Caray, Caray!

By Lila


“It's a family affair, it's a family affair
It's a family affair, it's a family affair
One child grows up to be
Somebody that just loves to learn
And another child grows up to be
Somebody you'd just love to burn”

Sly and The Family Stone



My friends! I hope everyone had a warm, fuzzy, and awesome Christmas or whatever sacred holiday you cherish. I know you all have been waiting for tonight and I am honored to be your little fly on the wall! I’ve got a lot of places to buzz around to so let’s get to it!

Left Overs

Isidro presses the bank official for final results on Renata’s fingerprints. Renata calling hotels in Vegas looking for Sow-ul and cradling her baby bump, assuring it everything will be all right. Autustin calls and she is brusque and brief with him! Augustin feigns ignorance about Jeronimo’s disappearance and hisses his intention to see her tomorrow, “Mi Amor.”

The painfully swollen Jeronimo deliriously mumbles Lazaro and Matilde’s names and unclogs the cogs in Sabina’s noggin. She’s knows Jero is the Patron missing from La Bonita!


Served up Hot Tonight

At Empresas Monterrubio: Germy and Berta bid farewell to Gonzo, off to “take care of business.” Berta pretends to be concerned about the goings on with Jeronimo and Renata, Gonzo gazes sternly from under his brow at Germy, and instructs him to take good care of his daughter. I’m sure he will, Gonzo.

Over in Hon’s office, he and Matias are joined by Adri who has confirmed that Germy and Berta have an appointment outside the empresas. They speculate about how they’ll be received when they crash the love nest. Adri mocks Roberta’s probable copping of a plea of abuse by Germy. Matias asks about the impact of this illicit rendezvous on the empresa. Hon’s bottom line is no matter how accomplished in business, Ibarrola has abused the confidence of the Monterrubios with his accosting of Beth and his bedding of Bert.

We’re with Gema now, lost in thought and sepia-toned flashbacks of Germy begging off from their spending time together during his weekend business trip. . . her shrug and shake of the head tells us she didn’t buy his story that it’s a boring good ole’ boys weekend.

Now we’re back in Saul’s former office where Marina and the Nurse are rifling through his things looking for evidence of the bastard’s whereabouts. They jimmy open a desk and Marina examines what looks like bills and a matchbook from a hotel.

Ah. . . now we’re in Isidro and Ines’ house where Ines, Connie and Regina chat about how well the women at the Center have recovered from the drama of the previous week. In files Gonzo, Isidro and Tony. Gonzo and Regina are expectant but nervous and want to get to the point. Isidro and Ines share a look of delighted anticipation.

Not yet. . . .Speaking of delight, we cut to Fina sniffing and caressing wads of Euros, Pesos and Dollars informing the cash with a grin that soon she will be far away from here, poised to complete the job she started 25 years ago. She, too, is swept away in a reverie of remembrance of the day she kidnapped baby Regina (Renata). We are forced to relive the day she hired a goon to create a distraction by stealing Regina’s purse as baby Regina/Renata was grabbed. (Yes, writers, stoke the fires of hatred for this miserable, self-centered, psychopathic wretch whose hatred for the woman SHE tortured has not abated in all those twenty five years. Thus we can more completely enjoy her demise!) Fina details her plan, never missing a beat in her counting or cackling: She plans to reveal Renata’s true identity as Regina’s Daughter after she and Roberta have left for Switzerland with the inheritance money but by that time Renata will be dead. Fina cynically pats herself on the back for having “let” Rentata live for many years but now her hour has come: She plans to kill Renata!

Back at Isidro’s. . . were Regina is reminded of the process they had to go through to verify that Roberta was indeed the baby she gave birth to and which was stolen from her: Roberta’s fingerprints had to be compared with those on the birth certificate of the child she gave birth to. Regina’s face is frozen in a kind of disbelieving suspense but Ines looks almost radiant as she declares that fingerprints never change from the time we are born. Gonzo gives words to the suspense which has congealed in Regina’s face: “Where are you going with all this?” Thus comes the words we’ve been waiting for:

“The analysis reveals that the fingerprints of Roberta do not correspond to those on the birth certificate of your daughter,” states Isidro.

“Como?” Regina begins to thaw.

“ROBERTA MONTERRUBIO NO ES TU HIJA!”

Regina protests that this can’t be! The DNA tests confirmed that Roberta is her daughter. Isidro calmly and firmly maintains he doesn’t know how but the DNA test results were wrong: Roberta is NOT the daughter that was stolen from her.

Connie, as jubilant as Ines beams that she knew all along that Roberta couldn’t be her daughter cause she’s nothing like Regina or any of the Monterubbios. Gonzo has picked up the glow now. “If Roberta is not Regina’s daughter then does this mean that Renata is?” With this question Regina begins to allow the shock to melt away. . . until Gonzo suggests maybe it’s neither of them and this is a further lie of Josefina!

