing wrong with him, remember?), a tall young man in excellent shape, is the one who’s out of breath. Anyway, Perales ducks behind a tree, Moni runs right past (we also see she’s not wearing heels today, how convenient), but Mau catches up with the Doc, and demands to know who paid him. Talk!
Meanwhile back in the office, Gabi answers the phone, and it’s Lorenza. Again. She’s been calling every 15 minutes to find out who Sal’s seeing, and Gabi’s fed up. She tells Sal to do something. She tells Lorzena she can’t talk now, the lazy bum (zanguango) is here, and hangs up. Sal wonders, who’s the zanguango? It’s you, your wife said to use that code name for you, so as not to arouse suspicions. But you have to do something. Sal says they changed Lorenza’s meds, now she’s less psychotic, but more paranoid, which do you think is better? Why not just lock her up? replies Gabi.
Connie arrives, where’s Mau? They’re not telling, so she’ll wait in the office. She enters, and there’s Beto asleep in the chair, feet on the desk. She scolds him, but he wakes up, and immediately turns the tables. When she asks what’s with the uniform he’s wearing, he says he hopes she’ll take it off him, he stands up, pulls her close, starts stroking her hips. She pushes him away, don’t start. He can’t resist, you start me up, kisses her neck, lifts her off her feet, putting her down on the desk on her back, and starts kissing her neck again, going lower and lower! You’re like an octopus, she moans, please, no! He starts licking her neck, you say no, but your body says YES! The door opens, it’s Gabi and Sal, and this time, Connie and Beto are caught in flagrante delicto!
Previews: Lorenza’s back to her old hairstyle, demands Jerry tell her who’s the hussy. La Monita, he answers, and we see Lor’s car bearing down on an unsuspecting Moni. Look out!
Vocabulario:
No te me aloques que te necesito cuerdo – Don’t make yourself crazy when I need you sane
Un chaleco antibalas – a bulletproof vest
Desalentador – discouraging, disheartening
Superar – to go beyond, exceed something
Estudio de gabinete – laboratory study, gabinete can mean cabinet, office or laboratory
Vivales- someone who’s only looking out for himself
Un cuero – slang word for a hunk, also means leather
Zanguango – a lazy bum
BTW, when I couldn’t find some of these terms in the big Oxford dictionary, I was able to find them in El Pequeño Larousse Ilustrado, a Spanish-Spanish dictionary/encyclopedia, with lots of pictures, which I highly recommend.
Labels: gancho
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Great recap Hombre and I don't think I'll ever forget the words "uncensored fart". That just has a certain ring to it.
Excellent advice on the dictionary. I have the Spanish-Spanish Larousse but not downstairs where I write the recaps. Will bring it down right now!
And folks, if you missed Carlos' link to the I Love Lucy geisha youtube, check yesterday's recap. It's a hoot and the Gancho scene was obviously based on it.
Excellent advice on the dictionary. I have the Spanish-Spanish Larousse but not downstairs where I write the recaps. Will bring it down right now!
And folks, if you missed Carlos' link to the I Love Lucy geisha youtube, check yesterday's recap. It's a hoot and the Gancho scene was obviously based on it.
Oh yes, thanks for the excellent recap, H de M. All you recappers are SO great at this. You have no idea how much you are appreciated.
Thanks for the great recap Hombre. I especially loved your observations or rant ;) about doctors. It was very funny and unfortunately very true regarding the characterizations of doctors in novelas. I wonder what's up with that?
Also thanks Sylvia for your great recap too.
It will be interesting to see if the one episode problem resolution continues to operate in this novela if Moni does get hit on Monday.
Also thanks Sylvia for your great recap too.
It will be interesting to see if the one episode problem resolution continues to operate in this novela if Moni does get hit on Monday.
Hombre: Excellent! Informative and fun (as always). Your vocabulary was stellar. I wish I could have incorporated "No te me aloques que te necesito cuerdo" into something. I plan to use it at the first opportunity I have!
Happy (and amazed) all of these roadblocks (false pregnancy and health misdiagnosis) are being cleared up quickly! If only real life were that easy!
Diana in MA
Happy (and amazed) all of these roadblocks (false pregnancy and health misdiagnosis) are being cleared up quickly! If only real life were that easy!
Diana in MA
Permalink posted by 
: Monday, August 17, 2009 at 6:57:00 AM EDT
: Monday, August 17, 2009 at 6:57:00 AM EDT
Good morning everyone. OK I'm shocked that there was actually an uncensored fart in this episode. After the two little toots that got squelched they let this big one in?
Great recap Hombre, and I think your title sums it up. Never, ever have I seen a fake diagnosis cleared up so quickly. I loved your rant on how doctors are portrayed. It was funny and very true.
Lorenza is starting to annoy me. I hope she gets thrown in jail after she hits Moni on Monday.
Great recap Hombre, and I think your title sums it up. Never, ever have I seen a fake diagnosis cleared up so quickly. I loved your rant on how doctors are portrayed. It was funny and very true.
Lorenza is starting to annoy me. I hope she gets thrown in jail after she hits Moni on Monday.
Hombre, once more a super funny recap of a very funny episode. It looks like they've set up another hospital episode for me with Moni being hit by the car. It's a little soon for another coma so I'm trusting that we'll get her fixed up in no time.
I'm wondering how Connie and Beto will explain their little get together to Sal and Gabi. Neither is a big fan of Connie, or Beto, for that matter. Tonight should be entertaining.
Carlos
I'm wondering how Connie and Beto will explain their little get together to Sal and Gabi. Neither is a big fan of Connie, or Beto, for that matter. Tonight should be entertaining.
Carlos
Diana - I had said no te me aloques was "don't make yourself crazy", but maybe it's more like "don't go crazy on me" (because of the te). I'm pretty sure of the second part "because I need you sane". I think I could use this phrase with various family members :)
Carlos: Given the track record of the show, Beto and Connie are almost certain to get out of their clinch. Maybe she'll say she dropped her earring, and he's retrieving it?
Carlos: Given the track record of the show, Beto and Connie are almost certain to get out of their clinch. Maybe she'll say she dropped her earring, and he's retrieving it?
She had a muscle cramp in her back, and he's helping her stretch it out? He tripped and fell and she caught him?
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