Back at Monterrubio Mansion Renata is, of course, oblivious to all the high drama swirling around her identity as she continues her search for Saul and thus clues to the whereabouts of Jeronimo. Panchita announces and then ushers in Marina who gives her the hotel papers from Saul’s desk. Renata immediately begins to call the number on the papers.

Back at Isidro’s. . Antonio speaks: ”Regina, I promised you I wouldn’t rest until I found your Daughter and God has allowed me to complete this mission. It gives me great pleasure to tell you that we found your Daughter and now there is not the least doubt. Regina, the daughter that you have searched for almost twenty four years is no other than Renata, Renata Monterrubio. Renata Monterrubio and Regina Gamba Soberon are the same person and here is the proof.” Antonio’s solemn words are tempered with a soft smile as he hands Regina the documents. Regina gasps and stares at the papers. . . .

Again we’re with Renata as she asks in English if Saul is staying at the hotel. She gets a yes and hands the phone to Marina as it rings. Ugh! I, for one, could have done without this shot of Saul’s hairy gams. . .or, whatever they’re called on guys (notice I’m not calling her Maritata!). When Saul answers Marina completes the ruse by asking in English for Edward Smith. Saul answers, also in English that no, she has the wrong room. “It’s him!” whispers Marina. Renata promptly proposes they take off for Vegas to trap this first third of the Rat Pack. Marina is persuaded by the Velvet Steamroller that is Renata. You go Girl! Her 57 varieties of tears are sooo last week.

“Renata is Regina’s Daughter!” “Say it loud and there’s music playing. Say it soft and it’s almost like praying!” Gonzo fairly sings. “Then, my real Daughter is Renata?” Regina asks, joy struggling to flutter from her heart to her tear-streaked face. “Of course,” Connie joins the chorus: it all makes sense why Fina always treated Renata better, it all makes sense. Ines reminds Regina how Regina herself has always felt a special, inexplicable connection to Renata. “Yes, I always felt the call of the blood,” cries Regina, the smile having made it to her face, to her eyes. “But I thought Roberta was my daughter,” Regina cries. “But the fingerprints don’t lie!” Ines beams. “Renata IS your Daughter!” Ines sings the happy chorus. Gonzo begins putting the pieces together, Renata’s heart defect added to the confusion. (Gonzo gives us insight into how he was able to live under the same roof with Fina and never notice her emotional abuse of Renata and Matias: after two baby abductions, feigned brain tumor and insanity, theft, realized and attempted murder, he attributes this to a failure or confusion, not a deliberate manipulation . . .) Antonio repeats his earlier confirmation of Renata as her Daughter, this time with a smile that brightens even his beady eyes and sweeps around the room.

Phew. After that emotional intensity we’re in the kitchen of La Bonita where Alfonsina, holding her impossibly fat and cute baby discusses the likely murder of Ezekiel with Laz and Kari. Alfie wonders if Mal-icio knows anything. Laz warns her to keep her distance from Melesio, that he is baaad news. The toss of Alfie’s head tells us she’s got other ideas.

The dynamic duo with Jero’s trio in tow make their way down the escalator at the airport.

Gonzo gently explains that this is the answer to the photograph confusion: the first picture Fina sent to Regina was actually her Daughter, Renata. She argues again that she herself took Roberta’s brush which was submitted for the DNA test. Isidro suggests that the hair brush may not have been Roberta’s and Fina may have switched the names on the toothbrushes. Regina rides the emotional pendulum between excitement over knowing Renata is her daughter and back to despair and confusion and then alarm: How will she ever tell Roberta? How will she take it? Regina knows that they all don’t trust Roberta but she has grown to believe her and treat her like a daughter. She is afraid it will break her heart! Ines comes close to Regina and meets her at eye level: “And Renata. What about Renata? Hasn’t she suffered enough thinking her mother was a crazy killer?” Overtaken by a new wave of deliriously joyous tears Regina cries that she is dying to see Renata and hold her in her arms. “I always loved her before I knew she was my Duaghter, now I love her even more!”

. .but she does not want to forget Roberta, she does not want to hurt her. Ines gently delivers a verbal wake up slap that Gonzo feels when she reminds Regina that she herself not only had doubts Roberta was her daughter but thought she may even have been in cahoots with Fina. Gonzo is like “Como?”. Damn straight says Ines (or the equivalent thereof) . . .Ines says she thinks not only has Roberta continued to see Fina but is involved in this whole “error” (Ines punctuates with big air quotes) of DNA results. Gonzo wants someone to explain how they could possibly have these suspicions.

Valle de Bravo, Estado de Mexico. Ahhhh, it’s the “business” meeting and Berty and Germy are just arriving.

I think we’ve been spared the surely arduous task of clueing Gonzo in on Berta’s machinations with mommy. He gets it but Regina denies its possibility. Gonzo agrees with Isidro that before the girls are told about this “new” revelation about their identities, it must be determined if Roberta has been Fina’s accomplice all this time. Regina continues to protest. Connie maintains firmly that Regina must remember that Fina is not only Roberta’s mother but raised her as well imparting all her eeeevil. Regina can’t understand why? Why did Fina do this to her? Ambition and Money offers Brother Antonio. Pepa has been after the money Roberto left his Daughter when she turned twenty five. Gonzo and Isidro want to entrap Roberta by letting her think she is getting her inheritance and then following her as she seeks out Fina as she surely will. Connie is concerned about Renata being left in the dark. She has a right to know Fina is NOT her mother and Regina is. Regina agrees and wants to tell Renata herself and embrace her as her Mother. Gonzo says it’s a plan: They can count on Renata’s discretion but not a word to Roberta! By George! I think he’s got it!.

Back at the airport Renata questions Marina about how well she knows Saul, if she knows if he was capable of hurting Jeronimo. Marina doesn’t have much confidence in him though she doesn’t know what motives he would have for hurting Jeronimo. . .unless it’s for money which he loves more than anything. Who could provide him with that kind of money? Marina muses it must be someone who wanted Renata and Jeronimo separated. Hmmm. Who could that be? Marina says perhaps Augustin. Renata has her Gonzo moment: “How could you possibly think that of Augustin.” Marina spills Augustin’s proposal that she ally herself with him to break Renata and Jero up. A proposal which she, of course, declined. Cara impactada de Renata.

Pissypants knipps at Carlos’ heels, ragging him about Matilde as they walk amongst huge shiny stanless vats of wine. He fires her ass. Nuff said.

Anibal and Alison are sitting in the parlor at La Bonita. Anibal has decided to tell all on Auggie. Alison snags Laz and Carlos to listen as Anibal tells them of Augie contracting Saul to stop Jero and Renata’s wedding.

Alfie follows her boobies through the shiny, plastic, amber beads of a curtain in a cheap little cantina where Melecio sits at a table. She asks to join him in a copita of tequila to drown the sadness that clings to her over that stupid Eziquel who took his own life. She throws the copita back in one quick swig and Melesio inhales the heat rising from her bosom and moves in to retrieve the tequila from her throat but she turns away. “That damned coward, leaving me, leaving his children.” Melesio swallows hard and eyes her breasts as if they each coo as sweetly as does Alfie’s pouting lips.

Back at La Bonita Anibal is on a roll. He tells of how he saw proof on Auggie’s computer that he was investigating Marina and Saul. Alison helps tell how Auggie threatened to kill Anibal for messing with his computer. He told Anibal that he could not abide traitors. Carlos and Laz want to get their hands on the proof!

Regina and Gonzo back at former Hell Hacienda look for Their Daughter but are given a note from Renata saying that she and Marina have gone to Vegas! Say What? Go Gonzo and Regina.

Super Laz, Carlos and Super Anibal in training sneak over to Cruz Sin Amor just as Augustin is leaving. They whisper to each other that Auggie is probably going to Mexico City to look for Renata, so they’re in luck. They tip toe through the blue haze of night into his study and have their hands on his computer when. Doh! Auggie forgot his cell and has come back! They scatter like cucarachas when the light comes on. His maid comes in and hands him his cell and he thankfully leaves right away, barking on his way out. Whew! The Tremendous Trio grab the lap top and high-tail it back to La Bonita.

Now we are with Hon, Matias and Renata as he relays to them from Connie that it is confirmed that Renata is Regina’s Daughter. They grin with glee and hug. Renata will find out that her mother is not a demon but a Saint and finally she is going to have some happiness after so many disgraces. (Ouch! I know there’re only two weeks left but Adri, tempteth not more anvils!) Ok, Hon reminds them to stay focused, that they’re on a mission. Adri whips out her camera and off they go.

Roberta and Germy clad in their post-business attire enjoy glasses of wine and afterglow. Their slurping and stroking shares the screen with the urgent yet quiet strides of the Bod Squad. Busting these two bods, that is. Click, goes the camera as we catch the canoodling duo in the center of the frame. The second click catches Germy wide/wild-eyed impactado. Germy has the nerve to demand what are THEY are doing there? Hon, Mat and Adri take turns ripping in to them: Germy has not only shown a glaring lack of respect for Gonzalo Monterrubio and the entire Empresa but an absolute lack of trustworthiness. Their age difference is cited, that Roberta could be his daughter. But she’s not, she shouts and tries to throw them all out. Adri smiles sweetly that yeah, they’ll leave and take with them the evidence of what kind of people they are. She chides Germy for being a man that likes to extract youth through trysts with young women but lets him know that Roberta would never be with him if she thought she couldn’t extract money from him! Hon parts with you two are birds of a feather and Gonzo is going to know of this right away!

“BUENAS NOCHES!” salutes Gema as she marches in! Time for Germy to swallow hard as Roberta looks off with a “well I’ll be dipped” look.

Back at La Bonita. . .Anibal, Laz and Carlos run in with the lap top and Anibal furiously pounds the keys as Kari, Mati and Alison look on. Oh crap! Auggie changed the password! They start a guessing game.

Gema demands an explanation and Germy stammers, “How did you know we were here?” This is a cue for big mouth Berta to have the nerve to accuse The Bod Squad of telling on them. Gema lets them no that she didn’t need any information from Roberta’s family nor did she know they were there. She had her suspicions and investigated with Beth. Germy had fallen in his usual pattern of being artificially attentive to her. A sure sign that he had another “chippy” on his shoulder. She asks why indeed are they there and Adri shares that they, too, had suspicions and came to unmask them. Adri smiles and waves her camera as Gema turns to Germy and whollops him so hard Adri gasps and grabs her own face! Oh Lord, man, just. shut. up. He tries to say he and Roberta only have a business relationship. Well, it’s the second firing of the night. Gema makes a present of Germy to Roberta, but she can have him as he was a few minutes ago – butt nekkid - and how he was when she met him - without a dime! He’s free to keep seducing young tarts of easy virtue like Roberta. Germy gulps like a guppy but no words come out.

Uh. Help me out here. Who’s bed is Auggie laying on as he calls Renata’s cell phone? Creep-o-lah! This is the second third of the Rat Pack! Panchita answers and tells him Renata isn’t in the Hacienda de los Huevos Grandes. For a minute I though she was going to tell him she went to Las Vegas! Phew! Augustin curses that she’s not at home crying in pain.

The La Bonita hackers have run out of steam. Kari suggests Anibal have at it again after some rest.

Aye. Pobrecito de Jeronimo. (Man! Televisa does hellified makeup no?) Jeronimo is actually doing better than he looks, his temperature is under control. Sabina has been thinking about the things Jeronimo mumbled. Sabina is resolved to look for Matilde’s phone number and call her: she is convinced there is a connection.

Roberta nags Germy as they leave the Luuurv Shack. He’s an imbecile, he should’ve been more discrete and no one would’ve found them. .Germy’s turn: How was he to know her family was on to them and she need not play the innocent with him, she’s certainly done this before. She tries to defend her honor by warming the side of his face Gema didn’t fire up but he catches her hand and wrenches it down. He refuses to let her put all the blame on him. To her question what happens to us he answers you need to try to straighten things out with your family as I try to do the same with my wife. Roberta fires back with her disappointment and anger that Germy did not protect her as he promised. Germy reminds her of how he covered the money she embezzled from the business. This brings Berta down a notch and she tries a different approach. She wants to know why Germy doesn’t go to Gonzo and tell him Roberta did indeed think it was a business meeting but he tricked her. No, Germy is not going to make a fool of himself in front of Gonzo with that cock and bull story. Roberta begins to whine. “Why did you tell me you loved me and would leave your wife for me?” (Need help with his reply): “Como, por que iba a mentirle?” Because I lied to you?

Regina, Connie and Gonzo at Connie’s: Regina is talking to Antonio on the phone who is in the Church. She tells Antonio that Renata and Marina have gone to Las Vegas. Antonio tells her he thinks it best that he return to Valle de Guadelupe, that he may be of some help there to find Jeronimo. She thanks him for keeping his promise to help her find her Daughter. She will never forget him, nor never be able to thank him enough. Antonio looks like a man at peace.

Gonzo and Regina face Connie. Regina asks where Hon, Mat and Adri are? “Well, I won’t hesitate to tell you now that you know Roberta is not your daughter. As a matter of fact this proves that she is the spawn of satan, I mean, Fina, aw, same thing.” Gonzo wants to know what Roberta has to do with the whereabouts of Hon, Mat and Adri. “Because, they went to expose German and Roberta. They were not on a business trip but they were spending the weekend together because THEY ARE LOVERS.” Regina is stunned, Gonzo is stern and turns with pursed lips to look at Connie as the color drains from his face.


Preview: Fina and Roberta kiss and make up and then are surrounded by police; the third member of the Rat Pack, Saul, is confronted in the middle of the casino by Renata and Marina: Jackpot! He spills the truth like a slot machine spilling coins!


Thank you for your attention, my friends! Let the revelations continue as this year and our time of scholarly voyeurism come to an end. I’ll see you in comments but let me take this opportunity to thank you for letting me ramble and rant at you like this, it’s been fun and I hope you enjoyed it too. It’s wee hours so I’ll see you all later in cyberspace! I wish you all a New Year full of Peace, Prosperity and Love!

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